PWR Worship Resource Packet Beloved Community
Theme-Based Ministry Project
Pacific Western Region-UUA & First Universalist Church of Denver
SLT = Singing the Living Tradition/ STJ = Singing the Journey / WW = UUA Worship Web/ T = Touchstones
Please attribute the authors of these resources in the Order of Service and in the service itself.
Part 1: Sample Order of Service
Part 2: List of Resources
Part 3: Worship Resources
Part 1: Sample Order of Service
This sample order of service illustrates one way to break the sermon (aka talk, lecture, etc.) into two or
three parts. One part would use one of the sermon excerpts provided below, while the other one or two
parts would be based on the theme and written and delivered by members of your congregation. An
alternative using two parts would be to use two of the sermon excerpts in this packet.
Announcements
Gathering Music
Opening Words
Hymn
Chalice Lighting (either spoken by worship leader or in unison by congregation)
Sung Response #123 Spirit of Life by Carolyn McDade (remain seated)
Spirit of Life, come unto me. Sing in my heart all the stirrings of compassion.
Blow in the wind, rise in the sea; move in the hand giving life the shape of justice.
Roots hold me close; wings set me free; Spirit of Life, come to me, come to me.
Words of Welcome (by worship leader or Board member)
Meeting and Greeting (invite people to greet each other)
Music
Exploration I
Suggested length 5 minutes (500 words) written by a member of the
congregation on the theme or use pat of one of the sermons in section 11.
(If you are just doing two explorations, eliminate this one.)
Sharing of Joys and Sorrows (with lighting of candles or another ritual)
(unison response) For the joys shared, we join you in celebration. For the sorrows and concerns
spoken here, may you feel our sympathy and compassion. For all that remains unspoken, both joy and
sorrow, may the caring of our community offer you both kindness and hope.
Readings from the Common Bowl (use ten quotes from the Touchstones journal read by two people
alternating—don’t read the names of the authors of the quotes, but allow a few beats between them so
people can absorb the words and the meaning.)
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Exploration II
Use one of the sermon excerpts provided below (ten minutes/1,000 words)
Offering
Reading or Responsive Reading
Exploration III
Suggested length 5 minutes (500 words) written by a member of the
congregation on the theme.
Hymn
Extinguishing the Chalice by Elizabeth Selle Jones (in unison)
We extinguish this flame but not the light of truth, the warmth of community, or the fire of commitment.
These we carry in our hearts until we are together again.
Closing Words
Postlude
Part 2: List of Resources
1.0: Opening Words
1.1: SLT #580 The Task of the Religious Community by Rev. Mark Morrison-Reed
1.2: Come down off the ladder by Rev. David S. Blanchard (see below) WW
1.3: Called to Gather by Rev. Kirk D. Loadman-Copeland (see below) WW
1.4: Come into this circle of community by Andrew Pakula (see below) WW
1.5: What life have we, if we have not life together? by Rev. Charles A. Howe (see below) WW
1.6: We gather in community to rest from our labors by Rev. Paul H. L'Herrou (see below)
WW
1.7: For our community gathered here by Rev. Jane E. Mauldin (see below) WW
1.8: Sabbath Invitation by Rev. John Millspaugh (see below) WW
1.9: We come to love a church by Rev. Andrew C. Kennedy (see below) WW
1.10: In this quiet hour may our spirits be renewed by Rev. Gary Kowalski (see below) WW
2.0: Chalice Lighting
2.1: Abundance Chalice Lighting by Rev. Dawn Skjei Cooley (see below) WW
2.2: The Struggle for Freedom by Rev. Paul Sprecher (see below) WW
2.3: UU Heritage by Rev. Elizabeth M. Strong (see below) WW
2.4: Blessed is the fire that burns deep in the soul by Rev. Eric A. Heller-Wagner (see below)
WW
2.5: O light of life by Rev. Samuel A. Trumbore (see below) WW
2.6: A Communion of Heart and Soul by Rev. Bruce Southworth (see below) WW
3.0: Hymns
3.1: SLT #1 May Nothing Evil Cross This Door (aka Prayer for This House)
3.2: SLT #12 O Life That Maketh All Things New
3.3: SLT #113 Where Is Our Holy Church?
3.4: SLT #145 As Tranquil Streams
3.5: SLT #323 Break Not the Circle
3.6: SLT #354 We Laugh, We Cry
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3.7: SLT #360 Here We Have Gathered
3.8: SLT #389 Gathered Here
4.0: Stories & Illustrations
4.1: The Rabbi’s Gift (see below)
4.2: Is It Still Night? (see below)
5.0: Meditations
5.1: Come, yet again, come by Anne Slater (see below) WW
5.2: Here in this space we are gathered by Rev. M. Maureen Killoran (see below) WW
5.3: The Home That Love Made by Rev. Amanda Poppei (see below) WW
5.4: Popularity by Rev. David O. Rankin (see below) WW
5.5: A spirit of meditation by Rev. Linda M. Hansen (see below) WW
6.0: Prayers
6.1: How Shall We Pray? by Judith L. Quarles (see below) WW
6.2: Beloved Community by Rev. Fred L Hammond (see below) WW
6.3: The church is a body by Rev. Victoria Weinstein (see below) WW
6.4: O Deep Mystery of our lives by Rev. Sheldon W. Bennett (see below) WW
6.5: Prayer for those Gathered in Worship by Rev. Barbara J. Pescan (see below) WW
6.6: We thank them all by Mel Harkrader-Pine (see below) WW
6.7: Pastoral Prayer by Rev. Wayne B. Arnason (see below) WW
6.8: Universal Spirit of love, O God within each one of us by Rev. Dorothy May Emerson (see
below) WW
7.0: Responsive Readings
7:1: SLT #443 We Arrive Out of Many Singular Rooms by Rev. Kenneth Patton
7:2: SLT #444 This House by Rev. Kenneth Patton
7:3: SLT #576 A Litany of Restoration by Rev. Marjorie Bowens-Wheatley
7:4: SLT #591 I Call That Church Free by James Luther Adams
8.0: Readings
8.1: Hallmarks of a healthy vital church by Rev. Tom Owen Towle (see below)
9.0: Extinguishing the Chalice
9.1: We extinguish this flame by Elizabeth Selle Jones (see below)
10.0: Closing Words
10.1: In this community by Rev. Sydney K. Wilde (see below) WW
10.2: Our time in this place by Rev. Kathy A. Huff (see below) WW
10.3: As far as our love flows by Rev. Annie Foerster (see below) WW
10.4: As we part now one from another by Rev. Eileen B. Karpeles (see below) WW
11.0: Sermons & Sermon Excerpts
11.1: Growing the Beloved Community! by Rev. Tom Owen-Towle (Excerpt, full text at
http://jesspages.net/bestofuu/10/to-grow-toward-whom-we-might-become#more-67) (see
below)
11.2: We Drink From Wells We Did Not Dig by Rev. Kirk Loadman-Copeland (see below)
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11.3: Our Beloved Community by Rev. Charles J. Stephens (Excerpt, full text at
http://www.uucwc.org/2009/12/06/our-beloved-community/) (see below)
11.4: I’m Sorry by Rev. Marni Harmony (Excerpt, full text at
http://www.uutarpon.org/uutarpon_sermon__march06.htm) (see below)
Part 3: Worship Resources
1.0: Opening Words
1.1: SLT #580 The Task of the Religious Community by Rev. Mark Morrison-Reed
1.2: Come down off the ladder by Rev. David S. Blanchard
Come down off the ladder. Wash out that paintbrush. Shake the sand out of your shoes. Get
up off your muddy knees, and give the garden a morning off. Fold up the newspaper. Turn off
the coffeepot. Close up your calendar, already filled with dates, and times, and people, and
places that claim you. This church is ready for you to fill its rooms, to create its spirit, to
generate its warmth, to kindle its light. This church is ready for you to make community, to
create beauty, to bend it toward justice, to serve its ideals.
This church is ready for you to be here, honoring our past, invigorating our present, and
dreaming our future. This is your church. Here we are home. Here we are whole.
Let us begin.
1:3: Called to Gather by Rev. Kirk D. Loadman-Copeland
We are called to gather in worship as a beloved community.
We are called to gather in worship as a beloved community. We are called to set aside
distractions and anxieties, that we might touch deeper springs and be renewed. We are called to
seek and to share comfort for the hurts that afflict. We are called to desire more love, more
justice, and life more abundant. We are called to truth, to mercy, to humility, and to courage.
Let us answer the call with the yes of our lives.
1.4: Come into this circle of community by Andrew Pakula
Come into this circle of community. Come into this sacred space.
Be not tentative. Bring your whole self!
Bring the joy that makes your heart sing.
Bring your kindness and your compassion.
Bring also your sorrow, your pain.
Bring your brokenness and your disappointments.
Spirit of love and mystery; help us to recognize the spark of the divine that resides within each
of us.
May we know the joy of wholeness.
May we know the joy of being together.
1.5: What life have we, if we have not life together? by Rev. Charles A. Howe
What life have we, if we have not life together? There is no life not lived in community, and no
community not lived in celebration and praise!
1.6: We gather in community to rest from our labors by Rev. Paul H. L'Herrou
We gather in community to rest from our labors, to greet our neighbors, and to open our
being to insight and intuition of that greater reality of which we are a part.
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May we find in our time together inspiration and renewal. May we touch the holy in each
other and be touched by the graciousness of life. May we find here a calm peacefulness that
will carry us through the days ahead.
1.7: For our community gathered here by Rev. Jane E. Mauldin
For our community gathered here, for the spirit that called us together and drew us to this place:
We give thanks this day.
For moments we have shared with others; for times when we have reached out across barriers
of distance and fear; for times when others have reached out to us; for moments when we have
discovered another along our path:
We give thanks this day.
For this community of celebration and growth, introspection and solitude, and for those
moments of "that peace which passes all understanding":
We give thanks this day.
For our gathering together out of distant places; for our weaving together out of many separate
selves this hour of celebration and worship:
We give thanks this day.
1.8: Sabbath Invitation by Rev. John Millspaugh
Leave aside the little thoughts
that distract you from the depths of your soul,
For this is a holy place, and
now is a holy time.
Join with the others in this room,
this community of seekers,
and together, let us find our Sabbath.
1.9: We come to love a church by Rev. Andrew C. Kennedy
We come to love a church,
the traditions, the history,
and especially the people associated with it.
And through these people,
young and old,
known and unknown,
we reach out -Both backward into history
and forward into the future -To link together the generations
in this imperfect, but blessed community
of memory and hope.
1.10: In this quiet hour may our spirits be renewed by Rev. Gary Kowalski
In this quiet hour may our spirits be renewed.
In this gathering of friends may we be ready to extend ourselves to those in need, and with trust
to receive the hand that is offered.
In this community of ideals may we remember the principles that guide us and reflect upon
those things that give meaning to our lives, renewing our dedication to serve the highest that we
know.
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In this time of worship, may our minds be open to new truth, and our hearts be receptive to
love, as we give thanks for this life we are blessed to share.
2.0: Chalice Lighting
2.1: Abundance Chalice Lighting by Rev. Dawn Skjei Cooley
We light our chalice this morning, grateful for the love that we experience in this beloved
community. May the flame light the way for all who seek such abundance.
2.2: The Struggle for Freedom by Rev. Paul Sprecher
We light this chalice in memory of the courage of those who have struggled for freedom
The persistence of those who’ve struggled for justice,
And the love of those who’ve built beloved communities to carry on the light of hope.
2.3: UU Heritage by Rev. Elizabeth M. Strong
Our Unitarian heritage bids us light our chalice
In the name of freedom,
In the light of reason,
In actions of tolerance.
We gather in community to celebrate a heritage of freedom, reason, and tolerance.
Our Universalist heritage bids us light our chalice
In the name of faith,
In the light of hope,
In actions of love.
We gather in community to celebrate a heritage of faith, hope, and love.
Let us bring this Unitarian Universalist heritage into our world and our lives today.
2.4: Blessed is the fire that burns deep in the soul by Rev. Eric A. Heller-Wagner
Blessed is the fire that burns deep in the soul. It is the flame of the human spirit touched into
being by the mystery of life. It is the fire of reason; the fire of compassion; the fire of
community; the fire of justice; the fire of faith. It is the fire of love burning deep in the human
heart; the divine glow in every life.
2.5: O light of life by Rev. Samuel A. Trumbore
O light of life,
Be kindled again in our hearts
As we meet together this morning
To celebrate the joy of human community
Seeking a wholeness that extends beyond ourselves.
2.6: A Communion of Heart and Soul by Rev. Bruce Southworth
For the gift of this day and for our community of spiritual nurture and compassion, we give
thanks.
We light this chalice as a symbol of our faith.
May our many sparks meet and merge in communion of heart and soul.
3.0: Hymns
3.1: SLT #1 May Nothing Evil Cross This Door (aka Prayer for This House)
3.2: SLT #12 O Life That Maketh All Things New
3.3: SLT #113 Where Is Our Holy Church?
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3.4: SLT #145 As Tranquil Streams
3.5: SLT #323 Break Not the Circle
3.6: SLT #354 We Laugh, We Cry
3.7: SLT #360 Here We Have Gathered
3.8: SLT #389 Gathered Here
4.0: Stories & Illustrations
4.1: The Rabbi’s Gift Adapted. The earliest version of this story may have been written by Francis
Dorff, O. Praem, of the Norbertine Community of Albuquerque, New Mexico, March 1979
A famous monastery had fallen on hard times. Only a few monks remained, and its
buildings were deserted and in disrepair. In the woods beside the monastery, the rabbi from the
nearby town had built a small hut where he would go from time to time to be alone and pray.
The monks did not speak to him, but they knew when he was near.
One day the abbot decided to visit the rabbi and seek his wisdom about the troubles that the
monastery faced. As he approached the hut, the abbot came out to greet him and they embraced
each other like long-lost brothers. They went inside the hut and sat in the two wooden chairs in
the middle of the room. They sat in silence for a long time, interspersed with a prayer that one
or the other would utter aloud.
Then the abbot began to share his concerns about the monastery. The rabbi listened intently,
nodding his head from time to time. When the abbot had finished, the rabbi said, “I know how
it is. Fewer and fewer people come to the synagogue each year. I have no wisdom to share with
you, but I know that you and the monks are holy men and do good works. Because of this, I
also know that the Messiah is among you.” With that, the rabbi bid the abbot goodbye.
The abbot left without a word and walked back to the monastery in a kind of daze as he
pondered what the rabbi had said. When he arrived there, the monks surrounded him asking to
know what wisdom the rabbi shared. The abbot said with sorrow in his voice, “The rabbi had
no wisdom to help us. As I was leaving he said something strange that I do not understand.” He
said, “The Messiah is among you.” With that the abbot went to his room. The monks were also
confused by the rabbi’s words and they, too, went to their rooms for the night.
Over the days and weeks to come, they all pondered the words of the rabbi. “Who could
possibly be the Messiah in their midst? Could it be the abbot? Surely yes, for he was wise
beyond words. But perhaps it was Brother John. Often disagreeable, but always there when you
needed help. He seemed to appear without ever being asked. Or could it be Thomas who had
such a way tending the garden and caring for the animals. He seemed so life-giving.” And then
the most disturbing thought possible occurred, “Surely the rabbi couldn’t have meant me. How
could I be the Messiah? But what if it is me? What should I do?”
None of them could solve the rabbi’s riddle, but each in his own way silently vowed to treat
the others with reverence and respect since anyone of them could be the Messiah. A gentle,
warm-hearted, loving, concern began to grow among them, which was difficult to describe, but
easy to notice.
As visitors came to the monastery, they found themselves deeply moved by the example of
the monks. It simply felt good to be in their presence, and others came to picnic on the grounds,
walk in the gardens, or sit quietly in the chapel. It was clear that the rabbi’s gift, his assertion
that the Messiah was among them, had transformed their hearts and radically changed their
behavior. Slowly the monastery once became a place of light and learning and loving, and, as a
beloved community, it grew and prospered.
4.2: Is It Still Night?
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An old rabbi once asked his students how they could tell when the night had ended and the
day had begun.
“Could it be” asked one of the students, “when you can see a animal in the distance and tell
whether it is a sheep or a dog?”
“No” answered the rabbi.
Another asked, “is it when you can look at a tree in the distance and tell whether it is a fig or
a peach tree?”
“No” answered the rabbi.
“Then when is it?” they demanded.
“It is when you can look in the face of any man or woman and see that it is your sister or
brother. Because if you cannot see this, then it is still night.”
5.0: Meditations
5.1: Come, yet again, come by Anne Slater
The Persian poet Rumi challenges us:
“Come, come, whoever you are: wanderer, worshiper, lover of leaving: Ours is no caravan
of despair, come, yet again come.”
And we come, from rich heritages of liturgy and pomp;
We come, from burning legacies of angry gods and threats of hell-fire.
We come, just as we are
We come, with exuberant and joyful hearts, eager to witness to others
We come, bereft of the goodness of life, wondering, hesitant;
We come, just as we are.
We come, in the bloom of youth, ready to explore new truths;
We come, ready to sit apart from our children and be nourished for an hour;
We come, with grey in our hair and experiences to share.
We come, just as we are.
We come to the place we never knew before was home.
We come to the place that has been home for most of our lives.
We come, just as we are, to join our brothers and sisters as members of one family in this
beloved home; our hands and hearts outstretched.
“Come, yet again, come.”
(To use as introduction to a period of silent meditation, you may add)
Come, silence, fill us.
5.2: Here in this space we are gathered by Rev. M. Maureen Killoran
Here in this space, we are gathered, called by our sense of urgency, or duty, or the longing
for community, called to be together on this day . . . Here, in this space, we are gathered . . .
called to hold ourselves accountable to our values . . . to remind ourselves of those hopes and
dreams and possibilities for which sometimes in the rough-and-tumble world it can be hard to
hold on to belief.
Here, in this space, we are gathered, called to do our part in weaving a web of human
community.
Here, in this space, some of us have come in pain. To those who are dealing with issues of
health, we pray, we wish, for courage and healing. May we pause, and hold gently all the
concerns, named and unnamed, that are gathered in this room, this day.
And in the complexities of community, it is right that in this space some have come with joy
bubbling in their heart . . . May we rejoice together, remembering the wisdom that says joys are
multiplied when shared . . . May we remember gratitude for warmth . . . thankfulness for
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sunshine . . . appreciation for the simple tastes of whatever food our lives and bodies let us
choose.
Here, in this space, we are called to weave the web of human community. May we pause,
and in our silence, may we lift up at least one blessing, one joy, no matter how small, that has
touched our life this week.
May our shared silence be a blessing on our hearts, on this community, and may this
blessing extend outward to grace the wider world.
5.3: The Home That Love Made by Rev. Amanda Poppei
This is the home that love made.
It is full of the love that the founders felt, when they planned out these walls and raised these
beams above us.
This is the home that love made.
It is full of the love of all who have worshipped here; those who have celebrated and grieved
here; the babies dedicated, couples married, and family members mourned here.
This is the home that love made.
It is full of the love of our children, as they learn and laugh together, and our youth, as they
grow into their own sense of purpose and meaning.
This is the home that love made.
It is full of the love of the staff who have served it, full of their hopes for this congregation,
their hard work and their acts of dedication.
This is the home that love made.
It is full of the love of the choir, the love made so clear in the voices lifted here on Sunday
morning.
This is the home that love made.
It is full of our love, the love of this community, despite our differences and our
disagreements, the love that holds us together as a people.
This is the home that love made. Can you feel it?
May the love be with us always.
5.4: Popularity by Rev. David O. Rankin
To escape the trap of public acclaim, an authentic church should advertise as follows:
Our worship is not an entertainment.
Our congregation is not an audience.
Our music is not a concert performance.
Our preaching is not a trivial comfort.
Our theology is not a marketing strategy.
Our counseling is not a promise of prosperity.
Our church is not a business enterprise.
Our ministry is not a cult of personality.
Our community is not a gathering of sheep.
Our success is not a membership statistic.
In fact, it is probably better to be disliked, offensive, and scandalous. Even booing is
preferable to mass applause. For no vision is worthwhile without the risk of rebuke. Every truth
is born out of painful criticism. Love, itself, is crucifying.
5.5: A spirit of meditation by Rev. Linda M. Hansen
Let us enter into a spirit of meditation.
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Much of our human struggle is with what we do not know or understand. It is often difficult
not to want answers -- or even more difficult, not to think we have them already. May we
experience what we do not know not as an individual failure but as an invitation to community.
May we seek not the true answers so much as the true questions, knowing that true questions
make of our lives meaningful even if sometimes restless journeys. May we be grateful for the
restless voices in our communities.
Let us take a few moments of silence to listen for the restless voices within ourselves.
(Silence)
May we be good company to one another in our questions and our journey. So may it be.
6.0: Prayers
6.1: How Shall We Pray? by Judith L. Quarles
Let us join our hearts and minds in the quiet of meditation and prayer.
How shall we pray?
First, let us be open to the silence. Let us hear the sounds in this room, the noises outside,
and the comfortable murmur from the children downstairs. Let us begin to hear the soft beating
of our hearts. And let us listen intently for messages from within.
Next, let us feel gratitude for our lives and for our beautiful earth. As hard as life gets, as sad
or lonely as we sometimes feel, let us always be warmed by the gifts of this life.
Next, let us hold in our hearts all those, known or unknown who are in need. May we find in
ourselves the energy and knowledge to bring care to the world.
And finally, let us be aware of the blessing that it is not ours alone to do the work of the
world. Love and community work wonders that we by ourselves could never manage.
In this time of silence let us form our own prayers out of the concerns of our hearts. Amen
6.2: Beloved Community by Rev. Fred L Hammond
Spirit of Life that binds all of creation together, May our thoughts focus on this connection
that weaves between us here in this gathering and with those at our home congregations, and
even with those lives we may not even be aware of in distant lands. Yet, we are all of one
fabric.
Let us learn the lesson of the new patch on old fabric. Like a new patch, if we are without
wisdom, without compassion, without empathy for the threads that connect us, then we tear at
the very fabric that makes us whole. May we today find ways to recommit ourselves anew to
peacemaking within our lives, within our congregations, within our country, within our global
community. May we recognize the power that we as single threads have in binding our hearts
and minds together towards this fabric of common cause.
Spirit of Life lead the arc of Justice ever forward in all of our actions. May our community
grow ever firm in its convictions for a world of equitable justice, equitable economies,
equitable relations. May the beloved community be more than just an ideal to strive for but one
that manifests in our midst by our daily actions in thought and deed.
Spirit of Life that binds all creation together may we honor you in caring for that creation.
May we be caring for the creation sitting next to us in these pews, and caring for the creation
beyond these walls whose very existence adds life and enjoyment to this planet. May this be so.
Let the people offer a resounding, Yes Indeed.
6.3: The church is a body by Rev. Victoria Weinstein
The church is a body.
May this body breathe and be together in the spirit of hope
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May it feel held by comfort.
Those who seek consolation, may they find it in the solace of this moment.
The church is a body.
It is as strong as all the men and women who have ever gathered within its walls.
It is the power of all they dreamed and all that they have done.
The church is a body.
It is as vulnerable as the most newborn and untried of its members.
It is ancient, and it is ever new.
The church is a story.
It is the story of lives that are interwoven,
brought together in this place and this time
for the simple purpose of caring for one another,
and helping one another along the arduous path from birth to death.
The church is a vision.
It is a vision of unity amid diversity,
It is a vision of reverence for all of creation,
It is a vision that beckons us beyond the concerns of our own skins.
In the silence, may we abide as one body in the spirit of faith, hope and love that is the story
and the vision of this church.
6.4: O Deep Mystery of our lives by Rev. Sheldon W. Bennett
O Deep Mystery of our lives -- voice in our hearts and light in our minds -- in the joyful
freedom of our fellowship, we are here together as adventurers called forth in spirit, men and
women moving, yearning, questing, pushing the limits of our lives outwards to what is more
loving and just, more beautiful and true.
Here in this meeting house, this place made holy by the memories, the aspirations, the
purposes and ideals of those before us, we would be inspired by their example. These were
women and men of vision. These were people of spirit.
We, here today, are also people of spirit. We, too, are struck in awe before the great mystery
of the cosmos. We, too, are powerfully moved by a deep concern for our world and our care for
one another. The spirit moves also in us -- as a free religious community joined in a common
covenant of aspiration, commitment and hope.
May ours be a faith that is more than just beautiful words and high ideals. May ours be a
faith of vitality and commitment, a faith that burns in our hearts and blazes in our minds. May
ours be a faith that shines to the world as the light of deeds and the witness of actions.
O Source and Spirit of our lives, may we respond boldly to your call to adventure -- for
justice, for love, and for joy. Amen.
6.5: Prayer for those Gathered in Worship by Rev. Barbara J. Pescan
In this familiar place, listen:
to the sounds of breathing, creaking chairs,
shuffling feet, clearing throats, and sighing all around
Know that each breath, movement, the glance
meant for you or intercepted
holds a life within it.
These are signs
that we choose to be in this company
have things to say to each other
things not yet said but in each other’s presence still
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trembling behind our hearts’ doors
these doors closed but unlocked
each silent thing waiting
on the threshold between unknowing and knowing,
between being hidden and being known.
Find the silence among these people
and listen to it all—breathing, sighs,
movement, holding back—
hear the tears that have not yet reached their eyes
perhaps they are your own
hear also the laughter building deep where joy abides
despite everything.
Listen: rejoice. And say Amen.
6.6: We thank them all by Mel Harkrader-Pine
Some came here looking for solace.
Some came here and gave it to them.
Some came here seeking music.
Some came here and gave it, joyfully.
Some came here seeking laughter.
Some came here and created it.
Some came here seeking learning, growth.
Some came here and provided it.
Some came here looking for a sense of security, a safe haven.
Some came here and provided it.
Some came here seeking an escape from hectic lives.
Some came here and enabled them to have it.
Some came here seeking the joy of community.
Some came here and created that.
Some came here wanting to serve.
Some came here and made it possible for them.
We thank them all
6.7: Pastoral Prayer by Rev. Wayne B. Arnason
Spirit of Life,
We pause to give thanks for many gifts of life that are ours, gifts we find expressed and
enhanced in the community of this church.
We are grateful for our family and friends and all they mean to us.
We are grateful for opportunities to learn and grow, and for teachers of all kinds, those who
come into our classrooms, and those we find within the pages of a book.
We are grateful for the insights and beauty we find all around us in the natural world.
We are grateful for ministry, and for all the forms that it takes in our community of faith - in
teaching and preaching; in care for children and care for our seniors and care for our building;
in leadership tasks both large and small.
We pause now in silence witness to the gifts we share and the gratitude we feel:
Amen
6.8: Universal Spirit of love, O God within each one of us by Rev. Dorothy May Emerson
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Universal Spirit of love, O God within each one of us, whose power reaches to the stars,
whose love connects us one to another and to all creation -- we are one.
We cry out with the pain of this broken world. With all our capacity for love, we ask: why
can't we wrap this world in love and bring healing? We confess that we are not always able to
express the love we know is inside us. We feel constricted and hesitant, afraid that our love will
be rejected or misused.
We pray for forgiveness, that we may learn to forgive others and accept their forgiveness of
us. Help us let go of fear so we can move on, opening our hearts to one another. We pray for
empowerment that we may learn to love more fully. Let our love shine forth from this sacred
place that others may know that here they will find freedom, acceptance, community and love.
We give thanks for the blessings of love in our lives and for the chance we have to love
again and always. May we feel the love inside us connecting with the love in each other and the
stars. Amen. Blessed Be.
7.0: Responsive Readings
7:1: SLT #443 We Arrive Out of Many Singular Rooms by Rev. Kenneth Patton
7:2: SLT #444 This House by Rev. Kenneth Patton
7:3: SLT #576 A Litany of Restoration by Rev. Marjorie Bowens-Wheatley
7:4: SLT #591 I Call That Church Free by James Luther Adams
8.0: Readings
8.1: Hallmarks of a healthy vital church by Rev. Tom Owen Towle
1. A healthy congregation occupies holy ground; it's not a social club. It's primarily a site for
seeking and spreading the sacred, "the deep way" as Sophia Fahs said. .. You should heal that
part of the cosmos where you're planted.
2. A healthy congregation welcomes all souls, including all sorts - for example the Church of the
Open Door in Chicago. "Am I saved?" is the wrong question; it should be "Are WE saved?"
3. A healthy congregation is framed and run democratically, not autocratically. Shared ministry
involves rights when you become a member, rites, responsibilities and the risks. Democracy
has a theological facet as well
4. A healthy congregation CARES for its own membership. The mature congregation banks not
on fixing but on serving one another; you must distinguish between caregiving and caretaking we are not a hospital. We do this through covenant groups, support groups, kinship circles,
whatever works.
5. A healthy congregation embodies UNITY AMIDST DIVERSITY. All life choices are
welcome; the challenge is to become diverse without becoming divided; you "DO" church by
continually clarifying your mission.
6. A healthy congregation balances JUSTICE and JOY. It's about balance; a healthy congregation
is not comprised of grim crusaders, nor smug celebrants. Mother Teresa said, "Serving is my
joy, not my duty."
7. A healthy congregation practices the law of RESPECTFULNESS. The overarching goal of
church life is right relationship, not rugged individualism; Religious education is all about
respect: boundaries are kept, saboteurs are confronted, conflicts are engaged, not run from. A
healthy congregation fights for impact.
8. A healthy congregation gazes BACK, AHEAD, AND AROUND. You don't dwell in the past
but you chart it. You mark transitional moments, rites of passage of the institution as well as
individual. It should be trans-generational, with healthy vital activities for all ages.
9. A healthy congregation spreads our version of GOOD NEWS. Outreach is two-pronged. There
should be ongoing low-key evangelism directed at those in the larger society who harbor liberal
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religious leanings, and there should also be public witness on larger issues. The role of
religious leader is not to BE a saint but to "equip the saints."
10. A healthy congregation produces STEWARDS, NOT OWNERS. We are all interims, all
"temps," we must pass the torch on. Stewardship is a meaningful word, it encompasses the
entire sweep, from our own bodies to the environment. "Keepers of the hall" is what it
originally meant. Stewards "co-shepherd" a parish for a while, on loan.
11. A healthy congregation is wholly LIBERAL; marked by compassionate just behavior that
"liberates." It is also appropriately conservative because we preserve our heritage. It is also
radical because we go to the roots.
12. A healthy congregation keeps EVOLVING. The church knows it's always reforming and being
reformed, it is the change agent but also the recipient of change. Evolution is a personal and
institutional aspiration as well as a biological reality. It's a JOURNEY toward wholeness; we're
not a system but a movement.
13. A healthy congregation is held in an ETERNAL EMBRACE. It is a mystical ideal;
congregations never reach the promised land. You have to "keep your eyes on the prize." It gets
back to the question of "Whose I am?"
9.0: Extinguishing the Chalice
9.1: We extinguish this flame by Elizabeth Selle Jones
We extinguish this flame but not the light of truth, the warmth of community, or the fire of
commitment. These we carry in our hearts until we are together again.
10.0: Closing Words
10.1: In this community by Rev. Sydney K. Wilde
In this community we give and we receive.
May we go forth, now, to share the bounty of our love.
10.2: Our time in this place by Rev. Kathy A. Huff
Our time in this place may have ended, but our connection to each other and this community
remains.
Together may we walk the path of justice, speak words of love, live the selfless deed, trod
gently upon the earth, and fill the world with compassion.
Until we meet again, blessed be.
10.3: As far as our love flows by Rev. Annie Foerster
As far as our love flows; as far as our hope grows; as far as our yearning goes; -- we are no
farther one from another.
10.4: As we part now one from another by Rev. Eileen B. Karpeles
As we part now one from another, let these be our thoughts:
If that which is most holy lies within the human person, and if the greatest power in the
world shines flickering and uncertain from each individual heart, then it is easy to see the value
of human associations dedicated to nurturing that light: the couple, the family, the religious
community.
For the power of good in any one of us must at times waver. But when a group together is
dedicated to nurturing the power of good, it is rare for the light to grow dim in all individuals at
the same moment.
So we borrow courage and wisdom from one another, to warm us and keep us until we're
together again.
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11.0: Sermons & Sermon Excerpts
11.1: Growing the Beloved Community! by Rev. Tom Owen-Towle (Excerpt, full text at
http://jesspages.net/bestofuu/10/to-grow-toward-whom-we-might-become#more-67)
…Unitarian Universalism, at its finest and fullest, demands far more of its adherents than
rugged independence. It requires that we become builders and sustainers of the interdependent
web wherever we’re planted.
…Psychologist author Scott Peck claims that “in and through community lies the salvation
of the world. Nothing is more important.” I believe that, I bet my life on that conviction.
However, Peck makes critical distinctions between pseudo-community, a smug collective,
where members feel settled and cozy and genuine community, a growing connection that
requires enormous energy and time, commitment and daring.
I’ve often thought when folks come to worship on Sunday, we should hand out orders of
service with a smile, to be sure, but also dispense hard-hats and life-preservers, because our
liberal religion isn’t risk-free, but a dangerous zone, where we’re going to be challenged to halt
bad habits and make healthy choices. Come as you are, yes, but, …we are encouraged to grow
toward whom we might become!
…[G]rowing the Beloved Community right where you’re planted, is your primary
purpose…. The Beloved Community includes you, yes, but it always transcends you and your
individual interests….
I first caught a glimpse of the Beloved Community, its power and pertinence, when I went
by bus to Selma, Alabama back in 1965 as a San Francisco Theological School greenhorn. I’d
never been in the South before. Our sole job as students, every day, was to clear the fields of
cow dung, followed by setting up huge tents for the civil rights marchers led by Dr. Martin
Luther King, Jr. You may recall that rabbis, priests, and ministers, from across the land, were
among the front-line protesters who responded to King’s summons to “put our bodies where the
trouble was.”
Our seminary president, Ted Gill contended that urging students and faculty to go to Selma,
Alabama, alongside himself, was the high point of his career, even though, he confessed, it cost
the seminary some $5 million dollars in lost revenue from disgruntled supporters. And my own
mother, years later, would second Gill’s sentiments: “Tom, as far as I’m concerned, you can
store all your awards away in the closet; even stock the basement of libraries with your fine
books, because your major achievement as a religious person was when you placed your
untested and frightened body on the line in Selma.”
Indeed, what a transformative week! In the evenings we enjoyed the stunning protestentertainment of Dick Gregory, Peter, Paul and Mary, and other such activist luminaries. Why
today you’d pay hundreds a night for such concerts.
And I’ll never forget Andy Young, then one of King’s moral lieutenants, shouting forth,
“Hey folks, you know why we’re here? We’re here to love the hell out of Alabama!” A bold,
brazen universalist decree, if there ever was one. In the same vein, we’d nightly huddle and belt
out the traditional civil rights song: I know one thing we did right, was the day we started to
fight, keep your eyes on the prize, hold on, hold on…
There we were: fellow Americans of multiple colors and religions and classes, doing our
modest share to bring about an end to legal segregation in our homeland. Some Americans like
Andrew Goodman and Jimmie Lee Jackson, as well as Viola Liuzzo and James Reeb (who
were both Unitarians), were murdered in this moral struggle. But at the end of this period, legal
equality had been won for persons of color. It’s critical to remember that all the social
movements of the 1960s and later (the anti-war movement, the women’s movement, and the
sexual orientation movement) followed in the wake of this civil rights effort.
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And the words of that protest song still ring relevant in human struggles for full dignity, at
home and abroad. For whatever battle is being waged throughout the universe–internally,
interpersonally, or internationally–we’d do well to keep these brave words in mind: “I know
one thing we did right, was the day we started to fight”–fight not for injury but for impact–to
battle for what’s fair and compassionate, to scrap for right relationships at home and work,
during play and throughout society.
We often forget that the nonviolence of Martin Luther King, Jr. wasn’t passive and weakkneed but tough-minded and strong-hearted. It resisted wrongdoing and challenged
slothfulness.
The civil rights campaigners whom I met in Selma, Alabama in 1965 …were willing to risk
their jobs, their homes, and even their lives to create an extraordinary movement–that, despite
setbacks and detours, has never abandoned the pursuit of the Beloved Community: a socialspiritual reality that includes yet always transcends our own skins, classes, orientations, and
beliefs.
In truth, the Beloved Community is rarely embodied by one place, one time, or one group
but ever widens its embrace to include outsiders, strangers, the marginalized. One more step,
one more embrace. The Beloved Community is always bigger than the imaginable, lies always
beyond the achievable.
…Or as King himself put it: “The end is reconciliation, the end is redemption, the end is the
creation of the Beloved Community.”
…It’s my conviction that growing the Beloved Community constitutes the preeminent goal
of liberal religious life. It’s our reason for existing as a social-spiritual entity, since it speaks to
our private hearts while confronting the public world. Beloved Community pulls and pushes us
in everything we resemble and risk as a religious adventure.
…The American poet, Carl Sandberg, became a committed member of the Unitarian Church
in Asheville, North Carolina. This is why. He said: You can’t go tramping around from parish
to parish and build anything up. Who would want to go on a picnic all the time and eat out of
other people’s baskets? You’ve got to feel the importance of your own individual participation
in its life.
…That’s our fervent prayer. That’s our sacred work. That’s our joyful privilege. That’s why
we exist…for the creation of the Beloved Community right here where we’re planted.
11.2: We Drink From Wells We Did Not Dig by Rev. Kirk Loadman-Copeland
Ancient civilizations first grew up along rivers, and, in a sense, the river was the mother of
civilization, which is why rivers like the Nile and the Ganges are considered sacred, which is
why all rivers should be considered sacred. Slowly, the ancients moved further and further
away from the “mother” to the extent that they were able to dig wells and have access to water.
The earliest known well, about 20 feet deep, was found at the Alit Yam settlement in Israel and
is thought to be about 10,000 years old
I wonder who dug the first well and why they thought that they would find water. Still,
humans quickly learned that there was water in the ground and by digging down to the top of
the water table or into an aquifer, you could find it. The realization that “we drink from wells
we did not dig” is not new; the phrase comes from chapter 6 of the book of Deuteronomy.
For thousands of years, wells were not privately owned, they were communal. In the way
that the hearth was the sacred center of a home, the well was the sacred center of the
community. If the well ran dry and other wells dug nearby to replace it did not yield water, the
community would have to move to a new location where a viable well could be dug.
The well was communal, as was its construction. Once the well was dug, it was lined with
wood or later stone. Someone had to fashion the wooden slats or quarry and finish the stone,
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and then install the well lining. Someone had to make the wooden bucket that would be used
for the well and the rope required to lower and raise the bucket. Imagine the elation, when all of
the work yielded that first cup of thirst quenching, living sustaining, clear, cold water.
We cannot create a Beloved Community until we have created a community, and we cannot
create a community, which is larger than the circle of a family or extended kinship network,
which is larger than a tribe until people emerge who have chosen to live beyond themselves;
who have some notion of the common good and work to broaden and deepen that goodness;
who have learned how to engage the stranger as a neighbor, realizing that absolutely everyone
is at first a stranger; and who invites others to live beyond themselves. We drink from wells we
did not dig because others lived beyond themselves.
In the book Dare to Live Now, Bruce Larson recounts the following: “Travelers across a
long and seldom used trail in the Amargosa Desert would pass an old pump that offered the
only hope of fresh drinking water along their journey. Wired to the pump handle was a baking
powder can and inside the can was a handwritten note: ‘This pump is all right as of June, 1932.
I put a new sucker washer into it and it ought to last five years. But the washer dries out and the
pump has got to be primed. Under the white rock I buried a bottle of water out of the sun, the
cork end up. There's enough water in it to prime the pump, but not if you drink some first. Pour
about one fourth and let her soak to wet the leather. Then pour in the rest medium fast and
pump like crazy. You'll git water. The well has never run dry. Have faith. When you git
watered up, fill the bottle and put it back like you found it for the next feller.’ (signed) Desert
Pete. ‘p.s. Don't go drinking up the water first. Prime the pump with it and you'll git all you can
hold.’”
Desert Pete clearly lived beyond himself, as did the people who originally dug the well, and
saved others by doing so. As importantly, he instructed others to live beyond themselves. Once
you have primed the pump, quenched your thirst, and filled all of your containers so that you
can continue on your journey, fill the bottle of water that Desert Pete left, put the cork in it, and
bury it again on the white rock so the next person will have the water necessary to prime the
pump and live, rather than dying of thirst. As Pete wrote, “Have faith. The well has never run
dry.” Have faith in the well. Have faith in your ability to prime the pump and get the water to
flow. Have faith that the person who came before you filled the bottle with water to prime the
pump and buried it under the white rock where you will find it. Have faith and then nurture
faith by refilling the bottle with water and burying it for the next stranger to find, the next
stranger who automatically becomes your neighbor by the simple act of filling and burying the
bottle, the next stranger whose life you save just like the Good Samaritan who lived beyond
himself by caring for the injured man lying on the side of the road that others had passed by.
Have faith in your ability to live beyond yourself, and have gratitude for those who have
come ahead of you, the well diggers and the Desert Petes who lived beyond themselves that
you might have life more abundant; the villagers who built and sustained the village once the
well was completed.
We are ever bound in community and called to respond with gratitude to this reality. At its
core, gratitude is a religious response. Gratitude is an attitude of the heart, a discipline of the
mind that invites us to return again and again to thanksgiving, to thanks-living in which we
express our gratitude to others with whom we are bound in community. Gratitude is a song of
the soul that sings in us. Through its expression, we are changed as are those to whom we sing.
Gratitude is a way of living beyond our selves, a spiritual practice that encourages others to live
beyond themselves. It is a key ingredient in sustaining community; and it is the first step in
creating beloved community.
In his 1965 novel, The Source, James Michener recounted the 10,000 year history of an
archaeological site in northern Israel called Makor, a Hebrew word that means “source.”
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Michener unfolded the epic using 15 artifacts recovered from 15 different levels of the “tell,”
which is a mound built up over the millennia by the generations of people living there. At the
material level, the “source” refers to the well at the site that sustained human life for
generations. At the symbolic level, the source refers to the religious faith that sustained the
human spirit over the centuries.
Those who dig wells and those who explore the depths of the human spirit are searching for
the source. They know that most of the time you must go deeper to reach it, whether it is the
wellspring that fills the well or the wellspring that nourishes the soul. If you are digging by
hand, it will take a long time to dig a well, a long time to go deep enough to reach the source of
the water. If you are seeking to go deeper in your own life, using your heart and mind as well as
your hands as the tools of exploration, it will take time and patience, courage and persistence,
and companionship and questioning to go deep enough to satisfy the yearnings of your soul, to
quench the thirst that water cannot satisfy, to take you far enough beyond yourself that you
become a force in creating, deepening, and expanding Beloved Community for yourself to be
sure, but for others as well who will learn by your example, who will benefit by your wisdom,
and who will be transformed by your compassion. They will drink from the metaphorical wells
that you dig. They will find your note that reads, “Have faith. The well will never go dry.”
11.3: Our Beloved Community by Rev. Charles J. Stephens (Excerpt, full text at
http://www.uucwc.org/2009/12/06/our-beloved-community/)
The Reverend Doctor Martin Luther King, Jr. upheld and popularized the vision of the
Beloved Community during the stormy years of the Civil Rights Movement. Writing about
Doctor King’s address at the 1963 March on Washington, James Baldwin said, “That day, for a
moment, it almost seemed that we stood on a height, and could see our inheritance; perhaps we
could make the kingdom real, perhaps the Beloved Community would not forever remain that
dream one dreamed in agony!”
Doctor King believed the Beloved Community was achievable, not only for a small group or
for even a religious organization. He believed that, if only enough people were trained and
committed to the spirit of love and justice and to the nonviolent life he professed and lived, it
could become a reality in the world.
The Beloved Community concept existed in the minds and lives of numerous religious
social activists long before Martin Luther King, Jr. popularized it by how he lived and in the
words he so elegantly spoke. In the very early years of the 1900’s, “The Beloved Community”
was a term used by philosopher-theologian Josiah Royce. Royce helped form the Fellowship of
Reconciliation. The F.O.R., as it is called, was an organization that began working for peace in
1914 when a religious conference was forced to break up and disband because of World War I.
John Haynes Holmes, a Unitarian minister, was one of the earliest American leaders of the
F.O.R. …Richard Diets, …long time executive director of the F.O.R. …wrote that Reverend
Holmes said that most people generally believe war is wrong, but nonetheless they go on
justifying each particular war placing the claims of the nation state below that of religious faith.
Holmes wrote, “No one is wise enough, no nation is important enough; no human interest is
precious enough, to justify the wholesale destruction and murder which constitute the science
of war.” The Unitarian congregation in Manhattan, New York, which Reverend Holmes served,
changed its name to Community Church because of the importance he placed on the Beloved
Community.
…In the 1950’s Rustin became an important connection between the F.O.R., the Reverend
Martin Luther King, Jr. and King’s adoption of nonviolence as his signature principle. The
F.O.R. became King’s active supporter in the earliest years of the Civil Rights Movement. The
fascinating connection among these inspiring and courageous leaders always strikes me. (Gary
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Herstein, The Roycean Roots of the Beloved Community, The Pluralist – Vol. 4, # 2, Summer
2009, pp. 91-107)
When preaching about the Beloved Community, the Reverend Tom Owen-Towle, a retired
Unitarian Universalist colleague, said, “I’ve often thought when folks come to worship on
Sunday, we should hand out orders of service with a smile, to be sure, but also dispense hardhats and life-preservers, because our liberal religion isn’t risk-free, but a dangerous zone, where
we’re going to be challenged to halt bad habits and make healthy choices. Come as you are,
yes, but… we’re encouraged to grow toward who we might best become!”
…Living by your principles is not risk-free. If you really live your principles, you may put
yourself in a danger zone. That is what we are called to do. The poet Adrienne Rich was feeling
a deep and abiding call to live her principles when she wrote: “My heart is moved by all I
cannot save:/ So much has been destroyed/ I have to cast my lot with those/ Who age after age,
perversely,/ With no extraordinary power/ Reconstitute the world.” My question to you; is your
heart moved by all you cannot save? Are you ready to cast your lot with those “who age after
age, perversely, with no extraordinary power reconstitute the world?”
A great Unitarian minister and professor, James Luther Adams, reveled a great deal about
his theology when he said, “By their groups ye shall know them.” With what groups do you
hang around? Adams, born in 1901, was a strong believer in the importance of belonging to
groups and a community. He taught and wrote a great deal about the importance of voluntary
associations. He stressed the importance of our “free church tradition” as being a group of
believers who of their own choice join together in the spirit of love. He believed that our
community with its value of inclusiveness and dissent was governed not by creed or doctrine
but by the importance of freedom of dissent within the community, thus the need to remain
non-doctrinal. Adams often warned, “People can die from hardening of the categories.”
Our Beloved Community is built on the shoulders of all those who are not afraid of
inclusiveness or dissent but who are willing to be governed by the spirit of the love that
individual members have for one another and by an overarching commitment to build a society
in the spirit of love and justice.
We are called to build our liberal religious community …into a stronger, more vibrant and
powerful force. Why the need to be powerful? Because the spirit of love needs to expand to
include more and more people here…, …in our country, but also throughout the entire world.
The Beloved Community of which we are one part is much larger than any one ethnic
group, one race or one color. The Beloved Community is much larger than any single political
party, economic class, city, state or nation. The Beloved Community is much larger than any
one church or one religion. We must widen our vision of the Beloved Community so that our
strength can be renewed.
Thus, our Beloved Community is emboldened by love and empowered by a rage against
injustice. Our Beloved Community can aid your personal transformation and the transformation
of our society. Our Beloved Community is a dream of how life might one day be with a firm
grasp of the reality of the continued oppression that exists around us. Our Beloved Community
is our deepest hope for the human family, while at the same time we are aware that we are
being called …to help end oppression.
We are called to join with others to help transform our …communities by living according
to the spirit of love and justice. We are called to join in with others to help transform our
society [in] to one based on justice, equality and compassion. Our Beloved Community is
present here and now, but it is also a vision of what is yet to become.
…I invite you to come to our Beloved Community as you are, but know, we will challenge
you to be open to growing and expanding to exemplify the core principles of our Beloved
Community; the inclusive spirit of love and justice.
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11.4: I’m Sorry by Rev. Marni Harmony (Excerpt, full text at
http://www.uutarpon.org/uutarpon_sermon__march06.htm)
…[W]hat holds us in right relations with each other? I think the central tenant of community
can be described in only two words: “I’m sorry,” [which] is the art of apology – of being able
to credibly and regretfully acknowledge an offense or failure.
…It’s hard to deliver an authentic apology unless one approaches it with a sense of
humility… of understanding that we momentarily slipped our moral leash and caused hurt.
…If we can accept the premise that none of us are perfect all the time -- that all of us come
into the world with the potential to do harm, then we are able to catch a glimpse of our
interrelatedness as broken people. It is comforting to me to think of myself as part of the great
mass of humanity that often falls short of expectations of ourselves and others. And it’s also
nice to know that when I mess up, I have recourse for my shortcomings. I can apologize. I can
atone.
One of the foundational documents of our Unitarian Universalist movement is Hosea
Ballou’s “Treatise on Atonement”, published in 1805. Very simply, it counters the Calvinist
view of trying to pacify an angry God. Ballou regarded sin as finite, and therefore he took it far
less seriously than did the Calvinists. He said, “[sin is] the violation of a law which exists in the
mind, which law is the imperfect knowledge men have of moral good.” Ballou thought that the
most that human beings can do is come to the best understanding of moral good that is possible
for them and act accordingly. To sin is to do otherwise. He held that Jesus' mission on Earth
was indeed to save us from our fallen and sinful selves through his life and teachings which can
call and guide us from our less-than-perfect selves to a more wholistic and restored and
reconciled-to-God state of living. Jesus' death was held up as an example of what it can
sometimes mean to remain faithful to your principles, values, and calling, rather than as an act
of atonement for the sins of humanity. Our theologian James Luther Adams stated this rather
more simply 150 years later by observing that Unitarian Univeralist Christians are
distinguished by following the teachings OF Jesus, rather than the teachings ABOUT Jesus.
…There are two aspects of atonement: repentance and forgiveness. The repentance part
says, “I’m Sorry.” It’s hard to admit you made a mistake. It’s even harder to admit you make a
mistake that you knew – going into it – was going to result in hurting someone. But the hardest
part of saying you’re sorry is that it only works if you mean it. It doesn’t matter how justified
you think you were. You have to truly be sorry that your actions (or non-actions) resulted in
causing hurt. And here’s the real kicker to repentance: You have to be sorry without an
expectation of forgiveness.
…The second part of atonement -- forgiveness – isn’t easy either. Here’s what forgiveness is
NOT. It’s not forgetfulness. You’ve no doubt heard the phrase, “Forgive and Forget.” That’s
nonsense. Forgetfulness is a lot of things – old age being one of them – but it’s not forgiveness.
Our memories and the scars we bear from living our lives are what define us. Let’s keep our
memories as long as we can.
…Another thing forgiveness is not is revenge. I wish it were because then I’d feel so
RIGHTEOUS for having balanced the scales of justice ALL BY MYSELF. But that’s not my
job. I don’t think it’s yours either. We don’t have a bandage for revenge.
I think what forgiveness IS is compassionate remembrance. I’ve had plenty of chances to
practice this – and I’m still practicing. But here are four steps in a forgiveness process that I
find helpful. The first step is to forego. Just leave the event alone – don’t pick at the scab. Find
something else to engage your mind -- a person or project to capture your full attention.
Whenever I feel like picking at my wounds I go find an opportunity to feed people or visit with
someone. A little perspective is very helpful.
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The second step to forgiveness is to forebear – to abstain from punishing. Don’t pick the
scab off someone else. This is not to say that people should remain silent in the face of injustice
or mistreatment. It is one thing to use passive resistance as a political tool, but quite another to
be silent in order to survive an impossible situation of corrupt or unjust power in the family,
community, or world. But remember that this is not about revenge or setting the universe on
your highway to the way things should be. Our greatest temptation is to try to change other
people instead of ourselves. Resist this temptation to punish or change another. Just as you
leave your scab alone, leave theirs alone, too.
The third step to forgiveness is allow the event to be relegated to the background or move
off stage. Change the bandage color to a flesh tone and go on about your business. This
refocusing it is an active endeavor and is central to the practice of centering prayer and other
forms of meditation. What it does is lay the emotion surrounding the memory to rest. You don’t
forget the event – you deprive it of emotional fuel.
The fourth and final step to forgiveness is to consciously decide to stop harboring
resentment. All emotion, even rage, carries knowledge, insight, what some call enlightenment.
So allow yourself to be taught by your hurt. Learn from it. Forgiveness does not mean giving
up one’s protection, but one’s coldness. Forgiveness means giving up your coldness.
…Forego. Forbear. Refocus. Forgive. The cycle of rage is like any other cycle; it rises, falls,
dies, and is released as new energy. You’ll know when the cycle is complete – when the wound
is healed -- when you feel sorrow over the circumstance instead of rage. You will feel sorry for
the person rather than angry with him, understanding that suffering drove the offense. The
wound is healed when you have nothing left to say about it. YOU ARE NOT WAITING FOR
ANYTHING. YOU ARE NOT WANTING ANYTHING. Only when the cycle of rage is
remembered and repented can the energy required for the work of reconciliation – atonement -begin.
…We Unitarian Universalists have promised each other – have covenanted – to stay in
relationship and work on loving each other even when we don’t like each other very much. I’m
sorry to break this to you folks new to Unitarian Universalism, but we come to this community,
not to find people we love, but to love the people who are here. We are here --- in this place -at this time -- to love the people who are here. This is the essence of covenant. In this close
relationship, we will eventually and inevitably have disagreements and say things that wound.
None of us are exempt from hurting and being hurt. That’s why love means ALWAYS having
to say you’re sorry; not from a stance of groveling, but from an authentic attitude of humility
and a willingness to restore right relations ... to mend fences.
August 2012
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