Some people are just obsessive about things
By Shelton Young
Holidays are rough for me. I have to come up with something to write about in four days.
Luckily, I have something I’ve been wanting to share with you for awhile. It’s about a fanatical group of
guys with a common single-minded zeal.
“Fanatical” by definition is “to be obsessively concerned about something.”
Here, I’m talking about a dedicated group of waterfowlers. Now Mark, Jason, John O. and I are teetering on
the edge of compulsive behavior when it comes to our waterfowling. But these guys are who the term
obsessive was created for.
How else would you describe someone with so many decoys they don’t know how many decoys they have,
and just for the heck of it, buy more! Of course the logic of that is understandable, they were on sale!
Ladies, you understand don’t you? Doesn’t matter how many of anything you have (shoes, purses), if they’re
“on sale” you only look at what you save, not what you spend.
The next guy just likes to shoot! Gun holds three shells, he’s goin’ to shoot three times. Hit the duck or goose
on the first shot, doesn’t matter, there’s two more shells in the gun and the trigger is getting’ pulled again,
then again! This is the guy who should have stock in some shot shell company!
The youngest of the group is the type that’ll strip off in freezing weather, jump in freezing water and take a
swim, to recover a bird he shot. Then as the cold snaps his strength and he sees his life flash before his eyes,
he comes to the realization that if you’re almost 6-foot tall, and the water’s about 3 feet deep, You just stand
up!
And, as for the incident with his waders, well, there’s a limit as to what even I’ll talk about!
The old guy of this group bought a new duck boat for this season. Of course to have a genuine duck boat,
you’ve got to have a real duck blind attached.
So, this group decides that a “store bought” blind was just a waste of money, the kind of money that could be
better put to use buying more “on sale” waterfowling stuff.
Their project started with detailed, computer generated plans. Exact measurements, angles and a parts list all
generated by the youngest in the group.
They even had the perfect place to build the blind, as long as Dad didn’t mind parking his truck outside
instead of in his garage, er, “fabrication facility.”
I stopped by as construction of the blind started and was very impressed with the plans. The areas of
contemplation, consideration, construction, supervision and labor overlapped on a regular basis. But when I
checked back a week later the blind was taking form.
Then I saw the Dad at Walmart and asked how their project was coming along. “Well, I’m still parking my
truck outside” was his response. Seems now they’re sewing on, by hand, stubble straps. *Stubble straps hold
vegetation and add to the overall camo effect of the blind. Course the straps are right at 20-feet long, and
there’ll be 10-12 of them on the blind, so that’s a lot of sewing.
The upside is that they’ll have a top blind that’s better, and less expensive, than anything “store bought.”
The downside is that we have a 60-day waterfowling season and so far they’ve spent a lot of time buildin’
instead of huntin’.
If you want insight into how waterfowlers think, how close passion and obsession really are and who I’ve
been talking about, just check out www.kyduckmen@yahoo.com.
And, as a waterfowler, I too have a duckboat! It’s 16-feet of dinged-up aluminum painted a Desert Storm,
surplus paint, “kinda” brown camo. Most of the rivets are okay and as long as the battery holds a charge, the
bilge pump works and everyone has a bailing bucket and life vest we “should” be o.k.
Besides, the shortest of the Quack Shack Crew is six feet tall. So, as long as we hunt in water that’s not much
over 4-foot deep, we should be in good shape!
I even have a duck blind! It’s a few pieces of bent conduit with a hunk of WW2 camo netting thrown over it.
Planning for my blind build was extensive and detailed. It went something like this: “Hey Mark, think this’ll
fool a duck?” After a 10-15 second appraisal Marks response was “Probably not, now let’s go hunting.”
The weather’s been what I consider to be way too warm for this time of year. It should be just a little above
freezing, and a dusting of snow wouldn’t hurt!
Please understand: I don’t have stock in any utility company, I’m not vested in a cold weather gear
distributership and I’m not into self-abuse.
It’s just that the hunting won’t get good till it gets cold.
And, besides, I have all this neat stuff designed to keep me warm and I want to see if it works!
Our Christmas holiday was about the birth of Christ, fellowship with family and friends plus a few days off
from work/school, so we could go hunting of course!
Now, we have New Year’s coming up. This one is pretty much a red solo cup sort of time, party, party,
party!
I’m not passing judgment on anyone who likes to party and consume some alcohol, as long as you’re legal.
However, I do condemn anyone who drinks excessively, acts stupid and especially those who try to drive
while impaired!
Get caught driving drunk: Best scenario is you wake up in jail. Worst scenario is someone ends up hurt, or
dead!
It’s real simple; if you’re goin’ to be drinkin” don’t be drivin’!
Guess that’s it for now. Get out and enjoy what Mother Nature has to offer. Stay safe and I’ll see ya next
week…or next year!