Memento mori
A memento mori (Latin 'remember that you will die') is an artistic or
symbolic reminder of the inevitability of death.
“Wemmick touched the largest of his mourning rings and said, ‘Sent out
to buy it for me, only the day before…These are all gifts of that kind.
One brings another, you see; that’s the way of it. I always take’em.
They may not be worth much, but, after all, they’re property and
portable.”
Great Expectations, Chapter 24
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Timepieces were formerly a reminder that your time on Earth
grows shorter with each passing minute.
Public clocks would be decorated with mottos such as ultima
forsan ("perhaps the last" [hour]) or vulnerant omnes, ultima
necat ("they all wound, and the last kills").
Post-mortem photography was very common in the nineteenth century, when death occurred in the home
and was quite an ordinary part of life.
A mourning ring is a finger ring worn in memory of someone who has died. It often bears the name and
date of death of the person, and possibly an image of them, or a motto. They were usually paid for by the
person commemorated, or their heirs, and often specified, along with the list of intended recipients, in wills.
In many cases, there is a lock of hair of the deceased placed under the crystal stone.
“So, we all put our pocket-handkerchiefs to our faces, as if our noses were bleeding, and filed out two and two; Joe
and I, Biddy and Pumblechook; Mr. and Mrs. Hubble. The remains of my poor sister had been brought round by the
kitchen door, and, it being a point of Undertaking ceremony that the six bearers must be stifled and blinded under a
horrible black velvet housing with a white border, the whole looked like a blind monster with twelve human legs,
shuffling and blundering along, under the guidance of two keepers – the postboy and his comrade.
“The neighbourhood, however, highly approved of these arrangements, and we were much admired as we went
through the village…”
Great Expectations, Chapter 35
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By the 19th century, mourning behavior in England had developed into a complex set of rules, particularly
among the upper classes. For women, the customs involved wearing heavy, concealing, black clothing
(known as “widow’s weeds”), and the use of heavy veils of black crêpe.
The wealthy could also wear cameos or lockets designed to hold a lock of the deceased's hair or some
similar relic.
How does your family (or culture) commemorate the death of loved ones?
What values do those commemorations suggest?
Assignment: Do ONE of the following:
Write an obituary for Mrs. Joe Gargery, OR…
Write an obituary for yourself. Include the accomplishments, awards, accolades and
milestones you expect to achieve by the time it appears (at some far, far future date).
How to Write an Obituary:
Nancy Besst, the Miss Nancy of 'Romper Room,' dies at 77
The lead: Provide the name and hometown of the deceased, and explain why readers might have heard of
his or her. Say when and where he/she died, and his/her age at the time of death.
Nancy Besst of San Rafael, who appeared as the Bay Area's original Miss Nancy on the children's
television show "Romper Room," died Aug. 14 after a long illness. She was 77.
"For those of us who were born and raised in the San Francisco area during the 1950s and '60s, 'Romper
Room' was part of our television culture," said Forrest Patten, who met Miss Besst while organizing a
gathering of former Bay Area children's television hosts.
"And for many of us, Miss Nancy Besst will always be the definitive hostess and teacher on the program.
She was a female counterpart to Mr. Rogers: gentle and patient, bringing a child-like wonder to her many
devoted viewers without being childish."
Background: Where and when was the deceased born? Where did he or she grow up? Where did he/she
go to school? Note: It is considered proper (and polite) to refer to the deceased with a title
(Mr./Mrs./Dr./etc.)
Born in Canton, Ohio, on May 25, 1934, Miss Besst graduated at the top of her class from that city's
McKinley High School and was crowned "Miss Canton" in a beauty pageant. She studied journalism at
Northwestern University in Evanston, Ill., serving as women's sports editor of The Daily Northwestern at
the same time that writer/director Garry Marshall was serving as men's sports editor.
In 1956, Miss Besst applied for a job with "Romper Room," a syndicated television show based in
Baltimore and hosted by "Miss Nancy" Claster. During the early days of television, Miss Besst traveled
throughout the country as a "Romper Room" staff teacher, helping television stations in other cities
develop their own, franchised versions of the program and training other women to serve as hosts.
Having visited the Bay Area more than once during her travels, Miss Besst decided to settle there. In
1958, "Miss Nancy" Besst became the host of the San Francisco incarnation of "Romper Room," first at
KGO and later at KTVU.
"'Romper Room' was the world's largest kindergarten," Miss Besst said in a 1988 Independent Journal
interview. "We always tried to keep it natural and spontaneous."
If possible, include anecdotes, quotes or stories that capture the personality of the deceased. You may
want to include quotes from family members, friends, co-workers or others who recognize their
contributions:
As a live television show featuring young children, "Romper Room" often required Miss Besst to think
fast on her feet. On one occasion, while performing a product demonstration, Miss Besst accidentally
sprayed a young cast member in the eyes with Bactine. On another occasion, the show had booked a
trained mynah bird named "Raja" who refused to talk — until the very end of the show.
"Nancy turned to the bird and asked Raja if he had any last words for the boys and girls," Patten said. "As
the camera zoomed in for a close-up, Raja looked straight into the lens and blurted out, 'one martini,
please.'"
She continued to host the show for 11 years, retiring in 1969. In addition to "Romper Room" staples such
as recitations of the Pledge of Allegiance and advice from the costumed Do Bee, Miss Besst placed her
own mark on the show with the creation of "Willie the Weather Man," a segment that helped children
figure out what clothes were appropriate to wear, depending on the weather.
During the last, and most famous segment of the show, Miss Besst looked through her "magic mirror" —
a decorated frame — to "see" viewers in her television audience.
"People would come up to her for the rest of her life and say 'You never said my name,' said her son, Pat
Townsley of San Anselmo, who still has the "magic mirrors" his mother used on the program.
Miss Besst married Air Force Capt. Pat Townsley, a fighter pilot stationed at Hamilton Field in Novato,
and settled in Terra Linda. In 1965, Mr. Townsley was killed when his F-101 Voodoo fighter-interceptor
crashed into San Pablo Bay. Pat, the couple's only child, was born four days later.
After retiring from "Romper Room," Miss Besst became one of the six founding members of the San
Francisco chapter of the National Academy of Television Arts and Sciences, and served as official hostess
of the Northern California Emmy Awards on several occasions. She was also active in fundraisers for
many organizations, including the Marin County Cerebral Palsy Association, and was an advocate for
positive, nonviolent children's television.
"TV is such a babysitter, and children are so vulnerable," Miss Besst said in 1988. "Learning should be
made fun — entertainment combined with education. We need more warmth."
List the spouse, children, and other family members who survive the deceased:
In addition to her son, Miss Besst is survived by two grandchildren.