FINISHED TIME: 41:30
COPILOT RATING:7.0
Task 1:
From the data, we could see that the percentage of students in the mentioned four
countries has had a stable growth year by year, except Korea.
Starting from 2010, South Korea took the lead with having 15% of student population
studying abroad, later followed by Taiwan and Germany. Five years later, though South
Korea still the most of them all, Taiwan has a larger increase with six percent,
surpassing the growth rate of any other countries. Lastly, in 2020, Taiwan finally
surpassed South Korean as the country with the most student population studying in
abroad. Germany and Brazil also show an increase in the growth percentage, and the
percentage gap has never been closer. Although Korea is still at the second place
among four countries, the growth of percentage shows a decrease in the data.
Task 2:
Knowledge is power, as the saying said, therefore we took general education into
quantitative subjects, using scores and achievement to define a person’s success or
key to the future. Though it’s the easiest way to distinguish capabilities, many of us have
forgot the power of emotions.
Emotions make us human, and also a powerful tool, it could allows us to present our
feelings, be empathetic, and generate a personality. But it is a double-edge-sword, such
power could turn into danger if not controlled properly.
Back when I was in High School, I am that type of person who only focusing on
academic results, I have no skills of making friends and lack of energy when facing
people, my brain will be blank once I wants to voice my thoughts and feelings, later
turned into anger. Fortunately, I joined debate club in the following years. At first, I didn’t
know what to do when forced to be on the podium and state our group’s perspective,
and when the opposite team trying to debate about the unusual part of our resolution,
my head was full of constructive thoughts and ready to defense for ourselves, yet, my
emotions had beaten the clear thinking, the whole debate turned into conflict. It was a
siren which I tell myself, without emotional intelligence, your academic knowledge would
be nothing at this point, balancing is what I need.
After acknowledging and practicing, networking and voice out my thoughts are no
longer a challenge for me. Moreover, I became open-minded and embraced different
voices. In a nutshell, I’ve grow a lot throughout the journey, thanks to caring both
academic qualification and emotional intelligence, non-of-them should be neglected.
Task 1 – Academic Report
Band Estimate: 6.5–7.0
Strengths

Clear overview of trends and exceptions (e.g., Korea’s slower growth).

Good use of comparative language (larger increase, surpassed, gap has never
been closer).

Logical chronological progression from 2010 to 2020.
Areas for Improvement

Grammar & phrasing:
o
“South Korea still the most of them all” → still had the highest percentage.
o
“the growth of percentage shows a decrease” → the growth rate slowed
down.

Article usage: Avoid “the South Korean” when referring to the country.

Cohesion: Use more linking devices (however, in contrast, meanwhile).

Data precision: Anchor comparisons with exact figures for clarity
Task 2 – Opinion Essay
Band Estimate: 7.0–7.5
Strengths

Clear thesis: balance between emotional intelligence and academic
qualifications.

Strong personal example (debate club) that illustrates transformation.

Authentic, emotionally engaging storytelling.
Areas for Improvement

Grammar & syntax:
o
“I am that type of person who only focusing…” → I was the type of person
who only focused….
o
“non-of-them” → neither of them.
o
“double-edge-sword” → double-edged sword.

Vocabulary range: Replace repetitive phrases (voice out my thoughts →
express myself).

Paragraphing: Break into clear, separate paragraphs for each idea.

Transitions: Use signposts (Initially, As a result, Eventually) to guide the reader.