Why I Want a Wife
Judy Syfers
All work and no play makes a
housewife.
What is a wife?
• A wife is someone more special than words.
She's love mixed with friendship, and marriage
bonded with hope, thanks, and joy.
• A wife is beauty and lasting togetherness, and
there is no one more precious in the world.
• A wife is one who inspires some of the most
special moments two people have ever shared.
• A wife is a treasured perspective on the past,
a reassuring part of the present, and a million
wishes for all the days that lie ahead.
• A wife is a reminder of the blessings that
come from closeness.
• Sharing everything. Disclosing dreams.
Learning about life together.
• She's a hand within your hand.
• She's so often the only one who understands.
• A wife is understanding and trust enfolded
with love. She is a helper and a guide, and
• she is a feeling, deep inside, that makes you
realize, each and every day of your life
• ... that there is no one who could ever be
loved in the way a husband... loves his wife.
•
-Poem by C. Martin
Text I Why I Want a Wife
Pre-reading questions
1. What role does a wife usually play in a
traditional Chinese family? What role
does an American wife usually play in her
family? Are there any similarities or
differences between them?
2. Is there any change today in women’s
status in China and around the world?
About the text and the author
• Judy Syfers, born in 1937 in San Francisco,
is a feminist, political and environmental
activist, and a freelance writer. Her classic
satirical essay “ Why I Want a Wife” was
first published in Ms. Magazine in 1971 and
was widely circulated in the women’s
movement.
• The problems of American wives "stem from
a social system which places primary value o
n profits rather than on people’ s needs. As lo
ng as we continue to tolerate the system, we
will continue to be exploited as workers and
as wives."
Ms. Syfers received her B.F.A. in painting from the
University of lower in 1960. She wanted to go on to a
higher degree that would enable her to paint and to teach
in a university, but her (male) teachers advised that the
best she could hope for as a woman was teaching
in high school . Her reaction was to drop school, get
married, and have two children. Thus the present piece,
which appeared in the Spring 1972 preview issue of Ms.,
arises from real experience.
1937出生于旧金山的朱迪·赛菲丝（Judy Syfers）
认为美国妻子的根本问题是:"美国社会的主流
价值观看重利益而不尊重人们的需要。只要我
们继续容忍这种社会制度，我们就会继续被当
作劳工和妻子遭受剥削。"赛菲丝夫人于1960
年获爱荷华 州立大学美术学绘画专业学士学
位。她想继续深造获取更高学位，希望一边画
画一边在大学教书。她的（男）同事建议，作
为一个女人，最好是在中等教育水平的学校执
教。但她根本不听，很快就结婚、生子......
Text analysis
The writer uses a simple, straightforward style.
By mentioning her encounter with a male
friend of hers “fresh from a recent divorce,”
she introduces her major proposition —
wives are taken for granted. Then she
supports the argument with seemingly trivial
things from daily life, which are carefully
arranged so as to contribute to the conclusion.
The essay ends with a crisp, one-sentence
rhetorical question.
Paragraph 1-2
• The writer introduces her identity in the first
paragraph and starts her bitter satire, in the
second paragraph, on those men desiring for
a wife who fits in with their ideal notions by
pretending that she would like to have a
wife with all possible virtues. Here are
some questions to consider:
Structure analysis of the text
• Paragraph 3-7
• Here Syfers divides a wife's duties and
responsibilities into various functions or
services according to the ideal notions most
men are likely to have for a wife.
• Paragraph 8-9
• The writer states a wife’s status in a family.
Rhetorical features of the text
• Similar sentence pattern— “I want a wife
who…”—repetition
It helps to display a sense of necessity and
even urgency of having a wife. Here it is
used to support the idea forcefully. (the idea
that “I want a wife”). It also can be used to
make a smooth and natural transition.
Comprehension questions (1)
• Q1: How does the author account for family
duties and household chores in a specific
way? Sum them up and illustrate them with
examples of your own.
• Household chores are broken down into
three parts according to the husband’s needs.
They are looking after his children, meeting
his physical needs, and taking care of his
social life. First, the wife is supposed to be
the nurturing mother of his children-for
instance, she has to take leave to nurse the
sick child though she cannot lose her job.
• Second, the wife must meet the husband’s
physical needs such as washing, cleaning,
cooking, and she has to be on his beside
when he is sick. Third, she must never
overlook her duty for her husband’s social
life. All these chores are for the benefit of
the husband.
• Q2: What is a wife supposed to attend to in
taking care of a child?
• According to Syfers, a wife has to take sole
charge of child care while working. She has
to feed the children properly and keep them
clean; she has to arrange for their schooling
and take care of their social life;
• she has to keep close track of their medical
care and lose time at work when needed to
take care of the sick child though she cannot
lose her job. In a word, she has to be a fulltime mother to her children. As for the
father, his role and duty can be overlooked.
• Q3: What social duties is a wife required to
assume according to the author?
• According to Syfers, a wife’s social duties
are all directed towards the success of the
husband’s social life. She has to make
arrangements so that the children won’t be
in the way when they have a night out or
have guests home.
• She has to clean the house, prepare special
meals, and attend to the needs of every
guest so that they will feel comfortable.
Apart from that, she has to understand and
accept the fact sometimes her husband
needs a night out by himself. As for the
wife’s own social life, Syfers mentions
nothing, which implies the wife should have
no social life of her own at all.
• Q4: What does the author say, both explicitly and
implicitly, about divorce?
• The essay implies that a man or only a man is at
liberty to file for a divorce so as to replace the old
wife with a new one. A man comes out of a
divorce free and fresh while a woman has to take
the pain and responsibility to take care of their
children solely.
• Q5 What makes Syfers think about the topic
of wanting a wife?
Her recent encounter with a friend of hers
who has just had a divorce and is looking
for another wife.
Language points
incidentally:
• in a way that was not planned,
but as a result of something else.
Eg. Quite incidentally , I got some
information at the party.
• by the way
Eg. I must go now, incidentally, can
you look after my dog?
“…fresh from a recent divorce”
Just divorced with his wife not long ago
It occurred to sb that…
Eg. The idea never occurred to me.
It just occurred to me that if we want
to have dinner in that restaurant we’d
better make reservation in advance.
if need be : if necessary
• We will come to your help if need be.
• If need be, I can come early tomorrow.
see (to it) that: make sure
• See to it that it gets done right away.
“ I want a wife to keep track of the
children’s doctor and dentist
appointments.”
I want a wife who can accurately
remember the appointments with
children’s doctor and dentist and
contact them on time.
sympathize with sb.
They sympathize with those children who
have lost their homes.
sympathetic adj.
sympathy n.
rambling: (of a speech, writing) disordered
and wandering
• This is really a rambling essay.
• I've just had this rambling, incoherent letter
from my sister.
• Her actions were accompanied by a
rambling monologue.
• hors d'oeuvres: appetizer before meal
& savory food served in small amounts at the
beginning of a meal
• replenish : to fill up again
Eg. Food stocks should be replenished every
morning before opening.
The music will replenish my weary soul.
clutter up : to make untidy or confused,
especially by filling with useless or
unwanted things
• The room was cluttered up with rubbish.
• She says she deliberately tries not to clutter
up her mind.
“…that my sexual needs may entail more than strict
adherence to monogamy.”
My needs in sex may make me break through
monogamy.
entail : to make (an event or action) necessary; to
involve
• Repairing the roof will entail spending a lot of
money.
• Writing a book entails a lot of work.
adherence to : acting in accordance (with
something); following (something)
• He was known for his strict adherence to
the rules.
• Adherence to the rule of law is a very
important principle.
monogamy : the custom or practice of having
only one wife or husband at one time
Polygamy 一夫多妻
Polyandry 一妻多夫
• Mono- (pref): one, single
Eg. monologue/ monolingual
Translation exercises
• 这个公司主要是由刚刚从学校毕业的年轻人组
成的。（fresh from）
• This company is mostly composed of young
people fresh from school.
• 我从未想到他会做这种事情。(it occurs to
someone that)
• It never occurred to me that he would ever do such
a thing.
• 在必要时，我会尽力去说服他的。( if
need be)
• I’ll try my best to persuade him if need be.
• 毕业后，我要与同学保持联系很困难。
(keep track)
• It is difficult to keep track of my fellow
students after graduation.
• 谁将负责宴席后的甜食？(see to)
• Who is going to see to the desserts after dinner?
• 不要用这种琐碎的小事去烦你的上司。
(bother…with)
• Don’t bother your boss with such trifles.
• 我的工作是不时的补充库存。(replenish)
• My work was to replenish our stock time and
again.
• 他经常把书房搞得乱七八糟。 (clutter up)
• He often clutters up his study.
Oral work
• Role play an interview with a “typical” wife
as is described in the text. Let the wife
voice what she thinks about her duty for her
family and her husband. What does she
think of her life as a whole, her happiness,
and her wishes?
Copy the writing of Judy Syfers’ “I want a
wife”, and write a composition of about 350
words on the following topic: I want a
husband
I want a husband
I want a husband so that I don’t have to
worry about buying an apartment. Because
it’s the guy’s responsibility to provide a
shelter. Guys are expected to get everything
ready before they can pop the question.
With this big problem left to the husband, I
can enjoy my life. I want to “shop till I drop”
--- with my husband’s money. If he fails to
earn big bucks, I will feel I have been
shortchanged by life and regret my choice.
How come I chose to be with him when I
had a whole bunch of candidates around?
I sacrifice the wood for him, the tree. So he
should know better about that. Even if I
whine, my husband should be a good
listener. Women have the right to complain,
and men don’t. His job is to prevent the
excuses of women’s complaint.
I want a husband, a presentable one, so that when I
go out on social occasions, I won’t feel dwarfed
by other women. My husband is either a rich
businessman or a powerful official. Anyway to a
certain degree, these two are the same. Money
buys power and power brings money. Or if he
happens to be neither of these two types, he should
at least be rich in mind, with a degree that will
intimidate other women’s husbands of course.
I want a husband who will take care of the
housework. According to the new standards,
a good husband is one who is not only a
breadwinner, but also a good housekeeper.
He should make sure that when I get up,
breakfast is ready. When the meals are
finished, the dishes are done. If we have
kids, he will be the one who read bedside
stories.
If I say something wrong, he is
supposed to say “ It’s not that you are
wrong, but that I heard it wrong” to make
me feel better. If I want to watch TV, he is
supposed to give up his football game and
give me the remote control.
If I am out with my girl friends, he is
supposed to keep track of me and pick me
up when I feel like going back.
• I want a husband who remembers every important
date in our life. The anniversaries for our first date
and our wedding, Women’s Day, Teacher’s Day,
Christmas, New Year’s Day, Valentine’s Day
should be at his fingertips. He will always get
presents ready. He should also know how to renew
romantic touch in marriage, so he cannot repeat
doing the same thing and send me the same gifts
year after year. I need him to “learn new tricks”,
no matter how old he is.