Choosing
the
Best Life
lesson one
Choosing the Best Life
For the next 8 lessons we will
be studying
Choosing the Best Life ,
a course to help teens make
the best choices about sexual
behavior.
750,000 teens get pregnant
each year
25% of sexually active Grads
have a STD
lesson one
Choosing the Best Life
“Sex, Emotions and self-respect”
1. The first lesson deals with sex,
emotions and self-respect
2. Turn to page 6
3. We will discuss the questions on page
6 after watching Video Segment One:
“Males vs. Females”
<6>
lesson one
lesson one
Choosing the Best Life
DVD
Video Segment 1
“Guys vs. Girls”
“Males vs. Females”
lesson one
1. How do guys and girls view sex
differently?
Guys: sex is physical, driven by
hormones & peer pressure
Girls: sex is an emotional
experience, involving strong
feelings
<6>
lesson one
lesson one
“Males vs. Females”
2.
Guys: What would you like
girls to know to better
understand about guys?
<6>
lesson one
Choosing the Best Life
“Males vs. Females”
3.
lesson one
Girls What would you like
guys to know to better
understand about girls?
<6>
lesson one
> Guys & Girls Can
View Sex Differently
Guys
1. Does not = personal relationship
Guys
2. Expect
Girls
sex to happen sooner
3. Love & Commitment
Guys
4. Not Serious
Guys
5. Turned on/Curious/impress friends
Girls
6. Partner pressure
Girls
7. Less pleasure and satisfaction
<7>
lesson one
Guys & Girls are different
3 Ways Sex is Misused to Meet
Emotional Needs
1. Acceptance
2. Man
3. Valued
Why?
Disappointment
<7>
Guys & Girls are different
Guys
View Sex
Sex
Hormones
Stimulation
BRAIN
ACTIVITY
Guys can focus more
easily on the physical
side of sex w/out
relationship
How does
testosterone
affect guys?
Sight? Guys can
just see something
sexual and be
aroused.
Girls
Girls tend to have
a broader view of
sex, emphasizing
the total
relationship
How are girls
affected by
estrogen?
Words,
personality,
touch? Girls are
stimulated by
the whole event.
1 side @ a time Both sides together
<7 supplemental >
lesson one
Guys & Girls Can View Sex
BRAIN ACTIVITY
What does each side of the brain do?
LEFT PORTION
the Logical Side
Deals with
concrete
thinking and
reasoning
RIGHT PORTION
the creative side
Deals with feelings and
emotions
<7 supplemental >
lesson one
Six Emotional Effects of
Premarital Sexual Involvement
1. Worry
Why?
Effect?
2. Regret & Guilt
Personal
3.Impairs
Development
4.
5.
Fear of Future
Relationships
Lowers
Self-esteem
6. Depression
<8>
lesson one
Six Emotional Effects of
Premarital Sexual Involvement
1. Worry
Why?
Effect?
Fear:
1.
2.
3.
4.
1. pregnancy
2. getting an STD or
AIDS
3. parents finding out
<8>
Nervousness
loss of sleep
poor grades
possible long-term
health problems
lesson one
Six Emotional Effects of
Premarital Sexual Involvement
Why?
Effect?
2. Regret & Guilt
1. Relating sex to love and
feeling loss when
relationship ends
2. Regret about not
reaching personal goals
3. Guilt about going
against personal values
4. Being disappointed in
self’ regret about
hurting others
<8>
1. Medical problems
such as ulcers
2. Eating disorders
lesson one
Six Emotional Effects of
Premarital Sexual Involvement
Why?
Effect?
Personal
3. Impairs
Development
1. Can use sex to escape
pressures or to avoid
2. Learning how to
communicate in a
healthy way with
opposite sex
<8>
1. May turn inward
2. Fail to develop
healthy interests and
relationships
3. Fail to develop a
personal, independent
identity
4. Experience feelings
of betrayal that can
lead to rage
lesson one
Six Emotional Effects of
Premarital Sexual Involvement
Why?
4.
Effect?
Fear of Future
Relationships
1. Fear of being used or
betrayed again
2. Have not learned
healthy communication
3. Jealousy
<8>
1. Difficulty
trusting
Inability to make
a commitment to
someone
2. Withdrawal from
close
relationships
3. pattern of use
and abuse in
relationships
lesson one
Six Emotional Effects of
Premarital Sexual Involvement
5.
Why?
Effect?
Lowers
Self-esteem
1. May feel dehumanized
or worthless
2. Weak or powerless if
partner is selfish or
controlling
<8>
1. May feel used or
damaged,
unhappy or
lacking dignity
2. May have sex
again to feel
control
3. May seek
attention or turn
to destructive
behavior
lesson one
Six Emotional Effects of
Premarital Sexual Involvement
Why?
Effect?
6. Depression
1. Feels like a failure
2. Feels deeper pain
because already sees
events in an emotional
way
<8>
1. May lead to
attempted or
successful
suicide
2. Girls sexually
active = 6x
more likely to
attempt suicide
than virgins
Boys= 8x
lesson one
Character Application
SEX & Self-Respect
Heart Activity
What parts of the story did you respond
to by tearing large parts of your heart?
Are there any differences in the piles of
torn pieces on the boys’ vs girls’ desks?
<9>
SEX & Self-Respect
Character Application
Heart Activity
1. Is it possible for Kendra to restore
her life?
2. If Kendra respected herself, would
she have given herself to Antonio
without his commitment to her?
3. What is this commitment called?
4. Waiting for sex is called?
5. Consequences of abstinence?
<9>
SEX & Self-Respect
Character Application
Character is who you are on the inside.
It’s how you act and think when no one
else is around. One part of healthy
character development is self-respect.
Respect for yourself begins with the idea
that you are valuable and worthy. We’ve
seen how sexual relationships before
marriage often lower self-respect in
both people. The emotional pain can cause
a downward spiral of feelings.
Personal Application:
<10>
SEX & Self-Respect
Character Application
Discussion Questions: PAGE 10
Answer all questions on this page
Personal Application:
<10>
Sex,
lesson two
alcohol
and
respect
View video and then we will discuss:
“sex and alcohol don’t mix”
Take notes on page 12
Choosing the Best Life
<11>
Choosing the Best Life
DVD
Video Segment 2
“Sex and Alcohol Don’t Mix”
lesson two
“Sex and Alcohol Don’t Mix”
1. What effect does alcohol have
on a young person?
A.
B.
C.
D.
Increased risk of sexual activity
Date rape
Contracting STDs
Pregnancy
<12>
lesson two
“Sex and Alcohol Don’t Mix”
2. Why do you think some teens
drink alcohol?
1. Peer pressure
2. Like the calming feeling
3. Feel less inhibited and less
anxious
<12>
lesson two
“Sex and Alcohol Don’t Mix”
3. What are some of the risks of “hooking
up” under the influence of alcohol?
1. Become less inhibited
2. Become less assertive in
maintaining boundaries
3. Can lose consciousness
4. Can be unaware of partner’s
actions
<12>
lesson two
“Sex and Alcohol Don’t Mix”
Did she get pregnant?
Did either of them contract an STD?
What were the consequences for
them?
Activity: One Guy and One Girl
<12>
lesson two
What do you know about
“Date Rape?
True 1.
True 2.
True 3.
False 4.
False 5.
True 6.
True 7.
False 8.
True
True
Force
Shame
Guilt
Sadness
Guy – school suspension
Girl – felt loss of respect
Drugs
Date Rape
9. Rape
10. Alone
<13>
lesson two
SEX & Self-Respect
Character Application
Read the first paragraph on page 16 and then Sarah’s Story
DATE RAPE:
1. Rape occurs when one person forces another to
have sexual relations
2. Incidence of rape in U.S. peaks among women age
16-19. 700,000 rapes per year, 61% under age 18.
3. 84% of those who reported unwanted sexual
intercourse knew their assailant.
4. Rape victims should seek immediate medical
attention and contact a rape crisis center/hotline.
5. The victim is NEVER to blame for rape.
6. Rape is not about sex, but about control.
<13>
lesson two
SEX & Self-Respect
Character Application
7. Date rape drugs can facilitate sexual assault by causing
sedation and amnesia to the point that the victim cannot or
may not resist or remember. Mixing drugs and alcohol is
dangerous and potentially fatal.
8. Date rape drugs are easy to hide – colorless and odorless, but
somewhat salty tasting. Can be hidden in a drink. Never
leave your drink unattended!
9. Rape is a CRIME and punishable by IMPRISONMENT.
10. Never be alone with anyone who makes you feel
uncomfortable or fails to show you respect.
<13>
lesson two
> How Alcohol effects a young Person
1. Brain
2. Memory
3. Death
4. Inhibitions
5. Unconsciousness
6. Sex
7. Five
8. Alcohol
9. 50 to 75 percent
10.unplanned
<14>
lesson two
The Physical Effects of Alcohol Abuse
Activity: Bat
Brain: learning
Mental: coordination
Heart: Attack
Digestive Tract: cancer
Immune System:infections
Stomach: ulcers
Liver:cancer
Reproductive
System: Impotence, irregular
<15>
lesson two
SEX & Self-Respect
Character Application
Read and listen to the story on page16
Then answer the discussion questions.
Personal Application:
<16>
Sex,
lesson three
STDs and
honesty
STDs are unique because they are
contracted through at risk sexual
behaviors.
Watch the video and make notes.
Choosing the Best Life
<17>
Choosing the Best Life
DVD
Video Segment 3
“A Visit to a Microbiology Lab”
lesson three
“A Visit to a Microbiology Lab”
1.
How can you tell if a person has an STD?
You can’t!
2. Why are most teens not concerned about
contracting an STD?
They think they’re invincible.
3. Most common STDs?
Chlamydia
Gonorrhea
Syphilis
Human papillomavirus (HPV)
Genital herpes
<18>
“Chlamydia”
Read introductory paragraphs
Slide 1 and 2
The Silent Disease
1. Bacterial,1.5 million
2. no
3. oral
4. Cured
5. PID; infertility
6. 3 to 10
<19>
lesson three
“Gonorrhea”
Read introductory paragraph
Slide 3 and 4
One of the Oldest STDs
1. 650,000
2. no
3. Oral
4. PID
5. 50
6. HIV
<20>
lesson three
“Syphilis”
Read introductory paragraph
Slide 5-8
1. bacterial
2. direct
3. oral
4. sore
5. cured
6. death
<21>
lesson three
“Trichomoniasis”
1. parasite
2. no
3. cured
<21>
lesson three
“Human Papilloma Virus (HPV)” lesson three
Read introductory paragraph
Slide 9-10
The Most Common Viral STD
1. Viral; 50%;43%
2. Genital; cancer
3. No; life
4. HPV; die
5. Pap
6. oral
<22>
“Genital Herpes”
lesson three
Read introductory paragraph
Slide 11-13
More Than 45 Million Infected
1. Viral; 45
2. 90%
3. life
4. Blisters
5. Skin to skin
6. Visual; not
<23>
STDs Are Wide Spread
1. 25
2. 15.3 million; 65 million
3. 4 million; 10,959 daily; 457
hourly; 8 seconds
4. No; multiple; cervix
<24>
lesson three
Here’s How they Spread
ACTIVITY
1. 3
2. 6
3. 1
4. 8
5. 3
6. 2
<24>
lesson three
What about ”safe Sex”
1. Condom
2. Every
3. Correctly
4. Not
5. Half
How well do condoms work for birth control?
1. Break;
2. 15%
Reduce STD risk ?
1. 85%; 15%
2. Fluids; 50%
3. Skin to skin
4. HPV
5. No
Abstinence
<25>
What about ”safe Sex”
lesson three
Is ‘Safe sex really safe?
What is the only way to
ELIMINATE the risk of
pregnancy or of contracting an
STD?
<25>
What about ”safe Sex”
lesson three
What does abstinence involve?
Making an informed decision to
not participate in risk-taking
behaviors that can lead to
pregnancy or an STD
<25>
What about ”safe Sex”
lesson three
What are at-risk behaviors?
•
•
•
•
Vaginal sex
Anal sex
Oral sex
Mutual masturbation
which can pass infected body fluids
through skin-to-skin contact
<25>
Character Application
lesson three
Sex and Honesty
Read two paragraphs on
page 26
And answer the 2
questions
Personal Application: Answer
<26>
Sex,
lesson four
pregnancy and
responsibility
Video “Nicole and Raoul”
Turn to page 28. read these as we start
the video.
Watch the video and make notes.
Choosing the Best Life
<28>
Choosing the Best Life
DVD
Video Segment 4
“Nicole and Raoul”
lesson four
“Sex and Alcohol Don’t Mix”
1. How did getting pregnant
affect Nicole’s life?
A. Scared during pregnancy
B. Thought he would help
C. Teenage years of freedom gone
<28>
lesson four
“Nicole and Raoul”
2. How did getting pregnant
affect Raoul’s life?
A. Hard to get a job & make $
B. Relationship changed
C. Did not know the amount of
attention a baby needed.
<
28 >
lesson four
“Nicole and Raoul”
3. What happen to their
relationship after the baby?
A. Less time together
B. Strain
C. Could not do things together the
way they once did.
<
28 >
lesson four
Teen pregnancy is a significant problem.
A. highest
B. 750,000; 10; 19
C. 20
<29>
lesson four
Who Suffers the Consequences?.
A.
B.
C.
D.
1/3
health
poverty
low
<29>
lesson four
Reducing the Risk of Teen Pregnancy
Read Chart page 30
Activity: 7 volunteers
Activity: Cards
<30>
lesson four
Consequences of Choices
Teen Parenting
Adoption
Physical
Medical
Complications
later regret
Sadness,
Emotional
Social
Abortion
guilt shame
sadness
Regret
Parenting
income
responsibility
<31>
lesson four
Sex and Responsibility
1.
Read paragraph
1.
<32>
Answer discussion
questions
Sex,
lesson five
HIV/AIDS and
compassion
Turn to page 34.
Read the question before we start video
Watch the video and make notes.
Choosing the Best Life
<33>
Choosing the Best Life
DVD
Video Segment 5
“A Life-Changing Visit to an AIDS Clinic ”
“A life-Changing Visit
to an AIDS Clinic”
lesson five
1. What did you learn from Lisa?
Just hold off?
infected while engaged, almost
died many times, medicine not a
cure, she will eventually die
<34>
“A life-Changing Visit
to an AIDS Clinic”
2. What did you learn from
Dottie?
lesson five
acquired the disease at 16 from a
boy she hardly knew and several
years later developed AIDS
Incubation ? As long as 10 years as
short as months
Fastest grow under 24
<34>
“A life-Changing Visit
to an AIDS Clinic”
lesson five
3. Do teen need to be concerned
about contracting HIV/AIDS?
YES
<34>
What Happens If
You contract HIV?
stage
1
Effect
Sexual
Initial
Infection
<35>
lesson five
What Happens If
You contract HIV?
stage
2
Effect
not
Initial
Symptoms
<35>
lesson five
What Happens If
You contract HIV?
stage
3
Effect
many
Asymptomatic
Stage
<35>
lesson five
What Happens If
You contract HIV?
stage
4
Effect
immune
Early AIDS
Symptoms
<36>
lesson five
What Happens If
You contract HIV?
stage
AIDS
5
Effect
Opportunity
<36>
lesson five
What Happens If
You contract HIV?
stage
6
Effect
NO
Treatment
<36>
lesson five
lesson five
Activity: Cups
<36>
lesson five
Ten Common Myths About HIV/AIDS
1. NO. Medication can prolong life but with
severe side affects
2. Does not always know
3. Cannot tell by how a person looks
4. You can become infected from only one
sexual encounter
5. Can from oral sex
6. Do not live health normal lives
7. not spread by casual contact
8. Affects BOTH…25% under 22
9. Cannot
10. Practice Abstinence
<37>
lesson five
Compassion
READ page 38 and answer
questions
<38>
Sex,
lesson six
love and
choices
Turn to page 40.
Read the question before we start video
Watch the video and make notes.
Choosing the Best Life
<39>
Choosing the Best Life
DVD
Video Segment 6
“Choosing Abstinence”
Choosing Abstinence
lesson six
1. Why are these teens choosing
abstinence?
to be in control of their own lives
to set priorities
to stay focused on future goals
because its not safe
<40>
Choosing Abstinence
lesson six
2. Why become ”secondary virgins”?
Wasn’t worth it,
Emotional consequences,
Physical consequences,
Focus education and personal goals
<40>
Choosing Abstinence
lesson six
3. How does abstinence help a relationship develop?
Show respect
Focus on inner qualities not just physical
Better see compatibility and character
issues
<40>
lesson six
Decisions about Sex
Activity: Groups of 4-5
Page 41 Brainstorm
Each team work together and fill in
both list. (in all work books)
<41>
Choosing the Best Life
lesson six
A. not
vaginal sex, anal sex, oral sex , mutual masturbation
and intimate skin-to-skin contact
B. FROM:
Abstinence Provides Freedom
fear of pregnancy, HIV, STDs, worry,
guilt, depression
To:
Pursue life goals, be free from worry or
guilt, establish, a marriage built on trust,
enjoy life as a teen
<42>
Choosing the Best Life
C. Renewed Virginity
1.
Renewed
2. People
3. share
4. accountable
<42>
lesson six
lesson six
Infatuation or Love relationship
Focus
Feelings
Infatuation
1.
2.
Time together 3.
Tested
4.
Commitment 5.
I
very
short
problems
my
<43>
Love
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
other
levels
long
through
other
lesson six
Abstinence Helps Relationships Develop
READ STORY of TOM and KRISTINE
1. Intense with strong emotions
NO.
2. Physical focus and keep them from
getting to know one another
3. Help them BUILD the relationship
over time
<43>
lesson six
Infatuation or Love relationship
Infatuation
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
Emotional
Untested
feelings
Hormone
Weakens
Self
Jealous
Love
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
<42>
Commitment
Tested
Level out
Knowledge
Strengthens
Caring
Open
Sex,
lesson seven
limits and
self-discipline
Turn to page 46.
Read the question before we start video
Watch the video and make notes.
Choosing the Best Life
<45>
Choosing the Best Life
DVD
Video Segment 7
“Dealing with Pressure”
lesson four
“Sex and Alcohol Don’t Mix”
1. How did getting pregnant
affect Nicole’s life?
A. Scared during pregnancy
B. Thought he would help
C. Teenage years of freedom gone
<28>
Sex,
lesson eight
saying “no” and
courage
Video “ Taking a Stand”
Turn to page 52. read these as we start
the video.
Watch the video and make notes.
Choosing the Best Life
<51>
Choosing the Best Life
DVD
Video Segment 8
“Taking a Stand”
lesson four
“Sex and Alcohol Don’t Mix”
1. How did getting pregnant
affect Nicole’s life?
A. Scared during pregnancy
B. Thought he would help
C. Teenage years of freedom gone
<28>
lesson two
“Sex and Alcohol Don’t Mix”
Tape activity Unused a lot of Bonding Power.
1. Is this first relationship likely to last?
2. What happened to the bonding tape each time it
was used?
3. What happens to two pieces of tape (two people in a
relationship) that have never been used when they
bond for the first time?
Ten Stages of Bonding
<12 supplemental >
lesson two
“Sex and Alcohol Don’t Mix”
Tape activity Unused a lot of Bonding Power.
1. Is this first relationship likely to last?
2. What happened to the bonding tape each time it
was used?
3. What happens to two pieces of tape (two people in a
relationship) that have never been used when they
bond for the first time?
Ten Stages of Bonding
<12 supplemental >
lesson two
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
Stages of Emotional Bonding
Eye to Body contact
Voice to voice
Eye to eye
Hand to hand
Kiss- affection
Kiss- Passion
Hand to Head
Hand to breast contact
9. Hand to genital contact
10. Intercourse
<12 supplemental >