GRAHAM & WANDA ASHBY 73 Ardgowan Rd, 1-D R.D. Oamaru. 9492
Email – 73gawa@gmail.com
www.gaministry.co.nz
Ph. (03) 434 7315
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Thank you for your willingness to host the Marriage Matters Seminars.
Outlined below are some suggestions that Wanda and I have found to be the best and
most effective way to conduct these Seminars. You are under no obligation to follow
these ideas, but, over the last five years we have fine-tuned and experimented with
different formats. These are our well learned suggestions.
Wanda and I have developed four separate, stand alone Marriage Matters
Seminars.
Our target audience is anyone who is married, engaged, in a relationship - All age groups,
church affiliated or non-church attenders. Our presentation is non-threatening, nonpreachy and no one will be embarrassed by being there. We make each two hour Seminar
practical, thoughtful, filled with a lot of common sense and humour. Wanda and I share
our faith during each seminar and explain that our marriage is ‘normal’ but for us, God is
at the centre of all our decisions. Not once have we received negative feedback from the
hundreds who have attended over the years in regard to sharing our faith. For us, it’s a
natural part of the presentation.
Venue:
Finding a neutral venue rather than your church facility can be beneficial to attracting
non-church people to this event. They may feel more comfortable in a non-church
atmosphere. If however, your invited guests would be at ease in your church building,
feel free to accommodate the Seminars there.
Seminar One:
The most successful idea that we have used is conducting Seminar One on a Friday
evening. Starting at 6.30pm. You would order from a Chinese Restaurant enough food to
feed the numbers that have registered. This means that the church hosts have no cooking
responsibilities, which in turn means that they can invite their neighbours and friends. If
you use paper plates, this too can make the cleanup quick and efficient.
As a host you will need to provide a fruit drink for your guests and we would suggest
small edibles/nibbles on each table for your guests to enjoy.
We give each person a small booklet to write in and take notes. We provide the pencils.
If it is possible, we suggest groupings of 4-6 people at each table where they can enjoy
their meal and of course write in their books during the evening.
All tables would need to be facing the screen which we use for the media presentation
during our speaking. Please advise if you don’t have a data projector. I will bring my
own.
We start the Seminar at 7.30 and conclude at 9.30pm. Included in this time is a coffee and
biscuit break.
Sometimes folk have asked questions after we’ve finished. We are very happy to
accommodate this. We also remind them that tomorrow night, if they come earlier then
we will be there to answer further questions if needed.
Some hosts have concluded the evening with another hot drink. So leaving time can be
anytime between 9.45pm and 10pm. Most folk will have babysitters to get back to.
Seminar Two:
Starting on the Saturday evening at 6.30pm but this time as a Coffee and Dessert only.
We would announce this on the Friday evening so people have their main meal before
they come.
The dessert can be simple with different church folk being asked to bring something by
the hosts e.g. Fruit salad, Cheesecakes / Pavalovas and Ice-cream.
Depending on numbers, hopefully we can be underway with the Seminar by 7.15pm.
The same format as the previous Seminar will apply with nibbles and drinks available on
each table.
During Seminar Two, we ask the couples to take the time to talk with each other about
issues that we have raised. At approx 8.45 we suggest they grab a cup of coffee/tea, find a
private place in the building and spend 15-20 minutes talking to each other. I will call
them back for the final presentation. Other rooms at the venues may need to be heated if
this is in winter time.
Conclusion will be between 9.15 – 9.30pm.
The Marriage Seminar booklets are produced here in Oamaru for each Seminar. They are
made to order as per the number attending the Seminar. We will pass on to you the
invoice for the making of these booklets. We ask for a separate cheque for the making of
these booklets please.
Expenses:
The host of the evening may want to have a donation box left somewhere prominent for
people to help with the covering of the meal and other expenses. Many people who have
attended the Seminars have asked how they can contribute. A donation box is the easiest
way to accommodate their willingness to help.
No pressure should be applied to those who attend the Seminars to contribute. As we
understand it, this is an outreach to your community and as such will cover all expenses.
Check List:

Invitations sent to people by at least three weeks before Seminar.
Ask them to register for catering and booklet number purposes.

Event organizer to arrange venue, seating and tables setup and introduction of
Graham & Wanda.

Co-ordinator to arrange the meal/dessert/drinks/nibbles on tables.

Sound system – two microphones, one each for Graham & Wanda.

Sound cord for Laptop to speaker system.

Data projector and Screen
We hope this gives you a general guideline as to the standard which we hope you will
host the Marriage Matters Seminar. We do look forward to having a memorable time
with you all, as together, we work towards strengthening, deepening and encouraging all
who attend.
Please don’t hesitate to contact us should you have further enquiries.
Blessings as you work towards our time together.
Graham & Wanda Ashby
73 Ardgowan Road
1-D R.D
Oamaru.
Ph. – 03 434 7315
Mob. – 021 05888 07
Email – 73gawa@gmail.com
Seminar 1#
Wanda and I develop the fact that ‘Men are different than Woman’.
We think differently, act differently and work differently.
We talk about the seven stages of Marriage and how both partners need a plan.
We discuss what stops love and look at how finances can stress a relationship.
Issues addressed are - What it means to be a Husband / Father, Wife/Mother and how
every relationship needs initiative.
Seminar 2#
What actually is love? Why is it important? Why do so many fail at it?
Conflict is another issue that is often not talked about. In this Seminar we will elaborate
on Fighting Fair and thinking from the other persons’ perspective.
We also introduce the Five Love Languages that has been authored and popularized by
Dr Gary Chapman. Once people know their love language and their partner’s primary
love language it is so much easier to grow deeper and deeper in love.
Seminar 3#
Up-skilling is important in any industry. The same is correct for Marriage. Tonight’s
Seminar will address His and Her Needs. We will explain why they are different and how
we can help our partner reach their full potential. Building and repairing damaged
relationships is also an important part of any relationship. Marriage isn’t about finding
the right partner it’s about becoming the right partner.
Seminar 4#
Future proofing – what to do before it all goes wrong. This evening we will tackle things
that women misunderstand about men and things that men struggle to understand about
woman. i.e. Respect, Insecurity, Romance Sex, Emotions, Dysfunctions etc. We will also
elaborate on why the Five Love Languages are so important for positive family
communication and how understanding these Love Languages can change your whole
environment.