Parable of Isms
A look at the 1930’s era & beyond with
Cows
Or
I herd the moosic
Socialism
• If you have two cows you
give one to your neighbor.
Communism
• You give both cows to the
government which gives
you back some of the milk.
Fasicsm
• You keep the cows but give
the milk to the
government, which sells
you some of it back.
New Dealism
• You shoot one cow, milk
the other and then pour
the milk down the sink.
NAZISM
•The government
shoots you and sells
the cows
Capitalism
•If you have two
cows, you sell one
and buy a bull
IMPERIALISM
•If you have two cows,
you steal somebody’s
bull.
IDEALISM
• If you have two cows, you
milk them both, use all the
milk you need and have
enough left for everyone
else
REALISM
•If you have two cows,
then they’re both dry
Modern Socialism
• You have 2 cows. The
State nationalizes one
and gives it to your
neighbor.
PROTECTIONISM
• You have two cows. You
can't buy a bull from
another country
ANARCHISM
• You have two cows. Your
neighbor hits you over the
head with a brick, steals your
cows, then shoots them for
fun.
Militarism
• You have two cows, but your
neighbor has 3. You get 5
more and allow them to knock
down his fence and eat in his
field.
Totalitarianism
• You have two cows. The
government takes them
and denies they ever
existed. Milk is banned
American Capitalism
• You have two cows. The government
taxes you to the point you have to
sell both to support a man in a
foreign country who has only one
cow, which was a gift from your
government.
Surrealism
•You have two giraffes.
You are required to
take harmonica
lessons.
Swiss Capitalism
• You have 5000 cows. None
of them belong to you. You
charge owners for storing
them.
POLITICAL CORRECTNESSISM
• You are associated with two
differently aged (but no less
valuable to society) bovines of
non specified gender. You don't
milk them as you are not sure it
would be appropriate.
Sources
• http://www.barrypopik.com/index.php/new_york_city/entry/you_
have_two_cows/
• http://trustinggodntx.blogspot.com/2009/08/parable-of-isms.html
• http://getliquid.com/news/2011/7/25/economics-101-you-havetwo-cows.html
• http://www.google.com/imgres?q=picture+two+cows&hl=en&safe
=strict&sa=X&rls=com.microsoft:enus&biw=1024&bih=712&tbm=isch&tbnid=YrppNvtOf_M3M:&imgrefurl=http://realwealthanswers.com/2011/05/19/c
ows-andgovernment/&docid=fXHGpqnetROmGM&imgurl=http://realwealth
answers.com/files/2011/05/cows.jpg&w=779&h=449&ei=pLdRUZb
3BYfsiQLLg4GADQ&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=2&vpy=176&dur=1156&
hovh=170&hovw=296&tx=150&ty=100&page=1&tbnh=139&tbnw=
233&start=0&ndsp=20&ved=1t:429,r:15,s:0,i:129