Canals DBQ 2015: How to Improve Your DBQ
1. General Notes:
a. Overall, you did well! While you may not be pleased with your grade, you should be very proud
of the progress you are making. Many of you just had a few small things to fix or your score on
the essay (and grade) would have been much higher. Please take the time to look over any
comments in your essay and the rubric to see where you need to improve to earn rubric points. If
you don’t read the comments, you’re not going to improve.
b. Use a table or chart to plan out your essay!!! Organizing your essay before you write it is really
important. If you have a chart, that is easier to use rather than flipping back and forth through
your papers each time searching for a particular document for just doing a topic sentence.
c. Many of you stated that you wished you would have planned better. How will you accomplish
this in future DBQs? What tactic will you use instead?
d. 90% of you said you wished you knew the formula better. So, go fix this! This is something that
is entirely in your control. You will have more DBQs to write in class as well as on the AP
exam, so they aren’t going to go away.
e. Know the rubric! If you have 2 minutes left to write, then think of what on the rubric will get
you more points – like finishing topic sentences or doing evidence instead of a 3rd missing
document or another point of view!
f. Do the essay corrections! It will raise you grade but more importantly help you improve on your
essay writing.
g. Again, you cannot use the words positive, negative, neutral, biased, or unbiased in your essay!
h. A few of your referenced South America in your evidence and/or missing document sentences.
Remember the Panama Canal is in Central America, not South America, so unless you tie your
argument to the Panama Canal’s impact on South America, your argument is invalid.
2. Thesis:
a. Almost everyone got the thesis point. If you didn’t, it was usually because you didn’t have the
formula memorized or you forgot the dates, key words from the prompt, or didn’t list appropriate
groups in the thesis. Many people made small errors that prevented them from getting this point.
This is an easy thing to fix.
3. Addressing all the Documents: (Topic Sentences)
a. This is done in the topic sentence of each body paragraph. For example: Documents 2, 5, 6, and
10 show the political motivations involved in the construction of the Suez and Panama
canals because… Notice that I worked the prompt into the topic sentence (motivations involved
in the construction of the Suez and Panama canals). Also, notice that I left out challenges, these
documents were not challenges, and therefore you do not need it in this topic sentence.
b. Notice the time period does not have to go in the topic sentence! Save time and leave it out.
c. You must address all of the documents! Many students ran out of time and did not get to their
third or fourth body paragraph. If you had just written the topic sentence (even if you didn’t get
to the rest of the body paragraph), you could have earned an additional point on the rubric. If
you start to run out of time, at least write the topic sentences!
4. Supports Thesis with Appropriate Evidence from all Documents:
a. Do not put the time period in your evidence sentences. Save the time and leave it out!
b. Make sure your evidence supports your thesis. For example, Document 2 shows political
motivations involved in the construction of the Suez and Panama canals because Ferdinand
de Lesseps is trying to convince the Egyptians how imperative the construction of the Suez
Canal will be to increase Ottoman and French power and control over trade. Notice it isn’t
just a summary of what the document says. It explains what Document 2 has to do with the
political motivations involved in the construction of the Suez Canal (or you could also argue this
document economically).
c. Do not summarize the documents and do not make up information!
d. You cannot quote the documents. This means using quotation marks or using the same words.
Certain words and phrases stick out. For example, many of you talked about “Egyptian
pharaohs” or “national enterprise” instead of explaining what that means. When you quote, you
automatically lose evidence points from that document. You must paraphrase the documents in
your own words.
e. The most common mistake was document 7, saying that the Americans were invading the
Indians. This document is warning about U.S. economic interference in Central America with
the construction of the Panama Canal and comparing it to the U.S. role with the Amerindians.
f. Another document that was missed was document 8, saying that the table represented the total
cost of construction of the Panama Canal. The document was giving the cost for fighting disease
in the region.
5. Point of View:
a. Put the name of the author in the POV sentence. Many of you just said “the author.” Look at the
source line and use the name they give you! Make sure you read it carefully. Many of you put
Ismail Pasha as the author of document 5, when in reality it is from a French magazine.
b. POV is why that individual person (the author) would care or be concerned or be pleased. What
would he/she have to personally gain? What is his/her role? Many of you were so close to the
POV and had great explanations of how a country would be affected – keep that part and just add
in why the author would personally care? For example, De Lesseps feels persuasive in
convincing the Egyptians to build the Suez canal because as a French developer of the
canal he sees the potential imperial gains the French can make off the canal, and in return
gain fame and possibly fortune.
6. Grouping/Analysis:
a. Make sure you use and explain your groups correctly. For example, many of you used social
motivations and/or consequences but how you explained it was actually a political
motivation/challenge.
b. Grouping analysis should also be in your topic sentence. Documents 2, 5, 6, and 10 show the
political motivations involved in the construction of the Suez and Panama canals because
nationalism fueled multiple countries to seek opportunities to increase their power and
status in the world. Notice how I previewed the generic political motivations of Documents 2,
5, 6, and 10 as part of ‘the because.’ I won’t repeat the same thing in my evidence sentences.
7. Missing Voice:
a. The missing document must address what sentence 2 of the prompt says. Missing documents
must be about (motivations and challenges involved in the construction of these canals). Many
of you made no mention of the canals at all in these sentences. You must address what they tell
you to address with missing document.
b. The missing document cannot be any document – it needs to be a specific type of person or a
statistical piece of information. For example, upper class citizen or lower class citizen is too
vague. Be more specific to what applies to the document and essay topic. In addition, it is better
to put where this person is from – a region or a country – to strengthen your idea.
c. On the other hand, you also do not want to be too specific. For example, the son of a merchant
traveling from East Asia to Europe… It will cause you to get off topic and not make your point
valid.
d. Many of you gave missing documents of people already in the documents. For example, a
government official. Document 3 and 4 are government officials from Great Britain and Egypt.
The idea is that the viewpoint is missing…
e. Do not put a specific type of document, such as a diary from a Spanish American. That will just
lead to no credit. Stick with a type of person for missing document unless you are doing
something for general statistics – chart, graph, table, etc…