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GOLDEN TOQUE NEWSLETTER
NOVEMBER 2007
health.
Communications:
Letters, cards, e-mails and phone calls to/from:
Wolfgang Bierer, Bill Franklin, Ken
Wade, Brother Herman Zaccarelli, Michael
Minor, Tom Maas, Josephine Pantano, Tom
Elkin, Tom Macrina, Manfred Bast, Maurice
Zeck, Major Jarmon, Joe Eidem, Amato
Ferrero, Charles Carroll, Robert Benson, Jim
Miller, Jan Verdonkschot, Oliver Sommer,
Robert Nograd, Tom Hickey, Van Atkins, Willy
Rossel, and they all say hello and regards to
everyone.
#################
NEWS ABOUT MEMBERS:
Health News:
Ollie Sommer says he is feeling good,
taking care of his little dog.
##########
Hi to all of you folks. I am sorry I have not
kept in touch with you but I have been in the
Hospital and or emergency on more than I care
to admit. It all started last Oct 23 and has not
stopped as yet. They found cancer again in
the prostate and a tumor had grown into the
bladder from the prostrate and I spent a full 7
days in the Hospital and now for three weeks
we have been trying to pee by self and canot
soI have been living with a Cath in me now to
day is the last try to do it by myself if I can not I
guess there will some kind of implant put in so
if you do not hear in the near future I will most
be back in the hospital this evening. the best to
all of you.
Jim Kosec
11-20-2007
#################
Let us make sure to keep in
communication with all those who are not
feeling well a card, phone call, or letter really
helps. Remember—Ana Nograd, Orville
Middendorf, Walter Meyer, Jon Greenwalt,
James and Barb Kosec, Rudolph Soeder,
Mary Colletti, and Stanley Nicas. We hope
for all our members’ quick recovery and good
##################
COOKBOOK NEWS
Cookbook sales and distribution
director. We have cookbooks for sale.
Contact information is:
John E. Bogacki,
3100 Tollgate Road,
St. Louis, Mo. 63129
314-432-2315 ext. 227
314-846-2200
Contact John for further information.
######################
ADDRESS CHANGES:
CHEF THOMAS A. BERG
P.O.BOX 41574
MINNEAPOLIS, MN 55441-0574
########################
Nominations are now solicited
for next year 2008—
WE HAVE THESE NOMINATIONS:
Grand Cmdr. TOM HICKEY
Cmdr.Sec. JOEL TANNER
Cmdr.Treas.JEAN-JACQUES DEITRICH
and two Commander Directors
PLEASE SUBMIT IN WRITING ALL NOMINATIONS TO:
JOHN KEMPF, NOMIN ATION CHAIRMAN
27952 N. DARRELL ROAD
WAUCONDA, IL 60084
PHONE 847-526-3466
All candidates must accept the
nomination by written acceptance to Mr. John
Kempf.
############
COMMITTEES AND BOARDS
BOARD OF ACCEPTANCE
William Lyman, Grand Commander, Chairman
John Kempf, Past Grand Commander
Dr. Stanley Nicas, Past Grand Commander
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GOLDEN TOQUE NEWSLETTER
NOVEMBER 2007
Jean E. Clary, Past Grand Commander
PHONE: HOME: 440-639-1453
Oliver Sommer, Past Grand Commander
Dr. Robert Nograd, Grand Commander ex Officio
ADVISORY COUNCIL (Art. 15.0)
William Lyman, Grand Commander
John Kempf, Past Grand Commander
Dr, Stanley Nicas, Past Grand Commander
Jean E. Clary, Past Grand Commander
Oliver Sommer, Past Grand Commander
Dr. Robert Nograd-Grand Commander exOfficio
Nominating & Elections
John Kempf - Chairman
847-526-3466
Jean Clary, Co-Chairman
702-458-2054
Robert Nograd
954-721-2147
Committee for 2007 Meeting
Tom Macrina
Parliamentarian
Dr. L Edwin Brown
904-471-3863
Permanent Records Custodian
Tom Hickey
Sullivan University
Education/Scholarship Committee
Van Atkins
702-221-0414
Karl Guggenmos
401-942-9792
Oliver Sommer
636-947-3795
Sergeant of Arms
Van Atkins
702-221-0414
Norman Hart
716-650-0289
Cookbook Sales
John Bogacki
314-432-2315x227
OFFICE: 440-350-1100-X204
Those of you who have been so generous with
your monies, time, effort and support, THANK
YOU SO VERY MUCH!! ********************
New FISCAL YEAR STARTS: MAY 1, 2008
####################
CURRENT DONORS—2007
Jess Barbosa
Werner Zefferer
William Lyman
John Bogacki
Richard Tromposh
Fritz Sonnenschmidt
Michael Zelski
Phil Learned
Carlo Castagneri
L. Edwin Brown
Major Jarmon
Van Atkins
Wolfgang Geckler
Hans Roth
Philip McGuirk
Marga Bosjnak
Cora Sinkeldam
Richard Battista
John Kaufmann
Nobile Masi
Bro. Herman Zaccarelli
John Lubinski
Michael Minor
Joe Eidem
Helen Merkle,
John Zehnder
Roberto Gerometta
Charles Carroll
Tom Macrina
Manfred Bast
Tom Vaccaro
Paul Goebel
Robert Garlough
John Fisher
Richard Fisher
James Kosec
314-846-2200
Promotions & Public Relations
Joel Tanner
616-891-0491
Senior Advisory Committee
Oliver Sommer, Chrm. 636-947-3795
Luigi La Valle
513-662-7326
Amato Ferrero
706-744-0326
Willy Rossel
305-901-4147
Newsletter
Jean Clary--editor
702-458-2054
Health and Welfare Committee
Michael Minor
**********************
NOTE!!
All donation checks should be
“General Fund or Scholarship Fund” made
payable to:"Honorable Order of the Golden
Toque"---- and sent to:
COMMANDER TREASURER
JAMES MILLER
6679 SHANNON LANE
MENTOR, OH, 44060
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GOLDEN TOQUE NEWSLETTER
NOVEMBER 2007
Jean Clary
Jean-Jacques Dietrich
Dan Varano
Robert Nograd
Thomas Mass
Mary Petersen
Scott Gilbert
Michael Minor
Tom Elkin
Dr. Al Sullivan
Sullivan University
Karl Guggenmos
Johnson and Wales University
Louis Perrotte
Gaspard and Madeline Caloz
Bob Chester
Josephine Pantano
Harry Hoffstadt
Joel Tanner
Rudiger Grimm
John Carroll
Willy Rossell
Bert Cutino
Stanley Nicas
Bernard Urban
Nick Marino
If your name is missing and you have made a
NOTE: Fiscal year
ends; April 30, 2008
***************
contribution please notify us.
IMPORTANT DATES ANNUAL MEETING -
JUNE 6, 7, 8, 2008
PHILADELPHIA, PA—More
information later or Contact Chef
Tom Macrina
###############
*********************
HAPPY BIRTHDAYS TO:
November
Socrates Inonog
Manfred Bast
November----78
November 29 = 70
Wolfgang Bierer
Alex Cerino
Lee Conway
John Minniti
Walter Rhea
Al Sullivan
November 9 = 72
November 22 = 71
November 8 = 49
November 8 = 61
November 26 = 59
November 2 = 69
December
Van Atkins
Gino Corelli
L. Edwin Brown
Joe Eidem
Ruediger Grimm
Barbara Kuck
Luigi La Valle
Hans Roth
Clifton Williams
December 11 = 58
December 9 = 76
December 1 = 74
December 23 = 58
December 12 = 68
December 11 = 55
December 27 = 77
December 16 = 84
December 5 = 66
######################
And from ChefJoe Eidem
I had the pleasure of having
breakfast at my home with Chef Jon and
his wife Doris yesterday morning,
November 26,2007. As you all know
Chef Jon had a stroke last April and with
this picture I have attached you all can
see how well he is doing.
Chef Jon and Doris were taking
their new Hybrid car on a little trip
visiting Grand kids in Lovelock,
Nevada. Chef Jon is very proud of his
new car with a GPS system and 40
miles per gallon.
It has been a rough road for the
both of them as recovery is never fast
enough for a Chef. Doris always
remains close by his side as a very
dedicated loving caring wife and care
giver.
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GOLDEN TOQUE NEWSLETTER
NOVEMBER 2007
SATE AJAM MADURA- skewered chicken
They both are planning to attend
the Western Regional in Salt Lake City.
Chef Jon states with the current price of
gas and airline tickets they will drive
their new car.
Just a note to all of you who have
shared all your concerns and have sent
all your love and prayers to this one
GREAT Chef I knew you would want to
know how well he is recovery. Please
let others know of Chef Jon successful
recovery.
####################
By Jan Verdonkschot
INDONESIAN DINNER MENU
October 2007
at Jan’s Farm
THE MENU:
GADO GADO
cold appetizer small french green beans,
blanched cauliflower, green onion brushes
carrot sticks, bok choy, gurkens, baby corn,
green and red bell pepper strips, egg
SOTO AJAM
gingered chicken broth passed in individual
terrines
LOEMPIA AJAM
small chicken eggrolls, ginger sauce
BUFFET
NASI GORENG- fried rice
FRICADEL GORENG- braised coconut
flavored
beef rounds
BOEMBOE BALI IKAN- bluefish braised in
ginger sauce with banana blossum
SATE BABI JAVA- skewered pork
with peanut sauce
with
peanut sauce
OEDANG GORENG- fried prawns
TELOR MASAK BALI - boiled egg halves in
light coconut curry sauce
PISANG GORENG- batter fried bananas
KROEPOEK OEDANG- shrimp crackers
SAMBAL GORENG OEDANG- fried shrimp
straws
ZOETZUUR LOBAK-pickled white radish
slices
KETIMOEN- java cucumber
AMBA HALDAR - fresh turmeric pickle
SEROENDENG KETJANG - toasted
coconut with peanuts
KETJUP MANIS- sweet soy sauce
SAMBAL GORENG, SAMBAL MANIS,
SAMBAL TRASSIred hot pepper relish
COUPE LOMBOK - dessert
#########################
FROM CHEF VAN ATKINS: Last
Saturday I had the pleasure of
conducting a cooking class/ dinner for
Fire Station # 42 here in Las Vegas, It is
something that I have been wanting to
peanut
dipping
sauce
do for aquarters,
long time.
To give
back
to these
brave men and women who give us
there all everyday.
My daughter, Vanessa, boy friend,
Ian Pearson is a Fire Fighter at this
station and made the arrangements. I let
the boys write their own menu and here
it is:
Lobster Bisque, Boiled Dungeness
Crab, New (Idaho) Potatoes, and Late
Corn on the Cob Southwest style, Garlic
Bread and for dessert, Bananas Foster,
that was a curve ball as there is no
alcohol at the Fire Station. I love a
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GOLDEN TOQUE NEWSLETTER
NOVEMBER 2007
Pastry Chef of the Year 2005. Chef Darrin
challenge.
All in all a good time was had by all,
these brave souls have one heck of an
appetite, and I can assure you that
when the alarm goes off, off they go, do
you know how hard it would be to walk
(run) away from Banana Foster, well I
witnessed it.
I am looking forward to our next
cooking class/ dinner over the
Christmas holiday’s, oh and I almost
forgot that I was assisted by my wife
Betty and young Vanessa.
Good Cooking, Van
###################
Day Of Culinary Excellence
2008
ROCC Culinary Symposium
January 14, 2008
River Oaks Country Club
Houston, TX
OPEN TO ALL HOSPITALITY
INDUSTRY PROFESSIONALS
Executive Chef Charles Carroll CEC,
AAC welcomes you to the first everCulinary Symposium held at the River Oaks
Country Club in
Houston, TX.
Come and enjoy a blockbuster, action
packed day filled with nationally acclaimed
Chefs and motivational speakers.
The ROCC Culinary Symposium’s
mission is to provide the most intense
instruction and presentations all in one day.
$125.00 all-inclusive for the day.
Please see registration form for deadlines.
Limited to the first 250 people.
6:00 AM
Pastry Registration 7:00-9:30
AM
Hands On Chocolate with Chef Darrin
Aoyama CEPC Olympic Gold Winner and
will demonstrate a variety of basic
chocolate techniques. Students will have
the opportunity to work with the chocolate
and three-dimensional floral designs which
will be incorporated into a centerpiece. This
workshop will be limited to the first twelve
Chefs. $100.00 registration for class.
7:00 AM Symposium Registration
Continental Breakfast 8:00- 9:15 AM
Presentation 1 by Chef John Folse
CEC, AAC
“The Trials and Tribulations of
Building A Culinary Empire” with special
guest Johnny Carrabba Owner of Chef
John Folse & Co. Owner of Carrabba’s
Restaurant
9:15-9:25 AM Beverage Break
9:30-10:40 AM
Presentation 2
Executive Chef Charles Carroll
CEC, AAC
“Understanding Today’s Generation,
Getting Great Employees To Want To Work
For You” Executive Chef River Oaks
Country Club
10:40-10:50 AM Beverage Break 10:5512:00 PM Presentation 3 Chef Peter
Timmins CMC “Contemporary Buffet
Presentations and Concepts” Executive
Chef Greenbrier Resort
12:00 PM-1:15 PM
Special Lunch Buffet Created By The
ROCC Culinary Team 1:30-2:40 PM
Presentation 4
Gregg Patterson “How To Be A Level
Three Chef” General Manager and
Motivational Speaker The Beach Club
Santa Monica, CA
2:40- 2:50 PM Beverage Break
2:55-4:00 PM Presentation 5
Chef Lawrence McFadden CMC “Future
Culinary Trends and Ritz Carlton
Standards” Director of Food and Beverage
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GOLDEN TOQUE NEWSLETTER
NOVEMBER 2007
Ritz Carlton Naples, Florida
4:00-4:10 PM Beverage Break
4:15-5:30 PM Presentation 6
To Be Announced
5:00-7:00 PM Live Hot Food Competition
With A Total Of $2,250 In Prize Money
5:30-8:00 PM Dinner Reception, Action
Stations, Live Band 7:00 PM Awards &
Sponsor Recognition
#################
THE ANTONIN CAREME MEDAL
Chef Jean Joaquin
In September, 1970, the board of directors
of the Chefs Association of the Pacific Coast
commissioned the creation of a very unusual medal.
For many months the possibility of creating
some sort of meaningful award to be presented to
individuals who, in the course of their careers had
made valuable and lasting contributions to the art of
gracious living and fine cuisine in general and the
profession of Chef de Cuisine in particular, had
been discussed among the officers and directors of
the association.
At first, a medal bearing the name and
likeness of the all-time master, Auguste Escoffier,
was strongly considered. However, it was soon
realized that the name Escoffier had been borrowed
by many groups and many awards were already
handed out in profusion on behalf of Monsieur
Escoffier.
It was Jean Joaquin, a fine craftsman and
talented artist in his own rights who first suggested
the name of Antonin Careme, the Epicurean.
Jean generously and unselfishly gave of his
valuable talent and time to create the unique design
of the likeness of Careme. The dye was cast and the
medal struck. It now rests on a blue satin ribbon
with gold border - the colors of the City of San
Francisco - safely attached to a chain.
The choice of Antonin Careme to lend his
name and likeness to this medal was an excel lent
one. We quote from the famous encyclopedia of
gastronomy the "Larousse Gastronomique."
"Careme's life is a model of probity and
nobility. Money meant nothing to him. His art alone
was important. He prized nothing but the glory of
his profession. His very concept of culinary art is in
tune with the grandeur of his character. It was
always Careme's ideal to present sumptuously the
culinary marvels with which he enriched the table
of kings - Careme should be regarded today as the
founder of 'La Grande Cuisine,' classic French
cookery. His theoretical work, his practical work as
an inventor of sauces, as pastry maker, designer and
author of works devoted to cooking, place him in an
extreme distance from all those who preceded him
in his career.
It is in the spirit of those words in which this
medal is to be awarded. Even though sponsored and
in custody of the Chefs Association of the Pacific
Coast, geographical location will not prohibit the
medal from being awarded to an eligible individual.
With this medal the officers, directors and
members of the Chefs Association of the Pacific
Coast have expressed their continuous desire to
recognize genuine dedication and effort on behalf of
fine cuisine and gracious living among the men and
women engaged in the practice of the Culinary Arts.
Thanks to the great Chef Jean Joaquin, his
talent, generosity and time that we have this great
association of The “Antonin Careme Society”.
****************************
The Peacock Story
By: Jean Joaquin, Chef, Research Consultant
Several months back at the Royal Wedding
gala dinner, Supreme de Paon a la Periqueux
(Peacock Breast with Truffles), a culinary oddity,
was served.
Some of my mostly, young culinary friends,
were curious and eagerly asked me for some
information about my past experiences with
peacocks.
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GOLDEN TOQUE NEWSLETTER
NOVEMBER 2007
During the last few months, I have had the time of
day I have neither seen or tasted. The village
my life researching the history and the importance
of the peacock in the classic cuisine.
PEACOCK: name generally applied to birds
of the Genus Pavo. The common species, Cristatus
or the Javanese Peacock Muticus are different in
color and appearance. The male peacock of the
Cristatus species is especially noted for his long
train (tail feathers) with iridescent green and gold
feathers, with eye-like markings. Greatly admired
for its colorful ornamental attributes in former
times, it is a rarity today, and has lost besides, its
gastronomical value in the culinary and epicurean
world.
One of the eccentric and extravagant stories
recorded from the Roman times was the killing of
500 peacocks using their brains to make a special
dish. When you visualize the size of the peacocks'
brains, one can realize the efforts to create such a
dish.
According to another story, Charlemagne
served thousand peacocks at one of his banquets.
The peacock's flesh when young is tender,
not unlike goose or turkey in flavor, but cooked in
various ways like pheasant.
A common practice is to substitute pheasant
for peacocks. My personal acquaintance with
peacocks calls back sweet memories of my early
life in Alsace. Our small farm was typical, that of,
fruit trees, vegetable garden and a small pond for
the ducks and geese. The pride and joy of my
parents was the barnyard with the chicken shack
and the various species. My father was an amateur
ornithologist and his star possessions were 3
peacocks, one pair javanese and one multicolored
male, full of arrogance, splendor, superiority, and
an excessive desire to be admired, mostly at the
wrong time.
I did not know of anyone in our
neighborhood who would attempt to make a meal
out of one of these birds. A few old women in the
village, including my grandmother, forever claimed
and asserted to know of a dish called "Pate de Paon
en Croute" (peacock pate in crust), which until this
sausage-maker (Charcutier) fabricated a Pate de
Paon Truffee en Crepinette a la gelee, meaning Peacock Pate with Truffles wrapped in caulfat
under aspic. More likely half and half half a
peacock, half a veal.
The only reason some peacocks are still
domesticated on this side of the world, is for their
brilliant plumage and to a lesser degree, for their
culinary reputation. The less than one-year-old birds
are palatable and not considered to have excited or
motivated the old or our new Master Chefs.
The true honor and praise should be
awarded to all the Taxidermists in the world who
preserved these birds in all their splendor, radiance
and magnificence to adorn and embellish
innumerable buffets, food displays and culinary arts
competitions throughout the world.
Chef Jean Joaquin, he notes that this cake is
a showstopper and unique here!
This cake is of German origin; known also
in Poland and Russia. I have never seen it either in
England or France. This hesitation in accepting
dishes, coming from other countries, is much to be
regretted; they are good and well understood, they
ought to find a welcome reception.
In order to bake the cake, a framework of
wood is necessary, pierced through the whole
length, something in the shape of a sugar loaf. The
frame has a spit through the middle, and is made to
stand firm with little wooden pegs. It is surrounded
with string (gross ficelle) from top to bottom, and
masked with leaves of paper, fastened to the middle
and at both ends of the frame. The spit is placed
horizontally before a good large fire for roasting,
the paper is buttered with a brush, then masked,
while the spit is turning, with some of the
preparation which has been thinned with a little
cream, so that the first layers are thin. Any of the
preparation, which does not adhere to the paper,
ought to fall into a dripping-pan placed under it, as
it has to be again poured over the frame with a
spoon; the frame must never cease turning rapidly.
As soon as the first layers are hardened into a crust,
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GOLDEN TOQUE NEWSLETTER
NOVEMBER 2007
more layers are laid on; the same work is continued,
A few days later the same guy stuck his head
until it has attained the thickness of two
'centimeters': it then begins to get bumpy and like
rockwork, which must be distributed as evenly as
possible, augmented in some parts and decreased in
others, the pit turning round all the time with great
swiftness.
When the cake has attained the required
thickness, and the surface become uneven and
indented, as represented in the drawing, the heat of
the fire is diminished, that the paste may get a light
brown color. The cake is then withdrawn from the
fire, to mask it with a vanilla icing sugar, diluted
with 'kirschwasser', or maraschino. When the cake
is glazed, the ends must be cut even, and must still
be turned in a horizontal position, until quite cold, if
allowed to rest motionless, the paste already baked
would break beneath its own weight. In order to
remove the cake from its frame, it must be perfectly
cold, or it would be dangerous to make the attempt.
Before turning it out of the mould, the string must
be cut, and unrolled from the frame, then the paper,
and last of all the cake, which by this means has
become quite disengaged from the frame-work.
The cake is placed on a stand, with a
centrepiece, which helps to support it. The summit
is crowned with a small corbeille, or some other
subject of the same kind.
The EPLIOQUE: I know that a few of our
colleagues in large hotels and clubs have been for
years guarding with their lives in the back of the
kitchen locked up in a closet, a stuffed peacock. Be
good to him; the bird is more impressive stuffed on
top of the table then cooked in the plate. My
personal advice: Get rid of this beast.
To Prince Charles, the future King of
England and his Princess, a long life and many
more peacocks.
##############################
in the door and asked, "How long before I can get a
haircut?" The barber looked around at the shop and
said, "About 3 hours."
The guy left.
A week later the same guy stuck his head in
the shop and asked, "How long before I can get a
haircut?" The barber looked around the shop and
said, "About an hour and half."
The guy left.
The barber turned to a friend and said, "Hey,
Bill, do me a favor. Follow that guy and see where
he goes. He keeps asking how long he has to wait
for a haircut, but then he doesn't ever come back."
A little while later, Bill returned to the shop,
laughing hysterically.
The barber asked, "So where does that guy go
when he leaves?"
Bill looked up, tears in his eyes and said,
"Your house."
A guy stuck his head into a barbershop and
asked, "How long before I can get a haircut?" The
barber looked around the shop full of customers
and said, "About 2 hours."
The guy left.
*****************
Pass the Butter ~ ~ this is interesting .
Margarine was originally manufactured to
fatten turkeys. When it killed the turkeys, the
people who had put all the money into the
research wanted a payback so they put their
heads together to figure out what to do with
this product to get their money back.
It was a white substance with no food
appeal so they added the yellow coloring and
sold it to people to use in place of butter. How
do you like it? They have come out with some
clever new flavorings.
DO YOU KNOW...the difference between
margarine and butter? Read on to the
end...gets very interesting!
Both have the same amount of calories.
Butter is slightly higher in saturated fats at 8
grams compared to 5 grams. Eating margarine
can increase heart disease in women by 53%
over eating the same amount of butter,
according to a recent Harvard Medical Study.
Eating Butter increases the absorption of many
other nutrients in other foods. Butter has many
nutritional benefits where margarine has a few
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GOLDEN TOQUE NEWSLETTER
NOVEMBER 2007
only because they are added!
door where a drunken stranger, standing in the
Butter tastes much better than margarine and it
can enhance the flavors of other foods. Butter
has been around for centuries where
margarine has been around for less than 100
years.
And now, for Margarine ...Very high in
trans fatty acids. Triple risk of coronary heart
disease. Increases total cholesterol and LDL
(this is the bad cholesterol) and lowers HDL
cholesterol, (the good cholesterol) Increases
the risk of cancers up to five fold. Lowers
quality of breast milk. Decreases immune
response. Decreases insulin response.
And here's the most disturbing fact....
HERE IS THE PART THAT IS VERY
INTERESTING!
Margarine is but ONE MOLECULE away
from being PLASTIC... This fact alone was
enough to have me avoiding margarine for life
and anything else that is hydrogenated (this
means hydrogen is added, changing the
molecular structure of the substance).
You can try this yourself:
Purchase a tub of margarine and leave it in
your garage or shaded area.
Within a couple of days you will note a couple
of things:
* No flies, not even those pesky fruit flies
will go near it (that should tell you something)
* It does not rot or smell differently
because it has no nutritional value
* Nothing will grow on it. Even those
teeny weenie microorganisms will not a find a
home to grow.
Why? Because it is nearly plastic.
Would you melt your Tupperware and spread
that on your toast? Share This With Your
Friends..... (If you want to "butter them up")!
########################
You Gotta Love a Drunk !
A man and his wife are awakened, at 3
o'clock in the morning by a loud pounding on
the door. The man gets up and goes to the
pouring rain, is
asking for a push. "Not a chance," says the
husband, "it is 3 o'clock in the morning! He
slams the door and returns to bed.
"Who was that?" asked his wife.
"Just some drunk guy asking for a push," he
answers. "Did you help him? She asks.
"No, I did not, it is 3 o'clock in the morning and
it is pouring out there!" "Well, you have a short
memory," says his wife. "Can't you remember,
about three months ago when we broke down,
and those two guys helped us? I think you
should help him, and you should be ashamed
of
yourself!"
The man does as he is told, gets dressed,
and goes out into the pounding rain. He calls
out into the dark, "Hello, are you still there?"
"Yes" comes back the answer. "Do you still
need a push?", calls out the husband. "Yes,
please!" comes the reply from the dark. "Where
are you?" asks the husban "Over here on the
swing!", replies the drunk.
Ask a stupid question, get a stupid
answer
Yesterday, I was buying a large bag of
Purina dog chow for Athena the wonder
dog at Walmart and was about to check
out.
A woman behind me asked if I had
a dog. On impulse, I told her that no, I didn't
have a dog; I was starting the Purina Diet
again.
Although I probably shouldn't,
because I'd ended up in the hospital
last time. BUT, I'd lost 50 pounds before
I awakened in an intensive care ward with
tubes coming out of most of my orifices and
IVs in both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a
perfect diet and that the way that it works is
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GOLDEN TOQUE NEWSLETTER
NOVEMBER 2007
to load your pants pockets with Purina
ripped open the door to the cage, flung her in
nuggets and simply eat one or two every
time you feel hungry; the food is
nutritionally complete, so I was going to try
it again. (I have to mention here that
practically everyone in the line was by now
enthralled with my story.)
Horrified, she asked if I ended up in
intensive care because the dog food
poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a
curb to sniff an Irish Setter's ass and a car
hit us both.
I thought the guy behind her was
going to have a heart attack, he was
laughing so hard! WALMART won't let me
shop there anymore!!!
####################
with the gorilla and slammed the cage door
shut.
"Now.Tell him you have a headache."
#########################
A man and his wife were spending the
day at the zoo. She was wearing a loose fitting,
pink dress, sleeveless with straps. He was
wearing his usual jeans and T-shirt.
As they walked through the ape exhibit,
they passed in front of a large, silver back
gorilla. Noticing the wife, the gorilla went crazy.
He jumped on the bars, and holding on with
one hand and 2 feet, he grunted and pounded
his chest with his free hand.
He was obviously excited at the pretty
lady in the pink dress. The husband, noticing
the excitement, thought this was funny. He
suggested that his wife tease the poor fellow
some more by puckering her lips and wiggling
her bottom.
She played along and the
gorilla got even more excited, making noises
that would wake the dead. Then the husband
suggested that she let one of her straps fall to
show a little more skin. She did... And the
gorilla was about to tear the bars down.
Now... Show your thighs and sort of fan
your dress at him," he said. This drove the
gorilla absolutely crazy, and he started doing
flips. Then the husband grabbed his wife,
I CANNOT BELIEVE IT IS THAT
TIME AGAIN AND ANOTHER
YEAR HAS PASSED SO FAST.
TO ALL WE WISH YOU AND
YOURS A VERY MERRY
CHRISTMAS AND A HEALTHY
NEW YEAR.
################
My e-mail: is jclary4@cox.net You can e-mail
me some news for the newsletter!!
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HONORABLE ORDER OF THE GOLDEN TOQUE NEWS LETTER
JUNE 2007
Las Vegas, NV
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