‘Purposeful Conversations’ FAQs
What does ‘purposeful conversation’ actually mean?
‘Purposeful conversation’ is our (UHS) term to describe the conversation or
discussion (outside line management) between two parties where one party seeks
another’s (trained) perspective on their issue(s). This could be a single event or short
term, which are both coaching, and longer term, which is mentoring. We hope that
this neutral term will make it easier for individuals to find the support they seek - we
know that, in the past, having to decide between mentoring & coaching has
prevented some from then accessing either.
Is ‘purposeful conversations’ just another term for ranting?
‘Sounding off’ to a trusted friend or colleague about the something at work that’s
bugging us and knowing we will get a sympathetic ear can be extremely therapeutic
– or not, particularly when it becomes a habit. Whereas having a purposeful
conversation, or a series of them, can help us to reflect on our thoughts and feelings
and crystallise them into meaningful action. Purposeful conversations do what their
title suggest; stated aims and objectives form a vital part of the dialogue, there is
focus on developing skills and knowledge, and each one should end with an agreed
action plan.
Why would I want to have one of these conversations?
The input of others, perhaps because they have experienced the situation we are
facing and/or have the necessary skills to help us work though our concerns, can
often be invaluable. We all encounter situations at work, from time to time, such as:
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a change in job or area of responsibility
new in post
a difficult working relationship
a potential promotion with career implications
finding an area of work, or just the volume of it, challenging
reviewing a recent learning experience
where the opportunity to talk it through with a colleague is a helpful part of resolving
the issue. Others reasons might be, perhaps:
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“I’m not seeing the wood for the trees - I know so much about it, my
expertise has narrowed my field of vision”
“I’d like to develop the ability to step back and look afresh”
“I’m stuck, don’t know what to do”
“I’d just value an objective view, another’s perspective”
“Someone’s suggested it”
“I feel helpless, I’m struggling”
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Isn’t this what my line manager is for?
A purposeful conversation with a third party is, ideally, in addition to an effective
working relationship with your line manager. Looking at your issue with objectivity, via
a different ‘lens’ - someone not directly involved - can bring you fresh insight.
Besides, your working relationship with your manager may be the issue you wish to
explore!
Who does them?
UHS has an increasing number of coaches and more than 60 mentors, all trained,
both sexes, from different disciplines and of varying seniority – all sharing the
common factor of wanting to help others in a purposeful way.
Is it confidential?
Apart from the usual caveats on issues of, for example, misconduct or criminality (!)
your discussion is remains confidential as far as the coach or mentor is concerned.
You, of course, may share what you choose, since it is about you. Your
mentor/coach is able to confirm whether they have seen you, though not the detail of
the discussion.
What does the coach or mentor get out of it?
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Helping others in a purposeful way
Developing their listening and questioning skills
Learning from the mentee/coachee
What are the similarities between coaching & mentoring?
Features common to both mentoring & coaching:
 developing the mentee’s/coachee’s personal effectiveness
 mutual trust and respect
 confidential setting
 1 to 1 with coach/mentor
 60 – 90’ meetings
 agreed ‘contract’ between both participants
 clear action(s) from each session
 balance of challenge and support
 focus on helping the coachee/mentee to develop their own solutions
wherever possible
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Mentor: generally
Coach: detailed
senior, often (but not
always) same
discipline who’s
undertaken many of
the same roles and
responsibilities as
the mentee.
knowledge of the
individual’s work
area/organisation
unnecessary
Advice
‘informal’
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professional pathways
usually longer term
bigger component of
advice & direction
focus on capabilities
development driven
‘formal’
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goal – oriented
usually short term
often centred on a single issue
greater focus on tasks
performance driven
Key message:
if you think a purposeful conversation will help you, choose
coaching or mentoring and give it a try, rather than nothing at
all!
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How do I get a coach or mentor?
You’ll find more detailed information on the other pages within Staffnet (see
accompanying links). Alternatively please contact David Young
davidpaul.young@uhs.nhs.uk x4032, who is the lead for both coaching & mentoring.
What’s ‘Coaching for Excellence’?
This is the name of UHS’ coaching scheme – the purpose of coaching is to help an
individual be even better than they are already, hence the excellence.
I’m a manager – what does a ‘‘coaching style’ mean?
Managing with a coaching style – much more asking (open questions) than telling –
tends to develop and empower your team, enabling them to assume greater
responsibility and ownership and require less command and control from you. It
encourages movement from a parent/child* relationship to more adult/adult, generally
more effective in the workplace.
How can I be a coach/mentor?
We’re always on the lookout for new mentors or coaches at all levels of the
organisation who have the following skills/qualities:
 wanting to help others in a purposeful way.
 active listening
 use of effective questioning to raise awareness
 building rapport
 providing performance-focused, non-judgemental feedback
 summarising
 effective use of silence
 demonstrating empathy
 ability to challenge assumptions and preconceptions
Please note that these skills are the foundations of personal effectiveness, so
applicable in legion situations – they are a way of being.
* Transactional Analysis (Eric Berne)
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