What is a proposal?
The purpose of writing a proposal is to present a plan, 1'd ea, or proJ·ect to an individual • group, or
✓ / ~ ...
v'Pv.,rsA I
organization in a formal and structured manner.
t
a. ~-p~o~osal is a formal document that outlines a plan or suggestion for a specific project,
1mt1attve, or course of action.
b. It is typically written with the purpose of persuading or convincing the reader to support or
0
~ , f l , , ,•• L-+ ~ 3. iuui-v -~t.' .approve the proposed idea.
1.r-v•~T ~--._
4. ~t'~
c. A proposal typically includes a clear description of the problem or need. followed by a
1. {v-:f rv~a:.u., ..
. detailed plan of action or recommendations.
q .
d. A proposal uses subheadings to separate the different sections.
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:r. ~ o ~ ~ . , ...
4. l--o~tc,,,.910.,...
e. Proposals are commonly used in business, academia, research, and other professional settings
to seek funding and approval. e!.,ovJ~,'olALanguage features
1. Proposals are typically written in a formal tone, using appropriate language and avoiding colloquial
expressions or)l~ Con~t.i_o ns (e.g. It's a good idea.) and Perso~~ onouns (e.g. we, I) should
NOT be used.
2. Proposals should use clear and straightforward langu,tge to ensure that the intended message is
easily understood by the readers. Complex ideas should be explained in a con~ise manner. 1
3. Passive voice helps w create a formal tone. e.,o,_/tl k Oup&M•.i'-u). / C,,O'-½l'/ 4,y~ /1..dtl\., ·
4. Persuasive technique s such as using strong and convincing arguments, providing evidence and
examples is effective in gaining readers' support.
°'f"-v~-o ✓ [
5. Formal connectives should be used to connect ideas. +-l 0 N-LVLY [ lov-i
6. Proposals follow a formal structure with a title and subheadings to organize the content and make it
easier to navigate. This helps the reader to quickly locate specific sections or information.
J,
J J
7. Using modal verbs such as "could" or "would" in a proposal instead o f " ~ " , • ~ and~~
can add a more polite and tentative tone to your language.
4
2
F.4 English Language
Writing Skills
How to write a "hook"
3. Statistic Hook
/
Using stabstics, such as numbersr deennals, or and/or percentages,
The J\,\UlA1'ii.1 and relaUonshfp of the quote to the paper needs to be ryf,..;~erwards JUSI
in case the rea
.s-b-i.u-aj
(usually
A hook is an Op..t,w~
_____
I
se~nce) in an essay that
- ~ ~ . : : : : the 'for6-t
~ aims ~ grab the reader's attention so that
s.they want to read on.
It C.1n be done by using a lew different types of hooks, which are • gyosUon quote staUsUc, or
does not quite understand.
Example (ar1Jcie): • Just 0.00545 percent of tho 550,000 boys playing high school basketball each year Jn
.,J/,..;,.,J.. ~ / ,·,._
the UnKed States become a first-round draft plck
J000
;
Basically, only a lew high school players w,11 make tt tn the NBA. Even though there are many that stnve, play,
tra,n, p,acdce, and fight lo be grea~ ~ O
~fL
Be mondful that the hook has to be tt\ated to the oyeran topic
--r -~-{;, NEIJ
.
4. Anecdotal Hook
VVhen I wnter uses a short story to relate to the topic and gain the reader's attentton. they are us,ng an
anecdote This story can be a short. personal story or one that Is a figment of your Imagination
■blog post ■speech ■argumentative essays ■anide ■ed1tonal ■diary etc
1. Question Hook 7:)q ,"If.._f...;,.;/ .../,(l'-¥.1-1oi,.. ~YU-
-fl~f./- ~,~/-1-/,w )1'": _,µl,{,r
Example (blog post)' Have you eKrwatched the hlgh.nylng{,slam dunking, an~Jaklng players that
w~d
play In the NBA 7 Every tune I catch a game on lelevis,on and I w,tness the thrill ol the game, I «:.1n'I help but
watch another one
2. Quotation Hook
A quotation hook 1s When a quote Is Ufed and
vv~ ·· ·
{I
Example (blog post):
_
.
• When I was /n high school, I was caughl cheabng.
Gmem~when used sil on my dad's lap while he drove around town del1venng ma,J.
10
I
O
Back in my day had walk three miles lo the watenng hole Just to brush my teeth.
0
10
I
------ ,-JY""::/ b ~
5. Common mlsconceptlon\
:t'....~,
~-z;
has relevance to the topic at hand. Make
sure thlS quote comes from a - cr..t,Q..ib/L sou •. Also, talk about the quote'•
afterwards
to ensure that the reader isn't confused.
Example (speech);. "Some people want It to happen, some wish It would happen, others make It happen•
want. dream. wish, and pray that they w,11 one day make It lo the big stage.
Other examples:
•
Molher Teresa once said lhat 'If you Judge people, you have no llme to love lhem. (
•
~ool me once. shame on you. Fool me tw,ce, shame on me • 11 may sound like a cllch~ bvt you
wouldn't beUeve how many vktim.s fall prey lo daUng scams not onty once. but twice
As Charles Dichens put n, ~11 was the best of bmes, it was the worst of times.·
•
Spiderman once said that '"'1th great power there must a/so come great responsibility.
Example (argumeni,t1ve essay): Many peopqtill pet14:vf that marriage guarantees a "happlly-.,ver•aller"
ending,);;;::{ -ff,.,if /°'s I
J""f'f .,.,;is
""' --H-<"~fi o
Adapted: httos•/fwww es,, ed11lwnhng-studt0/mlides0Jook
Hid Michael Jordan, arguably the best player lo ever play in the NBA. Here. Jordan talks about how people
•
U -- • •/
i
Shortcuts to Creating a Good Title
Classwortc Based on er.ti folowtng quesbons, practise wntmg d1fferenl types ot hooks.
Qt YtN ere Chou·pcrson of the SocH115dc.nce., Club. Recently, you have observed a trend: dating apps
t'sc ;,,UitCQti00
1.oJ.iu:s1 & blltBSl by Domestic Viole.nee
ha-we become more and mof"e populcr among you"9 pcoptc these days. Write o post on yow ctub's blog to
c,q,rus)'O',W"thOU9hts.
T-•
lii, Glxw Together!
Pets That Are Lm:<d And .um
Wife your hooks here;
Question Hook
,,,
Quotation Hook
,,
....
li1!ll1ml ll!w ~ in Our School
--~ 4-t k-fi,
ASwimmer's~&twi>lml:l:
Use idioma/ commonlv usrd ohrosu
Gr,at Minds Think Alika
StatJstic Hook
!Ov.b-- 7:i.~ ,,.
Anocdobl Hook
,/.-c}~ "{ J.u .
,#-~{f~Jft/~
No Pam, No Gain
Smoking Banl Better L,te than Never
li].41!JM /
1
Use figurarj,3 languagr (ffletaobm;/ sjmjle/ allusjon/ peqgnification ctcl 7fi{'6'-Ai. 1k.i/:·1COVID 19: A Blessing In Disguise
Common
mlsconuptlon
QZ.. Chino Airline has orgon,.sc.d a blog-writing c.ompetit,on oncf the winner will get o fr« flight ticket.
The. toptc is '"Chino Today: You decided to enter the competition.
Types
Question Hook
Wile your hooks here:
School Kids A f t ~
by Homework
_ $,._L
En,
-=--~
Nca;mry
A~
Nuclear Power I s
Smartphoncs Tum People Into Zmohit;s
CUba Up Close: How Ms Poon J'A,'t)gl Bask Jo Dmc
Quobtk>n Hook
lhc p11oct1iatioo, smartb-- Include KEYwPrds
The Un.sung Heroes of Hong Kong
Statistic Hook
Emma Watson~A Rote Model for Teens
f
Steve Jobs Ups & Downs of a Giant
Anecdotal Hook
Yuto Horigome
Ol)mpic Skateboarde.r that I Look Up To
Common
mlsconcepUon
~ ~dr,)
0
~ j ( writ.
Al:A Frjcn=:?:rdo
Social Media Is a
I
From Zuo to Hero How So Wa Wai Inspires Me
U l...li Shanl A PowerfuJ Woman
Sarah Ltt Has Made Me A Better Version of Myself
/ /
J,.._-f ~
Name:
~1) l-{.,;7,-v H...ftrJ
I
( 5 ) Class: 4}_ (div . .k..)
St stephen's Girls' College
F4 Paper 2 Writing
Blog Entry
What is a blog entry?
·
b·
•
A blog entry is a personal op'inion
a written
pu hshed on an informal blog. It is typically
. I th t
,
.
.
, th
art1c e a express es the auth ors
oughts ideas and opinions ' or provides information on
.
.
'
'
a specific topic.
Purpose of Writing
• Is,
• ces, news, tutoria
entries cover a. wide ran ge Of su b'Jects, .including personal experien
Blog
.
• ·
guides and expe rt InsIghts.
reviews ' how-to
They serve as a means for bloggers to share
•
.
.
1·
•
·
•
• audienc
with th eir
their expertis e • engage
e, express their creativity and establish their on me
___;;-=-;.,t't,.,,M--f
presence.
Structure
body
A blog entry often fo~lows a specific structure, including a title, introduction, main
s such
element
visual
par_agraphs, ~onclus1~n, often using subheadings. It may also include
often
as iri:iages, video~. or mfographics to make it more engaging. Additionally, blog entries
on
discussi
and
on
interacti
provide opportu nities for readers to leave comments, fostering
b
around the topic.
11 .
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Common features found in a well-structured blog post:
g,
A blog post entry typically possesses several key features that help make it engagin
informa tive and reader-friendly.
to click
1. Catchy Title: A compelling title grabs the reader's attention and entices them
and read the post.
2. Introduction: A11 intrvductory paragraph sets the tone, introduce:; :t,e topic cmd
provide s a brief ov.,r:i<JW of what the post will cover
g
3. Engagin g Content: The main body of the t.!og p',s' expands on thP topic, providin
valuable information, insights or opinions.
lc-·
4. Subhea dings: Break down the content into smaller ~.ections. makiny it skirrn11ab
and enabling readers to find specific information qwckly.
1al<,:,
5. Visual Content: Incorporating relevant images, videos or infogrnphir, t,0.,•. \,),
the post visually appealing and enhances the understanding of the ,:J~•t<"I'.!.
6. Call to Action (CTA): A blog post often c;oncludes with a CTA that e;icouragcs
readers to engage further, such as leaving comments, sharing the post on socidl
media, or exploring related content.
essential to
These features vary depending on the purpose, style and format of the blog. It's
e.
adapt these features to suit your specific blogging goals and target audienc
Language Features:
ing a
l. Tone: Blog entries often adopt a casual, informal, conversational tone, resembl
friendly conversation between the author and the reader by using contractions,
informa l words and even slang. This helps establish a connection and makes the
/
content more relatable.
ct ,:s !
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d
•• •
.
of descriptive langu age he1ps pain
v1vId pictures an
t
• The use
e
h
f
scriptive Languag •
ses evo ke
0
or t e reader. Descriptive words and phra
e
ri~nc
expe
ory
sens
a
te
cr:a
2.
overall imagery of the blog entry.
fons capture attention, and e~hance the
devices can be employed to simplify
:~a ~ho ;s and Analogies: These ht~rary
s clearer•
3epts or make abstract idea
.
complex cone
ate or confuse your readers.
.d complex language that may alien
11
d"
a
"
connection
"I " "we
h
4. Avo1
' n ~ou can be used to establish a
Personal pronouns sue as '
ions.
n ~hanng personal experiences or opin
S. with the reader. "I" can be u~ed w~~ Ind
are on
er
read
icating that the author and
"We" can create a sense of inclusivity,
es the reader, making them feel involved
the same journey. "You" directly address
and engaged.
/ 1<~11\J ~ "7,10.,.. w;{ -f;.
Strategies to engage your readers:
nd
st
r larger' audi~nce's interests, needs, and
1. Know Your Audience: Under a you
ress their specific concerns and provide
preferences. Tailor your content to add
valuable solutions.
ing
entries often begin with attention-grabb
2. Compelling Introduction: Effective blog
ts,
of questions, compelling statemen or
opening hooks. These can be in the form
captivate the reader's interest.
interesting anecdotes that immediately
aging.
make your blog post relatable and eng
3. Incorporate storytelling elements to
you r
or real-life examples that resonate with
Share personal anecdotes, case studies,
1•~ -tl;...f ..?
Now, w/..,..-f
readers.
post
ussions. Pose questionK at the end of the
4. Encourage readers to engage in disc
ts or share their thoughts.
to encourage readers to leave commen
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Name: ~J-/-l,;
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( S° ) Class: 41__ (div.~)
N~vJ '1l .1
Sample Blog Entry
1
~.,,,j-.f17U
-r,·-t/.t-: 5 Essential Tips for Effective Time Management
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.for ,.__ wf2t~,1o,,._'/{ f~w -fl.l;:t
../-ldof ( 1~-1;,'o,-) .
"fis ~
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Do yoi.Yever feel hke there's never enough tirr\'e to get things done?/\Time ~ '
-;twv-0.
levels.'
stre~s
reduce
and
productivity
manage,ment is a skill that c~n gr~atly enhance
. -ft.,L.. iw4
In todays fa_st-pace_d world, Juggling multiple responsibilities can be challenging.
Howeve~, with the nght_ strategies, you can make the most of your time and. W~~~ ,,../
accomplish more. In this blog post, I will explore five ~ssential tips for effective time ,,10.. ,, JJl;r,
U
JkP-YJ---f,~
l~-f-ml'-l-Lr-J{,..•
m~nagement.
St,..;f .,,Jj-f/,. vM'/;,, - uivL d,_-,1,a/1'"-1)-ltI:lt,.,,...s • ..
54,~·'71
~)Priorit ize TM.ks: sra;by identifying your lost important tasks and priont1ze
th
them. Focus on high-priority tasks that align with your goals, and tackle em
first. This helps you avoid getting overwhelmed and ensures that you make
U
'-f ~'.,.._"";//
J.;j.(
progress in terms of your goals.
2. Set Realistic Goals: Break down your larger goals into smaller, manageab le
tasks. Set realistic deadlines for ach task, allowing for flexibility and
unexpected delays. That wa , you'll tay motivated and maintain a ~~nse offt
accomplishment as you comp te-the~fi-c. -bt,.,-0.wrs -L-t'o Jkow-tt-~v,l,,$.. •
3. Eliminate Time Wasters: Identify and eliminate activities that take up time
without adding value. Minimize distractions like social med!'i, unnecessa ry
meetings, or internet browsing. Instead, allocate specific ti1T,H blocks and use
productivity toois like time-tracking apps or website blockers to stay on tra,:;k
4. Learn to Delegate: Recognize that you don't have to do everything yourself.
Delegate tasks to capable colleagues, friends and family members. This not
only saves time but also allows you to rely on others' expertise.
5. Take Breaks and Practice Self-Care: Remember to schedule regular breaks
to recharge your mind and avoid burnout. Engage in activities that you enjoy,
such as exercise, meditation or spending time with loved ones. Taking care of
your well-being ensures sustained productivity and overall satisfaction.
Cc~Yio.._ : Effective time management is a skill that transforms your personal and professional
life. Implement thes~ tips con~istently, and watch a_s you accomplish more while
maintaining a healthier work:hf; balance. '{[.,.. t,4- N4.j ( 1t..Hi.1..,-f:,~,
0
llow,u b..1/ ><-5 !
J)k,u
of/ow ~"-b T,t
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Paper 2
_J
MODEL ANSWER
Part B Question 7
29 May20
7,fl.t. ~
bts about body piercing
~D1cthoug -
I
. ed hen I was six. I don't really remember how that came
I got my ears p1erc w
~~ 'th 't Th
WI 1 •
ere are man th
about, but obviously my parents were n
.
Y o er
types of body piercings available now, of course, and gettmg them seems to have
become a trend, especially among teenagers.
ular for a while.
o. I've seen mos
as common arnon teena ers here as
Appropriate structure for a blog
entry
ose, • ,
Ko
ut
in, ,
Appropriate register, tone and style
for a blog entry
r
[ Logical expression of Ideas
European coUDtries and the US. Is 11 a good idea for,teenagers to get piercings
:tl
(beyond the !i§byj;ti§'§jiilj ear lobe kind)? 'That depends on a few things.
~ ~ ...
'"
.
. . . .
D~ behind gettmg
a p1ercmg 1s unportanl Some'
"'t,ccnagers sa)I that body piercing is a ~ expressing their l5'.lil.
First, 1 think the
ic.,
However, the trendier and more l!1@\s!ij.iiffi it becomes, the less UDique and
'individual' the look of a nose piercing, for example, is. Others emphasise
PJW,s reasons for getting body piercings. They enjoy IJimD their appearance
and, in their view, improving it. I agree that some body piercings can look
attractive. However, no matter what the motivation is, I don't think it's worth
altering your appearance in a fairly a . way.
...,...,....._.._..~S;..-econd, I think whether body piercing is suitable for teenagers or not depends
on whether they're ffli't«ffl enough to find (and can afford) a reliable, skilful
piercer who uses m4if fliB and knows what they're doing. I've read
some horrible stories about painful M!iJN that took months to
and left
awful 1§11. There's also thr.
for getti ng~ from an infected
piercing needle. There are other serious h~Tc ~ associated with body
piercing, which teenagers need to be aware of when they consider getting
pierced. Tongue studs, for example, can become lo-:ise and end up in your
airway.
'c..
q~ina lly, we need to think about how piercings will be viewed by potential
employers once we get out into the workplace. In more @ ~ professions,
they're likely to b e ~ - While you can remove your facial jewellery,
would you want to do it every day? Is it really worth the Jffllll1
IClearly signposted structure
Sophisticated cohesion to link
sentences and Ideas
Relevant content supported with
examples
llffll
¥ffl'IP
Wide range of sophisticated
sentence structures
T-
l
i•.Jhese are just a few issues associated with body piercing. Nothing bas inspired
me personally to go down this path. Yet, as a matter of principle, it's good to
~ others' choices. So, ffi!lit@l.t@P.."'@!
Rhetorical questions to engage and
persuade the reader
Coherent closing with an interesting
Idiomatic phrase to end the entry
(408 words)
ti Wide, sophisticated and appropriate vocabulary
CEP Edge (2nd ed.) Set 6 - Paper 2
- 39 -
0 Pcmon Education Asia Limited
\
r
St. Stephen's Girls' College
Form Four English Language
Writing 11 Speech
Good speech writing is the art of crafting words and ideas into a compelling, coherent, and
memorable message that resonates with the audience. There are many different types of speeches.
Name some occasions in which people deliver a speech:
Part B: Now watch some videos. What kinds of speeches are they? What skills have the speakers used?
l)'Pes of speech
1.
h
or\11>\a.:
To!.~_ 1
~
Hook .:,J I
Literary devices /
kill J,).._
s 5 /I' I
{ fA'So"¼-I
)i""-'i\L
~- ·,--, / I( I ,,.... SlM.Sc...,:.\ "'"'-"'-W'S
.S~i'"~ .. • ~ o " - ! <:,-t,~
speeclj
Content
o.,1-\.e-u.lotv fll.N'.AJI µI,~ Iv\
Speech 1
3. V
Speech 2
l"-t"~
I
~ovo~,
f
lA'~c "'"'-l
4. _ _ _.....__ _
Speech
-t
VV\--tA.-1 '
)-"VIO ......~
t~~r v-i\.
s.v(A,,.i--( 0>'~
I
~~Ort.I~
I
~l
'
I
\
Part C: Structuring a TL, .,.""'
~ + /s~i-
y..._~
\
speech step by step
1. Greeting
•
Good morning/evening/afternoon, everyone/ladies and gentlemen/Principal, teachers and fellow
•
students.
~
Take St,t,l-{. o
into consideratio ,..._n-,;--o-=-is-:--hi:-g-:--h-er_i_nra
nt •
?
In what order will ou address them in a gra ua ion speec ?
■ e.g. &rrad
ents / teachers /~pal
,,._-e_P_n-.n-c-ip-a s/ ~
ChariY
■
Pr fessor Yuen Kwo
u g (guest of honour) __\..---- ,;
Good morning (1) "'( 2)_ __.J (3)_--'---' (4)_.....,___, (5)-t'L<'--iL-t'"Jand
(6) rv.l,<.1S I
o--~t---s
-
2. Self-introduction
My name is Chris Wong, and I'm the Chairperson of the Sports Club.
(Chris Wong, SPCA, work:
1,'....
CJ,..r;s Woo
:(vM-.
Sp C../1.
3. Welcome your ~ 1 - ~ + acknowledge the Ul-<-«.-Ston.
How would you use these words to introduce the occasion?
welcome
Welcome to the Inauguration Ceremony/the Literature Workshop /the Closing
Ceremony of the academic year 2023-24.
Honour
I -C ,I ""1 t.._ • .._.Q vV to be- ii.Pr-<-.
Meaningful
What a pleasure
~ /
/AJtv...j "'- plu...swL ,·t /1 f;. ypu-{ -(;,, 10..__ (!.,{/.
l
I
4. 1M' 05-t,
of speaking
Importance of
On behalf oftJ1e Discipline Board, I'd like to remind everyone of the
unctualit
im ortance of unctualit .
School's mentorship
ro amme
Making career choices
Promote sportsmanship
Celebrate academic
achievements
Animal cruelty
/ 'J.. {,·4- -t;.
-u~ =-vi.i's
Q,,._ -f{,..;5 •• ~c.,,..,s
O<.,,,C,,A-$•·o,,._
1olv , l '/ t b.t..- ~{f,,'
,r
OY
J _-t_•·_·_·
~....
l~---t ·s .. .
'
----4
rw~f~/
Part D: How to write 11
speech?
,
~i-i'L
.f
IO
I. Using tlu
"'-M-C•o•'$
grab attention.
d
Lad·
Do you know ...
tcs an gentlem en, do you know how many pets are put down every
ear?
first
What
Ask your self
7
What do I mea n by
... , right?
•
N~. ,,j
-
,
I
i,u <--f<
I
H'-o "V v
· _ _ _ _ _ _ your speech, each i11
r,·ca/ quesflons
np: A goo d rule ofthum b is to use -2-3 rheto
differe11t para grap hs.
2. Ruic of
•
•
•
•
•
-tl..r ..u._
"Life,
L,.h, <,.y f,}
, and the
pwr fl-L/ 1
''Government ~ the people, l bJ
, and tears"
5w _
"Blood,
"Location, location, location"
0"
and Listen"
"Stop,
b k
of happiness"
the people,
--f=!.r:-- the people"
,
r"J'1n>
/ famous
bt,< A/f:
3. Using
.f "Afr iena i,~e ed is afri end md..:ed."
--tlA
f-t ~ bcu1.. $/Lt 1l
_., It may
sl ~ 0'1...-;;i.OIA. . Fool me twice, slwiA..t.- ""'-- W\. L
'Foo l me once,
s
~ you wouldn't believe how many victims fall prey to dating scam
(.../ ;<.J..i_
sound like a
not only once, but twice.
As Charles Dickens put it, ·: ft wP-,J
11
Spiderman once said, t-vrt !.
fiL i,.,t,sf rj --t,,~s
,"-t -vM -f/4,,_ vvor .s{
~So u i ~ J"µ(__,1
Jr-4 pOINNY f/..:..urL ~ t
r
,
I
4. Using connectives
In fact // Sadly II So II For example
Well II Actually II Basically II Now II Also II
hand, ... // On the other hand, ...
//Fo r inst ance // Frankly Spe akin g// On one
II What I'm tn-inl! to say is
///It means that // This is not only, but also
uf. "-ti'..,..LS
. 11
Y-0(°,v,ilit,·~
L
.fL.(JA.1L
r audience/ Audience fM,va...--~ns
, •-:,
'
you
•
fth
tninds
the
0
e audience to understand the world from
You want to be able to step_...!.:-.::----
5.
,...t,
• perspect'1ve.
the1r
l 'm sure all/ most I
many/ some of you
agree that..
As ... we have to ...
I'm sure all of you agree that education is a basic human right
l can see that at this
point some of you
are ...
Ladil!Mnd gentlemen, I Joi'- ~£5 wrbL w.-{,,. -le _..
urge you to ...
5...;/'J 1-{~,..,~·0 I ...,,4,J I iW[J J'"' t,.~
6.
t)--4,i'a
note
Send an im\; rtant message/ Urge your audience to do something
~ -p ...
Together, let's..
"t
Join hands with me to..
I wish you all...
1 -b,
. YNb -flu- \/..t,,Y'.
Once again, •••• 5fLUl
7. Use pv-01,iv.L
l.,_,y-, 1-'\.J..(.... (....<.L"-.. ~ A. /.if -,,,,Y-vl'\
bL/.i,,.A!.t...-- -fiL....
l,Mf ,'.,.__
0
.,.,_r
..,-r.,.,.y~ ~ o ' - 0 . { L....,..,.,,k
J ().,~kt:0>1.. [ 71,._-f<
t-.1r
0
vi..
language
In your speech, things shouldn't simply be described just as "good" or "bad".
They should be f~:t,.-:tt'v I ki>YYI Mt,.) rl,l,Y".L,I ~rr1_tul j kxt,('-c,h I ii,·~rin·.,.,1;.o
For extra emphasis, add adverbs too: a.1rv/iAfv0 /ifMT(..... ,i t.,,0w--p{2.-1!-f3) ~~ J-e. )
(make sure the adverbs aJd adjectives u,;/p
u.Ji:.~
Reminders
NO title
Spoken English-+ use contractions, e.g. I'm/ You're/ It's
Tone* -+ Understand your audience/ occasion
Avoid long sentences.
F.4 English Language
Name:
Jo~
ReP.& Writing Feedback
Div.:~
Class: 't (t°°)
A. Contt
Date: _..:...-,4_L.!.../~(_O_ __
***CONTENT - requirement
"an incident"
In DSE, if 1 incident is required, but you write MORE th
. .
an 1 incident. ..
ii is still considered relevant
BUT it shows that you HAYE NOT READ THE INSJRUC
. TtONS PROPERLY
It will also lead to you spending time on what 15 not
required. and therefore writing
less about what is actually required.
"partially relevant content"=
~
• Corncn1 :s.1Jrc,\c-" rht- rC'\.)uirt"inc:nh of lh<'
= 4 max. ONLY
q~uon uJ(-qulli:I}
•
-
J\lmo'-1 IOIJIIV rdn ~nl
• Sony td...Ji an· d<'h'l,,pcd 1n dcl:i1I
= affecting CONTENT mark
• Contcm o, Cl.k.D"l\t l.nJ fulfil\ the: l'ftlU1rcnK"nh
urthrqUNJoa
• TouJJy rtlc,~nt
• Mtin tdt:.n arc- "'<'II ~,tk_,pnl
Titles
What is the name of the music festival?
Pop concert? Band show? Classical music concert? Organ performance? Choir concert (winning pieces)?
Christmas concert? Charity concert? Concert of Chinese music to celebrate National Day? Musical
performance (Open Day)?
"Music Festival" is far too vague! Create an authentic scenario!
Please be creative!
•
Report on a music festival
•
Report on the Music Festival
•
•
•
Interesting details
1
An alumna. Ms Lily leung, a world famous J,"'-\Sil.,(,,...( """""~ <...'"'"'who recently graduated from the
London Music Academy, was present as a guest performer.
An exhibition of various r,._'r'J.- ~.,_s, ._,.._I "
'""t"V'-""'1.-~s
cL-il <>
k,J, SLS'5ion
A bv--S
teachers,
tv,uC H~h... /
was held in the Music Room, including an 18th century
took place in the covered playground. Eleven_ student groups and two
' showcased their talents by performing
w~re dressed in ~r, t[""-,-\ \
(.,Cl S~"'--"""ovS
songs.
~ ' ""'
Other ideas: ,LI-\S'l.~<..
C
p._
~-nJll\.,
U'-i{:".lol
Introduction
.
Purp ose of the Concert/ Fest1Va1•
To
~'1_
_ = : . . - - - -school life
To
.OIi-.,
L.1/,..,l-f, ""'±Q.... students' musical
To y,t"t ,v14
students with an opportunity to showcase their music
al
To
{~'S t
students' interest in classical music
To
lo' Jt-< \
students' horizons
To
j t>Tvn1.<H R students to the most popular music
0
~: 1(:t
~po- x~ 5
The
genres
students· interest in Cantopop
students a live jazz music experience
Good exam ples of a relevant incident
-
talents
from
tf
,
ot~l" '-'">i gnite d flammable vegetation in the outdo
S~~l t)stQ...IM. 1'...l l , l
or venue.
failed.
The stage lights suddenly switched off.
The sM.Ol.a...--\~~~fcrrted too soon.
A student helper had a loud
1 w)...f re...\
V
with an audience member
Students performed .,.
Soi,... 5 containing swear words and adult content.
Teacher
iv-±t-l'Jiit'.o.-. was the efore t quired immediatel
y.
Due to the pre ~of Mr Hins Cheung, as the
special guest, students ran onto the
and
~~o --f..tt,\_
~ .(A__ . As a result, a F.1 student fell to the ground and herstage
arm was
a.u:~% sf4>t
0
~ •
m~miss~I w8is delayed by two hours due to the
fact that
~ Lo ~
by MC Cheung's fans.
,
±v
all entrances and C2-><-1
ou:t"e..,s were
r a loose cable in the exhibition venue and smas
hed a cello on display. The cello
incident / 1ns~d•nl/ '4~ noun
p,u .. incident .a
Brlt.nnn1c.11 Dictiona ry definitio n of JNCIO[N
T
1 1 on unea:pected ond usuollv unpleasa nt thing thot
happen,
[<oont]
• We Jus·t wont to put that embarr.us,no fnod~nt
behind us
• Two people were shot yesterday ,n two separate
/nddents .
• Aside from e few isolated lnc,dtnts , the crowd wu
Tftll·
behoved.
3
B. Language
FORMAL Language
Based on the survey aOOl:lt
v-1'
--7-+---~Enjoy Music 2023, [... ]
Student helpers attend a mandatory tra·ming
• session
. aefefe _...1T_
_f-0_-r___ the event.
Posters were used lo ramp up
it wont off without a hitch
It was all a l:>ig mess
f 1<; L
excitement.
--------
-------
Lots of guests showoe up at ______ the event
There was noone keeping an ouo
' on ______the performers
Spelling errors
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
equipments
•
•
posponed
Rehersal
Receive
Audients
Occured
Audiences
Feedbacks
Alummnies
Cooporation / corporation
•
•
•
Trainings
Practices
Arrangment
Avoid 'Chinglish' phrases:
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
3rd-person voice
Avoid using personal pronouns in a Report
X We suggest holding more meetings
The event was not held successfully (was unsuccessful)
She got the champion (won the championship/ was the
champion)
Spare instruments should be prepared (available)
Lots or ~performed (talented students)
The audience iQinfilllhe event (attended)
Performers j.Qfiled_the competuion (entered)
There were many audiences (a big :iudience)
II is suggested~ (having) + genmd
We should let them lo change (allow them change)
The club recruited student helpers 10 help.
There were performers perform,no.
There were sjngers singing.
The weather was hot and no all:,C9.ndilloner.
These problems were because or. •
Wonl choi"" / ph,aslng
-
1\/1/
Dismissal of the event '• • e
0
Causin~ incon\,~_ie ~e:
4,_~ ()..,,-\. u, j
dismiss
'\
I
~ "i... ~
"
, not the event)
1-n~-r,~-tl-L w,;ol..
~ vv-.~ V u < ; ~ "'--1\i...rw~ '5
Distur6\is dfurupl~ iterrupt
"/\
le-..l.•
X The event was lack o planning
l L~
1'• IL~I>
v.') v-- lk,(..,L<- c.>~
I
11 was e,idenl lhal '":,Cent lacked planning, and the e,ent sho,ld e e,al,ated.
QL(..t.A..''Y
.
An accident occured ancl led to the fe st1Val id not run s smooth! as ex ected
-
IA.o
v~~,~
L,Ov-\{1\,\,\-tJ.--t• / l~ "\"
Avoid using 'make' all the time
Not having enough helpers is the biggest problem that made the show
~~~o:~t:Jtv\J
not held s~ccessfully
There were also minor problems that made the event a unsatisfying experience for students
~to / lJ..,to
Usage
/ ~ ~ - L 5,.,..0....,
To ensure [n. phr.] students' safety, ... /
To ensure that students have a safe venue to perform, ... /
J:\ t-tr\..;..,._. ~ [ n . phr.) the incident, the event was still a huge success./
- J ~ n incident happened, the event was still a huge success)<
Despite the fact that an incident happened, the event was still a huge success. /
SI. Stephen Girls' College
Form 4 English Lunguage 2023-2024
Writing a Report
PURPOSE
Sif.... £\..tic1')
toc,ahmtea
to present research
to make
b
V'lol,V\J
/lU)
~
-:+-
..<Lve._~
t· j_
lo..'- 1vi1J'
S~:1:r-•:Ji o\,'\<; ~ (if applicable)
(0<....
l'Vl.(.V1~t10V1<;)
STRUCTURE
•
A clca
short, concise, informative)
►.1?f-por
ovi_ ... _(-ti~ LV->Wt\l) ri,cT.u.h
Ee o
: .fui _u1v,u;t,J~'.lt>Y\ '"to .. _' (it-(_ ~rt\Arq-\t>\A~ tt,.e_ I_loucl crf ~-- ssGC
Yl
•
l:l_y,o-.l. <; 15
"-ti O\lt)tl1{. _Risi..,., .. H_t,.1.-,\C1.LV
~- 6
r
rY\~
Introduction
■
Background to the event/incident/topic
■
► Consider
~urpo-~
\
•
( ti,.t.. s,t....
5 V\.) 1H- &"'-<..·sti<>V\';
-L.
' . ..__
1
--
/
Discussion
►
Discuss the problems/findings and divide them into sections.
►
Put only one problem/finding(s) in one
►
ft\-f ~ ✓c,..~ k
.
Make sure each paragraph has a clear ±o \1 v$.l-i~l.0, , ,,_,.(C\..k,0,...,11...f' ""'-+ L-J
J/: ~ e of your obser:1ation: i.e. to show 10w successful an event was, you could:
~ VJ;
■ Give
t...--evidence i.e. how many/what proportion participants, ..
.,½,
qlAfl-~1t-:i1\/
■
\I
e.g.------------------------------Give i....._j:{ .....i,vz., evidence i.e. what the participants said they felt about the event
e.g.-------------------------------
•
Recommendations
Give recommendations based on the problems you have discussed
* Don't discuss a problem without giving a recommendation for it
* Don't give recommendations for problems not previously mentioned.
•
Conclusion
A general comment (avoid summarizing or repeating what·s already reported on)
~~c..
l"
J,f
-Ht:::
,, I,~ A<"
'
'
\•o"C,'
\ ' ( (, C , , , , , ~ ,
l>'-'
I
u•'~
l-,\,· \'i ' ~ ~ L
I ::...:.-:-----
~~ading.s arc used to divide t 1e content Ill relevant sections. l nderlinc-t e subheadings. It should be
short and pn•dsr•
.\'
Then! cll'C' ,,ot e11011gh helpers
✓
/11s 1tjficifllt /1/0IIJ)OII'('/'
•The subheadings cnn hr,!!J!Plbctt~ but make sure your numbering system is consistent
LANGUAGE
•
Language is always formal
•
Usually written in the rCL\t fL,\.'\<,~ (Use ~(et,e..\1tense for analysis and past tense for what
happened)
e
A VOID a
f ~l>"··'-\
:int of view/ use ~f. {~1st/ (L,1..0'"L ~.l,l'')t,(l
1.,\
r
ol'\OV-..1'\
X ()reco111111e11d ~/wt ...e_hmklosk ... I bep,111011 ...
✓ use the ·rt.½,v.L vo\l--L
•
: It is suggested tlwt the furniture i11 tl,e room be removed beforehand.
AVOID asking questions or usin~direct speech,
X /11 tl,e sun·ey, the st11de111~1•as great /11(]1 Some st11de11el,e acti11ity made 11,em feel
1111comfor1able.
Use ( L ~0 •'
!
t
L,t\.,
"t
I
l.L..t.,lA
:
.1/.J.J
\..:..l
~Dl'.L.'>SUA.. IIA.<>v-.""\' -,
The studellls coll,memed thar 11,e eve111)1·as (1111. II Some st11de111s
reflected 11,a, tl,ev experie11ced discomfort during the acti11in,.
It's. They're, We're_/-
TONE
•
Av,.Ri,.t.Af,.L r\\l\J.--l'l\l/2)
is important -A report usually ~1as a specific audience. Who
is the target audience?---"? tl-L
•
rriKv~r\ --=~ ~0 '-'..t.-: yJ:1.L 1 _f~r~\, +,-l\""~\_J
Create a neutral, objectin, factual tone, do not use adJect1ves such as great / terrific X..t..,.,..cb c,,-....__ \
X Students said that the event was held terribly.
✓ Students commented that they were dissatisfied with the arrangement of the event.
•
Mustalwaysbc
i~'IAr,--l•1"-I
( ~11.iY
r,vj
■
SAMPLE WRITING
Rep
uki )?,-ht>)'\
t
or on the Technolog y Expo
Title
cU Introductio n
.
To infom1 students of technologic I t d
Backgroun d
a ren sand raise U1eir interest and
.
d
~
T
w1 crstandmg of recent innovations
- - - • a echnology Expo was organised
., .
b
1
"
I
report ili""'•I
This
_art_n_1e..:.11-"t.
Purpose of report
- _y_t_h_:ll_D_e...,p .
"'"" o--eva uate<the.evenrand offer
..__
\1
W
..
ffe0mmenda11onscon~~Y-S-"to-improve-in 1hefutul'e!
wn"-YL
(2lDctaili ')7,-i-'
/
L- 1
,
.
)
W\,l.V)
L,c. '"' [,,tvv.
The Expo was held in the Great Hall between fu!_m and 6pm on 41h --I
. .
December. Ei ht com anies and or a01sat1ons
were invited to set up
.
stalls m the hall ~howcas e cutting-edge technologies. osiers and 'U'J
leaflets were distributed to students__prior to the~To facilitate
'--'r •01'),L
In
\\o
Brief summary of
'\.
event
Information should
be presented in a
~\
clear manner
operation, student helpers were recruited to assi c~panies and
students. However. a few incidents occurred during e Expo and
various participants enc:>fitered P.roblems.
w\,c.:\ \,c;..~Vt~i .2t ;t.,..y:1,\ 1
t\,,-e ~ve,1/\\ w\-io
31 Problem
b~-s<- '-~ 1c.,n
J
J
/
sa..t1·,;f
3. I liisiHlicril manpowg ( f\ot -<..V' v<.f l,u l fLYS')
It is reported that th1::re were not enough student helpers to caterJ ~
helpers
needs of guests and visiting students. It was noted that only
were recruited to assist the 200 guests. The problem became evtfe~t
when the hall became packed with people after lunchtime. It was also
observed that the helpers were not irnn1ediately available when guests
needed assistance . .When a student fainted at 3pni.. it was later reported
\:i
Subheadin g
Short and precise
Discussion
Main point in one
paragraph
that he was unable to seek help as the helpers were preoccupied wjl_h
other duties.
~ <;;>A•v~'1
J
/
3 .2 Poor"ntanning
the
of
70%
than
Jn a survey conducted after the event, more
participatin g companies and organsations expressed their dissatisfaction
towards the arrangemen t of the event. The majority of the particip81]_!s
complained that they were not given a schedule and rundown of the
event. ~ . a Q&A session was scheduled at 4pm but many
st~ were no.1,info=1 ?.:,forehan d. causing co~fusion among helpers
and guests. II was also reported that several sessions of the event were
delayed·because of the poor communication between di ITcrent parties
-Use quantitative and
qualitative evidence
and the expo overran by JO minut~ Complaints have also been received
regarding the queue time f o ~ g workshj;'ps and th cancel~f
I robot demon~ Out of t he 350 respo nd~fthe survey, 75%
of them believed that ~1e event was not well organised. It is clear from
the participants' feedback that the event lacked careful planning.
l)SYI~ \
4 -\\v_ 2
~(o \,~ws
With referenJ to participants' feedback and survey results, the
Transitional
following recommendations have been made to improve the operation of paragraph ( optional)
t ,
GJRecommendations L
.+·... •
1 o..J,
''""--vvv--~
4.1 BetW:QllfflffiFg/
' \....vf
\/'J'r)l.~ S
ensure that prompt assi~ce js provided to participants, it is
"Yo
Recommendations
suggested that a more thorough planning of the event be m a d e , ~
~ ~ _ 2 : J h e exact number of participants and the c a p ~
e venue. Department members should hold more meeting<SJ~
rcparatio for the event. There should also be more worksho~r
to e uce the queue time. It is also recommended that the event start at
an earlier time to reduce the possibility of an overrun.
4.? ~diti~
~
Another recommendation is that more h e l p e r s ~ - It&_
~ i d a n c e team members be invited to monitor students in
case of unexpected incidents. Teachers should also be present to
supervise students and ensure their safety.
J~
~ . C... o,, '--l IA'5 cc, '1 /a.l.?c>v-C,,t✓~
With the aforementioned problems, it is eviden_,1 that the Technology
...
Expo was not held successfully. It is hoped that with more careful
planning, improvements could be made for the smooth running of future
events.
Conclusion
Int rod uct ion
Useful Ph
tnses and S
'
tru ctu rcs for \Vr itin Re orts
Th e aim of th1·s
rep
ort
.
(e
.g. a sur vey car ried ts to Pro vid
e an evaluation f \
als o pro •d
out by the Student
of.l_+ u ... '2-v t..0 \ )ti s based on
v1 e sug ges t"
\ .
ton s and rec onu n s Associat'ton)
Q U.O
as well as (e.g. comments from teac
ttng fro m som e
hers). It will
endations for
•
----.:..::-:;.'..!p~r~ov~e~m~en~t:.:..- - It ts cle ar fro m Stu deone'
-----------~
Co mm
nts fee dba ck that
Reporting Observations
ent s fro m stu d
It h
It has been noted that ..
ent s sug ges t tha t •
\
as bee n me ntio ned tha t
I h
It bas been observed that ...
t as als o bee n rep orte d tha••.
t
Yet another observation is that ...
Ex pre ssi ng p
.b
•
•
•
.
Another aspect to highlight is ...
oss1 le Res ult s of Problems
his cou ld lea d to ...
'°Expressing Causes of Problems
Th is ma y we ll res ult in ...
T-h1s could be due to (the fact that
) ...
Th is mig ht giv e rise to ..
This could be attributed to (the fact
that) ...
On e pos sib le out com e of this
Thi
s
cou
ld
be
the
resu
lt
of ...
could be .. .
. .. has been attributed to.. .
Th is cou ld hav e ser iou s implica
tions for .. .
. .. has been linked with .. .
'_!Eis cou ld hav e a neg ativ e imp
act on ... .
Su est ing ide as
Sug
It wo uld (no t) be adv isa ble / practic
..,gesting Solutions to Stated problems
al to ...
e solution to this problem .:ould be
\ lt is bel iev ed tha t the mo st effe
... .
ctive way
To combat this, ...
\ to ..... wo uld be to ...
Thi s could be prevented by ... .
. . . mu st be tak en into acc oun t/
consideration.
To improve this situation. ;t is sugg
es•.ed that ...
A (more spacious a"'a ) would be
the solution .
. . . would be an effective way of dea
ling with this
problem.
ln light of this, the following measure
s should be
taken. It is therefore believed that
... .
If this is to improve, it is vital ...
.
To rectify this, it is essential .. .
Co ncl ud ing
.
.
.
be carried out, the ... will
Sho uld the se rec om me nd atlo
be unproved.
ns
Wi th som e car e fu l P lan nin g' improvements could be made.
im·
Ton e & Style:
bik e ➔ such as
A-1-t:-➔ many/ a grea
t amount of
A-l-01 ➔ significantly/ considerabl
y
+hings+wmelhing ➔ use a more spec
ific word
No t-eu gh- 0f ➔ a lack of/ a shor
tage of
-Useful voca
bulary- Unit 6
d four albums, received 14 G
.
h
1. Taylor swift has re Iease
, to!)(
rammy nominations and became t e
/i
.,.,-:-:-- I '
.
) I \'\J~
Y\A\.V,
I (A •'-I'\.
male artist of all time. '
most-streamed ie
=-,
!~ a l'ifetime musical performance.
2. It s a oncei~ - •
\
\
s
3 . Aft~~~ bla~~ut in the concert ha!L a mas ive screen behind the main stage flickered to life
to display a 3-minute countdown.
4. After a 30-minute opening set th e audience was buzzing and cheering with energy.
5. The screen pulled up to reveal a line of dancers emerging from backstage.
/"" ..I •. / \<
/
6. Once they reached center stage, the dancers formed a pyramid with their~-
'
7. The songs were almost all played in full w i t h ~ and choruses. She has also created a
l.,\,,bYV-.-).V, .,..,::l'f..,
\),vf') L,,
J\..DYV---S
medle)l as a highlight of her most popular songs.
8. She is known for her great mix of styles - count!:)£, folk • .P.Qp, jazz. electronic and even rock.
9. At one point, the singer even seemed to "dive" into an onstage pool.
10. The performance became more than just music - they included lively acting and dancing
performances. The choreography involves the dancers facing each other in rows, and each
individual has a scarf.
~lc.._1\J..0
st.(.,f,
S5\.ll
/
-;(="'-I.
\ ,~
11. Songs like "August" featured a lone musici~n in a flowing dress singing m(lancholi{ball~;.
12. The show featured the dramatics of a musical, but with more glittery costume changes.
13. Taylor Swift appeared at the ed~ of the stage with nothing but a guitar and a piano. She
~i
--\{W'-i'-c
explained that she leaves an ope~lot in every concert to ac us{1cally play two surprise songs.
14. The surprise songs include "This is Why we Can't Have Nice Things," a typically electronic hit
.
that was unexpectedly beautiful without its strong bass and a band playing
at the back.tv ~c.~T.--(
15. The production resembles an Oscar halftime show, with excited conce,-goers wearing LED
.
b raceI ets t h at synchronize
with the music.
,,,
Cl,~1U\.LQ....