SANS CLUE HASH, RUN 554
ATTENDANCE :14 PEOPLE.
- USUAL MEETING PLACE : PARKING LOT AT GARCHES RAILWAY
STATION.
- WE CAR POOLED TO ST CLOUD FOR THE START OF THE RUN.
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..
DESERVING OF ITS NAME, THE "SANS CLUE HASH" DID NOT
DISAPPOINT. THERE WAS ANOTHER CONFUSION WITH NO FIXED
PLACE TO START, NO DESIGNATED HARE AND STILL NO VOLUNTEER
FOR A LIVE RUN. WE EVENTUALLY FOUND A SATISFACTORY SPOT
AND OUR BRAVE "GORF", ONCE AGAIN, CAME TO THE RESCUE. (
WHAT SHALL WE DO WITHOUT HIM WHEN HE DISPAPEARS INTO
BANGLADESH NEXT JUNE ? ) ..
"GORF", OF COURSE, BEING THE ATHLETE THAT HE IS , HAD
THE RUN OF THE PACK.
WELL "GORF" GAVE US OUR MONEY'S WORTH OF RUNNING, NEVER
STOPPING: LIKE THE EVERREADY BUNNY. MOREOVER HE WAS
WEARING A PALE YELLOW SWEATSHIRT JUST LIKE A FRENCH
LAPIN. SO WE RAN AND RAN AND RAN, NEVER FINDING THE
SOUGHT AFTER RELIEF OF THE MUCH AWAITED BEER STOP. WE
FINALLY DECIDED TO IMPROVISE ONE SINCE "ANAL CONDOM", THE
GOOD SPORT, HAD BEEN TRANSPORTING HEAVY BEER PACKS IN HIS
BACKPACK ALL THE WAY. THEN OUT OF THE WOODS CAME "GORF",
FULLY CONFUSED AS WHY WE HAD NOT FOLLOWED HIM TILL THE
END. HE THOUGHT HE HAD US BY THE NOSE, NO, I MEAN BY THE
LEGS .. HA HA , BUT WE HAD THE BOOZE MY FRIEND !
"GORF" DELIVERED A SUPERB RUN WITH ALL THE PERKS (
FALSIES, MANY CHECKS, DOUBLE ARROWS ). WE FIRST WENT
THROUGH THE MAGNIFICENT FORMAL FRENCH GARDENS OF THE NOW
DEFUNCT CASTLE OF ST CLOUD. WE ADMIRED THE BEAUTIFUL
STATUES , THE MAJESTIC FOUNTAINS AND THE BREATHTAKING VIEW
OF PARIS WITH THE PICTURE PERFECT EIFFEL TOWER IN THE
MIDDLE. THEN OUR RUN TOOK US THROUGH MANY WINDING PATHS
AND CLIMBING HILLS IN THE WOODED PARTS OF THE ESTATE. AN
ASSORTMENT OF TERRAIN AND LANDSCAPE, A TRAIL THAT WAS
DELIBERATELY MADE DIFFICULT WITH SPARSE FLOWER SPOTS, LOTS
OF SCOUTING AND CALLING, AN OCCASIONAL RAIN SHOWER TO
BREAK THE SUNNY COLD WEATHER AND WE HAD ALL THE
INCREDIENTS FOR AN INTERESTING RUN.
WE HAD THE CIRCLE IN THE CAR PARK OF OUR STARTING POINT,
UNDER THE PROTECTION OF A ROAD OVERPASS. "LIKES A LONG
ONE" HAD BROUGHT WHAT SEEMED LIKE A FEAST TO THE COLD AND
HUNGRY RUNNERS THAT WE WERE, A FOLDING TABLE AND A
WONDERFUL SPREAD OF GOODIES, INCLUDING THE STILL WARM HOME
BAKED APFEL STRUDEL THAT HAD US SALIVATING TILL THE END.
BY THEN IT WAS GETTING VERY COLD AND I OVERHEARD THE 2
RUSKIES FROM MOSCOW AGREEING WITH THE 2 GIRLS FROM ALASKA
THAT IT WAS COLD INDEED. WELL THAT MADE ME FEEL BETTER TO
SEE ONE OF THE RUSSIANS GIRLS DANCING ON HER FEET TO WARM
HERSELF AND WE ALL SANG "KALINKA" AND JOINED HER !
AT
THE END OF THIS POLAR CIRCLE, MOST OF THE BUNCH GATHERED
IN SEVERAL CARS TO GO AND WATCH A REPLAY OF THE RUGBY
MATCH AT "THE CELTIC CORNER", THE USUAL DRINKING HOLE FOR
HASHERS MADE FAMOUS BY "ICEMAN" OUR BEERMEISTER WHO LIVES
AND WORKS IN THE VICINITYOF THIS BOOZE TRAP. MAYBE HE
FINALLY FELL VICTIM OF HIS VICE AND COLLAPSED ON THE BEER
COOLER BEFORE PUTTING IT IN THE TRUNK/BOOT OF HIS CAR. HE
HAS NOT BEEN SEEN ON THE HASH FOR WEEKS. THIS IS WHY
"ANAL CONDOM" WAS PLAN B ( AS IN BEER, YOU MORONS ! ) IN
THE BEER RESCUE OPERATION. TWO AMONG THE OLDER HASHERS ,
"HALF CRAZY" AND "RETURN TO SENDER" DECIDED THAT A HOT
BATH WAS FAR MORE ATTRACTIVE THAN A LITER OF COLD BEER (
THAT MUST COME WITH AGE ) AND DECLINED THE PUB REUNION.
NOW FOR THE CRIMES
AND DOWN DOWNS:
>>>> "MAKE ME AN OFFER" : FOR WEARING THE DECATHLON LOGO
IN A DAY THAT CALLED FOR THE TOTAL BANISHMENT OF THIS
TRADEMARK ON ANY SPORTSWEAR.
>>>> HALF CRAZY, FUCKING FAN, GORF, DESPERATE FOR ALLAN,
RETURN TO SENDER, FOR BEING FRENCH NATIVES AND HENCE NOT
MAKING THE LIST OF THE COUNTRIES WITH THE WORLD HIGHEST
CONSUMPTION OF BEER. CZECHOSLOVAKIA IS THE WINNER IN CASE
YOU DIDN'T KNOW. AND THIS WITHOUT THE HELP OF ANHEUSER
BUSH IN ST LOUIS, MO ( PRODUCER OF THE AMERICAN BUDWEISER
). NEXT TIME WE SHALL HAVE A DOWN DOWN FOR ANYONE NOT
BEING ABLE TO SPELL CORRECTLY THIS EASTERN EUROPEAN
COUNTRY . FRENCHIES , BEWARE ! ...
>>>> MA BOUCHE: FOR BEING DRUNK , SLUMPED AND SNORING IN A
PARIS METRO CAR.
>>>> HATS IN THE CIRCLE : RAMBOLLOCKS AND DESPERATELY
SEEKING ALAN .
VISITORS:
>>>> TWO ALASKAN GIRLS FROM JUNEAU:
JENNIFER WAS MADE TO COME BY 2 GUYS IN ALASKA (
NO PRECISIONS: WAS SHE SENT SO SHE COULD TEST AND REPORT
ON HOW THE FRENCH "DO IT " ? ). THE WEATHER IS COLD BUT
THE MEN ARE NOT I ASSURE YOU.
THE OTHER JUNEAU GIRL : "DO ME DECIMAL" WAS
HEARD AS "DO ME DOUCEMENT" BY "MA BOUCHE" AND IT
EXTRACTED GOOD LAUGHS FROM THE CIRCLE.
>>>> TWO RUSSIAN GIRLS FROM MOSCOW: ANTONINA ("007": Ed)
WHO REVEALED SHE IS ONE OF "SLACK MACK" ENCOUNTERS IN
MOSCOW ( HUM ! ) . DID SHE MENTION TO HIM SHE WAS COMING
TO VISIT AND HE RAN OFF TO SKI IN THE FRENCH ALPS ? MARINA
IS THE OTHER MOSCOVITE WHO CAME ALONG TO CHECK ABOUT
"FRENCH STUFF".
RETURNEES:
- "RAMBOLLOCKS" WHO HAS NOT BEEN SEEN MOST OF THE
WINTER ( HE WAS TOO BUSY CHOPPING WOOD FOR HIS DATCHA ).
"DESPERATE FOR ALAN" WHO HAD BEEN BUSY LOOKING FOR HER
MISPLACED CITY HANDBAG/PURSE FOR MONTHS ( THIS IMPLEMENT
IS USUALLY ATTACHED TO HER RIGHT HAND AND WAS FELT LIKE AN
AMPUTATION ).
A PRESENT WAS WAITING FOR HER, SENT BY FIONA FROM IRELAND
AND PRESENTED IN THE CIRCLE BY MA BOUCHE: A COMPLETE
MELAMINE PLATE SET WITH THE TRADITIONAL 4 LEAF CLOVER ON
IT SO SHE WOULD NOT LOSE HER PURSE AGAIN. SHE DUTIFULLY
DRANK THE MAGIC POTION IN THE SOUP BOWL.
FUCKING FAN FULFILLED HIS DUTY AS THE OFFICIAL LADIES MAN
OF THE SANS CLUE HASH ( HIS TRADEMARK: TWINKLE IN THE EYE,
SLY SMILE, SUGGESTIVE BEHAVIOR, ALWAYS WISPERING HIS
HONORABLE SERVICES TO OUR FEMALES ). AH FRANCE WOULD NOT
BE THE SAME WITHOUT HIM ! HE IS OUR ACTING PHOTOGRAPHER :
SOUVENIR SHOTS OF *ALL KINDS* CAN BE FOUND ON THE WEBSITE.
...............................YOURS TRULY ,
................. RETURN TO SENDER