Review
Last week we began chapter 13, the love chapter, by seeing God’s perspective of love
To God, love is supreme
It is who He is – His essence, it is the motivation behind all He does and it is our earmark, that which is to identify us as disciples
To illustrate love’s importance, Paul gave us 3 examples the stress the need for love
Without love, our most eloquent communications is little more than noise
Without love, all our giftings, talents & abilities are of no benefit
Without love, all our acts of service or sacrifice profit us nothing
We mentioned that the love God is concerned with is agape love
That selfless, other’s centered, unmerited, unearned, undeserved love
Love that simply seeks an object to lavish it’s affection on
It loves by choice of the lover, regardless of the beloved
The conduct, response or attitude of the beloved has no effect on the love given
The love of a mother for her newborn child
Introduction
After expounding on the importance of love, how we are basically noisy worthless nothings without it, it would be terrible if Paul simply moved on to the next subject without describing that love
Love’s important, now go figure out what love is on your own
Most of us would be in big trouble, with at best tweaked definition of love
Some of us didn’t really grow up with love, or at least not how God defines it
Left to our own devices, our definition of love would be different from what God desires
Thankfully Paul doesn’t do that
In verse 4-8 Paul defines the agape God love
Like facets on a diamond, Paul lists 16 characteristics of agape love
They describe what this love looks like, how it acts, how it responds, it’s attitude and it’s applications
According to 1 John, God is agape love
In reality, Paul definition of love in these verses also serves as a definition of God
It shows us who He is at His core
Best of all, it tells us how God loves us
We know He loves us, but often we feel His love fluctuates based on our performance
As we’ll see, this love has nothing to do with the performance of it’s object
As such, please know that God loves us in spite of us
Our performance is actually a response to His love, rather than the motivation of His love
These verses are not intended to be some kind of indictment to condemn us as loveless
Actually, there really should be an encouragement to all of us
First, they tells us the character and nature of the God we serve
Second, they show us the kind of love that God has for us
Third, they depict the love that that Spirit is working into us
These verses become a measuring stick, a standard that we can compare our lives to
Substitute your name every time you see the word love and reread these verses
Would these verses remain true? Or does the Spirit still have a lot of work to do?
The longer we walk with the Lord and surrender to the sanctifying work of the Spirit, the truer they should sound
As such, we can use these verse as a progress meter of our sanctification
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Now substitute Jesus’ name for love and reread the verses
It fits perfectly and doesn’t detract from the truthfulness of the verse at all
My prayer, for me & you, is that these verses come to describe us more and more each day
The Definition of Love (13:4-8a)
First, we are told that agape love suffers long
Most of us tend to avoid anything with the word suffer in it
Agape love is more than just patient, it suffers long, it patiently endures
It endures and bears with wrongdoing for an extended period of time
There is a ‘stick-to-it-ness’ about it
It is not quick to drop it’s object of affection at the first sign of difficulty or problems
It doesn’t give up quickly
So many times our love is conditional
What have you done for me lately?
If the answer is very little, or worse yet caused me to suffer, we are quick to drop our love
Agape love is about committed faithfulness regardless of the situation
This also conveys the idea is that it is not quick tempered, fast to react negatively
Agape love is far from wrath or anger
When we perceive we have been wronged, rather that suffer long and endure it, we are quick to want to retaliate, usually in a negative way
That is not the way of agape – it is able to rise above petty things and continue to love
How perfect a definition of God
Aren’t you glad that God was longsuffering with you before you got saved?
Aren’t you glad that now that you are saved, He continues to be long suffering with your failures and when you deliberately sin against Him
Aren’t you glad that God never did, nor will, give up on you? –
Phil 1:6 “…being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ”
God is indeed longsuffering
When Moses wanted to see God, God passed by and declared His name to Moses
Ex 34:6-7 “And the LORD passed before him and proclaimed, "The LORD, the LORD God, merciful and gracious, longsuffering, and abounding in goodness and truth, keeping mercy for thousands, forgiving iniquity and transgression and sin…”
Peter even addressed the issue that some felt God was unconcerned because He didn’t bring His judgment swiftly – 2 Peter 3:9 “The Lord is not slack concerning His promise, as some count slackness, but is longsuffering toward us, not willing that any should perish but that all should come to repentance.”
Is our love longsuffering or is it simply fair weathered and self benefit orientated
Second, agape love is kind
The best description of this kindness is actually tender compassion
Compassion is more that just feeling sorry for someone or identifying with their situation and suffering
Compassion carries with it a strong desire to intervene to alleviate that suffering
In other words, it doesn’t simply shake it’s head and say what a shame, it actively looks for ways to improve the situation
The word comes from the same root word for bowels – what the ancients believed was the seat of all emotions, in the pit of your stomach
The bible sometimes renders the word as tender mercy
Not only does love suffer long, it responds with active kindness
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Agape love is always seeking an opportunity to be kind and tender
It wants to be an asset, a help, a benefit to those upon whom it is given
No matter what or how much it must endure and suffer, agape love always seeks to be good and kind to others
Naturally speaking, when we are wronged, kindness isn’t usually on the top of our response list
Luke 6:35-36 “But love your enemies, do good, and lend, hoping for nothing in return; and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High. For He is kind to the unthankful and evil. Therefore be merciful, just as your Father also is merciful.”
Needless to say, this describes God perfectly
God is not some malevolent and maniacal being looking to pour out His anger or wrath
He is the opposite – loving tender and always seeking to pour out His kindness and compassion
Look at His response to sin
He didn’t look down, shake His head and say too bad for you
He sent His Son to alleviate the problem
Titus 3:4-7 “But when the kindness and the love of God our Savior toward man appeared, not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to His mercy He saved us, through the washing of regeneration and renewing of the Holy Spirit, whom He poured out on us abundantly through Jesus Christ our Savior, that having been justified by His grace we should become heirs according to the hope of eternal life.”
Throughout the gospels we read; ‘Jesus had compassion for the people’ or ‘Jesus was moved with compassion’
He looked at the multitudes with compassion because He saw them as sheep without a shepherd
Do we always respond in kindness?
Third, agape love does not envy
Envy is a desire for what another has or is – similar to coveting
There are 2 types of envy
Simple envy – you have it I want it
Malicious envy – you have it, I don’t necessarily want it, I just don’t want you to have it
This quality means that love is not jealous
True love has an aspect of contentment
It doesn’t have a wrong sense of ambition or competition
Within the body it doesn’t look upon the call, gifts or influence of others with a sense of jealousy or covetousness
Jealousy is an insidious thing and is often called ‘the green-eyed monster’
When I think of envy, I think of king Saul
He was so envious and jealous of David
It infuriated him when the people sang of Saul killing his 1,000’s but David his 10,000’s
So strong was his envy, that it moved Saul to chase David around the wilderness for years looking to kill him
When Jesus died, what possessions did He have
Nothing – even His clothes were gambled away
He had to be buried in a borrowed tomb
When approached by a potential disciple Jesus responded in Matt 8:19-20 “Then a certain scribe came and said to Him, "Teacher, I will follow You wherever You go." And Jesus said to him,
"Foxes have holes and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has nowhere to lay His head."”
But doesn’t the bible say that our God is a jealous God and that His name is Jealous
Yes – but God is jealous for us, not of us
He is jealous that we serve Him alone, because He knows that is what is best for us
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Fourth, agape love does not parade itself
The old KJV says ‘charity vaunteth not itself’
To vaunt means to push forward or push up
Love doesn’t do what it does to be seen, to be elevated in the eyes of others
I wish some of the TV Christians would understand this
The idea is that love isn’t some kind external show
It is genuine, not an act for others to see and admire
It isn’t a braggart – It doesn’t need to be the center of attention, nor does it need or seek applause
In actuality, love most often does it’s work outside of the sight of others
We see this demonstrated in the life of Jesus
He was never seeking the crowds, in fact He often withdrew from them
When He did His miracles, He often said ‘don’t tell anyone’
After He raised Jairus’ daughter from the dead we read in Luke 8:56 “And her parents were astonished, but He charged them to tell no one what had happened.”
He wasn’t out campaigning for the popular vote
Our love isn’t to be demonstrated in such a way that we are seeking to build up our image in the eyes of others
Fifth, love is not puffed up
Here we have the internal attitude of pride
Pride is something we all have and struggle with – something we must fight against
It was the 1 st
sin, the sin of Lucifer, and is really the genesis of every other sin
Pride is simply seeing yourself as above others
With that comes the need and attempt to prove that
When this is the case, then any charitable deeds are done for an ego stroke
Look what I did, boy and I great, I’m so much better than so and so because they didn’t do what I did
This manifestation of love is really selfish in nature
Plain and simple – God hates pride
Both James & Peter tell us that “God resists the proud but gives grace to the humble”
Humility is really a fundamental cornerstone of the Christian life
Sixth, agape love does not act rudely
It is not short, curt or terse
It is always polite, showing common courtesy
Seventh, love does not seek it’s own
True love doesn’t act based on what it can get for itself
It is not selfish, self-centered or self-seeking
Agape is always looking out for the benefit of others
It is willing to give others the credit
Agape is all about giving, not taking
Eighth, agape love is not provoked
Some people add the word ‘easily’ before provoked
The idea is that there is a limit, a line not to cross
Once crossed, then love is provoked
That is not what the bible says
Here we have the idea of not being over sensitive
Love isn’t touchy, easily offended or easily frustrated
Love has that staying endurance we talked about, and doesn’t give up in a huff
Agape love has thick skin and a soft heart
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Ninth, love thinks no evil
Agape love doesn’t operate with any kind of malicious intent
It always focuses on that which is good
It is not suspicious, it doesn’t think the worst about people or situations, rather it gives the benefit of the doubt
It actively searches for the good qualities and accentuates them, rather than focusing on the bad
It is innocent, not fault finding, or nit picking
This can also be described as not keeping a record of wrongs
We often keep lists of the way people have wronged us and if honest, we hope that some day they will get theirs
Agape love is a quick forgiver, not keeping those lists
As such, agape love leaves no room for bitterness or harshness of attitude to develop
Once again we see this demonstrated in the life of Jesus
One of the most simple and sublime statements about Jesus is in Acts 10:38 “God anointed Jesus of
Nazareth with the Holy Spirit and with power, who went about doing good and healing all who were oppressed by the devil, for God was with Him.”
He did good to all – His followers as well as His opponents
His first words from the cross are also evidence of this goodness – Luke 23:34 “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do.”
Honestly, my prayer would have been just a bit different
Tenth, love doesn’t rejoice in iniquity
First this means that love doesn’t smile at the misfortunes of others
It isn’t excited about other’s failures because they make us look better
When something bad happens to someone who we feel deserves it, agape doesn’t celebrate
It doesn’t take an attitude of ‘It serves them right’
Example – Tagger hit on the freeway
This also speaks of it’s attitude towards sin and ungodly behaviors
Love isn’t tolerant towards, ignorant of or wishy-washy about sin
It has a backbone and is willing to confront sin and rebellion with the truth
Love refuses to compromise with sin but always seeks to do the right thing even when that is the hard thing
Jesus identified and ministered to sinners while never condoning or identifying with their sin
Eleventh, love rejoices in the truth
Love is excited when people are right on, living in godliness according to God’s word
God’s word is truth, it is pure absolute truth, thus love rejoices when people are living according to the precepts, judgments, statutes and commandments of the word
As such true agape love does not compromise when it comes to God’s word
Sometimes we feel loving if we overlook something in another’s life that is contrary to God’s word
We like to think we are showing grace
In reality, the most and best love we can show someone is to clearly show them what God says
Agape love rejoices in biblical outcomes of all situations
Twelfth – Fifteenth
These four qualities each have that dreaded word – ‘all’
All means all, and that’s all, all means
For these to be completely true about us we would have to replace the word ‘all’ with the word
‘some’
Bears all things
Nothing is too strong for love so that it is crushed – It always hold’s up
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It’s supply is greater than any demand
Agape love comes directly from God Himself who has an endless supply
What demand then could exhaust that supply?
For this to be a reality, we must be constantly in fellowship with God receiving His love so that we then have love for others that bears all things
Believes all things
Here we have the honesty of love
It isn’t mistrustful or distrustful but rather is willing to give the benefit of the doubt
True agape doesn’t allow it’s faith to waver or fail
It doesn’t become jaded in various situations
Hopes all things
Agape is always optimistic, never negative or cynical
It doesn’t allow it’s perspective concerning the present or future to be dominated by the past
Past experiences can not overwhelm it to the point where it becomes pessimistic about what is to come
It is confident about what good will come
Endures all things
Here we have the final outcome of suffering long
Agape love outlasts all other things – the wrongs done to it, the failings of others, the hurt, pain and sorrow
In the end, agape love remains because it endures all things
Sixteenth, love never fails
The word for fail here actually means to fall off, fall down or fall out of
It was used to describe a flower or leaf falling off a plant
It was also used of an actor being booed or hissed off a stage
When we read that love never fails, it means it holds it’s place
It isn’t moved, diverted or detoured by anything or anyone
It is firm, sturdy, unflappable and unshakeable
When everything else is shaken and moved from the scene, love will remain
It is permanent – which is what the rest of chapter 13 teaches us
Conclusion
God’s definition is just a bit different from ours
His definition is the only definition that matters
This is the kind of love that described His nature and is the kind of love He has for us
Does it describe the kind of love we have for Him and others
If not, allow the Holy Spirit to work this love into, through and out from your life
Next week, we see the permanence of love
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