Parents & the Promotion
of Behaviors That Help
Children Succeed in
Kindergarten
Why does behavior
matter?
Kindergarten teachers will tell you that
the ingredients for success must
include the ability to:
•
follow rules
•
sit and listen in circle time
•
attend to and follow directions
Every parent and caregiver struggles
one time or another with how to set
limits on children’s behavior without
harming their self-concept.
The goal of positive discipline is to
teach children to develop safe,
socially responsible behavior that
respects the feelings and property of
others!
Discipline and Punishment are not the same.
Discipline is guidance and teaching that
promotes positive behavior. Punishment is
a penalty imposed in reaction to
unacceptable behavior.
Positive discipline is more effective than
punishment because desirable behaviors
that last a lifetime must come from within
the child rather than be imposed by
others.
Guidelines for Positive
Discipline…
• Keep emotion out of the picture! Never
humiliate your child or imply that he or she
is ‘bad’. Focus on the behavior—be firm
without being emotional!
• Keep your rules simple, clear and specific.
Help your child correct the mistake when a
rule is violated.
• Avoid power struggles at all costs—
especially with 2 to 4 year olds!
• Offer children only those few
choices that are acceptable to you—
never ask if they ‘want to’ do
something that they must do.
• Avoid overusing ‘no’—save it for the
most important situations. Instead,
restate the rule, give the child a
choice, or redirect the child.
• Model desired behaviors for your
child—don’t ask them, for example,
not to yell or hit, if you do!
• Make sure your expectations are
realistic—learn what is appropriate to your
child’s age.
• Be consistent but not rigid.
• Plan ahead! (A key to positive results!)
Don’t let children become over-tired or
hungry, or push them beyond their limits.
If you know a situation will trigger
problems—avoid it!
• Child-proof your home and environment to
avoid problems.
• Plan ahead to keep children busy with age
appropriate, fun activities. Busy children
who get enough attention are happy
children.
• Maintain a good balance between active
play and quiet play.
• Set rules that are respectful of children
and keep their interests in mind.
• Always acknowledge children’s feelings,
especially when you are setting limits. How
they feel is important, and it is critical
that they feel heard and understood!
Finally…
• Make sure your children have
opportunities to practice rule
following and listening in groups
before you send them to school—
Good choices might include
quality preschool programs,
playgroups, church programs, etc.
Children prefer positive attention to
negative attention, and they thrive
and learn better as well.
You can prepare your child for school
by learning to use Positive Discipline
to create happier children who enter
Kindergarten…
Ready to learn!!!
References:
Positive Discipline A to Z—1001 Solutions to
Everyday Parenting Problems—Nelson, Lott &
Glenn
Positive Discipline for Preschoolers—Nelson
Erwin & Duffy
Loving Your Child Is Not Enough—Nancy Samalin
How to Talk So Your Kids Will Listen and
Listen So Kids Will Talk—Adele Faber & Elaine
Mazlish
When Your Child Drives You Crazy—Eda LeShan
Your Child’s Self Esteem—Dorothy Briggs
Without Spanking or Spoiling—Elizabeth Crary
A Guide To Discipline--NAEYC