Honors March 6, 2012
• 10 minutes to study for Unit 12 Quiz
• Take Unit 12 Quiz
• Writing Thesis Statements
– Thesis/intro paragraph writing activity
– Work on first draft of thesis statement AND intro paragraph
• Get Macbeth Final Assessment
HW due THURSDAY:
• 2nd draft thesis statement/introduction
• 1st draft of bibliography
• Print out at least two sources each about your assigned
psychological condition
CP March 6th and 7th
• 10 minutes to study for Unit 12 Quiz
• Take Unit 12 Quiz
• Writing Thesis Statements
– Thesis/intro paragraph writing activity
– Work on first draft of thesis statement AND intro
paragraph
HW due THURSDAY or FRIDAY – 2nd draft thesis
statement/introduction and 1st draft of
bibliography
Thesis Statement and
Introduction Paragraphs…
A $5 guide and guarantee
Why do we write thesis statements?
• Because it sets the tone for the whole essay
by introducing key points and providing the
reader with purpose and direction.
Why do we write GOOD thesis
statements?
• Because people are impatient, lazy, and value their time, and
therefore, will not want to waste their time while you ramble on and
do not get to the point. Teachers may fail you or take off points for
poor thesis statements. Bosses might fire you for not being clear or for
not giving them what they ask for. Your peers will ridicule you.
Think – have you ever asked the following?
• What’s the point? When will I ever need this?
Think – have you ever said the following?
• This is so frustrating, you’re not telling me anything.
So in a nutshell…
Thesis statements are important because we
crave instant gratification and do not want to
think or work too hard to get information.
Hello, I’m Mr. Lin
And when I’m not grading your work, I am hanging
out with the Ruff Ryders and riding tricycles. When
you write good thesis statements, I have more time
to do those things! YAY!!!!!!
When you don’t write good thesis statements,
this is what I read, grade, and think…
What the heck was the point of this story @!^#*$(%)#&!!@$$#???
What I want to write on your paper…
… but that would take too long. So? F
So how do we fix this?
Here are 5 Steps to Writing a Good Thesis:
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
Be Focused
Be Specific
Be Debatable
Be Supportable
Be Concise
Be Focused.
• What is your topic? Make sure that you
understand your topic fully and know what
information you need to provide as background
in order to explain what you want or need to in
order to back up your points.
If I were talking about ultimate frisbee and said
‘huck’, ‘poach’, ‘sky’… would you know what I’m
talking about? Probably not. So my first task
when coming up with my thesis is to keep
technical words (jargon) to a minimum but make
a mental note that I need to explain them later
on in my research. They are important overall,
but not currently in the thesis.
Be Specific.
• Building off of being focused, think about your
topic and make sure that you are using language
and words that doesn’t leave your audience in
the dark.
• Think like a current event: who, what, where,
when, how, why.
• This isn’t “Mad Libs” so don’t just throw any word
or term out there, unless you plan on explaining
it later on in the body of your essay.
Example Thesis: Brodie Smith is currently the best
player in the nation.
What’s wrong here?
Example Thesis: Brodie Smith is
currently the best player in the nation.
•
•
Not specific enough…
– Who is he and/or what sport does he
play?
– What makes him the best player?
Without going into too much detail, a better
thesis statement would answer these
questions.
Revision 1:
Brodie Smith is currently the best ultimate
frisbee player in the nation for many reasons.
Revision 2:
Brodie Smith is currently the best ultimate
frisbee player in the nation because he has
the best throws and plays the best defense.
Is this perfect though? No. Better?
YES.
Be Debatable.
• Your thesis statement cannot be
a fact. If it’s a fact then why do I
need to read 3+ pages about it
when you can answer it in one
sentence?
Example Thesis: The American flag
is red, white, and blue. It just is.
Why it isn’t good? It doesn’t prove
anything nor promise to give me
any greater insights.
Be Supportable.
• Your thesis statement must also be
provable based on real evidence and
not just opinion.
Example Thesis: Everyone thinks that
Taylor Swift is the sexiest, most
talented, and greatest human being
ever.
Can I prove this? Maybe by a poll or
survey BUT can I prove that everyone
thinks this? Also, what does “being
the greatest human being ever”
mean?
Avoid words that are extreme
(everybody, nobody, all, never).
Be Concise.
Avoid lengthy explanations, summary, excessive wordiness, usage of big words,
metaphors, similes, etc. Simply say what you mean. You have the rest of your paper to
‘wow’ me. For now, I just need to know if you have an intelligent thought and if you can
explain it.
Now Let’s Write Our Thesis Statements
Brainstorm the topic.
• Let’s say that your class focuses upon the
problems posed by changes in the dietary habits
of Americans. You find that you are interested in
the amount of sugar Americans consume.
• You start out with a thesis statement like this:
Sugar consumption.
• This fragment isn’t a thesis statement. Instead, it
simply indicates a general subject. Furthermore,
your reader doesn’t know what you want to say
about sugar consumption.
Narrow the topic.
Your readings about the topic, however, have led you to the
conclusion that elementary school children are consuming
far more sugar than is healthy.
• You change your thesis to look like this:
Reducing sugar consumption by elementary school children.
• This fragment not only announces your subject, but it
focuses on one segment of the population: elementary
school children. Furthermore, it raises a subject upon which
reasonable people could disagree, because while most
people might agree that children consume more sugar than
they used to, not everyone would agree on what should be
done or who should do it. You should note that this
fragment is not a thesis statement because your reader
doesn’t know your conclusions on the topic.
Take a position on the topic.
• After reflecting on the topic a little while longer,
you decide that what you really want to say
about this topic is that something should be done
to reduce the amount of sugar these children
consume.
• You revise your thesis statement to look like this:
More attention should be paid to the food and
beverage choices available to elementary school
children.
• This statement asserts your position, but the
terms more attention and food and beverage
choices are vague.
Use specific language.
• You decide to explain what you mean
about food and beverage choices, so you
write:
Experts estimate that half of elementary school
children consume nine times the
recommended daily allowance of sugar.
• This statement is specific, but it isn’t a thesis.
It merely reports a statistic instead of making
an assertion.
Make an assertion based on clearly stated support.
• You finally revise your thesis statement one more time
to look like this:
Because half of all American elementary school children
consume nine times the recommended daily
allowance of sugar, schools should be required to
replace the beverages in soda machines with healthy
alternatives.
• Notice how the thesis answers the question, “What
should be done to reduce sugar consumption by
children, and who should do it?” When you started
thinking about the paper, you may not have had a
specific question in mind, but as you became more
involved in the topic, your ideas became more specific.
Your thesis changed to reflect your new insights.
Let’s Review
What is a thesis statement?
• A sentence or two that serves to guide your argument, making it easier for
a reader to understand the information and purpose of your paper or
essay
A good thesis statement will usually:
• take on a subject upon which reasonable people could disagree
• deal with a subject that can be adequately treated given the nature of the
assignment
• express one main idea
• assert your conclusions about a subject
And lastly, a good thesis will follow these 5 simple rules
1. Be Focused
2. Be Specific
3. Be Debatable
4. Be Supportable
5. Be Concise