WRITING EFFECTIVE LEADS Information from https://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/735/05/ and http://cubreporters.org/leads.html The lead, or opening paragraph, is the most important part of a news story. It… grabs interest gives readers the most important information is clear, concise and interesting establishes the voice and direction of an article Tips for Writing a Lead The Five W’s and H: Before writing a lead, decide which aspect of the story – who, what, when, where, why, how – is most important. You should emphasize those aspects in your lead. Wait to explain less important aspects until the second or third sentence. Conflict: Good stories have conflict. So do many good leads. Specificity: Though you are essentially summarizing information in most leads, try to be specific as possible. If your lead is too broad, it won’t be informative or interesting. Brevity: Readers want to know why the story matters to them and they won’t wait long for the answer. Leads are often one sentence, sometimes two. Generally, they are 25 to 30 words and should rarely be more than 40. Active sentences: Strong verbs will make your lead lively and interesting. Passive constructions, on the other hand, can sound dull and leave out important information, such as the person or thing that caused the action. Incomplete reporting is often a source of passive leads. Audience and context: Take into account what your reader already knows. Remember that in today’s media culture, most readers become aware of breaking news as it happens. If you’re writing for a print publication the next day, your lead should do more than merely regurgitate yesterday’s news. Honesty: A lead is an implicit promise to your readers. You must be able to deliver what you promise in your lead. What to Avoid Flowery language: Many beginning writers make the mistake of overusing adverbs and adjectives in their leads. Concentrate instead on using strong verbs and nouns. Unnecessary words or phrases: Watch out for unintentional redundancy. For example, 2 p.m. Wednesday afternoon, or very unique. You can’t afford to waste space in a news story, especially in the lead. Avoid clutter and cut right to the heart of the story. Formulaic leads: Because a lot of news writing is done on deadline, the temptation to write tired leads is strong. Resist it. Readers want information, but they also want to be entertained. Your lead must sound genuine, not merely mechanical. It: Most editors frown on leads that begin with the word it because it is not precise and disorients the reader. Types of Leads Summary Anecdotal Question Quotation Single-Item Delayed Identification Creative Fragment (Single Sentence) Analogy Wordplay Scenic Storytelling Amazing Fact/Startling Statement Opposite List Summary Lead This is perhaps the most traditional lead in news writing. It is often used for breaking news. A story about a city council vote might use this “just the facts” approach. Straight news leads tend to provide answers to the most important three or four of the Five W’s and H. Historically this type of lead has been used to convey who, what, when and where. But in today’s fast-paced media atmosphere, a straightforward recitation of who, what, when and where can sound stale by the time a newspaper hits the stands. Some newspapers are adjusting to this reality by posting breaking news online as it happens and filling the print edition with more evaluative and analytical stories focused on why and how. Leads should reflect this. EXAMPLES: County administrator faces ouster By Tony Cook for The Cincinnati Post, Jan. 14, 2005 Two Hamilton County Commissioners plan to force the county’s top administrator out of office today. Commentary: This lead addresses the traditional who, what and when. If this information had been reported on TV or radio the day before, this lead might not be a good one for the print edition of the newspaper; however, if the reporter had an exclusive or posted this information online as soon as it became available, then this lead would make sense. Note that it is brief (15 words) and uses an active sentence construction. Anecdotal Lead Sometimes, beginning a story with a quick anecdote can draw in readers. The anecdote must be interesting and must closely illustrate the article’s broader point. If you use this approach, specificity and concrete detail are essential and the broader significance of the anecdote should be explained within the first few sentences following the lead. EXAMPLE: Tri-staters tell stories of the devastating tsunami By Tony Cook for The Cincinnati Post, Jan. 8, 2005 From Dan Ralescu’s sun-warmed beach chair in Thailand, the Indian Ocean began to look, oddly, not so much like waves but bread dough. Commentary: This article is a local angle on the devastating tsunami that struck Southeast Asia in 2005. As a result of the massive death toll and worldwide impact, most readers would have been inundated with basic information about the tsunami. Given that context, this lead uses an unexpected image to capture the reader’s attention and prepare them for a new take on the tsunami. Again, it is brief (23 words). Question/Quotation Lead Other types of leads: A large number of other approaches exist, and writers should not feel boxed in by formulas. That said, beginning writers can abuse certain kinds of leads. These include leads that begin with a question or direct quotation and those that make a direct appeal using the word you. While such leads might be appropriate in some circumstances, use them sparsely and cautiously. EXAMPLE: Same lobbyist for courts, shorter term, more money By Tony Cook for the Las Vegas Sun, June 29, 2008 What’s increasing faster than the price of gasoline? Apparently, the cost of court lobbyists. District and Justice Court Judges want to hire lobbyist Rick Loop for $150,000 to represent the court system in Carson City through the 2009 legislative session. During the past session, Loop’s price tag was $80,000. Commentary: Question leads can be useful in grabbing attention, but they are rarely as effective as other types of leads in terms of clearly and concisely providing the main point of a story. In this case, the second paragraph must carry a lot of the weight that would normally be handled in the lead. More Examples Summary Lead ___The summary lead is the most traditional lead in a journalism article. It is to the point and factual. It's meant to give a reader a quick summary of the story in as few words as possible (should be 30 words or less), usually in one sentence. It contains the essence of the story (i.e. the most important, but not necessarily all, of the 5 Ws and H -- who, what, when, where, why and how). It cites the source of any opinions. ___For example, I frequently used this approach when I covered breaking news for a wire service: __WASHINGTON -- Federal Reserve Chairman Alan Greenspan told Congress yesterday that U.S. economic growth appeared to be slowing, heading off for the moment any need to raise interest rates. Wall Street responded with a cheer, sending stocks and bonds soaring. Single-Item Lead ___This lead focuses on just one or two elements of a summary lead for a bigger punch. For instance, when the Philadelphia Phillies won the 2008 World Series, their first championship since 1980, a story posted online by the Associated Press began with this single-item lead: __The Philadelphia Phillies are World Champions again. ___As opposed to this typical summary lead, which Reuters used: __The Philadelphia Phillies ended their long wait for a World Series title with a short burst of baseball last night as they clinched the crown by completing a rain-suspended 4-3 win over the Tampa Bay Rays. Delayed Identification Lead ___Sometimes with summary leads, you don't always want to clearly identify the subject (or the who) right away. In the above examples, the who -- Alan Greenspan and the Phillies -- were identified because they were really essential elements of the story. People don't just want to hear that a baseball team won a championship - they want to know which team. Similarly, when the Federal Reserve chairman speaks, people listen. ___Often, however, the subject doesn't have much name recognition, nor do readers care all that much about the subject's name. So, use a descriptive pronoun to identify the person in the lead. Provide his specific name and title in a later paragraph. __LINCOLN, R.I. -- A School Committee member has filed an assault complaint against a fellow member, accusing her of grabbing her nose and twisting it following an executive session Thursday night. __Patricia A. Iannelli yesterday alleged in an interview that fellow committee member Lucille J. Mandeville "grabbed my nose and proceeded to twist my nose" following a rancorous discussion during a closed-door School Committee meeting. Creative Lead ___Unless you're writing hard news for a daily newspaper or regularly-updated website, the summary lead just doesn't reel in readers. You need to take a more creative approach. Consider this summary lead: __A late spring snowstorm surprised forecasters and drivers Tuesday afternoon, triggering more than 30 accidents, Cleveland police officials said. A more creative idea might be… Short Sentence/Fragment Lead ___This lead uses one word or a short phrase as a teaser for the rest of the lead. Readers may find this gimmicky, so use this approach sparingly. Here's an example: __One-fifth of an inch. __That's all the snow it took to trigger more than 30 accidents on local roads yesterday as a late spring storm snuck up on Cleveland motorists. Analogy Lead ___This lead makes a comparison between an issue or event you're writing about and something more familiar to the average reader. This approach can work well when you have a complex or foreign matter you want to explain in laymen's terms. Consider: __AMSTERDAM -- The Netherlands is considering antiterrorism laws that make the United States' Patriot Act look like a civil libertarian's dream come true. Wordplay Lead ___This lead involves a clever turn of phrase, name or word. Be careful using this lead because it can mislead the reader. The reader may think your story is about one thing and then discover it's about something else and get annoyed. ___ But I think a wordplay lead approach works for this next example, excerpted from a story I wrote about a fire at a costume store. Because the fire happened late at night, it didn't get newspaper coverage until two days later, at which point it wasn't breaking news and a summary lead wouldn't have worked well. __PAWTUCKET, R.I. -- Bill Clinton will finally get taken to the cleaners. __So will Dracula and a Playboy bunny. __The three are among some 6,000 smoke-damaged costumes that will visit dry cleaners in the next few days, because of a fire that broke out Wednesday night at Morris Novelty, a popular costume and novelty store. Scenic Lead ___This lead begins with a description of the scene surrounding an event. It is typically used for stories in which the setting is prominent, such as stories about festive events, performances and sports. It can also be used to strike a mood appropriate for the story. ___One of my students used such an approach for her profile story, which was published in the Asbury Park Press -- and it worked well. As the youngest member of a prestigious ballet group, her subject's typical work day is atypical for an 18-year-old. So, she began her story by describing a scene from the teenage ballerina's work day. __The lights shine down and the music surrounds her as she spins across the stage into the arms of her partner. The audience roars its approval as the music slows and the curtains begin to close. __It's the end of just another workday for teenager Chelsea Rittenhouse. __At 18, the Howell resident is the youngest member of the New York Theater Ballet, which describes itself as the most widely seen chamber ballet company in the United States. The professional group also tours abroad. Storytelling Lead ___Using a narrative style, begin by introducing the main characters, the conflict, and perhaps the setting of the story. Make readers feel the drama and want to know what's going to happen next. Wall Street Journal reporter Angelo Henderson used this approach to begin his Pulitzer Prizewinning article about a pharmacist who is driven to violence by his encounters with armed robbery: __DETROIT -- "Get on the ground," a man holding a gun screamed. "I'll blow your heads off if you move." __Dennis Grehl and a co-worker complied. Dreamlike, he found himself lying face down on a cold, gritty black-tile floor, a pistol against the back of his head. __"Please, mister, don't make me shoot you," a second gunman threatened. __A crazy memory: tiny specks of light floating in the tile; that, and the paralyzing weight of helplessness. __Mr. Grehl is a pharmacist, unassuming, mild mannered. A family man with a wife and a daughter. __He was being robbed. Amazing Fact Lead ___Open with an amazing fact that arouses readers interest, such as: __WASHINGTON -- Sixty percent of Americans oppose the U.S. war in Iraq, the highest number since polling on the subject began with the commencement of the war in March 2003, according to poll results and trends released Wednesday. (CNN) Startling Statement Lead ___Open with a startling statement that arouses reader interest. When I was assigned to write an anniversary story about a widely-publicized murder, I knew I'd need a unique angle if I was going to get people to read about someone whom they'd already heard a lot about. So, I began my story with a startling statement: __LINCOLN, R.I. -- The first thing Elizabeth Moon sees in the morning is the room where her father was beaten to death. __It was one year ago yesterday that she and this bucolic town were stunned by the brutal and still unsolved murder of Dr. Alfred C. Moon. The radiologist's naked body was found in his bed, bludgeoned with a lamp. __According to an autopsy report, the medical pioneer who brought the CAT scan to Rhode Island died from "blunt force deforming-type trauma" so severe that he had to be identified by dental records. __Elizabeth Moon acknowledges that many people think it's "creepy" that her family lives in the house where it happened. To her, the light gray house with aqua shutters on Briarwood Road is not where her father died, but the place where he lived. Opposite Lead ___Cite first one point of view or observation and then follow with the opposite view, like this: __Facebook rots the brain, according to a report by a Stansbury University psychology professor. Jim Wallace, honors student and an avid user of the popular website, says that just isn't true. List Lead ___Sometimes instead of focusing on just one person, place or thing, you want to impress the reader with a longer list. Consider this next example, which comes from a story I wrote for the Arizona Republic about the growing popularity of general aviation in Phoenix. Because of the diversity of examples, many readers probably can identify with at least one of the pilots: __Whenever sixth-grader Vasil Evanoff has a day off from school, he hops into a Cessna 152 and takes to the skies. __On weekends, Sue Sumner likes to fly her grandson around the Valley, just to see the sights. __There's a special restaurant that funeral director Lincoln Ragsdale Jr. likes to visit for breakfast, but it's 115 miles away from home. He climbs in his Beech Bonanza A-36, and an hour later, he's eating pancakes in Sedona. __Evanoff, Sumner and Ragsdale are among the growing numbers of Arizonans piloting small airplanes.