When Helping Hurts,
Compassion Fatigue and
The Veterinary Care
Profession
Dr. Kathleen Ayl,
Pet Loss Recovery and
Compassion Fatigue Specialist
Copyright, KEA, 2015
Compassion Without Balance
Can Lead To Disaster
Most Veterinary Team Members Are
Highly Compassionate
-Often For Everyone But Themselves
Veterinary Caregivers Must Seek Balance
In Their Lives In Order To Avoid
Compassion Fatigue
Copyright, KEA, 2015
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The Goal
To Provide Proactive Support To
Veterinary Team Members In Order That
They Can Avoid Compassion Fatigue
Altogether.
To Assist Those Who Have Already Fallen
Into The Clutches Of Compassion Fatigue
Find Their Way Back To Themselves.
Copyright, KEA, 2015
The Qualities That Make You
A Valuable Team Member
Can Be The Same Qualities
That Steal Your Emotional,
Spiritual, Financial & Physical
Resources
Copyright, KEA, 2015
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Honoring The Patients, The
Clients & Ourselves
Š Clients Often Express Loyalty To
Practices Providing Compassionate
Support, Which Can Be As Important
As Medical Or Palliative Care.
Š Your Ability To Empathize & Be
Present & Compassionate Allows This
To Happen
Copyright, KEA, 2015
Honoring The Patients, The
Clients & Ourselves
Š Clinicians Are More Scientifically Minded
When Approaching Cases and And More
Comfortable With Things Like Diagnoses
and Treatment Plans. However…
Š We Must Be Compassionate And
Congruent And Recognize & Become
Comfortable With Our Own Feelings.
Š We Must Honor Our Feelings And Needs
In Order to Maintain Our Balance
Thereby Helping Our Clients, Our
Patients & Ourselves.
Copyright, KEA, 2015
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Why Is This Bond So Strong?
Š Pets Offer Many Positive Effects: They
Elevate Moods; Lower Blood Pressure;
Help Heart Rates Decline; Accelerate
Healing and Minimize Post Operative
Bleeding.
Š Pets Love Unconditionally and Without
Judgment.
Copyright, KEA, 2015
Compassion Fatigue:
A Very Real Problem In
Veterinary Medicine
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Sympathy: An Awareness & Understanding
About Another Person’s Pain or Painful
Situation
Empathy: To Vicariously Experience
Someone Else’s Pain (Walk In Their Shoes)
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What Is Compassion?
Compassion Denotes Being Fully Present For Another
Being Who Has Been Traumatized Or Who Is Suffering
Compassion Focuses Our Empathy And Sympathy And
Puts Them Into Action In An Effort To Try And Help…
Copyright, KEA, 2015
5
“Compassion is that which makes the heart of
the good move at the pain of others…
It is called compassion because it shelters and
embraces the distressed.”
-Buddha
What Is Compassion Fatigue?
Š Compassion Fatigue Is The Physical,
Mental & Spiritual Exhaustion,
Accompanied By Acute Emotional Pain,
That Stems From Caregiving.
Š It Is Caused By Working Continually
With The Suffering Of Others While Not
Taking Care Of Our Own Physical,
Emotional, Mental and Spiritual Needs.
Copyright, KEA, 2015
6
What Causes Compassion Fatigue
In Veterinary Medicine?
Š Repeated, Long-Term Exposure To The
Suffering And Loss Of Others
Š The Lack Of A Well Balanced Life
Š Continual And Exhausting Physical &
Emotional Demands Of Our Profession
Copyright, KEA, 2015
When The Veterinary
Team Is Out Of
Balance
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The Veterinary Team
Š Do You Know Anyone In Veterinary
Medicine That May Already Be
Suffering From Compassion
Fatigue?
Š Left Unaddressed, It Can Lead To
Career Dissatisfaction, High
Turnover Rates, Problems With
Personal Relationships, Substance
Abuse, Isolation, Self Destructive
Behaviors & Even Suicide..
Copyright, KEA, 2015
Compassion
Fatigue,
The Inner & Outer
Factors…
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Intrinsic Factors
Š The Ability To Experience Emotion
And Pick Up On Emotional Cues Of
Others.
Š Personality Types; Perfectionism
Š Lack of Assertiveness
Š A Sensitivity To Suffering
Copyright, KEA, 2015
Extrinsic Factors
Š Time Constraints (The Lack Of Time
To Get Everything Done)
Š Ongoing Exposure To Death
Š Unresolved Trauma And Grief
Š Work Related Stressors
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Etiology
Most Team Members Became Veterinary
Care Professionals In Order To Make A
Difference.
The Almost Inherent Lack Of Time &
Continual Exposure To The Trauma and
Suffering Of Others, Can & Does Lead
Quickly To A Life That Is Completely Out Of
Balance.
Copyright, KEA, 2015
Etiology Continued…
Š Being Too Busy To Tend To Your Own
Well-Being And Putting Your Own
Needs Last Can And Will Lead You
Straight Into An Insidious Battle With
Compassion Fatigue.
Š Compassion Fatigue Will Take A Huge
Toll On Your Physical, Emotional,
Spiritual and Mental Health.
Copyright, KEA, 2015
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The
Grieving
Process…
A Long & Lonely Road
Copyright, KEA, 2015
Veterinary Team Members Must
Honor Their Own Feelings &
Issues Of Grief and Loss
Š Loss, and The Threat Thereof, Can Have
An Overwhelming Effect On Us And It
Must Be Addressed And Dealt With.
Š The Intensity Of Grief Is A Direct
Reflection Of The Intensity Of The
Relationship Shared.
Š Profound Loss Lasts A Lifetime And We
Must Be Aware Of Our Issues Around It.
Copyright, KEA, 2015
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Grief And The Clinician
Š Veterinary Team Members Can & Do
Form Deep Attachments With Patients &
Clients.
Š Making It Even More Difficult:
Š Ending A Life That You’ve Spent A Lot
Of Time and Energy Saving.
Š Feeling Powerless Over Your Inability
To Control The Disease and It’s
Consequential Problems.
Š The Emotional Pain When A Patient
Dies In A Difficult Way.
Copyright, KEA, 2015
The Grieving Process
Š As It Is For Our Clients, So Too Is It
For Ourselves…In Order To Heal
From The Horrendous Pain Of Grief,
We Must Have A Safe Place In
Which To Express Our Emotions On
An Ongoing Basis Where:
Our Feelings Are Validated
And We Are Not Judged
Copyright, KEA, 2015
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The Grieving Process
Š The Most Important Gift You Can Give
Yourself Or A Client Who Is Grieving Is
Someone Who Cares To Listen.
Š Remember: There Is No Specific
Treatment Protocol, Grief Is
Individual.
Š Remain Sensitive And Open To Your
Needs As Well As The Needs Of Your
Clients and Fellow Team Members.
Copyright, KEA, 2015
The Grieving Process
There Is No Script Nor Road Map For
Grief; It Is A Process, Something That
Evolves Over Time.
The Only Way Through Grief Is To Feel
It, Honor It, and Express It Over and
Over Again. It Is Not Easy, But It Is
Necessary In Order To Find Ourselves
Again.
Copyright, KEA, 2015
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Grief and Euthanasia
There Is A High Degree Of Trauma,
Grief And Compassion Fatigue Among
Veterinary Team Members Who Are
Forced To Perform Euthanasia On A
Frequent Basis.
-The Most Stressful Of Which Are
Owners Opting For Euthanasia On
Perfectly Healthy Pets Or Those That
Could Have Benefited From
Veterinary Care.
Copyright, KEA, 2015
The Stress Of Not Letting Go
Also Stressful, Frustrating And Emotionally
Difficult To Deal With Are Clients Who Are
Not Prepared To Let Go Of A Pet That Is
Suffering Or No Longer Has What You
Consider An Acceptable Quality Of Life.
We Can All Become Blinded By The Love We
Have For Our Pets Or The Fear Of Dealing
With The Pain Of Their Loss, Which Can
Render Us Incapable Of Making The Right
Decisions.
Copyright, KEA, 2015
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Honoring The Grieving
Process
ŠAssist Clients As Much As Possible In
The Difficult Decisions They Are Forced
To Make.
ŠProvide Emotionally and Esthetically
Warm Environments Especially For
Euthanasia.
ŠFollow Up With A Show Of Concern
Through: Sympathy Cards, Phone
Calls, Flowers Or Memorial Gifts.
Copyright, KEA, 2015
Aiding the Grieving Process
Š What Not To Say Is Often More
Important Than What To Say.
Š Avoid Clichés and Comparisons.
Š Paraphrase Back What Was Heard
Allowing The Client To Feel Valued.
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Caring For The Clinician
Struggling To Find Your Balance
Copyright, KEA, 2015
Caring for the Clinician
Š It Is Normal For The Veterinary Team
To Go Through A Wide Range Of
Difficult Emotions That May Lead To The
Feelings Of Wanting To Withdraw Or
Isolate.
Š Clinicians Must Give Themselves
Permission To Grieve. Left
Unaddressed, Grief Can Lead To:
Depression; Anxiety; Mistrust; Disease;
A Sense Of Hopelessness and
Ultimately, Compassion Fatigue.
Copyright, KEA, 2015
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Caring For Our
Technicians
Technicians Typically Have A Huge
Amount Of Responsibilities And Find
Themselves Continually In Highly
Stressful Situations.
They Are Forced To Multitask Most Of The
Time
They Must Communicate With Clients On
Highly Sensitive Issues
Copyright, KEA, 2015
Caring For Our Interns
The Typical Veterinary Intern Has A Huge
Amount Of Responsibilities And Must Also
Communicate With Emotional Clients On
Sensitive Issues Such As Euthanasia.
Most Interns Are Sleep Deprived And The
Idea Of Self-Care Is But A Distant Dream
To Them. Being Physically & Emotionally
Exhausted, They Can Become Overly
Emotional When Dealing With Trauma
And Grief.
Copyright, KEA, 2015
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Don’t Forget The Front Desk
Front Office Team Members Are
Often Affected By Euthanasia & Grief
Which Seldom Gets Acknowledged
Yet They Define Our Practices! We
Must Honor And Look Out For Them
And Include Them In Compassion
Fatigue Training
Copyright, KEA, 2015
Caring For The Clinician
Š Veterinary Caregivers Must Learn How
To Take Care Of Themselves.
Š Foreign Concept?! Yes, As We Have
Seen…Most Veterinary Professionals
Have A Difficult Time Doing So!
Š We Need To Be Able To Process Our
Own Losses On An On-Going Basis
Through On-Site Support or Regularly
Scheduled De-Briefing Sessions.
Copyright, KEA, 2015
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Compassion Fatigue
When Life Becomes A Blur…
Copyright, KEA, 2015
When Helping Hurts…
Exhaustion & Despair Often Accompany
Repeated, Long-Term Exposure To The
Suffering of Both Patients & Clients.
Combined With Massive Emotional &
Physical Demands & The Financial Climate
Affecting Client’s Treatment Decisions, Its
No Wonder That Compassion Fatigue Is
So Common Amongst Veterinary
Professionals Today.
Copyright, KEA, 2015
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Symptoms When Dealing With
The Ulitmate Identity Thief
Š Behavioral: Uncharacteristically Impatient,
Irritable, Withdrawn, Depressed,
Overwhelmed or Frustrated. Experiencing
Sleep and/or Appetite Changes.
Š Cognitive: Ruminations of Traumatic Events;
Forgetfulness; Nightmares; Diminished
Concentration; Short Term Memory Deficits;
Inability To Complete A Task.
Š Emotional: Feeling Powerless; Angry; Guilty;
Anxious; Sad; Numb; Apathetic.
Copyright, KEA, 2015
When Helping Hurts…
Š Veterinary Medicine Loses Many
Talented Professionals Needlessly,
Every Year, To Compassion Fatigue.
Š Many Leave The Profession, Others May
Turn To Substance Use & Abuse & Other
Self Sabotaging Behaviors & Some Decide
To End Their Own Lives.
Copyright, KEA, 2015
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When Helping Hurts…
At This Point, If You Are Thinking That
You Might Already Have Compassion
Fatigue, You Probably Do….
Copyright, KEA, 2015
When Helping Hurts…
Where Do We Go From Here? How Do We
Fix Compassion Fatigue?
-Recognizing & Identifying It.
-Learning How To Care Of Yourself
Physically, Emotionally, Mentally and
Spiritually On A Proactive Basis.
Copyright, KEA, 2015
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When Helping Hurts
Questions:
Š What Do You Think It Takes To Have
As Much Compassion For Oneself As For
Others?
Š Do You Think It Is Difficult For Vet
Caregivers To Give Themselves
Permission To Be Gentler & Kinder
Toward Themselves?
Why or Why Not?
Copyright, KEA, 2015
When Helping Hurts…
Š The Road To Recovery For Which
There Is No Roadmap! Somewhere We
Eliminated Those Things That
Benefitted Us.
-Time To Rediscover How To Play
-Learn To Relax And Not Have To Do
-Learn To Set Limits (Say “No”)
-Find The Humor In Life
-Be Compassionate With Yourself
Copyright, KEA, 2015
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Learning How To Play,
When Helping Hurts…
Š Play Is Defined As “Time Spent Without
Purpose”. (Stuart Brown)
Š Play Is Highly Therapeutic When You
Allow Yourself To Be Absorbed In It.
Š Through Play You Allow Yourself To
Rejuvenate.
Copyright, KEA, 2015
Setting Limits When Helping
Hurts
If You Struggle With Setting Limits, Ask
Yourself The Following Questions:
-Would You Feel Comfortable Asking
Someone Else To Do The Same Thing
That You Are Being Asked To Do?
-Would You Agree To Do Whatever It Is If
You Knew That No One Would Be Upset
With You If You Didn’t?
-Think Of Someone
You
Know That Has
Copyright,
KEA, 2015
Good Boundaries How Would They
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Setting Limits When Helping
Hurts
Š Think Of Someone That You Know And
Respect, Someone That Has Good
Boundaries. Then Ask Yourself The
Following Question, “How Would They
Handle This Request Regarding Doing
Something That They Didn’t Particularly
Want To Do?”
Copyright, KEA, 2015
New Golden Rule For
Veterinary Professionals…
Do On To Yourself As You Would Have
Done On To Others!
Copyright, KEA, 2015
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Finding Humor In Life, When
Helping Hurts…
Š Amid All The Pain, Humor Can Exist In
The Most Unlikely Places. Your Job Is
To Find It…
Š Puppies, Kittens, Funny Words, Funny
People, Funny Television Programs, Live
Comedy Shows, Funny Movies.
Š Like Play, Laughter Is Also Therapeutic.
Copyright, KEA, 2015
When Helping Hurts
Š Many Benefit From: Mindfulness
Training; Yoga; Mediation; Tai Chi;
Physical Exercise; Quiet Time; Massage
Therapy; Getting In Touch With Nature
and Creativity.
Š Creativity Provides Direct Access To
“Soul Stuff” Or That Which Is Buried
Deeply Within.
Copyright, KEA, 2015
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When Helping Hurts…
Š Implement Your Self-Care Plan and
Share What You’ve Learned With Your
Team…All Will Benefit!
Copyright, KEA, 2015
In Conclusion…
Copyright, KEA, 2015
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When Helping Hurts…
Š Don’t Wait For This To Happen To You.
Through Proactive Self-Care
Compassion Fatigue Can Be Prevented.
Š Concentrate on What You Can Do, Not
On What You Can’t.
Š Treat Yourself With The Same
Compassion, Dignity and Respect That
You Show Others.
Š Honor Yourself And Your Feelings And
Strive Always To Remain Congruent,
Compassionate and Mindful.
Copyright, KEA, 2015
In Summary
Š Our Struggles Are Amongst Our
Greatest Teachers, Teaching Us Most
About Who We Are.
Š Loss Is A Constant Reminder That Our
Relationships Won’t Last Forever.
Š Grief and Loss Gift Us With A Sense of
Preciousness and Appreciation For The
Moments We Have With The Ones We
Care About.
Copyright, KEA, 2015
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In Summary…
You Are A Compassionate And
Talented Veterinary Professional You
Are Not An Invincible Superhero!
Treat Yourself With The Same Care
And Respect That You Give Others
And Compassion Fatigue Will Not
Become An Issue.
Copyright, KEA, 2015
Dr. Ayl Can Be
Reached At:
dr.ayl@griefassociates.com
www.griefassociates.com
For Copies Of “When
Helping Hurts,
Compassion
Fatigue and The Veterinary
Profession” Go To:
aahanet.org
Copyright, KEA, 2015
Thank you!
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