Love and Mate Selection

Love and Mate Selection
• Love:
– A feeling and behavior
– Definitions vary across different social contexts
– Respect and caring are common denominators
– Different than sexual desire and lust

Love and Mate Selection
• Theories of love
– Biological: maintains that love is founded in biology, chemistry and evolution
– Sociological: culture is responsible for how love is expressed.

Love and Mate Selection
• Sternberg’s Triangle Theory
– Intimacy
– Passion
– Decision/commitment

Love and Mate Selection
• Social exchange
– Used to analyze love
– Rewards and costs and varies in different stages of life

Love and Mate Selection
• Reiss’ Wheel of Love: Four stages that move a person from attraction to love
– Rapport
– Self-disclosure
– Mutual dependency
– Need fullfillment

Love and Mate Selection
• Functions of love
– Ensure human survival
– Prolong life
– Enhance health
– Improve quality of life
– fun

Love and Mate Selection
• Filter theory: Dating narrows the pool of potentials
– Further narrowed by:
• Geography
• Age
• Social networks
• Values
• Sexual orientation
• attractiveness

Love and Mate Selection
• “Marriage Market”
– Arranged marriages: Parents use social and cultural factors are used to determine mate.
– Free-choice culture: individuals choose their own mater but often seek approval.

Love and Mate Selection
• More choices and methods but most mate selection occurs by endogamy rules.
– Endogamy: marrying within one’s own social group
– Exogamy: marrying outside your social group

Love and Mate Selection
• Hypergamy (marriage with someone from a higher socioeconomic background) is more characteristic of women than men.

Love and Mate Selection
• Functions of love
– Ensure human survival
– Prolong life
– Enhance health
– Improve quality of life
– fun

Love and Mate Selection
• Barriers to experiencing love
– Internalized myths about love
– Mass society discourages face to face interaction
– Social inequality impedes development of love
– Culture values individualism
– Views of homosexual couples not being in love and less satisfying

Love and Mate Selection
• Problems with love
– Jealousy
– Narcissism (self importance)
– Threats of withdrawal of love
– Guilt