Shawn Armstrong
29 September 2012
Throughout the world there are many languages, within these languages there comes
different dialects as well as subgroups. The language is English and the sub group would be the
military. As I have served in the Army for ten years, I have come to learn this manner of
speaking as a way of life. As long as you stay within the confines of the military you are around
everyone who speaks in this manner. But once you decide to leave gates of the Army, outside is
what is known as the civilian world. Upon entering this world known as normal life it is bit of a
shock in some ways, similar to being woken from a drunken night with a bucket of ice water. In
the Army we are not always at times the most politically correct or proper in speaking. I mean in
the use of profanity is heavily used to describe everything and used in every adjective. I believe
once had a conversation with an old platoon Sergeant of mine and he probably used the “f” word
in every form that a word in English can be used. Yet in normal life this is something that is
extremely frowned upon due to the fact that in public one is seldom not very far from the earshot
of someone’s child.
Acronyms are very helpful pneumonic devices to remember the names of organizations,
mathematical formulas, or shorten versions of longer words that it would be otherwise very
tedious to write out ex: CPR= Cardio Pulmonary Resuscitation. However in the military,
throughout the branches; Acronyms are used for just about everything, everything to the point
where an outsider would need a cheat sheet to understand an everyday conversation between
service members. Here is a cheat sheet of most commonly used acronyms:
DFAC=
PCS=
Pronounced: “dee-fack” stands for Dinning Facility aka a cafeteria
Pronounced: “pee-cee-ess” stands for Permanent Change of Station aka
you’re moving on
ETS=
Pronounced: “ ee-tee-ess” stands for Expected Termination of Service aka
you’re moving out
PMCS=
Pronounced: “pee-em-cee-ess” stands for Preventative Maintenance Checks
and Services aka check your shit when get it for it maybe fucked up, oops!
See prime example of profanity use.
CM=
Pronounced: “Charlie Mike” means Continue Mission, can be applied to all
things in life
HMMWV= Pronounced: “Hum-Vee” Stands for High Mobility Multipurpose Wheeled
Vehicle aka the Hummers you see on television
SPORTS=
Pronounced: “sports” Stands for Slap Pull Observe Release Tap and Shoot
used to un-jam an M-16, can be applied to things in life
CO=
Pronounced: “cee-oh” stands for Commanding Officer aka King Shit
oops! The Boss
XO=
Pronounced: “ex-oh” stands for Executive Officer; second in command
does CO’s bitch work
LC=
Pronounced: “lema-charlie” means loud and clear; can be used in regular
day to day tasks
HUA=
Pronounced: “hoo-ah” stands for Heard Understood and Acknowledged;
most commonly used acronym in the army, a replacement for the word yes
PX/BX=
Pronounced: “pee-ex/bee-ex” stand for Post/Base Exchange; Wal-Mart of
the army
AAFES=
Pronounced: “ey-fees” stands for Army Air force Exchange System:
Company that owns the P/BX throughout the world
Acronyms are not the only thing that military language is about; there are also
replacements words for certain items. There is no purpose behind it other than I can guess the
reason of simply sounding manly. For example: a cover/headgear is a hat, a latrine is a restroom,
chow is food, a weapon is a gun and barracks are dorms/living condos. So on an average day you
might hear a conversation similar to this:
“Hey Private, go PMCS your HMMWV, then go the
DFAC and pick up chow for the CO”. To a civilian I imagine this would be the most confusing
thing they ever heard. But this was my life for about a decade.
Writing in the military, is a whole other issue in its self. For there are many forms, that
have specific jobs, pretty much for any action that you must do on a daily basis there a form for
it. Not only are there a wide variety of forms to memorize but they are all number coded. It’s
crazy because you come to point where, sadly you memorize these codes. For example if a
soldier approaches you and says” Hey Sergeant, I didn’t get paid this month” you have to
instruct the individual to fill out a DA form 2142 and you have turn this paper in to your boss,
and in turn he does the same thing about eight more times. So while this soldier has no money
and starving, there is a paper bouncing between ten people on its way to finance office asking
why he didn’t get paid. Because it would be wrong if I drove the soldier the office myself, it like
the army in general must be allergic to common sense at times. Out of all the forms in the
Department of the Army’s infinite existence, my favorite had to be the DA form 4856. Otherwise
known as The Developmental Counseling Form or the dreaded “Counseling Statement” this form
is the know all, be all, tell all of Soldier’s behavior throughout his career. To write these forms
properly definitely tested one’s intellect, grammar and mostly creative writing ability. You had
to inform a soldier on his or hers’ progression; usually done monthly, towards a successful
career. It had to include one positive and what they needed to improve on without hurting their
“feelings”. Though out my career, I had development my skills to where I could have a
complete retard of a soldier but make his incompetent behavior to him seem like professional
blunders that needed improving. That was the fun part but mostly these forms really had no
relevant purpose other than to prove you had dexterity in you dominant hand. The DA form
7566 comes to mind. It is a Risk Assessment Form, and must be filled out in order do anything
fun. If I want to my soldiers out to eat, I would have to fill out three of these forms, yes three of
them. One for the drive there, one for the restaurant, and one for the drive back. So essentially I
have fill out a series of three forms stating that on my way to a restaurant, I might get an
accident…. Maybe, once I get to the restaurant, I might choke on some food….. Maybe, and we
might get hit again on the way back... maybe.
So once I made the decision to leave the constraints of the military and return to what is
known as civilian life, there were definitely some adjustments that I had to make and still make.
For one no one outside the Army says “hoo-ah” or really knows what it means. So the month out
going to mall and being out and about definitely earned me a lot of strange looks from the
General public. But now the adjustment has gotten much better but I still have to watch my
profanity, because in hindsight; it is kind of embarrassing going into a nice clothing store asking
the nice lady: “Excuse me Ma’am, I’m looking for some red shoes like, real fucking red with a
tie and shit to get with it, Do you know where in this confusing motherfucker they can be
found?”. Boy the look on that woman’s face was priceless yet the sad part is that I didn’t even
realize what I had done until I saw her face. I’m sure I’m not the only vet that experiences but its
life so you just have to Charlie Mike.