PRELIM EXAM
A. Upon completing this lesson, students will be able to articulate the definitions of the four types of vocations and
explain the purpose of marriage as a faithful commitment to one another, consecrated by the Sacrament of Holy
Matrimony, where couples strive to please God by showing devotion to each other and building a faith-driven
family.
1 What is a vocation?
Vocation comes from the Latin word “vocare” which means “to call.” A vocation is, essentially, an occupation. In
a religious context, a vocation implies someone has had a divine call to live a religious life. Through the
Sacrament of Baptism, we all have one calling in our lives: holiness. This means following Jesus to the best of our
abilities.
However, holiness will look different depending on one’s specific vocation. It’s important to listen and recognize
the signs that determine how one answers and finds a place in life.
2 There are four distinct types of vocations in the Church.
Religious Life — Commitment in life to live as Christ lived through vows of poverty, chastity and obedience.
Priesthood — Conformed to Jesus Christ through the Sacrament of Holy Orders, priests are called to be chosen
instruments in the world.
Married Life — Faithful commitment to each other consecrated by the Sacrament of Holy Matrimony, they strive
to please God through their devotion to each other and building a faith driven family.
Single Life — Commit their lives to serve others in their work and prayer.
In the Christian perspective, marriage is seen as a sacred covenant between two people and God. Christians believe
that marriage is intended to be a lifelong commitment, based on love, respect, and selflessness. Marriage is also
viewed as a reflection of the relationship between Jesus and his church, with the husband representing Jesus and the
wife representing the church.
B. By the end of the session, students should have a clear understanding of what it means to love authentically in
accordance with God's teachings.
1 The word “love” is one of the most overused words in our culture. It is also a word for which everyone has a
definition and an interpretation. It is difficult to define “love” as it is to define “universe.” Think of some of the
ways “I love you” is used:
by a mother to her baby;
by a father to his daughter as he gives her away at her wedding; by a priest to his parish;
by a couple in a love scene in a movie;
by a small child to a grandparent;
by a wife to her husband when she calls home during a trip, etc.
These and many more expressions use the same word “love”, yet they mean many different things
2 How do you know that you were loved?
How did you discover that you love the particular person you now hope to marry?
For you, what is love?
Usual Answers:
a. Love as wonderful and powerful feeling/emotion - When our love is based only on our feelings, we become
focused on ourselves rather than on the person we love. We respond to what pleases us. We focus on our
personal needs, wants and desires.
b.
Admiration - It could be the beginning of love but is it only its selfish stage. Admiration is a strong attraction
toward a person caused by some pleasing quality that particular person possesses.
c
Sex - English expression "make love" which is used to refer to the marital act. Even then, love need not
always be present in the act. It could merely be an expression of lust or the excessive desire to possess the
body of the other, which is nothing else but the selfish use of the other for personal satisfaction.
3 Definition of love
a. Erich Fromm (The Art of Loving), “love is a mystery”. He can’t define love but he does give its 4
characteristics:
Care
Responsibility
Respect
Knowledge
The closest is care which means to be supremely concerned about what is good for the other person.
b.
According to Scott Peck (The Road Less Travelled), Love is the will to extend one’s self for the purpose of
nurturing one’s own or another’s spiritual growth.
b.1. The behavior is defined in terms of goal or purpose it seems to serve – in this case spiritual growth.
Love is a circular process – the act of loving is an act of self-evolution even when the purpose of the act is
someone else’s growth.
b.2. Love includes self-love with love for the other – we are incapable of loving another unless we love
ourselves, just as we are incapable in teaching our children self-discipline unless we ourselves are
disciplined.
b.3. The act of extending one’s limit is an act of effort (pagsisikap) – demonstrable or real only through
exertion. We take an extra step or walk an extra mile. Love is effortful.
b.4. Love is an act of will (ganap na pasya) – a decision, a choice. We choose to love. Lasting love is not what
we feel but rather what we do and how we act. This means defining love as making the decision to act on
our commitment to love. This definition says that love is not just how I feel about you, but what I do in spite
of my feelings when I feel good about you. Love as a decision means focusing my attention on your goodness
rather than on my anger or pain when we disagree.
We can decide to love regardless of how we feel. The opposite of love is not hate. It is indifference. It is not
deciding to love. Living love as a decision means committing myself to live out my marriage vows in good times
and in bad; in sickness and in health; and promises. When we live according to the idea that love is a decision,
then we are in full control of love. We are no longer victims of love. Love becomes something we can choose to
have at any moment of our lives
1 How to distinguish true love from false love or lust
a.
True love reflects the cardinal virtues; lust does not.
a.1. Prudence - it helps us to apply moral principles to particular cases without error. IF we have a solid
foundation in moral theology and a rightly-formed conscience, we will recognize that many sexual behaviors
promoted by the world as morally neutral such as contraception, fornication, adultery, and abortion are
intrinsically evil.
a.2. Justice - Justice is the virtue that consists of giving God and neighbor what is properly theirs. True
affection between human beings is a reflection and an authentic transmission of the love of God for us as
race, and therefore always just.
a.3. Fortitude - it is a virtue that ensures endurance in times of trials and a constant and unflinching pursuit
for good regardless of the barriers. It resists temptations and overcome obstacles in moral life
a.4. Temperance - It is a virtue that moderates the attraction of pleasures and provides balance in the use of
created goods
b.
True love is self-giving; not self-getting
True love means giving onself completely. True love is always physically, emotionally and spiritually lifegiving. Love between a man and woman is achieved when they give themselves totally.
c.
True love is demanding and strengthening; lust is easy and weakening
True love involves some very difficult tasks. It requires us to be unselfish and caring of others.
d. True love is a gift of God - God is love
e. True love is submission to God; Lust is submission to self
for it is sacred ordinance that whoever shall have first subjected himself to God's will.
God sets the example of true love for us: He loves us so completely that He was tortured to death for us. This love for
us continues to shine from heaven, and continues to perfect in all of its aspects and strengths.
C. By the end of this session, students will have developed a deeper understanding of the definition of marriage as
viewed through a sociological lens. This knowledge will allow them to analyze and compare the various ways in
which family structures are viewed on a macro and micro level. Students will be able to identify and discuss the
key factors that influence the concept of marriage and family in society, including cultural, economic, and political
factors. They will also be able to critically evaluate the impact of these factors on different social groups and the
broader community, enhancing their ability to view the world through a sociological perspective. This
understanding will provide them with an additional foundation to engage in discussions around the theological
understanding of marriage, as well as the intersection of sociology and theology in the context of family structures.
1 Marriage is a legally recognized union between a man and a woman in which they are united sexually, coop
erate economically, and may give birth to, adopt, or rear children.
2 Marriage differs among cultures and has changed historically in our own society
3 In Western cultures, the preferred form of marriage is monogamy, in which there are only two spouses.
Polygyny, the practice of having two or more wives, is common throughout many cultures in the world
4 Popular Culture Misrepresentations of Family Life
a.
Because so much of the day-to-day stuff of family life (e.g., caring for children, arguing, dividing chores, and
engaging in sexual behavior) takes place in private and behind closed doors, we do not have access to what
really goes on. But we are privy to those behaviors on television and in movies and magazines. Thus, those
depictions can influence what we assume happens in real families.
Popular culture, in all its forms, is a key source of both information and misinformation about families.
Popular culture conveys images, ideas, beliefs, values, myths, and stereotypes about every aspect of life and
society, including the family.
b.
Prime-time television, in both dramas and situation comedies, often unrealistically depicts married life.
“Reality Television” on the other hand. Highlights extreme cases or introduces artificial circumstances and/or
competitive goals, making these shows no more representative of familial reality than the daytime talk
shows.
5 Significance of Objectivity
It is known that people have perspectives, values, and beliefs regarding marriage, family, and relationships.
These can create blinders that hinder from accurately understanding the research information. It is needed
instead to develop a sense of objectivity in the approach to information—to suspend the beliefs, biases, or
prejudices one has regarding a subject until
It is understood what is being said (Kitson et al. 1996). This information can be dissected and relate it to the
information and attitudes they already have. Out of this process, a new and enlarged perspective may emerge.
How do we become objective in studying families?
One can be objective through the application of the following:
1. Scientific Methods
2. Concepts and Theories
3. Comprehension on Theoretical Perspectives on Families
4. Avoidance of Fallacies
5. Utilization of Variables and Hypotheses
6 Macro-Level Theories
a. Family Ecology Theory
The emphasis of family ecology theory is on how families are influenced by and in turn influence the wider
environment. Ecological theory was introduced in the late nineteenth century by plant and human
ecologists. German biologist Ernst Haeckel first used the term ecology (from the German word oekologie, or
“place of residence”) and placed conceptual emphasis on environmental influences.
The core concepts in ecological theory include environment and adaptation. Initially used to refer to the
adaptation of plant and animal species to their physical environments, these concepts were later extended
to humans and their physical, social, cultural, and economic environments (White and Klein 2002).
b.
Structural Functionalism Theory
Structural functionalism theory explains how society works, how families work, and how families relate to
the larger society and to their own members. The theory is used largely in sociology and anthropology,
disciplines that focus on the study of society rather than of individuals. When structural functionalists study
the family, they look at three aspects:
(1) What functions the family as an institution serves for society?
(2) What functional requirements family members perform for the family?
(3) What needs the family meets for its individual members?
c.
Conflict Theory
The basic premise of conflict theory sets it apart from structural functionalism. Where structural
functionalists assert that existing structures benefit society, conflict theorists ask, “Who benefits?” Conflict
theory holds that life involves discord and competition.
Families differ in the number of underlying conflicts of interest, the degree of underlying hostility, and the
nature and extent of the expression of conflict. Conflict can take the form of competing goals or differences
in role expectations and responsibilities. For example, an employed mother may want to divide housework
50–50, whereas her husband insists that household chores are not his responsibility.
Conflict theorists agree that love and affection are important elements in marriages and families, but they
believe that conflict and power are also fundamental. Marriages and families are composed of individuals
with different personalities, ideas, values, tastes, and goals. Each person is not always in harmony with every
other person in the family. Conflict theorists do not believe that conflict is bad; instead, they think that it is a
natural part of family life.
Sources of Power
Legitimacy
Money
Physical Coercion
Love
d.
Feminist Perspectives
Feminists critically examine the ways in which family experience is shaped by gender—the social aspects of
being female or male. This is the orienting focus that unifies most feminist writing, research, and advocacy.
Feminists maintain that family and gender roles have been constructed by society and do not derive from
biological or absolute conditions. They further tend to believe that family and gender roles have been
created by men to maintain power over women. Basically, the goals of the feminist perspectives are to work
to accomplish changes and create conditions in society that remove barriers to opportunity and oppressive
conditions and are, instead, “good for women”
(Thompson and Walker 1995).
7 Micro-Level Theories
a. Symbolic Interaction Theory
Symbolic interaction theory looks at how people interact with one another. An interaction is a reciprocal act,
the everyday words and actions that take place between people. For an interaction to occur, there must be
at least two people who both act and respond to each other. When you ask your sister to pass the potatoes
and she does it, an interaction takes place. Even if she intentionally ignores you or tells you to “get the
potatoes yourself,” an interaction occurs (even if it is not a positive one). Such interactions are conducted
through symbols, words, or gestures that stand for something else.
b.
Family Development Theory
Family development theory is the only one exclusively directed at families (White and Klein 2002). It
emphasizes the patterned changes that occur in families through stages and across time. In its earliest
formulations, family development theory borrowed from theories of individual development and identified a
set number of stages that all families pass through as they are formed: growth with the birth of children,
change during the raising of children, and contract as children leave and spouses die.
c.
Family Systems Theory
Family systems theory combines two of the previous sociological theories, structural functionalism and
symbolic interaction, to form a more psychological— even therapeutic—theory. Mark Kassop (1987) notes
that family systems theory creates a bridge between sociology and family therapy.
Like functionalist theory, family systems theory views the family as a structure of related parts or
subsystems: the spousal subsystem, the parent–child subsystem, the parental subsystem (spouses relating
to each other as co-parents), the sibling subsystem, and the personal subsystem (the individual and his or
her relationships). Each part carries out certain functions. One of the important tasks of these subsystems is
maintaining their boundaries. For the family to function well, the subsystems must be kept separate
(Minuchin 1981).
Sociologist Karie Ann Snyder identified three categories of parents on how they perceive spending “quality time”
with their children.
Structured planning parents - They had an overall shortage of time with their children and believed that only
through efforts to specifically set aside time from their normal, hectic family and work lives for special and
carefully scheduled family activities could they experience “quality time” with their teenagers.
Child-centered parents - They also felt a deficit in the amount of time spent with their children but defined
quality time in terms of having intimate, heart-to-heart conversations with their teenagers about their
(children’s) needs and interests whenever and wherever such conversations occurred.
Time-available parents -They felt that all time spent at home with their families, good or bad, was quality
time. They emphasized the amount of time together more than what occurred during that time