One dot at a time
Kim Hopper, RFK Club & Mentor Director
& Brooke Miller, FHF
Brief Intro
Blue = Information on Power Point Slides
Pass out dot-to-dot puzzles
RABBIT
Sheet Color: Pink
Everyone complete the dot-to-dot and discuss the following questions
Whole Group Discussion
a. Who came up with the image of a rabbit? (SHOW COMPLETED
IMAGE)
b. Did the numbers help you complete the picture?
c. Did you trust the numbers to lead you to the pattern?
d. Did you need any help?
Vignette: A Camp Rabbit …
Andy came to camp with a smile. He bounced off the bus and into the arms of his
favorite camp counselor. He was always quick to share and eager to help. Andy
made friends easily, among both the campers and the staff. One year he got sick at
camp and had to go home a day early. His foster father came to pick him up and the
bond between them was obvious. He shared with Andy’s counselor that their family
would have adopted Andy long ago if he’d been available for adoption. While still a
child of the system, Andy was clearly loved and well cared for by active, attentive
foster parents who considered him a part of their forever family even without the
papers saying so. Andy was a rabbit.
A Camp/Club Rabbit = a child who has active, engaged, attentive parental
figures offering advice, encouragement and guidance (i.e., numbers guiding dotto-dot).
Recognizing a Camp/Club Rabbit:
 Often easy to connect to, trusting, able to talk through their feelings with a
good sense of self.
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Table talk
1. Think back to your childhood … who helped you connect
the dots as you grew up? Who helped you make life
choices?
2. Have you always known what dot to follow next? If not,
who did you ask for help?
3. Who are some of the people that get to “help with the dots”
in our Camper/Club Kid’s lives?
Goals in Loving the Camp/Club Rabbit
Every now and then we get Rabbits at Camp/Club. Our goal is to celebrate the
healthy connections and adults they have in their lives and be one more part of
reinforcing what healthy relationships look like.
FLOWER
Sheet Color: (missing numbers) Purple
Everyone complete the dot-to-dot and discuss the following questions
Whole Group Discussion
a.
b.
c.
d.
e.
Who came up with the image of a flower? (SHOW COMPLETED
IMAGE)
Even without all the numbers, were you able to complete the picture?
Did you ask for any help?
Did you look at anyone else’s paper?
Did you have to follow the numbers?
Vignette: A Camp Flower…
Hannah came to camp with a crayon-drawn picture. She nervously stepped down off
the bus, found her camp counselor, and delivered a picture of a rainbow that said
“Hi, I’m Hannah.” Her smile lit up when she found out that her counselor had also
drawn a picture for her, welcoming her to camp. Hannah was shy and quiet at first,
often telling her counselor how clumsy she was. She tried not to make any waves –
having one parent in jail and one in rehab had taught her to be as low maintenance
as possible. But throughout the week, her smile broadened and her confidence grew
as her Royal Family told her how creative she was, and how talented – in fact, she
ended up writing a play for the variety show, performed by her entire cabin. Hannah
was well-loved by each of her parents, but they themselves were trapped in things
that limited their parenting. Camp was an opportunity for her to have other adults
remind her just how special and how precious she was. Hannah was a flower.
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A Camp/Club flower = a child whose parents have been disrupted from
parenting, but who still has active role models engaging in their life, stepping
into some of the gaps.
Recognizing a Camp/Club Flower
 Often cautious but optimistic, needs encouragement but responds well once
it’s received.
Table talk
1. Think back to your childhood … did you have any
“missing numbers”? (i.e., alcoholic parent, latch key
kid, emotionally absent parent, etc…)
2. Who in your life stepped into those gaps?
Goals in Loving the Camp/Club Flower
Our goal is to stand in the gap along with other family members and caregivers as
one more healthy voice while parents seek help/get healthy. Mentoring is ideal for a
flower.
DUCK
Sheet Color (wrong numbers): Yellow
Everyone complete the dot-to-dot and discuss the following questions
a.
b.
c.
d.
e.
f.
What image did you come up with?
How did you feel in trying to complete this puzzle?
Did you look at anyone else’s paper?
Did anybody give up?
Did anybody ignore the numbers?
Did anyone get this image? [SHOW DUCK IMAGE]
Vignette: A Camp Duck
Gabe came to camp with his ball-cap tucked low over his eyes. His story brought
most camp counselors to their knees. Just weeks before, Gabe and his younger
brother had been abandoned in a hotel room. By their mother. They were alone for
several days, without food or water, before someone notified the authorities. Their
father was contacted – a man they didn’t know. Social Services was trying a
temporary placement with their father. And now they were at camp, meeting more
strangers and still without any answers about their mother. For Gabe, trust was
about as close as the moon. Gabe was a loner. Except when he was in a fight. He hid
when he was scared. Twice literally crawling underneath the camp bed, more often
hiding at the base of his sleeping bag. Gabe’s first year at camp ended much as it
began – eyes downcast, shoulders slumped. But he came back. And that next year, he
and his counselor formed a special bond, and slowly but surely Gabe started making
eye contact, and every so often, offered a smile. Gabe needed to learn to trust again –
he had been given a lot of “wrong numbers”. Gabe’s counselor signed up to be his
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mentor, and has taken an active interest in showing Gabe what a healthy father
figure looks like. God was using this relationship in the mentor’s life, too, as he was
unable to have children of his own but had a Father’s heart to share. Gabe’s story is
still rough, difficult, and full of unanswered questions, but he now knows he is loved
and loveable. Gabe was a duck.
A Camp/Club Duck = a child who has had poor examples, shown “wrong
numbers” and has a messy path as they try to navigate adult-topics with a
child’s heart and mind. Ready and even eager to follow patterns set by others.
This child may not have any healthy examples or role models, and may bear the
responsibility to help raise younger children. Mentoring is needed for a Duck,
but the relationship may be more challenging.
Recognizing a Camp Duck
 Untrusting. Doubtful. Have had to make do on their own before AND can
prove to you that they can do it again.
 Wrong numbers – these kids have had models who have shown them the
wrong way to go … sexually … relationally … cutting, etc…
Table talk
Take examples for sharing with whole room
1. What are some of the “wrong numbers” we see in kids at
Camp/Club? (i.e., sexuality at a young age, acting in a parent role)?
2. What are some of the challenges for us as staff when we encounter
that? (i.e., overly sexually charged child)?
3. What are some of the “healthy numbers” we can model for them at
Camp/Club? (i.e., healthy boundaries)?
4. What are some of the challenges for the kids experiencing Camp
for the first time (i.e.: a meal schedule, or a schedule at all)?
Goals in loving a Camp/Club Duck
*If their number 8 is “to cut”, sometimes we show them number 8 is “to hug”
Be a safe, steadfast example. Just be there.
Starfish
Sheet Color (no numbers): Turquoise
Everyone complete the dot-to-dot and discuss the following questions
a.
b.
c.
d.
e.
What image did you come up with?
How did you feel in trying to complete this puzzle?
Did you look at anyone else’s paper?
Did anybody give up?
Did anyone get this image? [SHOW STARFISH IMAGE)
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Vignette: A Camp Starfish
Amanda came to camp with a weapon. In addition to a sour attitude and cold heart,
a knife was always tucked into her pillow. Not to hurt others. To hurt herself.
Amanda had learned to cut in order to feel better, to feel safe. Her other form of selfprotection was others-abuse. Amanda would verbally and physically assault her
counselors, everything from cussing at them, spitting on them, biting them, pulling
their hair. Just about anything to prove that she was tougher and stronger than
anyone else, and didn’t need anyone. Amanda would never sing, scowled during
each bible story, and was more likely to push a child down than make a friend all
week. Amanda’s life outside of camp was unknown to us, but there’s only one way
for a child to show so much hurt and hatred, and that’s if it’s been modeled to them.
On her fifth and final year as a Camper, Amanda stepped off the bus … without a
weapon. She didn’t need it here, she said. After years of chasing her with love, she
had stopped running. She sang. Danced. Made friends. Amanda was a starfish.
A Camp/Club Starfish = a child without a compass, who is largely on their own, doesn’t
believe they are valuable or precious. This child needs a Mentor, however, the Mentor
needs to be steadfast and willing to go the long-haul with likelihood of NO feedback or
reciprocation from the child.
Recognizing a Camp Starfish
Their story is often off the grid, hard to follow, confusing to them and others. Often
experiencing severe and even erratic emotions. Hard and hard-hearted.
Table talk
Take examples for sharing with whole room
1. Think back to your childhood … how would it be to have no
numbers? Zero guidance?
2. What are some examples of kids you’ve seen at Camp/Club with no
guidance?
3. What are some tangible ways at Camp/Club we can help lead to THE
NEXT DOT?
Goals in loving a Camp/Club Starfish
Emphasis that it’s not our job to see their whole picture or figure it all out, God
knows it and sees it. We can pray for them, love them unconditionally and remain
faithful. Our consistency and love may just help get them one dot closer to their
true, original design.
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WRAP UP
Dots = Represents choices and life milestones
Numbers = Represents person who is guiding to the next dot
1. God has a design for EVERY SINGLE CHILD WE MEET
2. GOD’S IMAGE IS INSIDE THEM NO MATTER WHAT “IMAGE” THEY BRING
TO CAMP/CLUB
3. This is not about us creating a “pretty picture”, nor to say that every
child’s path is pre-set and we just have to help them “figure it out”
4. This IS to say that God has A plan, a design, for each child we interact
with
5. This is about having HELP to choose the right dots, not about
controlling which dot a child will choose
6. WE GET TO MEET THEM AT WHATEVER DOT THEY’RE ON, EVEN IF OFF
THE GRID, AND HELP SHOW THEM ONE STEP CLOSER TO GOD’S DESIGN
FOR THEIR LIVES
7. We have the PRIVILEGE of walking alongside the children as their
stories unfold and their images become clearer
8. WE DON’T SAVE THEM, WE SHOW THEM ANOTHER WAY
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