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THEUNITEDSTATESOFAMERICA
THUNITDSTATSOFAMRICA
We have two ears and one mouth so that we can
listen twice as much as we speak. ~ Epictetus
•Of the time spent communicating each day, 45% is devoted to
listening.
•Usually a person only remembers about 50% of what is said to
them.
•After eight hours they forget another 1/2 to 1/3 of what was
originally grasped.
?
So that means you typically forget about
what you hear.
75%
of
Why is listening important?
Listening will help you in…
•School
•Relationships
•Social groups & organizations
•Making informed decisions
•On the job
FACT or FICTION??
Listening and hearing are the same thing.
Hearing is the first step but doesn’t mean you
understand what you hear.
Listening is easy.
Listening is a complex process that requires energy,
effort, and skills.
The speaker is primarily responsible for the message sent.
Speaker and listener share the responsibility. A
listener may have to make up for a sender’s lack of
ability.
Steps in the listening process
You first respond
emotionally, then
intellectually. Then you
decide how to respond.
Your knowledge,
attitudes, values,
beliefs and self-concept
influences your
perception.
Your own needs,
interests, attitudes, and
knowledge affects your
choice to pay attention.
Not everyone hears the
same way. Men
actually prefer certain
frequencies.
Hearing
The reception of
sound.
Choosing
Understanding
Responding
Your reaction to
the message. It
can be emotional
and intellectual.
Deciding what the
message means to
you.
The act of
choosing to focus
attention on the
message.
Definition of listening:
It is a physical and psychological
process that involves choosing to listen,
understanding, and responding to
symbolic messages from others.
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Noise – Internal and external distractions
◦ Examples: outside sounds, distracting thoughts
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Barriers – Blocks listening/understanding.
◦ Unfamiliar language, anger, attitudes, biases, needs,
beliefs, fear, hearing problems, tuning out, stress,
ignorance, prejudices, tired.
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Memory – 3 types
◦ Immediate – Recalling information for a brief period of
time.
◦ Short term – Recalling information for carrying out a routine
or daily task.
◦ Long term – Recalling information from past experience.
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The average person speaks at a rate of about
150 words per minute.
Listeners, however, can understand messages
presented at a rate of 380 words per minute.
Often that “lag” time causes listeners to let
their minds wander.
You have to learn to focus your attention on
the message.
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Active listener – The listener participates fully in
the communication process. You listen attentively,
provide feedback, and strive to understand and
remember messages.
Passive listener – The listener does not actively
participate in interactions. They think they can
absorb information even when they do not
contribute to the interaction. They place the
responsibility for successful communication on the
speaker.
Impatient listener – Short bursts of active listening
are interrupted by noise and other distractions.
They intend to pay attention, but allow their minds
to wander.
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Apply what you hear to yourself.
◦ Relate the information to your personal experience.
◦ Use your own knowledge to understand new information.
◦ Imagine using the information in the future.
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Think as you listen
◦ Summarize and review throughout a presentation.
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Use associations
◦ Picture things in your mind – “see it”
◦ Use mnemonic devices – rhyme, acronym, etc.
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Take notes
◦ Do not write every word – paraphrase; focus on key phrases.
◦ Use the same method for taking notes.
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Give feedback
◦ Show others you are listening with body language and eye
contact and ask questions.
Listening for fun.
Used when listening to
lectures in class.
Used in social situations like concerts,
plays or sporting events.
Used when listening to
announcements or getting directions.
Goal is enjoyment and helps a person
to relax.
Used when you need to remember
something important.
Listening to enjoy or appreciate a
speaker’s message or performance.
Listening to comprehend ideas and information in order
to achieve a specific purpose or goal.
Kinds of Listening
Listening to understand, participate
and enhance a relationship.
Usually used in interactions between
two people or a small group.
Goal is to develop understanding and appreciation
of the meanings & feelings of sender.
Listening to understand, analyze, and
evaluate messages.
Used when receiving and evaluating
persuasive messages.
Use when you must make decisions.
You try to put yourself in another
person’s place, but not necessarily
agree with them.
It should make you think.
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1. Tuning out dull topics.
◦ Many listeners decide early on that a topic is simply not interesting.
However, it has been said that there are no uninteresting subjects,
only uninterested people. Don’t be a lazy listener!
◦ Remedy – Listen for something you want or need. You can always
find something of value in what another person is saying.
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2. Faking attention.
◦ It’s no sin to be courteous, but sometimes we take manners to an
unfortunate extreme. When we find someone’s conversation
boring, but are too polite (or afraid) to risk offending the person,
we pretend to pay attention, though our minds are a thousand
miles away.
◦ Remedy – Sincerely pay attention. Lean forward, maintain good eye
contact, react in a natural way with smiles or nods, ask questions.
Good listening is not passive – it takes energy to listen!
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3. Yielding to distractions.
◦ Outside noises or movements often affect our concentration. A
window drops shut, someone sneezes, a book falls to the floor. All
too often, we give our attention to the hubbub of activity around us
instead of the speaker in front of us.
◦ Remedy – Choose a suitable environment to have conversations.
Learn to ignore the distractions and don’t become a distraction.
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4. Criticizing delivery or physical appearance.
◦ Many people abandon their good listening habits when they
become overly critical of the speaker’s physical appearance or
delivery. Regardless of who the speaker is, the content of his/her
message is always far more important than the form of his/her
delivery.
◦ Remedy – Pay attention to what is said, not how. Be generous
enough to overlook difficulties the speaker is having.
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5. Jumping to conclusions.
◦ Be patient. We often think that we know what a person is going to
say before they have even finished speaking. Occasionally, we are
biased toward a speaker and so we close our minds to the
speaker’s message before we have heard it in its entirety.
◦ Remedy – Don’t judge before you have heard the whole message.
Hear the speaker out. Understand their point of view fully before
accepting or rejecting it.
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6. Interrupting.
◦ Do you spend most of your listening time actually listening or do
you spend it thinking about what you want to say? Interrupting
someone is an almost certain sign that you don’t know or care
about what the other person is saying.
◦ Remedy – Take time to think about what is being said before
responding. Wait for an opening. Put yourself in their shoes.
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7. Overreacting to emotional words.
◦ We will react from time to time to certain words or phrases that
push our “hot buttons.” At such times, we might experience a
strong emotional reaction that blocks out your ability to listen. We
might let our thoughts wander on to other subjects, blocking the
speaker’s message from our minds, or we might start to lay plans
to trap the speaker in some way.
◦ Remedy – Stay calm. Finish listening. Don’t let a mere symbol for
something stand between you and learning. Think before
responding.