Sadat Uddin
The Shadow
One day, it appeared. I woke up and as I sat up in bed and rubbed my eyes to help see better
post-sleep, I noticed it: a shadow on the wall. I was caught off guard at first, thinking “What the
hell?” The shadow was darker than most shadows; it seemed to be darker than those new
inventive blacks like Vantablack or Black 2.0. I looked around the room to see what could be
making such a dark shadow, but I couldn’t find anything. I then started to examine the shadow
even more. It wasn’t an ordinary shadow, though, like the ones that are typically made from a
source of light and projected from the object. This was different. This shadow seemed to be its
own entity, with no clear object creating it. The shadow did have a shape, though. I wasn’t able
to figure it out, but as I started to look at it further, I blinked and it disappeared. I was
bewildered. I span my head around the room frantically trying to find it. I quickly got out of bed
and started searching every nook and cranny of my bedroom, checking under the bed, in my
drawers, behind my desk, etc. I couldn’t find it. I sat back down and tried to rationalize what that
was. “It probably was my own imagination,” I thought to myself, concluding that my drowsiness
from just waking up made me see things. I brushed it off and went about my day as normal.
The next time I saw the shadow, it was during class the next day. I blinked and suddenly it was
on the whiteboard in the front of the room. I looked like it carved a hole into my vision with how
dark it was. No light seemed to reflect off of the surfaces the shadow touched, as if it was a void
that sucked everythign up. I tapped the shoulder of the girl in front of me and asked, “Hey,
what’s with that crazy shadow on the board?” She turned around and looked at me confusedly.
“What shadow,” she questioned. I sat there in shock. “The dark as hell shadow that's on the
board. You know, it makes it look like someone just straight up cut a hole into the board.” All
she said was “You’re weird,” before turning back around slowly and questioning why she’s near
some nutjob of a person. I looked around the room only to see that everyone’s face was
completely normal, with some looks of confusion at the complicated integration lesson that was
being taught today. No one seemed to be distrubed by the dark shadow that is blocking a
significant portion of the board. “Am I the only one that can see it?” I thought while I turned my
head back towards the board to see the shadow again. My thoughts began to run as I tried to find
an explanation for this. “What the heck was in the food I ate for lunch? It was just a cheese pizza
slice, how could that be causing this? Maybe I didn’t get enough sleep, I only got like six hours
so I guess I need more sleep. I’m not that tired, though, but maybe I’m a little tired.” As I was
running through all these explanations in my head, I blinked. The shadow was gone. I jumped
out of my seat while exclaiming “WHAT!?” Everyone turned their heads towards me. “Would
you like to answer the problem?” the teacher asked.
Back at home, I was pacing around my room. “There’s gotta be a reason only I can see that
shadow. Is it some interdimensional being that has allowed me to view it? Is it some sort of ghost
or paranormal creature that is haunting me? Am I just going crazy?” I sat down with my head in
my hands. “Maybe it's just sleep. I haven't been getting enough recently and I guess it's starting
to affect me.” I decided to get a headstart on my homework so that I can go to sleep early
without having to stay up all night. I stood up to prepare for the long homework grind I was
about to do. That’s when I saw it again. The shadow was on my desk. I quickly pulled my phone
out of my pocket to try and take a picture, but as I looked at my phone screen to get the shot, I
froze: the shadow wasn’t on my phone. My heart sank as I realized, “It is all in my head…” My
hands fell to my side and I sat back down on my bed in disbelief. “What is going on?” I thought
to myself. I started to examine the shadow even more. This time around, the shadow appeared to
be sitting in my chair. It didn’t move or interact with anything, and when I looked away and back
at it, it remained in the exact same position as before, as if that section of reality was just cut out
of existence. What was bothering me the most, though, was its shape. The shape of the shadow
was so familiar to me since the first time I saw it, but I couldn’t put my finger on it. I moved
closer and reached out to possibly touch the shadow. All I felt instead was the metal frame of my
chair. The shadow definitely covered the chair and the desk, but it didn’t wipe it from existence.
The shadow was also not an object that I could interact with, though. I shined my phone
flashlight on it to see if it’ll go away to no avail. All the light was just absorbed by its dark void
of a being. I was at a loss. I had no idea what this thing was and I wasn’t getting any information
on it. I looked around my room in wonder and my eyes focused on the mirror across the room
from me. In it, I could see the shadow and myself in the same frame, the first time I saw the
shadow other than where I initially saw it. This gave me two important pieces of information. 1.
The shadow was visible on reflective surfaces, but I assume only to me. 2. As I stared at the
shadow more with me next to it, something clicked in my brain: the shape of the shadow was my
silhouette. As this revelation came to me, the shadow reached out to me. I moved out of the way
and the shadow ended up colliding with my desk. Out of both confusion and fear from what was
happening, I blinked. The shadow had disappeared yet again, but the pencils on my desk had
moved like it had touched them.
The next time I saw the shadow wasn’t for another month. During that time, I started to become
paranoid. Anything that looked like the shadow would freak me out. I started to become more
and more tense and anxious of my surroundings. People at school thought I was being extremely
weird and my friends thought I was going crazy and started to distance themselves from me. The
ones that stuck around tried to help me out, but when I told them about this supposed “shadow,”
they just called on my bullshit, especially when I would go “Is that the shadow!?” at normal
shadows. They started to believe me less and less and would give up on the “insane
hallucinations” I was having. My parents were concerned for my mental health, as the school had
called them and informed them of the outbreaks I was having. They tried talking to me to see
what was up, but I didn’t bother explaining to them anymore. No one seemed to believe me, so I
was on my own to try and figure out what was going on. I would sit around in my room, waiting
for the shadow to show itself again. I stopped doing my homework, stopped watching tv, stopped
hanging out with my friends, stopped going to school, etc. My life was on pause as I waited for
the shadow to reveal itself again. It got so bad that my mom came into my room and begged me
to at least go outside instead of “staring at the damn wall!” I finally caved in to their requests and
decided to take a walk in our neighborhood park. I was breathing in the fresh air and clearing my
head. I sat down on a bench and took in my surroundings and how calm everything was. The
smell of the air, the sound of the laughter and fun of people in the park, the sight of the peaceful
world around me. It all helped me relax and I began to inch closer and closer back to reality.
That’s when it appeared again. In the distance, I saw the same dark void standing next to a tree.
Normally, I would have missed it in the background of the park scene in front of me, but after
spending the past month obsessing over this damn shadow, it was impossible to miss it. It just
stood off in the distance. I sat there in complete fear, not knowing what to do. I’ve been waiting
for this moment for so long, and now that it's finally here, I don’t know what to do anymore. I
wanted to get up, to scream to everyone that it's there, to run towards it and point to everyone on
its extreme. Instead, I stayed where I was and stared at the shadow. I don’t know how long I
stared at it, maybe 5 minutes, maybe 5 hours. My sense of time was gone. All I could focus on
was the shadow. Then, the shadow began to move towards me. For the first time, the shadow
was moving. It slowly made its way across the field and as it approached me, my flight-or-fight
response kicked in. My body knew that this was a threat and that I needed to run, since I couldn't
fight it myself. I couldn’t run, though. It felt as if there was something weighing me down,
something so heavy that I couldn't lift a single finger. I was struggling to breathe, my heart was
racing, every fiber of my being instinctively wanted to flee. Terror overcame me as the shadow
stood right in front of me and started to reach out towards me. I wanted to scream for help, but
the weight crushed my vocal cords and not a single peep would come out. I closed my eyes in
fear of what was about to happen. When I opened my eyes again, the shadow was gone. The
weight I felt on my body was gone and I could move again. Everything was just like how it was
before, as if nothing had happened in the first place.
I was tormented by the thought of the shadow for the next few months. I didn’t know what to do
anymore. “What the fuck was that all about? Why did it move, it's never done that before! What
was the heavy feeling on me? Why did it come closer to me? Why did it reach out to me?” So
many questions that I couldn’t answer. Nothing made sense anymore. Everything I did,
everywhere I went, I was on high alert. A whisper, a small change in temperature, the slight
brush of someone as they walked by me. Anything would set off the alarms in me and I would
instantly fight back. My parents became more and more concerned about my deteriorating
mental health. They put me into therapy where I would see this dumb psychologist, who would
try and diagnose my issues. They would ask me “Does this shadow symbolize something more
troubling in your life?” Stupid questions like this that clearly made no sense. I was perfectly fine.
I just needed to find the root cause of the shadow and prove to everyone that it was real. “I’m not
going insane,” I would tell myself, trying to justify running away from home and taking shelter
in an abandoned apartment complex. It was hard to evade both my parents and the police that are
searching for me. Everything will be fine, though. Let them think I’ve gone mad. I don’t care
anymore. They’ll see how right I was once they see the shadow. I’m sure of it. To make sure of
this, I devised a plan to capture evidence of the shadow. I noticed through my interactions with
the shadow that it appears to be able to make contact with this world once it is near me. When I
first saw it in the mirror, the mirror was only able to reflect the image of the shadow because I
was right next to it. In the park, the shadow was able to put pressure on me because it started to
approach me. From this information, I created a trap in my room where, once the shadow
appeared and started to approach me, I would activate a switch that would cause multiple
cameras to take pictures of my entire room. Every angle that could be viewed, I had covered. I
had no idea if this plan would even work. All I had was a hunch. But I was willing to bet on a
hunch. It was costly, and it required a violation of my morals against stealing to set up. It was
worth it, though. All I had to do was get the evidence of the shadow and it will all have been
worth it. So I sat in my room and waited. For the next few months. I rarely got up except to eat,
drink, and use the bathroom. Any other function was secondary, including sleeping. I couldn't
sleep with the terror of the shadow attacking me at any moment. I would stay awake for weeks
on end, and when my body would pass out, it would only last for about an hour before my
subconscious forced myself awake for another week or so. It was painful, but it had to be done.
All to gain evidence. My family tried to stop me, but I wouldn’t listen. They tried everyday, but I
would ignore their pleas. I stopped talking to them, and they gave up on helping me, saying I was
a lost cause. I didn’t care. All I cared about was that damn shadow. So when the shadow finally
appeared in front of me exactly 84 days later from when I last saw it, I was ready. It had
appeared at my desk again, sitting on my chair in the same position that I last saw it in. This
time, though, it was somehow darker than before. It was like I was staring into the endless void. I
started to become entranced by it, the infinity of the endless darkness within. I wanted to jump
into it and be lost forever, to get rid of all the pain and suffering I’ve gone through these past few
months and just disappear forever. I was so entranced that I didn’t even realize the shadow had
gotten up and started to move towards me. It started to reach out towards me and grab my
forearm while I was lost in the void. Then I hear a knocking sound from my door and my mom
yell “Come get your dinner!” before walking away. This snapped me out of my trance and I was
able to activate the camera mechanism to capture pictures of the shadow. The shadow didn’t
flinch at what was going on, it kept its motion of reaching out towards me. I then blinked,
knowing that the shadow would be gone for good and that I had finally won. I was ready to run
out of my room, scream to my family, friends, teachers, psychologist, the whole world about the
shadow and how right I was with the pictures. I wanted to finally end this torment and continue
on with my life again, something I had been missing for so long. I was ready to restart everything
once more, before the shadow ever appeared. Instead, when I opened my eyes, I was greeted
with the terrifying sight of the shadow, still in my presence. “What? That’s impossible!” I yelled.
I started blinking frantically, hoping for the shadow to go away. Instead, it made contact with my
arm, gripping onto it tight while activating every sensory neuron on my arm. The shadow felt
hot, cold, itchy, slimy, smooth, rough, and so many more that I did not know what was going on
anymore. I wanted to run away, to push the shadow back and bolt out of the door. My legs
couldn’t move, though, and when I looked down, I saw the shadow had engulfed my legs in its
dark void. I wanted to scream, but it covered my mouth with its hand, preventing any sound from
leaving me. I could only sit there and watch in horror as the shadow began to surround me,
covering my vision entirely. Before I knew it, I didn’t know where I was. I couldn’t feel anything
anymore. All I saw was darkness.
I came to in a hospital bed. I was drowsy and confused. My body started moving on its own,
though, without me commanding it. I could feel my limbs ache and move, my body stretch as if
it just woke up from a long sleep, my head turning and looking around the room to understand
the new environment I was in. All of this was what I would normally do, but it was as if I wasn’t
in control anymore. I was simply a passenger, feeling all of this but not able to do anything about
it. My head suddenly moved to the monitors next to the bed, where the date and time was
displayed. According to the clock on the monitor, it has been a year since the shadow attacked
me in my room. “That doesn’t make sense, how has it been a year? Have I been in a coma for a
year?” “No, not you, me,” a deep voice said in my head. “WHAT THE HELL, WHO ARE
YOU!?” My body proceeded to get up and walk over to the bathroom where there was a mirror.
My head eyed my own body up and down, as if admiring it. My head then looked straight ahead
and what I saw freaked me out. My eyes had gone completely black. The whites of my eyes, the
pupils, it was all gone. In replace of it was the same dark void that made up the shadow. “Thanks
for the body, I’ll make good use of it,” said the deep voice in my head while a smile formed on
the face of a body that wasn’t my own anymore.