Jacob Brown & Amy Justis
2120 Palace Drive
Ye Old Kingdom Of Welsh, 21595
January 16, 2013
Royal Subjects
Town Square
1277 W. Urchin Street
Ye Old Kingdom Of Welsh, 21595
Dear Loyal Subjects
Due to recent events of disloyalty, I the King and the Queen have determined to advance taxes once more this month. If one has a concern with this royal proclamation, they shall take it up with myself or the queen. We have also created a secret police to make sure that this kingdom shall be free of negative complaints to our decree. With this proclamation we have decided on a few new laws. They are listed below, as well as their royal punishment.
Royal Decree #79:
Thou shall not complain about tax increase or pay cuts due to town reasoning. If caught thou shall sing in town square the song of What Makes You Beautiful. This song is from the 21 st century in Great Britain by the artists that go by the name of One Direction.
Royal Decree#80:
Thou shall present an offering of tumpence and pennies on St. Stephen’s Day to the wren when a young group of Irish men come to thy threshold. Deficiency to do so will result in having to dance the Chicken
Dance.
Royal Decree #81:
Thou shall not use any magical spells or trickery on the royal castle grounds. The using of such shall result in incarceration for 25 years. The only way to exit the jail is to pay 250 tumpence and 44 pennies in taxes.
Royal Decree #82:
Thou shall not fight in town squares or pubs. The only time this is allowed is when the queen or I call for a duel or tournament of such sorts. Punishment is to be forced to listen to the worst version of the 21 st century Call Me Maybe sung by the worst singers ever.
Royal Decree #83
Thou shall not write too much fiction, especially magical spells and nonsense of that nature. The penalty for doing so is being exploited in the guild.

Jacob Brown & Amy Justis
Final Royal Decree #84:
Thou shall not own 7 puppets at ones house, a limit of 7 per person per household, unless you have the duty of being the royal puppeteer. The punishment for acting so is to eat the queen’s pudding pie, and all other horrific feast foods. (She can’t cook worth a horse!)
Also, notice the queen’s birthday is soon to arrive, this year the queen will be 29. She hopes to see all of the royal subjects WITH HER PRESENTS at the royal ball. Below is a list of all of the presents she would like to receive:

One Direction

A new horse

Cook book (Trust me! My request!)

Anything you can find that has a gem inside or is gold
On final notice about the tax increase they will increase by 25%. We hope to use this money for medical research due to the recent plague outbreak. Sir Lancelot will be joining the council to talk about this subject at the next council meeting. Any news following this proclamation will be posted in town square.
The queen would like to add that the standard messaging plans are down to only 10 pigeons per month.
This new contract will start on the 30th of February. Yes, if anyone has noticed the default in this message, you may have noticed the queen’s sense of humor. If you have not noticed the queen’s sense of humor, you must sign up for your monthly Pigeon-Mobile bill.
Sincerely
The king