Practical Ministries Class – Lesson #4
“Times of Death” – (Part Two) – The Funeral (Regular/Graveside) and the Committal
Introduction: As we continue on with our practical ministry study of death, bereavement, and the funeral, we need to look at the actual funeral sermon and the committal.
I.
There are two types of funerals that we want to consider during this class time today. The regular funeral service and the graveside service.
A.
The first is the regular funeral service. In the regular funeral service, you will probably be speaking either in a funeral chapel, or in a church building.
1.
The funeral sermon outline will be constructed in much the same way as is the regular sermon outline. The theme or topic of discussion will be the main difference. You should only plan to speak for 15-20 minutes at the most for a funeral. By the time they have some songs, maybe a special reading by a family member or friend, or a few words said by a close relative, the services will easily last over ½ an hour. There have been occasions in which the funeral speaker has preached for well over an hour. I have seen the family get up and walk out in disgust. No one will complain if you speak briefly at a funeral. Each area of the country has different customs for the funeral sermon. Some areas have you read the obituary as part of the service; other areas skip the obituary and have you read a eulogy written by the family. Still other areas of the country may have you skip both of those and go straight to the funeral sermon. Local customs will dictate how you handle that. The funeral director can be of great information in finding out what is expected at a funeral service. Often some of the family will have some part in the funeral service.
You will find emotions running from calm acceptance to outright rage. I have seen one person look like they were trying to crawl into the casket due to grief. I have witnessed people putting various articles of clothing or something of common remembrance into the casket with the deceased. Try not to be shocked by anything. One fellow I buried had a special T-shirt he was wearing that said, “If they won’t allow motorcycles in heaven, then I’ll be riding my Harley in hell”. The funeral for that man was very difficult to preach as everyone knew that he was not a
Christian. No funeral is fun to preach, but you will find it easier to preach the funeral of a longtime faithful Christian, than to preach the funeral for the town atheist or the town trouble-maker, which die without any hope. The funeral of a child or a very close friend or relative is also very difficult for most preachers. You can not preach anyone into heaven, nor can you preach anyone to hell. Their life and relationship to Christ determines that. The best that you can do is try to find some way to comfort the family left behind. Even in the funeral of a pagan, you can honestly say,
“____________ is now in the hands of a just and merciful God.” You haven’t condemned, you haven’t preached them to heaven, but you have told the truth. When you get to the funeral chapel, you will be expected to visit briefly with the family. You will then be told by the funeral director to wait patiently (usually in the main office area) until it is about time for the services to begin. About a minute before the starting time, you will be escorted to a seat behind a speaking stand. When it is the correct time for you to begin, the funeral director will give you a nod of the head, or a motion with his hand, or some other such indication that it is time to begin. Before the service begins, the funeral director will ask you for your order of services. I usually tell them I will be closing with a prayer for comfort for the family at the end of my sermon. After you have closed, you sit down and wait for the funeral director to come in and for him to direct the people to go out of the building in orderly fashion, usually past the coffin. You will be expected to stand at the head of the coffin in most funerals, as the people leave. When the family gets to the coffin, for their last good-byes, you should be prepared to give them some sort of encouragement.
Especially can you help if the family is well known to you and the deceased died in hope.
Funerals can be very tough on your emotions, especially if there is a lot of crying and if you personally knew the deceased. I know for a fact that it is no fun burying your friends. In one place we lived, I was there long enough that I could honestly say that I had more friends in the

II.
cemetery than I had walking around in town. Even “Jesus wept”, when confronted with the reality of Lazarus’ death, the sisters’ sorrow, and Lazarus’ tomb. This may take you on an emotional roller-coaster, so be prepared for that possibility.
B.
The grave-side service is a little different twist on the funeral. It takes place at the cemetery, usually under a tent of sorts, sometimes not. Usually you may read a few verses of Scripture, maybe a short poem, say a few words, have a prayer, and then go into the committal part of the service. A graveside service should only last between 5-10 minutes at most. Sometimes the funeral director will try to rush you on these as he isn’t making anything on it. A graveside service is usually used for the very poor, or for the death of a young child.
The Committal Service – After the funeral sermon, whether regular or grave-side, you will have a committal service in the cemetery. This is the usual custom most places, but not always, so check with the funeral director. At the committal service, I usually read Ecclesiastes chapter 12 (or parts thereof), read a poem that is applicable, say something like, “When God reached down and took a lump of clay, he formed and fashioned it into Adam the first man. He breathed into his nostrils the breath of life and Adam became a living being. So now our departed has lived life and has returned unto the dust from which God made Adam, the first man. Ashes to ashes and dust to dust”. Then I have prayer for the family, shake their hands, and leave. ( you may be expected to attend the funeral dinner if there is one)
FYI
1. By the way, the average funeral expenses in the mid1990’s were about $6,000-
8,000. That included grave diggers, funeral home services, casket, cemetery plot, and tent. etc...That is one reason why so many are turning to cremation. Average cost of that is a whole lot less. (Check the internet or the yellow pages for
“Cremation” or “Cremation and Funeral Alternatives)(With cremation you can still have a memorial service for the one departed)
2. One other thing of which you should be aware, you might get paid for preaching the funeral, you might not. I have been paid just over $300 for one funeral I did, and I have had several where I didn’t even have anyone say so much as “thank-you”, let alone get paid for it. Often, if the funeral was a “welfare” funeral, the funeral home is allowed a few hundred dollars by the state (Indiana) for burial expenses. These people were buried in what amounted to little more than a gold sprayed, fabric covered, heavy duty card board box (I’m serious). You must remember that you are doing a service for the family of the departed, and that God will reward you in due time. Helping with the services for a death often opens doors to get in and to some teaching/evangelism.

Supplemental Material:
1.
It may be of some use to you if you have some Scriptures with which to work in developing a funeral sermon. Here are several passages that can be developed that will make a good sermon for the funeral. a.
John 14:1-6 b.
Psalms 23 c.
Psalms 116:15 d.
Isaiah 57:1&2 e.
Psalms 46 f.
John 11, especially vs. 25 g.
Revelation 14:13 h.
Revelation 21, esp. vs. 1-7 i.
Revelation 22 j.
Genesis 23 – I Must Bury My Dead
2.
Look in your concordance under “resurrection”, ‘dead’, ‘death’, ‘eternal life’, etc.
3.
Also, it would be good for you to start a file I which to keep poetry, prose, or clippings about funerals or some funeral sermon materials you find as you read.
4.
I remember that in order to personalize one funeral, I talked about our departed Christian sister’s body like it was a house. I paralleled the fact that her house out in the country now was empty, she no longer lived there, with the idea that this body in the casket was the house her spirit lived in and it is now empty, too. The eternal soul had departed for a better home. (Part of my Scripture text was from 2 Cor. 5:1-4) I also commented that on her car she had a license plate on the front
(only the rear tag was required in Indiana to be legal) that read, “I Love Gospel Singing”. From that I did a spin-off on the idea that now she is singing “A New Song” and “the Song of Moses and the Lamb”. (Revelation 14:3 & Revelation 15:3. I don’t think there was a dry eye in the house. I had caught the essence of the life of our departed Christian sister and had been able to verbalize it in such a way that it touched the hearts of all those present for the funeral that day. I felt that was one of my two most powerful funeral sermons that I have ever preached. Everything fell into place as I spoke. (After that funeral sermon, I had several others who requested that I preach their funeral for them)
5.
Remember that only in Christ do we have the hope of the resurrection. At death, it is not
“Goodbye forever”, but rather it is, “I’ll see you in a little while”. Because Christ’s tomb is empty, we too have hope of a better life hereafter.
HINT FOR THE DAY: When you are preaching, remember that you are speaking as a representative of our great God! Show some enthusiasm! This will not only help you to ‘get into’ your sermon better, but it will help make the sermon more interesting and easier for your hearers to listen. Along with that, don’t be afraid to move your hands and arms to gesture to your audience. The visual effect will be helpful in communicating your sermon material. If you are too rigid, it can make the congregation feel ill at ease with the presentation. And finally, be sure to take enough time to “nail down” the invitation. Tell the congregation exactly what you want them to do. They should be offered the options to respond to the Gospel
(H.B.R.C.Bapt.CL.), to come forward to be restored into the fellowship of the local church, and to come to ask for the prayers of the church in their behalf. If you don’t offer a good, rock-solid, invitation telling them exactly what to do, then you may have wasted your time and theirs on the rest of the sermon. You won’t make a conversion, if you don’t tell them what to do and then ask them to do it!