The ABCs of Stress Management
Hodges L. Golson, Ph.D.
This is a summary of some of the work of Albert Ellis, a pioneering psychologist who helped focus
therapists and counselors on the rational basis for controlling our emotions and helping us to live
better, more productive and less anxious lives. This work is often referred to as the ABC model.
A. THE ACTIVATING EVENT -- e.g. Adversity: There has been a recent reorganization and a
great deal of associated trauma (cutbacks, demotions, tougher jobs, having to do more with
less, continuing uncertainty, etc.).
B.
THE BELIEF SYSTEM (The Filter)
1. Rational Beliefs (observable, empirical): These can cause uncomfortable, unpleasant,
deep but appropriate emotions and can stimulate appropriate responses to correct the problem.
• "This is inconvenient and unfortunate, it's unpleasant."
• "This is disadvantageous to me -- I'll have to work harder, possibly for less reward."
• "I've lost some of my earlier support systems, structure and friends. This makes things
more difficult."
• "I may even lose my own job."
2. Irrational Beliefs (unverifiable, un-measurable, arbitrary): These lead to continued selfdefeating behavior, inappropriate emotions and inappropriate responses.
• "This situation is awful and terrible."
• "It's unfair to me."
• "This whole thing shouldn't have happened."
• "I must be totally incompetent for allowing it to happen."
• "I'm being punished."
3.
Typical Irrational Beliefs -- The Main Forms. (But there are almost endless variations.)
• "I must do well and win approval or I am a rotten person."
• "Other people must treat me well. If they don't, they should be punished."
• "Things must be arranged so that I get what I want quickly and easily, and so that bad
things don't happen."
C.
THE CONSEQUENCES
1. From the Rational Beliefs: "I don't like it. I wish it were different. I want to change it.
This is painful, unfortunate and inconvenient. I need to do something about it."
2. From the Irrational: "I'm unmotivated. I really can't get with the program. I'm
depressed. There's no use trying. I've got too much to do and not enough resources. Inertia
has set in and I feel guilty for sitting on my butt and not doing more."
D.
DISPUTING IRRATIONAL BELIEFS: A KEY TO PSYCHOLOGICAL HEALTH
1.
"This is Awful and Terrible." How do you define terrible and awful? They’re arbitrary.
You can’t measure or define them in objective terms or quantify them with rational metrics. Yes,
this is an inconvenient, unpleasant, disappointing and irritating situation. But it's not more than
100% inconvenient, unpleasant or disappointing. Anyway, why should the world be arranged for
your comfort and benefit?
2. "It's Unfair." Whoever convinced you that life was fair? This is magical thinking. Why
are you so special that bad things don't have to happen to you? Nothing's sacred and nothing's
awful. The world doesn't care about you and your problems.
3. "This Shouldn't Have Happened." Why? There is no logical reason why these problems
shouldn't exist. Why should you have special attention so that bad things shouldn't happen to
you? Again, it's inconvenient and unpleasant and maybe you'll have to look for another job or
choose another career. However, there's no reason why this shouldn't be.
4. "I Must Be Totally Incompetent; I Shouldn't Have Failed." You may have acted
incompetently at times. Everybody does. However, does that mean that you are totally
incompetent? Where is the evidence for incompetence? Can you think of any times when you've
been successful? Dose failure mean general incompetence? Why shouldn't you fail? Again, why
are you so special and different that you shouldn't make mistakes and fail once in a while?
5. "I Should Be Punished for My Lousy Behavior." Why? What makes you so special that
you are singled out for condemnation and unique punishment? You may not be rewarded for
your inertia and you may be criticized for failing but you will not be condemned because of this.
E.
THE NEW EFFECTS
1. "This situation is inconvenient, painful and disadvantageous, etc., but it is not awful or
terrible. Nothing is awful, terrible or catastrophic unless I arbitrarily (and magically) define it
so. There is no reason or law which states that I should not or must not be placed in this
situation or experience this discomfort. I have the ability to determine those factors over which I
have control and I have the ability to make changes accordingly. This is the hand I was dealt.
Although I don't like it and it's irritating and upsetting, the facts are friendly. I can find a way to
make things better."
2. "No matter how poorly I do, I don't deserve Special Punishment. I may not get the
reward I seek but I'm not going to be damned and condemned. Just because I perform poorly or
fail at a task now does not mean that I can't succeed at the same or other tasks in the future.
Just because I make mistakes and perform poorly at times, or even often, does not mean that I
am incompetent."
Basics of the Model
1.
I create inappropriate emotions and reactions at Point C…nobody else.
2. No matter how bad things are or how poorly people act at Point A, MY BELIEFS about it are
what upset me at Point C.
3. Every time I feel seriously upset (anxious, guilty, hostile, etc.), I am convincing myself of
both a rational and an irrational belief.
4. Typical Rational Belief form: I don't like it. It's really unfortunate. It's irritating. I wish I
could change it. Typical Irrational Belief form: It's terrible. How awful that this condition should
exist. I can't stand it. It shouldn’t be like this. I must be a rotten person for allowing it or for
having it happen to me. It shouldn't exist.
5. With constant and persistent Disputing and challenging of my irrational beliefs, I will sooner
or later minimize or eliminate them. If I continue to dispute my iBs when I’m upset, I'll
eventually develop a much different, less demanding and more rewarding outlook that will keep
me from upsetting myself unnecessarily.
6. Then, when I get to Point E, I’ll feel more like doing something. I won't feel so guilty or
have such inappropriate reactions to bad news. I'll be more likely to go back to Point A and do
whatever I can to make things better.
REFERENCES:
Ellis, Albert. Executive Leadership: A Rational Approach.
Ellis, Albert. A New Guide to Rational Living.
Hodges L. Golson, Ph.D. is president and a founding partner of Management Psychology Group.