Ze Trash
©®
Zee Official Organ of ze
Sans Clue Hash House Harriers
Sunday 15th of June 2003
Issue #516
New coloured edition
The Sans Clue Hash meets EVERY Sunday at Garches
SNCF station car park at 14h00. From Paris catch the
13h37 train from Gare Paris-St-Lazare, direction St.Nom-la-Bretèche, usually platform 1. Get off at
Garches Marnes-la-Coquette.
Early arrivals – follow road up past shops, bends
round to right, drink beer in Chinese pub.
HARELINE
515
8-June-03
516
15-June-03
517
22-June-03
518
29-June-03
Rumble in the Jungle
DeepThroat & Tarzan
Anal Condom & Cati
Easy Rider & Jumping Jackass
Victoria's Secret
519
6-July-03
520
521
13-July-03
20-July-03
Gonzo the Gob, McGoose &
MaBouche- Scottish Run
HARES NEEDED
Bastille Day!
Hairy Mary
522
27-July-03
Return to Sender
523
3-Aug-03
Omo & Ma Bouche
524
10-Aug-03
Bébé
HASH HUMOUR:
You need to practice your ITALIAN accent here. !!!!!
Three nuns die and go to heaven, where they are met at
the Pearly Gates by St. Peter. He says, "Ladies, you all led
such wonderful lives, that I'm granting you six months to
go back to Earth and be anyone you want."
The first nun says, "I want-a to be Sophia Loren" and
*poof!* she's gone.
The second says, "I want-a to be Madonna" and *poof!* she's
gone.
The third says, "I want-a to be Sara Pipalini." St. Peter looks
perplexed. "Who?" he says. "Sara Pipalini" replies the nun.
St. Peter shakes his head and says "I'm sorry but that name just
doesn't ring a bell."
The nun then takes a newspaper out of her habit and hands it
to St. Peter. He reads the paper and starts laughing. He hands
it back to her and says :
"No Sister, this says 'Sahara Pipeline laid by 500 men in 7
days'!"
ZE RUN REPORT
Run no. 515 8th of June, 2003
Rumble in the jungle
Hares: Tarzan & Deep Throat
Where: forest St. Germain
We were only a small crowed of 12 hashers, but we really
had great fun; honestly, it was this kind of small hash
where everybody was happy & enjoyed it. But let me start
at the begin ….. hmm, I guess SCH3 broke the record to
wait for someone supposed to come with the train. Grrrh,
these strikes hampered for the first time the smooth hash
organisation. After discussions, should we wait or should
we go, we decided for God’s sake to wait for any single
soul in this damn train. And there was one: Sharp
Shooter who had the Hash Cash. It was worth to wait for
her, nada for the money –the greedy official Hash Cash
had not left much money- no, to wait for our so beloved
Sharp Shooter. Finally, we went off, a long way to the
starting point in the forest St. Germain besides the lake.
There we had many good hashes in the past. But what a
surprise, our secret parking space were covered by
gypsies and their caravans. No problem, we came back
and our beer was still there !! Back to the run & trail:
some good jungle outfit could be noticed, especially
Sharp Shooters; she killed an Indian Tiger and brought
her trophy with and wrapped it about her waist, Toothy
Job sewed a piece of jungle live around her waist, Royal
Flash in Jane outfit (what she denied), Lalo pretended
being a Tiger & made up a primitive Rumble-in-theJungle-TeeeeeShirt, and of course Tarzan & his boy:
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Deep Throat; the latter unfortunately was not
wearing a tiger string (he knows why). The trail, I
would say that I recognised some parts of these
typical DT’s ones, but it was a pleasure to run in this
forest: narrow & hidden trails, soft to run and plenty
check backs. We were not to bad, abandoned by the
usual front runners, we did our best: JustHeather run
like a rapid –up, down- often in the wrong direction
which killed her nearly, and the rest of us, Omo,
Anal Kondon, NeonStripper, Toothy Job,
SharpShooter & me we were simply & modestly
THE BEST. It was as long way to the BN which lead
us to the BS, and the humid jungle air killed us
nearly. BUT we arrived finally at the BS and the
smart walkers and Tarzan welcomed us with COOL
& already opened beer. What a nice BS. It was
lovely, and we’ve spent quiet a while there. DT was
so happy that he drunk 3 bottles of beer, which made
him dizzy and excused why he jumped over
SharpShooter. SleepingSex began to philosophise,
saying the elder person saying always “I’m too old”,
which actually is only a bad excuse for doing
something. Honestly, I was very curious, on what
exactly she was thinking …. but as ToothyJob asked
her, how old are you, SleepingSex replied in a royal
manner “you’re too indiscrete, my dear”, but we
learned afterwards that she’s above 40. Yes, it was
already late and we’d to go, notably as Royal Flash
moaned “I’m hungry”. So then, we took the shortest
way to our bouffe & beer, and we had a great circle
(thanks AK for being a good RA, cool beer (thanks
Omo for taking up MaBouch’s advice how to cool
beer) and thanks to RoyalFlush (finally LALO got
how to write Royal Flush’s name! Ed.) for doing
bouffe. Even ToothyJob had only to give praises for
this smooth organisation.
What did we think of the run ? not enough ladies checks,
too shiggy, too dry, not enough check backs & too many
half-naked hashers.
-
-
-
-
Tarzan for loosing this eye-wear, and when one hare
drinks, all hares drink …
SleepingSex, Omo, Anal Kondom, Just Anne, Neon
Stripper for not wearing any jungle outfit.
Sharp Shooter & Deep Throat for sex on the hash;
first she throw stick on him, which made him wild &
jumped on her (what a primitive jungle behaviour),
and when one hare drinks, all hares drink ….
The RA for the weather
Just Heather for damaging PH3’s cool box
Rewards were made to Omo who learned perfectly to
cool beer and Royal Flash for providing us with
good & plenty food (many thanks guys; we’d
appreciate it a lot)
Reward for the best jungle outfit given toooooo …..
LALO …. that’s me ! I won the little CHITA. If you
want to win a Chita, than you have to come to the
next Jungle run.
In memory to Aquasex, who celebrated this w/e
his 40th birthday, so all hashers above 40 into the
circle: Deep Throat, Tarzan, Omo, Neon
Stripper, SleepingSex, ToothyJob and Lalo
instead for Aquasex;
May the hash go in peace, may the hash get a piece.
A small crowed moved to the pub in St. Germain for
another drink before falling asleep. BURP.
OnOn
Your Scribe for this Week
Likes-A-Long-One (Lalo)
Thanks LALO! Super report!
MA BOUCHE’S GRAPEVINE
GORGEOUS BLOKES RUN
DownDowns awarded by out RA of today – Anal
Kondom:
Hares: Tarzan & Deep Throat
Visitor: Neon Stripper from Canady, mcb the internet
(again cybersex !!)
Returnees: Just Heather & Just Anne
Latecomer: Sharp Shooter
Leaving the hash: Just Heather (she sat –unfortunately
not on her skin- during the circle on ice; well done Just
Heather; you’re good Harriet !).
Criminals:
- SleepingSex for not being comfortable with the
English language at she walks though a field of
wild plants with rough leaves that sting you, and
shouting out: ”Aah, all these nipples”, instead of
nettles.
- ToothyJob as walked into a branch & Lalo as
she fell over, nearly guys, nearly.
It'd be helpful to let hares/me know if you're coming, and
how many fit blokes you're bringing, to get our restaurant
reservation about right. And if you live outside Brussels,
crash space can be arranged.
HERE ARE THE DETAILS
Righty ho, a time and a place has been found for a hash to
celebrate all your favourite hash men! We guarantee some
totty for every taste - just choose a cute guy from your hash
and drag him along!
Where? Brussels (Belgium)
When? Sunday 22nd June 2003
Why? It's the same weekend and place as the Yark Sucker
birthday extravaganza, and what could be a nicer present for
her than seeing lots of sexy blokes running through her
adoptive city!
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What are we doing exactly?
Exactitude is not the hash's strong point, but MaBouche
and
Eye Candy Gorf are planning a scenic run through
Brussels on Sunday afternoon, including lots of gorgeous
"hash views" if the weather is warm, after which we have
a beautiful circle followed by boozing, noshing and
ogling in an appropriate establishment.
How much is this going to cost?
Most likely: pay as you go, typical run fee, price for set
meal, buy own beer, something like that. You may wish
to add a few euros to buy these beautiful lads roses.
What now?
Book 2 tickets to Brussels (or fill up your gas tank) and
show up.
Why 2 tickets? 'Cos not only are you bringing yourself,
you are invited to bring along a gorgeous bloke or 2. Or
more if you know enough!
What gorgeous bloke?
a) your own
b) somebody else's
c) somebody you'd like to have!
Registration would be complicated and unnecessary, but
to get an idea of numbers, please respond during the next
month, then I'll send you more practical details.
Cheers & OnOn
MaBouche
GM, Sans Clue HHH, Paris
Attention
on !
New Sans Clue alien needed. If you find one, please
purchase & pack off to MaBouche: Caitlin CLARKE,
118 rue du
Chemin Vert, 75011 PARIS, France.
------------------Interscandick, 4-6 July, Tallinn, Estonia
http://www.hot.ee/harriers/nordick.htm
------------------Little game – look & see if you’re one of the
hallowed souls on this list!
http://www.gthhh.com/database/hashnames.asp?zzz=
------------------1st Kentish W&NK Klans
Camp Out Bash & Run 14th - 15th June 2003
Venue: Kent Private Orchard: Nr. Smarden Bell, in
deepest Kent, near Ashford
http://www.multimap.com/map/browse.cgi?X=585000&
Y=142500&scale=50000&coordsys=gb
Programme: Saturday BASH from 2:30p.m.
Sunday Run from 11:30a.m.
Invicta Sports (hosted by Fat Controller)
Freebies: Limited Edition Kentish Klans embroidered
Sport Towels
Includes: Sat Night Camp Over with limited facilities; Hog
Roast & Beer Barrel;
Pub Extension :buy own discounted beer Band: "Little
Alligators"
So Hurry and sign up!
We have access to a BBQ so we will provide some vegetarian
food to go with the hog roast (sausages / burgers etc), but still
bring some of your own so we don't run out. Help will
be required with cooking them, I don't want to burn them!!
There will also be salad as part of the hog roast, so you
should all be fine. We can also use the BBQ for breakfast,
any chefs out there? I'm sure we can all chip in!! We will
also get some lager cans in a dust bin, but the pub is
opposite.
Also there is now a support band to complement the main
band starting c 8.30pm. We have a whole section of the pub
dedicated to us with the band, from 8pm onwards on the
Saturday so this should be great. Exclusive to the S*CK
Hash (and only available to us), Fat Controller has
negotiated a deal with the pub for discounted Beer (ale)
all night £1.60 - £1.80 per pint saving between 60p-80p per
pint all night!! This will be form 8pm onwards with an
extension.
For those of you who have not done one before, a BASH is a
bicycle hash, exactly the same but on a bike, and will be c
15 miles both on and off road. They are great fun. Main
Hare Pi*sticide.
Also, remember, those who don't want to camp out, you can
still come to the BASH (2 GBP), the night event (now 3
GBP due to support band and discounted beer), and the
Sunday run (2 GBP) final location TBA for run but will
be possibly 10mins form camp site pub. Please let us
know if you would like to come to any of these but not
the camp out!!.
Hog roast, goodie bag and beer in orchard is only for the
weekend crew, but the pub will obviously be available
after the bash and the hash.
The pub is also putting on a BBQ after the Sunday run for
us, (c 5 GBP) remember this is fathers day so getting in
anywhere else will be difficult.
Contact Sim Campbell (web mistress) :
suckh3@yahoo.co.uk or
Halfway gayeddis@yahoo.com for further details and
registration form
------------------Eric The Retard (real name Eric Sutherland)
Has repaid the missing £2717 back to the West London
Hash. This is excellent news.
------------------Bus to Eurohash from Brussels, etc, Aug 2003.
Babysnatcher and the BMPH3 are organising an all
singing, all dancing all drinking party bus to get us to
Aarhus. If you are interested, get in touch:
stacey.wert@aspentech.com
&&&&&&&&
Don't forget the Gorgeous Blokes run!
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MEET THE MISMANAGEMENT
Grand Mattress: Caitlin Ma Bouche Clarke
06.87.55.60.32 sansclueh3@yahoo.com
Religious Advisor: Jan-Willem Orange Slip Handels
01.48.05.33.60
Beermeister: Alan Iceman Elliott 06.86.28.37.60
Hash Trash Editor: Marie Make Me An Offer Ghantous
06.17.25.66.29 mrghantous@yahoo.com
Hash Cash/Eye Candy: Frank Gorf Weyn 06.70.81.96.32
Hash Horn/Tablemeister: Frank Shag Newman
06.09.76.52.77
Webmaster: Chris 3-Legs Wallwork – 0.46.83.74.12
tcw232002@yahoo.co.uk
Website: http://schhh.free.fr/
Hair Razor : position vacant
Bouffemeister: position vacant
THE OTHER FOUR LOCAL HASHES

Fontainebleau H3: 11h15 Saturdays, fortnightly.
Run 500 on 17th May! Yvonne Winkle Van Roeckel
01.64.99.31.00 pbdesign.yvr@wanadoo.fr
 Paris Fool Moon H3: evenings, monthly.
Jason Hairy Mary hairymary@buchelay.com or
Stefan Cockapulley Murphy 06.08.04.31.62
me@stefanmurphy.net
 Paris H3 fortnightly – next run Sat 24 May, and
Paris Bash monthly both on Saturday afternoons.
Stefan Cockapulley Murphy 06.08.04.31.62
me@stefanmurphy.net
BY THE WAY, HAVE YOU SEEN THE LATEST
EMBARRASSING PHOTOS?
GO TO l'album; it is updated every now and then on a
very regular basis 
http://fr.photos.yahoo.com/bc/pyere1
MORE TALENTS IN THE HASH!
Eh oui! Fucking Fan was playing “les voyeurs” and now
he wants to play “the exhibionnist”. He urges you to
check on this address
http://fr.groups.yahoo.com/group/Bernard_H3_photos/
And if you want to see embarrassing photos from run #
514 hared by Sparky at Bois de Boulogne this is the
EXACT link … that has to be in one sigle line of course.
http://fr.photos.groups.yahoo.com/group/bernard_h3_phot
os/lst?.dir=/2003/2003+06+01+Sans+Clue&.src=gr&.ord
er=&.view=t&.done=http%3a//briefcase.yahoo.com/
MORE FUNNIES … MORE FUNNIES … MORE FUNNIES…
DO YOU WANT TO BE A STUDENT?
Memo to all students: In order to assure the highest levels
of quality work and productivity from students, it will be
our policy to keep all students well taught through our
program of SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TEACHING
(S.H.I.T.). We are trying to give our students more S.H.I.T.
than any other schools. If you feel that you do not receive your
share of S.H.I.T. on the course, please see your lecturer. You
will immediately placed at the top of the S.H.I.T. list and our
lecturers are especially skilled at seeing you get all the
S.H.I.T. you can handle. Students who don't know S.H.I.T.
will be placed in DEPARTMENTAL EDUCATIONAL
EVALUATION PROGRAMS (D.E.E.P. S.H.I.T.). Those who
fail to take D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T. seriously will have to go to
EDUCATIONAL ATTITUDE TRAINING (E.A.T. S.H.I.T.).
Since our lecturers took S.H.I.T. before they graduated, they
don't have to do S.H.I.T. anymore, as they are all full of
S.H.I.T. already. If you are full of S.H.I.T., you may be
intersted in a job teaching others. We can add your name to
our BASIC UNDERSTANDING LECTURE LIST (B.U.L.L.
S.H.I.T.). For students who are attending to pursue a carrier in
management and consultancy, we will refer you to the
department of MANAGERIAL OPERATIONAL
RESEARCH EDUCATION (M.O.R.E. S.H.I.T.). This course
emphasizes on how to manage M.O.R.E. S.H.I.T. If you have
further questions, please direct them to our HEAD OF
TEACHING SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING
(H.O.T. S.H.I.T.)
Thank you,
BOSS IN GENERAL SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY
TRAINING
(B.I.G. S.H.I.T.)
LETTERS TO THE EDITOR
Dear Trash Editor:
My beautiful handsom just 40 boyfriend has never given
me an orgasm. I cannot live this way anymore and I am
too shy to tell anyone anything: it is so intimate. You’re the
only one I trust because I know you’ll keep a secret.
"Frustrated."
Dear Likes A Long One:
With a name like yours, no Wonder! But you have to know that
the female orgasm is a myth. It is fostered by militant, manhating feminists and is a danger to the family unit. Don't
mention it again to Aquasex and show your love to him by
buying a Harley-Davidson Sportster ... and don't forget to
cook him a delicious meal.
Sincerely yours
Hash Trash Editor
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