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Dr. Joe Vitale and Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. individually or corporately, do not accept any responsibility for any liabilities resulting from the actions of any parties involved. www.miraclescoaching.com 2 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Table of Contents Introduction Secret Session #1 Secret Session #2 Secret Session #3 Secret Session #4 Secret Session #5 Secret Session #6 Secret Session #7 Secret Session #8 Secret Session #9 Secret Session #10 Secret Session #11 Secret Session #12 www.miraclescoaching.com 3 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Expect Miracles! An Introduction by Dr. Joe Vitale For more than four years now I have been answering questions from students in my famous Miracles Coaching™ program. They've asked everything from – * How do I stay positive when people around me are negative? * How do I discover my life purpose when I don't know what I want? * How do I attract money in this terrible economy? * How do I attract my soulmate? * How do I improve my self-image? * How do I help others? * What can I do when everything looks hopeless? Those questions – and hundreds of others – have been asked every month for years. I often got on the secret coaching calls with no idea what I would say, but always felt like inspiration led me in answering each question in the most enlightening way. We recorded all those calls, of course. And one day I realized that people not yet in my Miracles Coaching™ program might benefit from my answers. Now, for the first time ever, you can have access to the first volume of questions and answers in my brand new e-book, The Miracles Manual, which you are now reading. www.miraclescoaching.com 4 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. I believe you will be entertained, educated, and enlightened from just reading this book. Please read, enjoy, and – Expect Miracles! Love, Joe Dr. Joe Vitale Creator of Miracles Coaching™ Author of way too many books to list here Member BBB 2003-1013 www.JoeVitale.com www.miraclescoaching.com 5 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Secret Session #1 Joe Vitale with Kory Koontz Kory: Joe, welcome. Joe: Thank you, Kory. I’ve been looking forward to this. Kory: Let’s jump right in with a question you probably get all the time, “What if I don’t know what I want?” How do you respond to this? Joe: One time I had coffee with Robert Anthony, who’s written a lot of successful material over the years, and asked him the same question. He said, “I tell them they’re lying.” So that’s exactly what I do today when people say that. The further explanation is that we easily deceive ourselves. Self-sabotage is rampant, but we don’t usually know it. We blame it on other people, our upbringing, society – everybody, but ourselves. The people who say they don’t know what they want are lying because it’s an easy way to dodge taking responsibility and action. As soon as you say what you want, you have to do something about it. For example, as soon as you admit, “Well, I’ve always wanted to open that doughnut shop. I’ve always wanted to open my own dry cleaning place. I’ve www.miraclescoaching.com 6 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. always wanted to write my own book. I’ve always wanted to create my own music. I’ve always wanted to sing. I’ve always wanted to dance. I’ve always wanted to be a lawyer,” you have to face the stark reality of what you’re going to do about it, or why you haven’t. For most of us, it’s easy to simply skirt the issue, shrug our shoulders, and say, “I don’t know what I want.” Essentially, it’s a cop out. In coaching, I play little games with people and ask them to imagine possibilities. For example, drift back to when you were a kid and ask yourself, “What did I really like to do? What kind of play was it? What did I dream about being when I grew up?” This starts to unearth answers. You can play with other ideas, too, like if you won the lottery. I’m not into gambling, so I’m not telling people to try to win it. I’m just playing with the idea that if you suddenly had millions of dollars drop in your lap, paid all your bills and taxes, bought all the toys – what are you going to do with your life now? It takes away the survival excuse that people have when they say, “Well, I can’t do what I really want because I need to pay my bills.” That’s just another excuse. We’re deceiving ourselves when we do that because, underneath our tiny little smokescreen, which isn’t all that thick, we do know what we want. We just haven’t allowed ourselves the permission to admit it, because as soon as we admit it, we’ve got to do something about it. We’ve got to go for it and stop making excuses. Just as I did in the movie, “The Secret,” I lean forward, get in your face, and say, “Look, let’s be ruthlessly honest with ourselves. You know what you want. What you need to do is admit it to yourself and, from there, we can devise a plan. It can be a really easy, baby step of a plan to move forward and bring it into being.” www.miraclescoaching.com 7 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. So, begin with the reality that you do know what you want, that it’s right under the surface of your excuses. That’s where you start. Kory: You wanted to learn how to play an instrument, or learn how to sing – which you’ve done over the last couple of years. In fact, you have a recently released CD called Blue Healer. In order to do this, you had to overcome your own limiting beliefs in regard to your talents. What did you do to get past the fears and “What if’s?” Joe: There’s something big going on with the music, but what’s important to understand is that, before I got started, I didn’t call myself a musician. I hadn’t written a single song, and could only play a few chords on the guitar. I’d never sung anything, except maybe in the choir when I was growing up in grade school. This came about because I admitted to myself that one of the things I wanted in my life was to be a musician. I wanted to create my own music and see what I could do with it. I admitted it, which is one of the first steps. Next I got support – coaches for vocal, guitar, and music – and having these helped me polish my skills fairly rapidly. Then, last October, I ran into a famous singer/songwriter, Ray Wiley Hubbard, who’s on the same level as Willie Nelson. He’s well-known, and knew of me, but we hadn’t met before. We happened to be at the same restaurant, so we sat down together. I couldn’t believe the synchronicity. www.miraclescoaching.com 8 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. As we got to talking, he asked, “Are you a musician?” and I remember thinking to myself, “How do I answer that?” I thought, “Well, the reality is that I am. I haven’t recorded a thing yet, but I’ve already committed to recording and I am taking lessons. I’ve got my coaches lined up.” So I looked him right in the eye and said, “Yes, sir. I am.” Three months later, I came out with my first CD, Blue Healer, and ended up on the cover of a local magazine. Immediately I said, “Well, now I’m going for the big one, the one that is all me – my own singing and guitar playing.” Blue Healer had been more of an instrumental, a relaxing background effort. While it was a great accomplishment, I wanted to put myself on the line even more – with my own original music, guitar playing, and singing. By the end of the year, I’ll have three CDs out. As soon as Strut is done, I’ll be working on another with my guitar teacher, Matthew Dixon, a Spanish guitar player. When you admit what you want, you release all kinds of energy within you. Then, when you hire a coach, you gain an ally to help and instruct you, as well as someone who’ll hold you accountable. Did I have limiting beliefs or self-doubt? Absolutely. There were times when I thought, “What in the world am I doing?” Last February I signed up to go to a songwriting workshop that Ray Wiley Hubbard and Kevin Weltz were putting on. It was very informal, only five or six people for three or four days, and I almost didn’t go. Right up to that morning, I kept thinking to myself, “What am I doing? I’m not a singer. I’m not a songwriter.” But I looked at that and decided, “Wait a minute. This is how you learn.” I wrestled with some of my self-doubt on my own. I’ve been doing this for decades, so I’ve got a bag of tricks I can pull out of at any point. But I also know www.miraclescoaching.com 9 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. that we all need a coach, and one of the people who acted as a coach and helped me was Daniel Barrett, the lead singer of an Austin band called Porter Davis. One day I was in his studio, and he asked me to sing and play this song I was working on. I flubbed a couple lines and got as critical as someone can be of themselves. He stopped me and said, “What just happened?” I told him, “The Wrath of Khan just came into my brain and beat me up for what I did.” He would not let me play past it, so I had to address it – and I couldn’t go past it until I relaxed, accepted my efforts to learn, and was kind to myself. I realized I was learning as we were going. I can’t be expected to sing and play like Paul McCartney with his 60 years of experience. So the coaching was a dramatic breakthrough. In fact, we both felt the shift physically when it happened for me. We had to walk outside to get air, and talk about it, now a turning point. He helped me see this block, and walked me through an alternative way of looking at it. Once I let it go, my playing became even better and, of course, I enjoyed it more. It was a dramatic moment. It’s easy to self-sabotage when you don’t actually see what’s happening. We accept it as par for the course. This is why I think coaching is fundamentally priceless, and essential to any big thing we’re going for. We all need it on many levels. Kory: I’m glad you pointed that out because, at certain points in my life, I’ve thought, “Okay, I’ve reached a pinnacle and I’m fine now,” and then find myself back to old habits. That’s when I seek out a coach in the office. www.miraclescoaching.com 10 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. I continue to be a work in progress – so I’m really glad to hear that you still need help once in a while, too. Joe: Every one of us is a work in progress. The great goal of life is to awaken, but even when you awaken, you’re still in life. There will continue to be growth and challenges, things you may need to deal with. When we can settle into this moment with gratitude, looking around with appreciation, we do start to feel differently, but that doesn’t mean we’re done. For example, I still have inspired goals coming up from the Divine through me, and I want to act on them. I can’t sit here and say, “Well, I’ve got nothing else to do, nothing else to learn, and nothing else to grow through.” That’s not the human experience. The big takeaway here is to realize that, “Yes, this moment is perfect, and yes, I still have work to do.” Kory: When you created Blue Healer, what did you feel was its main purpose? What were you hoping that people would use it for, or get out it? It’s very refreshing and relaxing. Joe: The main purpose is to help people clear whatever is keeping them from this moment – a perception, stress, a limiting belief, a physical pain – any unconscious issues that they might feel, but aren’t able to express. The goal of Blue Healer is to relax, soothe, and heal. www.miraclescoaching.com 11 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. People who seem to use it the most are massage therapists, and people into yoga or Pilates, to help their clients de-stress. I’ve even heard from people who listen to it while they’re driving that they just breathe easier. They relax, but remain aware and alert. If people are interested in getting a feel for it, they can hear a 5 – 10 minute mix sampler at the Blue Healer website, www.healingmojomusic.com. Kory: Speaking of reducing stress, or clearing limiting beliefs, what would you say to someone who says, “How can I turn my husband around from being so negative?” Joe: My first response is to be an inspiration to your partner. In other words, if you’re thinking or saying out loud that your partner is negative, they’re most likely going to react negatively to you because that’s being critical. Nobody likes to be criticized or feel less than perfect. When you’re saying someone’s negative, they feel and sense it, and if you’re talking out loud, they may be hearing it. My best advice is, “Don’t try to change anybody. Instead, work on you and be an inspiration to the people around you.” If you do that, it won’t be long before your husband will start saying, “I wonder what she’s doing. She seems to be happy all the time and getting healthier.” Or, “She seems to be getting more of the results that she was going for.” Eventually, he’ll ask, “What exactly is happening here? What are you reading? www.miraclescoaching.com 12 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. What are you doing? What are you popping? Who are you talking to?” He’ll get curious. Also, look at why you think he’s negative. People do the best they can based on their upbringing and beliefs, and what he needs from you is love and total acceptance. So don’t try to change anybody – change yourself. This ties into the Hawaiian healing process of Ho’oponopono, from my book, Zero Limits, which says there’s nobody, nothing, outside of you. What you perceive is your reflection. When you look at your husband and say, “He’s negative,” you’re saying that a part of you is negative. For most people, when they first hear this, it doesn’t make sense. They wrestle with it and don’t like it, because it means they have to take responsibility for what they see in somebody else. Dr. Hew Len, my co-author and the man who taught me Ho’oponopono, has this great line, “Have you ever noticed whenever there’s a problem, you’re always there?” He’s pointing out that, not only are you part of the problem, you attracted it – because it’s actually you, and coming from you. The world is a mirror, reflecting what you believe about the world itself. If you look out and see your husband being negative, you’ve got to take that in and go, “Some part of me is being negative. I’m projecting it into the world and it’s being reflected back to me through my husband.” This is the deeper healing – it’s not about healing him. That’s like trying to put your makeup on by looking in the mirror, but putting the makeup on the mirror. That’s not going to help you. You have to look at yourself, and question your beliefs. This is when a Miracles Coach can make a difference. You can also clean and clear it by saying the phrases, “I love you. I’m sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you.” You’re not saying them to your husband. You say www.miraclescoaching.com 13 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. it inside yourself to your connection with all that is – some call God, or the Divine. You’re saying to God, “Please erase this program within me,” not, “erase it in my husband.” This is how Dr. Hew Len helped heal an entire ward of mentally ill criminals in Hawaii, where he worked for four years. He didn’t try to change the patients because their therapists had already tried that and it didn’t work. At that point, the patients were being sedated and shackled. Nothing was working. As a last resort, the hospital brought in this unusual therapist and said, “Do whatever you want because nothing else is working.” So he did Ho’oponopono. He’d look at the patients, or their files, and feel whatever emotion came up – repulsion, anger, shame. He didn’t try to change the patient, only the feeling that was keeping him from the clarity of the moment. He repeated the four phrases internally, “I love you. I’m sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you,” saying them over and over, in any order. As he kept doing that, the patients started to get better. So we’re not trying to heal a husband. What we’re trying to do is clear up a program, a negative belief, in the person who perceives it in the other. Kory: Sometimes that’s a hard pill to swallow, although you’ve also said we’re not to blame for it. Yes, we attracted it, but it’s not good or bad. Joe: That’s important because when people react, they’re usually reacting to the idea of total responsibility. And most of us don’t want that. www.miraclescoaching.com 14 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. It’s so much easier to point to other people and say, “No, it’s my husband’s fault. It’s not me.” But the thing to realize is that this is not about guilt, blame, or shame – it’s about personal empowerment and awakening. When you take back your power and say, “Okay, the world is of my making, and what I’m seeing here is actually a clue to what I believe,” you can get a handle on changing it. This is where coaching can help, because you have somebody outside of your brain, outside of your mental belief system, to help you see what you’re believing in the moment. If somebody’s attracting things they don’t necessarily care for, they don’t need to beat themselves up – they just need to become aware of the belief that’s attracting what they don’t care for. Change the belief and you get a different result. Kory: That’s a perfect segue to my next question. Can you talk about the idea, or technique, of diving into your feelings? Joe: When we bury a feeling, we bury it alive – meaning that if people don’t express, investigate, or release a feeling, it gets submerged in our body/mind system, what some people will call our unconscious mind. This is okay as a temporary measure. We’ll get through the day, but the bad news is that it usually resurfaces, and sometimes in an inappropriate way, for example, when somebody blows up. They lose it and start screaming at their partner, their kids, or somebody at work. And it’s because that emotion was suppressed. Whatever you’re feeling is totally fine. We’re human and we have www.miraclescoaching.com 15 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. feelings. But rather than dismiss any of them, we want to learn from them. Feelings can be an entryway into a belief system that actually needs to be changed. For example, if you repeatedly have road rage and are easily upset, you don’t want to deny, or suppress, the feeling. Instead, ask yourself, “Where did that feeling come from?” because underneath the feelings are beliefs which trigger the emotions. You become aware of it by stopping and taking the time to figure out what it is. It could be anything, such as “I deserved my right of way,” or “This always happens to me. They always cut me off. They always do these negative things.” Thoughts like this cause you to have outbursts – but notice that the outburst doesn’t happen in isolation. It happens because something triggers it, often from a previous experience years before, like the first time you learned to drive. For example, when I started driving, I was stiff, extremely cautious, and gripped the steering wheel like it was going to run off. If you’re like that and suddenly another driver pulls out in front of you, you have to do something to express the emotion. Otherwise, in that moment you can lock onto it – and continue to recreate it throughout the rest of your driving career. So for the next 60 years, whenever somebody pulls out in front of you, you relive that first moment. But you won’t know this unless you pause, express the feeling, look for the trigger and any underlying belief – maybe back to the first cause. When you do that, you can release it forever. Kory: It’s like a metaphor of taking a deep dive in the pool, “Let’s go down to the bottom and see where that originally comes from.” www.miraclescoaching.com 16 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Joe: Some people get nervous, thinking, “Oh, I’m going into the deep, dark molasses, the quicksand of my mind,” but it’s not like that at all, especially if you work with your Miracles Coach. In fact, thinking the unconscious is scary is just another belief. It’s not dark. It’s not quirky. It’s not scary. It’s just below the surface and you can look at it by calling it forth. Kory: You don’t have to relive it – just acknowledge it. Joe: Even if you did relive the memories, you’re doing it from the comfort of your chair at home. You’re not in traffic, so you’re not really reliving it, anyway. It’s safe. Kory: And it doesn’t have to take a long time, sometimes a few minutes. Let’s move on to another technique you’re known for, Nevillizing. Does Nevillizing push you to achieve other goals faster? Joe: It doesn’t push you, but it convinces you that other goals can be achieved, and, because you’re convinced those other goals can be achieved, you’re now www.miraclescoaching.com 17 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. taking down any barriers to making things happen faster. That’s the great beauty of all of this. Once you start clicking along, for example, you’ve got your first music CD finished, then the next one comes along even more quickly because you’ve removed all the blocks. You’ve paved the way for things to happen faster. So when somebody starts Nevillizing, you’re imagining the result you want as already having come to pass. It’s already here. Neville used to say, “Assumption will harden into fact.” What he meant was to assume the reality you would like to experience. Assume that it’s already real. Walk as if it’s real. Feel as if it’s real. Close your eyes and know that it’s real. You send this signal to the universe. And before you know it, you’re a whole new being interacting with the universe, and it starts to come to you. When it happens the first time, you’ll be convinced of the power, and, from that point on, anything you Nevillize happens even faster. You’ve convinced yourself it works. Kory: Is this why, after your first CD, the rest have come so quickly? Joe: It happens in every field. It’s probably no accident I’ve written 50+ books. The first one or two, there’s a learning curve. As I keep doing it, and continue growing and changing inside, it becomes a no-brainer. There’s still effort. I’ve got to sit down and www.miraclescoaching.com 18 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. actually write, but it’s not the kind of work that people think of when they think of work. It’s more like joyful play and self-expression. In every area I’ve turned to, once I’ve pulled away the blocks and limitations and gotten the first sign or taste of success, it started to get faster. It’s probably why people marvel at my life and ask, “How in the world have you accomplished so much?” Well, I’m just doing what I know to do and there is nothing in me stalling. There’s nothing in me saying, “You can’t do this. You’re not the right person for this.” Or, “You don’t have the time for this.” Those are all excuses. There are so many stories of people who have accomplished great things without money, education, experience, or connections. We can go through the whole list. People have accomplished mind-boggling things with less than nothing to begin with, a testament to the fact that you can achieve virtually anything. I don’t know what limits are any more – I can’t imagine them. The sky’s not even the limit. As you keep Nevillizing, all the limits disappear and you find yourself in this magical universe where miracles are the norm. Kory: Isn’t that what Zero Limits is all about? Joe: Yes. Kory: www.miraclescoaching.com 19 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. You have to take a breath to take all of that in. It seems like every time I turn around, there’s another book on my desk you’ve written. Someone will say, “Joe’s got another one.” And I think, “Already?” Joe: I slowed down a couple of years ago because my readers would write and say, “Look, we love you and we love your books, but we can’t keep up.” So I thought, “Okay, I won’t come out with a book-of-the-month club. I’ll slow down.” Kory: So to have the life we want, we have to get clear in our unconscious mind, rather than the conscious. One of my students recently asked, “How do you make changes directly from the conscious into the unconscious, and how do I know I’m doing that?” How would you answer that? Joe: The underlying assumption in that question is that the unconscious and conscious mind is divided – like the unconscious is one floor of a building and the conscious another, separate from each other, but it’s not that way. If there is a line, it’s blurry, like an aquarium where the top level is clear water, and towards the bottom less so – but it’s all water. With any technique, when you enter through the conscious mind, you’re entering the top level, and very quickly, you’re talking to the unconscious mind. It’s not like you’re talking to an www.miraclescoaching.com 20 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. animal locked-away in the lower area of a building. This is our mind – and our unconscious is readily available. If I ask you, “What was your telephone number when you were growing up?” the answer is not in your conscious mind – it’s in your unconscious mind. But as soon as I ask the question, it bubbles up quickly from the unconscious mind because they’re not separate. You can answer it, even though it wasn’t floating around in your conscious mind until I asked the question. Also, when we use any of these techniques, even simple dialogue, you’re entering and making changes in the unconscious mind. When I asked the question about the phone number you had growing up, the answer came up because of the dialogue. I asked the question and the answer pops up from you. Any technique is the entry point to start working, even a conversation with your Miracles Coach, and going to make changes in the unconscious mind. Sometimes people think they need to go deeper, and ask me about hypnosis, which I’m certified in. People think, “I’m going to go into a deep hypnotic trance, and then I’ll be able to mess with my unconscious” but that’s not what happens. While hypnosis can be useful, the traditional experience of hypnosis is similar to what you feel when you close your eyes, take a few deep breaths, and relax. This is a light form of hypnosis, where you’re totally aware of everything going on. A part of you might even think, “Well, nothing’s happening. I don’t feel like this is hypnosis at all.” That’s okay, it is happening – your unconscious mind is alive and well, and you can talk directly to it. The fact is, though, you can also talk to it over the phone with a Miracles Coach, and that’s the great joy in all of this. The point is there’s no real separation. The conscious mind is easily available – even as it’s trying to handle 12 bits of www.miraclescoaching.com 21 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. information at any given time. It’s always right there, and you call it forth with the right question. So any technique reaches the unconscious and does its work there – because it’s not hidden, or hiding. Kory: You’ve mentioned listening to “bubbling” thoughts, and to always make note of them, because manifestation is already within us. If we’re willing to listen, it’s like, “Boom, here’s the next step.” Joe: Yes, it’s true, and I’ve been learning that in music, too. My producer, Daniel Barrett, tells me, “Go ahead and free associate.” We call it “popcorning.” When something pops in my mind, or his mind, we honor that and say whatever it is – even if I’m listening to a song and see a blue elephant. We honor whatever shows up because we don’t know where it might lead, and we want to trust the process. The unconscious might just bubble up a few things that we’ll want to use – and it’s okay either way. A great deal of trust is involved in order to get to the results we want. Kory: Talking about trust, that’s the first and foremost relationship we try to establish in Miracles Coaching™. Joe: www.miraclescoaching.com 22 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. When you feel trusting and safe, you can go ahead and talk about anything. You can let things arise and easily remove them. Trust is the first level of importance. Kory: You often use a phrase, “What if up?” Could you share an example of how you went from a space of not-so-great energy to “What if up?” and what that did for you? Joe: A friend of mine, Mindy Audlin, taught it to me. In fact, I wrote the foreword for her book, What If It All Goes Right? Most of us do “What if down?” We get an idea and say, “What if it doesn’t work? What if I lose all my money on it? What if this is a waste of time? What if this is not a good investment? What if I beat myself up for the rest of my life?” This is all the negative stuff. “What if up?” takes you in the other direction. “What if this is the greatest idea ever? What if this changes my life forever? What if this is the turning point? What if this is the greatest investment in my life?” You can literally feel your energy shift. Your mind opens and more creativity comes in when you play the “What if up?” game. My music is a great example. As I mentioned, last October I didn’t call myself a musician. I finally stood my ground at the beginning of this year and said, “I am a musician and I am going to do my first CD.” When I said it, my intent was www.miraclescoaching.com 23 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. to come out with a CD by December. I allowed myself one full year to learn what I needed – to practice singing, write the music, play the guitar, and get it produced. Suddenly a publisher showed up in my life and said, “I want to put you on the cover of the local magazine. It can be for whatever you want.” I started to play with, “What if up?” thinking, “What if I could get my CD done fast enough to be on the cover of the magazine? What if I can get the people I need to help me – my vocal coach, my guitar coach, the producer – what if I can get them all to agree to help me?” Then I thought, “What if I could help some of the people who are helping me produce their own CDs within the same period of time? What if I were on the cover and I write the feature story and I include these other people and their CDs?” This was a way of thanking them and creating a win/win/win, my favorite way of doing business. I want everybody to win. Next, I thought, “What if I can get this CD done in a few months? Would it actually be possible? I can’t do it in January. It’s virtually impossible, maybe February.” All this started to put stress on me, which I don’t like. I want to be able to lift the bar and stretch, but I don’t want to give myself a heart attack. I want to be able to enjoy the process. So I thought, “What about March? Yes, I think I can do March.” I went to the publisher and said, “Put me on the cover of the April issue for my music. I’ll have my CD done, and two of my friends are going to have their CDs done. We’ll have them all done by the time your magazine comes out on April 1st.” He agreed. Then I talked to my friends, “What if we actually pulled this off? What if everybody created CDs and we were all in the magazine at the same time?” www.miraclescoaching.com 24 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Now keep in mind that, in this case, when I began “What if up?” I was giving myself 12 months to create a CD. But as I continued the process, it became three months – and on the last week of that March month, all three of us were handing each other our CDs. We had completed them all. I ended up on the cover of the magazine in April. I also wrote the feature article talking about my music debut, and I reviewed my CD and the other two CDs. I put all of that on the website and in my blog. We had a win/win/win, even the publisher. Kory: And you turned it into a miracle, fantastic. This is the perfect remedy anytime if you feel like you’re spiraling down. You can immediately turn it around by asking, “What if up?” instead. Just give it the opposite attention. It makes it exciting, rather than fearful. Joe: It does and it’s a fun thing to do – anytime and anyplace. I’ve even been doing it with my new CD. “What if I end up on the cover of Rolling Stone® magazine? What if I sell millions of copies and I end up on David Letterman, Jay Leno, and all these other talk shows, which causes millions more to sell? And what if I end up being a cover story that says, ‘This guy came out of nowhere. He’s a self-help author, internet marketer, and now he’s a rock and roll singer/songwriter. What’s up with him?’” As soon as you start doing this, your energy level changes. In fact, just doing it now, I feel like I could run a marathon. The energy in my body is exhilarating. www.miraclescoaching.com 25 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Whenever you “What if up?” it’s like turning on the afterburners. You’re adding more energy to what you’ve already got, and it becomes a blast just to think about. Kory: I’m feeling energized just listening to you. Let’s change gears and talk about money, something on everybody’s mind these days. In your book, Attract Money Now, you quote Arnold Patent, a spiritual advisor you had, who said that the sole purpose of money is to express appreciation. That’s quite different than the way most people think about it. Joe: Yes, Arnold Patent, who’s almost 90 years old now, said that in a book he wrote, called Money. When I came across that line, it stopped me in my tracks. I reread it several times, “The sole purpose of money is to express appreciation.” And I kept thinking, surely that’s wrong. There must be an exception to that – but I couldn’t think of one. Later, when I had the opportunity to interview him, I asked him about it, and he said, “Yes, expressing appreciation is the sole purpose of money. We think it’s just for buying things, or paying for things, but, in reality, if you look at the deeper spiritual, metaphysical, or psychological reason behind it, you’re really saying, ‘Thank you.’” This shifted my whole experience of paying bills. For example, in the past, I’d grumble about paying my phone bill, like most people. Now, when I pay it, I’m thinking, “Wow, I’m grateful to have a phone.” I can pay it innocently, without www.miraclescoaching.com 26 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. any charge on it. I do this with my utilities, as well, thinking, “I really enjoy having my computer powered. I enjoy having lights on at night, I enjoy watching TV.” This simple realization will transform your relationship with money – because you’re reframing your experience of how you use it, even when you buy “necessities.” As you write your checks, just remember that you’re saying, “Thank you.” I talk about this in my book, Attract Money Now, as the first step in a 7-step formula – getting clear about your relationship to money and yourself. Most people think money is negative, a necessary evil, when it’s actually neutral, meaningless. If you’ve ever been to a foreign country, you’ll understand what I mean. When you first see their money, it’s like getting play money. You look at it and think, “What is this?” In America, we’re brought up with the dollar bill, which means something to me, but other cultures have their own programming around money. When you strip it all away, you realize that it’s just paper and coins. It doesn’t mean anything in and of itself. So I love Arnold Patent’s quote because it gives positive meaning to money: The sole purpose of money is to express appreciation. I only wish I had come up with it, but I didn’t. Kory: Most people think in terms of scarcity when they’re paying bills, and say, “I don’t have any money left.” With this practice, they’re able to have a thought of abundance and the benefits that come with that thinking. Joe: www.miraclescoaching.com 27 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Yes, it takes you back into gratitude, which we both know is one of the most powerful ways to transform your life, and bring a miracle on in any moment. Kory: Even when you’re not in the best of places, you can think, “What is something that I can do to turn this into something else, something good?” Otherwise, negativity begets negativity. What advice would you give to people who often seem to get sucked into a negative vortex? Joe: One way is to interrupt the pattern. For example, decades ago when I didn’t have the tools I do now, I had a coach I made a verbal deal with. Whenever I felt myself drop into a downward spiral, I would notice it and call him, because I knew that would attract things I didn’t want. I wanted to break the pattern, so if it happened and I couldn’t pull myself out of it, I’d pick up the phone, talk to my coach, and get out of it. That’s the beauty of having someone like a Miracles Coach. For people doing it on their own, create a bag of tricks for yourself. Learn techniques and processes to help you, like “What if up?” Instead of using energy to pull yourself down, what if you can use it to pull yourself up? Play with different possibilities. I have plenty of information to support you in my books, audios, DVDs, blog, and on my main website – free articles, content podcasts, and video clips. And if it isn’t me, go to someone that really excites you, inspires you, or www.miraclescoaching.com 28 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. makes you laugh – online or off. The bottom line is, do something to break the cycle. The more you break it, the more things will turn around. At the very least, make a mental agreement, or even a physical one out loud with your Miracles Coach, that whenever you feel like this is happening, you’ll do something to stop it. When you start feeling like you’re falling out, or getting negative, do something to make the shift. There are many opportunities and tools available. Kory: I agree – if you want it, you can have it, anything you want to be, do, or have. Thank you, Joe, for sharing with us today. Joe: Thank you, Kory. God speed to all. www.miraclescoaching.com 29 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Secret Session #2 Joe Vitale with Gregory Downey Gregory: With tremendous gratitude, welcome, Joe. Joe: Thank you, Gregory. I’m glad to be here, and looking forward to lots of great questions. Gregory: I have plenty for you today. My first one is, have you ever been in a situation where you feel that something negative is stuck in your heart, but you can’t define it clearly? In other words, after diving into it and applying other tools, you weren’t able to get to the root of it? How do you get rid of something like this? Joe: Yes, I’ve been there, and I’m sure all of us have – and that’s okay. The good news is you don’t need to know the cause of whatever feeling is lodged in your heart, all you have to do is clean or clear it. Often people think, “I have to get to the root of it. I have to do some sort of Freudian psychoanalysis, and find out if it started when I was three years old, or after that.” It’s just not true. If you happen to have the story of it, and it gives insight on where an emotion came from, that’s interesting, but not where the real healing takes place. A www.miraclescoaching.com 30 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. story is just a story. Once you have the story you can re-write it and make a different one. The important lesson, though, is you don’t need to know where something came from, or even be able to articulate what exactly it is that’s bothering you. Just having that heaviness, emotional pain, or heartache – some sort of description of it – is all you need to begin the process of cleaning and clearing. To do this, I often use Ho’oponopono, the technique I describe in Zero Limits, where you say, “I love you, I’m sorry, please forgive me and thank you,” not to the ache, not to anyone, but to your connection to what I call the Divine. You might refer to it as something else – God, life, higher power, energy, intelligence, or the collective unconscious. Regardless of how you name it, what you’re doing is cleaning and clearing that feeling. That’s it. Other useful techniques include tapping (EFT), and talking with your Miracles Coach. It can be as simple as just allowing the feeling – wherever and whatever it is, without knowing anything about it. From there, you can begin the process of releasing it. Gregory: So just be aware of it, validate that it’s out of place, and then begin to clear it. Joe: Yes, it can be that simple. Too often people want to know where the feeling came from because they’re looking for a source to blame. But that’s not helpful, and certainly not part of www.miraclescoaching.com 31 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. healing. The healing that I teach, and that we focus on in Miracles Coaching™, is 100% responsibility for whatever is going on in your world – everything. If you’ve got it, you own it – regardless of how it came to be there. It’s your being, your life, your body, your mind, and your feeling. That’s 100% responsibility – and the first step. Gregory: Growing up, I had a good friend who used to borrow things of mine. Then, when I’d want it back, sometimes he’d be reluctant because he enjoyed having it. He used to say, “You know, possession is 9/10ths of the law.” Essentially he was telling me, “Hey, you’re not going to get it back because I have it now, so I own it.” I used to hate that saying, but now, as a Miracles Coach, it’s really appropriate. In fact, I actually wrote an article called “Possession is 9/10ths of the Law” about taking 100% responsibility. Instead of pointing the finger and complaining, or victimizing ourselves over it, once we see we have it and are willing to own it, then we can get rid of it – in that order. Joe: Yes, and another good title would be, “100% Possession of the Problem Leads to 100% Healing of It.” Gregory: www.miraclescoaching.com 32 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Is listening to a recording of Ho’oponopono as effective as saying it out loud, or thinking it? Joe: The short answer is no, it’s not going to be as effective. However, I don’t want people to dismiss it completely because it’s still useful to listen to a recording, whether it’s your voice, my voice, or somebody else’s. I have recordings for myself like this. For example, Pat O’Bryan and I created “clearing” audios – some subliminal and some audible – that have statements on them. They do help, but it’s more powerful when you do it yourself, either out loud, or internally, with focus and intention dedicated to doing the process and making a clearing. Gregory: Why is Ho’oponopono so effective? Is it because, when we use our own voice, we’re confessing and validating that we’re 100% responsible? Joe: Yes, you’re taking 100% responsibility, and you’re also 100% involved when it’s your voice, your chant, your thinking, your meditation, and your process. Again, I’m not dismissing the idea of listening to someone else doing it in the background, but if you want the full impact, 100% results, like I do, than you need to do it yourself. That’s where real transformation is. Gregory: www.miraclescoaching.com 33 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Do you have anything to say about the order in which the phrases are said? I’ve had some students say, “I just feel like the natural progression, or flow, should be this other way.” Joe: I asked Dr. Hew Len, the man who taught me this method and who coauthored Zero Limits with me, about this. He said to say it in the order that feels right to you. It doesn’t matter, regardless of how others do it. It needs to be in the order that you feel the flow with. I tend to say, “I’m sorry, please forgive me” as the opening statements. In this sense, I’m saying, “I’m sorry that I was unconscious to whatever it was that pulled the experience into my life; please forgive me for being unaware.” I’m beginning with an admission of, “I was off the mark, I wasn’t quite aware, I was sleepwalking, I wasn’t conscious.” Then I move into “Thank you” because I’m acknowledging gratitude. Gratitude is the single most powerful thing you can do to transform yourself in any moment, no matter where you’re at. When I say thank you, it’s an acknowledgement to the Divine for taking care of the problem. I end with the phrase “I love you” because it moves me into the highest vibration I can think of – one that will transmute anything going on that I perceived as a problem. Gregory: So there are four steps to the equation: Accepting 100% responsibility – I’m sorry. www.miraclescoaching.com 34 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Asking for forgiveness – Please forgive me. Expressing gratitude – Thank you. Expressing love – I love you. Joe: Yes, that’s the combination code that works for me, but find the one that works for you. Somebody else may want to start with “I love you” to jump right into the space of unconditional appreciation, and then move into the other phrases. It’s up to you and what you’re feeling in the moment, which can change from time to time. There’s no one right order. Gregory: What if someone’s moving into a new phase and wants more enlightenment and abundance, but none of the clearing methods are working? Joe: The thing to remember is they are working, even if you don’t see the immediate, visible result that you’re focused on. Often there’s a trust issue going on, especially when somebody’s saying, “Look, I’m doing these exercises, but they don’t seem to be working so I want to stop. I don’t see the end result so I doubt the whole thing. I no longer have trust in this process.” In other words, we’re trying to attract a specific result and when we don’t see it in front of us, we get upset and think, “This doesn’t work.” www.miraclescoaching.com 35 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. I asked Dr. Hew Len about this, and he said if you could see the layers of belief and programming being erased as you do this process, you would never question it or stop doing it. In this moment, what you have is a reflection of your past thoughts, feelings, beliefs, decisions, and actions. You manifested this moment, so own it and appreciate it. When you do, you won’t be looking around going, “Oh, I want a better moment.” Instead, you’ll be saying, “This moment is great, I love this moment, and I’m going to keep cleaning to make my next moments even better.” Gregory: So, like Wayne Dyer says, you’ve got to believe it before you see it, rather than the other way around. Joe: Yes, because the miracle you’re looking for is right here, in this moment. Just find something to be grateful for. I can look around and see any number of things, even the floor I’m standing on. Thank goodness I’ve got one here because I’m on the second floor of the building, and I would be collapsing or falling if it wasn’t here. Anybody can look around in their moment and find something, anything, to be grateful for – a pet, a person, their refrigerator, their phone, or a phone call. When you move into the experience of being grateful now, you realize you’re already in the miracle. This is the miracle. When you start waiting for something else to come into your life – and then you’ll be grateful – that’s selfwww.miraclescoaching.com 36 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. sabotage. You’ve tricked yourself into not appreciating the miracle that’s already at your feet. Almost everybody falls for the idea that, “When I get the better job, more income, the relationship, better health, a bigger house – then I’ll be happy.” But that’s a trick of the mind. As soon as you do get that bigger house, the person, or the income – whatever it was you were looking for – for a moment you’ll feel the elation, and then you’ll be looking down the street for more money, another relationship, or a bigger house. You’ll just fall into the mental trap again. Just be here in this moment, appreciating it. Keep cleaning and clearing as you proceed to create your future moments. And whatever you do, don’t fall for the mental trap that says, “This moment isn’t so great. Clearing must not be working, and everything I’m doing must not be working, because nothing’s changed.” Everything is changing. Everything is in constant motion. Right now as we’re speaking everything in the world is changing. True, we can’t see it all. Our conscious mind can barely perceive anything going on in any one minute anyway. It’s our unconscious mind that’s collecting all the data and that’s where we’re doing all the cleaning. Trust – because it is working. Gregory: You always encourage people to move up levels in their social status. Can you give us ideas for meeting people of like mind and goals, or moving into a higher socioeconomic group? Joe: www.miraclescoaching.com 37 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. I’ve written about it in some of my early books, and recently wrote about it again in my new book, Instant Manifestation. It can be as simple as rearranging your office. In other words, where you’re sitting, and what you have around you, is influencing your mental thought processes right now. When I look around in my office, I see success literature all around me – I still read it. I have books like Napoleon Hill’s classic, Think and Grow Rich, and brand new authors. I’m also reading about the neurosciences and neuroplasticity, and new concepts in changing our brain. We’re not our brain – we’re a power that can actually use our brain and change it. I continue to read, listen to audios, and use coaches to raise my own levels of success. A year ago I was not a musician – I had not written or sung a single song. Yet as of today, I have two CD’s on the market, and my first singing, songwriting CD being duplicated. How did I raise my status from being a non-musician to being a musician? First, I stated a clear intention to do it. Second, I told people I was a musician, even though at that point, I was just toying around on the guitar. Third, I started to surround myself with musicians, asking around and putting the word out that I wanted to sing and learn to play the guitar. Who could teach me these things? You can do the same thing in the business world. I’d say to join some of the networking clubs, like Rotary, or even a church group. You can start by looking online for networking groups in your area. Meetup.com is a great resource for groups like this. Attend a few and see if they’re for you. Here’s a million dollar tip, something that worked for me when I was a complete unknown living in Houston a few decades ago: I became a speaker who spoke for free. I started with the Rotary Clubs and business networking groups, www.miraclescoaching.com 38 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. offering to teach them how to write and publish books, which is what I could do at that time. It’s a great way to raise your level, because, when you stand in front of people as a speaker, they see you as a peer and an expert. And, guess what? They want to hang around you. But remember, you can begin at home with the things you surround yourself with. What are you reading and listening to? Try some audio programs from Nightingale Conant. Read success literature – self-help and pop psychology. A lot of excellent material has been around since the 1800s, and is still in print. Some of it’s free online, or you can go to Amazon and browse. And I’m not just talking about my books – there are lots of books that might fall into that category. As you change your mind, declare new intentions, and start taking action, you’ll begin to attract and meet other people. Consider putting yourself out there as a speaker, and, at the very least, attend some networking groups. They’re in every city and meet for breakfast, lunch, or dinner. See which ones appeal to you and have the status you want to belong to. Gregory: When you were starting out, did the way that people’s perceptions of you as a speaker have an effect on the way that you perceived yourself? Did it increase your confidence at all? Joe: Yes, in fact, I remember the first speech I gave in Houston. I spoke to all six people in it – and shook so bad I thought I was going to pass out and slide to the ground. I really had to work on myself. www.miraclescoaching.com 39 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. At first, you’re uncomfortable with everything you do for the most part, but as you keep doing it, it gets easier. Gregory: You also talk about benestrophe in Instant Manifestation. Can you tell us more about that? Joe: It’s a newly coined word and is the opposite of catastrophe. It means a lot of great things happening at once. We all know about catastrophes, the disasters because the media is constantly reporting on them. But what about a benestrophe? It’s a language change, and language influences everything we think and do. It’s important for people to become aware of how they’re using it. The mindset of most people is focused on the negative – our thoughts are critical and doubting. It would almost appear it’s the natural current for our brain to go in, if only because we’ve been doing it for so long. In Miracles Coaching™, and in all my material, the goal is to help people start thinking positive. If they do, they’ll lead a more positive life. They’ll act positive and get positive results. When people think in terms of catastrophes, or negativity, their energy plummets. They don’t feel optimistic about life and don’t feel like doing anything. But you can change your energy by thinking thoughts like, “Wow, there is magic and miracles in the world! What if it all works out? What if everything I want to try actually will work? What if this cleaning process I’m doing is actually making a difference?” www.miraclescoaching.com 40 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Playing with language is one of the things we can do to make a difference in our life and attract miracles. Benestrophe is just one way to do it. It’s a fun word, and I love it! Gregory: Affirmations help with that, too, which some of your audios include. For example, there’s an affirmation in an audio you did with Pat O’Bryan called “Clearing for Money” about not spending your money before you have it. Could you please explain what you mean by that and what is the underlying principle? Joe: It’s not as complicated as it might seem. If you don’t have money, don’t spend it. In other words, don’t rely on your credit cards, and don’t get into debt. Debt is not wealth to me and can get you in trouble financially and mentally. It happened to me. After being homeless, I was in poverty for a while, but managed to get a credit card. I would tell myself, “It’s okay to go out to eat because I deserve it.” I did all kinds of wonderful things when I didn’t have the money – I’d just put it on my credit card. When you start using credit cards and mounting debt, it gets difficult to keep up because these companies charge 18 to 30% interest. Paying off that $50 dinner suddenly becomes a $300 debt. Some people suggest it’s okay to leverage your debt, but it’s easy to deceive yourself and say, “I don’t have the money to buy this jacket, but I have a credit card so put it on that.” The fact is if you don’t have the money in your pocket or bank account, you shouldn’t buy it. www.miraclescoaching.com 41 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. In my book, Attract Money Now, I talk about prosperous purchasing, and one of the seven steps is to stay away from debt when buying something. If you want prosperity and to feel prosperous, you may have to do it in baby steps until your consciousness and self-worth expands. If you work with someone, like a Miracles Coach, it’ll get easier and more prosperity will come to you. Gregory: Is it safe to visualize yourself enjoying receiving and spending money in the future before the money actually comes to you? Joe: Absolutely, I do that today. I’m always expanding my own wealth consciousness, reaching for higher levels. For example, I visualize that when my new CD comes out, I’m going to take ads out in Rolling Stone® magazine, and hire publicists and marketing people. I’m not there yet, but I do it to increase my wealth level. Gregory: So it’s safe to see yourself spending the money in your visualization, but not safe to spend it in terms of going into debt. Joe: Yes, go ahead and be King Tut in your mind. Have a field day – because it’ll help you create it in reality. Then, when it’s in your reality, have fun, spend it, and invest it. www.miraclescoaching.com 42 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Gregory: What if someone feels guilty about doing that? For example, what if they feel their mission is selfish, or not good enough because, rather than dare something worthy, what they really want is to travel the world and have fun while they’re here on planet earth? Joe: I would say they’re trying to dodge responsibility. Saying you just want to travel and have fun is a cop out. There is a way to travel and have fun and still make a contribution to the world. It’s about being more creative and innovative. Maybe you could start your own travel agency, or create fun tour groups. You’d be traveling and having fun, but doing it in such a way that it helps other people. When we’re totally focused on ourselves and don’t want to make a difference, that is being selfish. It’s like saying you want to be a teenager all your life. If you really want miracles in your life, help other people because the things you want come through people. Notice I said through, not from. Even my book, Attract Money Now, which I give away for free at www.attractmoneynow.com, has a 7step formula for attracting money that includes helping your community and your world. I’m all for traveling and having fun. I do all that and still want to make a difference. So when people say that, I don’t think they’re being honest with themselves about what it is they really want to do – but are afraid to do. There’s www.miraclescoaching.com 43 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. nothing wrong with pursuing fun and travel, but there’s something incomplete about it in and of itself. I would look deeper. Who knows? It could be a hint of your life’s calling. I’d also like to know what they mean by fun. Maybe there’s an entrepreneurial aspect they could apply to it, like traveling around and hosting sporting events at donkey basketball games. Obviously I’m making this up, but the point is we are here to help each other. Yes, we’re here to learn and have miracles. We’re here to have a ball – while helping others. Relationships, money, all the things we want in life, are going to come through other people. So you’ve got to make a contribution, and there isn’t any way around this. In fact, the more contribution you make while still having fun, the more you can profit. A great example of this is Derek Sivers, who created CD Baby and recently sold it for $20 million. He said that the key to creating a business is in sharing. Share whatever it is you would normally – sell as a way to help people. His whole focus is on helping people. So find a way to help people in some way related to travel and fun, or those things you want to do. It’s a more complete path. Gregory: Are people just afraid of the responsibility of making a difference? And, if so, what would be the underlying root? Joe: I’ve found that the number one thing people resist is taking full responsibility for their lives. They don’t want it. They want problems to be www.miraclescoaching.com 44 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. someone else’s fault, and they want things to just drop in their lap from somebody else. Taking 100% responsibility means everything comes from within yourself, and when you take that kind of responsibility, it’s a great freeing moment. It’s as though you pulled the legendary sword out of the stone and now you have super powers. You no longer give the power away to anybody else. You have it. Gregory: I once made a really, really dumb decision that cost me not only a huge chunk of money – $160,000 – but a promise I made to my wife that I would never borrow against our family home. I’ve learned to say this without shame or regret, taking full responsibility for my mistake, and owning my junk. I have nothing to hide. Being able to say it, to hear it from my own voice and to own it has made such a big difference in my life. Joe: That’s great, because most people are afraid to make mistakes and, if they do, often don’t get past them. Years ago I ran into a billionaire who had said he had failed numerous times before he hit a winning streak and actually started making a lot of money. He told me he’d learned something profound from failure – that nothing bad happens to you. And knowing nothing bad ever happens to you takes away the fear. It’s priceless. People will have an idea for a business or product and think, “I’m afraid. What if I do attempt it and it fails?” Just remember the billionaire’s story – nothing www.miraclescoaching.com 45 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. bad happens to you. The world forgives, the world forgets, it keeps on clocking along, and isn’t going to think about you at all. Most of the time we beat ourselves up far more than anybody else would even get close to doing. As you pointed out in your own wonderful story of losing $160,000, you learned from it, and that’s the whole point. Lots of things I’ve tried didn’t work out. I don’t even call them failures. I just say, “Well, that didn’t work.” That’s it, it simply didn’t work. Then I either try something else or revise what I did. I don’t even talk about most of the things I try that don’t work because there’s not all that much to share. That’s why some people might look at me and think, “Oh, you’ve got a constant winning streak.” No, I just don’t talk about the times I went up to bat and missed. Gregory: So not dwelling on it is an important principle. What about when other people are involved with you? Do you agree with what Abraham says, that one person in the vortex is mightier than a whole village? For example, one of my students teamed up with four other investors to do his first buy, fix, and sell project. But due to unforeseen obstructions, they had to postpone selling. Now they’re at the point where they have to sell within the next month to avoid double holding costs. He’s been struggling with the group’s energy, but knows he has to manifest his reality no matter who he's involved with. Is there a way he can manifest a quick sale with the perfect buyer, even when there’s a lot of resistance in the group? Joe: www.miraclescoaching.com 46 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. I agree with the Abraham quote – one person can be the strongest. I’m not being flippant, or saying to just dismiss everybody else in the group. They may be having a lot of fear, but if you’re all invested, everyone’s going for a common goal, so you want to work this out. If this were me, I’d Nevillize this, which is Step 4 in my book, The Attractor Factor. I created the term Nevillize after Neville Goddard, a well-known metaphysical teacher and author in the 40s and 50s. He used to say, “Go to the end result of what it is that you want to attract.” In other words, whatever it is you want to manifest and see, act as if it’s already over. Imagine what you would do then, something that feels right, appropriate, and believable to you. For example, your student could imagine that one week from now he’s celebrating and going out to dinner with the people involved. Everyone’s happy, smiling, clinking champagne glasses together because the deal is done. He found the seller, everything was perfect, the money exchanged hands, and all is well. He feels it. It’s over, and he’s thinking, “Wow, that was a lot easier than what I thought.” Nevillelizing is different than visualizing. In visualizing, you might see yourself finding the right person, they write the check, you close the deal, and everything’s okay. That’s fine, and it does work, but I find it more powerful to Nevillize the end result, to go past it. In other words, you’re not thinking about manifesting in the future. It’s done now, and you step into the end result in your mind. You visualize as though you’re at that dinner, the deal is done, and the group is letting out a sigh of relief. They might even be looking at you saying, “Congratulations, you’re the one that pulled it out of the fire.” www.miraclescoaching.com 47 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Gregory: Would you also do Ho’oponopono? Joe: Absolutely, and that’s the deeper level to all of this, because the people you encounter represent your own belief system – no matter how hard it may be to accept this idea at first. As huge and heavy as it is, this is the way I live my life. It’s the reality of my world. Anybody that’s showing up in my world is actually me – whether they’re in conflict and not in alignment with me, or negative towards me, or if I’m part of a group that’s anxious and not on the same page as me. It doesn’t matter what it is, they represent some aspect of me that still believes what they’re articulating. This is why Ho’oponopono is so powerful – because you’re taking 100% responsibility and saying, “Okay, it isn’t my spouse, it isn’t my employer, it isn’t these people investing with me, it isn’t anybody on the outside. They’re mirrors of what’s in me.” You take it to the Divine, or God, and say, “I’m sorry, I don’t know what kind of program is in me that attracted these kinds of people, but they’re here. So please forgive me for being unconscious to my own inner beliefs, as I can see they’re being unconscious. Please forgive me.” Then you move into thank you by saying, “Thank you for taking care of this, thank you for resolving the issue, thank you for handling the negativity within me that I see in others because I know it’s only a perception.” www.miraclescoaching.com 48 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. The fourth phrase (although as I mentioned before you can say them in any order) is, “I love you.” This is where you move back into the space of gratitude and unconditional love. “I’m sorry, please forgive me, thank you, I love you.” This is how you can take care of everything going on in your life on a spiritual, core level. Gregory: This is one of the joys of being a Miracles Coach, being able to share these principles and techniques with our students, so they can achieve greater abundance, and see miracles in their own life. Before we say good-bye, is there anything you’d like to add? Joe: I’d just like to remind people that everything you’re looking for is right here. You may not believe it because you keep thinking, “Oh, but I want something else.” Trust me, the something else will come faster when you’re in this moment – and grateful. Years ago, this is one of the biggest lessons I had to learn. Before I would think, “I’ll be grateful when I get my job, when I get my first book published, when I get my first success….” But that’s not how this works. You have to be genuinely grateful – in this moment – appreciating anything that you can see. Feel it now, and it will cause the miracles you’re looking for to speed up. The next moment will get better and better. It will put you in a state of awe, and you’ll live a life of magic and miracles – but it starts right now, be grateful now. www.miraclescoaching.com 49 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Gregory: It’s been my pleasure to talk with you, Joe. We’re so grateful and appreciate your time. Joe: Thank you, Gregory, and God speed to everybody. www.miraclescoaching.com 50 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Secret Session #3 Joe Vitale with Michelle Minzghor Michelle: Joe, welcome! I’d like to start out today with a quote written by Cicero, a Roman statesman, orator, and writer, “The grateful heart is not only the greatest virtue but the parent of all others.” How would you interpret that? Joe: To me it means that a grateful heart is what transforms your life. When I was in my struggle for years – homeless for a while, and in poverty for a very long time – I wasn’t happy or grateful. I didn’t look at the positive, and I didn’t have a giving mindset. Mostly, I was after what I could get for me. This attitude of an ungrateful heart kept me in survival, and as long as I had it, I stayed there. Having a grateful heart means you open your heart for the ability to give, as well as for the ability to receive – and as soon as I started to move in that direction, my life began to shift. I didn’t do it instantly, so I didn’t have an instantaneous result. I was resistant, just putting my little toe in the water to see if this gratefulheart-kind-of-mentality actually made a difference. And it did. I discovered that the more grateful I could be, the more giving and generous I became in whatever way was available to me, and the more I began to receive. I became able to receive joy, love, material goods, spiritual nourishment, and inspiration. www.miraclescoaching.com 51 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. That’s the power of a grateful heart – Cicero was right. Michelle: As we become grateful and allow ourselves to recognize the blessings and gifts that are given to us, it’s like receiving a light into our soul – which then allows us to be more compassionate, humble, helpful, and kind. I can’t imagine somebody that has a grateful heart not having those other virtues. Joe: It begins there, but I can relate to people who are resistant to this idea because I had that mindset, too. I thought, “Sure, I’ll be grateful when I have something to be grateful for.” It took a long time for me to soften, and realize that when I could be grateful now for whatever was in my moment, my heart opened up. I was then able to see the joy and gifts that were all around me, and open myself to receive more joy and gifts. And, at that point, I was able to attract these to me. Michelle: So you went from a negative, scarcity mindset to saying, “I have to change my heart in order to be willing to receive.” What allowed you to make that shift? Joe: I think it’s different for everybody, including Cicero. www.miraclescoaching.com 52 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. When I heard about the grateful heart, this idea of giving and being generous, I was suspicious. I had to test it by giving something I had a lot of, something I felt I could always attract into my life – books. In other words, I was having trouble bringing in money and keeping it, so the idea of releasing money by giving it away wasn’t something I could do. To be blunt, I was too scared, too suspicious. So I looked around and thought, “Well, I always seem to have books around me. Let me start giving away books and see what happens.” Most of the books I had were from people who wanted me to review or promote them, not because I purchased them. Yes, I bought some, but I wasn’t a wealthy man and couldn’t buy a lot of things like that. So, as these books came into my life, I started reflecting on where I could share them. If someone mentioned an area of interest, I’d give them a book related to that, if I had one. This was my way of testing the idea of generosity, by simply giving something that was easy for me to give. We’re told through many religions and spiritual teachings that the more money you give to wherever you receive spiritual nourishment, the more money you will receive. But I couldn’t do that with money because I was too stubborn, resistant, and suspicious. That’s why I chose books. What happened is quite astonishing, really. More and more books showed up in my life – even to the point where I got my first book published, and then my second book. I entered a wealth publishing stream, where books were coming into my life, and my own books were being published and going out into the world. I’d get copies of my own book, distribute those to people, and other authors that I admired began sending me their books. www.miraclescoaching.com 53 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. It all started with me testing with something I felt I could do. After that I said, “If it worked for books, maybe it’ll work for money,” which is what we’re told all along. That was the next level, experimenting with the grateful heart in giving money, even when, at first, it felt like, “Oh, I can’t give more than a dime, I can’t give more than a dollar.” That’s where I started. Over time I kept increasing the level of giving, and noting my level of discomfort as I stretched my comfort zone. It still bothered me to give money because I was so attached to survival. I wanted to eat, pay rent, and pay for the clunker car I owned that kept breaking down. But even though I resisted giving money, I continued because of what I had seen in the book world. And as I started to give a little bit of money, more money started coming in, sometimes from unexpected places. For example, after years of struggling to get my writing published, it started to change. I had some things published and got paid for that. Keep in mind this was well before the internet, and it was a long process for me. I had to save up money for postage and manila envelopes, then send articles off and wait six weeks to six months before any response. I never stretched to the point where I was breaking the bank, though. In other words, I didn’t write a check for everything I had, only for what I felt was doable, yet still felt like a stretch. More and more opportunities continued coming my way. The more I gave money, the more money would come in. Today I feel like a member of the “Lifestyle of the Rich and Famous,” and money still comes in unexpected ways – all because I’m giving and sharing and living Cicero’s grateful heart. www.miraclescoaching.com 54 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Michelle: You stretched yourself when you didn’t think it was possible and it happened, which is similar to the idea we talk about in Miracles Coaching™ – daring something worthy. Joe: Yes, it’s all about stretching. It’s about doing what we really want to do anyway, pushing ourselves past our own doubt and inner resistance. For example, that’s what I’m doing with my music. A year ago, I had not written a song, or ever sang in public, let alone in a recording studio. I couldn’t keep a beat and only knew a handful of guitar chords – yet here I am today, promoting my own CDs. There was a latent desire for me to be a musician, but I didn’t have everything together. I made a decision, though, a choice, and said, “I am going to do this.” I set my intention, gathered my coaches and team, and started taking action – in spite of feeling like, “Wow, I don’t know that I can actually do this. I don’t know that I can pull this off.” But I just kept stretching. Every time those doubts came up, I would work with a coach to question and release them. I kept daring something worthy, and now I’m able to look at a copy of my own CD and feel proud. I’m like a little kid inside thinking, “I did it! I did it!” All of us have some sort of parallel where we want to do something, but we’ve got to stretch for it, whether that’s giving with the grateful heart, or pursuing a dream of ours. It gets down to facing those fears – and using that fear as energy – to get the dream created. www.miraclescoaching.com 55 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Michelle: We suggest students get into a positive mindset by using a gratitude journal – making lists and literally counting their blessings, naming them one by one. It’s a helpful process for the mind to see what we can be grateful for, and from there, transition into giving. Giving is one of the ways we actually show our gratitude, and it’s a phenomenal way to move from where we used to be, to where we’d like to be. We start by recognizing our blessings and what we’ve been given, and then stretch ourselves into giving – even when we don’t think we have anything to give. Joe: Yes, and we always have something to give. I was interviewed about this subject, and asked, “Some people don’t have money. Is it okay if they give of their time, energy, experience, or skills?” I said, “Of course it’s okay to give of whatever they have, however, that’s often a cop out – something they do instead of giving money.” People often say they’re having trouble attracting money, earning money, finding unexpected income, or getting more sales. I’ll ask them, “Are you giving money to wherever you receive spiritual nourishment, whether that’s your church or your bus driver?” Most of them say no, and, when I ask why, it’s because they’re afraid. Think about this – what kind of message are you giving to yourself if you hold back on your giving? Aren’t you confirming that you believe in scarcity? www.miraclescoaching.com 56 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Aren’t you confirming that you don’t believe in yourself, or in the giving principle? When you do give, you’re saying, “I live in an abundant universe. I trust, I believe, I’m grateful, I’m generous, and I know this is coming back.” You feel better. When you don’t give, when you don’t have a grateful heart, you feel a down energy. Your whole body droops – you won’t have that little spring in your step. But when you start to believe in yourself and take positive actions towards giving in a variety of ways, you affirm life. You’re in the flow and you can feel it in your body as your heart opens. You can feel the gusto in your life moving you along, and things begin to happen more rapidly. So I tell people, “Don’t deceive yourself, you can also give money.” We’ve all got it. We may have different degrees of it, but you can give a tiny percentage of it. Ten percent is the general rule of thumb – more than that and you’ll probably feel a little uncomfortable. This will help you get into Cicero’s grateful heart experience, and also realize you attract what you want by doing it. Michelle: The scriptures talk about it, too, for example, “Give and it shall be given unto you.” And it doesn’t say to wait until you have enough, or wait until your children are grown. There’s another quote I like, from Cynthia Christy, who we interviewed this month on “Learning for Leaders.” She said, “Giving is like electricity, it works every time.” She went on to say, “Money is a flow, it flows through our life. If we hold onto it, it blocks the flow of more money flowing.” www.miraclescoaching.com 57 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. She’s an amazing woman who has statistics and facts on what physically happens in our body when we choose to give. She mentioned that some doctors are now prescribing “giving” to their patients – because it helps the healing process in the body. Joe: Finally prescriptions we don’t have to go to the drugstore for. Michelle: Yes, and she told us the story of her friend, who began experiencing extreme pain in her hands, and then suddenly her eyes wouldn’t focus. When she went to the doctor, he diagnosed MS as rapidly debilitating her body. She called Christy, who advised, “Don’t focus on your pain. You need to stop thinking about yourself.” The woman answered, “What do you mean? I don’t have anything else to focus on. Look at me, I’m an utter mess.” Christy responded, “You’re feeling your disease. I’m going to give you a challenge. I challenge you to give away 29 gifts in 29 days. You can give anything – a phone call, a word, a thought, a prayer. The key thing, though, is you must give with an open heart, not expecting anything in return, and be grateful for what you have.” Her friend decided, “Okay, I’ll take the challenge.” The first day she called another friend of hers that had MS to give encouragement. After just one week of doing seven encouraging things, giving seven gifts, she said that she felt more positive. Two weeks later, she began walking without her cane, and on day 29, she and her husband actually walked an www.miraclescoaching.com 58 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. entire mile together. She had enthusiasm for her life again, and knew she had something to give in spite of what had been taken from her. Joe: Stories like this reinforce what we’re talking about. In fact there’s a book about it called 29 Gifts: How a Month of Giving Can Change Your Life. Anyone can do this for 29 days – and see how their life changes. I have a quote in front of me by Anne Frank that says, “No one has ever become poor by giving,” and another from Einstein, “It is every man’s obligation to put back into the world at least the equivalent of what he takes out of it. The value of a man resides in what he gives and not in what he is capable of receiving.” Michelle: A few years ago, we had a student who was struggling in his business and in financial despair. Two weeks after we started coaching, he said, “Somehow my father got wind of my financial struggles and wrote me a check for $1,700.” I said, “That’s a miracle, and now I’m going to challenge you to do something – give 10% of that away to the charity of your choice or ask God to direct you to where that 10% belongs to.” Within a month after that, his business took off and he began to receive more orders. He received so much from that one financial gift that he said, “I do the books for my company every two weeks, and I cannot wait to see what our profits are so I know how big that check is I get to write.” www.miraclescoaching.com 59 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Have you heard of the movie, Forever Strong? It’s the true story of Rugby coach Larry Gelwix, and the team he coached for over 35 years. He’s a speaker now, and whenever he talks, he offers his audience two challenges. His first challenge is to find someone you don’t need anything from – maybe don’t even know – and do something for them without any expectation in return. The second challenge is to seek out a job that you would normally say, “That’s not my job,” and do it anyway. He challenges people to do this for seven days with the promise that, if you keep it up and journal or share those experiences with a partner, you will be a changed person at the end of seven days. Joe: That’s an amazing idea. Michelle: I also like what Robert Allen and Mark Victor Hanson have to say in their book, The One Minute Millionaire, that sharing is having more. They say that if you go behind the scenes of the most grateful fortunes, you’ll find a common pattern – the more they gave, the more they got. Here’s a quote from the book: …giving expands money. How? Just as water exists in three forms, ice, liquid and vapor, we find it useful to think that money exists in three dimensions: the frozen state (material), the liquid state (mental), and the ethereal or spiritual state. If you give money from an attitude of gratitude and abundance, it thrusts you from the material state into ethereal or www.miraclescoaching.com 60 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. spiritual dimension. Sir John Marks Templeton, founder of the successful Templeton Funds, once said that, “Tithing gives you the greatest return on your investment.” Joe: Dan Kennedy once told me that the window in your life where you receive money is made bigger by how much you give. It’s all psychological. If you’re receiving a little bit, you have a little window of receiving. The way to expand and make your window bigger, so you can receive more, is by giving. When people don’t give, they’ve closed down their understanding of life itself, coming from a viewpoint that says, “There isn’t enough. I’m not going to get my share, so I better hold onto what I have.” Holding is the thing that causes the restriction around receiving. When you let go and start to give, you put yourself in the flow of life – and the flow of money as circulation. You build that bigger window to receive more. Then, as you start receiving, you give more and make the window even bigger. You can see this with tycoons like Rockefeller who started giving and kept increasing it – it’s no wonder they became so wealthy. It wasn’t so much a matter of what they were doing in their businesses, although obviously that’s part of it. It’s what they were doing internally, how they felt about themselves and the world, and about giving and receiving. Whatever it is that you want to receive in the world, give that – and the more you give of that, the more you will receive that. This is powerful stuff, especially when I think back to the stubborn, close-minded Joe Vitale, giving away books, and being startled by all the books that showed up in his life. And then doing it www.miraclescoaching.com 61 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. again with money and watching money start to come in – when, for decades, if not most of my life, it wasn’t there or it just trickled in. Michelle: Yes, it is truly powerful, and it happened in my own life. There was a period of time when I was in real estate and nothing was going right. I said, “Okay, you’ve got to get back to being a tithe-paying woman.” I reminded myself of the promise in the Bible that says “the windows of heaven will be opened unto you so much that you won’t have room to receive it.” I started paying tithe again and within just a few months, clients and deals began falling into my lap – and I didn’t have time enough in a day to work for them. Joe: You mentioned keeping a journal, and, I agree, it’s important to write down what’s going on because we become so much more aware when we start writing things down. If we don’t document, we tend not to remember or anchor our lives – it’s too easy to gloss over and forget. Journaling can be life changing, a transformative tool all by itself. I suggest that you give, and note what you’re giving, even though you want to give without any sense of needing the money to come back from that source. Also note what you’re receiving – keep a tally. Write down, “I gave so and so ____ amount of money today.” After you do this, list what you’re grateful for that day. Maybe you’re grateful for your cup of coffee or a safe commute to work. You might be grateful www.miraclescoaching.com 62 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. for your Miracles Coach, a pet, clothes, roof, phone, or computer – whatever it is, make a list. So it’s not only a gratitude journal. It’s an inventory of what you’re giving, and a way to notice over time how everything’s changing. My guess is you’ll discover that you’re giving even more, and that wonderful things are showing up, very often unexpectedly. Michelle: In my journal, I always express gratitude for what I have been given, and I also pray about my own physical To-Do list, the things I know I need Divine help accomplishing that day. At the end of the day, I go back over the list to see what I’ve accomplished, and what the universe helped me to accomplish. When we take note of it, writing it down regularly, it’s amazing to see how much we’ve accomplished and, therefore, have to feel grateful for. It invigorates the soul. Joe: When you go back and re-read some of your journals, it will startle you. It’s so easy to get caught up in day-to-day living and future pacing, always thinking about what’s next. So make it an intention journal, and a gratitude journal, and document all the giving and receiving. This isn’t work. Make it fun, like a scientific experiment, see what the results are and then report back. Michelle: www.miraclescoaching.com 63 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. There’s a great article called “Why Giving Matters ” by Arthur Brooks [http://speeches.byu.edu/?act=viewitem&id=1826], an economist and researcher, who wanted to find statistical facts about the power of giving. In the article, he discusses the happy results of giving, saying, “The more I ran the numbers, the more I kept getting this crazy result. I kept getting the same thing over and over and over. Rockefeller was right, but I still refused to believe it.” In complete disbelief and desperation, he decided to take it up with a fellow colleague who “specialized in the psychology of charitable giving.” His friend asked him why he didn’t believe that the results could be true, and suggested if he was a Christian, he should. Brooks said, “…But I’m a social scientist. We’re not supposed to believe those things. I need a more earthbound explanation.” So his friend gave him one that, he said, psychology had been onto for 30 years: “We haven’t just been talking about money. You economists – you worry about money all the time, and money is boring. We worry about something that people really care about – the currency by which we really spend our days—and that’s happiness. We’ve known for 30 years that people who give get happier as a result. Can you use that?” Joe: That’s an amazing story, and I agree with it. I’ve given away a lot of things in the last few years, everything from cars to money to iPads, but there’s one thing I’ll never forget because of the feeling of giving that came from it. www.miraclescoaching.com 64 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. I had bought an older Porsche, a 1989 Porsche S4 that had once belonged to a friend of mine – in fact, he was the original owner. I poured a lot of money and time into it, and kept thinking, “When this thing is all done and like new again, I’m going to give it to my friend.” There was no rational reason for it. Although my friend knew I’d bought the car, he didn’t ask for it, or even know I was working on it. When it was finished, I went over to their house, where I found out it was his and his wife’s wedding anniversary. I said, “Well, I have a wedding present for you.” I gave him the keys and the title. His wife started crying and he got redfaced. He didn’t know what to say. I knew he had wanted it but couldn’t afford to buy it, let alone fix it up. And as thrilled as they were to get it, I felt incredibly charged by doing it. I felt so good and loving – it was the most wonderful feeling. It’s hard to express the joy I felt inside giving him that car. Jim Rohn once said, “Giving is better than receiving because giving starts the receiving process.” When I gave that car, I wasn’t thinking of receiving – only giving. But I tell you that, ever since then, I have received even more cars and money. Wonderful things keep happening in my life, and I believe it’s a direct result of the giving I’ve been able to do. I love being generous. It’s probably no coincidence that we’re talking about this with Christmas here for those of us who observe it – a time of giving and receiving. What a joyful experience, and for that, Christmas should be every day. Michelle: www.miraclescoaching.com 65 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. It seems that gratitude and giving go hand in hand, and that we can only become a giving people if we learn to express gratitude – in that order. So if we can learn to be grateful, we can learn to be a more giving people, with all the amazing results that brings. The article I quoted also mentions that one of the fringe benefits of giving is it builds good leadership within us, citing a study done at the University of Kent in Southern England. Researchers divided people into groups, gave them money, and asked them to donate all of it to a common fund. This fund was then matched, doubled, and divided equally among all the participants. In the next round, they were instructed to give whatever amount they wanted, which would be matched, as well. That fund would, again, be divided equally among everyone. Obviously, the best thing for everyone would be to put all their money in, which some did. The crafty ones, however, kept their money while others added theirs, so when it was divided they received a portion of that – plus their own money. At first, it seemed to work out for the stingy ones. But as Brooks went on to say, “There was a second phase in which people in the game were asked to break into teams and elect leaders. They found that in 82% of the cases, the leaders who were elected were the biggest givers from the first phase.” Joe: And there’s the punch line. Michelle: www.miraclescoaching.com 66 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. There are so many side benefits of giving we don’t know about, and often go unrecognized – benefits that grow within us by giving. Joe: Elbert Hubbard said, “Love grows by giving. The love we give away is the only love we keep. The only way to retain love is to give it away.” I know that, in my case, giving changed my life. It allowed me to release qualities like stubbornness, resistance, suspicion, and doubt, as well as homelessness and poverty – all negative patterns of thinking and behavior. Michelle: What better time of year to put the law of the tithing and the law of giving into action – even when we feel we don’t have anything to give? There are so many gifts we can give in addition to money. I am grateful for the opportunity to talk about this important topic. Thank you, Joe, for sharing your time and knowledge with us. Joe: Thank you for choosing to make this conversation about giving, which is, of itself, a giving thing to do. God speed, everyone. www.miraclescoaching.com 67 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Secret Session #4 Joe Vitale with Adam Mortimer Adam: Joe, welcome! Thanks for being here to teach us how to take our lives to the next level of success. Joe: Thank you, Adam. It's always great to be here. To get started, would you mind doing what you're famous for and bring us all into the moment with a gratitude exercise or meditation? Adam: Absolutely…I’ll just begin with what comes to mind. I'm so grateful for this new day. I'm grateful for the wonderful mountains outside my window and the fresh mountain air. I am grateful for the snow, the beautiful scenery, and the opportunity I have to help free people from their psychological chains. I'm grateful for the wonderful mysteries of the universe that have been revealed to me. I'm grateful for the ability that I have to relax completely and to let go of my limiting beliefs. I am grateful for the freedom that this program has given me. I'm grateful for my wonderful wife and family, my faith and my belief, and for the miracles that I see each day. I am grateful for life. www.miraclescoaching.com 68 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Joe: I'm grateful for what you just said, and I'm grateful for this moment. I'm grateful for you and everybody in Miracles Coaching™. There is much to be grateful for. It feels good. What can I offer today? Adam: Let’s talk about the idea of “Fake it ‘till you make it.” How would apply that to someone with a food allergy? For example, I had a student ask, “How do I fake it with a food allergy? I'm allergic to chicken and eggs, so do I tell myself I’m not allergic? I’m always having to do things like ask the restaurant if the food has anything in it, checking packages to see if anything is written on it before buying, and explaining when I'm invited somewhere why I'm not able to eat something.” Can a person with allergies reprogram their mind that way? Joe: I think everybody can relate to this on some level, whether it's a food allergy or something else. First, you have to remind yourself that's your “current” reality because, as I wrote about in The Attractor Factor, your current reality will change. It's going to change on its own, but you can accelerate the change and help move it in the direction you want it to go. www.miraclescoaching.com 69 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. The question this person asks presupposes they’re not going to change. They’re saying, “Well, I have this food allergy and I'm always going to, so how the heck do I get around having this food allergy and pretend that I don't have it?” Your mind set is determining what you have, so you want to project yourself into the future where you don't have the food allergy. Maybe you went on a fast, found some herbs, or an alternative healer. Somehow, you got rid of the food allergies, which is entirely possible. People get rid of food allergies all the time – it's not something your DNA is programmed to have for eternity. So, project yourself into a future time when you don't have the food allergies. What is your life like then? What are you ordering for meals? You’d be consciously choosing whatever feels good to you and your body in that moment, without worry or stress because, in this future, you’re past that. What you're doing now is pretending you’re already that future you, where your mindset is, “Oh, this is resolved, I feel great. I have no allergies at this point. I'm totally healthy and well. I eat what I want, I enjoy what I want, and all is well.” Some of it’s a mind game because, yes, in this present moment, you might have to be aware of your food sensitivities or food allergies, but you realize a miracle is about to take place and you won't have those food sensitivities or allergies anymore. That's the mindset to pretend you're in. When I say, “Act as if,” I mean to act as if you're already there. Act as if you've already attracted the very being you want to be, or the physical body that you want to be in. Adam: It’s a question of which reality you want to believe in. www.miraclescoaching.com 70 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Do you want to be in the one where you're stuck or would you rather bridge the gap between the present and future? The only way to do that is with faith, but it sounds like there's a lot of doubt and fear in this person’s question, as though they don’t believe they're ever going to be able to overcome it. I've never seen a miracle with someone full of doubt and fear, so you have to say, “You know what? I can take my life to the next level if I simply bridge the gap through faith.” That’s when it can happen, although bringing that future to the present is sometimes the hardest part. How do you get over a belief when current reality seems so real? You've got to reject the current reality and go for the future you want, and you do that with faith. Joe: It's interesting you use the word “faith,” because later this year I have a new book coming out with that exact title – Faith. Adam: That's exciting news! Joe: Yes, and it ties in to what you just said, that faith is the answer. Are you giving your power to this moment of negativity and the things you don't want, or are you giving your power to what you're creating and what you do want? It's a mind shift – but you can do it, and faith is at the core of it. www.miraclescoaching.com 71 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Adam: We definitely live in a faith and belief driven universe, so if we can't believe, then we cannot activate the forces of the universe to bring about a miracle. Joe: I do want to mention that, as a side note, if someone’s interested in learning more about food allergies and sensitivities, my partner, Nerissa, specializes in this area. She's got a website dedicated to resolving issues once and for all, which you can visit at www.FoodPowers.com This site gives free information, leads, and direction on overcoming food allergies and food sensitivities naturally, easily, quickly. Adam: What can someone do who is struggling with their health and wants to see it improve faster? One student said they’ve been meditating, but it didn’t seem to be helping. Are they just stuck with being ill? Joe: No, they’re not stuck with an illness. What’s happening is their impatience is coming to the forefront of their awareness, the key issue in why it’s not resolved right now. He’s implying, “This isn't working fast enough for me. What do I need to do to make it work faster? I'm meditating and doing whatever else I'm doing here, but it hasn't happened yet. How do I make it happen now?” www.miraclescoaching.com 72 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. The subtext communicated through the question reveals a level of impatience. Where's the impatience coming from? Most likely from a belief that says, “I don't really believe this stuff works. I don't really believe meditation works. I'm not so sure anything I'm doing or trying is ever going to work. I might actually be destined to having this problem forever.” Remember, everything we're getting comes to us because of our beliefs, but most of the time, 95% or more, those beliefs are totally unconscious. We're oblivious to it, and this is why we end up asking questions like, “I'm doing meditation, how come I'm still sick?” The meditation is obviously working by bringing to the surface the thing that's bothering you the most, which is your impatience, held in the thought, “It's not happening for me yet.” So explore why the impatience is there. Relying on your Miracles Coach and sharing what's going on is important. You can reveal the beliefs, release, and erase them, and then you'll say, “Oh, I don't even remember being sick.” The health issue will be gone and you won't even have a memory of it. That's when you know it's totally resolved. Adam: It goes back to a lack of faith in the healing process, and learning to focus on the right things versus focusing on what you don't want. Sometimes that's the big issue in helping students. How do you get them to stop focusing on what they don't want in order to create a new reality they want? That may be the most important thing we do. Joe: www.miraclescoaching.com 73 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. There's a 5-step formula in The Attractor Factor and the first step is: Know What You Don't Want. When people say, “I'm still sick,” or “People at work are bothering me,” it's okay to say it. This might seem odd, but you need to know what you don't want. Just don't stay there. The second step is: Declare What You Do Want. Take what you don't want and state it in the 180-degree opposite. If you're tired of meditation not making you heal instantly, turn it around and say, “What I want is to be healed as quickly and easily as possible in the fastest way possible,” which could through meditation, or something else that comes along to you. Whatever it is that you don't want, acknowledge it just enough to be able to restate your intention. Now you’ll be going in the direction of manifesting it because you attract whatever it is you focus on. As long as you focus on what you don't want, you're going to be stuck in that energy. You'll keep complaining about it and questioning it – it’s a downward cycle. The bottom line is you'll keep yourself there. As you start to go in the direction of the new intention, you'll think, act, and feel differently. New experiences, people, and solutions will come to you almost magically. You'll just stumble across them. Somebody will mention something to you and it will be the exact thing at the right moment. But the way you start is by taking your attention off what you don't want and putting it on what you do want. Adam: You’ve mentioned before that you can’t change anybody. Does clearing force people to change or does it give them the opportunity to change? www.miraclescoaching.com 74 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. And, if the Divine allows people to make their own decisions, how exactly does clearing the energy within me clear the energy in others? Joe: Clearing doesn't change anybody else. In Ho’oponopono, the Hawaiian healing method I wrote about in my book, Zero Limits, there are actually no other people in the outer world. They are projections of what's in you. Interestingly, Hawaiian philosophy doesn't use the word “projection.” They say that when you see a problem, or you have a problem with somebody, it isn't the other person. The other person in many ways doesn't exist. They're essentially a projection or illusion, mirroring what's in you. The fundamental turning point is when you realize that everything you experience is in you, and you understand that, when you change you, it will appear that other people have changed. But they didn't change at all. You changed and so your perception has changed. Dr. Hew Len, my co-author, was the therapist who worked with the group of mentality ill criminals at the Hawaii state hospital. He didn't go around changing patients, nor did he work one on one with them. He worked the system, looking at their files and noting what he felt inside himself. As he cleared what he felt inside, those patients who appeared to be on the outside got better. This is why that ward had such a success rate of helping people who were essentially thrown away and considered hopeless, with no way to heal them. He was able to make that change – but he didn't change them, he changed himself. www.miraclescoaching.com 75 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Whenever you look “out there” and see your family, friends, co-workers, or your spouse, ask yourself, “Where do I experience the problem?” You experience it in you – the problem is not outside. It's inside because there’s nothing on the outside. This is so important to understand to have a better life that I wrote a song about the nature of projection called Strut, which is on one of my recent CDs. If you want to change anybody, which is not even an accurate way of saying it, don't look at them, look at you. Dr. Hew Len used to ask the question, “Have you ever noticed when there's a problem, you are there?” It's because you are the one experiencing the problem. In order to get rid of any problem, whether you consider it coming from the outside or not, you don't change the outside. Change the inside, change you. So use clearing for yourself, not for changing someone else. Adam: My next question is about work. What do you suggest when people at work are rude and disrespectful to someone, or overly controlling and difficult? Joe: I've been there, and there are at least two ways to think about this. One is that you train people how to respond or react to you through your own behavior, which stems from your thoughts about yourself. You’re teaching people how to treat you, which is hard for some people to hear. They think, “Well, they're beating me up and I'm not training them to do that.” But, in some way, you are. You're sending out a signal and inviting that in on an unconscious level. www.miraclescoaching.com 76 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. This is what makes Miracles Coaching™ somewhat priceless, because we’re exploring deeper issues we can't always see by ourselves. It’s serving us on this unseen, unconscious, belief-driven level. All we see is the end result and then we blame others for it. We blame the people at work. We blame our coworkers, bosses, supervisors, or whoever it happens to be, but blame isn't going to help you because it’s coming from being a victim. In The Awakening Course, I talk about four stages. The first stage is the level of this kind of question, and isn't actually a stage of awakening at all because you’re being a victim – you're asleep. Victim mentality isn’t going to help you. If anything, it's going to make you feel bad, and keep you from growing or attracting miracles. So look at this idea that you’re training people how to treat you. Start to love yourself so much that it exudes from you. They’ll begin to feel that energy, and turn around and love you. It’s not about changing other people. You can't change them, but you can inspire them. You can be a model for them. The vibe you're sending out is causing what you're seeing, so change the vibe inside yourself. Adam: It really boils down to the way you view yourself – it's all about your selfimage. You send out messages based upon what you believe subconsciously, and that energy comes through to other people. Ninety-five percent of communication www.miraclescoaching.com 77 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. is your body language and tonality, all based on the thoughts you're thinking about yourself. Think highly of yourself and others will think more highly of you. It's a universal law. It has always worked this way, and it will continue. Raise your own vibration, and other people will mirror that. This gets us into the Law of Attraction. Can you tell us how much of this is in your mind, and how much of it is the universe? Joe: There's no difference. That’s like saying, “How much of the law of gravity is in your mind and how much is out there in the universe?” It's one and the same. You are the universe. The mind is the universe. There's no division or differential. Adam: People get into trouble trying to separate themselves and universe, because we’re connected and part of the whole. We’re one with it. Joe: A spiritual teacher, Jacquelyn Small, said, “A way to understand is to spell the word universe – y-o-u-n-i-v-e-r-s-e – that way you can see that you (y-o-u) is in universe. You are the universe. Adam: www.miraclescoaching.com 78 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. What is the nature of the energy we send out to the universe? Is it light waves or sound waves, some type of energy waves? Joe: I'm not a quantum physicist or a scientist, so I can’t answer it in specifics. As a metaphysician, coach, author, and speaker, I see it as an invisible energy. Studies show that even when we are thinking 2,000 miles away, we can influence an object in another state, or on the other side of the continent. What is that? A light vibration? Sound? Pure thought? I don't really know, I just know it's energy. You can feel it, use it, bend it, will it, and experience it. All of it. Adam: It's debatable among scientists, too. We just know it exists. It’s like a car. You don't need to know exactly how a catalytic converter works in order to drive. You know how to open the door, turn the wheel, and start the car. You’ve got a gas pedal and brakes. You just need to know the basics. Beyond that, you don't need to get into the technicalities. Joe: That’s a great analogy because I just bought an all-electric car and feel like I'm driving a 5,000 pound computer. I'm used to cars with transmissions and gear shifts, and this doesn't have those. It has a steering wheel, which I know about, and a pedal, but it's not a gas pedal because there's no gas. www.miraclescoaching.com 79 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. When I want to drive, all I do is hit a button marked "D" for drive and suddenly it's ready to move, but I have no idea how or why. If somebody asked me, “How does the energy conversion work?” I would have to say, “I have no idea. All I know is I'm going to the store, and going to hit 'D.' I'll see you in fifteen minutes.” That's it! I can use it but I can't explain it. Adam: We could say to people, “Don't worry about it – just push the 'D' button already.” Joe: Just push the "D" button – I love it. Focus on what you want and take inspired action on the opportunities that show up in your mind or on the outside, that’s the equivalent of pushing the "D" button. Adam: What would you say is the best way to have peace in your soul? Joe: The best way I know is to realize it’s already there. Your soul isn't restless; it's the mind that's restless. Sometimes the body has all kinds of stresses accumulated in it, but the soul is peace – you are peace. All that’s required is to recognize it's there, and the best way is probably through some form of meditation and relaxation. In simply breathing and following your breath, www.miraclescoaching.com 80 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. you can separate your awareness from the thoughts flying, and from whatever your body is trying to do to adjust and feel more at ease. Behind the thoughts, emotions, and body – all that’s buzzing around – is what some teachers refer to as “the witness.” Call it the soul, the essence of life, or your connection to God, it’s the heart of peace. The core of you is at peace, and it’s our duty, challenge, or opportunity, depending on how you look at it, to feel that peace. Since it's already here, we can quiet ourselves to actually feel it and experience it. In fact, I'm doing this as I'm talking. My experience is, “Wow, this moment is pretty incredible. I love these questions. I love Adam's energy and his responses and the additions he's giving.” As I feel that this moment is fantastic, a miracle, my soul is at rest right here in this moment. It's when we wander off with our thoughts and get carried away with the monkey mind that we say, “How do I find peace? How do I get peace?” And all the time, it's here. Adam: The soul's balance state is peace. When we're at balance, we're at peace. I coach many students into this place quite rapidly, and it's sometimes shocking to them because they haven't felt it in so long. It's not abnormal to feel peace – it's abnormal not to feel peace. Joe: Yes, that's the natural state, and it's available for each of us now. Adam: www.miraclescoaching.com 81 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Is it true that emotions activate the Law of Attraction, and is there a way to increase our emotions? For example, can we Nevellize for this? Joe: Yes, emotions are the leverage. They’re like a gas pedal, and the way to increase them is by focusing on the love, passion, and joy in whatever it is that you're trying to attract or achieve. Nevelle Goddard, who I wrote about in The Attractor Factor and some of my other books, encouraged people to focus on the end result. He said to imagine you've already attracted the miracle you're longing for, to experience it in your mind and in your body as though it's already here. When you do, notice those aren't feelings of unhappiness, heaviness, or sadness, but rather feelings of bliss, joy, passion, and love – and you increase them by focusing on them. As you associate those emotions with the thing that you’re attracting, and imagine you've already attracted it, you continue to up the wattage. In other words, you can push the "D" button, and get there even faster. Adam: NLP (Neuro-Lingistic Programing) can help turn up the emotional response, too. For example, you can make images bigger, brighter, and closer, and you can add sounds, increase the volume, or speed everything up. Another basic of the Law of Attraction seems to be that we live in a thinking universe – it is us. Would you say all things are made up of thought substance or intelligence, and that we’re inherently connected through this universal thought substance that fills the universe? www.miraclescoaching.com 82 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Joe: Yes, we are the cells and the planets – and we are thinking it is thinking. Adam: It's definitely easier to understand how the Law of Attraction works when you break everything down to energy, I’ve noticed in coaching that some students struggle with staying positive. One person said, “I feel like the older I get, the less time I have to think. It makes it harder to stay balanced.” Do you have any suggestions for staying positive more consistently? Joe: Sometimes thinking is the booby prize. You can overthink, and the truth is, you don’t need to understand everything. I don't know that anybody who can actually explain the universe so that a thinking person, or all thinking people, can agree on what it is. Everyone seems to think differently. When you trust your connection to life, to God, or the universe – it overrides thinking. Thinking is actually supposed to serve our connection to the universe, and lead us into Divine feelings, which then direct us to where miracles will hatch for us. We do this by tuning in to our connection through a quieting of the mind, so we feel the peace of our soul. From there, we can feel the nudge to do what is next for us. www.miraclescoaching.com 83 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. I'm not dismissing thinking because I enjoy thinking. I’m a thinker and read a lot. But, while I may speculate on different things, I am much more in favor of feeling my connection to the Divine, and following the orders it's giving me. Adam: There’s a great trick in NLP that works like magic for things like this. Any time you catch a limiting belief such as, “I don’t have time to think,” try saying it in a falsetto voice, like Mickey Mouse. Usually you'll start chuckling and laughing, which helps to reframe it, "Wait a minute, I don't have time to think, really? You know, that’s pretty silly. I do have time to think.” You can eliminate a limiting belief just by saying it differently. Joe: Yes, contrast helps, especially when someone is confused whether a thought is a limiting belief or an inspiration because they’re not detached enough. Writing it down is one way to separate yourself from the thought so that you can see the difference, and saying it out loud helps you hear it – especially if you do it in a Mickey Mouse voice. That’s a great idea. Adam: What would you say to someone who wants to stay positive and in the moment, but has kids or family that is constantly getting on their nerves, and feels that the only time they find peace is when they’re alone – which they never seem to have? www.miraclescoaching.com 84 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Joe: Like we talked about earlier, there’s nobody on the outside. When you blame your family or friends – something outside yourself – for your disturbance, you’re in a victim state of mind, throwing your power to nothing. When you come from empowerment, you realize you’re attracting this for unconscious reasons, and you go inside to find and release them. As I said before, you teach people how to respond to you. If they’re getting a reaction by being noisy or interrupting, then you’ve attracted it. In fact, on some level, you probably want it. For example, could it be you’re looking for an excuse not to do your work? You have to look at all of the belief dynamics going on. When you’re empowered, you’re better able to love and appreciate all the people in your life, even if they’re making a ruckus and you can't get a particular job done. The point is you've got a family, so, by God, love them. This will transmute what's going on within you, and, on a practical level, allow you to set boundaries. You may decide to create an office in your home or somewhere else where you can have quiet time. While there are different levels for doing this, I’ve found the most powerful one is examining beliefs about your work, yourself, and your family. When you resolve those, you'll find that you can work and have peace anywhere. There are plenty of people who manage to work and write in places like coffee shops, or the airport, even with all the possible distractions of other people wandering around, talking on their phones, typing on their computers, playing videos games, and ordering food. Somehow they get work done. Adam: www.miraclescoaching.com 85 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. It boils down to making time, creating a set time where you're going to meditate or have quiet time. You don't just wish for it to magically appear because it won't. You've got to make it happen. Joe: Yes, and make sure you're focusing on what you want to have come into your life. What do you want to have, do, or be? Focusing on that is going to bring it to you. Remember – just push the "D" button. Adam: I love it. Thanks so much for being here, Joe. Our conversations are always intellectually stimulating. Joe: Thank you, Adam, and God speed. www.miraclescoaching.com 86 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Secret Session #5 Joe Vitale with Janeen Detrick Janeen: Joe, thank you for being here today. Joe: I always love gathering together with people who are going for magic and miracles in their lives. We’re doing wonderful things. What a wonderful time to be alive! Would you lead us through a brief meditation, or gratitude moment, to let go of any stresses or distractions, so we’re all centered and here in this moment where the point of power is? Janeen: Yes, I’d be happy to. I noticed the stress on the word brief, do you think I can do that? Joe: We don’t want any stress at all, so you can do brief or long, however you want to do it. Janeen: Bless your heart, that’s precious. You’re so conscious. www.miraclescoaching.com 87 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. For this gratitude moment, anchoring meditation, I am choosing a beautiful pottery bowl I have beside me, because I like to select something in my immediate surroundings to offer gratitude for, to raise my vibration in gratitude. Thank you, bowl, for being in my life and for being present in this corner of my desk to brighten and beautify this corner of my life. I am so deeply appreciative of your rich red, which reminds me of manifestation and the root chakra. I appreciate your red color, beautiful little pottery bowl. Thank you for reminding me how connected to the earth we are as I think about the clay, which the potter utilized to mold and shape you, beautiful pottery bowl. Thank you for holding these healing gemstones and rocks that resonate with vibration, which I so appreciate, enjoy, and feel. I am very appreciative that you are here in my life, little pottery bowl. Thank you to the potter. Thank you for adding your energy to this bowl so that I can have this pottery bowl beautifying the corner of my desk. I appreciate you for crafting this with love and for bringing that love into my life every day as I look at this beautiful pottery bowl. Thank you. Thank you for this moment and how I feel my vibration rise to that of gratitude as I hold you in my awareness. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Joe: You do that so well. I feel really centered in this moment. www.miraclescoaching.com 88 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Janeen: The gratitude moment, anchoring meditation is one of my favorite things to do to bring myself back to this moment. Joe: Gratitude is the single most powerful thing you can do in any moment to transform yourself and your surroundings. And it’s so simple. Just look for anything in the moment like you did with the bowl, anything that you can sincerely begin to feel gratitude for. As you explore and deepen it, you’ll feel your whole body, mind, outlook, perspective, and paradigm change. Your next moments will then be even more beautiful because now you’re going to be attracting more things, more experiences, more moments to be grateful for. It all stems from gratitude and you can do that at any moment, it’s free. Janeen: That is a wonderful reminder to us all, to take a deep breath, and settle into the gratitude. Let’s talk about guilt, something many of our students struggle with because they can’t think of something “worthy enough” to be their life’s mission. Do you think it’s selfish for someone’s life’s mission to be about enjoying their life rather than, say, saving the whales? In other words, isn’t spending money automatically blessing other people and giving? After all, it blesses the people you buy things from and it creates jobs. Joe: www.miraclescoaching.com 89 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. I don’t think you need to save the whales; you just need to do what the passion is in you to do. As you do your passion you will enjoy your life and you will contribute your piece of the puzzle to the universe at large. Decades ago I gave a talk in Houston and at the beginning I passed out a jigsaw puzzle. I asked everybody to take just one piece of the puzzle. When the box came back to me, it was empty and I said, “Look at the piece of the puzzle you have in your hand. Do you know what that is contributing to? Do you know what the end result is going to be by adding your piece to all the other pieces?” They had no clue because they couldn’t see the cover of the box. I still had the cover of the box. Life is like that. When you contribute your piece of the puzzle and I contribute my piece of the puzzle, we all make this wonderful masterpiece we call a world that works. For some people, it’ll be their piece of the puzzle to save the whales and for others, their piece of the puzzle will be to be a good mom and raise their kids in a loving, conscious, aware, and healing way. For somebody else, their piece of the puzzle will be to write a cookbook. Everybody has a piece of the puzzle. You might call it your calling, you might call it your life passion, you might call it your life work, or you might feel like you’re on a mission from God. It doesn’t mean necessarily you’re going to end world poverty or go to Africa and make the economy work, or clean up the Mississippi River. You just do what’s right for you to do and as you do it you will enjoy your life. As I’m writing songs these days for my next CD, I am feeling that this is my calling. Obviously I’m still an author – I speak, I travel, I do calls like this, but I also feel that when I write a song, I’m putting into it all of my life, my passion, my www.miraclescoaching.com 90 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. energy, everything. I feel called to do it and as I do it, I could end up changing some people because of a three minute song. So whatever it is that’s coming up from you in your life, you don’t need to judge it as not being grand enough because it’s as not a save-the-whales kind of a concept. It doesn’t need to be that. You just do your piece of the puzzle – whatever that happens to be. It might be taking care of your family, your friends, or doing something at your church community. I don’t know what it is, but you probably do. As far as spending money, yes, you are absolutely already blessing people. Money needs to be in circulation, so when you’re spending money, you’re helping it to circulate. As it circulates, it’s going to be touching different lives, giving jobs, helping entrepreneurs, and keeping business going. When you spend money, you’re doing wonderful things for yourself and the world. That’s great, and God’s speed to you, but don’t forget to give. Sometimes people see the blessing from spending, but not from giving. I’ve written entire books on this. My book, The Greatest Money-Making Secret in History! was all about giving in order to help the world and, ultimately, for you to receive. In Attract Money Now, I also talk about it being one of the seven steps for attracting money. You can’t overlook giving. When you don’t give, you actually shut down your ability to receive the wonders and the magic and the miracles that the universe is trying to give to you. A friend of mine often says that the window you create in your life to receive through is made bigger by how much you give, and this means the more you give of money. You can give time, energy, services, and all that’s great, too, www.miraclescoaching.com 91 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. but a lot of people try to dodge this idea of giving money, and I want to make sure that nobody’s skipping out on this because it’s a reality in the laws of the universe. It’s like a Divine law that the more you give the more you open up yourself to receive. Spending is good, so spend it wisely and consciously. It helps everybody, including yourself – but also give money. Wherever you get your spiritual nourishment and inspiration, give money there, whether that’s your church or minister, a waiter or bus driver, an author or speaker, or even a Miracles Coach. Janeen: People contribute to making the world a wonderful place by doing whatever is their passion. So it’s actually unselfish to do that? Joe: Yes, you’re supposed to do your passion and your passion is that piece of the puzzle. You’re not here to save the planet. You’re here to save whatever it is that your passion says. Maybe you love being a waiter or waitress. Do the best job humanly possible and enjoy it if that’s your passion. That’s your calling. That’s what you’re doing for now. If that’s not it, look within yourself or talk to your Miracles Coach to get clarity about what you really want to do. One way is to look at the idea of what would you do if you weren’t afraid. What would you do if you weren’t afraid of what people thought? What would you www.miraclescoaching.com 92 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. do if you weren’t afraid about money? What would you do if you weren’t afraid about the future or failure or repercussions? That’s going to take you in the direction of what’s fun for you, what your passion is, and what your life calling is. Maybe for some people it’s save the whales and God speed to them if that’s the case. But, for you, it could be something really different and unique…but it’s yours. Janeen: It’s almost as if you alleviated the pressure to perform for and on behalf of other people, or only thinking about other people. Joe: No one should be motivated by guilt. Your motivation should be love and passion, so that when you look within yourself, you’re not asking, “What should I do?” which comes more from a guilt mindset. Instead, the question you want to ask is, “What would I love to do? What am I excited to do? What would I do whether I was paid or not? What do I actually feel like it’s my calling to do?” These are the kind of questions that’ll lead you in the right direction. You’ll feel the glow of life, the gusto, and you’ll have a spring in your step because you’re doing what’s right for you. Janeen: www.miraclescoaching.com 93 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. So your encouragement to all of us to dare something worthy does not mean that you have to put yourself under some kind of obligation to do something you don’t love for or on behalf of other people. It’s just you doing what you love. Joe: Yes, daring something worthy simply means to stretch yourself. It means, “What would you do if you weren’t afraid of all these other things that come up in your consciousness?” It doesn’t mean go and conquer another planet. It doesn’t even mean doing something that scares you or doesn’t feel right at all. A big goal might make you a little bit jittery, but it’ll make you more excited than anything else. That’s the direction you want to go in. Dare something worthy means doing what it is for you to do here – follow your calling, do it with love, do it with passion and raise the bar. Do it better than anybody else has ever done it, but do it as it pertains to you, not anybody else. Janeen: Do it because you love it, not because you feel obligated. When it comes to giving, you hear in many spiritual traditions that it has to be 10%. Is that a universal number or should the amount you give be based on what you feel you want to give? Joe: 10% shows up in all kinds of spiritual traditions and books, so I’d go with that. www.miraclescoaching.com 94 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. You can give more and some people do, but I would caution people that, if you give less than 10%, it seems to me you would be telling yourself negative, limiting, poverty-oriented statements. For example, you might be saying, “Well, I don’t have enough money this week, so I’ll only give five percent, but I’ll make up for it next week.” Or, “I’m worried about my job, so I want to put more in savings, rather than give ten percent away.” You have to look really closely at these statements because they could be self-deception. As best as humanly possible, go with the 10% rule. That doesn’t mean you have to give it all to one place. You can break it up into giving two percent to somebody who inspired you, and 8% to somebody else or some organization, anything like that. This is a sensitive subject because I don’t know that anything’s written in stone, but looking at all the different traditions, they all seem to come down to that 10%, so use it as a rule of thumb. You still have to weigh all of this with what feels right to you and what is appropriate to you and your family, but on my end, I’m going to hold you to the fire a little bit and say do the 10%. It’ll open you and you’ll get the experience better. The money will come back faster, but you have to do what’s right for you. It’s not a law and you don’t have to do it.” Janeen: So challenge why you’d be unwilling to give 10%. Joe: Yes, you want to look at that. www.miraclescoaching.com 95 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. I was interviewed recently and they said, “What about people who don’t have much money, is it okay for them to give their services? Can they go and volunteer someplace?” I said, “Yes, you can give your services. Yes, you can donate your time, but it’s a cop out to think you can’t give money, too.” You always have money. If it’s a dollar, give a dime. It’s so easy for us to con ourselves. In fact, we con ourselves sooner than anybody else because we do it on this unconscious level. We don’t even see we’re doing it. We rationalize what we’re doing and we say, “I don’t have the money so I’m going to keep my five dollars to myself.” No, no, no, you really have to awaken. I believe that’s the goal of life – to awaken to our Divinity and power – and one way to do it is to watch what we’re telling ourselves. Watch what you’re doing in your actions and make sure that this is coming from the highest spiritual, most loving place. If somebody has a dollar and they say they can’t give it away, they’re lying to themselves because they could give 10% of it. They can afford the dime. Again, it’s all up to you. I’m asking you to look at your thoughts, beliefs, and behavior. The good news is if you do this with a Miracles Coach, you’ve got leverage. You can get clear. Janeen: So it’s about your power, something we work on at Miracles Coaching™. One of our students asked, “The ego lies to me and tells me I’m powerless, then I feel weak. I choose to feel powerful, however, I don’t feel it when I simply say, ‘I am powerful.’ How can I start feeling it? I can’t Nevillize if I can’t feel.” www.miraclescoaching.com 96 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Do you have any ideas on how a person can overcome powerlessness and begin to feel powerful? Joe: If you notice the language in that question, they’re talking about a voice that’s talking to them and they’re listening to it, which suggests they’re separate from the voice. In other words, when that person says, “My ego tells me I am powerless,” the “I” that she’s referring to is her power source – and she’s saying, “My ego tells me.” No, the “me” in that sentence is your power source and you have choice. You can listen to whatever you’re calling your ego and what it’s telling you – or you can just say, “Oh, there’s that old programming still chattering. I’ll have to talk to my Miracles Coach about the best way to delete that.” Then you’re separate from it. The key here is that we all have these little voices in our head, or subpersonalities, according to psychology. You might call one of those subpersonalities your ego, one of them a complainer, another your cheerleader even, but who’s the person who experiences all of the sub-personalities? That’s your core, what some traditions call the “witness” that is your source of power. The more you can identify with this witness, this source of power, the more you’ll realize that these voices you hear are just programs that came throughout your life. You were born and as you started to hear your parents, maybe they said you were powerless. Or perhaps you heard it in school. Somewhere you heard it and started to believe it. You created a sub-personality, but that’s not you. You are still separate from it. www.miraclescoaching.com 97 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. As a type of meditation, sit quietly and, as you’re listening to those voices going on in your head, at a certain point you’ll realize you are not your voices, you are not your thoughts, you are not your feelings. In fact, you’re not even your body. You are in all of this and experiencing all of this. You identify and realize that you’re the witness, the core, or the background to all of this. In some traditions, they say thoughts are like clouds that go by in your awareness, but your awareness is the sky. When you start to realize you’re the sky behind all of this, now you’re closer to feeling and being one with that source of power. Instead of wrestling with the voices, just realize, “Oh, they’re just kids mouthing off and I don’t have to take that.” Janeen: So we’re empowered to simply make a choice, not to listen to that voice. Joe: Yes, and, in fact, you can create a cheerleader if you want. Many of us have critical voices that say things like, “You can’t do that, you’re dumb, you’re powerless,” or, “That’s dumb.” We all hate that. We’ve all heard that, but you can turn it off. In my own case, I either turned it off or got rid of it because I now have a voice that says, “You can do that, go for it, Joe, you can learn anything.” A year ago I didn’t play guitar, I didn’t write songs – and now I’ve got three CDs and a fourth one coming out. How’d I do this? It’s because I have a cheerleader that is urging me on. If there’s any negativity, I take a glance at it and say, “Oh, you’re not welcome here,” and let it go. www.miraclescoaching.com 98 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Treat it as a meditation. Don’t be hard on yourself. Just relax, breathe, and gently experience whatever you’re thinking, feeling, and believing. Notice that you’re experiencing all of them, but you aren’t them. You’re separate from it. This is a tremendously freeing insight. It empowers you. You are free when you realize that you are not those thoughts, or that it’s your ego. Janeen: So we can simply disassociate from those voices, rather than all the other processes we go through to try and tame the voices in our heads. This seems so much easier. Joe: As I wrote in The Awakening Course, we want to get to the point where we realize we are this Divinity. You’re actually spirit or source – the witness. You’re not the thoughts you think. You’re separate from them. You observe them for a reason. You observe them because you’re not them. Janeen: That’s very freeing. Can we apply this to health? We have a student who has a chronic health issue going on and has asked for ideas on how to heal their arthritis. Joe: www.miraclescoaching.com 99 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. The basis of everything I do and teach is the five steps in The Attractor Factor. The first step is to know what you don’t want. That’s useful information. In this case you’d say, “I have arthritis, I don’t want it.” The second step is to declare your intention. Turn your first step, what you said you don’t want, 180 degrees around and declare a very clear intention. “I want to be able to walk without pain,” or “I want to be able to be healthy and happy and doing whatever it is that I feel like doing at any particular moment.” You want to state it in the positive, so stay away from the word arthritis, which can be loaded for people. You don’t want to say, “I want to get rid of my arthritis,” because then you’re still dealing with a negative statement. You want to make a very clear statement about radiant health, happiness, freedom of movement, or whatever the phrase is. The intention is what that person needs to declare, and it needs to be something that resonates with him or her. As soon as you declare that intention, heaven and earth will begin to move to help you achieve it. You’ll run into people, books, courses, doctors, therapists, or a certain therapy, or maybe you’ll discover something on the internet. The point is that something will come along that’ll help you resolve the issue. Your new intention will take you in the direction of fulfilling it. But, if you keep thinking about arthritis, you’re going to keep pulling in experiences that reinforce what you’re thinking about. That’s the nature of the Law of Attraction. So in step two, declare your intention. The third step is to get clear, which means getting clear of any beliefs that may come up. Because, once you declare something new, you’ll have thoughts www.miraclescoaching.com 100 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. like, “Oh, that’s not possible. There’s no cure for arthritis. It’ll never happen for me. I’m too old. I’m too fat. I’m too thin. I’m too whatever.” All of those are limiting negative beliefs. Sometimes releasing them is as easy as saying, “Do I really believe that that’s not possible? Do I really believe it’s not possible to heal myself of arthritis?” You might answer, “No, I actually believe it’s possible,” and you’re done. If it seems to hang on, talk to your Miracles Coach. You have an ally here, somebody to help you get through this. The fourth step is Nevillize your goal. Visualize yourself already walking and moving. Do your intention as if it’s already come to pass. It’s not in the future, it’s now. You are healed, you are walking, you’re dancing, singing, whatever it is that you want to do that shows you no longer have arthritis. In the fifth step, it’s all about letting go and taking inspired action. You have to let go of any addiction, attachment, or feeling of dependence regarding this intention, or needing it to work out right now, this minute. Trust and have faith. Big words, I know. Trust and have faith that you’re in the process of the healing, and then take inspired action on any intuitions or opportunities that come to you. If you get inspired to go on Google and type in arthritis or arthritic cure, do it. You might find there’s something there that’ll be particularly useful to you. By following these five steps, and especially working with your Miracles Coach at the same time, you can be lead to the very remedy that you’re looking for. In fact, you might even be the person that actually comes up with a remedy. With your intention and clearing, you might actually create or generate some sort of way to heal it. You could become an entrepreneur who’s selling that very same cure to others. Just know there’s always a way. www.miraclescoaching.com 101 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Janeen: They could find the remedy and get rich. Joe: Why not? It’s possible. Janeen: So looking for the solution can be potentially profitable – even a part of what helps them to accomplish their life goals. Joe: The experience they have with arthritis could be one of the greatest gifts they’ve ever experienced. Janeen: That’s a beautiful way to think of it because then you’re not against it. You’re not angry that you have arthritis. Joe: Right, you don’t want to argue with your reality. Arguing with your reality just creates a friction. No matter what the issue, whether it’s money, health, or romance, you don’t want to argue with it. You face current reality, and then ask yourself, “How would I like it to be?” From there you can start to move in the direction of creating your new reality, but fighting with the www.miraclescoaching.com 102 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. current one will just put you in stress, make you unhappy, generate really low feelings, and your energy will drop. The Law of Attraction will still kick in and you’ll attract moments more of what you don’t want. You want to attract the moments of magic and miracles. So focus on, “How do I want it to be? I know what this reality is, how do I want it to be?” and start to move in that new direction. Janeen: Focusing on what you currently have – arthritis – and being mad about it will only create more anger and more arthritis. Joe: It might even be worth asking, “What’s the gift in this? What is the great gift that I haven’t acknowledged?” Janeen: The emotional body manifests whatever it’s holding onto in our physical bodies, so if the emotional body is holding any kind of rigidity, then it would manifest as rigid joints. Joe: That’s a very good point. Janeen: www.miraclescoaching.com 103 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. As a coach, I would ask them, “Are you holding on to one right way to be, some kind of rigidity in your life?” Maybe they may have an unforgiving attitude towards someone. In Hinduism, there is a thought process that says grace that is unearned, or undeserved favor of the universe, flows through the parents. Your health flows from the mother’s line and your finances flow from the father’s line. Following that line of thinking, someone with arthritis could ask, “How do I feel toward my mother and everyone on my mother’s side of the family?” See if there’s anything they’re holding onto that would keep their joints rigid. Joe: Anything that helps people explore their inner world is going to be priceless. You mentioned forgiveness. I believe it was Wayne Dyer who said, “If there is a lack anywhere in your life, it is due to a lack of forgiveness.” Forgiveness isn’t just about forgiving others – more powerfully, it’s usually forgiving yourself. When you forgive yourself for any perceived wrongdoing or wrong thinking, you can expand your life and get the flow going. That’s when things open up, any and all areas, whether it’s romance, health, physical well-being, or finances. So ask yourself, “Where in my life am I still holding on to a grudge against myself or another person?” I was reading a book on the cure for cancer by a Chinese medical doctor, who says that people would actually cure cancer in themselves if they faced their life and admitted where they had not forgiven themselves or others. He said this is where there’ve been healings, cures, and transformations. But people who held on www.miraclescoaching.com 104 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. and didn’t want to forgive, let go, or say, “I’m sorry,” often just maintained their illness right through death. This is how powerful forgiveness is. Janeen: And when you’re willing to offer that forgiveness, it doesn’t matter how the other person responds. You get the grace, that undeserved, unearned favor, simply because you let go of that toward them. The energy inside you is the issue. Joe: It’s all about how you’re feeling. When you release that feeling, it doesn’t matter if the other person is saying, “I forgive you,” “I acknowledge you,” or “Thank you.” What matters is what you’re doing to release your energy in you. That’s it. Janeen: That’s wherein the healing lies. Joe, thank you so much for teaching us these beautiful principles, and for joining us here today. Joe: Thank you, Janeen, and God speed to all of you. www.miraclescoaching.com 105 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Secret Session #6 Joe Vitale with Gregory Downey Gregory: Joe, welcome. Joe: Thank you, Gregory. Would you like to get started with a moment of gratitude? Gregory: That would be perfect. Tonight I’m feeling especially grateful for my wife. I’ve had the privilege of caring for her today as she’s been ill, and helping out with my children. Without my wife, I would be less than the individual that I am. I’m grateful for her smile. I’m grateful for her radiance and her patience. I’m grateful for her personality, her love, and her compassion. I’m grateful for her belief and her support. I’m grateful for moments of silence, moments of conversation, and moments of laughter. I’m grateful for the way she looks at me when she wants to give me the signal that I’m out of line, and the way she looks at me when she wants me to know that she’s absolutely madly and deeply in love with me. I’m grateful for the way she nurtures our children, the way she www.miraclescoaching.com 106 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. educates them, and the way she is the glue for our entire family. I’m grateful for my wonderful wife. Joe: We can all look inside and around ourselves at any time to find something to feel grateful for. Pick anything. For example, it could be the bottle of water I’m seeing in this moment, a reminder of how vital water is to me. Humans are about 70% water, and most of the planet is water, so I need to hydrate and keep fluids in my body. I’m grateful I have this water available for health. It’s a great reminder of life, Divinity, and everything to be grateful for. Anyone can do this right now. Just look around. It could be for your own life. Maybe it’s for Miracles Coaching™, or a pet wandering around in your vicinity. Perhaps you’re grateful for the weather. I don’t know what it is for you, but gratitude is powerful. It will transform your entire life, and bring you right here, into the moment. This is the big secret – that this moment is all there is. When you’re in this moment with gratitude, you experience the very miracle you’ve been looking for. It’s right here, not in the past and not in the future. It’s in this moment, and gratitude brings you to it. Gregory: And when we’re in tune with this moment, that’s when we can receive inspiration. How can someone tell the difference between Divine inspiration and their “human” self? Janeen, one of the Miracles Coaches, has said that our ego voice is www.miraclescoaching.com 107 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. an exterior pressure to do something, whereas the Divine voice is something you want that wells up inside you. Is that a good description? Joe: Yes, and I’d take it a step further. Everything is inside you, the entire experience of your life, including everything that comes into your experience – other people, commercials, advertisements, TV, work, home – everything. You experience it in you. Looking at it from a unity, psycho-spiritual aspect, there isn’t anything on the outside of you. Everything you see on the outside is a projection of what’s inside of you. Internally, things will bubble up within you, calling you to act on them, or you may have what appears to be things showing up on the outside beckoning you to go in their direction. How do you know what to do? Dr. Hew Len, the co-author of Zero Limits who taught me Ho’oponopono, said, “You don’t always know the difference. It’s very easy to be confused or swayed in one direction or another.” He said to clean, clear, or pray on any impulse that shows up, whether you think it’s from the ego or the Divine. He uses the Ho’oponopono clearing process, repeating the phrases, “I’m sorry, please forgive me, thank you, I love you.” If the impulse remains after some undetermined amount of time (it could be three times, it could be three days), he assumes it’s coming from inspiration, the Divine. I do something similar when I get an impulse to do something, such as record another CD, write a book, or do a seminar. If these things knock at my inner door, I ask, “Is this coming from my ego wanting to brag about having another book or is this coming from the Divine, inspiring me with another book idea?” I sit www.miraclescoaching.com 108 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. with it and I try to sense if this coming from my heart or from my head. It’s an important distinction. We can all do this. It’s just a matter of turning off your phone, getting quiet, slowing down your breathing, relaxing a little bit, maybe walking off into the woods and sitting on a tree stump. Sit with the impulse from that place inside yourself and see if you can feel the impulse in your body. Try to identify where it’s located. Is it coming from your head? Does it seem to be around your brain or behind your eyes? Or does it seem to be coming from something deeper and lower, like in your heart, chest, or even lower in my stomach? In some martial arts, and in Chinese philosophy, they say the center of your mind is actually about where your belly button is. We confuse the center of our mind with where our brain is, so it can be helpful and valuable to get a sense of how the impulse relates to your body. When I use this technique, I want it to come from my belly or heart area, which is more in tune with the earth and Divinity. If it’s coming from my head, it’s not right or wrong, but suggests it may be coming more from ego than inspiration. So I check in, “Here’s the feeling. I don’t know if it’s inspiration or ego.” Then, like Dr. Hew Len, I’ll clear on it, “I love you, I’m sorry, please forgive me, thank you.” After the dust settles, I’m usually pretty clear which way to go. Essentially, you’re learning to fine tune your sensitivity. If you’re in Miracles Coaching™, bounce these ideas off your coach, because getting objective feedback can help you decide if this is the way to go. Gregory: www.miraclescoaching.com 109 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. So if something is Divine, it’ll stay. In other words, if you’re trying to clear on something that is actually positive or meant for you, and it’s a good feeling, you won’t clear it. Joe: If I’m cleaning and clearing and the impulse is still there, then that’s the way to go, and I’ll say, “Okay, that’s the one to do, that’s what to do next.” Gregory: Can you describe a few different ways for alleviating physical pain? Joe: The first thing is go to the doctor if you need to. So many people dismiss the obvious because they’re looking for a magic bullet, but I know that if I’m in extreme pain, and depending on what is happening or how extreme it is, I’m either going to the emergency room or to a family physician. It’s wisdom to use resources available for us. I don’t want to dismiss them thinking, “Oh, I should be using my brain power, or my spirit power, or I should be praying my way out of this.” Yes, I may do those, too, but sometimes an answer to a prayer is a doctor. Medicine is there for a reason. That being said, outside of an emergency, I like to experiment with healing techniques I’ve learned to do before going to a doctor. I’ve rid myself of a lot of pain through some of these, which I discuss in my audios and books, like The Key. For example, if I have a headache, I use a technique I learned decades ago that has always worked for me. In fact, I first used this technique to help my wife, www.miraclescoaching.com 110 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. who has since passed away. She would get terrible headaches, and you could tell just by looking at her face. I would ask her two rounds of the questions, which took about two minutes, and by the third time, she’d smile and said, “It’s gone, it’s gone.” The technique is simple. Using your imagination, the first thing is to ask questions, either out loud to someone, or in your mind: What color is it? Red, yellow, gray, black, blue, or something else? How much does it weigh? How heavy is my headache? If I could measure it with a ruler, how wide, long, and deep is it? If I could smell the headache, what does it smell like? Circulate through those questions, and any other questions that keep you focused on the headache. While it sounds like it would make your headache worse, it actually makes it go away, according to a theory that pain is simply trying to get your attention. Once you give it that, the pain begins to evaporate and disappear. There are all kinds of techniques that involve paying attention to what’s bothering you, because what’s bothering you is actually trying to tell you something. It wants your attention. You can also directly ask why the pain is there to begin with, and ask it to reveal its lesson to you. Gregory: I’m sure it has many different applications. You could probably apply this to stress or to anxiety, as well – as long as it’s not something life threatening. www.miraclescoaching.com 111 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Are there different ways to alleviate emotional pain, or would they be the same? Joe: They’re the same to me. An emotional pain is another energy field in your body that’s asking you to pay attention to it. The great lesson in all of this, whether you’re dealing with emotional or physical pain, is that there are messages trying to be delivered. Most of the time, we don’t listen – so the pain gets worse. It gets stronger, louder, and more persistent because it’s trying to get our attention. When we give it attention, it starts to go away. Recently I was reading about cancer patients who had seen therapists as a last resort, after trying natural methods and chemotherapy. The therapist would ask them to focus on their pain, or on the cancer, and actually talk to it. Again, this involves using your imagination. It may not verbally say anything, but you’ll get some sort of impression of a message. A lot of the messages had to do with love and forgiveness, letting go of resentment, grief or aggravation. The more people moved towards totally forgiving themselves, which is always the biggie, and then forgiving anybody else for perceived misjudgments, the pain would start to alleviate. This included emotional pain, as well. So pay attention to the messages. Gregory: Forgiving ourselves definitely frees up a lot of energy. www.miraclescoaching.com 112 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Let’s shift gears and talk about money. Lately, I’ve had a lot of students ask, “How do I Nevillize when I know I’m dead broke and feel panicked?” Could you describe how a person can feel like they have money when they’re clearly broke? Joe: It’s far easier than you think. When you’re stuck in the energy of the feeling of being broke, you have to look past it. Of course, it feels like you can’t do it because you’re really stuck in the muck in that moment. I suggest reading wealth-oriented magazines and biographies of wealthy people, as well as watching documentary movies like that, to help you take on the feeling of already having wealth. The most important thing to remind yourself is that whatever is going on right now is temporary. No matter what experience you’re having in this moment, it’s going to pass. Remind yourself that this is current reality and current reality will change. It always does – that’s the nature of life – and it’s going to change by itself. Can you accelerate it? Yes, and that’s what Miracles Coaching™ is designed to do. So when somebody says, “I am broke. I can’t imagine being wealthy,” they’ve got to pause and say, “Is it always going to be like this? No, it’s not. In fact, it’s impossible for it to always be like this because the nature of life is always to change. It is going to change.” You shake loose those little handcuffs on your mind that say, “I’m broke and I’m always going to be broke,” and begin to realize, “Well, of course it’s not always going to be like this. It’s going to get better. I may not know how and I may not know when, but it will get better.” www.miraclescoaching.com 113 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Begin imagining the time when it is better. Maybe you imagine yourself talking to a wealthy person you’ve read about, or perhaps you’re featured in one of the wealth magazines. You could begin acting like someone you admired in a documentary, or imagine yourself walking around in a great suit or dress you saw in a high end catalogue. After you’ve shaken off the mental cement of thinking, “Oh, this is where I am and it’s always going to be that way,” this is when you begin Nevillizing. If you do everything being asked of you in Miracles Coaching™ and you talk to your Miracles Coach, you’re going to accelerate the process. You’ll go in the correct direction. So remind yourself, “It’s not going to stay like this.” Gregory: When I have a student struggling with this, I’ll ask, “Let’s say you have the money, what does that look like? Are you buying a new house or car? Can you see yourself waking up in the morning and putting your feet down on the custom floor you’ve picked out? Can you see yourself walking down the stairs into the custom kitchen you’ve designed? What does it look like for you? Describe it in detail.” As they begin to draw that picture in words, they think, “Okay, this is it,” and start feeling it. Joe: That’s a great exercise and demonstrates how easy it is to expand your mind about wealth consciousness. www.miraclescoaching.com 114 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Also, for people who are wrestling with money or feeling broke, I’ve got a free book called Attract Money Now, which you can download at www.attractmoneynow.com. Gregory: What if someone’s running into a lot of obstacles in their life? For example, one of my students is having trouble getting his web business up and running. He said, “I’ve been positive in believing, but everything seems to be going wrong. The website designer isn’t coming through. The e-mail campaign didn’t produce anything. My bank held a check too long and bounced my account. I’m going crazy with all these problems. What am I doing wrong?” Joe: He’s not doing anything wrong. When you start to pursue your dreams, anything that’s in the way of it is going to bubble to the surface. This is good news, because it means that if you have any negative beliefs, if you have any doubts, if you have any fears, they’re going to show up. They’re showing up because they’re ready to be erased and removed, cleaned and cleared, and just taken out of your life. Every single business person I’ve ever met, talked to, or read about, including myself, have all made attempts just like this person is describing. Sometimes it feels like, “That didn’t work and I didn’t get the results I wanted. It’s beginning to feel like everything’s stacked against me and it’s never going to work.” The secret to their success is they went on and did the next thing anyway. They learned from what was going on. www.miraclescoaching.com 115 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. For example, when that person said they did an e-mail campaign and there was nothing, that’s not true. They got priceless feedback. Maybe the feedback said they need to tailor, change, or remold what they’re selling, or that particular e-mail approach didn’t work and you have to try something different. There is no such thing as failure. It’s all feedback. I know it feels like failure sometimes, but take a deep breath and say, “What did I learn from this?” Let me give you a concrete example. I was reminiscing with my music producer recently about how we met six years ago, when a mutual friend volunteered his band to play at a publicity event I put on. As it turned out, the event did not go as well as I wanted in terms of people, media, or books sold. You could say, “Well, that was a failure,” but I never called it that. I learned from it and said, “I have to do it on a different day, send out a different press release, and do such and such.” It looked like a failure, but I saw it as feedback. Yet something even bigger took place, although I didn’t see it until five years later when I ran into my friend, the lead singer from the band. We decided to go to lunch, and that’s when he shared his new business with me where he trains people how to be musicians in a year-long program, helping them with their songs, singing, and producing their first CD. He didn’t know I wanted that exact service, and I didn’t know that he was going to provide it when we met for lunch. We were there to reminisce, share, be friends, and catch up. The seed, though, had been planted five years before at an event that I could have perceived as a failure. You have no idea exactly what happens when you go and take some effort in the direction of making your dreams come true. Part of what happens is any www.miraclescoaching.com 116 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. negative beliefs come to the surface. Great, that’s a chance for you to erase them. Another part of it is that you get direct feedback on a business model that may need to be changed, adapted, or rewritten. The last part is you may be making connections, or planting seeds, and you won’t see the fruit of it for a year or two, or in my case, five or six years later. There is so much that’s happening, you can’t say nothing happened or it all failed. That is not accurate. Gregory: What if someone is feeling a lot of anxiety? Is it just a case of being out of the moment – and, if so, how can they get back in the moment and stop worrying all the time? Joe: The first thing is remind yourself you’re not worrying all the time. If you were, you’d be walking into walls. You wouldn’t be able to function. It’s so easy to deceive ourselves and go into self-sabotage, thinking that because you’re worrying about something, you’re “worrying all the time.” True, there might be some moments where fear kicks in and you’re wondering, “What’s going to work out? How are things going to get paid? When am I going to get a particular phone call?” But that’s just the human mind – it works in that kind of survival-oriented way, trying to protect you. One way around it is to remind yourself you’re totally fine. Here’s the major key: Look in this moment, get back to this moment. Touch your desk. If you’re driving, touch the dashboard, or touch the phone. Physical www.miraclescoaching.com 117 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. touching helps bring you back in the moment. The more you can be in this moment and relax, the more you’re going to disconnect the worrying mind. Then start to focus your mind on gratitude. You can begin anywhere. I talk about this in the movie called The Compass, where I hold up a pencil. At first, I’m not really grateful and making it up, but by the time I’ve explored all the reasons to be grateful for a pencil, I’m truly in gratitude, which means I’m back in the moment. Reminding yourself that all is well, that you have things to be grateful for, and you’re in this moment doing the right things – being in Miracles Coaching™, taking action, going in the direction of your dreams – all of these things can help disconnect that hardwired worrying system. Gregory: And the amazing thing is it only takes two or three minutes of focusing on your breath to get back in the moment and be mindful of where you are. Just experiencing your breath and being human is a wonderful way to decompress, realign, and refocus. I also sometimes recommend to students that they take some time to listen to your album, Aligning to Zero. Most of those tracks are between four and six minutes, and it’s a great way to do some clearing and be reminded of the moment. What about relationships? Do you offer any resources for meeting better friends? One of my students said, “I need new friends. I am upper middle class now, but all my friends have been poor or broke people. I love them, but I feel like I need a group that’s a step up on the socioeconomic ladder from me.” www.miraclescoaching.com 118 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Joe: This question surprises me because there are so many opportunities and ways to meet people today – the internet, church groups, civic groups, Rotary Clubs, Kiwanis Clubs, school meetings. Take some time to reflect on what you love to do, your hobbies, your experiences, and education. No matter what it is, you’ll find groups everywhere on the internet. You name it, there’s a group for it. And, of course, Facebook is famous for connecting people. If you want to do it in or near your hometown, start looking at civic communities or church groups there, or other functions. You could even volunteer at some shelters and meet people making a difference. Wealthy people often show up there because they want to give back, contribute, and volunteer. Gregory: There’s a wonderful website called www.meetup.com in just about every community. In fact, they have a Law of Attraction meet-up group that meets regularly where I live. It’s a wonderful resource. They could also join a local professional networking group, or look online for mastermind groups Joe: Bill Hibbler and I wrote a book together called Meet and Grow Rich, which explains how to build your own mastermind group – how to find and attract the people to get into it, and how to run it. It’s a complete, definitive book – the only one I know about how to put together your own mastermind group. www.miraclescoaching.com 119 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Gregory: What would you say to someone who doesn’t understand their role or responsibility in creating a relationship that doesn’t work? For example, what if someone feels like, “I just can’t understand how I’m responsible for my creepy ex-wife taking all my money and divorcing me. I loved her and did everything for her. I know that I’m in victimhood, but I can’t seem to get out of it because I can’t comprehend how I am responsible for that.” Joe: There’s a key distinction between blame and responsibility, and people often confuse them. They end up blaming themselves and feeling guilty for what took place, but when you do that, you’re torturing yourself unnecessarily. It’s not helpful, or going to shed any light on the situation. Responsibility is different. It’s a clear awareness that in some way, shape or form, unconsciously, you participated in a dance in that relationship. I’m purposely stressing the word unconsciously because, as we’re discovering in the field of neuroscience and neuroplasticity, we know very little about our own behavior. Ninety nine percent of what we do and think, and how we behave, is driven by our unconscious mind. Our conscious mind is the tip of the iceberg – even though we think it’s running the show of our life. It’s not, and why it’s so important to realize that whatever is going on in your life – good, bad or indifferent – is probably stemming from beliefs in your unconscious mind. So when you’re in a relationship that doesn’t end in such a happy-go-lucky way, it’s not a matter of blaming yourself, blaming him, her, or anybody else. It’s a www.miraclescoaching.com 120 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. matter of realizing you had some beliefs in your unconscious mind that attracted the situation. We can learn from it, release those beliefs, and go on to a happier relationship. When you look at it in this neutral way, it’s a healthier way to part and grow. If you look at it like, “I did this to myself. What kind of an idiot am I? I feel guilty and stupid,” you’re not going to learn anything. In fact, you’ll stay the victim. If you want to get out of victimhood you’ve got to look at responsibility as an awareness tool. That’s the best way to get out of it and make sure it doesn’t happen again. Gregory: One of the things I encourage people to do to help them get realigned and find balance is to make a “bucket list.” It doesn’t have to be anything that’s expensive or elaborate. Just write down things you’ve always wanted to do that could bring balance into your life. I’ve even suggested going out and feeding the ducks. I’ll ask, “When was the last time you fed the ducks or camped out overnight and watched the stars? When was the last time you had a weenie roast?” It seems that when we’re trying to attract money and work a regular job, we have all these things going and get so caught up in what it is we’re chasing, we forget to be in the moment. If you were to make a summer bucket list, what are some things that you would put on the list? www.miraclescoaching.com 121 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Joe: That’s a juicy question, and my first answer is, “I’m already doing it.” I’m pursuing music, which was on my bucket list for the longest time. I’ve put three CDs out in one year, a fourth one I’m working on, and I’m having a blast. Next up is performing. Even though I’ve been on stage a lot, and played harmonica on the stage, I’ve never sang my own songs, or played the guitar, except for a couple of friends. That’s on the bucket list and I will be doing it, guaranteed. I’ll also be announcing a Hypnotic Marketing Secret Retreat in my area probably later this year, which I haven’t done in ten years, where I’ll reveal all my marketing and copywriting secrets, things I’ve been doing in my business for decades. On a more playful note, I’ve never gone hot air ballooning, and I think that would be cool. I’ve never done the zip line, either, and we’ve got one five miles from where I live. I’d also like to go to a drive-in theater. I don’t remember the last time I did that, except as a kid. I don’t even know if they’re still around. Speaking of theaters, there are theaters that offer full course meals and drinks while you watch a movie, and I’ve never done that. Gregory: My sons and I recently had an experience that was on our bucket list – learning about bee keeping. We put on the whole bee suit so we could watch while they opened the hives, then we expelled honey, chewed on fresh honeycomb, and separated the honey from the wax with our mouth. It was a wonderful way to forget about everything that needed to be done, and just focus on something we’ve wanted to do – experience that part of nature to www.miraclescoaching.com 122 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. better understand where food comes from. It felt abundant to observe everything and the complexity of the life of a bee. I tell students that if they’re going to have a bucket list, also keep a gratitude journal and write down how they felt – what the moment was like. And I remind them that now is the time to do things that you’ve never thought you could do before. We hear so much about the economy – but there is no better time than right now to start a business, to start doing the things you’ve always wanted to do. Joe: That’s the cool thing about a bucket list, putting all this fun stuff on it so you can experience more of life, the juice. It opens you up internally and energetically, puts you more in contact with the world, and probably relieves a whole bunch of stress. What a great gift to give yourself. Gregory: Thank you, Joe, for your time here today. Joe: Thank you, Gregory, and God speed to everyone. www.miraclescoaching.com 123 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Secret Session #7 Joe Vitale with Michelle Minzghor Michelle: Joe, welcome. We’re glad to have you with us. The question we’ll be addressing in this conversation centers around, “How do I set my intention, create an action list, set the intention of the universe, and let go of the how?” Joe: Thank you, Michelle, that’s a great question – and really, it’s the secret to attracting, creating, manifesting miracles in your life. In reality, we don’t know precisely how to accomplish anything. We trick ourselves into thinking we know, and convince ourselves of that. On one level, that’s fine, but in order to accomplish some of the bigger things that we want in our life, we have to have this state of letting go. As many of you know, I’ve become a musician, yet just a short time ago I did not call myself that. I was interested in music, but had never written a song or performed in public, and couldn’t carry a tune. I might have known three cords on the guitar. I did play a little harmonica and from time to time, but that’s a campfire instrument and an easy thing to play. A year and a half ago I was looking at my life and what I wanted to do next, and realized I had a latent desire for music. I’d been buying guitars over the years, but they were more like works of art to look at. I didn’t really play them. So I set the intention that I wanted to create music, be a musician, and record an album. www.miraclescoaching.com 124 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. As I said it, I didn’t know where to start or how to get to the end result, so the first thing I did was start doing a little research. I went to Amazon and typed in musician, how to play the guitar, or how to write a song. I began gathering information, which kept leading me to another book or another product. I came across the software program called “Master Writer” that a lot of musicians use to write their songs. Then, a couple of famous musicians I know endorsed it, so I bought it. Take a moment to consider all this. When I said I wanted to be a musician, I didn’t know that there was something called “Master Writer.” I didn’t know what the different books were or which books would be the right ones to get me where I wanted to go. The important thing is I took steps once I set the intention to be a musician, and I did whatever seemed like the obvious next step. Obviously it’s not the final step, or even the step that’s going to make me a musician. It’s a step along the way. It’s like picking up breadcrumbs. I go to Amazon. I buy some books. I buy some audios. I poke around on the internet. I start asking people who teaches guitar, who does this, who does that. Along the way, someone who helped me out with a publicity project six years ago shows up in my life. Out of the blue he sends me an e-mail about getting together for lunch. This wasn’t orchestrated. It wasn’t something I knew to do or part of my “how to become a musician.” It was something that came out of the universe as a result of me saying, “I want to be a musician.” It turned out that he had just started a business where he helps people write, produce, record, and create their first album. There’s no way I could have projected or predicted that. It simply came out of declaring my intention, and then www.miraclescoaching.com 125 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. following the breadcrumbs, saying “yes” to different leads, including lunch with this guy, who turns out to be somebody who can actually hold my hand through the process. When we got together for that lunch, neither he nor I knew what the other was up to. He didn’t know I had an interest in music, or had set an intention. I didn’t know he had just started a business. This demonstrates why we don’t need to know the specifics on how to get something done – by taking action it evolves and unfolds. At this point I’ve got multiple CDs produced, and have been on the cover of magazines with them. I’ve been in Rolling Stone® magazine. In a couple of weeks I’m going into the studio to create my next singer-songwriter CD. I did all of this without knowing how to do it. Michelle: That’s amazing. Does it work for everything, for example, on a community level? Joe: Yes, and in fact, in my book, Attract Money Now, Step 7 is to do something big for your community. I started working on that level, too, when a few years ago I decided I wanted to do something for my country. I had been homeless at one point in my life, and kept thinking, “I want to do something for people who are either homeless or about to be.” I got this wild idea to start Operation Yes, a movement to end homelessness in United States. The “yes” stands for “Your Economic Solution.” www.miraclescoaching.com 126 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Think about this. Again, I’m going to do something that has never been done before, daring something worthy. I’m thinking to myself, “Okay, I want to end homelessness, but I don’t know how.” I have a goal, and I know to do a couple of things. I put up a website at www.operationyes.com, and started researching to see what’s already been done on ending poverty, stopping foreclosures, and how the system handled people who are homeless. I knew to do a few basic steps, but I didn’t know how to get to the point where I could actually pull off something like this, so I go about my business. One day I was at the airport wandering around a bookstore, one of my favorite things to do, and see a book on the shelf at eye-to-eye level, written by a guy who is ending poverty. I thought, “Oh, my God. This is perfect.” I bought the book and devoured it on the plane. As soon as I landed, I reached out to the writer, Scott Miller, who is president of an organization called Move the Mountain [www.movethemountain.org]. He’s been working in this area for years, and has developed a tested system and program for ending poverty. As I began networking with him, I thought, “Okay, I want to do something really big. I have an idea for a 3-step program that could effectively end homelessness in one day, if I can get those three elements across.” The first element is helping people with their self-esteem, because I know that homeless people feel hopeless. The second is to help them have an entrepreneurial mindset, which moves them out of being a victim. Finally, the third is to teach them how to do internet marketing – because I think anybody can get to a computer. Even homeless people can get access to a computer through the library or schools, and if I do it right, I can find computers to be donated to different people. www.miraclescoaching.com 127 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. So as this continues coming together, all the while I don’t know how to end homelessness. I just keep going through the process of following leads, buying a book, making a phone call, sending an e-mail, and checking out the website. I meditate, pray, reflect, and keep taking action. It all began with me saying, “I want to end homelessness,” without having a clue how to go about something like that. What I did know, though, is that having a dream, a vision, an inspiration, or an intention, begins the process. Michelle: I read a book called Drawing on the Powers of Heaven, by Grant Von Harrison, that says we have to have pure motive. In other words, we need to center intentions to the universe. We need to create it spiritually first. Everything has to be created internally before it can be created physically, and setting an intention is how we do that. I set my intention and speak to the universe about what I desire, and then use my own common sense, which God gave me, to try to come with the how. I make an action list and start doing those little steps. I like to use the phrase “creating it physically” – referring to my part in getting it to fruition. As the universe witnesses our actions, contacts come into flow and books come into evidence with us. All sorts of things happen to keep that ball rolling. Joe: That’s really how it works, although we all want the security of having a roadmap in front of us that says, “Do A, then B, then C, then D, and then you’ll end up at Z.” www.miraclescoaching.com 128 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. But the reality of life is not like this, and why how-to books don’t work for everybody. Everybody is different, every situation is different, and every moment changes. What worked in 1935 may not work right now, so we have to have trust and faith when we establish our inspiration and intention. You say, “This is what I want. This is what I want to attract, achieve, manifest. This is the difference I want to make.” That’s the seed. After you’ve planted your seed, you begin taking whatever actions you’re inspired to take around it. As you take those actions, new actions and opportunities, unfold – but you won’t see those actions down the road until you begin the trek. It’s like if I get in my car and there’s an accident down the road, a detour, or a new road being built, I’ll discover it in the process of driving. So we want to have an intention and start taking action knowing what our end result is – the goal, intention, inspiration, or miracle we want. The bigger the goal, like when I stated that I wanted to end homelessness, the cloudier how to get there will be, but the clouds part, the sun shines, and the skies get clearer as you start moving towards it. Michelle: How would we have the opportunity to learn and grow, or refine ourselves, if the roadmap said, “Go a hundred miles, turn left, go twenty miles, and turn right?” We wouldn’t learn to trust and have faith in a higher power, whether you call it the universe, God, or the Divine. Joe: It’s more fun this way – it has a sense of surprise. www.miraclescoaching.com 129 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. I still remember the moment in the airport bookstore when I saw that book on ending poverty right at my eye level. I was jarred in the most exquisitely wonderful way. Part of me was even confused because I thought, “I already did a search on Amazon. How come this book didn’t show up?” And then another part of me said, “The Divine put this book here.” Why not? After all, there aren’t that many books in an airport bookstore; it’s not like Amazon. What are the chances an airport bookstore would have a book on ending poverty, which I happened to see at eye level? If it had been at knee level I might not have seen it. So that’s what I mean by a sense of surprise – and that surprise tells me I’m on the right path. It’s a sign or clue that the universe is watching my back, that God is saying, “Hey, this is the next breadcrumb. Pick this book up. Read this book. Get whatever value is in it and then reach out to the author.” I followed each step as it presented itself, and not only did Scott and I become friends, we ended up doing a workshop together – none of which I could have foreseen. Michelle: Both setting your intent to the universe and taking inspired action has to coexist together for us to be able to create what we want out of life. In the book I mentioned earlier, Drawing on the Powers of Heaven, the author says that, “Dedication alone is not sufficient. You must request the blessing.” Inviting that higher power into our goal is part of creating it spiritually, and, when we do this, that higher power – God, the universe, the Divine – sees our dedication and effort, and does its part in moving things along, one after the other. www.miraclescoaching.com 130 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. A couple of years ago, a speaker was addressing a group of husbands and wives and said, “If you want to increase your strength in your marriage, then the person who desires it has to invite the universe, or God, into that goal – and then you alone need to come up with an action list of what you know you can do differently to get that relationship where you want it. Maybe you need to quit nagging, or say, ‘I love you,’ more often. Maybe you need to tell them how much you’re appreciative of all that they do.” This is a list that anyone can create on their own, which is all we have to do. From there, God or the universe can further inspire us or the other person in a relationship. It’s always something inside of us that’s preventing us from reaching a goal or intention, so it has to start there. When we get out of the way, the universe can do its part. Joe: I’m a big believer in taking action because life is a co-created experience. Yes, I look outside and see trees growing; I see that God, the universe, the Divine, is supporting life. It’s keeping us going, keeping things alive. Still, I have to take action to show the universe that I am willing to do whatever it takes to create whatever it is that I’ve established. So when I say that I want to be a musician, I take the steps to become a musician. Even though I don’t know all the steps, or how to get to the end result of holding a CD I’ve created in my hand, I do know the first steps, like doing some research and reading available books. www.miraclescoaching.com 131 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. As I do that, the universe watches and says, “This person really does want to do this. They’re already co-creating that manifestation. Let’s chime in and help out. I’ll give him the next clue, and best tools.” It comes from the doing. If I just sit here and say, “I want to end homelessness,” but never do anything, I would never accomplish anything. It’s in the taking of action that the way becomes clear. The road is actually being paved in front of me as I take action, even though I don’t know how to get to the end. I keep repeating this because you have to take action on what you know to do, trusting that you’re going to be supported along the way, and keeping your eyes open for the signs, clues, next steps, and opportunities. Continue to take action and seize those moments when they’re handed to you. This joint partnership of you and the Divine – you taking your action, and the Divine giving you more support – is the way you’ll get to the end result. You don’t need to know how to get there. Just follow the steps and keep working towards it. Michelle: When I’m working with my students, I teach them to have Divine centered intentions. I ask, “What is the motive behind wanting to make this extra money, or this abundance? What are you going to do with the abundance when you receive it?” For example, one of my students used Ho'oponopono to co-create manifesting a contract in her business. She is a healer, and uses both Reiki and art therapy. She wanted to take her art therapy to a different level, and reach out to geriatric patients, which was a Divine motive. www.miraclescoaching.com 132 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. She decided to start sending out a packet of information about her work to retirement and assisted living centers in her area, one a day, five days a week. She did this week after week, but wasn’t getting the results she wanted, even though she followed up with phone calls. She kept getting turned down, until one day, a retirement center said, “Yes, we are interested in learning more as to what you can do for our residents.” She met with them and they were delighted with what she wanted to do. They told her, “We would love to sign your contract right now, but it’s contingent upon a government grant coming through for our facility. So we’ll be in touch with you within a week to let you know whether that grant has come through.” We continued our coaching calls together, and the next week she got a phone call from the facility saying that their government grant had been declined, and the money wasn’t going to be available. As you can imagine, she was somewhat disgruntled and said, “Maybe I shouldn’t even continue this avenue. Maybe it’s not going to get me anywhere.” I said, “Wait a minute. There is an opportunity to do some Ho’oponopono work here. You could be clearing on behalf of the government agency that makes these financial decisions that affect the elderly, sending love, even though we don’t know who these people are. “You can send love to the government agency, to those individuals that make up the decisions for this care center, clearing on their lack of awareness of the mental stimulation and needs the elderly have. You can also send love to the end recipients, which would be the residents of this care center.” She did this for weeks. In the meantime, we let that conversation go and continued our calls, focusing our attention on other areas she was making progress www.miraclescoaching.com 133 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. in. Not long after, it was time for another coaching call, so I sat down to read a precall form we have people fill out before every session. It was all negative, and I remember thinking, “Oh, goodness, I have some work to do for her.” When we got on the call, I said, “Hello, how are you?” fully expecting a negative voice. Instead, she said, “Oh, Michelle, I’m doing great! After I filled out that pre-call form two hours ago, I got a phone call. The senior care center called and said the grant had been reissued, and they were ready to sign my contract. They want the first corridor of the building painted by May 1st because the secretary of state was coming to their facility.” That’s all about the power of co-creating, believing, and doing, even though she lost a little hope towards the end. I told her, “In a sense, you were right on the verge of success. Yes, you started downhill when that final trial came your way, but you did take action and the success came.” We celebrated together when she signed the contract, and then I said, “You still have work to do. You should continue cleaning and sending love to the government agency and the recipients, but also do clearing for yourself because you failed to stay positive. Ask forgiveness from the universe for your last couple of hours, for spiraling downhill.” She completely agreed and wanted to stay on track. Overall, it was a beautiful experience for her that gave her a monetary benefit, as well, even though she didn’t actually clear and clean on behalf of getting the job for herself. She cleared and cleaned on behalf of the end recipients. This had nothing to do with her. In the end, though, she received a signed contract worth $20,000. www.miraclescoaching.com 134 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Joe: That’s a great punch line. Michelle: Yes, it shows pure motive, making sure our intentions are Divine. Joe: I’d point out, too, that she didn’t know how it was going to unravel, or resolve itself. In fact, at one point, it looked like that particular door was closed. Even when you don’t know how, you have to trust. You still have to clean, clear, and work with your coach, doing all of the different things that come to mind. Stay the course, stay at peace, and stay in serenity as you move forward because you don’t know what’s going to happen next. Like a mantra, you need to meditate every day and say, “I don’t know. I trust, I’m taking action, but I don’t know what’s going to evolve.” “No” doesn’t matter because it can continue evolving and end up being a “Yes,” or, as in her case, $20,000. You mentioned having goals be of a Divine, generous, compassionate nature. A spiritual teacher, Jose Silva, used to say that the goal should benefit you and at least three other people. I’ve always loved that as a rule of thumb. Whenever you’re setting a goal, ask yourself, “How can this goal help three other people besides me?” The universe notices when you expand yourself to include others in an open-hearted way. Now it’s not just about you. www.miraclescoaching.com 135 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. It’s totally fine to do things for yourself – take care of, love, and appreciate yourself. You deserve it, but you can get things faster and results more quickly when you include others. Michelle: One way to know whether our intention or goal is coming from the Divine, or ego, is to ask, “Does it just benefit me, or does it benefit me as well as others?” I have another story related to cleaning and clearing, especially on one’s past. A student of mine has been working towards the state of zero, which you wrote about in Zero Limits, where we’re functioning out of love and manifestation becomes so much easier. After just a couple of weeks of doing this, she called me and said, “I have to tell you what just manifested in my life. There’s a situation in my past where I’d been holding onto anger and resentment towards some friends of mine for years because they had not repaid a large sum of money they borrowed from me. I’ve long since lost contact with them. I knew it was time to clean on it, and release myself from those feelings. “Sunday night I started using Ho'oponopono, clearing, cleaning, and sending love to this couple, asking the universe to let them know that I forgave them. I kept doing it for the last two days. Then, an hour ago you will never guess who knocked at my door.” That couple came to her in humility and apologized for avoiding their debt to her all these years. They wanted to start a payment plan and offered their first $500. She was awestruck, and she told them that she forgave them, not only of the length of time, but also the debt. She said, “I don’t want your money. I just want www.miraclescoaching.com 136 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. you to know I forgive you of this debt, and I forgive you for all the years of nonpayment. I also want you to know I no longer have any anger or animosity.” The couple said, “There must be something we can do for you.” When she told them she’d love to plant some trees in her front yard, and they reached in their pocket and gave her a $100.00 bill to buy them. Going back to letting go of “the how,” she had no idea of how this would unfold, or how she was going to be released of the anger and resentment. She just knew that if she started the ball rolling and withdrew her anger, animosity, and resentment, that God or the universe would do its part. Joe: That’s the power of forgiveness, and a great example of how it can transform in the most unexpected ways. Many spiritual teachers have said that the #1 thing you can do to unblock your energy so you can attract more of the big dreams you want is to forgive anybody for anything throughout your entire life – and, most importantly, to forgive yourself. Michelle: It’s a strong lesson for all of us, and demonstrates that it starts within us. There’s always something within us that is preventing us from manifesting our desire, and, for her, it was the anger and animosity. Imagine if she would have chosen to forgive 10 years ago? Joe: www.miraclescoaching.com 137 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Things would have manifested sooner. Whenever you hold onto anger or any sort of emotion like that, the only energy system you burn up is our own. The other people involved don’t have any idea what’s going on. Even if you were in front of them being angry, you’re the one burning up your own physiological and psychological system. The sooner we let go of any of those feelings or stuck emotions, by forgiving ourselves and others, releasing that energy, the better we feel. We return to a state of balance and alignment with the universe, and we’ll have all of the energy that has been wound up within us going forward to attract and manifest the miracles that we’re longing for. Michelle: Along the idea of setting goals in harmony with the Divine, I like this quote from Drawing on the Powers of Heaven: Goals, or our desires, of course, need to be something you are not currently achieving or something that will require a certain amount of mental exertion. Otherwise, you will not be required to use faith as a principle of power. You need to realize that the desire may not be easy to achieve, but you must maintain the faith that if you make a determined effort, that God or the universe will prepare a way for your righteous goals to be accomplished. Your success in achieving the goal will be in direct proportion to your faith and efforts, not your circumstances. Remember that the power of faith has power, dominion and authority over all things. www.miraclescoaching.com 138 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. This is a great book, and literally tells you every step you need to manifest. It supports everything we’ve talked about here, that it’s our level of belief, if you want to use the word belief, or faith, in what we’re trying to accomplish, as well as faith in the universe or God, that allows us to manifest the desires. Joe: As we speak, I’m ordering the book – and that’s what I mean about taking action. I don’t know where this book is going to lead me, but because it came up in this conversation, I’m buying it, and that’s the answer to your original question. You don’t know. I don’t know but I’m taking the action. When the book arrives, I’ll read it and see what’s next in that moment. Michelle: That’s a great example of inspired action. The author also says that our goals or intentions should be a means, not an end. How often do we reach a goal and then suddenly stop? He says, “No matter how many goals we may achieve during a lifetime, you must look ahead to a new goal, otherwise you will experience a letdown every time you achieve a major goal. The achievement of goals should be an ongoing process – not the culmination of an effort that does not lead to a sustained effort to achieve additional goals.” Joe: I’ve discovered I always have an inspired goal, kind of dangling before me, so that, as I’m finishing the one at hand, I have an eye down the road. It’s like www.miraclescoaching.com 139 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. saying, “Okay, I’m making a stop here as I’m driving down the road of life because I’m accomplishing something.” At the same time, I’m thinking, “This is where I’m going next.” I may not know how to get to it, but it keeps me energized. As a result, I feel curious, and I have a spring in my step. I’m taking action, continuing in the flow of life – and there’s an exhilaration that comes from having that. Michelle: The thought that comes to mind is we need to emulate the grand creation we live in. Even though there’s chaos in the world and in our lives which brings uneasiness, that chaos actually allows opportunity for creativity and growth. If you are experiencing challenges in your life, or your life is in a state of flux, you can use that chaos to channel creativity and move forward. No matter where we find chaos in the world, or uneasiness – a lack of the “hows” – we can turn our thinking towards the grand creation, allowing that chaos to be able to redirect it. We can turn it into something good. We can find a solution to the “hows” by living on faith, letting go of the urgency, learning from our mistakes, and learning from our failures. This is what it means to emulate the grand creation, and it’s a beautiful way to direct our lives. Joe: Yes, you have to trust the process. Set your goals, and work on those that are coming from inspiration. Ask yourself, “How many other people does this goal help besides me?” By doing this, www.miraclescoaching.com 140 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. your goal will produce a more benevolent outcome. Then, take action – in spite of not seeing the entire picture much of the time. You just have to trust that all the actions you’re taking will lead to new actions, decisions, and opportunities. Seize them, and, before you know it, you will arrive at your goal. The key principles are trust, action, keeping love in front of all of it, and coming from love throughout it. Michelle: That’s like what your book, Zero Limits, talks about. One of my elderly students has been a holistic practitioner for years, but her practice wasn’t going the way she wanted it to. I had her work with visualization and she said, “It just wasn’t coming to me. I was having a difficult time doing the visualization.” Then, a thought came to her, “There’s an easier way, and that easier way is Ho'oponopono, co-creating.” When she shared that with me I thought, “You’re right, that is the easiest way.” Of all the hundreds and hundreds of clearing techniques there are, the most powerful one is Ho'oponopono, because it’s co-creating what we want – love. It’s co-creating with the universe. Joe: Let’s leave that as the thought today, “There’s got to be an easier way.” In fact, there is always an easier way. There is always a way, and there’s always an easier way, are great things to keep in mind. Michelle: www.miraclescoaching.com 141 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Thank you for donating your time, Joe, and for sharing your wisdom. Joe: Thank you, Michelle. God speed to everybody. www.miraclescoaching.com 142 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Secret Session #8 Joe Vitale with Adam Mortimer Adam: Welcome, Joe. Joe: Thank you, Adam. I’m glad to be here today. Adam: I’d like to get started with something that’s on everybody’s mind these days – money. Recently, one of my students asked, “How do I overcome the block that I cannot receive money?” Can you talk about common blocks people have relating to this? Joe: It’s interesting, because when we use the word block, we actually set up a block. The only thing that’s preventing us from receiving the things we want are beliefs, so when we call it a block, we make it seem more difficult than it is. The word block just means a belief – and a belief is simply a thought. Beliefs are thoughts you bought into and kept repeating, until that belief seemed like it was reality. In my book, Attract Money Now, I talk about the most common ones. www.miraclescoaching.com 143 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. For example, many people believe money is the root of all evil – and, of course, it’s not. In fact, as George Bernard Shaw said, “It’s the lack of money that is the root of all evil.” I’ve always liked that perspective. Whoever asked the question needs to work with their Miracles Coach and explore what they believe about money, because something in them is keeping it from coming into their life in greater amounts, or as much as they’d like. It’s important to realize that you do have money. Money is coming into your life, you’re already receiving. You already allow money to come in at a certain level. Yes, you want to widen and upgrade it so you can allow more money to come in, but the first thing is to realize you already have money coming in – you’re not blocking money. If you’re in Miracles Coaching™, paying for rent, food, and utilities, you are receiving money. The question might become, “I’m frustrated, why am I not receiving more money?” If so, that’s what you want to explore with your Miracles Coach – why you feel frustrated. This will unveil the particular belief you have around that. Not everyone will have the same belief that’s stopping more money from coming in, but there are some fairly common ones. For example, “There’s never enough to go around.” People believe in scarcity, but it’s not a fact, it’s a belief. When you question your beliefs, you loosen their hold, and then you can receive even more. It all begins with gratitude for this moment, for what’s going on in this moment. When you say, “I want more money,” and forget you’re actually attracting money right now, you need to pause and say, “I’m really grateful for www.miraclescoaching.com 144 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. what I’m attracting now, and I thank God, and myself, for allowing this much money in.” As you begin to realize that you are receiving money, and the more you can move into that state of gratitude for it, the more you can allow money to come in at even greater levels. Adam: If you believe you have a block there, you probably do. I know I had to clear my own belief around that and my inability to receive. Once I did, good things started happening. To help them understand, I sometimes ask my students, “When someone pays you a compliment, can you receive it?” I can’t tell you how many people are blocked in something as simple as that, and a compliment does carry over to money. There’s no real difference. Joe: A therapist said to me a long time ago, “How good can you stand it?” Most of us have an unconscious barometer that keeps us from being a little too happy or a little too wealthy. Some of it has to do with a sense of deserving. For example, “I don’t deserve to have millions of dollars,” could be somebody’s belief, but they feel okay with having a few thousand dollars or a few hundred dollars. What’s the difference? Nothing – only their comfort level with wealth, or their sense of deserving it. This kind of material is often best explored with a Miracles Coach – that’s what they’re there for. They’re your ally and support, an objective partner to help shine a light on what you may be seeing. www.miraclescoaching.com 145 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. So the good news is this isn’t a big deal. These aren’t irremovable blocks – they’re ghostly beliefs that will go with the wind once you take a look at them. Stop worrying about it and just focus on the fact that you are already receiving money. There is no block. You are only expanding the stream. Adam: So you’re reminding everyone that the idea is to recognize and be grateful for the wealth you already have in this moment. Joe: Yes, and I keep coming back to this because everything you’re looking for is in this moment, yet we keep pushing this moment aside and being critical of it. We’re always grading this moment and saying, “Yeah, yeah, yeah, that’s cool, but this isn’t what I want, I want something else.” But that’s not how the world works. When you can be in this moment with incredible gratitude, then that gratitude expands to make the next moments coming into your life even more enriched. So don’t look to the future and say, “I’m going to be happy when I have more money,” or, “I’m going to be happy when I have all this other stuff.” You want to be happy now, and you do that by feeling gratitude for what you have now. As you move forward, you’ll be enriching yourself, pulling in more and more of the things you long for – but dismissing this moment doesn’t help you attract what you want. Adam: www.miraclescoaching.com 146 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Would you say this is a part of the Law of Attraction? And are there other ways to make the Law of Attraction effortless and natural? Joe: Yes, definitely, and the first thought that comes to mind is, “Quit worrying about it.” The very desire to wrestle with it, or to think that it’s not already natural, is what makes it feel unnatural. It’s similar to the idea that there are no blocks. The more we can realize that the Law of Attraction is already operating, that you’re already in it, using and living it, the more you realize, “Oh, it’s already in my nature. It’s already here.” You want to learn to fine tune the process: Get clearer about what you want; focus on where you want to go rather than where you’ve been; and, focus on what you would desire to have rather than on what you’ve been complaining about having or not having. The more you get into a flow that says, “I’m grateful for everything I’ve already attracted, and I have faith that I’m going to attract even more as I go forward,” the more you stop wrestling with life. The flow is already here, so it’s just a matter of stepping into it, so to speak. This is the irony of it. You’re already in the flow and you don’t know it – because you’re fighting with it. You’re thinking, “The Law of Attraction would work better for me if I had a more natural approach to it.” It’s already working for you! It’s already effortless, it’s already natural, if you’ll just relax into it. How do you merge with the flow that’s going on in life? First, you stop arguing with it. You find reasons to be grateful for it as it is, and as you’re grateful www.miraclescoaching.com 147 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. it will expand. Second, as you have faith, that faith gives you the energy to move forward to do new things. The key words here are gratitude and faith. It may sound like I’m oversimplifying it – but this is the million dollar secret. Relax into this moment, which you attracted, you’re already in this wonderful moment that you attracted. As you relax into it, you put yourself into a place where you can receive inspired ideas and take inspired action, which leads to more greatly enriched future moments. Remember, you’ve already got the Law of Attraction working – and, best of all, it’s working on your side. Adam: It’s interesting how things work out very naturally and effortlessly when you learn to let go and get into the flow, although this can be challenging sometimes. What are some good tools to overcome the fear of doing something new? Joe: The one I like to suggest first is doing a mental rehearsal. Visualize yourself taking the action on whatever it is that you’re attempting to do because the more you can rehearse it in your mind, the more comfortable you’ll get. When you’re about to do something new, usually you’re outside your comfort zone, so you may have a little bit of insecurity and discomfort. The more you mentally rehearse it – see yourself doing whatever that new thing is to the best of your ability –the physical action becomes that much easier. Another way to look at this is to imagine it not working out, where the actions you take don’t work out the way you want, then ask yourself, “Am I still www.miraclescoaching.com 148 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. okay, am I still alive, do I still love and appreciate myself, can I still take actions on the next idea, or the next steps?” And, of course, the answers are “Yes.” Imagining a worst case scenario and realizing you’d still be okay after it, takes the fear out of it so you can move forward and take action. You don’t have to do the giant things first. The more you take baby steps in the direction of doing something new, the more you build that muscle of self-confidence. As you do, you gain more and more internal strength for when you’re ready to do something bigger. Adam: If you ask someone, “How do you know you can tie your shoe?” they’ll say, “Because I’ve done it a thousand times.” It’s the same thing you’re talking about. Visualization works because the subconscious doesn’t know the difference between fact and fiction. So if you visualize something over and over, your subconscious eventually accepts it as real, as really happening. And it’s a great way to build confidence easily and naturally, without trying to build it. You simply do it in the mind first, and the mind accepts it as if it’s already done physically. Could you use this, or other sales tools, to increase your income or sales? Joe: Just about anything you would use for any other goal would be applicable to that, as well, but having very concrete money goals is a good idea. For example, if you’re already making a certain amount of money, you might say you want to increase it by 15% in 30 days. It’s okay if you don’t know www.miraclescoaching.com 149 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. how to do it, as long as it’s believable to you. It could be 50%, if you believe that’s possible, or at least probable. The next step is to write out, “This is my intention. I’m going to increase my sales by 15%.” Then state it aloud. I also believe in having visual reminders, so I suggest putting it on the mirrors in your house or bathroom to see it every day, like mini vision boards. Sometimes I’ll use an index card or other visual representation of the end result of what I want. When I look in the mirror I’m going to see myself and that card or imagery. It’s a perfect time to do some self-programming, too – a pep talk or affirmation. This sends a signal into my unconscious mind, “Here’s what I want, here’s where I want to go.” I’d also break it down further and say something like, “I’m going to make 20 phone calls in the morning.” Say whatever is believable that you intend to do. These types of smaller goals are benchmarks that continually build inner strength because, if you say you’re going to make five calls in an hour and you make those five calls, you feel good about yourself. Then, when you say you’re going to increase it and make 20 calls a day and follow through on that, you’re building even more momentum within yourself. Keep in mind you still want to maintain the proper mindset of feeling gratitude. Feeling grateful for the sales you already have is going to help you increase the attraction level for even more sales. So as you go through the day making calls, some people buying and others not, you’re still grateful for all of them. Coming from a sense of service matters, too, because love is at the heart of service. When you make your calls in person, by phone, or e-mail, you want to www.miraclescoaching.com 150 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. express, “I love my job, I love this product and service, and I love the people I talk to, whether they buy or not.” The more you can come from that spirit of love, the more they’re going to feel it – and you just never know. If someone doesn’t buy from you right now, they may call back to buy it another time, or they may tell someone who could end up being your biggest sale of the month or year. I truly believe in having this heartfelt approach and it’s at the core of my own selling – love everybody you’re talking to. So first get your heart right, and then add on visualization, seeing things working out the way you want. Have concrete goals, whether it’s for the day, week, month, or year, and put little reminders on the mirror. All of this keeps your energy up and you moving forward. So if I had to reduce it to just one thing, it would be to love whatever product or service that you’re offering. If you don’t, why are you selling it? And love the people you talk to because you’re serving them, and they’ll feel it if you come from love. Adam: I’d also add to clear any negativity you have around the product. Make sure you’re in alignment with it, and that your desire and life calling lines up with the product. That’s vital for love to come through. Our CEO expresses it this way, “Your net hope is your belief minus your doubts.” Joe: That’s worth writing down. www.miraclescoaching.com 151 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Adam: Just as we increase our net worth by paying down any liabilities, getting rid of doubts increases your net hope and makes it stronger. You’ll get those sales and definitely be using the Law of Attraction. What about the importance of self-image? Is there a way to improve the way a person views themselves? Joe: Yes, and it’s the same answer I gave in an interview recently on attracting a soulmate – it’s all about loving yourself first. How well do you love yourself? This is a key to building up your self-image, so you feel better and feel stronger about yourself. Look in the mirror – it’s one of the best things you can do. It’s the mirror again, but this time you focus on finding all the things you like about yourself. It can be anything about you. For example, you can say, “I really love your eyes. I love the color of your eyes. I like the setting of your eyes. I like your eyebrows. I really, really love your eyes.” As I confessed in that interview, in the early days I was trying to build my self-esteem, while coming out of homelessness and poverty. I felt worthless about myself and like a victim. I didn’t have any self-confidence. I had no self-image outside of someone who was poor and unhappy. That’s when I learned about this technique. I’d stand in front of the mirror and say, “Okay, what is there that I can begin to appreciate?” www.miraclescoaching.com 152 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. At first I didn’t like what I saw. I wasn’t happy with myself. I didn’t feel proud. I’d think, “Come on, there’s something here. Keep looking.” It occurred to me that, throughout my life, I’d always been complimented on the dimples in my cheeks, so I said, “Well, everybody seems to love my dimples, so let’s start there.” It’s funny now, but I had to start somewhere. So I acknowledged I have great dimples that seemed to warm people and cause them to smile and notice me. It was something I could see, “Okay, this seems to be working.” This is where you start. You look in the mirror, and in your life, and you find something you’re proud of, content with, or happy with, and start with that – even if they’re moments in childhood. We all have them. Maybe you got an “A” on a paper. You won a spelling bee contest. Somebody complimented you on your handwriting, or an art piece. Whatever it happens to be, focus on that as the beginning point to rebuild and re-boost your self-image. It’s similar to the gratitude technique where you start with something small in the moment and expand your appreciation from that thing to everything around you. You then realize it was always there, but you didn’t see it because of your limited perception that was feeling down. So look for something in your life, something in the mirror, to begin focusing on and say, “Okay, this is what I’m grateful for, this is what I’m good at, this is what I feel strong about.” That’s how you build your self-image. This isn’t hard and it doesn’t have to take a long time. Adam: www.miraclescoaching.com 153 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Another technique is writing a script of what you’d like to become and who you’d like to be, then visualizing yourself as if you’re already that person. When you first do it, it may seem a little odd because it’s different and doesn’t fit yet. It’s just like a pair of new shoes that you have to break in – after a few weeks of wearing them, they feel comfortable. Your new self-image will get comfortable, too, as your belief grows. It usually takes about a 21-day period of visualizing it – really seeing it and believing that’s who you are. As you’ve suggested, the use of mirrors is powerful, and it’s the perfect segue to bring up the subject of “mirroring” someone else. Can you explain more about this as a technique, and whether or not it works in gaining rapport with someone? Joe: Mirroring is a Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) technique of matching another person’s breathing pattern, rate of speech, and body movements in an attempt to create an unconscious rapport with them. It definitely works, although at first it can feel very awkward. The missing secret that often goes unnoticed is that when you’re talking to somebody about something you’re both excited about, you naturally do this. You’ll automatically lean towards each other, gesture with your hands, and probably talk at the same rate of speed. These are all things that would be called mirroring. As a technique, mirroring or matching somebody is done consciously when you want to create rapport with people. If people are interested in knowing more, I would recommend reading some of the NLP books available. In fact, I’m reading one now worth mentioning called The User’s Guide to Slight of Mouth: How to www.miraclescoaching.com 154 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Unleash the Magic of Language to Persuade Anyone, Anytime, Anywhere by Doug O’Brien. Adam: Mirroring is definitely a powerful tool with practice – you wouldn’t want to copy someone to the point that it’s obvious. It’s got to be somewhat covert if you want it to work properly and not appear clunky. Joe: Yes, that would negate the whole idea. Adam: Beyond creating rapport, what if someone wants to attract the relationship of their dreams? Is there a way to let go of needing it – especially when you feel like you do? Joe: I’ve been there. I know what it’s like to want to attract your soulmate, and to experience that desperate feeling of need. The first thing to do is look at what’s causing it – what’s the belief behind it? Most of the time, it’s a belief that says, “I’m never going to find anybody.” And, under that is a belief that says, “All the good people are taken.” But how can that be? With seven billion people on the planet, surely all the good ones haven’t been taken. www.miraclescoaching.com 155 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Another belief is the idea that your time period is short, that you have to do it now or it’ll never happen, or that you’re going to be alone. People have thoughts like, “I’m alone at night and I’ll be alone in the future. What if I die alone? What if I never have a family or kids?” That’s just your mind racing in negative beliefs and limitations. They’re not reality. And here’s the secret to all that: The more you can be content with yourself, by yourself, the more you’ll become desirable to other people. Nobody likes needy or desperate people. We want to be around happy, content, secure people. So the more you can be secure and content with yourself, being able to say, “I’m home alone tonight, but you know what? I’m going to watch whatever I want on TV. Maybe I’ll write the great American novel or compose a song.” Regardless of what you choose to do, the more you’re happy about doing it while feeling content with yourself, the more you up the odds that your phone is going to ring. The key is to love, appreciate, and enjoy yourself first, and when you do that, other people pick up the scent and come looking for you. Adam: You’re saying to let it go and let the universe bring it to you. What if someone finds it hard to accept the idea that everything is a projection of their mind? Will it hurt their ability to attract things? Joe: www.miraclescoaching.com 156 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. No, because you’re attracting things right now – it’s already working. The thing you’ll miss, however, is the sense of power that comes from having and accepting full responsibility. When people first hear about this, they often think, “Oh, my God, I’m not responsible for the entire world and everything that’s going on,” but that’s not the kind of responsibility I’m talking about. What I’m referring to is taking responsibility for your experience of the world and everything going on around you. When you look out and see something you don’t like, it’s a reflection of your belief system. The more you realize that everything going on around you is your interpretation of reality, and own it, along with understanding and working with your own beliefs, the better you can create the reality you want – the way you want it. If you want to think that the world is not a projection of yourself and disown any sort of relationship to it, that’s fine, but it puts you in the position of playing victim where you have no sense of control. And, it will make you feel separated from the world – because you think the world’s “out there” and you’re “over here.” When you move in the direction of thinking, “The world is a projection of what’s inside of me, a mirror reflection,” then you can use it as a wake-up call. You’re going in the direction of empowerment and conscious responsibility, which has awareness attached to it, rather than guilt or blame. This acceptance of full responsibility encourages you to become aware of your beliefs. When you take responsibility for everything you see, in essence you’re simply revealing your own beliefs. That’s powerful. And, as a result, you’ll be able to attract more of what you prefer, and probably faster. www.miraclescoaching.com 157 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Adam: Could you suggest specific ways to clear beliefs if you’re a kinesthetic learner? Joe: Kinesthetic people generally act on how things feel to them, and, although any of the techniques I talk about would work, EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique), might be highly effective. There’s a lot of information available online about it, including the documentary movie I’m featured in called The Tapping Solution. EFT is like psychological acupuncture, but is done physically. You tap with one hand on different parts of your body – your other hand, chest, forehead, face – while saying certain clearing statements. Having said this, I don’t want people to think they only have one learning style. We have all of them, so anyone who’s kinesthetic is also visual and auditory. We might prefer one over the other, but any of the clearing techniques are going to work. Adam: When I first heard about EFT, I had my doubts about it, but it works as a powerful clearing method. What about vision boards? They involve both visual and kinesthetic because you’re physically putting it together like art. Do you have any best practices for doing this relating to size or color? Should you have more than one? www.miraclescoaching.com 158 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Joe: It’s a personal issue. You should have whatever vision board turns you on. Years ago, after the movie, “The Secret,” came out, Oprah did a show with Lisa Nichols about making vision boards. Lisa was bold enough to bring her own on TV for everyone to see, which was somewhat embarrassing for her. She had a big white poster board with clip art, photos and statements representing what she wanted pasted on this vision board. For example, she had a photo of the man of her dreams she wanted to attract, and a photo of the slenderized person she wanted to be. There’s no right way to make a vision board, although they’re often done on white poster board. You can clip pictures of things you’d like to attract from magazines or books, or even draw them – images like the car of your dreams, a romantic relationship, or a money sign. Recently I was at Nexersys, a company that’s created a fun, interactive martial arts sparring machine that I wanted for my gym. While I was there, I noticed that every office had a vision board. When I commented on it, they said, “Oh, we don’t usually show those to people.” Each person had been encouraged to put up a poster board that included the sales quota they wanted to hit, with photos of celebrities and other people they wanted to sell their product to. The whole point is to make it fun and colorful. It should feel emotional and energetic, in whatever way, shape, or form is easiest for you, so that it gets into your subconscious mind. Put it some place in your home where you’ll see it often – by your desk and computer, in the bedroom, or bathroom. When I was in my teenage years I thought I was going to be the heavyweight boxing champion of the world, which, 50 years later, sounds funny because I don’t www.miraclescoaching.com 159 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. even know who the heavyweight boxing champion is anymore. I cut out photos of the boxers I admired and taped them on my bedroom wall. At night, I’d begin dozing off while looking at Floyd Patterson or Muhammad Ali, imagining I was one of the heavyweight boxing champions of the world, beating these guys. Before I fell asleep, I’d raise my hand in the air like I had been pronounced the winner. During this time, I got in the best shape and had some of the proudest athletic moments of my life. Vision boards are fun, powerful – and anything goes. Just make it thrilling for you personally. The images are powerful because that’s the language of your unconscious mind, like a software code. It talks in images, Adam: A vision board doesn’t necessarily need to be pictures on a board. It could also be actual physical objects. For example, one of my students who worked at a movie theater used different things there to symbolize what she wanted to attract – the movie screen, projector, even the podium where she took tickets. Each had a meaning to her, so it became a 3-D vision board of her goals. Joe: You could also take a photo of your board and make it the screen saver on your iPhone or Blackberry. Adam: Maybe that’s a good app idea. www.miraclescoaching.com 160 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. That’s about all the time we have for today – is there anything else you’d like to add? Joe: This would be a great time to share with everyone what I’ve been up to. First, my new book, Faith, will be out in October, and The Remembering Process, which I co-authored, will be out in February. Then, for the last four days, I’ve been in the recording studio with some of the greatest rock and roll musicians of all time, recording new songs for my fourth album. Some of these songs are so powerful and mesmerizing, I believe people can be transformed just by listening to them, raising them to new heights of ecstasy. I’ve only been doing this for two years, yet here I am coming out of the gate with three Grammy winners on this fourth CD. Adam: Aligning to Zero puts me in a trance, such a blissful state of happiness and joy. If this next CD is anything like that, we’re in for a real treat. Joe: They seem to get better and better, so I’m very excited and wanted to share the news. More importantly, all I’m doing is following my inspiration, and when my inspiration whispered, “You always wanted to be a musician, why don’t you go do it now?” I took action. www.miraclescoaching.com 161 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Often when I take action, I’m nervous, reluctant, and insecure, like everyone else. I didn’t have singing or songwriting experience. I knew three chords on the guitar and no music theory. I’d never worked with professional musicians. I’m learning new things, stretching myself, and daring something worthy – but the bottom line is I’m following my inspiration. Your miracle is right now – and from right now you can follow the inspiration for the next ones. This is what it’s all about – the magic and miracle you seek is right now. Adam: Joe, thank you so much. It’s been a real blessing to hear from you today. God bless. Joe: Adam, I can’t thank you enough, and love you all. God speed to everybody. www.miraclescoaching.com 162 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Secret Session #9 Joe Vitale with Janeen Detrick Janeen: Welcome, Joe! Joe: Thank you, I’m grateful to be here. Janeen: I’ve been hearing a lot lately from students who have entered a relationship – romantic and business – where their finances are intertwined. So not only are their lives intertwined through whatever endeavors they have undertaken, but their finances are now intertwined. What do you do when that significant other, or business partner, has beliefs and energy that is not positive or high vibrational in nature and, in fact, is negative? Can you discuss how a partner’s limiting beliefs affect us? Joe: That’s an in-depth question, in the sense that it can help reveal the dynamics of what’s going on in life. Basically, the other person in your relationship is a mirror to what is in you. You’ve attracted them into your life unconsciously. There’s no right or wrong, no guilt or blame here. In fact, you can celebrate the fact that you are such a powerful attractor you’ve attracted this other person. When you look at them and see that www.miraclescoaching.com 163 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. they seem to have limiting beliefs, those limiting beliefs aren’t in them. They’re in you. This is very powerful to grasp, and we need to so that we can experience an awakening in life. The vast majority of people blame others. They say, “I see you have negativity, and limiting beliefs about money. That’s affecting me.” No, it’s not affecting you unless you come from a victim mentality. But to be a victor and own your own power, you have to release all blame, all shirking of responsibility. So the good news is, first, that you’re a powerful attractor. You attracted this other person into your life – for business or romance. Second, you can be thankful that they’re demonstrating to you, out loud and in living color, your own beliefs. Of course, you might be thinking, “Oh, I don’t have those beliefs. I believe in prosperity. I believe in positivity.” Maybe consciously you do, but unconsciously you may not, and this is where the real work has to be done. This is why I created Miracles Coaching™, to make it easier for people to sort out these things between their conscious and unconscious minds. Until they actually deal with what’s in their unconscious mind, they may not fully attract and keep what they really want. So whoever you’re in a relationship with, you attracted them. That’s great – you’re powerful. The other person is a mirror of what’s going on in you, and that’s great, too, because they’re making your work even easier. Instead of you trying to explore, “Oh, what do I believe about money?” all you have to do is look at the other person and listen to what they believe about money, business, romance, or relationships. They’re vocalizing what you believe at an unconscious level – otherwise you would not have attracted them into your life. They’re a match to www.miraclescoaching.com 164 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. what’s going on in your being, what’s going on in the way that you walk through life. This is empowerment, taking your power. Not blaming, not being a victim, but realizing, “Wow, I’m incredibly powerful to attract this partner to reveal my own programming.” There’s no power in being a victim, no joy, and certainly no freedom. It’s a dead-end street. In fact, I had breakfast with Lou Ferrigno, the famous actor who played the Hulk, and he talked about power and negativity. I said, “In my experience when people start feeling negative, thinking negative, talking negative, or acting negative, they lose all power completely. They pull the plug on their very existence because they become a victim. Lou looked at me and said, “I have never heard anybody put it that way, but that is absolutely right. When you start to go into being a victim, and thinking and acting negative, you lose your power.” Janeen: Do you think people are afraid of someone else’s negative belief because they want to believe in the positive things, and, unconsciously, are afraid of being what they see in their partner? Could this be why they attracted a partner who could mirror it for them? Joe: Absolutely, we tend to attract what we love and what we fear because they’re two incredibly powerful emotions. Any thoughts that have that much www.miraclescoaching.com 165 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. feeling to them get propelled into the universe and we start attracting based on that. So when you really love something – you attract that thing to you. For example, I’m loving creating music, singing, my guitars, musicians I’m playing with – and I’m attracting more music into my life. In fact, I was just voted the # 9 singer/songwriter in Austin, Texas, which blew my mind because I wasn’t even trying for it, but here I am. Things like this fall in my lap because I’m loving music. The same thing happens when you fear something, because fear has incredible energy, a deep fire that will attract something to match it. It’s so important to dissolve your fears, get clear about what you love, and focus on that. You want to come from love virtually all the time, as much as you can humanly, or divinely, do. Janeen: I often hear from students that when they want to attract the love of their life, they write these big, long lists of what they want. I can’t help but think, “My goodness, who but God would qualify?” The details are so specific and minute that it almost gets to the point where you wonder if anybody fits these criteria. Given they’re being so nitpicky, could it be that, underneath, they’re afraid they’re that way themselves? So they write the opposite traits on their lists? Joe: That’s interesting, because what’s really important when it comes to attracting somebody else is self-love. www.miraclescoaching.com 166 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Loving yourself is the number one thing, yet a lot of people come from desperation. They think, “I have to have somebody. I’m getting older and past my prime. I don’t want to be alone. I have to have a certain person. And I have to have them very quickly.” These are just some of the beliefs people have. They make a long list because of their desperation. I usually suggest that people counteract this by making a list of all their own positive traits. For example: o What are reasons for you to love you? o What is positive about you? o What do you consider to be your strengths? o What are your strong points? You want to be at a point where you are totally okay being alone. This is powerful. When you can truly love yourself, appreciate and feel grateful for yourself, and be by yourself – that’s what makes you desirable. Most people looking for another partner are wounded in some way. They haven’t made themselves whole yet, so they end up attracting the unconscious counterpart of the very thing they don’t like in themselves. This is why I suggest finding what you love in yourself first. A powerful technique is looking yourself in the eye, in the mirror, and giving yourself a pep talk. Go over your features and find what you like. Begin with whatever’s obvious for you and say, “I really love my eyes,” or “I really love the color of my eyes,” or “I really love my skin.” Look at your life in the same way, and think about all those cherished moments when you were at your best and in the flow, moments you felt proud and www.miraclescoaching.com 167 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. really loved yourself. This is one way of moving towards being grateful for you. When you’re grateful for you, and you love and appreciate you, you make yourself whole. From that place, you won’t even have to make a list of what you’re looking for because you will be embodying the traits of love, care, wisdom, and warmth that people find attractive. People will just flow into your life until you find the person that you believe is “the one.” So rather than making a list of what you want in other people, have a list of what’s good about you, so that you as the individual feel whole and complete by yourself. Janeen: If you’re whole and complete by yourself, you’ll also attract a person who is whole and complete. Joe: That’s right, and the other person will feel it. Instead of two desperate people, it will be two whole people who want to share, which is much more exquisite. It’s the Divine embrace at that point – souls coming together participating in their own awakening, two people who can be on the same level. But when victims get together, they won’t have the most pleasant time, and the relationship, in all likelihood, won’t last. I’m not saying that it can’t be resolved because healing and awakening always happen. But using our analogy here, if wounded people get together, they’re probably going to maintain their wound, and not heal from it until they heal themselves. www.miraclescoaching.com 168 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Janeen: It’s significant that you said, “Be okay with being alone,” not, “Focus on being alone.” Your energy isn’t going to create aloneness. Joe: That’s a valuable distinction because, you’re right, we’re not attracting aloneness, or saying that’s the goal or the focus at all. Being alone simply means being comfortable with yourself. When it’s Saturday night, for example, and you’re sitting at home eating a TV dinner and watching a movie, you’re enjoying it because you’re okay with you. You’re totally at peace being by yourself. Soon enough, you know you’ll be with somebody – because you’re okay with you. Janeen: In your Awakening Course, you offer an interesting perspective about the ego actually being of service to us, assisting in moving our life forward. Can you talk more about that? Joe: I’d be glad to because I wrestled with the ego for the longest time. When I was homeless and in poverty, I was also studying and going to the library (sometimes living at the library to get my shelter), really absorbing all these different ideas – spiritual teachings, philosophies, metaphysics, psychologies, slants, theories and theologies – trying to understand it all. A lot of them put down www.miraclescoaching.com 169 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. the ego, and I’d wrestle with my own, thinking, “Okay, how do you kill off the ego and live without it?” Yet, what was I doing? I was coming from ego – while trying to destroy or control ego. As humans, most of us go through those periods. It’s a disturbing place to be, especially when you’re struggling physically and financially to survive, like I was, and also dealing with the mindset of, “Okay, what’s true about spirituality?” Trying to kill off your ego is a little bit like playing chess with yourself. It’s your ego trying to kill the ego, and it knows what you’re up to. It knows every single maneuver you would try to pull to kill it – and it’s not going to happen. Ultimately what I realized is that the ego needs to be in service of Divinity. The unconscious mind is our power center and our conscious mind is basically where the ego is. The problem is when you let ego try to steer the ship. It’s like the tip of an iceberg. You can barely see out the window to see water on the horizon, let alone see the whole ocean, or planet. The ego cannot see the totality of the universe. The Divine can. But when the ego says, “I’m looking out the window and see where I want to go, so I’m going to steer the boat – I’m going to steer your life in this direction,” that’s problematic. In reality, you’re only looking through a peephole, so you can’t possibly know how to steer that boat, or your life. The unconscious mind is more connected to Divinity, and that’s what you want to direct your life, and to surrender to. Two years ago, I got a whisper in my ear to start playing music, which I felt was coming from the Divine. At first, my ego said, “I can’t do that. I’m not a musician. I love guitars. I have guitars, but I don’t know how to play them. I can’t www.miraclescoaching.com 170 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. sing. I can’t write songs. I can’t perform. I can’t make an album.” My ego was on its hind legs, fighting, but the Divine said, “No, it’s time for you to be a musician and to actually express Divinity and some of your messages through music.” Once I remembered that my ego is supposed to serve the Divine, it became a matter of, “Okay, I don’t know how I’m going to do this, but, yes, show me the way.” I’m led to a music producer who wants to have lunch with me, although I don’t know that he’s a music producer, and he doesn’t know I want to create an album when we set it up. We were just reconnecting after a six-year absence. This is how the Divine orchestrates everything when you let ego serve the Divine. So when people talk about transcending the ego, they’re not saying, “Kill the ego. Murder the ego. Squelch the ego. Erase the ego.” They’re saying, “Come from a higher perspective.” In other words, transcend it. Transcending the ego means you come from the Divine, that higher place in you. When you do, the Divine can ask the ego to create music, open your own restaurant, or write a cookbook – whatever it happens to be for each individual. It’s different for everyone, but the Divine will inspire you, and this leads to inspired action. If I had only listened to my ego, I wouldn’t be where I am now. I wouldn’t have these books or audios. I wouldn’t have the music or be traveling. I wouldn’t be interviewed on TV. None of these things would be going on. So listen to Divinity and let ego serve it. That’s how you transcend the ego – by letting Divinity lead the way. Janeen: www.miraclescoaching.com 171 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Some traditions suggest that if we kill the ego all together, we’ll dissolve into nothingness, like we’re not here anymore Joe: You need the ego to navigate traffic, drive your car, balance your checkbook, get through the day, and not walk into walls – but the Divine gives you the moment-by-moment inspiration to bring all those wonderful miracles you’ve been longing for, and to help you stay on track for your calling. When you follow your life path, your God-driven, God-given gift of life here, then life tends to work. I know that in my own life, when I was fighting inspiration, the nudging coming from the Divine, my life sucked. It was hard. That’s when it was difficult and I stayed in poverty. When I started to surrender the control of my ego, I said, “Okay, Divine. I’m not making out very well all by myself. Help me out. Show me the way and I will do it.” That’s when I found the escalator through life, and I’ve been riding it ever since. Janeen: And bringing a lot of us with you. Can you share more about ways we can quiet the ego so we can receive and perceive Divine inspirations? Joe: My favorite method is Ho’oponopono, which I wrote about in Zero Limits. I love cleaning and clearing, and do it all the time. It’s the simplest, easiest thing for www.miraclescoaching.com 172 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. any of us to do. How hard is it to think, “I love you, I’m sorry, please forgive me, thank you” and just keep it going? It’s designed to erase programs, and by programs, I mean your beliefs, the software in your mind, so to speak. This is the magic formula, the combination lock, or “Open sesame” that gets in there and starts scrubbing the unconscious mind of limiting beliefs. It works even if you don’t know they’re there because it’s working at the unconscious level. You don’t have to be able to articulate the beliefs for them to be worked out with Ho’oponopono. Clearing the unconscious of limiting beliefs affects the conscious mind – because thoughts in your conscious mind bubble up from the unconscious. Imagine a big bathtub with suds floating on the surface. Those suds came from within the water below, but first someone had to put soap in, add hot water, and stir it. Like this, the unconscious mind has all these elements creating and bubbling up. Your thoughts, your ego, are the suds. Ho’oponopono is a cleansing and rewiring process that removes limiting and negative programs you’ve gathered as you grew up in the world – even the ones that Dr. Hew Len says came from our ancestors and are part of our DNA. All of that is in our system, although we’re not aware of it consciously. If somebody pulled a DNA sample from you and diagnosed it, they’d probably say, “Oh, yes, here are elements from your great-great grandmother.” It’s in our lineage. So when you do Ho’oponopono, that’s what you’re cleaning and clearing. The great goal is to be so clear that when Divinity speaks through you, you don’t think, hesitate, or second guess about a call to take action. You just do it because there’s no interference from the conscious mind thinking, “Oh, should I do it? Am www.miraclescoaching.com 173 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. I the one? Do I have the money? Do I have the experience? Do I have the time? What do my neighbors think? What do my parents think?” Those thoughts are simply the suds bubbling up from that bathtub of consciousness, programmed in the unconscious mind. Ho’oponopono deprograms all of that. Dr. Hew Len said if you knew how much cleaning is done when you do Ho’oponopono, you would never stop. That’s how powerful it is. Janeen: I know you have many testimonials about how well Ho’oponopono has worked. Does Ho’oponopono give the person the new perspectives, epiphanies, or “aha” moments that set them free? Or, is it just neutralizing and clearing the old junk, paving the way so that we can receive edicts? Joe: It’s the latter. Ho’oponopono is clearing and wiping away the suds. It’s cleaning the windows, pulling down all the spider webs in the mind. It cleans and clears whatever is blocking us from hearing the voice of God, Divinity, life, or nature, whatever phrase is most comfortable to use. It’s not giving us a statement or belief. If anything, it’s the opposite. It’s taking away the beliefs so we can hear reality. We can hear truth, the rawness of life, where the magic and miracles are. That’s why I think it's so wonderful. www.miraclescoaching.com 174 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. It’s a simple, easy technique that I’m doing even as we’re talking, “I love you. I’m sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you.” I’m cleaning the windows in my mind so I can see the miracles everywhere around me right now. Janeen: It’s quieting the mind chatter and erasing it, so that we get to zero point then. I feel that’s what we’re doing in Miracles Coaching™, too. We help people gain a perspective that can open them up to an epiphany. Joe: Absolutely, we need Miracles Coaching™ because we need an ally, somebody objective who’s in our corner. We need a partner, somebody to reflect back our beliefs and question them, and encourage us to question them. We need to be reminded to keep doing the very techniques we know to do. We all need this. I believe that coaching is essential, and I have my own coaches. In fact, my life didn’t dramatically change until I got a coach on my side. So, yes, do Ho’oponopono, and do everything you are inspired to do, but use and rely on your Miracles Coach to accelerate your process. You’re always going to make progress doing things like Ho’oponopono, but you’re going to turn on the afterburners and turbocharge your life down the road when you have a Miracles Coach on your side. Janeen: www.miraclescoaching.com 175 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Sometimes, even when we’ve been at this for a while, there’s a tendency to worry about things like money. Students have a tendency to get hung up and ask, “How do I not worry about how I will be provided for?” Joe: This is a biggie, and I understand that feeling, but there’s a perception shift we’ve got to make. I can remember points in my life where I thought, “I understand everybody is saying that I’m supposed to trust and the grass grows by itself, but where’s the money and how’s it going to get to me?” When you’re feeling desperate, or getting caught up in the “how,” such as, “How am I going to pay my bills? How am I going to find my romance? How am I going to heal myself? How am I going to get my new car and my new house? How am I going to do all these things?” it’s a sign there’s something going on underneath the surface. What you’re really saying is that you have a fear it’s not going to work out, or, maybe more specifically, not going to work out for you. These fears need to be addressed and nipped in the bud because you attract what you love and what you fear. If you keep on fearing desperation and not attracting what you want, you will tend to attract more of that in your life. If you look out your window right now, wherever you are in the world, you can see God. It may look like trees, buildings, cars, and people walking around. It may look like puppies and kitties playing. Regardless of what you see, it’s the miracle of the universe before your eyes. Whatever is out there, a life force keeps it going. Trees will keep growing, people moving around will keep moving, and dogs www.miraclescoaching.com 176 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. and cats playing will keep playing. Even the building has a force within it – people in it working. Wherever you look out the window, life is there. Then, in this moment, stop and recognize that this same life force is in you. It’s pumping your heart, moving cells and blood throughout your body, and keeping your brain alive. You’re reading this. You’re taking in everything. Your conscious and unconscious mind is working, taking care of you right now. You are being taken care of right now. Pause and let that sink in. Of course, at this point, most people think, “Sure, I know my body is taking care of me, but how is my life being taken care of? How are my bills being taken care of?” The same force that’s animating everything you see outside your window, animating your body right now, will take care of your bills as long as you dissolve your limiting beliefs. The only thing stopping the flow of money, or romance, or whatever it is that you’re looking for are your beliefs about it. As you clear those beliefs, the same force that keeps you and everything out your window alive will allow whatever you’re looking for to come into your life. You’ll be able to hear the whisperings of the Divine telling you what to do, and take inspired action towards it. Although you may not understand this right now, allow it to sink in. You are already being taken care of. Your life is a gift. This moment is a miracle. All the things you long for will be given to you the more you are grateful for what you already have, and the more you release negativity, or limiting beliefs and www.miraclescoaching.com 177 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. programs, in your unconscious mind. The faster you release, the faster you will attract what you want. The bottom line is, we’re being taken care of already, but we don’t always know it, or at least acknowledge it. Janeen: You’re saying to appreciate what is, and this will alleviate the feeling of desperation. Joe: That’s a great synopsis. The whole of my message is that when you can appreciate the moment you have and your being in it, your whole life will transform. But what most people do, and I’ve done it, too, is look at their life and say, “I appreciate some things. I don’t appreciate all things. And I really want it to change.” It doesn’t work that way. You have to be grateful for, and fully present in, this moment – which includes you, your partner, and whatever you see out the window and around you. Out of that totality of gratitude, you can then say, “Wouldn’t it be cool if, in my next moments, I attracted more income, a better job, this relationship, this health, this home?” Being in the moment with gratitude is the fundamental miracle, and allows you to more easily attract what you want. But it starts in this moment – that’s the miracle. Janeen: So when we have desperation, we’re looking at what we think we don’t have. We’re looking at what we’re not, rather than appreciating what is. www.miraclescoaching.com 178 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. I’ve heard you say many times that the more you see, the more you will see. Does this work with money? Is that why you encourage us to keep a success journal? Joe: It ties into what we’ve been talking about – that you tend to attract what you’re already focused on. If you’re looking out the window, complaining about what you see, you’re probably going to have moments like that coming up. On the other hand, if you’re looking out the window and say, “Oh, yes. I do see the tree is beautiful, and that person walking is wonderful. I see this bird flying. It’s amazing,” you will tend to see more of that. You simply tend to attract and notice what you’re already noticing, and this has everything to do with money. If you see that you have less than the money that you want, you’re going to tend to notice that from that point on. But if you can look and say, “Thank goodness I have this much money. It’s more than a lot of people – and some don’t have any. This amount of money is perfect for me, right here in this moment and this time,” then that’s what you’ll see more of. You’ll see more money coming to you because you’re noticing the reality with gratitude. It’s simply a matter of you receiving more of what you focus on. So start to refocus on these things: What you’re grateful for What’s good What’s positive www.miraclescoaching.com 179 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. What you love What you want to see Where you want to go Janeen: The Science Channel recently had a show about how our eyeballs actually see, and it’s similar to what you’re saying. The unconscious mind projects upon the visual cortex, radiates it through the optic nerve, and bounces it off the lens in our eyeballs so that – literally – our past memories are being projected onto our future. In other words, we see what we expect to see. And this, of course, is why Ho’oponopono is needed – to erase those memories. Joe: It’s mindboggling, but that’s the reality of what’s happening. Consciously we don’t know what’s going on. We can’t steer our ship or even see where we’re going. Yet that’s what’s going on in our world, in real time, and how our unconscious processes what’s happening out there. We simply have to get clear because consciously we don’t have a clue. Janeen: All we’re seeing is the past, projected onto the future. Joe: Yes, and that’s a dangerous driver. www.miraclescoaching.com 180 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Janeen: A lot of our students have expressed an interest in ways to elevate societal consciousness. Are there any think tanks, mastermind groups, or things like that which they could participate in? Joe: Yes, a phenomenal amount. There are movements, organizations, and individuals everywhere doing wonderful things to heal, awaken, help, and bring wholeness to the planet. To find them, I’d recommend the book, The Practical Visionary, which lists people and movements working in many areas of life. I believe it’s available on both Amazon Kindle and in printed form. In the area of green energy, for example, people are trying to make solarpowered and water-powered cars. They’re also working with greenhouses and food production trying to make wholesome, natural food. For example, grains grown today aren’t like the ones my grandmother used to make pasta when I was a kid. Our food has changed, and there are people doing something about that. Water supply is a big issue, as well, especially in foreign countries like Africa. Actors like Matt Damon put forth time, effort, and money to increase the water supply and give it to places that need it. Then there are people working with mass consciousness, which is something I’ve focused on. If you’ve followed my emails a while, you know there’ve been several times over the years when I’ve asked my entire list to focus on a result, like during the fires in Texas with thousands of people were losing their homes. I sent www.miraclescoaching.com 181 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. out an email asking everyone to focus on rain – and that very day it started to rain. We received more rain over the next couple of months, and the fires were put out. Many people in the entertainment industry are working to make movies that elevate and awaken people. Next month I’ll be attending a meeting for the Transformative Leadership Council, where hundreds of evolved people, movers and shakers on the planet, are doing something unique to make a difference, including the author of The Practical Visionary. So do some research, read the book, Google different ideas online, and get educated – but also make quiet time and ask Divinity. Pray for guidance, “What role would you like me to participate in?” In a personal example, I’m creating Operation Yes, a movement to end homelessness in this country. I work with people and make contributions to different families. While I feel guided to do this, but that doesn’t mean you should work on homelessness, too. Just check within yourself and ask, “What do I really care about? What could I make a difference in?” And you can make it a win-win by asking, “How can I help the planet and help myself in the process?” Again, the book, The Practical Visionary, can be inspiring and a great brainstorming tool. Janeen: Can you tell us more about the Transformative Leadership Council? Joe: www.miraclescoaching.com 182 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. It’s a group that Jack Canfield (co-author of Chicken Soup for the Soul) and others started years ago. They’re self-help, personal growth, and highly evolved spiritual teachers, people you’ve seen on TV or read. We get together to rest and relax, exchange notes, and talk about what we’re doing. For example, a year ago I taught everybody Ho’oponopono, and now they’re sharing it with other people. It’s a way to share information so it goes downstream, and a great organization. Janeen: Joe, it’s been absolutely luscious being here with you. Thank you. Joe: You’re welcome, Janeen. Remember to stay the course because magic and miracles are here now – just open your eyes, look out the window, and there they are. God speed to all of you. www.miraclescoaching.com 183 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Secret Session #10 Joe Vitale with Gregory Downey Gregory: Without further ado – welcome, Joe. Joe: Thank you. It’s great to be here. I always look forward to getting together to share our stories, insights, and wisdom – so let’s share the love. Gregory: Absolutely, the floor is yours. Joe: Well, let’s start dancing. First, I’d like to get everybody on the same page and be here now. So take a deep breath, let it out slowly, and realize that, in this moment, there’s nothing else for you to do, nowhere else for you to go. Focus on something you feel grateful for right here, right now. It could be the fact that you’re sitting or standing or laying wherever you’re at. Just find something you’re genuinely grateful for and get into the feeling of gratitude. Let that expand through your body, feeling grateful for this moment. You are in this moment. There’s nothing for you to do right now. Whatever was going on is gone for the moment. You are here, and you are feeling grateful for whatever item www.miraclescoaching.com 184 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. or experience you’ve chosen. Gratitude is the single most powerful thing you can do to transform yourself in any moment, and you can do it right now. I’m inviting you to be here in this moment, and to take in what we’re about to share. Gregory: I’m thankful for the early snow we’ve gotten the past couple of days because we didn’t get much moisture during the summer. The changing of the seasons is here, and the snow is letting us know that winter is upon us and we can look forward to more moisture. I’m grateful for this time of year as we move into the holiday season. It’s a time for family and friends, sharing and celebration. Regardless of what holidays are observed this season, it’s a time when we reflect on, and are grateful for, the world around us. And speaking of the holidays, what are some things people can do to deal with all the overspending, or crazy holiday schedules and activities? Joe: First, remind yourself that you’re the one in control of your schedule, and you don’t have to do everything. For example, I get invited to lots of events, but often prefer to be by myself at home. I’m very picky about where I go, and don’t want to overstress myself. As far as overspending, refuse to do it. It’s not worth getting into a place where you’re feeling desperate or tapping out credit cards. Sometimes the greatest gifts are the ones you don’t buy, and create yourself. www.miraclescoaching.com 185 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. For example, about forty years ago, when I was in college and had next to no money, I wanted to give my father something for his birthday, so I wrote a letter by hand and mailed it. He still has that letter, and it astonishes me that he repeatedly talks about it. It meant more to him than anything I ever bought for him, or anything I could have bought for him. So, rather than a spending spree, why not go on a creativity spree? I’ve had people make me a scarf by hand, cookies, and other gifts. So I’d be thinking more in terms of what would be fun that you could create. Maybe write a poem or short story for a friend – or make lasagna. The point is you don’t need to spend a lot of money, go into debt, or tap out credit cards, and you certainly don’t need to be feeling stressed. That’s not the purpose of the holidays. I would focus on feeling love and gratitude, and find ways to express that through some sort of free, or almost free, creative expression. Gregory: It could be writing a song, playing guitar, and serenading your loved one. I have six children ranging from ages one to thirteen, and my wife established a tradition in our family that each of our children make, find, or create something for each other at Christmas. So we’ll go on a nature walk as a family, and the kids are encouraged to find something they think would be fascinating or interesting to one of their siblings. There’s energy in that – energy that may not be transferred when buy a DVD player, for example. It’s like the letter you wrote your dad. When you put your pen to the paper, a part of you goes into that. www.miraclescoaching.com 186 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Joe: Yes, that’s one of the greatest gifts. Gregory: In terms of getting stressed with schedules and the amount of activities, like you said, you learn where to say no, set up boundaries, and invite people to come to your place sometimes. Don’t feel like you have to go to everybody else’s house and fit their schedule. You’re not going to make everybody happy all of the time. Given that some of the events around holidays often involve more family time, how can people manage their energy and thoughts around negative family members? Joe: First, keep in mind that these other people, the ones you’re calling negative, represent a part of you that you’re not owning in the moment. Reality, as you perceive it, is a mirror reflection of your unconscious beliefs and thoughts. When you come across people that appear negative, the reason it’s bothering you is that the negativity is in you. The problem isn’t that the other person is voicing negativity or complaining, but that it’s pushing a button in you. Rather than blame them, simply acknowledge to yourself that they’re doing you a wonderful service by showing you where you have work to do. Once you have that understanding, you can look at them far more detached, almost like a curiosity, and not get caught up in whatever they’re saying. You’ll be unperturbed. This is one of my favorite words – imperturbability, which means you’re not bothered by outside circumstances. www.miraclescoaching.com 187 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. This is where the internal work of looking at your own belief system will really make a difference for you. It goes back to paying attention to any negative thoughts, and noticing and separating yourself from them. You can even make a game of it with other people. When you’re at work, or a family gathering over a holiday, and people start talking about negativity, take control and change the subject, or find something more positive to talk about. For example, Lou Ferrigno, the actor who played the Hulk, recently visited me. I noticed he kept asking questions, such as, “What time of the morning do you get up? What do you do next, and after that what do you do, and after you have your coffee what do you do?” He also asked me about my relationship. “How long have you known Nerissa? How long have you been married?” Then, we discovered we had a mutual interest in a famous bodybuilder, Steve Reeves, and he asked me about that. He controlled the conversation, but he did it out of genuine, loving curiosity. It made me feel important, and it kept the conversation on positive ground. You can do this with anybody by showing positive interest in them. You don’t have to talk about whatever negative thing they might bring up – just find something positive to talk about. As a last resort, you can walk away – and I’ve done it. I’ve been at family gatherings where I’ve used all of my techniques, and at a certain point had to say to myself internally, “I guess I have some work to do on myself yet. I don’t know where else to take the conversation, so I’m going for a walk.” There’s nothing wrong with this. It’s not about blaming anybody, or thinking they’re wrong or negative – it’s about realizing they represent a part of you, and using it as a personal development exercise. www.miraclescoaching.com 188 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Gregory: Sometimes people struggle with their family, so it’s a good opportunity to grow. For example, a student told me she went to a family reunion and saw people she hadn’t seen in years. During that interim, she’d made positive life changes, and even written a book. She said, “The energy was really weird. A lot of these people had an impression of me from 10 years ago. When I was around them, I started questioning myself. It made me wonder, ‘Am I really who or what I think I am? Am I really great at what I do?’” Her impression was that she was picking up energy from them that was clouding her collective thought energy field. She said, “It’s no wonder I distance myself from these individuals.” She ended up leaving, feeling that what she was picking up was a reflection of the fact that she had progressed and they had not. What do we do, though, if we live or work with negative people and can’t get away from them? How do we handle the negativity? Joe: We’ve got to remember that these people are actually helping us, and that takes a giant leap in total responsibility. I know how easy it is to say, “Hell, no, they’re not helping me; they’re bringing me down, like poison to my wellbeing,” but the truth of the matter is they’re showing you where you have some work to do. I think it was Ram Dass, one of the great spiritual teachers and authors, who said, “If you really want to know if you’re enlightened or not, go back and visit your family.” www.miraclescoaching.com 189 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Your family knows your hot buttons and how to push them. They know how you think, your behavior, and your patterns. But when you’ve cleaned and cleared yourself – healed yourself – you can go back to those situations and not be perturbed at all. It’s simply your belief system that gets triggered by people who know how to trigger it. So it’s you that needs to be changed, not other people, and this is why we’re all in Miracles Coaching™ working on ourselves. We’re dismantling the software in our brain that has that kind of wiring. I’ve worked on myself so much that when I go back to family gatherings now, usually nothing happens – no buttons get pushed, and I can be totally at bliss. If a conversation is going in a way I don’t care to indulge in, I walk away and don’t participate. People can be in victimhood, and I’ll be detached from it. I can sit there and do Ho'oponopono inside myself saying, “I love you. I’m sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you.” I’ll work on myself in the hopes that it will help them, but I’m not getting my buttons pushed. That’s the lesson. The real work is when you’re around people that you call negative. Remember, you only perceive them as negative because they’re pushing your buttons, and, really, it’s a great gift. It’s an opportunity to talk with your Miracles Coach and say, “Help me dismantle the wire, the button in me, so I can go back and visit my brother, my sister, my parents, my friends, high school people, and not be perturbed – in fact, maybe even think it’s funny.” Gregory: It’s easier to forgive somebody if you look at what you’ve gained, and how you’ve grown as an individual as a result of your interaction. www.miraclescoaching.com 190 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Rather than assign meaning and judgment to their behaviors, or to how you’ve been affected, the key is to see who you are as a result of that relationship, and learning to be grateful for the ways in which you’ve grown. I went through this with my own father. He was an extremely negative individual and we had a terribly challenged relationship. I would use it as a way of excusing my lack of progress in my life and being a victim. One of the ways I overcame that was to recognize that having him as a father, and being raised in that household, helped me learn to pick myself up. When the chips are down, I take the opposite role and refuse to be a victim. My father was who he was so I could be who I am today. Joe: Yes, we get thrown into these families, but who knows who set it up? Maybe we chose it before we were born so that it would help us build our strength. We don’t know. The bottom line is it ends up being something good for us, and I love that. Gregory: Yes, rather than looking at it from a victim stance, I see the many ways that people have helped me by being who they are. Sometimes when I’m saying Ho'oponopono, in the back of my mind I’m thinking, “I am so sorry that you have to endure the suffering that you’re enduring so that I can learn to become who I need to be, who I’m supposed to be, in this life.” And, at the same time, I’m grateful. I believe we’re all connected, and gratitude is the gateway to forgiveness. www.miraclescoaching.com 191 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Joe: Yes, I believe gratitude is the most powerful thing you can do – and you can do it anywhere, anytime. Even in situations that seem negative or desperate, just pause, take a deep breath, and find something in that moment to be grateful for and focus on it. It could be for the turkey drumstick on the table, or a kitty cat walking by. There’s always something, and focusing on it and feeling grateful will expand the energy in you so that you start to feel grateful all the way through your body. Your perception will completely change. Gregory: It’s interesting you mentioned the turkey drumstick. I’ve been reading the book, Messages from Water and the Universe, about the concept of blessing and giving gratitude for your food. My take on that is it changes the physical and emotional relationship that you have with your food. As a result, your food affects you differently, which is amazing, especially if you’re someone who has struggled with weight, like I have. Over the years I have learned to change my emotional relationship with food through gratitude, and my body was able to release the excess weight I was holding onto. Joe: That same thing can happen with your relationship with people. www.miraclescoaching.com 192 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Just as you experienced your relationship with food changing because of having gratitude towards food, your relationship to other people changes when you have gratitude for other people. It’s the same formula in another dimension. Gratitude works on all levels and in all situations. I don’t care what the problem is – feel grateful for it, and include the people you originally perceived as negative. Find something to be grateful for in them and, at that moment, you will transform yourself, as well as them. Gregory: I agree 100% that how we respond to other individuals gives them an opportunity to change and to grow, and to expand themselves. It’s especially important, as we go into the holidays, because we increase our contact with people, whether we’re shopping or in the bank. It’s a time of year to be more cognizant and empathetic toward people, and to show extra appreciation and gratitude for what they may be going through. Is there something we can do on a consistent basis to manage our thinking throughout the day and stay more present – a way to train our mind and keep it from going down negative thought paths? Joe: If you’re thinking negatively, it’s because of your past training. You’ve learned how to think that way largely because you overheard other people talking, which reflected their thoughts, and you concluded this is how the world thinks. And, for most of us, it’s usually in a line of negativity. We’re critical of ourselves, www.miraclescoaching.com 193 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. we’re critical of others. We look from a “What if it all goes wrong?” kind of scenario more often than not. So the first thing to do is pay attention to it. Notice how you’re thinking and, as you’re noticing it, you’ll start to become aware that you’re suffering from your thinking – and that’s a big, powerful clue as to what to do about it. In other words, there’s your thinking, and then there’s your observing of your thinking. Some part of you is separate from your thoughts. You’ve got thoughts going on in your head, but you’re also the observer, the witness, to those thoughts. This gives you great control because now you can start to realize, “Oh, I’m not my thinking. I’m actually observing my thinking.” Next, begin to train yourself to think in a more positive way. Part of it will happen naturally because, as you notice your thoughts, you’ll begin to realize, “I don’t really care for those thoughts that are coming by, the negative ones, so let me just let those slide on by, and start creating new thoughts.” This is all within your control. I’ve talked many times about a favorite process of mine called “What if up?” It’s from the book, What If It All Goes Right? by Mindy Audlin. The idea is to start thinking along the lines of, “What if it all goes right? What if this all works out? What if my day is fantastic? What if the next few moments are the ones that really open up my heart and change the course of my life? What if the miracles are right here and they’re also coming around the corner?” In contrast, most of us have “What if down?” thoughts such as, “What if it doesn’t go right?” When you have thoughts like this that pull you down, you can’t help but feel it because your energy drops. You’re not as happy, or confident about what’s going to be happening next. www.miraclescoaching.com 194 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. You can take control of your thoughts and ride them like a horse in a new direction. Instead of dropping the energy, you raise the energy when you have thoughts like, “What if it goes right? What if this works out? What if I get the deal? What if I get the raise? What if I get the car? What if I get the romance? What if I get healthy?” You can “What if” yourself in a positive direction to raise your vibration. So right off the bat, I’d say be aware of your thoughts. Realize that you are separate from your thoughts, and start to train yourself to have more positive ones. If you catch a negative one, say something to the effect of, “Hey, thanks for sharing. See you around,” and then replace it with a thought you prefer having. Gregory: Students are often skeptical and will say things like, “The odds are this whole thing is going fall apart,” so we work with them to reverse that skepticism. Humans have a natural tendency towards skepticism, and you can use this to be skeptical of a negative outcome. You can say to yourself, “You know, the odds are it’s not going to fall apart, or go badly. The odds are this person isn’t going to leave me” or whatever the natural skepticism might be. Joe: That’s a brilliant technique, and when you do that, it demonstrates that you have control. Most of our thinking is so habitual, we don’t question it, but here we’re saying, “Hey, let’s question it. Let’s redirect it, move it in a new direction, and www.miraclescoaching.com 195 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. show it who’s boss.” You’re the person observing the thoughts, and the opening is in being aware you’re not them. You do have choice. Gregory: A lot of people condemn themselves because of their thoughts, as though it’s part of their identity. I tell my students, “Not only are you not your thoughts, you’re not your actions or your behavior. You don’t have to identify yourself by something that you did in the past, as long as you’re not doing that thing anymore.” Joe: Exactly, and I’ll take it a bit further. When I decided to be a songwriter two years ago, I took a workshop with Ray Wylie Hubbard, a well-known singer-songwriter. He talked about thoughts that will show up in your mind, thoughts I was having, like, “I’m not a songwriter or singer. I can’t do that.” The way he handles it is by asking himself, “Where’s the proof? Where’s the proof that you can’t do that?” When he said that, I thought, “My God, he’s right. I have no evidence whatsoever that I can’t sing, play the guitar, record music, or write my own song. There’s no evidence.” And I did, in fact, prove myself wrong. I have four CDs out now, and am about to record a fifth. By questioning those thoughts and realizing, “Those are thoughts and that’s not reality,” I could actually “What if up?” and say, “What if I do write songs that are really great? What if I do start singing and it turns out to be profound?” That felt better and enabled me to get into the studio. www.miraclescoaching.com 196 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. It’s all a matter of paying attention to your thoughts and not believing them. You are separate from them. Choose the ones that empower you and let them help you get to where you want to go. Gregory: Is there any truth to the concept that we become what we think about most of the time so, therefore, we need to learn to control or guide our thinking? Or, is the concept of controlling and guiding your thinking a form of resistance? For example, let’s say I’m trying to think more on purpose, and decide to carry a 3 x 5 card with bullet points from my vision statement, or I write down things I’m grateful for. Then, while I’m pumping gas, I pull out the card because I don’t want my mind to wander off. I want to direct it towards things I want. Is that a little forced and contrived, or is that a good principle? Joe: It’s outstanding and, in fact, I’d make it even simpler. You don’t even have to pull the card out and read it – just reach into your pocket and touch it. That’s all you need to do to remind yourself of your goals. You’ve already read them and written them down, so subconsciously, you already know what they are. You’re just reminding yourself of them. Also, numerous books and teachers talk about writing your goals and putting them everywhere – on your mirror and computer, the back of your phone, or in a software program that’ll pop up on your phone or computer. Any of these are useful techniques to learn to control your mind. At first, it might seem a little contrived because, generally, we like to float through life. And www.miraclescoaching.com 197 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. certainly there’s nothing wrong with floating through life if you’re already thinking positive, feeling grateful, and realizing miracles – already happy, healthy, and at peace. However, most of us aren’t. We’re still in the struggling stages of trying to leave victimhood and become more empowered and awakened, so having all the tools available is wise. They help you get to where you want to go – even something as simple as having a card with the word grateful on it, and throughout the day touching it to remind yourself to find gratitude in the moment. Whatever keeps you focused in the right direction is useful, until one day you’ll wake up and realize that your mind’s already there. For example, it’s incredibly rare for me these days to have to do anything with my mind in terms of redirecting thoughts because they’re all going in a positive direction. But when I was homeless and in poverty, I felt melancholy and miserable – even suicidal. People would see me and say, “You look depressed and unhappy.” This never happens today because of all the work I did and all the tools I use, including putting the card in my pocket. I’d put pictures on the mirror, create vision boards, read positive books, listen to positive audios, and tune into the right programs. I didn’t have Miracles Coaching™ then, otherwise I would have enrolled in it myself just to help me turbocharge and accelerate the process of transformation. Gregory: A lot of students get confused in the beginning about the idea of controlling their thinking. They’ll say, “If you’re trying to control your thinking, doesn’t that take you out of flow?” www.miraclescoaching.com 198 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. It’s counterintuitive, but current habits require you to do something else enough times that those become habitual, replacing the old, and now you’re in a new flow. Joe: Yes, that’s the whole point. When I was in college and unhappy, I remember a friend of mine saying I was “naturally pessimistic.” Yet, today, people say, “Joe, you’re naturally optimistic.” But wait a minute, which is it? Am I naturally pessimistic or am I naturally optimistic? Forty years ago, I was naturally pessimistic because that was my flow based on my thought patterns at that time. As I worked on it, took control and changed it, a new flow took place. Now I am naturally optimistic. There’s a clue here. If everything’s working fine for you, you’re happy, getting the results you want, everything is blissful, and you’re experiencing gratitude and miracles, then, hey, stay in that flow. If, however, you’re having struggles, bumps in the road, and moments of despair, struggle, or uncertainty, with no miracles, happiness, or health – then you need to do something about that. Take control, redirect your mind, your energy, your vibration, until it becomes the new flow. When it’s the new flow, let go and enjoy. Gregory: It’s like when you hear someone say, “Oh, he’s a natural born salesman.” Joe: www.miraclescoaching.com 199 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. People tell me, “Joe, you’re a natural born writer,” and I think, “Maybe it looks like that now.” I can remember when I was in high school putting myself through a selfstudy program, walking to the library a mile and a half away. I’d stay in there all day writing books and articles, most of which were not very good. In reality, they may have even been atrocious, but I was practicing writing. I kept doing it because I was learning the new flow, creating a habit that was teaching me a new skill. Now fifty years later, it looks like, “Oh, he was born writing.” Well, no, I wasn’t. Gregory: They’re not seeing the journey. Joe: Or the struggle. Gregory: Hearing experiences like this definitely helps me take things to heart, because sometimes it can seem like there are too many outside factors to have any obvious influence over our life. For example, how do we change our beliefs about our ability to earn more at our job? What if someone’s earning potential is restricted to receiving a raise or getting a promotion? Joe: www.miraclescoaching.com 200 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. I remember working for a big oil company in Houston decades ago, at a time when I was reading prosperity books. I’d read about having money and riches beyond my reach, more than I ever imagined in my life, and think, “How? I’m earning a particular salary. There’s a ceiling on how much I can earn. How can more money come to me?” The thing to realize is that we’re stuck in a one dimensional thought pattern when we think money can only come from that particular source. I think it’s Bob Proctor who says, “Money doesn’t come to you from the company that you work for. It comes to you through them. It’s one means of receiving more.” When I first heard that I thought, “Well, that’s a mind expanding thought, but I still don’t get it because I’m working for this company. Money’s coming through them and there must be money available elsewhere, but how do I attract it? How do I receive it?” As I did more work, I was able to realize I was only seeing a tiny sliver of a gigantic pie, thinking that the only possible way in the entire universe for me to receive money was through my position at that job. It took me a while to expand my mind and say, “Wait a minute. What if I did something else instead of that job, or in addition to that job?” That’s when I wrote my first book, which gave me another avenue of money. Then I started speaking about that book, and that gave me yet another avenue. And it didn’t stop there because I went on to do consulting around that topic, bringing in more money. All of this happened while I still worked for the oil company – that’s the punch line. So instead of thinking, “I’m stuck at this job, and the only money I can get, or the ceiling on the amount of money I can get, is what the company is giving me and has determined that I will receive,” expand that and say, “Well, right now, I am working for that company, but that’s not all that’s available to me. What else www.miraclescoaching.com 201 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. would I like to do?” In my case, it was writing a book, speaking, and then consulting, which created other streams of income. The world has so many possibilities it would stagger the conscious mind. All you have to do is recognize that it can come to you in other ways, not just from your vocation – although, remember, your company can always change, too, and offer you more. They can change their rules, increase the pay, or give you some sort of bonus. There are all sorts of possibilities just in that realm. However, you can expand further and say, “Wait a minute, the universe could surprise me by somehow giving me money from some place I can’t even imagine.” The whole point is that it’s possible, once you realize it’s an unlimited universe, and who you are in it. Gregory: In 1958, in his book, The Strangest Secret, Earl Nightingale taught that we just have to focus on giving value in all the areas we can, whether that’s at our job, or simply to people we come into contact through kind words. He said that most of the time the wealth and abundance you receive will come to you through sources other than the individual that you’re directly serving – that you could give service to one person, but the compensation, or reward, would come from a completely different source that the universe has determined for you. Joe: That’s a wonderful point and I’m glad you brought it up. www.miraclescoaching.com 202 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Trust is definitely involved here, along with faith and creativity. You have to get out of a limited mindset because the world of possibilities is right there waiting for you. Opening your mind, taking action on your dreams, and following your passion are all clues to that extra wealth that you seek. Gregory: I tell students that if they want to receive more from the universe, it requires a trade or exchange – even if they’re not sure the action they’re taking is the right one, or going to result in anything. The universe will recognize it. The universe looks at merit and will reward an individual because of their intention and their willingness to sacrifice time, energy, and effort toward a worthy goal. As long as they’re doing something, taking action, and moving forward, that’s the key. Let go of the attachment to outcome and just put forth an effort. Joe: Yes, serve more and give more – those are the mantras. Gregory: You’ve been doing that a long time through both your Hypnotic Marketing ideas, and teaching other internet marketers how to use the Law of Attraction in their online marketing efforts. You’ve helped individuals make millions of dollars online – literally, millions upon millions. Joe: www.miraclescoaching.com 203 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Thank you for acknowledging that – a lot of people who know me from the spiritual, Law of Attraction side don’t know that I’m also an internet marketer. I was doing that first, before “The Secret” came along, and after I was in that movie, I was blown into outer space, so to speak. Gregory: That brought you out of the online marketing underground, so now you’re known among people in all kinds of other industries. In fact, a lot of our Miracles Coaching™ students are building a business, either online or offline, and they come to us because we also offer a wonderful coaching program that deals with Hypnotic Marketing, alongside using the Law of Attraction in marketing. We can address so many needs for people, from the deeper spiritual side to the nuts and bolts of an online business. For example, one of our students wanted to know why your e-mails appear in small columns. He asked, “Is this a Hypnotic Marketing technique, or is this just the way that it looks in my e-mail?” Joe: I do it on purpose because my e-mails are going to hundreds of thousands of people all over the world, each using different devices to read the e-mail – iPhone, iPad, Mac, PC, Samsung – you name it. I wrote one of the first books on internet marketing in 1995, so I’ve been doing this a long time. I’ve learned that the most common denominator is to use a column-like approach in my e-mail, so that when you open it, you can read it easily and effortlessly. Without that, the e-mail can appear broken up, which makes it www.miraclescoaching.com 204 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. difficult to read. I’ve seen e-mails that are like magazine articles, where the text runs all the way across the screen and it gets broken up. People end up struggling to read it and often don’t get past the first couple of lines. So I do it for ease – it makes the writing and reading much breezier. Gregory: I also understand that, from a marketing standpoint, if an e-mail looks convoluted and has long sentences, people automatically don’t want to read it. Joe: Yes, that’s right. Gregory: We’re getting close to the end of our time together today, and on that note, I’d like to ask a powerful question that came from one of our students, “I know intellectually that there is no such thing as deservingness, but can you help me get that into my feelings? I do Ho'oponopono, but I still feel that I must earn universal favor.” Joe: I believe there is such a thing as deservingness, but I also believe it’s your birthright. In other words, because you’re here, because you’ve been given this gift of life – the most majestic miraculous indescribable gift of the cosmos – you deserve www.miraclescoaching.com 205 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. everything that life offers. You’ve won the great lottery of life, and, as a result, you get to have all of the gifts. The deservingness is built in. When people try to establish some sort of criteria for deservingness, for example, when they say, “I want a new car, but I don’t deserve it because I haven’t earned it, or I haven’t done the right thing,” or whatever, that’s a fabrication of the mind. It’s simply a thought system that’s twisting things around, keeping us down or in misery. This moment is the miracle we’re all seeking. The very fact that you’re here in this moment is part of the gift of life. You deserve everything that you desire and dream automatically. There are no pre-qualifications in the Divine life. God isn’t asking you to fill out an application before you get your car, or anything else. Nobody is saying you have to take a test before you can get your new car, home, job, or whatever it is that you want. Your mind can do that, however, and this is where you want to shine the light and pay attention. That’s a form of negative, limiting programming that you want to, and can, release. Once you realize that you can have what you want simply because you want it, you’ve made a very powerful statement. I’m going to even repeat it. You can have what you want simply because you want it. No other rationalizations are needed. No other testing, qualifications, evidence, or proof. This is empowering. www.miraclescoaching.com 206 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Whatever qualifiers your mind might throw out, you’ve got to tell yourself that it’s your mind saying that. You don’t have to justify anything to anybody. You are here. That’s the great gift. That is the miracle. You deserve it all. So the dreams that bubble up from inside you, whether you call it your intuition or your gut – however you think of it – those heartfelt experiences are for you, that is your birthright. That’s part of the gift, part of deservingness. No kind of pre-qualification is necessary. Gregory: What a wonderful principle. Joe, thank you so much for joining me here to sharing this beautiful wisdom with everyone. Joe: Thank you, I’m grateful for being here. God speed to all of you. www.miraclescoaching.com 207 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Secret Session #11 Joe Vitale with Gregory Downey Gregory: Joe, we just had a two-day Awakening Prosperity Bootcamp attended by a group of Miracles Coaching™ students from all over the United States and Canada, even Ireland. It was an amazing experience – people bonded, forged new relationships, and awakened old ones. In the feedback we’ve received, many students said they came in as one person and left as an entirely new individual. The Miracles Coaching™ program makes many of these awakenings possible for our students. We’re grateful for both our students and you, and the material you provide. Joe: That’s thrilling to hear, so thank you for sharing this. I like to start these sessions with gratitude, even a meditation, because that’s the single most powerful thing any of us can do to have an awakening right now. Almost all of us are seeking something, and when we’re doing that, we’re out of this moment. We’re looking down the road to the next thing, overlooking the power, magic, and miracle of the moment right now. It’s good to pause and take inventory, like you did in sharing about the event, where we can talk about, or relive it, in a sense, that’s a moment for gratitude we can all experience. www.miraclescoaching.com 208 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. So just for a moment, let’s take a deep breath, let it out, and realize there’s nowhere else to go. Focus on this moment. Look around the room and see things you can be grateful for – a physical object, like a phone or computer, or for something that happened today. It could be for the fact that you have a roof over your head, or for what you ate today. Maybe somebody smiled at you today or said something nice…whatever it happens to be. It’s by honing in to – and locking in on – this moment that awakenings can take place. That’s what it’s all about. Gregory: One of the things I am grateful for is nature, particularly at this time of year when I can get out, decompress, and feel my connection with the universe. I especially appreciate the energy of the water I love to fish in. It gives me the opportunity to get out of the daily grind and to be at one with my thoughts and my intentions. I am reminded of this as I look at a piece of art given to me by a friend, which has a poem inscribed on it: “Big fish swim in this river, foraging on a bed of gravel, in a rippling blanket of water. We’ve sought them and we’ve caught them. As I stand on the rocky bank, I become mesmerized by the sounds and vision of the river, and the land it travels through. I look to the west as the trout rise against the setting of the sun, the clouds roll over the ridge into the valley, and I sense in the periphery of my thoughts that we are heading home without filling our limits, only because we do not have any.” www.miraclescoaching.com 209 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. When I look at that I am constantly grateful for nature, good friends, and for those things we share and bring us together. On days when I feel trapped and pent up in the daily grind, I am grateful I have this release and outlet. I can go out and be one with nature, expressing gratitude for the creation around me. Joe: I love nature, too. I just bought the two acres adjacent to my property after wanting it for the longest time. I’m grateful to be able to have that property, so I can continue my experience of communion with nature. I didn’t want anybody to build on it or cut down trees. I wanted to be able to enjoy it, to respect the land and trees, and the life within them. Gregory: Speaking of nature and getting out, I understand you’ve been traveling. Joe: Yes, usually I’m in my studio working, so this is a change. I have two new books coming out next year, and, more importantly, I’ve been working on my music. I have four albums out now. The fourth was released a few weeks ago, so I traveled to Nashville and had a Grammy award-winning engineer master those songs on the CD. I had a blast doing music and checking out guitar stores. www.miraclescoaching.com 210 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Then I flew out to Los Angeles, where an early morning CBS television news show interviewed me about my book, Attract Money Now. While there, I had another Grammy award-winning engineer mix the music on my most recent CD. Gregory: Are you talking about the album you did with the drummer, Joe Vitale? Joe: Yes. I did two CDs with him, and he’s also on the most recent CD called “The Healing Song.” [You can listen to all 11 sample tracks at www.thehealingsong.com]. Joe Vitale is a world famous drummer who happens to have the same name as me. He’s been a gift from the gods. This man has 40 or 50 years of experience in rock and roll. He’s Neil Young’s drummer, Sammy Hagar’s drummer, he’s played for every rock and roll legend – and he’s on my CD! We’ve become great friends and it’s been a joyous experience. He doesn’t just play the drums. He can play the keyboard, he knows about engineering, he has suggestions on different things you can do with the music, and he’s a nice guy to boot. He offered all kinds of ideas and contributions. It was phenomenal. Later I went to New York, where there were two giant internet marketing conventions going on at the same hotel. That’s when I realized I’ve been living in the woods for a very long time – that many people in New York City overwhelmed me. New York alone is overwhelming, but the hotel was just swamped with people and activity. One morning when I called, they said it would be three and a half hours for room service! www.miraclescoaching.com 211 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Then I was in Canada to give a presentation to my peers, the Transformational Leadership Council. I was invited to speak about one of my books coming out next year called The Remembering Process. That was the first time I have given that presentation anywhere on the planet. My wife, Nerissa, recorded it so you can watch it on YouTube or my website. Gregory: That’s awesome, because it means more people can hear your message and take advantage of Miracles Coaching™. Joe: It’s an exciting time to be alive. Gregory: I have a series of questions from our coaching students, so let’s jump into them. First, how do you deal with self-doubt? So many people don’t believe they can be successful, start a business, or live a fulfilling life – yet they desperately want these things in their lives. Joe: The key word here is desperately – and that’s where you want to look first. When people are feeling desperate, they send off energy that things aren’t going to work out. In fact, they don’t believe anything is going to work out – and www.miraclescoaching.com 212 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. that’s why they’re feeling desperate. It’s signaling that deep inside they suspect success might be out there for other people, but not for them. Drop desperation from your energy field and, instead, come from a feeling of love, trust, and faith. I believe that faith is such an important aspect, I recently wrote an entire book about it. (Faith, released February 2013). So before anything, watch your language because it reveals what’s going on in your inner state. Part of the reason you’re feeling desperate is because you’re saying it. As you start to change your language, you’ll start to change your experience. You can neutralize those overpowering energies and relax into the moment by focusing on gratitude. This brings you back into the now where everything is entirely fine. From here, you can look around and tell yourself, “Oh, I am actually doing just fine. I’m okay, I’m living and breathing, everything is going fine. I’m in Miracles Coaching™, focused on my dreams. I’m going forward and I’m going to make miracles.” When you do this, you dilute the feeling of desperation. The next thing to realize is that you’re already a success. Sometimes this is tough for people to get, but regardless of who you are, or where you are, if you’ll stop and reflect over the course of your life, you’ll see that you have already done more, accomplished more, and succeeded in more things than many other people. I recently met with a celebrity who’s been in the world doing some fantastic things for over 12 years, but as he sat in my office, he said he felt like a failure. When I asked him how he could feel that way, he pointed out that he had not yet achieved what he really wants. Look at the dynamics here. This man is already a success in people’s eyes, mine included, yet he was dismissing all of his background, his years of www.miraclescoaching.com 213 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. experience, everything he’s already accomplished. He was only focusing on where he wanted to go. That’s a mental torture trap. Not only will you hurt yourself, you’ll find it difficult to move forward and achieve what you want because you’ve locked yourself up. Your energy is in desperation and, coming from that feeling, nothing is going to work out. I shared a favorite phrase with him that I got from a woman in Maui years ago. She said, “I’m totally satisfied, I just want more.” When you come from that kind of mentality, you can sit right where you are, no matter who you are, look at your life and say, “I’ve been a success. I went to school, I have a job, and I’ve managed to grow in whatever position I am at in life.” Do you realize how many people don’t have jobs, or haven’t gone to school, and still want to? They want some of the experiences and education that you already have and are taking for granted. This is why it’s so important to realize you’re already a success. You’ve succeeded in getting to where you are. Yes, you may want more – and there’s nothing wrong with wanting more. That’s what keeps us growing and moving ahead. But you want to strike a balance, realizing you’ve already achieved a tremendous amount. Gregory: It’s interesting you mention language because I often have students who say, “I really don’t want …I don’t want …I don’t want ….” Like you’ve said, we have to clearly identify what we don’t want, but that doesn’t mean we have to give it energy. We just have to call it out. www.miraclescoaching.com 214 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. So one of the things I help them do is say, “I am grateful I have this, this, and this, but I would rather ….” It helps them get out of the “I don’t want” or the “I need” mode. They might say, “I’m grateful for the car I have, but I would rather be driving a Porsche, especially for that trip.” Joe: I’d refine that just a bit. Instead of the word but, substitute the word and. For example, “I like the car I’m driving now and I would really love to have this thing,” whatever it is for that person. The word but sometimes clips people in their thought process by dismissing the thought that went before it. It’s not wrong, it’s just better to be able to say, like in my case, “I love the property I’m at, and I would really love to have the two acres that are beside me.” Gregory: That makes sense. The word but is dismissive. It’s like saying, “I really like you, but ….” It makes you wonder what’s coming next. Joe: Right, and that’s the thing to be aware of. We have to be careful about how we’re speaking because it’s reflecting our energy field and what we’re giving out. At the same time, I want to assure everybody of one thing: I don’t care who you are, where you are, what your bank account is, what your education is, or what your experience is, success at the level you want is entirely possible and doable. www.miraclescoaching.com 215 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. I read a book called Cheating the Impossible, by Philippe Petit. The author actually performed a tightrope wire act between the twin towers when they were still standing in New York City, walking across a thin wire eight times. He did it illegally and on his own, simply because he regarded it as impossible. My palms were sweating when I read it because I imagined being that high in the air. There are so many stories of people who have come to this country with nothing, less than two dollars in their pocket and no connections. Some couldn’t even speak the English, yet they went on to create what the rest of us call enormous success. That’s why I say that the success you want is entirely possible, doable, and achievable, for everybody, and I don’t care who you are. This is the whole point of Miracles Coaching™ – we’re going for miracles here. So you want to believe in yourself, know what’s possible, and absolutely keep going forward. Gregory: That’s a beautiful piece of advice. Another question we’ve received is “How can I improve my relationship with my wife? I’m doing everything I can think of but I can’t seem to open her heart. At this point she hates me. I do Ho’oponopono all the time, so please don’t say that.” Joe: When I hear questions like this, I’m always listening for a deeper level than the actual words being expressed. www.miraclescoaching.com 216 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. This person is, essentially, saying that his wife doesn’t have enough of an open heart, that her heart is closed. Really, though, it sounds like he has the closed heart, because he’s judging his wife and not accepting her as she is. Can you see this? Let me illustrate it in another way, using the property next to mine as an example. Before I bought it, the owners were going to build. I got aggravated about it and grumbled to Nerissa, “My serenity is going to be gone. I won’t be able to sit out on my porch and see the trees, have a cigar, and just relax. I’m going to be listening to construction for six months to a year, and then have neighbors beyond that.” My imagination started running away with me. I told her, “You know, if I was enlightened I’d put a stop to them. I’d find a way to turn off all the power tools and use superpowers to stop the construction.” Then I paused and thought, “Wait a minute. If I were enlightened, it wouldn’t bother me at all.” Do you see the difference? When you come from a base human level, your ego is involved and you want to change everybody else around you. We’re all human so there’s nothing wrong with that – it’s part of our learning experience, part of our awakening. But when you think it shouldn’t be some way, now you’re arguing with reality, and that’s not where the miracles are. Miracles happen when you accept the people around you. Finally I got to that point, and said, “Well, I’m a spiritual teacher, I teach self-help. I know all this stuff, I write all this stuff, so why am I allowing my neighbors building on that property to bother me?” Once I made peace with it, I www.miraclescoaching.com 217 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. decided that, “If they actually build, I’m cool with that. That’s the next step and what needs to happen.” When I became okay with it, that’s when I got the insight on how to create a win-win-win. I ended up with the property, and they built on another piece of property that was bigger and better. But I couldn’t see that opportunity when I was tied up in the thought, “I’ve got to change those people.” So this man doesn’t need to change his wife – he actually has more work to do on himself. When he can look at his own heart and say, “I love her just the way she is,” she will feel that. Right now she’s probably feeling the judgment energetically, and that doesn’t feel good to anybody. If you are out in the world, say at lunch or dinner with someone, or a meeting, and you sense someone is judging you, doesn’t like you, or wants you to change you in some way –you can feel it. And you won’t like it. This woman is feeling that. Gregory: Isn’t it generally the case that what we see in other people is a reflection of what is going on in ourselves? Joe: Yes, it isn’t about the woman opening her heart. Virtually 100% of the time, what you say about the other person you should be saying about yourself because that person is a reflection, a mirror. What you see in the other person, you can see in yourself – if you’ll look. www.miraclescoaching.com 218 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Gregory: So if you see something you don’t like in someone and think, “I really wish they’d change that,” you should rephrase that and say, “I really wish I would change that,” and change it in yourself first. Joe: Yes, that’s the nature of relationships – the great mirror fun house. Everywhere you look you see yourself, but you don’t know it. You took this ticket to ride in the fun house, to experience a room of mirrors. In every mirror you look it’s you, but you don’t know it because you think it’s the other people. And while it’s not about anyone else, it’s tempting to think that way, and the vast majority of people do. This kind of understanding can trigger an awakening, if you accept it in a loving way. This is what Miracles Coaching™ is about, elevating your consciousness so you can have an awakening. You have miracles happen by doing the work on yourself, not doing the work on other people. Gregory: Is it possible to want money too much? I had a student say, “I think I might be too attached to it.” How would they overcome that? Joe: When I hear this, it sounds like that person has the whisper of a possible fear – not even a real fear – because they say, “I think I may be too attracted to it.” They don’t say, “I know,” or “I’m positive…I’m certain…I’m obsessed.” This tells www.miraclescoaching.com 219 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. me that they’re just questioning it, and there’s nothing wrong with questioning your beliefs or motives. This person sounds like they’re actually doing the right thing – going after money because they want money. If you were obsessed with it and doing nothing than that 100% of the time, focusing on money while forgetting everything else – like your relationships, health, walking the dog, feeding your family – then I would probably say “Yes, I think you are out of balance.” All we really want to do with money is appreciate it. Money goes where it’s appreciated. I often use the quote, “The sole purpose of money is to express appreciation.” As long as we come from a place of “Money is cool, money is a nice tool, money is useful, money helps me get the end result of some things I want, money is a nice scorecard that tells me I am doing well in business,” there’s a neutrality there. You’re not focused on it too much at all, and it’s okay to have it. So I would invite anybody thinking about money to simply appreciate money. I’m doing all these different things, not because they make money – travel, music, and books – I’m doing it because my passion is doing it. I’m doing it because my life calling, my mission, my marching orders from God, if you will, tell me to do it. As I’m doing it, I know I’m living in the real world, and so my eye is on, “Does it make money? What is making money?” That’s not an obsession with money – it’s about knowing that if the money comes in, I get to keep pursuing my passion. Walt Disney once said, “I want to make money from my movies so I can continue making movies.” That’s a pure and innocent motive. I encourage people to let money be a nice tool, not your master, and be at peace with it. www.miraclescoaching.com 220 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Gregory: You often talk about Nevillizing as a process for manifesting, but how do you balance Nevillizing with not being attached to an outcome? Joe: Hopefully your passion is the outcome because in the Nevillizing process – the way Neville describes it – you go past the end result. For example, if you want a raise at your job by Friday, most people would sit and visualize receiving a raise by Friday. Visualization is powerful, but Neville would go to the point where it’s already happened. It’s over. It’s Saturday morning, you’re having breakfast with friends, and tell them, “You know what happened yesterday? I got a raise at work and it happened in the most spectacular, unexpected way. I didn’t even see it coming. Sure, I wanted it to happen. I announced that I wanted it, and here it is. It just showed up.” So it’s more or less joyfully imagining it as having happened, but not focusing on the end result with any sort of desperation. Sometimes people are concerned with questions like, “How do I focus on the end result and not worry about it? How do I Nevillize because, instead of it being fun, I’m worrying. How do I stop the worry and concern?” This goes back to having trust, faith, and gratitude, and living in this moment. Another idea, which I write about in The Attractor Factor, is to go ahead and state whatever your intention is, but end it with the phrase “this or something better.” www.miraclescoaching.com 221 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Most people focus on an end result and lock in on it. They must have the raise by 5:00 on Friday and it must be $100 more a week. They must have a certain car, they must have it at a certain time, and it must be a certain make and model. This is when worry and desperation settle in, because you’ve locked out all other possibilities. I’ve found that the way to attract miracles is to focus on what you want, but allow something better to come to you. I like something a friend of mine shared with me. He’ll say, “Wouldn’t it be cool if...?” and you just fill in the blank. That’s the attitude you want to have. For example, in my case, I said, “Wouldn’t it be cool if I got the property next door in some kind of way that was a win for me, a win for the people who own the property currently, and a win for the realtor?” If you wanted a raise, you could say, “Wouldn’t it be cool if I got the raise on Friday?” Want a car? Say, “Wouldn’t it be cool if I got the car that I’m imagining next month?” That language, that phraseology, frees you to be playful. Gregory: Nevillizing comes down to what life looks like as a result of getting what you want. That way, you don’t have to think about the outcome because you’re thinking about what life looks like as a result. Joe: So again, take the energy off desperation, worry, or fear, and come from trust, faith, love, and passion. Those more positive words are going to carry you in the direction of a blissful journey of miracles. www.miraclescoaching.com 222 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Gregory: In The Attractor Factor, you mention yagnas. Can you talk about that? Joe: A yagna is a ritual done in India to clear negativity and beliefs within you. I’ve been doing them for at least 10 years. I have people in India that perform the rituals, chanting in Sanskrit for me. They have my intentions written down and in their mind as they do this on my behalf. The service I use can be found at www.Yagnas.by-choice.org. There are others, but I can’t tell you the differences, or what’s better or worse. I continue to use them because it’s helped me, and is helping me. Gregory: Is that like asking somebody to do Ho’oponopono on your behalf? Joe: Yes, it is. While I think we should be doing everything on our own, I’m also enough of an open-minded scout and experimenter that I want to try everything avaiable. If there are services that say they can help do something for me, I’m going to try them. Gregory: I’m a “just in case” kind of guy myself. www.miraclescoaching.com 223 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Joe: You could say I’m stacking the deck in my favor. I’m also a scout. When I do these things for myself and find what’s working, I turn around and tell everybody else. I put it in my books, on my blog, and I tell the people at Miracles Coaching™, much like I’m doing right now. Gregory: That’s the story of your book, Zero Limits. You heard about Dr. Hew Len, found him, and wrote about it, which became, in my opinion, one of the best self-help books of all time. Joe: I’m hoping it will be a movie, and in fact, let’s position it this way: Wouldn’t it be cool if Zero Limits was transformed into an award-winning, lifechanging movie that had as much power, if not more, than “The Secret” did when it came out five or six years ago? Gregory: That would be cool if it happens. Joe: I’d say, “That will be cool when it happens.” Gregory: www.miraclescoaching.com 224 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Right, when it happens… Why don’t you tell us about the Law of Creation, exactly what it is? Joe: I can tell you that the big secret about it is action – and I cover this thoroughly in my audio program, The Abundance Paradigm. Action is how you move from the Law of Attraction into the Law of Creation. I make this distinction because a lot of people know about the Law of Attraction. They’ve watched the movie, “The Secret,” read it in one of my books, or heard it from other teachers. That’s one law, but not the only one. Without all the other laws, without taking action, for example, their results are fairly impotent. You can still get results with the Law of Attraction, but I want people to get miracles. That’s why this is called Miracles Coaching™. I always tell people, “Expect miracles.” Why? Because I think that’s what we can experience. I don’t think anything is impossible in the world at all. I think all limits are self-imposed. I don’t know any physical or psychological barriers actually out there. We keep discovering new planets, new systems, new science, and it just keeps going on and on. I’m coming from the space that miracles are entirely possible for us as long as we go for them, and going for them means taking action. That’s when we start to create. The real secret, the inner nugget inside the Law of Creation – is taking action, and for me that means following your passion, following your inspiration. Those are very high energy tools that come through you. This is not just you egotistically doing things – it’s what the mind is trying to do through you. www.miraclescoaching.com 225 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. When you follow your passion and inspiration, you start to co-create with God, if you will – with the Divine, or the Universe, and that’s where creation is taking place. You create through co-creation, using the Law of Attraction and the Law of Right Action. It’s all about action, creating what you want. Gregory: Have you ever had an experience where, as you start to give basic shape to a project, say a book, the project takes on an intelligence of its own, saying, “This is the direction I want you to take me,” and you feel it writing itself? Joe: Yes, yes, yes, yes, and YES! And I love that experience and can give you two examples. The book, Zero Limits, wrote itself. I completed it in two weeks, which is profoundly unusual. People usually take years to write books. In contrast, I gave six months of research and six months of writing to my book on P.T. Barnum, an entire year. With Zero Limits, I remember sitting down in December a few years ago, and as I started to move my hand, it became like taking dictation. It led me through that book and it became alive. And here’s the truth: I have written 50-something books, but when I read Zero Limits, it’s like somebody else wrote it, yet it was clearly me. I love that book, I love that process, and I love Dr. Hew Len, so when I had the opportunity, I sat down and joyfully began it – but the book led me. I have another example of something mystical and miraculous occurring, which has to do with a song on my new music CD, “Ghost Train.” I have a guitar www.miraclescoaching.com 226 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. made by Huss and Dalton, and one day I was strumming and fooling around with no real direction, when suddenly my hand started to do an unusual strumming pattern that I’d never done before. I’ve heard so much music in my life that I can’t say I hadn’t heard it before, but it was an unusual strum pattern. The next thing I knew moaning began coming out of me. I’d strum this unusual pattern a little, followed by this moaning sound. Then it turned into lyrics, as I started visualizing a couple waiting for a train. I didn’t know what was happening. I, Joe Vitale, holding the guitar, was being a puppet – and my strings were being pulled. That song, “Ghost Train,” is now on the CD as the first track. You can hear a sample of it if you go to www.thehealingsong.com. I swear that song is haunting. There’s a message in it about stopping war, and I don’t go around talking about war, I don’t put my focus on that. Something – either my unconscious mind or Divinity – came through and lead that song through me. I am as in awe as anybody. I’m proud because the song came through me. Yet if that song or CD wins some sort of Grammy, I’ll be embarrassed, because a part of me will go, “You know, I just received it, I didn’t really write it.” So to answer your question, I’ve had that experience and I don’t believe it’s unique to me. Ideas and inspiration come to all of us, but most people block it. They say things like, “I don’t have the time, I don’t have the experience, I don’t have the money, I don’t have the education, I don’t know where this is going, I am embarrassed by this,” or, “I’m not a singer, I’m not a writer, I’m not an author, I’m not a musician.” We dismiss it and that’s where we block the flow of creation and the flow of miracles. www.miraclescoaching.com 227 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. I invite people to realize that inspiration knocks at your door all the time, so the next time it knocks, listen, take notes, and, as soon as you can, take action. That’s how you create. Gregory: Yes, the universe demands immediacy. Can you tell us about the picture on the cover of your CD? Is that your studio with your library and guitar in the picture? Joe: Yes, it was taken in what’s called my “man cave” to some people, my studio and home office to other people, or corporate headquarters to others, depending on who’s asking. In the picture, I’m holding my healing guitar, which was made especially for me. It’s one of a kind. The fret board has the phrases, “I love you, I’m sorry, please forgive me, and thank you” on them, so I dubbed it “the healing guitar.” I play it for a lot of the tracks I do, including my instrumental CD, Aligning to Zero, which I did with my guitar teacher, Matthew Dixon. I used it for all but one song, #6, on that particular CD. Gregory: That’s an awesome album. Joe: Yes, it’s very popular and people love it. www.miraclescoaching.com 228 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. If anyone wants to check it out, it’s available at www.aligningtozero.info. Gregory: Once you find a great technique that works for you, such as Ho’oponopono, EFT, or something else, is there any benefit to continuing to search? In other words, why do people keep searching when they have found the one? Is it boredom, ego, are they just looking for something in addition? Is there a way to maintain trust in the thing that’s working for them? Joe: The simple answer is that life continues to grow and we continue to learn. We’re always discovering something new. We’ve not come to a full stop and I don’t know that we ever will. I’m not even sure that when we die it’s a full stop with nothing else to happen. For example, I discovered Ho’oponopono, and promote and tell the world about it. Have I stopped? No, absolutely not. I’m still looking for other techniques. In fact, I found another healer I’ve worked with a couple of times and I’m going to bring him to Austin so I can work with him in person. He appears to help people burn off their karma, although I don’t know how to describe his technique because I’ve never seen it in person. If this is true and it works, I’m going to bring a small group of people together, close friends of mine, to experience it with me. Then, if we all agree that this is something phenomenal, I’ll put it in my bag of tricks – my toolkit, so to speak. www.miraclescoaching.com 229 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. So should I stop because I’ve discovered Ho’oponopono? No. Should I continue using Ho’oponopono? Yes. Will I discover something that is as good, or maybe even better? Well, that’s why the quest is there. Yes, it’s very possible because the fat lady hasn’t sung, as they say in opera, and the show is not over. We continue to learn, explore, and discover – and I absolutely love the quest. I love seeking new ways to create miracles and new ways to help people, so it behooves me to keep learning. When I find a new healing technique or method that can actually make profound changes quickly, I pass it on to everybody in Miracles Coaching™ because I don’t want people to take the slow route. I’m always looking for the fast track. Curiosity is probably leading the way, but I can’t help but suspect that the Divine itself, God if you will, is leading us, through us, to find all these different ways. Life’s a glorious adventure! We’re not done. Gregory: My experience, especially as a coach, has been that we learn things as we can handle them. We’ll learn something that we can accept, use it, and then, as we develop faith and trust, we’re ready to take another step. Joe: Yes, you get them as you’re ready for them. If I had learned about Ho’oponopono 20 or 30 years ago, I wouldn’t have been ready to hear it. I would have ridiculed and dismissed it. In fact, the original EST training, which was wildly popular back in the 70s and 80s, came out when I was in college. It was all over the news, celebrities were using it, and it was the www.miraclescoaching.com 230 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. first big self-help seminar. As such, it was very controversial. I could have been open to it, but I was not. I was not ready. Today, some of my friends are the founders and promoters of EST, who’ve gone on to do spinoffs from it, and now, of course, I’m fascinated by it. In many ways I miss that I could have done it when it was new and out there, but I wasn’t ready. That’s the bottom line. Gregory: Can you expound on level 5 of the Awakening? Have you had any new insights or experience? Joe: That’s a wonderful question. I talk about different levels of awakening in both “The Abundance Paradigm” and “The Awakening Course” programs, and also in The Awakening Course book itself. Most people out in the world act like victims. It’s not really a stage of awakening, but it’s a stage. If we’re lucky, we go into empowerment, which is the second stage. Movies like “The Secret” and books like mine help people to get into that second stage. The third stage is surrender, and that’s when you discover something like Ho’oponopono. You have to be ready for all these different stages because if you learn about Ho’oponopono when you’re in the first stage feeling like a victim, you aren’t going to hear it. You’re going to make fun of it, ignore it, and be repulsed by it, maybe even angered by it. www.miraclescoaching.com 231 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Often in life we come up against something that we can’t explain. Sometimes it’s an illness, accident, or death, and we realize we aren’t as empowered as we thought. We seem to have limits, and that’s when we start to surrender to a higher power, to God, to the Divine. That’s the third stage. The fourth stage I call the awakening, or enlightenment, and while I don’t know any way to make that happen, I know you can prepare for it. You can do it a number of ways: being in Miracles Coaching™, doing work on your beliefs to find limiting beliefs and releasing them, and meditating. Meditation and gratitude, or any of the tools, help quiet you, allowing you to be more sensitive and in tune with God or the Divine. And, as we talked about earlier, it can also help you feel more at one with nature. All these prepare you to actually have the experience of the fourth stage – awakening or enlightenment. Some people go on into the fifth stage where you become the walking enlightened, which I’m still learning about. I’m not in that stage, although I have had glimpses of it during a satori – an experience where your awareness pops for a moment and you see the totality of all of life. You experience that awakening moment of enlightenment. I have no way to trigger that with the knowledge and experience I have right now, or know how to make it a permanent awareness. All I know is how to prepare for it. Gregory: How do you approach overcoming guilt and forgiveness of self for past errors and mistakes? www.miraclescoaching.com 232 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Joe: I think Wayne Dyer said that if there’s any lack of joy, wealth, and prosperity in your life, it’s because of a lack of self-forgiveness. Forgiving yourself for anything that has already been done in the past and releasing the guilt will unleash all the positive energy that’s within you. It allows you to create, attract, and manifest the miracles you’re longing for. It’s that important. In many ways, and in many cultures, they believe that forgiving yourself is the only thing you really have to do because, once you’ve done this, you open yourself to the miracles. The real punch line is no one’s punishing you. There is no Divine being saying, “You’re under my thumb because you’ve done something in the past so I’m punishing you.” Nobody is doing that to you but you, so you have to ask yourself, “Okay, can I stop punishing myself now?” When you say yes and feel the pressure taken off your chest, or the monkey off your back, you are free. But you have to do it, it’s an inside job. Talking to your Miracles Coach, reflecting on forgiveness, love, and appreciation of yourself, these are all tools to help you forgive yourself. There’s no reason not to love, appreciate, reward, release, and completely set yourself free from guilt and punishment – it’s all psychological. It’s over, the past is over. It’s done. You can’t change it, but you can release it. You can reframe it in many ways and have an experience that you changed it. The point is to be able to say, “It’s over, I did what I did when I did it because that was the level of consciousness I had. I wasn’t at a higher level of www.miraclescoaching.com 233 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. consciousness, or an expanded level of consciousness. I am now loving, appreciating, and freeing myself.” You deserve to be free because you deserve miracles. Let go of the guilt, let go of the past, forgive yourself, and move forward. Gregory: Thank you, Joe. It’s always such a pleasure to visit with you. Joe: Thank you, Gregory, for doing this. God speed to everyone. Expect miracles. www.miraclescoaching.com 234 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Secret Session #12 Joe Vitale with Janeen Detrick Janeen: It’s a privilege to have you here, Joe. Joe: Thank you, Janeen. I know you feel gratitude all the time, and I’d love to have you do a short gratitude meditation so that we’re all cleaned, clear, centered, happy, loving, loveable – and present in this moment. Janeen: I’m delighted to do that for everyone. Begin this Gratitude Moment Anchoring meditation by closing your eyes right now wherever you are sitting. Take a deep breath in through your nose, and on the exhale say, “Thank you, thank you, thank you.” Inhale again, and allow your shoulders to sink down into your chair a little deeper, allowing the energy to flow into your heart. Feel the gratitude of the words, “Thank you, thank you, thank you,” as you think them. Choose something in your immediate surroundings and offer gratitude for it, exhausting it with every ounce of gratitude you can find for that particular object. The object is what anchors you to this moment and helps you be here now. www.miraclescoaching.com 235 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. The object I choose right now is a wool throw I’m sitting on. I sit on a wool throw because it grounds me and brings me into balance. That’s healthy for me and good for balancing my energies. As I go through this meditation, I am offering gratitude and appreciation for this wool throw on my office chair. Thank you, wool blanket, for being in my life. Thank you for letting me rub you between my fingers and feel your soft fibers. It feels good to my touch and is grounding for me. I appreciate you, little blanket. Thank you to the person who added their energy to this blanket that grounds me so lovingly every day, as it allows me to sit upon it in my office chair. Thank you weaver, whoever you are and wherever you are in this world. Maybe you are in India, maybe you are in Pakistan. I don’t know where you are, but wherever you are, thank you for lovingly weaving this wool throw so that I could have it here with me now. Thank you for the attention to detail that you lovingly wove through this throw, the beautiful black, red, green and orange threads, and that gorgeous indigo. Thank you that you chose the colors of the chakra system so that I can feel the energies flowing through my chakra system, throughout my entire body, every time I touch this little blanket. Thank you to the sheep. Oh, how I appreciate your part in the cycle of life and the energy that you have added to the cycle of life, wonderful little sheep friend, wherever you are, wherever you graze. Thank you for adding your energy and growing this beautiful wool for me, so that I could enjoy it today. I feel anchored, grounded, and connected to the earth. I appreciate you, wonderful sheep. www.miraclescoaching.com 236 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Thank you to the farmer who lovingly cares for you. May you be blessed and feel this appreciation being sent to you right now, wherever you are, however long ago you were part of feeding the sheep that made this wool fiber for my little blanket. I hope that you are feeling the gratitude, and that energy is flowing through you in a new and abundant way, just like I feel it, as I think about you and this little wool blanket. Thank you wool blanket for reminding me how we are all connected. Thank you, thank you, thank you. It is done. Joe: That was beautiful, thank you for doing that. Janeen: I’m honored to do it. Let’s begin with something that happened recently – the 11th anniversary of the September 11th trauma. How can we understand disasters? Did all of those people attract that stuff? I’ve even had students ask me, “Did God do it to them?” Joe: That’s a big question, and I tend to view it from a higher perception of circumstances. When we see accidents and disasters so big they’re hard to comprehend, with multitudes of people injured or lost, and we look at it face to face, it’s overwhelming. It doesn’t make sense. It hurts. We feel the pain and confusion. www.miraclescoaching.com 237 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. On the human level of looking at it, I can relate to how confusing it is. I can remember that moment of 9/11, as I’m sure everyone else does, too. But when you look from a higher perspective, you start to wonder, “Hey, what could be going on?” The way I look at things, we all have unconscious programs going on. In Zero Limits, Dr. Hew Len and I talk about how our unconscious mind is full of beliefs and programming we’re not aware of – what he calls data. Some experts suggest we’re aware of less than 10% of what’s actually going on, which means that the vast majority of our actions, behaviors, and what we see in the world is all bubbling up from a very murky unconscious. This is our unconscious, our collective unconscious, if you will. It’s our personal unconscious and all of its programs acting out, and, in this sense, those people – and all the rest of us – attracted these events. We can’t blame ourselves and we can’t blame them. It has nothing to do with blame or feeling guilty, but it is about awakening. That’s the whole point of my work these days, and Miracles Coaching™ is for us to awaken to what has been unconsciously driving us. The reason that we don’t get everything we want is that, in our unconscious mind, we have beliefs, or data, which says we don’t really want it. We’re keeping it away from ourselves in order to keep us safe for some reason that makes sense in the unconscious mind. It’s the same way on the outside with all of these events. There may be a higher level other than that reason going on. I don’t have a direct connection to know what that is, but in order for me to make sense of events like this, I can look at it and say, “This is an example that we’re not clear.” www.miraclescoaching.com 238 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. We have darkness within ourselves. Collectively, we attract other people with the same kind of darkness, and we can collectively attract an event out of that darkness. This is why it’s so important to work on ourselves, clean and clear all the programming, negativity, and limiting beliefs, data we’re not aware of. There are many ways to do this and Miracles Coaching™ is one of them. The fundamental essence of this coaching is to take care of those inner beliefs. In Zero Limits, I wrote about Ho’oponopono, and everyday I am reminded of how powerful and simple it is, using just these four phrases, referred to as “cleaning”: I love you I’m sorry Please forgive me Thank you If we really want to make a difference in our lives, as well as the lives of others, we’ve got to work on ourselves inside. The more we do, the more we clean and clear, then the more we can reduce those things that take place in the world, those things we read about in the newspaper and feel squeamish about. So, yes, in human terms these are disasters, but I see them also as a wake-up call. The waking up has to come from you and me, and I view it as a very personal thing. We have to look within to find what in us might be contributing to these outer events because, on another level, they’re not really” outer.” They’re projections of what’s going on in us. www.miraclescoaching.com 239 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. We’re the ones attracting these things and we’re the ones to do something about it. I know this is a huge thing to comprehend, so meditate on it, ask for guidance, pray over it, and talk to your coach about it. Do whatever it takes to understand it. Clearly, being upset about these events won’t help you, but being awakened because of them will – and I think that’s the real point. Janeen: If we eliminate our own darkness – inside – by doing the cleaning and the clearing, we reduce the projections of the collective consciousness that creates disasters of this kind. Joe: That’s exactly right, and you said it more simply and directly than me. Everything we see on the outside is a mirror reflection of what’s inside of us, which is hard to accept. It’s easier to say, “That wasn’t me, that was a terrorist, or that was the bad guy or bad woman” or whoever you want to blame it on. However, if you own that you might unconsciously – and, again, I stress unconsciously because nobody is consciously doing this – have beliefs and data as an operating system in your brain or in your mind, then you start to realize that you can do something about it. That’s when you start doing the cleaning, clearing, and coaching to lighten what’s in you, to brighten what you are seeing on the outside. Janeen: www.miraclescoaching.com 240 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. I love the realization that we have all created it together. It eliminates the blame and victimhood. Joe: It really does. I saw the ending of a movie with Robert Redford recently where someone was mauled by a bear. People captured it and put the bear in a cage. Some wanted to kill it, but the person who was mauled recovered, and during his healing, he did a lot of meditating. He told his friend, “I want you to release the bear. I want you to let him go. The bear was simply being a bear. He didn’t do anything evil or wrong.” In fact, the bear had misjudged this fellow. He thought the man was going to take his food, so the bear naturally did what he was inclined to do – he protected himself and hit the person. It was all about forgiveness, letting go of the perception of the bear. In effect, the person said, “No, the bear is not bad.” They ended up letting the bear go, freeing him out of total love and peace. I think that’s what these outside events are – reminders to look inside ourselves and find inner peace, even when it looks like, “Here’s a great opportunity to be unhappy.” Janeen: That helps us create collective peace. You’ve said before that everything is energy, and sometimes people have a hard time getting their head around that principle. Can you explain why things look solid? www.miraclescoaching.com 241 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Have you written a book on this topic – or know a resource for learning more? Joe: I haven’t written a book about it because that’s more in the realm of science, whether it’s quantum physics or just plain physics. There are plenty of books on the subject, though, including one called Quantum Physics for Dummies, so we can start at whatever level we want. What’s exciting is that, somehow, our brain is a part of all this. There are new sciences that study how the brain works, and their studies have shown that our eyes don’t see everything around us – and the brain will actually fill in missing information. You might say it plays tricks on us by filling in the gaps in the universe. In other words, there’s a lot more going on in the universe than we actually perceive. For example, when I’m looking at my giant roll-top desk and touching it, it feels pretty darn hard to me. If I hit it with my head or leg, it’s going to hurt. But it’s my understanding that this looks hard because the molecular structure is moving so slowly. If it actually sped up it would almost disappear. Everything is made up of energy – your whole body, the car you drive – all moving at various speeds, and depending on the speed, it’s going to appear hard. Even emotion is energy. Janeen: The fact that our emotions are energy probably has something to do with why we’re so often challenged in relationships and attracting love. www.miraclescoaching.com 242 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. One of my students asked for ideas because his wife left him a few years ago and he wants to be in love again. He said his friends encourage him to join dating sites, but he doesn’t want to. He thinks that’s an artificial way to meet. What if someone has been Nevillizing about attracting the love of their life, but it hasn’t shown up yet? Joe: Several things come to mind. First, you have to be at peace with the person who has left you, in this case, his wife, because as long as you feel a grudge or resentment, or even a fear that it could happen again, you’re going to push love away. I have a sneaking suspicion that’s what’s happening here because his friends are telling him to join a dating site and he’s dismissing it. It could be they’re getting a signal from the universe that, “Here’s a way to go find your special person.” There’s nothing wrong with dating sites. I found Nerissa on a dating site, the person I have been with for the last 13 years, and I know many people who have found their partners on dating sites. I even know people who run dating sites and their success record has been astonishing. There’s nothing artificial about it, although you can make it artificial by lying and doing all kinds of crazy things to not have it work the way you want it to work. It sounds like a belief issue – saying that dating sites are artificial is a belief. It is not a fact because we can’t all say it’s artificial and we can’t all prove it. That makes it somebody’s opinion, or belief. Why would a person believe that? Well, it would keep them from finding the love of their life. Why would they not want to find the love of their life? Because www.miraclescoaching.com 243 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. they’ve been wounded and don’t want to be hurt again. This is how our mental processes work, and why it’s important to be in Miracles Coaching™ where you have somebody to hear you. They can feed back to you what you may not realize you’re saying – let alone believing. In this case, I would tell that person, “Look, there’s nothing wrong with dating sites, but before you join one make peace with your ex-wife or the person that left you. Make sure that you can love that person even though they left you. Make sure you can love yourself even though somebody left you. Make sure that you’re in love with yourself and life right now because as soon as you start to fall in love with yourself right now, other people will sense it.” If you do this, you’ll be sending out a beacon of energy, and your perfect love has got to pick up on it. They may or may not come through a dating site. They might just show up giving out brochures at your house one day. The point is, and this is the essence to almost every question I ever hear, is that it’s not about whether it’s right or wrong to do a particular action. What’s important is that you’re clear with the past and clear about what you want in the future, and you’re at peace in this moment. When you clear the past and are at peace with this moment, and you know where you would love to go in the future, you’re now in alignment for things to work out. So in a case like this, I would strongly recommend this person look at the past, that old story of the person who left them, make peace with it, and fall in love right now. Janeen: www.miraclescoaching.com 244 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. That’s beautiful. I can’t wait to see you write a book on relationships. Joe: I’m actually working on an audio program with someone who’s very famous in the relationship arena, and we’ll be releasing it soon. Janeen: There’ll be great demand for that. What about gay relationships? One of my students said he’s been in one for 20 years and still feels badly around his parents. Apparently, even though they’re nice about it, his parents still think they shouldn’t be married, only friends. He said, “It’s now affecting my health. My first and second chakras often cause me problems. I don’t know how to gain a new perspective and forgive the world for being so small minded. I’ve been doing Ho’oponopono for three years, but I need something else, like a paradigm shift.” Joe: I admire this person for asking this – 20 years is a long time to be in any sort of relationship, and that’s wonderful. In Ho’oponopono, Dr. Hew Len says it is working even when you haven’t yet seen the result that you’re demanding from the universe. Even though you’re cleaning and it’s being erased, there can be so much belief and unconscious programming, or what he calls data, that it can take longer than a three year period. www.miraclescoaching.com 245 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. It’s like trying to clean Donald Trump’s mansion. You’re not done in a few hours. There’s so much cleaning to do it’s going to take longer. You don’t just do it in the evening and then, by the time you go to bed, everything is resolved. This is not that kind of methodology – it’s not superficial. We’re going deeper than that. We’re looking for the miracle, a deep transformation, and that might take longer. When you do Ho’oponopono, things are cleaning and clearing. Just trust the process. It’s so easy that no one should think anything about continuing to do it anyway. Our part is simply, “I love you, I’m sorry, please forgive me, thank you.” It’s about your connection to the Divine as you’re considering whatever it is you’re feeling. Another thing to notice is this person’s reference to “the world of small minded people,” but there aren’t any small minded people out there. The world isn’t small minded, the person thinking it is small minded. The dilemma isn’t, “How I can change my entire family?” but rather, “How do I just change myself?” It’s not about looking at the world and saying, “I would be so much happier and loving, and life would be so much breezier, if my family changed.” That’s not how this works. All you have to do is look in the mirror and fall in love with yourself – no matter what the rest of the world says. You fall in love with yourself and say, “I’ve been in a 20-year relationship and that’s a marriage in any culture. It’s not just a friendship – it’s way beyond that.” You don’t have to convince anybody else. No one is holding court. You don’t need a judge and an attorney to represent you. It’s something you tell www.miraclescoaching.com 246 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. yourself, “I am in a long-term relationship that’s both friendship and marriage.” You don’t have to tell anybody else that – you’re the only one that has to know it. It’s your own belief system that’s creating the filter so that, when you look out, it looks like you’re seeing small-minded-beliefs people with these systems. In reality it’s your own belief in your own head. It’s your own small minded perception. Janeen: It sounds like this person is attracting judgment from his parents – and what’s he doing when he says that the world is small minded? Judging. When you judge somebody else, that’s what you get back. Joe: When somebody says the world is judging them, what they’re actually doing is judging the world. The problem is they don’t usually hear it unless someone like a Miracles Coach points it out and says, “The only way you can be judged by people is if you’re doing it.” That’s the wake-up call, and where the real work is – within. Celebrate 20 years, celebrate your marriage, celebrate your friends, celebrate your love, and celebrate a family that has been there for you all this time. Janeen: So it’s about looking at what there is to appreciate and have gratitude for, instead of looking for what isn’t. www.miraclescoaching.com 247 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Joe: Gratitude answers everything. If you sit in gratitude first and look for what you can appreciate in what you’re tempted to complain about, you probably wouldn’t even have a question. It will dissolve in love, coming from that source of gratitude which is there waiting for us to discover it right now. Janeen: Can you comment on clearing “emotional junk?” I had one student suggest that, while there seems to be all kinds of inspired methods, the only reason any of them work is that the person is making a choice to do something other than think a negative thought. Joe: That’s not how all systems work. Even with Ho’oponopono, you’re not asked to change your thought. You’re asked to say, “I love you, I’m sorry, please forgive me, thank you” to whatever the thought or feeling is. It’s not an issue of changing a thought. Changing thoughts is wonderful. I definitely prefer having positive thoughts over negative thoughts. I like to do the “what if up” game and think things like, “What if it all works out?” It beats the “what if down” game where you’re constantly thinking, “What if it doesn’t work out?” I always prefer to have a choice about a thought, but not all the clearing techniques focus on that. For example, I talk about the emotional freedom technique (EFT) in the movie, The Tapping Solution. When you do EFT, you take whatever comes up for www.miraclescoaching.com 248 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. you – a negative thought, a limiting belief, or a feeling in your body – and you tap it away. You’re not consciously changing a thought. So while the person is partly correct, because many methods do involve that, it’s not a sweeping or correct analysis of all clearing and cleaning techniques. The larger question is probably, “Why are they even asking? Why does it even matter?” I say do whatever works for you because there are a bundle of techniques – and more coming. Just say thank you. I know I can use all the magic I can get. I want all of the different transformational tools, and, when I find one, I’m still open to something else. I often use EFT – and Ho’oponopono non-stop. We need anything that works at shifting the unconscious programming. Pick one and do it. Janeen: Is there a good way to release guilt and embarrassment surrounding things you’ve done in the past? For example, one student said, “A part of me wants to fall in love, and a part of me doesn’t, because I don’t want to have to disclose how many times I’ve been married, or how many times I’ve filed bankruptcy, because of my stupid choices and my desire for instant money. I believe the anxiousness about money has now subsided so I don’t need money anymore in order to be happy, but this anxiety about telling a prospective love is so embarrassing.” Is there a way for them to stop feeling scared of rejection or being laughed at? Joe: www.miraclescoaching.com 249 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. I admire this person for stepping up and being so open about their past and their heart and their question. It takes a lot of courage to do that. My answer is, “Change your story.” I don’t mean change the facts or lie about the facts, but rather, change your story about the facts. Right now that person is saying, “I’m embarrassed that I’ve been married so many times, and I refuse to fall in love because of it.” This isn’t positive, nurturing, or loving to you. You need to take care of you. Get to the place where you can be in love, you can love yourself, and you can welcome love in your heart and in your life again. You deserve it. This is all true. If the stumbling block is looking at your past and saying, “I was married 12 times,” and you feel embarrassed to say it, reframe it. Right now you’re saying it’s bad. Your story is that you’re a failure because you tried 12 times, or 7 times, or whatever it was, and it didn’t work. Just change it and have fun with it. For example, you could say, “I was married 12 times and you know what that means? I’m great at beginning relationships! What I’ve learned is that I’m going to begin this relationship and the new me is going to complete the relationship.” The point is for you to make up your own empowering story, the story that owns your past in a positive way. Here’s another example from something that happened years ago when I was in a movie. The filmmaker had lost his left arm in a mountain climbing accident and, at first, he didn’t talk about it. I felt really uncomfortable because I didn’t know how to act, and I was also dealing with the adrenaline rush of being filmed. One day he started to talk about his arm, saying he had lost it in a mountain climbing accident and was embarrassed about it. Then he said, “But, I have my right arm and you know what that means? I’m always right.” And he continued to www.miraclescoaching.com 250 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. make these jokes, turning what could have been a negative limitation, uncomfortable and embarrassing, into something that we joined hearts over. What a positive way to look at what happened. I’m sure he was unhappy and wrestled with it. He probably had to go through a dark night of the soul and come out the other side, but he did, and now he owns it. He’s saying, “Yes, I lost my arm. I was clumsy and I fell. Okay, well, now I’m always right because I’ve got my right arm.” The story we tell ourselves about the past can limit us or empower us. Most of us tell it in a negative way. We say, “I did such and such and wasn’t that dumb? I’m a dumb person so I’m not going to take any chances anymore because I might screw up again.” Instead, why not say, “I’ve made some mistakes before but I learned from them. I was married a few times and now I know the ins and outs of marriage, so I’m not getting married until I know for sure this one’s going to work.” Change your story, not the facts. You’re not lying, you’re not fibbing. You’re changing your story and reframing it in a positive way – have fun with it. As soon as you do, you’ll have people saying, “Yes, I want that person because they’ve been around the block and knows what marriage is all about. If I’m getting married, I’m going with that person. I don’t want to go with someone who’s never been married because I don’t know what I’m getting into. This person does.” The same concept applies to someone who has filed bankruptcy more than once because of stupid choices. www.miraclescoaching.com 251 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. Janeen: The first thing that crosses my mind is to reframe it as, “There’s no such thing as failure. Look what I learned every time.” Joe: Yes, I filed bankruptcy decades ago in Houston. In the beginning I was embarrassed, until I realized it solved a lot of problems. It was one of the smartest things I ever did because, once I told the bill collectors I’d filed bankruptcy, they said, “Okay, thanks, have a great day,” and quit bothering me. It was like magic. I’m not encouraging bankruptcy. I’m saying that, whether it’s a marriage, bankruptcy, accident, or something else, anything in your past can be reframed in a positive light. Janeen: I tell people who have negative energy towards themselves and are freaking out that bankruptcy is rooted in the Old Testament, in the Judeo-Christian ethic. They called it the Year of Jubilee and it happened every seventh year. So if you think of that Old Testament God as being God, then really, God’s the one who instituted bankruptcy, that’s where it started. Every seventh year all debts were forgiven and everyone had a clean slate – so the year of Jubilee, throw a party! This idea can teach us a whole new level of forgiveness, because the principle being taught in the Old Testament is that, once you let go of thinking www.miraclescoaching.com 252 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. someone owes you something, energetically you posture the universe to be your debtor, and the universe gives back from many sources. Joe: That’s right. Janeen: Speaking of letting go, how would someone set goals but also be detached from them? In other words, if I’m supposed to hold them in my awareness so I can Nevillize them, how do I simultaneously detach? It seems incongruent. Joe: It does seem that way, but the answer is how you perceive things – the same answer I give when I’m asked, “How do I let go and take inspired action?” Letting go is a psychological state. When you’re dependent, addicted, or attached to particular results, you’re not letting go. Letting go means it’s okay if you get the results and okay if you don’t. There’s a mental juggling act going on. For example, say your goal is to write a report for a class by Friday, and you’re taking action toward it. At the same time, you have to be okay that if something surfaces and you get the report done on Thursday, before Friday, that’s okay, and if you get the report done on Saturday, that’s okay. You have to be okay. There’s a spirit of trust involved here, and you treat goals as sign posts down the road. We look down the road and say things like, “I want to have this house, I want to have this relationship, I want to create this music CD, I want to write this book, I want to open this business, I want to increase sales.” www.miraclescoaching.com 253 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. All of these are sign posts down the road, things you’d like to achieve as you’re driving through life – but don’t forget to smell the roses right now. Look to the left, look to the right, see the wonderful structures here. As you move towards these different goals, you might see a sign ahead that says “Better book ahead, turn right,” or “Better business ahead, turn left.” Be flexible, that’s the key word here. Be flexible in going for any goal by ending it with the phrase, “This or something better.” It’s a loophole that allows you to change your goal for something better as you move towards it. You may not know what the better goal is until you start taking action – now – towards the goal that you said you want. It’s all play, a game. People often put too much stress on goals and achievement – the old type-A heart attack way of “I’m going to do this no matter what.” They end up sacrificing their health, family, friends, and marriage in the name of the almighty goal. That’s not right – having a goal is an energy generator. For example, I currently have four CDs on the market. At a recent music session, my producer and I started talking about making another one. When we first met, I didn’t have the goal for another CD, but, as we started talking, I thought, “I do have more songs in me and really love this. I could do another CD in a few months.” Suddenly this energy bubbled up and I got excited because I threw a goal out there. As I move toward that goal – by taking action – it may change. I may decide it isn’t going to be an album, it’s going to be a three-act play, or a musical book, I don’t know. The point is I’m not married to it in any negative way. I have fun with it, while being open to changing it. That’s the letting go part. www.miraclescoaching.com 254 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. In the process of taking action, something better, more inspired, and refined might come to me that could surprise or delight me – or feel like a miracle. So yes, let go and take action, but don’t be attached or addicted to it. Your survival doesn’t depend on that goal. Have fun, be in this moment, enjoy what’s going on, go for your goals, and open yourself to something better showing up. Janeen: That’s beautiful, especially the part about not being so fixated on the goal that you forget to be flexible with it, or allow it to morph into something else if you feel so inspired. A lot of students think that if they allow it to turn into something different, it means they’re quitting on their goal, but redirecting is not the same as quitting. Joe: If I’m going to Dallas because I want to go to a particular Indian restaurant in town, and on the drive hear there’s a new one that just opened up in Waco, I’m not quitting if I turn and go to the Waco restaurant. I’m still going, but something better showed up. For example, Waco could be closer and easier to get to than my original goal. That’s why the phrase, “This or something better,” is so important. It’s not quitting the goal – it’s paying attention to what might be better than the goal, which is a new goal. Janeen: www.miraclescoaching.com 255 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. That feels light and wonderful, and a great way to set goals. Joe: It’s a great way to go through life, and that takes us back to feeling gratitude right now. Feel gratitude and inspiration for what to do, and out of that place take action. This will lead to more to be grateful for, more action to take, and new discoveries along the way. That’s the process of miracles. Janeen: Joe, thank you so much for sharing all this. Joe: Thank you, Janeen. I love and appreciate you. God speed everybody. www.miraclescoaching.com 256 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. About the Author Dr. Joe Vitale is the author of way too many bestselling books to mention here. Some of them include The Attractor Factor, Life's Missing Instruction Manual, The Key, Zero Limits Attract Money Now and his most recent release to date, Faith. Dr. Vitale also has two new books set to be released in 2013. He's also recorded many Nightingale-Conant audio programs, to name a few, “The Awakening Course,” “The Missing Secret,” “The Secret to Attracting Money,” "The Abundance Paradigm" and his latest, "The Ultimate Law of Attraction Library." Joe has also been in several movies, including the blockbuster “The Secret.” He's been on the following TV shows: Larry King Live, Donny Deutsch's "The Big Idea," CNN, CNBC, CBS, ABC, Fox News: "Fox & Friends" and Extra TV. He's also been featured in The New York Times and Newsweek. His latest accomplishment includes being the world's first self-help singersongwriter as seen in 2012's Rolling Stone® magazine. In 2012 alone, he has released four music CDs with his fifth album just released in 2013! He created a Miracles Coaching™ program and helps people achieve their dreams by understanding the deeper aspects of the law of attraction and the law of right action. This man was once homeless but today is a bestselling author who believes in magic and miracles. For more information on Joe Vitale, go to: www.mrfire.com To contact the author of this book, please e-mail Suzanne@mrfire.com www.miraclescoaching.com 257 © 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc. SPECIAL MIRACLES COACHING™ OFFER! For the past 25 years I've been helping people like you attract ALL kinds of miracles in EVERY area of their lives. I've helped people attract... Money ● Cars ● Soul Mates ● Better Health New Careers ● Dream Homes The list goes on and on! And I can help you do the same in my Joe Vitale's Miracles Coaching™ Program! The key is for you to be ready. (And it looks like you are or you would not be reading this right now). If you want to learn more about how you can attract money, jobs, health, love, careers, relationships or anything else quickly, and you want to sign up now, just go to... www.miraclescoaching.com www.miraclescoaching.com 258