Chapter 7 “Building
Effective Interpersonal
Relationships”
1
Section 2
“Personal Style in
Interpersonal
Relationships”
2
Dominant
3
Dominant


1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
15 % of population
Behaviors
Fast paced/task oriented
Considered “mover/shaker” – gets things done
Will do whatever is necessary to overcome
obstacles
Skilled at providing direction to others
Sought as leaders
Will delegate to those deemed competent
4
Dominant

1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
Speaks
Direct and to the point
Can be blunt and critical
Can be sarcastic
Gives instruction for big picture but omits
details to be accomplished before project
can begin
Inspires others but may be overly
optimistic
5
Dominant
Speaks
6. Doesn’t hide accomplishments and may be
self-centered
7. Will escalate conflict
8. Can be manipulative to get results
9. Will close off communication when highly
stressed
10. Sometimes needs to be confronted to get
attention
11. You may have to push back to get respect

6
Dominant

1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
Listens
Not patient; seldom seeks opinions
Wants brief answers
Wants bottom line first – reasons second
Asks if they want more detail
Is more interested in task information
than people issues
7
Dominant

1.
2.
3.
4.
How to speak to dominates
Provide brief, direct, to-the-point answers
Ask “what” not “how” questions
Stick to business; outline possibilities to
get results, solve problems or be in
charge
Stress logic of ideas or approaches
8
Dominant

5.
6.
7.
How to talk to dominate
Agree with facts or ideas, not person
Provide facts, figures about probability of
success or effectiveness of options
Show how they will reach goals
9
Influencing
10
Influencing
15% of population
 Behaviors
1. Fast paced/people oriented
2. Has an interactor style
3. Tends to be extroverted, enthusiastic,
outgoing, spontaneous and optimistic
4. Appear stylish
11
Influencing

5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
Behaviors
Likes stimulating conversation
Has difficulty with routine tasks
Gets results by influencing and
persuading
Valued and sought for fun-loving attitude
Enjoys recognition of achievements
12
Influencing

1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
Speaks
Friendly; initiates conversation
Spontaneous and often humorous
Makes positive, enthusiastic remarks
Physically expressive with face, tone and
gestures
Often promises more than can be
delivered
13
Influencing

6.
7.
8.
9.
10.
Speaks
Uses excuses
Influences and persuades through verbal
praise
Makes judgments intuitively instead of
analyzing data
Physical communicator – shakes hands,
hugs, pats shoulders
Need to verbally express at length
14
Influencing

1.
2.
3.
4.
Listens
Responsive
Encouraging V and NV
Interrupts to compare experiences, not
dominate
Very empathic due to high degree of
emotionality
15
Influencing

5.
6.
7.
Listens
Hears only what he wants
May not hear negatives
Reacts too quickly to speaker’s first
words
16
Influencing

1.
2.
3.
4.
How to speak to an influencing
Be a good listener
Provide chances for verbalizing about
ideas, people or intuitions
Speak in democratic terms – “we” not
“I’m the boss; do as I say”
Give big picture without getting bogged
down with detail- put details in writing
17
Influencing
How to speak to influencing
Provide testimonials
Provide extra incentives – likes to be
recognized as a leader
Lead step-by-step to conclusions – tend
to jump and not be analytical
Use small talk before getting down to
business

5.
6.
7.
8.
18
Influencing

9.
10.
11.
12.
How to speak to influencing
Be VERY realistic – he doesn’t need
support from you
Give clear instruction – get firm
commitment in writing or through
handshake
Use confrontation as last resortpersuasion and encouragement work
better
Accept failures and encourage – don’t
punish
19
Steady
20
Steady


1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
35% of population
Behaviors
Slow paced – both people/task oriented
Typically cooperative/efficient
Can be counted on to get a job done
Fairly reserved
Pays attention to detail
Loves structure
21
Steady

7.
8.
9.
10.
11.
Behaviors
Very stable
Good team player but pessimistic
Appears casual or conforming
Reaches objectives through cooperation
Tends to have warm personality and
calming effect on others
22
Steady

1.
2.
3.
4.
Speaks
Usually not initiator of conversations or
new ideas
Likes stability of groups – uses “we” or
“us”
Gives practical advice
Asks “how” not “when” or “if” questions –
uncomfortable initiating decisions
23
Steady

5.
6.
7.
8.
Speaks
Thinks things over
Faithful/loyal – sometimes to a fault
May not communicate well under stress
– keeps thoughts and feelings to self –
becomes silent or non-involved
Will not attack- suppresses anger but
holds grudges
24
Steady

9.
10.
11.
12.
Speaks
Stores up grievances; ultimately making
him suspicious of others
Can overuse kindness when
assertiveness is more effective
Often doesn’t say “no” when needed
Presents thought out, step-by-step,
orderly plans
25
Steady

13.
14.
15.
Speaks
Can be blunt when disagreeing or
defending self
Withholds expression of true feelings;
rarely expresses much enthusiasm
Tends to think in term of either/or; rarely
thinks to compromise
26
Steady

1.
2.
3.
Listens
Patient empathic listener due to people
involvement
Demands honesty and openness
Tends to withhold evaluative feedback;
has excellent insight but won’t share
unless asked
27
Steady

4.
5.
6.
Listens
Creates open-door atmosphere in which
sharing work and family issues is
acceptable
Controls emotional expression so
speaker feels accepted
Can be wonderful conversationalist
because he is wonderful listener
28
Steady

1.
2.
3.
4.
How to speak to a steady
Provide a sincere, personable, agreeable
environment
Show sincere interest in person,
particularly in his family
Ask “how” questions to get opinions
Draw out goals systematically
29
Steady

5.
6.
7.
8.
How to speak to a steady
Present new ideas or departure from
status quo in non-threatening manner
and show the benefits
Clearly define goals in new plans and
point out how he fits into those plans
Provide personal assurance and
reassurance
Give specific, constant appreciation
30
Steady

9.
10.
11.
12.
How to speak to a steady
Refrain from aggression, ultimatums and
conflict
Always use logical, systematic rationales
when explaining or asking for
cooperation
Give time to process and make decisions
Be loyal and supportive
31
Conscientious
32
Conscientious


1.
2.
3.
4.
35 % of population
Behaviors
Slow paced/task oriented
Highly analytical perfectionists who love
detail
Tend to be introverted and guarded in
relationships
Avoid risk-taking at all costs
33
Conscientious

5.
6.
7.
8.
Behaviors
Seeks safety of rules and regulations
Appears formal and conservative
Follows rules/meets deadlines – expects
others to do the same
Gets results from working within
guidelines or structure to ensure quality
and accuracy
34
Conscientious

9.
10.
Behaviors
Often prefers to work alone rather than in
groups
Sought for advice about details and
routine
35
Conscientious

1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
Speaks
Passes the buck if asked for answers
Yields a position to avoid controversy
Defensive when threatened
Exact about details; may talk at length
about details that seem unimportant to
others
Feels quality is extremely important
36
Conscientious

6.
7.
8.
Speaks
Asks MANY, MANY detailed questions to
clarify others’ positions
Slow to respond due to processing ALL
information
Extremely critical of own work and highly
critical of others not meeting
expectations
37
Conscientious

9.
10.
11.
Speaks
Influences by collecting and organizing
factual data and logical presentations
Seldom admits true emotional reactions
and will withhold insights and opinions
until feels it safe to share
Seldom gives positive feedback or
appreciation to others
38
Conscientious

12.
13.
14.
15.
Speaks
Has a special talent for organizing and
communicating instructs correctly
Follows rules and fulfills commitments
Will seek opinions to argue or move on
to seek someone else’s opinion
Very cautious about expressing opinions
or making decisions until all data has
been checked and rechecked
39
Conscientious

16.
17.
18.
Speaks
Enjoys intellectual argument as a way of
exercising reasoning ability
Seems to take little initiative or contribute
few ideas
Fears criticism and may keep to self to
feel protected
40
Conscientious

1.
2.
3.
Listens
Attentive, intuitive listener; sensitive to
feelings of speaker
Misses main point and get off on
tangents
Asks MANY, MANY questions, which at
times may feel like attacks
41
Conscientious

4.
5.
Listens
Needs to hear the same thing
repeatedly, reprocess the same info and
ask the same questions
Takes criticism or comments personally
although not aimed directly at him
42
Conscientious

1.
2.
3.
How to speak to a conscientious
Take time to prepare a logical case in
advance
Provide straight pros and cons of ideas
and support ideas with accurate data
Provide exact job description with
precise explanation of how each fits into
the big picture
43
Conscientious

4.
5.
6.
7.
How to speak to a conscientious
Provide reassurance of no surprises
Provide step-by-step approach to goal
Be specific if agreeing; disagree with
facts not person
Prepare to provide MANY explanations
and answer “how” and “if” questions in a
patient manner
44
Conscientious

8.
9.
10.
11.
How to speak to a conscientious
Encourage V independence as well as
job independence
Provide MANY assurances that you
value quality and accuracy
Refrain from antagonistic responses that
breed withdrawal and avoidance
Offer much reassurance and support
45
Analyzing Style to Prevent
Interpersonal Conflict
Adapt own behavior slightly from
relationship to relationship
 Realize that a person’s communication
style is his natural orientation toward
getting work done; it has nothing to do with
his perception of you
 Less likely to clash if you realize that four
styles are necessary to get work done

46
Analyzing Style to Prevent
Interpersonal Conflict
“D”s get us going and keep us on task
 “I”s provides optimism, energy and humor
to create positive creative atmosphere
 “S”s calm us down and get us to slow
down so we can do the job right
 “C”s keep us on task and in line with the
rules

47
1.
Adventurous
 Polished
 Stable

48
2.
Receptive
 Determined
 Enthusiastic

49
3.
Steady
 Exacting
 original

50
4.
Poised
 Patient
 Orderly

51
5.
Forceful
Persuasive
Settled
52
6.
Cautious
Bold
Outgoing
53
7.



Persistent
Cooperative
Brave
54
8.
Attractive
Controlled
Correct
55
9.



Competitive
Diplomatic
Accommodating
56
10.
Careful
Decisive
Popular
57
11.
Dependable
Accurate
Inventive
58
12.
Convincing
Consistent
Open-minded
59
13.
Positive
Cordial
Even-tempered
60
14.



Conservative
Eager
Entertaining
61
15.



Amiable
Systematic
Self-reliant
62
16.
Sociable
Unhurried
Precise
63