Chu 1 Monica Chu Ms. Judith Camille Rosette ARTS 1 WFU-1 4 Jan 2023 A Journal: A Window to the Soul Most people keep a journal. Many use a journal as a tool of catharsis to let out their daily frustrations, or really, anything that lingers on their minds. However, many things or situations are used as tools for catharsis. Despite all the collective grief and pain present today, things like venting to someone close to you privately airing out disheartened sentiments, and unsaid words, or simply documenting your days and immortalizing them on paper keep us human. Since the beginning of time, humans have had the urge to immortalize themselves, one way or another, to let the world know that they have been there. To some extent, this is true for wanting to capture a moment in our lives, mostly privately in a journal, and physically keep that moment suspended in time. Despite how there are other existing active experiences of creation, including filming videos or taking photographs, writing is a unique experience separate from making a film or taking a photograph. Writing is very much focused on the internal, while the latter, i.e. taking a photograph, is much more focused on the external. The experience of writing is like no other. Finding a blank page of paper to write on, possibly briefly stumbling onto past journal entries in the process, recalling your thoughts, trying to grasp onto the ideas and memories that are going through your mind space, writing these thoughts down, and possibly hesitating on what wording to use to properly articulate what you mean versus how it comes off—this is all part of the writing process, especially journaling. There is a reason why humans invented journals and Chu 2 notebooks. This is because we are naturally drawn to the idea of collecting our ideas and observations of any given day, experience, or event and putting these happenings into writing. We navigate this world with certain misunderstandings and frustrations, and journaling is one of many ways that help us better understand ourselves, our morals, and our past experiences, both triumphs and losses, amongst other things. For myself, a journal can temporarily disconnect me from the outside world and look within. There is a certain sensation that is irreproducible when you are in a moment where you feel like you are on the verge of shouting, crying, laughing, or losing control that you have to let it out onto a page. The way someone’s style of writing can perfectly capture what they are feeling at that exact moment is something to marvel at. Someone’s life seen through their journal entries can be wildly different from how you may know that person when they are in a work environment or even a casual environment. A journal holds a person’s most private, intimate, and vulnerable version of themselves. It holds a version of a person where it is truly and wholly them, rather than the person that they present to the world, or perform as, including their fears, secrets, thoughts, and much more. However, a question that may come to mind is, how is journaling in a physical journal different from a digital journal, for instance, on some form of a notes/journaling application available on mobile devices and laptops? For one, the physical experience of grabbing a pen and writing is gone. Typing using a keyboard, whether on a phone or a laptop, is different from writing. Physically writing something down takes much more time. This may allow more time to reflect on one’s thoughts and what one intends to write. It is also much easier to get rid of errors in a digital journal. People are much more susceptible to making mistakes while physically writing. With that, a journal may come with erasures, crossed-out passages, or pages fully scribbled out or ripped out, leaving a physical representation of what was written but then taken Chu 3 aback by the writer. Leaving little, usually spontaneous notes on a physical journal is quite common. Things like including statements between sentences if the writer forgot to write them at the moment or made a lapse in judgment, or adding notes on the sides of past journal entries to reflect on a certain time of your life that may have been full of love and joy or despair and loneliness. However, we are not always the most reliable narrators of our lives. There are journal entries that can capture certain moments where you let sentimentality and personal feelings wash over rationality and the reality of the situation. Historically, journals have always been a common tool and object used in day-to-day life. The first personal journal entries that were consistently introspective date back to the 10th century, specifically diaries written by the ladies of the royal Japanese court. Cited from the article, Diary Writing Turns a New Leaf, documents an excerpt from the century-old diary, “I wish I could be more adaptable and live more gaily in the present world - had I, not an extraordinary sorrow - but whenever I hear delightful or interesting things, my yearning for a religious life grows stronger. I become melancholy and lament. I try to forget, for sorrow is vain. Am I too sinful? So I was musing one morning when I saw waterfowl playing heedlessly in the pond.” This journal entry is more than a thousand years old, billions of people have lived their lives since then. Yet, as I read this journal entry, I thought about how I also experienced a yearning for a more beautiful life, experiencing melancholy, and regretting that negativity as it may waste my time or come off as vain. I think back to this diary entry written by a Japanese lady from a completely different time and empathize with her or even relate to her. The way that humans tend to pour their hearts out when writing is something that will forever stand the test of time, whether you are referring to a Japanese lady from the 10th century or a person living in 2023. This excerpt stunned me as I tend to forget that, no matter what point of history you are in, Chu 4 humans have always been humans and it will remain that way until humanity ceases to exist. Journal entries humanize us, other people, and historical figures that we have no connection to in any way whatsoever. The pandemic brought many new things, feelings, and events and disrupted many things in our lives that used to be routine. Based on my observations, I believe journaling has become more common to practice during and after the pandemic, or, at least the worst of the pandemic. 2020 was an unprecedented time in history when the track of our lives shifted. Many people were forced to stay inside, leaving them alone with nothing but their thoughts. For many, coping with this new lifestyle was isolating and created difficulties in coping, motivation, inspiration, maintaining relationships, and many other things. There are very few moments where humanity is completely united on one thing, and miraculously, 2020 and the pandemic somehow connected every single one of us. Many of us carry stories, memories, and moments from historical events like the pandemic, and are immortalized on paper. These pieces of paper in a journal will carry that moment as if the moment and page merge into one. To peel back the layers of your skin to reveal your heart and put that onto paper is an experience one has had at least once in their life. Whether it is going through a global pandemic, a friendship of yours experiencing a rough patch, or coming back from a beautiful date, these journals allow those moments to stay frozen in time. It is peculiar how we perceive memory and nostalgia as well as journaling. I would say that nostalgia is dangerously powerful. This bittersweet feeling can paint reality in much brighter and lovelier hues while reality might be pale compared to what we remember something as. Moments are fleeting, we actively pass in time and create memories constantly. However, to document those moments in a journal allows us to reflect and possibly reminisce. I look back on my journal entries and laugh when I see my past self so irrevocably sucked into a certain feeling. Chu 5 To include an outside perspective in this essay, I asked a close friend of mine what journaling means to them. To quote, “Journaling for me is it feels like a playing field for my thoughts. I can write about what I think, but also the things I want to happen. Writing and journaling are a mix of different things. It feels so freeing. I always feel at ease after. Being able to account for what I feel and what bothers me is easier to decipher when I have to try to figure out what I need to fix or think about more by myself.” It is interesting to see what journaling can mean to different people and how it can hold a different perspective when it comes to every person. For one person, a journal could mundanely be a way to remember things, i.e. if a given day was good or not. For another person, a journal could be a place where, like I mentioned previously, is a platform where they can let their soul speak. One thing is for sure and that is, no matter what a journal could mean to someone, each journal is unique to the owner, and our experiences, though maybe common and mundane, will never belong to anybody else nor be forgotten, so cherish the moment… and possibly write it down. Word count: 1608 Chu 6 Works Cited “DIARY WRITING TURNS A NEW LEAF (Published 1981).” The New York Times, 2023, www.nytimes.com/1981/11/08/magazine/diary-writing-turns-a-new-leaf.html.
