Men Against Violence
A Service by Saheli in Greater Boston & New England
SUPPORT AND FRIENDSHIP FOR SOUTH ASIAN FAMILIES
Saheli 2014
Who is Saheli?
• Non-profit providing help to survivors of domestic
violence
• 17 years of service to South Asian families
• Services:
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Survivor Aid - Domestic Violence & Violence Against Women
Physical and Mental Health
Economic Empowerment Program
Men Against Violence Initiative
Vision and Mission
Our Vision
To create an abuse-free environment
for South Asians
Our Mission
To empower South Asian women and their families to
lead healthy and safe lives in the United States
Domestic Violence is Not Just a Woman’s Issue
• Women advocates have worked alone against domestic
abuse and violence for a very long time.
• We are not winning the war against domestic violence
• The time has come to engage men and youth in this
struggle
Is this abuse a new social problem?
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Domestic violence has been a social issue throughout history.
Largely been ignored in laws and politics up until recent decades.
Reasons
– Has a lot to do with women having been regarded as subservient to men.
– In subservience, abuse and violence were seen as being an acceptable way to
control the family.
Today roles for men and women are being looked at through the lens of respect and
equality rather than dominance.
Laws have been created to provide safety and to work towards encouraging
relationships that are free of abuse and violence.
Today we understand domestic violence affects the entire family, even the children.
Increasingly, everyone is very concerned about the impact of domestic violence on
children.
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What are the statistics?
• More than two million* injuries every year from intimate partner
violence
• Approximately 15.5 million children in the U.S. exposed to domestic
violence in their homes last year**
• On average, more than three women a day are murdered by their
husbands or boyfriends in the United States***
Perhaps, you may think this doesn’t happen to my friends or me?
None of us are immune to such violence in our society, including you, your
family and friends…….
*Source: CDC
**Source: McDonald, R., Jouriles, E. N., & Ramisetty-Mikler, S., et al.
*** U.S. Department of Justice, Bureau of Justice Statistics
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Statistics for South Asians in Greater Boston
• 40.8% - Women physically and/or sexually abused by male partners in
their lifetime
• 65% of these reported physical abuse AND sexual abuse. 30.4% of those
reported injuries, some requiring medical attention.
• 15.8% reported injury or the need of medical services as a result of a
partner’s violence.
• No significant difference was found in the prevalence of domestic violence
between arranged marriages and non-arranged marriages.
• Only 11% of South Asian women received counseling services for abuse.
• Only 3.1% of the abused South Asian women obtained a restraining order
against an abusive partner. Women in MA, over 33% of women obtained a
restraining order (the past 5 years)
• Such victims are more likely to experience “poor physical health” (19.5%
vs. 6.7%), “depression (31.8% vs. 10.2%), “anxiety” [in 7 or more of the last
30 days], and “suicidal ideation (15.9% vs. 2.5%) [during the last year]
Source: Raj A, Silverman J. Intimate partner violence against South-Asian women in Greater Boston. Journal of
American Medical Women’s Association. 2002; 57(2).
Children who grow up in abusive situations
exhibit these behaviors*
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Physical Complaints - headaches, stomach aches, bed wetting or ulcers
Eating Problems - Increased or Decreased appetite
Trouble Sleeping - being tired all the time
Physical Injuries
Hair Pulling, nail biting
Temper Tantrums
Nightmares
School Phobias - Impaired Concentration
Fear of Men- and/or their voices
Fear of Being Touched - flinching when someone reaches toward them
* Source: www.sablehouse.org
Why Should You Be Involved?
Examples of abuse continue – The 2012 brutal rape and death in New Delhi to
punish a young woman for stepping out at night in the company of a man; a
2011 Saheli volunteer losing her life to a violent domestic dispute related to
the control of family finances; in 1997, a Brookline MA a physician, her 13year old child and her father were killed by her unemployed spouse in an
angry domestic dispute.
This serious social problem needs the voices of men:
• To recognize and acknowledge this problem
• To volunteer and speak out against domestic violence
• To help Saheli right here in New England with time and money
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We can use your help
For an American community mostly regarded as well
educated, employed, having strong family ties and
roots going back to countries in Asia there have been
many shocking deaths associated with domestic
violence
“From birth through motherhood, too many South Asian women
and girls suffer from a life where being female deprives them of
the most basic resources. This inequity is often enforced and
maintained by violence—making them more likely to become ill
and to die.*”
*Jay Silverman, Harvard School of Public Health
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What Can You Do?
You can solicit newspapers to do an
editorial series on violence against
women
Host an Annual Event (Breakfast or
Lunch) to help men raise awareness
about violence against women and
recruit other men to participate
Call on the local school board to host
one assembly on the role of men and
boys in stopping violence against girls
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What More Can You Do?
• You can advocate for all local middle school and high school
sports coaches to attend training on violence against girls and
boys.
• You can contact your local town services and suggest what
they can do
• You can get your faith group to develop a local activity
promoting healthy manhood.
• You can obtain and distribute information on the services of
organizations like Saheli.
• You can commit to providing information to at least one
professional or community organization that you belong to.
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First Actions for a South Asian Man TODAY with
Saheli
• Join as allies to support the work that women are
already doing.
• Sign our “Men Against Violence Pledge” today and
personally commit to domestic violence prevention
• Sign up to share your talents, gifts, and resources to
domestic violence prevention programs in your own
communities with Saheli Boston’s help.
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Want to know more?
Contact: Saheli, Support and Friendship for South Asian
Women:
P. O. Box 1345, Burlington, MA 01803
• Visit us on the web: www.saheliboston.org;
• Facebook saheliboston;
• Join Saheli’s Program called Men’s Program Against
Violence by writing to sahelihelp@gmail.com.
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