Description/Narration Kendall Cross, Jillian Doke, Sava Dujanovic, Kianna Lee, Luana Mello, & Ashley Quinn APELAC 3, Period 5 Definition of Description Using words to depict or re-create a scene, object, person, or feeling Builds detail and brings immediacy to a subject Reading Description Appeals to the five senses: sight, sound, smell, taste, and touch A writer’s involvement with the subject will determine how objective or subjective a description is Objective: tries to convey subject impersonally, without emotion, used in scientific writing Subjective: impression of the subject filtered through firsthand experience Reading Description Continued Effective description requires dominant impression- central theme to which readers can relate all details Point of View is key Real or imagined physical relation to subject Psychological relation to subject Analyzing Description “It is air so heavy that it weighs on your tongue, as if you can open your mouth and take a sip. It is a soup, a big hot pot of soupy air, fetid under the equatorial sun.” Blue = Figures of speech Red = Specific, concrete details Developing a Descriptive Essay Thesis: choose a subject and specify in a sentence the dominant impression you want to create Organizing: arrange details in a way by which readers are not confused by shifts among features Spatial organization: near to far, top to bottom, left to right Chronological sequence of event Revising & Editing a Description Essay Have you in fact created the dominant impression you intended to create? Check quality & strength of the impression of details, cut irrelevant Are your point of view & organization clear & consistent? Watch shifts from I to one Keep a sharp eye out for vague words and use details that call on readers’ sensory experiences Five Main Points to Remember about Description: 1. Requires central theme to which readers can relate all details 2. Appeals to senses- sight, sound, smell, taste, and touch 3. Organize details near to far, top to bottom, left to right or chronological order 4. Cut out vague words (loud, short, etc.) and irrelevant details 5. Examine subject one sense at a time to conceive concrete words and figures of speech to represent sensations and feelings Ex: Does acid describe the taste of fear? Definition of Narration You narrate every time you tell a story about something that happened Narration helps us make sense of events and share our experiences with others Used to entertain, explain, summarize, persuade, etc. Majority of what we read and write Reading Narration Narration relates a sequence of events that are linked in time Illuminates the stages leading to a result, often serving a larger point Several possibilities of arrangement : A straight chronological sequence that relates events in order of occurrence Final event of self revelation Reading Narration Continued An entire story in a summary Flashbacks that recall significant event Point of view, a position relative to the events: Pronouns indicate the storyteller’s place in the story Verb tense indicates the relation of the writer in time to the sequence of events Analyzing Narration “After my father died, a grey cobra came into the house. My stepmother loaded the gun… The gun jammed. She stepped back and reloaded but by then the snake had slid out… For the next month this snake would often come into the house and each time the gun would misfire or jam…” Black = chronological order Red = past tense Green = transitions Developing a Narration Essay Address the questions of who was involved, what happened, when and where did it happen, why and how did it happen Be sure to identify your point of view and attitude Expand and compress the reader’s intention with details Make a thesis explaining why the event was significant Organized with dramatic events in sequence When drafting, experiment with dialogue and use chronological order Revising & Editing a Narration Essay Is the point of your narrative clear, and does every event you relate contribute to it? It should be obvious to the reader and no distractions by insignificant events Is your organization clear? Make sure readers will understand any shifts in time Have you used transitions to help readers follow the sequence of events? Reviewing and Editing Continued If you have used dialogue, is it purposeful and natural? Make sure the quotations move the actions ahead Practice reading the dialogue aloud to check that it sounds like something someone would actually say Five Main Points to Remember About Narration 1. a story with a chronological sequence 2. utilizes transitions and points of view 3. remember to have who, what, when, where, and why 4. Use personal experiences to enhance your argument (make sure your narrative has a point) 5. Use clear transitions to make a rational sequence of events Précis Practice In Kaela Hobby-Reichstein’s “Learning Race” (1999), she suggests that racism is something that one is taught, not born with, and that it takes away people’s, “childlike innocence” (85). Growing up with a best friend of a different race helps Hobby-Reichstein illustrate the absence of racism in children and the lack of separation between children of different races, until taught otherwise by adults such as the teacher who claimed Reichstein’s painting was, “wrong” but “she wouldn’t explain why” (84). She recalls eyeopening childhood experiences of racism and cultural differences in order to comment on the ever-present racial stigmas of the world, and the lack thereof in children like Reichstein who only noticed “the creamy pink color of my skin and deep brown color of her skin weren’t the same” but not the difference between them (84). Reichstein intimately addresses adults who taint the innocence of children with racism and hatred, the feeling of which she recalls “I learned the feeling of hatred and it hurt,” by using personal and painful narration of her experience of bigotry and racial injustice she experiences as a child, and she reveals the “hatred differences can inspire” (86). Practice Description Homework Read the essay entitled “Learning Race” on page 83 in Narration Practice a précis Homework: Read the essay entitled “Starrucca Viaduct” on page 107 in Description