HOW TO PLEASE YOUR WOMAN
SEXUALLY
an intimate pussy massage sex guide for the
modern man
By
Anna ANDERS
Copyright 2018
All rights reserved. This copy is intended for the original purchaser of
this book. No part of this book may be reproduced, scanned or distributed in
any printed or electronic format without prior written permission from the
author except by reviewers who may quote brief excerpts in connection
with a review. Please do not partake or encourage piracy of copyrighted
materials in violation of the author’s rights. All opinions are the author’s
own and are not to be taken as medical advice. Always practice safe sex and
use a safe word if necessary. There is adult language throughout this eBook;
therefore it is suitable for mature consenting audiences only.
DEDICATION
To J, thank you so much for going on this journey with me and for being so
brave in wanting to pleasure me so much in bed…and out!
To YOU, the reader, thank you for being so open and willing to please your
woman sexually. You are already a rock star for taking this first step. You
are amazing!
DEDICATION
INTRODUCTION
Chapter 1
MY STORY
Chapter 2
WHAT IS AN INTIMATE PUSSY MASSAGE?
WHY AN INTIMATE PUSSY MASSAGE?
HOW TO PERFORM AN INTIMATE PUSSY MASSAGE
TIME TO TOUCH TO HER
INTIMATE PUSSY MASSAGE TECHNIQUES
The plough
Rocking the boat
The full O
The G spot graze
Infinity
Mirror Dancer
IF SHE HAS AN ORGASM...
IF SHE DOESN’T ORGASM...
AFTER
Chapter 3
MASSAGE JOURNEY MAP
Chapter 4
BONUS MATERIAL 1
GIFTING HER PLEASURE OUTSIDE A BEDROOM SETTING
Chapter 5
BONUS MATERIAL 2
THE GAME CHANGER
CONCLUSION
LEGAL DISCLAIMER
INTRODUCTION
Performing an intimate vaginal or pussy massage on your partner is an
act of sensual trust between two people. It can bring a couple together so
intimately that it may astound you. Being soul naked and communicating
the pleasure she needs, can be a beautiful and wondrous moment in
anyone’s life. Emotions can surface, so trust yourself to know that you can
pleasure your partner and allow your partner to trust you to deliver it.
This book is ideal for those wishing to pleasure a female partner and is a
modern take based on personal experience, it has been written for men in
mind, however it can absolutely be adapted for lesbian couples. You just
might find that pleasuring your partner heightens your own sexual release,
even though that’s not the goal. You are reading this book as you want to
please your woman sexually.
You can.
And you will.
MY STORY
My journey to receiving an intimate vaginal pussy massage from my
male partner started when I first experimented with masturbation way back
as a teen. I knew what I liked, what I didn’t like, so when it came to
communicating these things to my partner, I found it difficult to have the
conversation. I didn’t want to hurt him. He was a wonderful partner, both in
and out of the sheets but something was missing.
So, taking my courage in hand, I spoke to him after one particular
night where I failed to orgasm. I wanted us to come together and he was
thankfully willing to listen! He’d been waiting for me to say something! He
had been afraid of hurting me. He had asked me “How can I pleasure you?
How can I make you come?”
So, you have nothing to fear about speaking up, pleasure is mutual!
Now we have incredible sex and that’s why I created this eBook for all you
amazing, incredible, sexy and vibrant men who want nothing more than to
pleasure your woman sexually. This book is written by a WOMAN who
knows what she is looking for and wants MEN to know all the secrets!
So, when I stripped back fears, judgments and agendas it freed me
up from guilt about hurting my partner. I was hurting MYSELF by not
speaking about my desires and in turn my partner was hurting – we were
good together but we wanted to be great together! So, we forged a path to
make sure we were both sexually satisfied.
Read on below about how we got to know each other sexually…
how many of you have done this with your partner?
1: Know where her clit is. Located at the top of her labia, tucked
under folds of delicate soft tissue, there is a small bud of highly sensitive
nerves. Perhaps you’ve tried to pleasure her orally and grazed it but didn’t
make her come. We had fun working out where she was hidden and it was a
sexy, sensual activity in itself. My partner and I set some ground rules such
as he would touch me and I would guide him to where she was located. It
was like a sexy game of hot or cold!
2: Be patient. I used to be able to orgasm within seconds in my late
teens early twenties, when my hormones where in full flight. I could get wet
at the drop of a hat but now, in my late thirties, it takes a little longer. So, if
things have changed in a long term relationship, be patient with her. Some
of the tips you will read later on will help her get wet.
5: Use toys or not? We used toys, but realized that his hands were
the best tool in the box! Toys are amazing but don’t forget what power you
already have! This is great for those spur of the moment sessions, where
you could pleasure her with your hand in the kitchen while the dishes are
soaking…that makes for exciting sexy fun!
6: Solo play before a big day. I had a particular stressful day at work
that I knew was coming. At around six AM, my partner woke me and
performed an intimate pussy massage on me…it was the most incredible
sexual act and I floated on a cloud for the rest of the day. Let me assure you,
he was well rewarded for that later that night. (He also sent me
unbelievably hot texts through the day…you’ll learn more about that later!)
WHAT IS AN INTIMATE PUSSY MASSAGE?
An intimate pussy massage includes touching of the female genital area
(outer lips, inner lips, clitoris and vagina). If you spend time working up to
orgasm via an intimate pussy massage, the results can be wondrous for your
partner. This is totally different to self pleasure or solo masturbation, as you
(the partner) would be in control.
And did you know that an intimate pussy massage doesn’t have to take
place in the bed? Sometimes it’s best to start the process of arousal in a
totally different setting, all of which will go to heighten the actual orgasmic
release! (Like I mentioned before, in the kitchen!)
You can tease your partner in public. Tell her the things you’d like to do
to her sexually...in the grocery checkout line, at the cinema concession line,
or out shopping at the mall. Getting her wet in public, knowing you can’t
actually just have sex (I say wait till you are home, quickies in bathrooms
are gross!) heightens sexual tension and can be powerful in drawing up her
sexual pleasure.
TRY THIS:
I can’t wait until I touch your pussy.
I love how your pussy feels against my fingers.
I can’t wait to pleasure you until you beg for more.
I love how your pussy reacts to my fingers when they are inside of you.
You turn me on so much, you’re my goddess and I’m going to make
you come.
If you feel nervous about saying these things, then text these thoughts to
your partner even if they are right beside you (they do work, let me tell
you!). This also works (amazingly) in a restaurant setting on date night. You
and your partner are working up a secret sexual storm in a crowded place
and it pulls you both intimately together. However, try and keep off your
phone when stimulating pleasure or creating a sexy environment (more on
that later).
WHY AN INTIMATE PUSSY MASSAGE?
Just as a full body massage can rejuvenate you, an intimate pussy
massage can relieve and release a huge amount of tension. Does she have a
stressful job? Challenging lifestyle or family situation? Then intimate pussy
play is a safe, healthy way to let her reconnect back with herself – and
you’re allowing her to do this in a safe, loving space. You’re fostering trust
here, iron clad trust that you see, hear and know that your woman needs.
Put aside your own sexual needs for the moment and pleasure her and the
rewards for her can be intense.
HOW TO PERFORM AN INTIMATE PUSSY MASSAGE
If you’ve spent time building up the energy for the pussy massage time,
then you may find your partner is already wet. If not then use some
lubricant (always ensure it’s suited to you, and always patch test and follow
instruction) keep protection handy for any penetration – if that is something
that you have decided will happen – however it’s not the goal, the goal is
her pleasure remember!
Undressing her, while you stay fully clothed is a sexy, sensual act. If you
encounter shyness from her (especially if you haven’t been together long)
take a moment and offer comfort. Our bodies are beautiful, no matter the
shape or size but we have been conditioned to forget that.
TRY THIS:
Your body is stunning.
I love how you respond to my touch.
Let me undress you.
I will take care of you.
Create a haven. Light a candle, keep the light dim or use moonlight or
natural light. Use the shadows or don’t use them. Create a soft place to
explore her, either a bed or a pillow and blanket fort on the floor. Just be
comfortable.
Once she’s naked, gaze at her intimate area that you are about to touch.
Hold her hands and simply be in each other’s presence. Breast and nipple
play is encouraged – use light, teasing touches. Being this intimate with
someone can often have positive, vibrations into your relationship. It’s not
all about fast, quick and hard sex (although that is fun too!) Gazing at her
this way is a marvellous way to see the female form and to adore it. Speak
what you feel. Tell her how you feel.
TRY THIS:
Thank you for trusting me.
Your pussy is beautiful.
I love her texture, her colour, her juice.
I want to get her ready for my touch.
Can I touch you there?
I love how she’s getting wet for me.
Does it feel good when I touch you here?
With your woman on her back, get as close as you can, this usually
means draping her legs over your thighs, as if you want to lock your genital
areas together. (If you want to be naked, then go ahead, in case clothing is
chaffing, or getting in the way). Start by putting one hand on her heart
chakra (just at the middle of her breast bone – a chakra is an energy point)
and let the fingers of your other hand caress her inner thighs, working your
way to her labia (lips).
What do you notice here? Can you smell her? Speak and create a
pleasure route map so she knows what to expect from you. Whisper, rather
than shout. Let her know in a voice that she is your queen and you will take
care of her. Make sure you are groomed and clean...especially your nails!
Nothing too long or too sharp! If you have long hair, tie it back so there’s
nothing in the way.
TRY THIS:
I adore you.
You make my heart full.
I am lucky to have you in my life.
Thank you for loving me.
I adore all that you are.
You are perfect to me.
Let me pleasure you.
She might be really wet and could feel embarrassed by “leaking” assure
her that there is nothing wrong (use towels if you are worried about the
sheets) her genitals will be engorged and may pulse awaiting your touch.
Listen to her, what sounds is she making? Please ensure that your
cell/mobile phones are out of reach and preferably on silent. This is YOUR
time...social media will be there when you finish! (My partner and I have a
small basket in the hallway where we leave our phones on silent. It means
they were truly out of the way).
TIME TO TOUCH TO HER
Use gentle, feather light stroke, passes and pressure. GO SLOW HERE –
NO EXCEPTIONS! As this will ramp up the pleasure in increasing
amounts and as hard as it might be, avoid the clitoris for now (she will
thank you later!) Also, you might be very aroused at this point, and that is
good! Show her how she makes you feel. And if you are getting aroused too
(perfectly normal and natural!), try the sentences below:
TRY THIS:
Look how you affect me.
Look at what your beauty does to me.
I am so hard just by looking at you.
I am so aroused by you.
I loved it when my partner would play with my pussy lips, stretching
them a little, moving them around. He would “hunt” for my clitoris with
focus...and sometimes he did it and maintained eye contact as he did so.
When he touched it or got close, he would use my facial cues or moans as a
homing beacon. He became an incredible interpreter of my body and you
are going to be able to do the same with your partner – just watch her...it
can be that easy!
Start with one finger and build from there, keep finger thrusts slow and
measured. Slow and go inch by inch. As you push your fingers in and out,
watch her (not her pussy). Keep eye contact for as long as you can. This is a
powerhouse move to create intimacy and a long lasting sense of closeness
long after you have left the bedroom. Always insert fingers with gentleness,
let her expand naturally. Is she holding her breath? Tell her it’s okay to
breathe, that you have her safe and secure. The goal here is to get her very
wet, bubbling with sexual need and the desire to come.
INTIMATE PUSSY MASSAGE TECHNIQUES
The plough
Using alternative fingers enter the pussy then use the other hand’s
fingers to enter the pussy. Swap them slowly, sensually and make her miss
your touch. Listen to what she’s saying, doing. Is her breath changing, her
moans getting louder, is she moving around a lot?
Rocking the boat
Using one hand, two fingers is best, insert them into the vagina and rock
them side to side, creating a semi circle shape that goes from east to west,
then west to east. (Imagine tracing half a circle, rather than going side to
side).
The full O
Just like the rocking the boat technique, do a 360 with your fingers.
Keep your moves slow and steady as if you are stirring a pot.
The G spot graze
Use your fingers to search upwards (upper wall of the vagina about an
inch or so in) and seek out a small bumpy region. She may squirt when this
spot is stimulated over long periods of time – so just watch her to see if this
might happen. Imagine the roof of her vagina is the sky and you are gently
parting the clouds.
Infinity
Trace the figure eight over her clitoris. Just use one fingertip, and
go....slow...this one can have explosive results. Watch her face for clues as
to how close she is to orgasm – if you want to deepen her orgasm, back off,
maybe play with her nipples or breasts, let her settle and start the tracing
again, edging her ever closer.
Mirror Dancer
Stand or have her sit (on the edge) of a chair in front of a large mirror.
You can kneel or sit before her, so that she can look at herself. (You can be
either in front or to the side, but in front works best as the reflection will be
just for her.)
This is almost akin to worshipping your goddess, and can make her feel
cherished, adored and safe. I recommended creating a haven in the room, so
candles, clean bedding for later and so forth. I was given one of my best
orgasms ever on Valentine’s Night when my partner put a chair at the foot
of the bed, undressed me and used the rock the boat and the full O
technique. And he did it without saying a word and kneeled in front of me
while I watched myself.
IF SHE HAS AN ORGASM...
Hold her in the moment; allow her to move, moan, and to let her fully
experience the sensation. You should keep your fingers inside (if you can’t
then that’s okay, let her be the guide), noting how she clenches around you.
Keep a finger or two (the pads of your fingertips of your other hand) against
her clit, this can result in multiple orgasms. Use a free hand to stroke her
nipples and breasts, her throat, down her breastbone, her belly.
IF SHE DOESN’T ORGASM...
Don’t panic, you have done nothing wrong! She may need more
stimulation, or she’s preoccupied by something. Just keep a loving space
open for her, like you have been doing.
TRY THIS:
Shall I change position?
Where do you want me?
How can I make you feel good?
Can I do more for you?
Do you want to take a break?
AFTER
Kiss. Make full body contact. Intercourse is perfectly okay, but not
necessarily the end goal as it was about the intimate pussy massage and her
pleasure. Embrace. Maintain eye contact. Let her sleep. You will get your
pleasure, either by your own hand, or by your goddess wishing to return the
feelings she has experienced (which is what usually happens between my
partner and I)...but she comes first – and she will know just what you’ve
done for her!
Don’t say “how are you feeling” or “how did I do?” This puts pressure
on her and whatever your experience was together was perfect as it was
(think about it, nothing is right or wrong, just our interpretation of it).
Silence can be worth so much and take your cues from there. Softly,
without words, allow her to recalibrate, for example running her a bath is a
wonderful way to close the time you’ve had together. Present her with
beautiful skin nourishing toiletries as an extra surprise for her to use. No
bath? Don’t worry, guide her to the shower and give her the amenities,
adding another layer of how much you wish to care for her.
MASSAGE JOURNEY MAP
Use these points as a handy reminder of what you’ve just learned. Some
extra tips have been placed in here for you.
Spend the day sending her sexy texts or saying sexy things to her in
normal, mundane settings.
It's often better to have the woman's legs draped over the man's
thighs, so that you are closer together. Get her to lay on her back for
best access.
You can start by caressing her breasts, nipples and collar bones (yes,
collar bones!) trace lightly, firmly, then softly, mixing up the
sensations, letting her tell you with the writhing of her body or her
vocal notes what is working or not. Remember, it's not a race; it's a
slow, soft accent into bliss.
Her belly is another beautiful area to work with, keep your strokes
light, soft and teasing as you work downwards.
Feel free to keep a hand at her breasts or belly as you work. Massage
her hips.
Offer her sensations with the lightest of touches, use the pads and tips
of your fingers, trace along her labia, her mons, even let your fingers
trail through her public hair (if any).
As challenging as it is, avoid the clitoris at this point - let it thrum and
hum and await your touch.
The intimate pussy massage should be done with care. She may still
be tense, or worried about her body, the noises she might make, or the
wetness. Reassure her vocally and with your touch. Eye contact here
is a beautiful way to connect.
Use your fingers to enter her. Use one, or two at first. Note the
wetness; is she wet enough? If not, try more external massage or
lubrication then return.
Avoid going hard and fast - keep your fingers light, soft, delicate and
let her show you (writhing of the body or with words) how things are
progressing. Touch her with sureness but with utter care. You have
been offered a precious gift! But go slow!
Use one or more of the techniques described above. Go in order, out
of order, whatever feels good and right to you and to her.
Crook your fingers to locate the G Spot on the upper wall of her
vagina. Stimulating this could result in female ejaculation (squirting)
so be mindful.
Allow the sensations to build - a wonderful way to do this is by gently
removing the fingers, and resuming external intimate pussy massage
before re-inserting.
Tell her how she makes you feel – use some of the sentence
suggestion mentioned earlier.
Touch her clit with your thumb (same hand as the fingers that are
inserted into her pussy) and gently, with a feather light touch, stroke
it.
Allow your partner to orgasm if it's coming - if not, don't rush, keep
massaging and caressing. Check in with her vocally if she needs a
break.
If your partner orgasms, then hold them through it, keep your fingers
tucked inside her pussy, so you can feel her channel clenching.
After, let her rest. She might be sleepy. You can run her bath; let her
have some time to recalibrate.
BONUS MATERIAL 1
GIFTING HER PLEASURE OUTSIDE A BEDROOM
SETTING
Get her wet by reading a sexy novel to her.
Touch her breasts through her clothes.
Play with her nipples through her clothes.
Choose sexy lingerie for her to wear under her work clothes.
Look at her naked and say one, heartfelt thing to her about her body
or the experience you are about to share. Your skin is radiant. Your
eyes are beautiful. I can’t wait to pleasure your gorgeous pussy.
Take a personal day and treat yourself and her to some self love...go
to the cinema, stop at a coffee shop, go home and play in the bath, in
the shower or in bed...wherever you like. Just keep it joyful, sexy and
fun.
Communicate to her how much you want to pleasure her!
Give her a silly gag gift that will make her laugh. (This is something
my partner does, and it’s so great!)
Put a love note in her wallet.
Buy food from her favorite place and pack it up for her lunch the next
day (for work, or even if she works from home, or doesn’t currently
work – it’s the thought that counts here).
Put a love note in her shoe – weird, but fun!
When naked together, use her back as a “chalkboard” and write
messages with the tip of your finger and ask her to decipher them!
(spell out the sentences written in this book).
BONUS MATERIAL 2
THE GAME CHANGER
WRITE HER AN EROTIC LETTER
This is one of the best things my partner ever did for me. It was so
unexpected and so out of the blue that I simply had to include it in the book
for you as a gift.
A hand written, mailed letter arrived for me one morning. I opened it and it
was from my partner. He had written me an erotic love note, where he
detailed what he was going to do to me, how he was going to pleasure me,
and when...he set a date within the week and every day he would text or
whisper little reminders of what was in the letter.
We were not intimate for the rest of the week...and the anticipation was
something else. I was aroused all the time and would get a giddy thrill when
he sent a text or spoke to me.
Whilst the letter he sent is a dear thing I keep close to my heart (and the
other letters since then!), below is a template that you can adapt for your
own letter or simply copy it down in your own hand.
It was the most erotic, sensual and romantic moment. And it went on for a
week!
And yes...it’s to be hand written! Not typed or emailed...HAND
WRITTEN!
Dear beautiful one,
On Wednesday night of next week, I’m going to take care of you. I’m going
to pleasure you, make you wet and put all my attention on giving you
orgasm after orgasm. I want you to know how much I adore you, what you
mean to me and how much I love pleasuring you.
I want you to be ready for me, so no touching yourself and we’re not going
to intimate until that night. I know it sounds difficult, but my goddess, I
want to ensure that you receive all the sexual pleasure I can deliver.
I am going to use my hands to touch you, tease you. I will put my fingers
inside of you and get you ready for pleasure. I want you to know that your
body, just as it is, is beautiful to me. You are perfect.
I can’t wait to lavish my love on you.
Yours.
CONCLUSION
I hope this eBook has helped you in feeling confident, sexy and sure
about your own power on how to please your woman sexually. It really can
start simply, from your hands. Remember, her pleasure is always the goal,
you will get yours!
When I started this journey with my partner, I had no idea how close it
would bring us, in and out of the sheets. Communication is key, so talk
things through with your partner. I love being adored this way, and I usually
pleasure my partner back in inventive ways too…it feels natural and right to
be so “naked” with him.
You can do this.
Good luck!
LEGAL DISCLAIMER
No part of this eBook may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or
by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording
or by any information storage and retrieval system, without written
permission from the author. The information provided within this eBook is
for general informational purposes only. While we try to keep the
information up-to-date and correct, there are no representations or
warranties, express or implied, about the completeness, accuracy, reliability,
suitability or availability with respect to the information in this eBook for
any purpose. Any use of this information is at your own risk.
The methods describe within this eBook are the author’s personal
thoughts. They are not intended to be a definitive set of instructions. You
may discover there are other methods and materials to accomplish the same
end result.
This book is not intended to be a substitute for the medical advice of a
licensed physician. The reader should consult with their doctor in any
matters relating to his/her health. All activities mentioned here are for
consenting adults.
You may adapt the erotic love letter or copy it down word for word.
Please do not share it electronically. Copyright remains with author in
perpetuity, along with all material within this eBook.