Formulating a parallel thesis statement

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10th GRADE
Student Packet
FOCUS: Writing Thesis Statements
Name_________________________________
Session 1A—Modified Miami Dade County District
Materials:
HOW TO WRITE A THESIS STATEMENT
1. Have students examine the writing prompt carefully.
2. Tell students to use some of the language from the prompt in
their thesis statement.
3. The thesis statement should introduce the main points to be
discussed in the writing piece.
4. Remind them to write a thesis statement, not a question.
I. The thesis statement in an Expository essay will tell your
audience:
a. what you are going to explain to them
b. the order you are using to organize your explanation
II.
In a Persuasive essay, students should brainstorm their
topic and make a “pro’s & con’s” list to facilitate making a
decision.
To narrow the focus, identify strong reasons from the
brainstorm list. The reasons should all support your
position.
Expository Prompt: Explain why a healthy diet is important.
Strong Thesis:
A healthy diet is important because it increases your energy level, prevents
illness, and promotes longevity.
Weak Thesis: Too narrow: People should include five servings of fruits and
vegetables in their diet every day.
Persuasive Prompt: Convince your reader whether or not school uniforms
should be mandatory in public schools.
Strong Thesis:
School uniforms should not be mandatory in public schools because it would
stifle students’ creativity, take away students’ rights, and cause students to
lose interest in school.
Weak Thesis:
Too narrow:
Students who are forced to wear school uniforms have their creativity stifled.
Try to formulate a parallel thesis
Parallelism
Grammatical parallelism - maintaining balance by using the
same part of speech (for instance, all adjectives) or the
same part of the sentence (for example, all clauses)
 Non-parallel: "She likes dancing, swimming, and
to box."
 Parallel: "She likes dancing, swimming, and
boxing."
 Non-parallel: "He admires people with strong
convictions, forceful characters, and who think for
themselves."
 Parallel: "He admires people with strong
convictions, forceful characters, and independent
minds."
 Parallel: "He admires people who have strong
convictions, who have morals, and who think for
themselves." (wordier but grammatical)
Conceptual parallelism - maintaining balance by keeping all
three parts at the same level of generality
Non-parallel: "She likes dancing, swimming, and
breathing."
Parallel: "She likes dancing, swimming, and boxing."
Practice formulating parallel thesis
statements
--J. Fishbein
Sample Prompt:
Most teenagers have chores. Think
about why it is important for
teenagers to have chores. Now write
to explain why it is important for
teenagers to have chores.
 The thesis statement is the central premise
of the entire essay.
 By reading this one sentence the reader
knows what the entire essay will set out to
prove.
 The thesis is usually 3 pronged.
 The thesis sentence stating 3 reasons in one
sentence is the last sentence of the
introduction.
 (Use semi-colons if each one of your reasons
is a sentence unto itself.)
 The thesis should reiterate the prompt and
repeat keywords in the prompt if necessary.
 Make sure your thesis sentence states 3
distinct, separate reasons.
 Try to make the thesis parallel.
 ORDER OF REASONS—SAME IN THESIS AND
BODY PARAGRAPHS: The order in which you
state your reasons in the thesis should be the
same order in which you place them in your
body paragraphs.
Sample parallel thesis: Teenagers should have
chores because having chores teaches teens
skills they need in the real world, alleviates
the amount of work parents have to do, and
inculcates a sense of responsibility.
Assigned Prompt:
Americans are facing an obesity epidemic.
Think of reasons why Americans are gaining
weight and becoming obese.
Write to explain reasons that Americans are
fighting a weight battle.
Part 1 --Directions:
1. Write a thesis statement for the following Expository
Writing Prompt.
2. Show it to your neighbor(s) and get feedback.
(Your peers may write comments on your paper.)
3. This is a formative assessment graded using the codes: Got it, Almost Got it,
Beginning to get it.
Questions to ask yourself:
 Is the thesis one sentence?
 Is it parallel?
 Does it reiterate keywords in the prompt?
Part 2-- Directions:
1. Revise the thesis statement for the following Expository
Writing Prompt based on the feedback your peers gave you.
2. Show it to your teacher and get feedback.
Part 3 – Self-reflection: What did you learn from this process?
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