Getting Unburied from Treasures
Sponsored by the Cape Cod Hoarding Task Force and
The Barnstable County Department of Health and Environment
April 17th, 2013
Somewhere between “before” and “after,”
We find motivation for change.
Giving hope, fighting stigma: A panel of people dedicated to living a life less cluttered
present their side of the story
....It’s really not about the stuff.
By Lee Shuer
Director of Mutual Support at ServiceNet, Inc., collector, Buried in Treasures Workshop
Facilitator, and Unburied from Treasures Workshop co-facilitator
Popular television shows give the impression that “Hoarders” have all that junk because they are greedy,
lazy, incompetent, and out of touch with reality. The five of us who you will get to know today are here
to show you that we are not these things at all. Our panel of collectors is creative, intelligent, and
resourceful. We are Finders and Keepers who have been stuck; hung-up on something emotional,
unseen beneath the surface of life. What can be seen is only the tip of the stuff-berg. It’s complicated.
Our difficulty de-cluttering isn’t really about the stuff; it’s about what our possessions represent. Our
collections are disorganized piles of memories tied-up in overstock and stacked to the ceiling in plastic
bins.
We all save our stuff for different reasons, but we don’t necessarily have time to figure those reasons
out. Many of us are under pressure, by law or love, to clean-up. We’ve come to realize that it doesn’t
matter whether you collect lead or gold—too much of anything is a problem.
The reason that graduates of the Buried in Treasures Workshop and members of the Unburied from
Treasures group are here to speak to you today is not because I told them that there would be a good
lunch! Today’s event is the answer to the questions I heard repeatedly during our self-help groups;
“How can we fight stigma? How can we share what we’ve learned? How can we give hope?”
Stigma: We’re not “As seen on TV”
As mentioned above, people with this challenge have been given a lot of bad press in the last
few years. The plight of those facing eviction, divorce, and bankruptcy are the first people
asked to appear on shows like, “Hoarders.” Some people really are in this situation, but they
don’t have to be exploited for the state of their affairs. The sensational nature of primetime
television and is what makes it so popular.
People are rarely helped by the practices depicted on these shows. Unfortunately, what does
work is a long and tenuous process, and not very good for TV. Re-traumatizing people is way
more riveting to most audiences.
In order to give a different impression of what we’re like, our Unburied from Treasures Group
felt it would be helpful to list the positive qualities that we share among us:
We are people who want to be prepared, saving boxes for mailing/storing/moving.
We are collectors with a good eye for things we love and value.
We are incredibly resourceful, finding good clothes and food for little to no money.
We are generous and often collect things in case somebody else might need them sometime.
We are perfectionists who might avoid the anxiety of taking action rather than risk throwingout the wrong thing.
We are not wasteful.
We are creative, artistic, industrious, and inventive. We see art supplies everywhere! (You
gonna throw away that bottle cap? I have an idea…)
We are proficient at self-soothing by acquiring and/or keeping certain things that give a
momentary lift.
We are environmentally aware, finding new uses for old things, rather than sending them to
the landfill.
Whether or not you have a collecting problem, you probably share some of these qualities. The
difference between someone who builds a problematic amount of clutter and those who don’t,
is that they don’t necessarily act on these good intentions. One thing that we’ve learned from
our studies is that we are what we do, rather than what we have. That’s why we encourage
each other to actually use the art supplies we have before collecting more. Another example is
encouraging someone to give the wrapped birthday gift that was never given, because it might
not have been “just right.”
The people that we see on TV no doubt have many of these same qualities; they simply went
further into the cycle of collecting than most people. We are making it our mission to break the
cycle of acquiring and saving things that we don’t need. We are changing our priorities.
We are also changing the language that we use to describe ourselves and each other. The
newly-minted clinical term, “Hoarding Disorder,” now found in the DSM-V, is difficult for some
people to accept, or even to hear.
Synonyms for “Hoarder” found on-line are: saver, miser, collector, squirrel. Squirrel? Many of
us have chosen to use the term “collector,” instead. I use Finders and Keepers on occasion. But
the thing with language is this: what’s politically correct today will no doubt be incorrect
tomorrow.
That’s why I believe that until relationships transcend language, we will never truly understand
each other. That’s why we want you to get to know us today. You may leave with a whole new
vocabulary to describe this challenge and the people who live with it.
Education: A tool that we’ve found helpful
When acquiring or discarding, there are many skills to be learned in our self-help groups.* One
of these tools is the practice of asking ourselves questions about what we’re about to do. Some
of us carry a card with these questions on it, or post it on our refrigerator. Here are some
examples of questions we use to make good decisions:
Do I already have one?
Do I have a specific plan to use this?
Do I have room for it?
Is it something that I need, or just want?
Will this item make my life better?
And a real challenger….Will keeping/acquiring this item help me overcome my clutter problem?
The next time you reach for a magazine at a check-out counter, or find yourself buying a pair of
scissors because you can’t find yours, ask yourself these questions.
It’s also important to recognize that we all need stuff. This process allows us to reduce our
overall volume by keeping the most special, useful, and practical items.
Hope: Somewhere between “before” and “after,” we find motivation for change
Even those of us presenting today have had days when we felt hopeless, like we’d never live
without clutter. Many of you have probably encountered situations where you felt there was
no hope for the person that you’re trying to assist in this process.
The support that we’ve found in our groups has kept us going. We have learned to keep our
eyes on the prize, envisioning a future that better suits the life we want to live. We are finding
that by letting go of things from the past, we have more room and time to create new
memories. Instead of looking at pictures of places we went, we grab our cameras and head out
for new scenery. Instead of stuff, we collect experiences.
For many of us, this process is anxiety-producing, frustrating, and exhausting. So why do it?
Because we want to live a life less cluttered! Because we believe that it’s worth it, and because
we’re strong! We want the community to know that people do change their habits, and that
with hard work, education, and mutual support, we can overcome this challenge. So don’t give
up on those people who have nearly given-up on themselves! And if this is something that
you’re dealing with personally...please, don’t give up on yourself.
Thank you so much for coming here to witness our stories today, to network and meet people
who you might collaborate with professionally, and to understand this challenge from the
inside-out.
*The book that we use as the guide for our Buried in Treasures Workshop is, Buried in
Treasures: Help for Compulsive Acquiring, Saving, and Hoarding (Tolin, Frost, Steketee, Oxford
University Press, 2007.)
A free facilitator’s guide for this group written by Lee Shuer and Dr. Randy Frost can be found
online at: www.ocfoundation.org The website will be changing a bit, now that Hoarding
Disorder is no longer under the umbrella of OCD. Until then, please click on the “About OCD”
tab, scroll down to “Hoarding Center,” then click the “Help For Hoarding” tab, and scroll down
to Self Help and Support Groups. You will find a link to the latest version of the guide in this
section.
Happy reading, and hopeful living!
And now, without further ado, meet our panel!
Jessica
Jessica Star is an artist who uses many mediums to make her work. Her main love is
photography and she is currently embarking on a lifelong dream of becoming a
professional photographer. She shares a studio in downtown Greenfield where the main
focus is on photography, but there is space to work on other projects as well.
Star was raised making crafts and selling work at fairs. She holds a Bachelor of Fine Arts
from the San Francisco Art Institute.
One of the main reasons she has sought help for her collecting is that she uses many media
and makes many of her crafts from up-cycled supplies. For example, she makes scarves,
hats and handbags from felted sweaters. Star also has a line of jewelry that she makes from
vintage beads, taking apart old necklaces and creating a contemporary look with what had
been discarded by others. So, given the art & craft part of her life alone, she tends toward
collecting as she sees the possibility for creativity in so many objects.
The other main issue she faces is disorganization. It’s funny actually, as she has always
done administrative work and can create order in spaces that aren’t hers! She only found
out that she was dealing with the “gifts” of ADD in the past year. So, she can multi-task like
a mad woman (which the office loves) but has a hard time finishing projects that she’s
started.
Star has been aware of her overwhelming attachment to objects for many years. She has
been “researching” the root causes in her personal life, finding some interesting reasons for
the deep need to hold on to stuff. Having just realized she collects objects that she loves
and that bring her joy as a way to reflect back to herself who she is. That may not make
sense at a glance, but having realized this, she is working hard and letting go of “things”
with a grace that she has never known before. Her home is becoming a place she loves and
a place she seeks nurturance from, where in her past she always looked for it outside of her
own space.
Creating a home and studio that are well organized, loving, fun and sacred are at the top of
her list. By making the to do’s on the list small and doable, she is getting closer by the day
to letting go of the project of a lifetime, digging out from chaos, and finding herself.
Carol
I have been a member of Unburied from Treasure’s group for over a year now. When I
joined the group I was looking for support and ideas on how to deal with my abundant
collections of treasures which I had acquired over my lifetime. I never thought that my
collections of stuff were an issue until I had to move.
I had lived in my last place for over 27 years; my place was like a Townhouse. There was a
basement, a main floor, and a second floor with an attic space that ran the length of the
second floor. I realized even before I moved that I had way too much stuff. I found it
incredibly hard to let go of things. I thought my collections were what made me who I was
and if I threw them away I would be throwing myself away. I did throw things away--some
I wished I hadn’t, but my new residence was so much smaller; I had no choice.
At the time I was employed as children’s Librarian at an elementary school in Turner Falls.
I was overwhelmed and found it very hard to work on creating a home in my new
apartment that couldn’t hold all of my things. This began a downward spiral of depression.
There was a series of events; the move, family issues, and then a car accident that caused
the loss of my job. I was at such a low place in my life that I wanted to end it. As I struggled
to examine my life and look at where I had come to, I realized the possibility that changes
could really make a difference in my life.
That decision was made just about two years ago; I figured that I wouldn’t know if my life
could be different if I didn’t do things to make it different. I figured that I owed it to myself
to find out. So I quit smoking pot and cigarettes, I’ve done everything the doctor’s wanted
me to do for the constant migraines, I’ve been to PHP five times, I got active in the Recover
Project and the Recovery Learning Community, plus attended a lot of therapy and groups.
Being in the Unburied from Treasures group gives me a new understanding about my
collections. I have learned to look at them differently. It’s been a long haul for me but
slowly I have managed to make much needed progress. I had stopped doing even basic
things for myself, so to be able to say I did my dishes or washed my clothes and put them
away were the baby steps I took at first.
Very recently I had begun working on sorting a book collection one box at a time. I then
found out that I had to have surgery and needed to push myself a bit more in order to be
able to get around my apartment on crutches. This push would not have been possible if I
had not had the support of the Treasures group members. They have drawn-out hope and
strength that I did not know I had in me. I came to see that I could do what was needed to
be done. Moving forward is the goal and I am on my way.
Lil
Lil once lived what she refers to as a, “Normal life.” In the middle 1980’s, she began to be
aware that she was no longer doing the things she had been accustomed to doing. She was
not putting things away. She was accumulating more than she needed.
Lil was keeping things where she could see them. By the middle of the 1990’s, she realized
that she had a problem. Looking back, she’s tried to figure-out how her life had changed.
She realized that her clients (she was a therapist in Los Angeles, CA) started dying from
AIDS, and she could not save them. The sense of loss was horrendous.
She also believes there may be a genetic tendency. Her dad, who died at 97, had the same
problem in his later years.
Lil attended a workshop in Long Beach, California for pack rats. There was a reporter for
the London Times who asked for a volunteer whose home he could film for the publication.
No one else volunteered, therefore, she did. When the reporter arrived, he felt my home
was not bad enough. I am sure if he came today he would be able to use my home.
Lil remains committed to working on reducing the number of possessions in her home, and
rarely misses an Unburied from Treasures meeting. She is a valued and inspiring member
of the group.
Karen
Karen Lowe is a Certified Peer Specialist, a singer/songwriter, and a visual artist. She has
had a problem with letting go of things, and acquiring even more things, for most of her life.
She has had difficulty with keeping her home clean as a result. About two and a half years
ago, Karen decided to ask for help by attending a Clutterers Anonymous meeting in
Springfield. It was a great experience to be supported by other people who had the same
challenges as she did. She started a Clutterers Anonymous meeting in Greenfield that
folded soon after it started due to lack of attendance.
Soon after that, Karen heard that her supervisor at ServiceNet, Lee Shuer, was going to be
facilitating a group using Buried in Treasures, a ground-breaking book for hoarders and
their allies. Karen took the assessment pre-test and got into the group that was held in
Greenfield.
During participation in this group, Karen had a breakthrough; she decided that she wanted
to make room in her life and her home for herself and other people. Since attending the
Buried in Treasures group, Karen has continued to make steady progress with cleaning and
organizing her apartment. Now, she feels comfortable in her own home.
Now Karen is honored to co-facilitate the Unburied from Treasures support group, which is
comprised of mostly Buried in Treasures graduates, in Greenfield. She continues to learn
from the group members how to improve her life.
Lee
Lee Shuer has been certified as a Peer Specialist in AZ and MA, and is a certified WRAP
facilitator. He is the author of The Mutual Support Workbook, a training guide for mental
health workers. He partnered with Dr. Randy Frost to create The Facilitator’s Manual for
the Buried in Treasures Workshop, which has been used to start self-help groups for
clutterers from California to Australia. In 2010 he received citations from The
Massachusetts State Senate and House of Representatives for his successful development of
meaningful employment opportunities for people living with mental health challenges.
Since 2000, Mr. Shuer, who has learned to live successfully with his own mental health
challenges, has worked to bridge the gap between clinical and peer supports, while
harnessing the best practices of both. He has shared this vision with ABCnews.com,
NBCnews.com, The San Francisco Chronicle, Scientific American, Canadian Public Radio,
The Seoul Broadcasting Station, and at numerous conferences and trainings across the
country.
His vision is of a mental health system where staff members are encouraged to draw from
their own unique life experiences to inform the work they do, and where a spirit of
humanity and humility pave the way to independence for those who thought they would
never be freed from stigma and statistics. With his violin in hand and his wife Rebecca and
family at his side, he moves closer each day to making his dream of equality a reality.