Gorham 1
Kourtney Gorham
Dr. Kathleen Wall
English 251 – 001
16 October 2012
Happiness: A Moral Choice
1. Introduction
Happiness is a universal desire and many individuals believe that it is life’s purpose. Happiness is a
state of being in which individuals choose to face challenges with a positive mindset. Happiness is
intrinsic for a great life. It is separate from good fortune and material goods; instead, it is a selfgenerated virtue found inside individuals. Therefore, someone who lives on the streets or has a physical
disability can be happy because happiness derives from a positive attitude and is separate from life
circumstances. A happy person can experiences all other emotions, including sadness; these emotions
are essential so that people can grow and reflect. Overall happiness is an ethical contribution to the
world around you. It can be attained with a positive attitude, the ability to accept mistakes, being happy
with what you have and performing small acts of kindness for others.
Since ca. 300 BC happiness has been described, debated and depicted as something of importance.
Today we still need to question the definition of happiness because the viewpoints of society are always
changing. The 21st century mindset that happiness is in direct correlation to how much money one
acquires is very troubling. It is true that basic needs – food, water, shelter and security – can help
individuals achieve a happy state of mind. But the problem is that people confuse their wants as needs.
For example, name brand clothing does not fulfill our need of warmth any more than no-name clothing.
Purchasing material goods may provide temporary bliss, due to a dopamine hit, but it does not create
overall happiness. When the excitement wears off we eventually search for a new product. The cycle
never ends.
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Wealth works in opposition to a happy life. People buy items out of spite of their neighbours; they
want to have the nicest car or house on the block. Instead of buying things for each other out of
kindness, people buy things for themselves out of jealousy. This concept ignores the idea that doing
kind things for others can lead to happiness. Happiness instills a sense of value and meaning in one’s
life. For example, a drug dealer could be very rich but they may not be happy knowing that they are
hurting others.
Working as a medication counsellor at Camp Easter Seal – the only wheelchair
accessible and level four care equipped camp in Saskatchewan – made me challenge my assumptions
about what it means to lead a happy life.
2. A Positive Attitude
It seems quite obvious that positive thoughts would lead to overall happiness. Yet people thrive
off negative comments and complaining. In the winter you hear, “the weather is too cold.” In the
summer people complain that the weather is too hot. And it is not only the weather; people complain
about their possession, their meetings, their appearance and the people they interact with. Complaints
are endless.
Chad, a seventeen year old boy with a brave spirit, love for adrenaline rushes and large muscled
arms from wheeling in his wheelchair, always wears a smile on his face. I spent time listening to this
happy, youthful boy tell me about the adrenalin rush he feels when he races down a hill in his
wheelchair. Chad was born with spina bifida, a developmental disorder where the spinal cord is not fully
formed and protrudes through the bones (“Spina Bifida”). Chad has no feeling from the waist down and
cannot use his legs. He will never be able to walk or experience the same freedom as his peers. That is
something real to complain about; instead, a smile never leaves Chad’s face and he never complains
about his life circumstances.
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Chad’s bathroom routine takes over half an hour; a task that only takes me a few minutes.
Without legs to stand on, pulling down his pants to go to the bathroom is a huge ordeal. With one hand
he grabs onto his wheelchair and lifts his whole body off the seat while the other hand works to slide
down his pants. Yet, he is thankful for his arms and hands and never dwells on his unusable legs. The
simple need to go to the bathroom causes Chad to miss fun activities. He cannot take the little things
for granted the way I do, but he is still happy. Chad has shown me that any challenge can be overcome
with a positive attitude.
“Every day when you wake up, you have two choices: be sad or be happy,” Chad told me one
morning after he finished putting on his clothes, two hours after he started the task. “I could be sad
that I can’t use my legs, but then again, I could just be happy that I have my strong arms.”
3. Accepting Mistakes
Accepting our mistakes is a skill that I think we lose as adults. When we are younger we are not
afraid to try; after all, it usually results in a few laughs from the adults around us. When a toddler takes
their first steps they stumble and fall but they always get back up and try again. As we get older, it
seems that the desire to strive for perfection makes us too self-conscious to try new things. I, too, do
not like making mistakes; instead of learning from mistakes, I am usually left unhappy and ashamed of
my imperfection.
Francis, a sixty-two year old Cree man with the wonderful ability to laugh at himself, showed me
how important it is to accept our mistakes. Francis relies on his wheelchair because he has multiple
sclerosis, a condition where his immune system attacks the brain and spinal cord tissues (“Multiple
Sclerosis”). By dragging his feet on the ground he is able to maintain his own mobility while in his
wheelchair. He also completes his own personal care by crawling on the floor to get dressed in the
morning, go to the bathroom or go to the sink to brush his teeth.
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One of my favourite moments was watching Francis take fifteen minutes to put on his shirt. He
rolled on the floor laughing as he continued to put his shirt on backwards, then inside out, then
backwards and inside out. The room erupted in laughter as he muttered, “awh shit!” He never gave up
and eventually he managed to put his shirt on straight. I was amazed by his ability to be unaffected by
failure and mistakes. He simply persevered until he got the desired results.
“Eventually you get it right,” he laughed.
4. Being Happy With What You Have
In a world where keeping up with the latest trend is seen as not only important, but a way to be
happy, it is hard to be grateful for what you have. Billboards, commercials and internet pop-ups show
us the newest and greatest things that we can buy. I find myself constantly wanting more. As I walk by
people at the university, I compare myself to them; I find myself wishing I had their clothes, forgetting
that I already have a full closet. Too often, we forget how great life is.
Richard, a sixty-eight year old man with outstanding interpersonal skills, is someone who has
shown me what it looks like to be happy with what you have. A smile never leaves his face and he
always attempts to brighten the moods of those around him. His happy demeanor always finds a way to
make me see the positive side of any situation. His age has brought with it a wealth of knowledge and I
respect him, as if he were my grandparent.
Richard’s motto is, “still alive” and he says it to cheer up friends that look sad. He embraced this
motto after he was kicked by a horse on his farm, which resulted in an acquired brain injury. When I
asked him why he shares his motto with others he told me, “Every little bit helps. I could be sad. You
know I have lost my wife and sons. I do not even know their wives names and I have never met my
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grandchildren.” He pointed to his brain, letting me know his disability is why they do not have a
relationship.
I held onto his withered hand, wrinkled by time and wondered how such a beautiful man could
lose his family. “But I’m still thankful that I am alive. I think about what I have, not the other stuff,” he
said as he wiped the tears that rolled down his cheeks. He reached into his pocket and grabbed a deck
of cards and a grin reappeared on his face, “if I wasn’t alive I wouldn’t get to build a friendship with you.
By the way, I’m going to win.”
5. Small Acts of Kindness
Doing nice things for other people usually results in happiness. For instance, at Christmas when
you get a gift it is often less exciting than giving someone a gift that makes them shriek with joy. When
you do nice things for others you almost always end up benefiting; it can be knowledge gained, a
friendship started or just a feeling of warmth inside. Acts of kindness allow us to treat others the way
we would like to be treated and they add value to our lives.
Morgan, an eighteen year old beauty with perfectly white teeth and chestnut brown hair, takes
pride in helping others. Morgan was born with cerebral palsy, which involves abnormalities to the brain
and neuromuscular mobility impairment (“Cerebral Palsy”). She also has velocardiofacial syndrome,
which involves undeveloped thyroid glands, cardiovascular issues and heart problems (Horenstein et
al.). She is dependent on a wheelchair and cannot speak due to muscle tension. Her happiness and
feelings are expressed through helping others. Wiping drool from other camper’s faces, bringing
counsellors care supplies, handing out drinks at the supper table and holding her friend’s hands always
brings a smile to her face and gives Morgan her voice. Although her abilities are limited she uses her
remaining abilities to help others.
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I found out that twenty-one year old Jeffery was a highly intellectual person when he destroyed
me at Checkers, Chess and Risk. His twenty-six year old brother Gavin is into sci-fi movies and shares
the same intellect. Jeffery learned in his teens that his locomotors system would be weakened due to
muscular dystrophy (“Muscular Dystrophy”).
Gavin learned he had the degenerative disease,
Parkinson’s, which would attack his central nervous system (“Parkinson’s Disease”). The two brothers
were not born with their disabling diseases but they learned to cope with their circumstances by helping
each other.
“The diseases are affecting our lives. It was hard to handle at first. I took an accounting course,
but after I got sick I couldn’t work and participate in daily tasks,” Jeff confided in me, “but at the end of
the day I have to be grateful that I have a brother as my companion. My life isn’t what I thought it
would be but I still have lots to be thankful for.”
The two brothers act as a great support system for each other and constantly engage in little
acts of kindness. Jeff cuts Gavin’s food because his seizure disorder makes him shake violently. He is
also too blind to see; Jeff reads to him so that he can learn. In return, Gavin helps Jeff get on the toilet
and helps him with his mobility, due to the fact that Jeff is in a wheelchair. They work as a team and are
great, inseparable friends.
While walking behind Jeff in his wheelchair, Gavin stated, “I love Jeff and I’m glad to have
someone in my life that understands and goes through the same things I do. It makes us happy to do
nice things for each other.”
6. Conclusion
At a first glance, people may assume that my campers are unhappy because of their disabilities;
instead they model expletory happiness. They share positive attitudes and learn from their mistakes.
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They are happy for what they have and focus their efforts towards helping others. Their ability to
understand happiness as something deriving from good character allows them to look past the fallacy
that material goods are the most important thing in the world. Defining happiness and reflecting on our
lives is more important than ever because of the materialistic society that we live in. We are all faced
with unforeseen circumstances but we are able to choose how we deal with the situations; if we choose
to be positive the situation will be more easily handled. My campers have shown me that happiness is a
moral choice; every day we can choose to be nice to others and ourselves.
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Works Cited
Aristotle. “Nicomachean Ethics” (Terence Irwin, trans.), in Classics of Western Philosophy, 6th ed.
(Steven M. Cahn, ed.) (Indianapolis: Hackett Publishing Company, 2002): 260-312.
“Cerebral Palsy.” Wikipedia: The Free Encyclopedia. Wikimedia Foundation, Inc., 06 October 2012. Web.
07 October 2012.
Horenstein, S. M., Stuart Berger, et al. “Velocardiofacial Syndrom.” Medscape Reference. Web MD LCC,
29 February 2012. Web. 07 October 2012.
“Multiple Sclerosis.” Wikipedia: The Free Encyclopedia. Wikimedia Foundation, Inc., 07 October 2012.
Web. 07 October 2012.
“Muscular Dystrophy.” Wikipedia: The Free Encyclopedia. Wikimedia Foundation, Inc., 06 October 2012.
Web. 07 October 2012.
“Parkinson’s Disease.” Wikipedia: The Free Encyclopedia. Wikimedia Foundation, Inc., 01 October 2012.
Web. 07 October 2012.
“Spina Bifida.” Wikipedia: The Free Encyclopedia. Wikimedia Foundation, Inc., 27 September 2012. Web.
07 October 2012.