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Megan Zar
Professor Lee
Preface
This paper was extremely difficult for me to write. Usually, writing is easy for me,
but this essay was not. To begin with, it started off with finding out what I should even
write about. I had no idea what to write. I changed my mind about my thesis statement
many times before I actually started to write the paper. Reading many articles, I tried
finding similar information, so that I can create a thesis. However, that process did not
work out. Moreover, the discussion in class where everyone gave their topics of their
essay was very helpful for me because it gave me many ideas. After I finally decided
that I will write about the deconstruction of the accomplishment of natural growth versus
concerted cultivation, I went on the databases to see if I can find scholarly sources
about that topic. Having trouble, I emailed Professor Lee because I was not able to find
articles about the accomplishment of natural growth. I noticed that only Annette Lareau
used those terms, so I could not use them to search for articles. Professor Lee gave me
other options like authoritarian and authoritative parenting. I found two really good
articles that spoke about the accomplishment of natural growth. Therefore, I gathered
more information and put together the little pieces I learned about the accomplishment
of natural growth in order to discuss the benefits. I printed out the articles to highlight
the main points that I wanted to describe in my paper. Even though I struggled along the
way, I still tried my best in writing this paper. I knew that if I worked hard enough to put
my thoughts together, I can get the job done!
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Megan Zar
English 110
Professor Lee
22 November 2010
Deconstruction: Benefits of Natural Growth Versus Concerted Cultivation
Parents tend to raise their children in different ways. Parents either raise their
children with concerted cultivation or natural growth depending on the families social
class. In Lareau's eyes, concerted cultivation is defined as the act of children attending
extracurricular activities and learning about useful skills that can help him/her in the
future as well as having great language skills. Meanwhile, with natural growth, the child
has more control over his/her fun activities and will not learn some of the skills that
children do with concerted cultivation, but rather learn from their own activities. If one is
born into a middle class family, he/she is raised with concerted cultivation. On the flip
side, if one if born into a working or poor class family, he/she is raised with natural
growth. However, that does not mean that one method is better than the other. Both of
the child-rearing techniques have advantages that result from them. Annette Lareau's
novel Unequal Childhoods focuses on the advantages of concerted cultivation, but
incorporates some benefits of the accomplishment of natural growth. Rebecca Ang's
"Authoritarian Parenting Style in Asian Societies: A Cluster-Analytic Investigation”, Diana
Baumrind's “Effects of Authoritative Parental Control on Child Behavior”, and TW Chan's
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“Parenting Style and Youth Outcome in the UK” all discuss some of the benefits of the
accomplishment of natural growth.
In her novel, Annette Lareau demonstrates many examples that incorporates
many benefits of concerted cultivation. To begin with, she illustrates a strong sense of
entitlement in the children. For instance, in chapter six, Lareau summarizes the lifestyle
of Alexander Williams. Alexander Williams comes from a middle class family. He has a
strong sense of entitlement. Alexander's parents want him to feel comfortable
expressing his feelings and remarks. Without telling Alexander directly, his parents
speak to him in a way to prove to Alexander that he has the ability to ask people
anything. For example, Alexander sat with his mom in the car on the way to a doctor's
appointment. His mother told Alexander that he should be thinking of questions to ask
the doctor, and he can ask the doctor anything his heart desires. By telling Alexander
that he should not be shy and that he can ask whatever he wants, his mother implies
that he has the right to speak up (Lareau 124). Also, she role models the idea that he
should prepare what he wants to say to people with higher authority beforehand.
Furthermore, the doctor told Alexander that he is in the ninety-fifth percentile in height,
and Alexander had no idea what that meant, so he interrupted the doctor, displaying an
act of entitlement. Alexander proves that he has the right to speak and to tell his
thoughts to adults and people of authority. This action makes him feel very confident.
Furthermore, as a child, my mother would constantly tell me not to be shy
because being shy will get me nowhere in life. I should express my feelings and
comments with confidence. She always said that everyone has a right to his/her
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opinions. My mom said, “I want my children to all be outspoken” (Zar). Every parent
should do the same for their children. He/She should make sure that his/her child is
confident by speaking up. Make the child feel like they have a role in life and people
care about what they have to say. For instance, my older sister was always outgoing.
Now, she received what she wanted and has a well paying job. She earns more money
than my mother does. However, I am not as outgoing as my sister and I barely have a
job. To conclude, concerted cultivation comes with a sense of entitlement that can be
very helpful for children.
In addition to a sense of entitlement, children raised with concerted cultivation
gain important factors from their experiences that will help them in the future. For
example, Annette Lareau wrote about Garrett Tallinger. Garrett Tallinger attends two
soccer teams, baseball team, basketball team and swim team. He also plays the
saxophone and piano. From going to these activities, Garrett Tallinger makes more
friends. Making more friends is always a good thing. In the future, if Garrett Tallingerl
has problems and needs assistance from others, he can always call up a friend. For
someone like Garrett, he will need friends in the moments in his life where he is
struggling because he rarely bonds with family. Lareau states, “For Garrett, playing
soccer is 'more of a priority' than spending time with relatives, but the Tallinger's do not
care about kinship ties” (Lareau 58). Even though he does not care about kinship ties,
he does care about his teammates. The more friends, the merrier. Also, Garrett learns
about team work. Throughout all the sports he plays, he learns that he can't score a
goal without the help of his team members.
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The accomplishment of natural growth comes with many advantages as well. In
Unequal Childhoods, Lareau demonstrates a few of them. In chapter four of the novel,
Tyrec Taylor was described as a nine year old boy who is a part of a working class
family. Tyrec was only involved in two extracurricular activities: Sunday School and
Vacation Bible School. However, he really wanted to join the school football team. After
the season ended, he realized that because he made a bad commitment he never has
time to play with his friends. Therefore, Tyrec never joined the team again. He liked
playing with his friends on the streets much more. He learned many skills because there
was no person in authority telling him what to do. Lareau states, “Because the group
functions without group monitoring, he learns how to construct and sustain friendships
on his own and how to organize and negotiate” (Lareau 79). Even though Tyrec is not a
part of a formal organized activity he still learns important factors of life that will help him
in the future. Also, since Tyrec Taylor and his friends create the games themselves, it
gives him “opportunities to develop skills in peer mediation, conflict management,
personal responsibility and management” (Lareau 80). For instance, when Tyrec was
playing the volleyball game with his friends, the person had to jump before hitting the
ball. A conflict arose because of of Tyrec's friends just picked his feet off the ground and
did not actually jump. Therefore, they went and confirmed the rules with one of their
other friends to see who was right and wrong. Instead of physically arguing, they argued
verbally. This act improves their social skills with peers.
Furthermore, since I was not stressed by many extracurricular activities, I had
time to spare as well. I would play doll house with my best friend Michelle. I learned that
sharing is caring. Also, one day I borrowed my friend Michelle's Barbie doll. I broke the
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leg off before I gave it back to her. After that experience, I realized that I should be more
responsible with the objects that I borrow from others. My mother thought that it was
important to incorporate both natural growth and concerted cultivation, so I can learn the
different ideas that come out of both (Zar). For example, in that situation I learned how
to be more responsible. Children raised with natural growth gain from experiences even
with no formal organized activity.
Rebecca Ang and Dion Goh wrote an article called, "Authoritarian Parenting
Style in Asian Societies: A Cluster-Analytic Investigation” and it focused on the benefits
of authoritarian parenting or in other words the accomplish of natural growth. When
one is raised with natural growth, the parents usually use directives to tell the children
what to do. The Asians find that very helpful. “Chao (1994) introduced the notion of
chiao shun or ‘‘training’’ which emphasizes the importance of parental control and
monitoring” (Ang). They use the term “training” to relate to the term “directives”. The
Asians believe that the use of directives emphasizes obedience, self-discipline, and the
need to do well in school (Ang). Ang also states that, “Tobin, Wu, and Davidson (1989)
explained that the term guan literally means ‘‘to govern’’, and further explained that the
term has a positive connotation in China because it can mean ‘‘to care for’’, ‘‘to love’’, as
well as ‘‘to govern’’” (Ang). Therefore, the term guan is important to understand in the
context of parenting.
While doing their research, Rebecca Ang and Dion Goh found a positive
relationship between authoritarian parenting style and independence and self-assertiveness in a sample of African–American children (Ang). They saw that African
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American children were accustomed to doing things on their own because their parents
were never involved. Instead of going to their parents about how they are upset about a
grade they received in class, they would encounter the teacher on their own.
Children raised with natural growth are often punished more frequently than
children raised with concerted cultivation. However, punishment can be effective at
times. Diana Baumrind states that, “Under conditions prevailing in the home setting,
punishment may be quite effective in helping to accomplish particular objectives”
(Baumrind 896). There were five main objectives that Diana Baumrind pointed out. She
stated that punishment will result in:
a more rapid re-establishment of affectional involvement on both sides following
emotional release, high resistance to similar deviation by siblings who vicariously
experience punishment, emulation of the aggressive parent resulting in prosocial
assertive behavior, lessening of guilt reactions to transgression, and increased
ability of the child to endure punishment in the service of a desired end.
(Baumrind 896)
However, even though punishment can be effective, people should not purposly punish
their children to gain these outcomes. Diana Baumrind does not promise that every
child that is punished will turn out with those advantages, however it is possible. Also,
Baumrind states that punishment “suppress[es] unacceptable responses even when
these responses are not eliminated, and so to require continued reinforcement”
(Baumrind 896). Parents never want to completely disregard a response, but they want
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to suppress them in certain places. Even though children hate the act of getting
punished, it still have some positive effects of them.
Furthermore, children raised with natural growth have more free time, so they
can bond with their parents often. Sometimes, this bond brings the parents and the child
together. Some children will see their parents as a friend. Because of this, children
raised with natural growth tend to tell their parents about problems they are facing. Most
of these problems relate to health and behavior. Chan's article about parenting styles in
the United Kingdom discusses this concept. A researcher used questions from the
BHPS Youth Panel to figure out if children use drugs or when they were in a fight. Chan
gives three example questions:
Have you ever tried a cigarette, even if it was only a single puff? (yes/no). Do any
of your friends ever use illegal drugs, such as smoking cannabis, or taking
ecstasy, cocaine or crack? (none, few most). How often in the past month have
you had a fight with someone that involved physical violence, such as hitting,
punching, or kicking? (none, 1, 2-5, 6-9, 10 or more). (Chan 14)
After the researcher conducted this study, he/she figured out that “compared with
teenagers with authoritative parents, those with authoritarian parents and especially
those with permissive parents are more likely to report the problem behaviour that we
consider in this section” (Chan 15). Since children raised with natural growth are more
comfortable in speaking to their parents, they are the ones who actually tell their parents
that they are facing a problem. Children raised with concerted cultivation are scared to
talk to their parents about their issues when it comes to health and behavior.
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Children are raised differently depending on the family's social class. Parents
raise children in the middle class with concerted cultivation. On the other hand, children
in the working class or poor class are raised with the accomplishment of natural growth.
Both concerted cultivation and the accomplishment of natural growth have benefits.
Annette Lareau's novel, Unequal Childhoods, mostly describes the advantages of
concerted cultivation. Rebecca Ang's "Authoritarian Parenting Style in Asian Societies: A
Cluster-Analytic Investigation”, Diana Baumrind's “Effects of Authoritative Parental
Control on Child Behavior”, and TW Chan's “Parenting Style and Youth Outcome in the
UK” all prove that the accomplishment of natural growth comes with many benefits as
well. Hopefully, in the future, parents will understand that not only one way is right to
raise a child. Both techniques guide the children in the right path for the future.
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Works Cited
Ang, Rebecca, and Dion Goh. "Authoritarian Parenting Style in Asian Societies: A
Cluster- Analytic Investigation*." Contemporary Family Therapy: An International
Journal 28.1 ( 2006): 131-151. Academic Search Complete. EBSCO. Web. 20
Nov. 2010.
Baumrind, Diana. “Effects of Authoritative Parental Control on Child Behavior.” Child
Development. (1966) 37 (4) 887-907.
Chan, TW and Koo A. “Parenting Style and Youth Outcome in the UK.” Conference
Paper. University of Oxford. (2008).
Lareau, Annette. Unequal Childhoods. London, England: University of California Press,
Ltd., 2003. Print.
Zar, Frances. Personal Interview. 17 October 2010
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Artifacts
I was doing my homework in this picture.
I was enrolled in a dance class.
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Questions For Parents
Megan: Were you raised with concerted cultivation or natural growth?
Mom: I was raised with natural growth. Back in Iran, extracurricular activities were not
so popular. Therefore, my parents believed that they were not necessary.
Megan: Who encouraged you to stay focused with school work?
Mom: School was always important to me. I do not believe anyone really encouraged it,
but it was the thing to do and I liked going to school. Since there was not much to do
after school, except watching television, I actually enjoyed concentrating on homework.
Megan: How were the educations my siblings and I received different/similar as a child?
Mom: They all received the same education from the same schools. Based on their
abilities and personalities, they are all exceeding differently at school.
Megan: After reading the essay, was Megan raised with concerted cultivation or natural
growth?
Mom: Megan was raised with both concerted cultivation and natural growth. She has all
of her family close to her. She belongs to a very close-knit community and has lots of
friends around her.
Megan: As a child, did you have the chance to socialize with people of higher authority?
Mom: Other than my teachers, no.
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Megan: Was your parents involved with your education? (homework, good grades)
Mom: I would ask my father's help if I had to write essays. Sometimes, he helped me
with math problems as well. Both my parents finished grade school.
Megan: Did you raise Megan, the same way your parents raised you? (either concerted
cultivation or natural growth)
Mom: I definitely did not. I believe that times have changed. What is available to our
children now, was not available in my times.
Megan: Was money an issue for your family when you were a child?
Mom: I never thought of this as a child, since I never really asked for much. We lived
under normal circumstances. My family and I were happy with what we had. Money was
not an issue.
Megan: Were you disciplined by your parents when you did something wrong?
Mom: If I was disciplined, it was always by my father, never my mother.
Megan: Were you able to negotiate with your parents? (For example, if you asked for
something and they said no, and you ask again and they said yes)
Mom: No, my parents were really strict. Everything went their way. I was not able to
negotiate.
Megan: Did you bond/spend time with your family? Give example.
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Mom: I was raised with four siblings, two of whom that are close to my age. We would
always play street games with our neighbors. Sometimes, we played Monopoly
together. Sometimes, I would sleep at my grandparents house with all my cousins. I
loved spending time with family. Partly because that was the only thing we had to do
other than homework.
Megan: Did you ever go outside and interact with your friends without parent
supervision?
Mom: My siblings and I did that everyday without parent supervision.
Megan: Were you able to walk far away from your house when you were young?
Mom: Yes, I remember walking to school or at my aunt’s house even an hour away
walking.
Megan: Did you allow Megan to walk far away from home when she was young?
Mom: No, I did not feel safe by letting her do that.
Megan: Did you struggle with money while raising your own children? If so, did you talk
to Megan about it?
Mom: Thankfully, not yet. Megan lost her father about six years ago due to heart failure.
In the beginning, it was difficult to know if I would be able to manage the money
situation, but thankfully, I have. I did not speak to Megan about money. However, I think
she knows that money is precious and every penny is worth something.
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Megan: Were you involved in Megan's education?
Mom: Yes. I would try to help Megan with homework. I would attend most school
functions and parent-teacher conferences to talk about how she is doing in school.
Megan: As a child, were you told that you have the ability to ask anyone anything? (right
to speak)
Mom: I do not recall being told anything on this subject, but I was outspoken to a certain
level.
Megan: Are there any things you would have done differently in raising Megan?
Mom: No. I believe that I raised all my children in the same manner. Even though I
learned new things as I move along, I still believe that I did the best in raising Megan
with the conditions that we went through.
Megan: Do you think it is important for Megan to spend time with her family?
Mom: I think it is extremely important for Megan to spend time with family. In our family,
its customary that we all get together every Friday night. My sisters and brothers come
to my parents house with their kids and we get together for a special dinner. Adults and
children both have a fun time interacting with each other.
Megan: Did you have more of a hectic schedule or more free time? How did you spend
your free time?
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Mom: My life was balanced with both. However, if I had to choose, I had more free time.
I played with friends on the streets in my neighborhood.
Megan: Looking back on the way you were raised, would you change anything?
Mom: I wish my parents were more open-minded about college education. They
believed college was not necessary. I had to beg to get educated.
Megan: Would want to change anything about the way your older children were raised?
Do you see those changes in the way you raised your younger children?
Mom: I raised them all the same way. I have three children with three different
personalities. The upbringing of my children has nothing to do with their personalities.
Megan: What was your desired result? Do you think my child rearing was effective?
Mom: My children turned out the way I wanted them to. I believe my child rearing was
very effective. I would not change anything about them.
Megan: What was your educational process?
Mom: I finished elementary school back in Iran and attended high school in Queens. I
went to Baruch College, but unfortunately had to stop since I did not have a visa at the
time.
Megan: How did religion play a role in the way were raised? In the way you raised your
children?
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Mom: My parents kept an average religion in our household. I learned to read and write
in hebrew as a child. I have raised my children the same way. I believe that religion to a
certain extent gives children structure.
Megan: What kind of neighborhood did you grow up in?
Mom: I grew up in a children-friendly neighborhood in Iran.
Megan: How did the balance between mother/father play a role? (Or if a single parent)
how did being a single parent play a role?
Mom: When my husband was alive, he earned most of the income in our household. He
was a working father and I was a full-time housewife. As a single parent, I try to keep
everything organized and juggle between outside work and housework. My children are
adults now, so they do not need so much of my attention.
Megan: How did your community impact the way you raised me?
Mom: We live in a very close-knit community. Ancestors of this community were all from
a holy city in Iran called, “Mashad”. Years ago, Mashadi jews were being forced to
convert to Islam. Up front, my family and others would pretend that we converted.
However, we would secretly keep our judaism.
Megan: If you were born in another country, how would you have raised your children if
you stayed there? Did your culture play a role in your child rearing?
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Mom: Since Muslims were forcing Mashadi Jews to intermarry. I would have to namesake my daughters for someone's son, so that the Muslim's would not ask for their
hand. This is how we became really close.
Megan: How has ethnicity play a role in the way you raised your children?
Mom: My culture and ethnicity is to be very family oriented and being in this community,
we have many close friends around us.