Etiquette Dining Etiquette Professional Attire Interviewing What is “Etiquette?” •Conventional requirements as to social behavior •Proprieties of conduct as established in any community or for any occasion Dining Etiquette The Table Surface • Keep purses, keys, devices such as PHONES off the tabletop as much as possible • Keep your elbows off the tabletop. • Sit up straight with both feet on the floor. Napkins • As soon as seated, unfold napkin, place on your lap, napkin should stay in lap until meal is over. • Never use your napkin to blow your nose or mop up spills. • If you need to leave the table or if the meal is finished, napkin should be placed to the left or right, not on the chair or on the plate. Table Etiquette Place Setting • Remember B – D. Bread – Drinks! Your bread plate is on the left. Your drink glasses are on the right. • Eat outside in. Salad fork is on the outside on the left side of the plates, soup spoon is on the outside on the right side of the plates. What to Order • Order food similar to that of your host so that it can be served at the same time. (dietary restrictions permitted). • Do not order food that is messy or difficult to eat such as spaghetti, ribs or lobster. Service • Pass to the right. Bread may already be on the table in a basket. Pass the basket to the right. The first passer, should be the last to take the bread. • Same with butter, pass to the right, the first person to pass should be the last to take butter. Use your personal butter knife. • Break off pieces of bread, butter pieces one at a time with your bread knife. ALWAYS TREAT THE WAIT STAFF WITH RESPECT! • Learn your server’s name and use it when addressing them. • Needing assistance from the wait staff. Politely say, “Excuse me.” Do not snap your fingers, whistle or call out loudly across the room. • If there is a problem with the food that has been served, do not blame the server- they did not cook the meal. • YOU’RE POTENTIAL NEW EMPLOYER IS WATCHING YOU! Beverage Service Wine. When offered wine, if you are not of age or do not want wine, cover the top of your glass lightly with your hand and say, no thank you. Recommendation: Don’t drink alcohol in a job interview; keep a clear head. Coffee. If you prefer coffee when offered, make sure your cup is upright. If you do not choose to have coffee, make sure your cup is upside down or place hand lightly over the top with your hand and say, no thank you. More Manners Do not: • Talk with your mouth full • Chew with your mouth open • Crunch ice • Place your elbows on the table • Refresh your lipstick/hair • Wear your hat if a male • Use a toothpick • Stack your plates when finished • Talk loudly • Drink alcohol excessively • Drops or Spills. If you drop a utensil or napkin, do not pick it up. Leave on the floor and ask for clean utensils. Do not attempt to clean spills from the table, ask for wait staff assistance. • Finished Eating? To indicate that you are finished with your meal, your utensils should be laid across your plate at the 10 and 4. This will clue to wait staff you are ready for the next course and your plate may be cleared. Conversation Tips Keys to good conversation during a Dining Interview Stop, Look, Listen, Watch and Ditch! ▪ Stop and think before speaking. ▪ Look at the body language and expressions of the person with whom you are conversing. ▪ Listen to what is being said. ▪ Watch by maintaining eye contact with the person with whom you are conversing. ▪ Ditch the cell phone! Except under extreme conditions such as an emergency, lock it in your glove compartment. Discussion Topics to Avoid • Politics • Religion • Money • Off color joking • Very personal and intimate details • Rambling After the Meal • Do not offer to pay for the meal. • The host should pay for the meal, however… be prepared to pay for your own. • Thank your host in person before leaving. • Follow up with a hand-written thank you note within a week. Thank You Notes • Send a thank you note anytime you feel indebted to someone. ❑ After a job interview ❑ After receiving a letter of recommendation. ❑ After someone went above and beyond to help you • Send immediately. • These notes are part of your professional branding! Writing a Thank You Note HANDWRITTEN! • Address the note to the person to whom you are indebted. • Use the correct salutation. • Express your gratitude and discuss how much their gesture means to you. • Close with Regards or Sincerely. • Again, this promotes your professional branding! Types of Attire Business Professional • Portraying yourself in a professional manner • Conservative clothing (Two-piece suit) Business Casual (Depends on type of interview) • You do not need to wear a suit • Does not mean jeans and T-shirts Casual • Neat, well-tailored clothing (jeans and a blouse) • Not sloppy or inappropriate Appropriate Attire for Men Business Professional • Two-piece suit with a crisp, solid colored shirt • Conservative tie that reaches mid belt • Polished, dress shoes that match the color of the belt • Dress socks • Check for loose buttons, broken zippers or stains. • Well groomed beards or mustaches Business Casual • Button-up shirt and pressed slacks (tie optional) • Polished shoes that match the color of the belt • Dress socks What NOT to wear! • • • • • • • • • • • Tee shirts Jeans/khaki pants Torn clothing Ball caps Showing undergarments Casual shoes, such as athletic shoes or sandals Showing tattoos (cover with clothing) Low-cut or pants worn low on hips Over-sized pants or ill-fitting clothing Facial jewelry (remove piercings) No heavy aftershave or cologne Appropriate Attire for Women Business Professional • Two-piece pant or knee-length skirt suit • Clean, ironed blouse with conservative neckline • Polished, closed toe shoes with low heel • Minimum jewelry • Conservative make up, nail polish Business Casual • Nice blouse/shirt with pressed slacks or skirt • Appropriately-fitted dress (not low cut or body hugging) • Polished shoes with low heel What NOT to wear! • Professional wear is not date or night clubbing wear. • Low-cut, or see-through blouses • Short skirts or pants that show skin at the mid section • Fashions that show undergarments • Clothing that is too-tight or too baggy • Sleeveless blouses - unless covered with a jacket or sweater (such as a twin-set) • Flashy or large jewelry • Ultra high heels/stilettos, platform shoes, open toed shoes such as sandals or flip flops • Tattoos and piercings (cover them with clothing) • Check for wardrobe flaws the night before event. • Little or no perfume or heavy smelling hair products. • Unkept hair Overall Appearance for Both Genders • Clean, well groomed hair style; out of your eyes • Use perfume/cologne sparingly • Cover any tattoos and remove body piercings • Avoid large, flashy jewelry • Clothes that fit you well and are clean and ironed • Closed toed shoes, polished • Clean fingernails • RELAX and SMILE QUESTIONS OR COMMENTS? Soup • Dip the spoon into the soup, moving the far edge of the spoon away from you. • Sit up straight, lift the spoon to your lips • • • • Do not rest your arm on the table Do not blow on your soup to cool it Do not crumble crackers into your soup Eat quietly in our culture Sip your soup • Use the side of the spoon • Do not fill your spoon full • Only babies need to have the spoon into their mouth to eat Salads • Use the salad fork when a salad is served and eaten before the main course • If the salad is served as part of the meal, use the dinner fork Bread or rolls • Place your bread or roll on your bread and butter plate, if one is provided. • If pats of butter are provided, transfer one from the butter dish to your plate using the tiny fork supplied. • If a block of butter is provided, use the butter knife to place butter on your bread and butter plate. Finger Foods • Bread or rolls, carrot sticks, celery, corn on the cob, olives, potato chips, and most sandwiches. • In informal settings, it is permissible to eat chicken and french fries with your fingers Main Course • Sometimes known as the entrée • Most North Americans eat the main course using the dominant hand Cut food into small bites • It is considered impolite to cut all of your food at once. • Take small bites; chew your food slowly with your mouth closed. • Lift the food to your mouth; do not lean down to your plate to eat. Courteous Behaviors • If you cough, sneeze, or need to blow your nose, use a tissue rather than the napkin. • It is polite to leave the table • if you have a long bout of coughing. • if you need to blow your nose General tips • Remove fish bones from your mouth with your finger, spoon, or napkin. • Deposit fruit pits or seeds in your spoon. • Do not put food from your mouth on the table, place on the side of your plate • Use dental floss or a toothpick in private. Accidents • If you spill anything, • use your napkin to mop up the spill. • If the spill is large or very messy, seek the assistance of your host. • If you drop a utensil • leave it on the floor and request a replacement. Keep your arms and elbows off the table Be polite • Contribute appropriately to the conversation so that the meal is a pleasant experience for all present. • Use “Please” and “Thank you” End of the meal • Silverware should be at the 5:00 position with the tines down to indicate you have finished • Leave your loosely folded napkin at the left of the plate. • Do not stack plates, unless asked by host. • Remain seated until all have finished. • Host will indicate the meal is over and can leave the table. • Help clear the table at informal meals. Clearing the table • Remove the serving dishes first • Refill beverages • Remove the main course plates, salad, bread and butter plates. Do not stack plates at the table. • Check that everyone has an eating utensil. • Serve the dessert Dining Out • Proper table service follows several basic principles. • The server will place an individual servings in front of you. • The server will serve all food from your left, using the left hand • The server will clear dishes from your right using the right hand. • Beverages will be served from the right. Dining with a group • Wait until everyone at your table is served before you begin eating. • Don’t begin eating until all the food is passed if service is family style. Continental Style is more formal • The fork is held in the left hand and the knife in the right. • After cutting one bite of food, the food is transferred to the mouth with the fork still in the left hand, tines facing downward. • This eliminates the transferring of cutlery from hand to hand. Zig-Zag Style • The knife is laid down and the fork is switched to the dominant hand • Do not set the knife on the table nor should you “bridge” the plate and table with the knife. • Food is lifted to the mouth with the fork tines up • The fork is held like a pencil between the fingers. Well mannered people • Don’t put more on the fork or spoon than can easily be chewed and swallow at one time. • Avoid talking with food in the mouth • If asked a question, wait to answer until the food is chewed and swallowed. • Take small bites so they can respond quickly to the conversation.. As you are eating • Swallow the food in your mouth before taking a sip of a beverage. • Drink carefully; avoid slurping or gulping. • Your knife and fork should not bridge the plate, • The knife should not be placed between the tines of the fork While eating • When pausing during the meal, cross your knife and fork on the center of the dinner plate • Leave your plate where it is. • do not push it away, stack it, or pass it to others to stack The end of the meal • When the host places the napkin on the table beside the plate. • Thank the host or cook for the meal. • You may rise and leave the table when your host rises. • At a no-host meal, wait until everyone is finished. When dining in a restaurant • You are a guest • Do not do anything that would embarrass you or the host • Be considerate of the other patrons Cell phone manners • It is rude to use a cell phone during the meal • If you must take a call, excuse yourself. • If you use the phone in public • Speak quietly so others don’t have to hear your conversation. • It is rude to use blue-tooth type devices with your phone in public. When dining out • Texting or opening your phone destroys the ambience of a restaurant. • It is rude to use a cell phone in a public rest room. Restaurant manners • You can’t afford the restaurant unless you can afford the minimum 15% tip. • If you have a problem with your food, politely ask the waiter to take it back. • Do not expect the rest of your table to wait for your plate to return. • Is it really worth making a spectacle of yourself and making other people wait when they are finished eating? Good manners need to be practiced and used in formal and informal situations • If you become accustomed to using good manners • • • • You are more confident You are more comfortable You can think about making others comfortable You show respect for other people Culture and tradition influence table manners Western Culture • Do not slurp your soup • Eat everything on your plate • Keep your silverware in your hands as you eat • Eat the meat, leave the starches Eastern Culture • Nosily eating soup is a complement to the cook. • Do not clean your plate it is an insult to the host that not enough food was provided. • Lay the chopsticks down every few bites. • Don’t leave any rice, it is sacred and must be eaten. 52 Additional Guidelines… • Try some of every food served even if you don’t like it or don’t think you will. • Avoid playing with foods on your plate. • Ask to have foods passed to you, rather than reaching in front of someone else or across the table. • Eat quietly with your mouth closed. Wait to speak until you have swallowed any food in your mouth. • Take small bites. Eat all that you take on your fork or spoon in one bite. • Look neat and talk about cheerful topics to make mealtimes pleasant. • Pass food at the table to the right with your left hand. Try not to blow on soup to cool it - it is not polite. • Cut salad with a knife if the pieces are too large to fit in your mouth. • Use a small piece of bread as a “pusher” to help guide food onto your fork. • Break off a whole piece of bread or roll into 2 or more small pieces. • Leave your silverware on the plate or saucer under a bowl when you have finished.
