Japanese Feudalism versus European Feudalism
The goal of this essay is to show specific instances where there were similarities or great differences
between the feudal systems in regions across the globe. The emphasis for this essay was on the
student’s ability to talk about the subject matter, combined with specific factual evidence.
* As always in a Social Studies essay, the content and knowledge of the writer is valued more than the mechanics of the
essay, however the following is considered to distract the reader and writers are accountable for the following:
capitalizing the beginning of sentences, ending sentences with periods, capitalizing proper nouns, avoiding obvious run
on sentences, properly using homophones such as their they’re and there, and last but not least proof reading and using
spell check.
Opening: Contains an opening/hook sentence, introduces to the reader
what the body paragraphs will be discussing without giving any specific
information, provides thesis of essay as the last sentence.
__________/5
Closing: Thesis is given as first sentence, the body paragraphs were
reviewed and the essay is appropriately ended.
__________/5
Body Paragraphs: Opens with an introductory goal of paragraph
sentence, factual evidence is given with a citation, the writer
introduces the facts, makes sense of the facts, and supports
the facts with his or her own writing/voice. Paragraphs are
appropriately ended.
__________/30 (10each)
Overall message: The message of the essay or argument
is clear, transitional phrases and powerful words are used to make the
authors point easy to follow, the thesis is revisited throughout the essay,
and each paragraph supports the message.
__________/10
Mechanics: capitalizing the beginning of sentences, ending sentences
with periods, capitalizing proper nouns, avoiding obvious run on
sentences, properly using homophones such as their they’re and there,
and last but not least proof reading and using spell check
__________/5
Research: Students used boxes and bullets to organize his or her own
thoughts, the bullets had citations, facts in essay were cited with a number,
**** the factual evidence in essay is valued in the body paragraphs******
__________/10