© 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc.
© 2013 by Hypnotic Marketing, Inc.
All rights reserved. Reproduction and distribution are forbidden. No part of this
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Table of Contents
Introduction
Secret Session #1
Secret Session #2
Secret Session #3
Secret Session #4
Secret Session #5
Secret Session #6
Secret Session #7
Secret Session #8
Secret Session #9
Secret Session #10
Secret Session #11
Secret Session #12
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Expect Miracles!
An Introduction by Dr. Joe Vitale
For more than four years now I have been answering questions from
students in my famous Miracles Coaching™ program. They've asked
everything from –
* How do I stay positive when people around me are negative?
* How do I discover my life purpose when I don't know what I want?
* How do I attract money in this terrible economy?
* How do I attract my soulmate?
* How do I improve my self-image?
* How do I help others?
* What can I do when everything looks hopeless?
Those questions – and hundreds of others – have been asked every month
for years. I often got on the secret coaching calls with no idea what I would say,
but always felt like inspiration led me in answering each question in the most
enlightening way.
We recorded all those calls, of course. And one day I realized that
people not yet in my Miracles Coaching™ program might benefit from my
answers.
Now, for the first time ever, you can have access to the first volume of
questions and answers in my brand new e-book, The Miracles Manual,
which you are now reading.
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I believe you will be entertained, educated, and enlightened from just
reading this book.
Please read, enjoy, and –
Expect Miracles!
Love,
Joe
Dr. Joe Vitale
Creator of Miracles Coaching™
Author of way too many books to list here
Member BBB 2003-1013
www.JoeVitale.com
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Secret Session #1
Joe Vitale with Kory Koontz
Kory:
Joe, welcome.
Joe:
Thank you, Kory. I’ve been looking forward to this.
Kory:
Let’s jump right in with a question you probably get all the time, “What if I
don’t know what I want?” How do you respond to this?
Joe:
One time I had coffee with Robert Anthony, who’s written a lot of
successful material over the years, and asked him the same question. He said, “I
tell them they’re lying.” So that’s exactly what I do today when people say that.
The further explanation is that we easily deceive ourselves. Self-sabotage is
rampant, but we don’t usually know it. We blame it on other people, our
upbringing, society – everybody, but ourselves. The people who say they don’t
know what they want are lying because it’s an easy way to dodge taking
responsibility and action. As soon as you say what you want, you have to do
something about it.
For example, as soon as you admit, “Well, I’ve always wanted to open that
doughnut shop. I’ve always wanted to open my own dry cleaning place. I’ve
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always wanted to write my own book. I’ve always wanted to create my own music.
I’ve always wanted to sing. I’ve always wanted to dance. I’ve always wanted to be
a lawyer,” you have to face the stark reality of what you’re going to do about it, or
why you haven’t. For most of us, it’s easy to simply skirt the issue, shrug our
shoulders, and say, “I don’t know what I want.” Essentially, it’s a cop out.
In coaching, I play little games with people and ask them to imagine
possibilities. For example, drift back to when you were a kid and ask yourself,
“What did I really like to do? What kind of play was it? What did I dream about
being when I grew up?” This starts to unearth answers.
You can play with other ideas, too, like if you won the lottery. I’m not into
gambling, so I’m not telling people to try to win it. I’m just playing with the idea
that if you suddenly had millions of dollars drop in your lap, paid all your bills and
taxes, bought all the toys – what are you going to do with your life now? It takes
away the survival excuse that people have when they say, “Well, I can’t do what I
really want because I need to pay my bills.” That’s just another excuse.
We’re deceiving ourselves when we do that because, underneath our tiny
little smokescreen, which isn’t all that thick, we do know what we want. We just
haven’t allowed ourselves the permission to admit it, because as soon as we admit
it, we’ve got to do something about it. We’ve got to go for it and stop making
excuses.
Just as I did in the movie, “The Secret,” I lean forward, get in your face, and
say, “Look, let’s be ruthlessly honest with ourselves. You know what you want.
What you need to do is admit it to yourself and, from there, we can devise a plan. It
can be a really easy, baby step of a plan to move forward and bring it into being.”
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So, begin with the reality that you do know what you want, that it’s right
under the surface of your excuses. That’s where you start.
Kory:
You wanted to learn how to play an instrument, or learn how to sing – which
you’ve done over the last couple of years. In fact, you have a recently released CD
called Blue Healer.
In order to do this, you had to overcome your own limiting beliefs in regard
to your talents. What did you do to get past the fears and “What if’s?”
Joe:
There’s something big going on with the music, but what’s important to
understand is that, before I got started, I didn’t call myself a musician. I hadn’t
written a single song, and could only play a few chords on the guitar. I’d never
sung anything, except maybe in the choir when I was growing up in grade school.
This came about because I admitted to myself that one of the things I wanted
in my life was to be a musician. I wanted to create my own music and see what I
could do with it. I admitted it, which is one of the first steps. Next I got support –
coaches for vocal, guitar, and music – and having these helped me polish my skills
fairly rapidly.
Then, last October, I ran into a famous singer/songwriter, Ray Wiley
Hubbard, who’s on the same level as Willie Nelson. He’s well-known, and knew
of me, but we hadn’t met before. We happened to be at the same restaurant, so we
sat down together. I couldn’t believe the synchronicity.
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As we got to talking, he asked, “Are you a musician?” and I remember
thinking to myself, “How do I answer that?” I thought, “Well, the reality is that I
am. I haven’t recorded a thing yet, but I’ve already committed to recording and I
am taking lessons. I’ve got my coaches lined up.” So I looked him right in the eye
and said, “Yes, sir. I am.”
Three months later, I came out with my first CD, Blue Healer, and ended up
on the cover of a local magazine. Immediately I said, “Well, now I’m going for the
big one, the one that is all me – my own singing and guitar playing.” Blue Healer
had been more of an instrumental, a relaxing background effort. While it was a
great accomplishment, I wanted to put myself on the line even more – with my
own original music, guitar playing, and singing.
By the end of the year, I’ll have three CDs out. As soon as Strut is done, I’ll
be working on another with my guitar teacher, Matthew Dixon, a Spanish guitar
player. When you admit what you want, you release all kinds of energy within you.
Then, when you hire a coach, you gain an ally to help and instruct you, as well as
someone who’ll hold you accountable. Did I have limiting beliefs or self-doubt?
Absolutely. There were times when I thought, “What in the world am I doing?”
Last February I signed up to go to a songwriting workshop that Ray Wiley
Hubbard and Kevin Weltz were putting on. It was very informal, only five or six
people for three or four days, and I almost didn’t go. Right up to that morning, I
kept thinking to myself, “What am I doing? I’m not a singer. I’m not a
songwriter.” But I looked at that and decided, “Wait a minute. This is how you
learn.”
I wrestled with some of my self-doubt on my own. I’ve been doing this for
decades, so I’ve got a bag of tricks I can pull out of at any point. But I also know
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that we all need a coach, and one of the people who acted as a coach and helped
me was Daniel Barrett, the lead singer of an Austin band called Porter Davis.
One day I was in his studio, and he asked me to sing and play this song I was
working on. I flubbed a couple lines and got as critical as someone can be of
themselves. He stopped me and said, “What just happened?” I told him, “The
Wrath of Khan just came into my brain and beat me up for what I did.” He would
not let me play past it, so I had to address it – and I couldn’t go past it until I
relaxed, accepted my efforts to learn, and was kind to myself. I realized I was
learning as we were going. I can’t be expected to sing and play like Paul
McCartney with his 60 years of experience.
So the coaching was a dramatic breakthrough. In fact, we both felt the shift
physically when it happened for me. We had to walk outside to get air, and talk
about it, now a turning point. He helped me see this block, and walked me through
an alternative way of looking at it. Once I let it go, my playing became even better
and, of course, I enjoyed it more. It was a dramatic moment.
It’s easy to self-sabotage when you don’t actually see what’s happening. We
accept it as par for the course. This is why I think coaching is fundamentally
priceless, and essential to any big thing we’re going for. We all need it on many
levels.
Kory:
I’m glad you pointed that out because, at certain points in my life, I’ve
thought, “Okay, I’ve reached a pinnacle and I’m fine now,” and then find myself
back to old habits. That’s when I seek out a coach in the office.
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I continue to be a work in progress – so I’m really glad to hear that you still
need help once in a while, too.
Joe:
Every one of us is a work in progress.
The great goal of life is to awaken, but even when you awaken, you’re still
in life. There will continue to be growth and challenges, things you may need to
deal with. When we can settle into this moment with gratitude, looking around
with appreciation, we do start to feel differently, but that doesn’t mean we’re done.
For example, I still have inspired goals coming up from the Divine through
me, and I want to act on them. I can’t sit here and say, “Well, I’ve got nothing else
to do, nothing else to learn, and nothing else to grow through.” That’s not the
human experience. The big takeaway here is to realize that, “Yes, this moment is
perfect, and yes, I still have work to do.”
Kory:
When you created Blue Healer, what did you feel was its main purpose?
What were you hoping that people would use it for, or get out it? It’s very
refreshing and relaxing.
Joe:
The main purpose is to help people clear whatever is keeping them from this
moment – a perception, stress, a limiting belief, a physical pain – any unconscious
issues that they might feel, but aren’t able to express. The goal of Blue Healer is to
relax, soothe, and heal.
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People who seem to use it the most are massage therapists, and people into
yoga or Pilates, to help their clients de-stress. I’ve even heard from people who
listen to it while they’re driving that they just breathe easier. They relax, but
remain aware and alert.
If people are interested in getting a feel for it, they can hear a 5 – 10 minute
mix sampler at the Blue Healer website, www.healingmojomusic.com.
Kory:
Speaking of reducing stress, or clearing limiting beliefs, what would you say
to someone who says, “How can I turn my husband around from being so
negative?”
Joe:
My first response is to be an inspiration to your partner. In other words, if
you’re thinking or saying out loud that your partner is negative, they’re most likely
going to react negatively to you because that’s being critical.
Nobody likes to be criticized or feel less than perfect. When you’re saying
someone’s negative, they feel and sense it, and if you’re talking out loud, they may
be hearing it. My best advice is, “Don’t try to change anybody. Instead, work on
you and be an inspiration to the people around you.”
If you do that, it won’t be long before your husband will start saying, “I
wonder what she’s doing. She seems to be happy all the time and getting
healthier.” Or, “She seems to be getting more of the results that she was going for.”
Eventually, he’ll ask, “What exactly is happening here? What are you reading?
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What are you doing? What are you popping? Who are you talking to?” He’ll get
curious.
Also, look at why you think he’s negative. People do the best they can based
on their upbringing and beliefs, and what he needs from you is love and total
acceptance. So don’t try to change anybody – change yourself. This ties into the
Hawaiian healing process of Ho’oponopono, from my book, Zero Limits, which
says there’s nobody, nothing, outside of you. What you perceive is your reflection.
When you look at your husband and say, “He’s negative,” you’re saying that
a part of you is negative. For most people, when they first hear this, it doesn’t
make sense. They wrestle with it and don’t like it, because it means they have to
take responsibility for what they see in somebody else.
Dr. Hew Len, my co-author and the man who taught me Ho’oponopono, has
this great line, “Have you ever noticed whenever there’s a problem, you’re always
there?” He’s pointing out that, not only are you part of the problem, you attracted it
– because it’s actually you, and coming from you.
The world is a mirror, reflecting what you believe about the world itself. If
you look out and see your husband being negative, you’ve got to take that in and
go, “Some part of me is being negative. I’m projecting it into the world and it’s
being reflected back to me through my husband.” This is the deeper healing – it’s
not about healing him. That’s like trying to put your makeup on by looking in the
mirror, but putting the makeup on the mirror. That’s not going to help you. You
have to look at yourself, and question your beliefs. This is when a Miracles Coach
can make a difference.
You can also clean and clear it by saying the phrases, “I love you. I’m sorry.
Please forgive me. Thank you.” You’re not saying them to your husband. You say
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it inside yourself to your connection with all that is – some call God, or the Divine.
You’re saying to God, “Please erase this program within me,” not, “erase it in my
husband.”
This is how Dr. Hew Len helped heal an entire ward of mentally ill criminals
in Hawaii, where he worked for four years. He didn’t try to change the patients
because their therapists had already tried that and it didn’t work. At that point, the
patients were being sedated and shackled. Nothing was working.
As a last resort, the hospital brought in this unusual therapist and said, “Do
whatever you want because nothing else is working.” So he did Ho’oponopono.
He’d look at the patients, or their files, and feel whatever emotion came up –
repulsion, anger, shame. He didn’t try to change the patient, only the feeling that
was keeping him from the clarity of the moment. He repeated the four phrases
internally, “I love you. I’m sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you,” saying them over
and over, in any order. As he kept doing that, the patients started to get better.
So we’re not trying to heal a husband. What we’re trying to do is clear up a
program, a negative belief, in the person who perceives it in the other.
Kory:
Sometimes that’s a hard pill to swallow, although you’ve also said we’re not
to blame for it. Yes, we attracted it, but it’s not good or bad.
Joe:
That’s important because when people react, they’re usually reacting to the
idea of total responsibility. And most of us don’t want that.
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It’s so much easier to point to other people and say, “No, it’s my husband’s
fault. It’s not me.” But the thing to realize is that this is not about guilt, blame, or
shame – it’s about personal empowerment and awakening. When you take back
your power and say, “Okay, the world is of my making, and what I’m seeing here
is actually a clue to what I believe,” you can get a handle on changing it.
This is where coaching can help, because you have somebody outside of
your brain, outside of your mental belief system, to help you see what you’re
believing in the moment. If somebody’s attracting things they don’t necessarily
care for, they don’t need to beat themselves up – they just need to become aware of
the belief that’s attracting what they don’t care for. Change the belief and you get a
different result.
Kory:
That’s a perfect segue to my next question.
Can you talk about the idea, or technique, of diving into your feelings?
Joe:
When we bury a feeling, we bury it alive – meaning that if people don’t
express, investigate, or release a feeling, it gets submerged in our body/mind
system, what some people will call our unconscious mind.
This is okay as a temporary measure. We’ll get through the day, but the bad
news is that it usually resurfaces, and sometimes in an inappropriate way, for
example, when somebody blows up. They lose it and start screaming at their
partner, their kids, or somebody at work. And it’s because that emotion was
suppressed. Whatever you’re feeling is totally fine. We’re human and we have
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feelings. But rather than dismiss any of them, we want to learn from them. Feelings
can be an entryway into a belief system that actually needs to be changed.
For example, if you repeatedly have road rage and are easily upset, you
don’t want to deny, or suppress, the feeling. Instead, ask yourself, “Where did that
feeling come from?” because underneath the feelings are beliefs which trigger the
emotions. You become aware of it by stopping and taking the time to figure out
what it is. It could be anything, such as “I deserved my right of way,” or “This
always happens to me. They always cut me off. They always do these negative
things.”
Thoughts like this cause you to have outbursts – but notice that the outburst
doesn’t happen in isolation. It happens because something triggers it, often from a
previous experience years before, like the first time you learned to drive. For
example, when I started driving, I was stiff, extremely cautious, and gripped the
steering wheel like it was going to run off. If you’re like that and suddenly another
driver pulls out in front of you, you have to do something to express the emotion.
Otherwise, in that moment you can lock onto it – and continue to recreate it
throughout the rest of your driving career.
So for the next 60 years, whenever somebody pulls out in front of you, you
relive that first moment. But you won’t know this unless you pause, express the
feeling, look for the trigger and any underlying belief – maybe back to the first
cause. When you do that, you can release it forever.
Kory:
It’s like a metaphor of taking a deep dive in the pool, “Let’s go down to the
bottom and see where that originally comes from.”
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Joe:
Some people get nervous, thinking, “Oh, I’m going into the deep, dark
molasses, the quicksand of my mind,” but it’s not like that at all, especially if you
work with your Miracles Coach. In fact, thinking the unconscious is scary is just
another belief.
It’s not dark. It’s not quirky. It’s not scary. It’s just below the surface and
you can look at it by calling it forth.
Kory:
You don’t have to relive it – just acknowledge it.
Joe:
Even if you did relive the memories, you’re doing it from the comfort of
your chair at home. You’re not in traffic, so you’re not really reliving it, anyway.
It’s safe.
Kory:
And it doesn’t have to take a long time, sometimes a few minutes.
Let’s move on to another technique you’re known for, Nevillizing. Does
Nevillizing push you to achieve other goals faster?
Joe:
It doesn’t push you, but it convinces you that other goals can be achieved,
and, because you’re convinced those other goals can be achieved, you’re now
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taking down any barriers to making things happen faster. That’s the great beauty of
all of this.
Once you start clicking along, for example, you’ve got your first music CD
finished, then the next one comes along even more quickly because you’ve
removed all the blocks. You’ve paved the way for things to happen faster. So when
somebody starts Nevillizing, you’re imagining the result you want as already
having come to pass. It’s already here. Neville used to say, “Assumption will
harden into fact.”
What he meant was to assume the reality you would like to experience.
Assume that it’s already real. Walk as if it’s real. Feel as if it’s real. Close your
eyes and know that it’s real. You send this signal to the universe. And before you
know it, you’re a whole new being interacting with the universe, and it starts to
come to you.
When it happens the first time, you’ll be convinced of the power, and, from
that point on, anything you Nevillize happens even faster. You’ve convinced
yourself it works.
Kory:
Is this why, after your first CD, the rest have come so quickly?
Joe:
It happens in every field.
It’s probably no accident I’ve written 50+ books. The first one or two,
there’s a learning curve. As I keep doing it, and continue growing and changing
inside, it becomes a no-brainer. There’s still effort. I’ve got to sit down and
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actually write, but it’s not the kind of work that people think of when they think of
work. It’s more like joyful play and self-expression.
In every area I’ve turned to, once I’ve pulled away the blocks and limitations
and gotten the first sign or taste of success, it started to get faster.
It’s probably why people marvel at my life and ask, “How in the world have
you accomplished so much?” Well, I’m just doing what I know to do and there is
nothing in me stalling. There’s nothing in me saying, “You can’t do this. You’re
not the right person for this.” Or, “You don’t have the time for this.” Those are all
excuses.
There are so many stories of people who have accomplished great things
without money, education, experience, or connections. We can go through the
whole list. People have accomplished mind-boggling things with less than nothing
to begin with, a testament to the fact that you can achieve virtually anything. I
don’t know what limits are any more – I can’t imagine them. The sky’s not even
the limit.
As you keep Nevillizing, all the limits disappear and you find yourself in
this magical universe where miracles are the norm.
Kory:
Isn’t that what Zero Limits is all about?
Joe:
Yes.
Kory:
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You have to take a breath to take all of that in.
It seems like every time I turn around, there’s another book on my desk
you’ve written. Someone will say, “Joe’s got another one.” And I think,
“Already?”
Joe:
I slowed down a couple of years ago because my readers would write and
say, “Look, we love you and we love your books, but we can’t keep up.” So I
thought, “Okay, I won’t come out with a book-of-the-month club. I’ll slow down.”
Kory:
So to have the life we want, we have to get clear in our unconscious mind,
rather than the conscious.
One of my students recently asked, “How do you make changes directly
from the conscious into the unconscious, and how do I know I’m doing that?”
How would you answer that?
Joe:
The underlying assumption in that question is that the unconscious and
conscious mind is divided – like the unconscious is one floor of a building and the
conscious another, separate from each other, but it’s not that way.
If there is a line, it’s blurry, like an aquarium where the top level is clear
water, and towards the bottom less so – but it’s all water. With any technique,
when you enter through the conscious mind, you’re entering the top level, and very
quickly, you’re talking to the unconscious mind. It’s not like you’re talking to an
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animal locked-away in the lower area of a building. This is our mind – and our
unconscious is readily available.
If I ask you, “What was your telephone number when you were growing
up?” the answer is not in your conscious mind – it’s in your unconscious mind. But
as soon as I ask the question, it bubbles up quickly from the unconscious mind
because they’re not separate. You can answer it, even though it wasn’t floating
around in your conscious mind until I asked the question.
Also, when we use any of these techniques, even simple dialogue, you’re
entering and making changes in the unconscious mind. When I asked the question
about the phone number you had growing up, the answer came up because of the
dialogue. I asked the question and the answer pops up from you.
Any technique is the entry point to start working, even a conversation with
your Miracles Coach, and going to make changes in the unconscious mind.
Sometimes people think they need to go deeper, and ask me about hypnosis, which
I’m certified in. People think, “I’m going to go into a deep hypnotic trance, and
then I’ll be able to mess with my unconscious” but that’s not what happens.
While hypnosis can be useful, the traditional experience of hypnosis is
similar to what you feel when you close your eyes, take a few deep breaths, and
relax. This is a light form of hypnosis, where you’re totally aware of everything
going on. A part of you might even think, “Well, nothing’s happening. I don’t feel
like this is hypnosis at all.” That’s okay, it is happening – your unconscious mind
is alive and well, and you can talk directly to it.
The fact is, though, you can also talk to it over the phone with a Miracles
Coach, and that’s the great joy in all of this. The point is there’s no real separation.
The conscious mind is easily available – even as it’s trying to handle 12 bits of
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information at any given time. It’s always right there, and you call it forth with the
right question. So any technique reaches the unconscious and does its work there –
because it’s not hidden, or hiding.
Kory:
You’ve mentioned listening to “bubbling” thoughts, and to always make
note of them, because manifestation is already within us. If we’re willing to listen,
it’s like, “Boom, here’s the next step.”
Joe:
Yes, it’s true, and I’ve been learning that in music, too.
My producer, Daniel Barrett, tells me, “Go ahead and free associate.” We
call it “popcorning.” When something pops in my mind, or his mind, we honor that
and say whatever it is – even if I’m listening to a song and see a blue elephant. We
honor whatever shows up because we don’t know where it might lead, and we
want to trust the process. The unconscious might just bubble up a few things that
we’ll want to use – and it’s okay either way. A great deal of trust is involved in
order to get to the results we want.
Kory:
Talking about trust, that’s the first and foremost relationship we try to
establish in Miracles Coaching™.
Joe:
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When you feel trusting and safe, you can go ahead and talk about anything.
You can let things arise and easily remove them. Trust is the first level of
importance.
Kory:
You often use a phrase, “What if up?”
Could you share an example of how you went from a space of not-so-great
energy to “What if up?” and what that did for you?
Joe:
A friend of mine, Mindy Audlin, taught it to me. In fact, I wrote the
foreword for her book, What If It All Goes Right?
Most of us do “What if down?” We get an idea and say, “What if it doesn’t
work? What if I lose all my money on it? What if this is a waste of time? What if
this is not a good investment? What if I beat myself up for the rest of my life?”
This is all the negative stuff.
“What if up?” takes you in the other direction. “What if this is the greatest
idea ever? What if this changes my life forever? What if this is the turning point?
What if this is the greatest investment in my life?” You can literally feel your
energy shift. Your mind opens and more creativity comes in when you play the
“What if up?” game.
My music is a great example. As I mentioned, last October I didn’t call
myself a musician. I finally stood my ground at the beginning of this year and said,
“I am a musician and I am going to do my first CD.” When I said it, my intent was
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to come out with a CD by December. I allowed myself one full year to learn what I
needed – to practice singing, write the music, play the guitar, and get it produced.
Suddenly a publisher showed up in my life and said, “I want to put you on
the cover of the local magazine. It can be for whatever you want.” I started to play
with, “What if up?” thinking, “What if I could get my CD done fast enough to be
on the cover of the magazine? What if I can get the people I need to help me – my
vocal coach, my guitar coach, the producer – what if I can get them all to agree to
help me?”
Then I thought, “What if I could help some of the people who are helping
me produce their own CDs within the same period of time? What if I were on the
cover and I write the feature story and I include these other people and their CDs?”
This was a way of thanking them and creating a win/win/win, my favorite way of
doing business. I want everybody to win.
Next, I thought, “What if I can get this CD done in a few months? Would it
actually be possible? I can’t do it in January. It’s virtually impossible, maybe
February.” All this started to put stress on me, which I don’t like. I want to be able
to lift the bar and stretch, but I don’t want to give myself a heart attack. I want to
be able to enjoy the process. So I thought, “What about March? Yes, I think I can
do March.”
I went to the publisher and said, “Put me on the cover of the April issue for
my music. I’ll have my CD done, and two of my friends are going to have their
CDs done. We’ll have them all done by the time your magazine comes out on
April 1st.” He agreed. Then I talked to my friends, “What if we actually pulled this
off? What if everybody created CDs and we were all in the magazine at the same
time?”
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Now keep in mind that, in this case, when I began “What if up?” I was
giving myself 12 months to create a CD. But as I continued the process, it became
three months – and on the last week of that March month, all three of us were
handing each other our CDs. We had completed them all.
I ended up on the cover of the magazine in April. I also wrote the feature
article talking about my music debut, and I reviewed my CD and the other two
CDs. I put all of that on the website and in my blog. We had a win/win/win, even
the publisher.
Kory:
And you turned it into a miracle, fantastic.
This is the perfect remedy anytime if you feel like you’re spiraling down.
You can immediately turn it around by asking, “What if up?” instead. Just give it
the opposite attention. It makes it exciting, rather than fearful.
Joe:
It does and it’s a fun thing to do – anytime and anyplace.
I’ve even been doing it with my new CD. “What if I end up on the cover of
Rolling Stone® magazine? What if I sell millions of copies and I end up on David
Letterman, Jay Leno, and all these other talk shows, which causes millions more to
sell? And what if I end up being a cover story that says, ‘This guy came out of
nowhere. He’s a self-help author, internet marketer, and now he’s a rock and roll
singer/songwriter. What’s up with him?’”
As soon as you start doing this, your energy level changes. In fact, just doing
it now, I feel like I could run a marathon. The energy in my body is exhilarating.
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Whenever you “What if up?” it’s like turning on the afterburners. You’re adding
more energy to what you’ve already got, and it becomes a blast just to think about.
Kory:
I’m feeling energized just listening to you.
Let’s change gears and talk about money, something on everybody’s mind
these days. In your book, Attract Money Now, you quote Arnold Patent, a spiritual
advisor you had, who said that the sole purpose of money is to express
appreciation. That’s quite different than the way most people think about it.
Joe:
Yes, Arnold Patent, who’s almost 90 years old now, said that in a book he
wrote, called Money.
When I came across that line, it stopped me in my tracks. I reread it several
times, “The sole purpose of money is to express appreciation.” And I kept
thinking, surely that’s wrong. There must be an exception to that – but I couldn’t
think of one. Later, when I had the opportunity to interview him, I asked him about
it, and he said, “Yes, expressing appreciation is the sole purpose of money. We
think it’s just for buying things, or paying for things, but, in reality, if you look at
the deeper spiritual, metaphysical, or psychological reason behind it, you’re really
saying, ‘Thank you.’”
This shifted my whole experience of paying bills. For example, in the past,
I’d grumble about paying my phone bill, like most people. Now, when I pay it, I’m
thinking, “Wow, I’m grateful to have a phone.” I can pay it innocently, without
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any charge on it. I do this with my utilities, as well, thinking, “I really enjoy having
my computer powered. I enjoy having lights on at night, I enjoy watching TV.”
This simple realization will transform your relationship with money –
because you’re reframing your experience of how you use it, even when you buy
“necessities.” As you write your checks, just remember that you’re saying, “Thank
you.” I talk about this in my book, Attract Money Now, as the first step in a 7-step
formula – getting clear about your relationship to money and yourself. Most people
think money is negative, a necessary evil, when it’s actually neutral, meaningless.
If you’ve ever been to a foreign country, you’ll understand what I mean.
When you first see their money, it’s like getting play money. You look at it and
think, “What is this?” In America, we’re brought up with the dollar bill, which
means something to me, but other cultures have their own programming around
money. When you strip it all away, you realize that it’s just paper and coins. It
doesn’t mean anything in and of itself.
So I love Arnold Patent’s quote because it gives positive meaning to money:
The sole purpose of money is to express appreciation. I only wish I had come up
with it, but I didn’t.
Kory:
Most people think in terms of scarcity when they’re paying bills, and say, “I
don’t have any money left.” With this practice, they’re able to have a thought of
abundance and the benefits that come with that thinking.
Joe:
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Yes, it takes you back into gratitude, which we both know is one of the most
powerful ways to transform your life, and bring a miracle on in any moment.
Kory:
Even when you’re not in the best of places, you can think, “What is
something that I can do to turn this into something else, something good?”
Otherwise, negativity begets negativity.
What advice would you give to people who often seem to get sucked into a
negative vortex?
Joe:
One way is to interrupt the pattern.
For example, decades ago when I didn’t have the tools I do now, I had a
coach I made a verbal deal with. Whenever I felt myself drop into a downward
spiral, I would notice it and call him, because I knew that would attract things I
didn’t want. I wanted to break the pattern, so if it happened and I couldn’t pull
myself out of it, I’d pick up the phone, talk to my coach, and get out of it. That’s
the beauty of having someone like a Miracles Coach.
For people doing it on their own, create a bag of tricks for yourself. Learn
techniques and processes to help you, like “What if up?” Instead of using energy to
pull yourself down, what if you can use it to pull yourself up? Play with different
possibilities. I have plenty of information to support you in my books, audios,
DVDs, blog, and on my main website – free articles, content podcasts, and video
clips. And if it isn’t me, go to someone that really excites you, inspires you, or
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makes you laugh – online or off. The bottom line is, do something to break the
cycle. The more you break it, the more things will turn around.
At the very least, make a mental agreement, or even a physical one out loud
with your Miracles Coach, that whenever you feel like this is happening, you’ll do
something to stop it. When you start feeling like you’re falling out, or getting
negative, do something to make the shift. There are many opportunities and tools
available.
Kory:
I agree – if you want it, you can have it, anything you want to be, do, or
have.
Thank you, Joe, for sharing with us today.
Joe:
Thank you, Kory. God speed to all.
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Secret Session #2
Joe Vitale with Gregory Downey
Gregory:
With tremendous gratitude, welcome, Joe.
Joe:
Thank you, Gregory. I’m glad to be here, and looking forward to lots of
great questions.
Gregory:
I have plenty for you today.
My first one is, have you ever been in a situation where you feel that
something negative is stuck in your heart, but you can’t define it clearly? In other
words, after diving into it and applying other tools, you weren’t able to get to the
root of it? How do you get rid of something like this?
Joe:
Yes, I’ve been there, and I’m sure all of us have – and that’s okay.
The good news is you don’t need to know the cause of whatever feeling is
lodged in your heart, all you have to do is clean or clear it. Often people think, “I
have to get to the root of it. I have to do some sort of Freudian psychoanalysis, and
find out if it started when I was three years old, or after that.” It’s just not true.
If you happen to have the story of it, and it gives insight on where an
emotion came from, that’s interesting, but not where the real healing takes place. A
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story is just a story. Once you have the story you can re-write it and make a
different one.
The important lesson, though, is you don’t need to know where something
came from, or even be able to articulate what exactly it is that’s bothering you.
Just having that heaviness, emotional pain, or heartache – some sort of description
of it – is all you need to begin the process of cleaning and clearing.
To do this, I often use Ho’oponopono, the technique I describe in Zero
Limits, where you say, “I love you, I’m sorry, please forgive me and thank you,”
not to the ache, not to anyone, but to your connection to what I call the Divine.
You might refer to it as something else – God, life, higher power, energy,
intelligence, or the collective unconscious. Regardless of how you name it, what
you’re doing is cleaning and clearing that feeling. That’s it.
Other useful techniques include tapping (EFT), and talking with your
Miracles Coach. It can be as simple as just allowing the feeling – wherever and
whatever it is, without knowing anything about it. From there, you can begin the
process of releasing it.
Gregory:
So just be aware of it, validate that it’s out of place, and then begin to clear
it.
Joe:
Yes, it can be that simple.
Too often people want to know where the feeling came from because they’re
looking for a source to blame. But that’s not helpful, and certainly not part of
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healing. The healing that I teach, and that we focus on in Miracles Coaching™, is
100% responsibility for whatever is going on in your world – everything.
If you’ve got it, you own it – regardless of how it came to be there. It’s your
being, your life, your body, your mind, and your feeling. That’s 100%
responsibility – and the first step.
Gregory:
Growing up, I had a good friend who used to borrow things of mine. Then,
when I’d want it back, sometimes he’d be reluctant because he enjoyed having it.
He used to say, “You know, possession is 9/10ths of the law.” Essentially he was
telling me, “Hey, you’re not going to get it back because I have it now, so I own
it.”
I used to hate that saying, but now, as a Miracles Coach, it’s really
appropriate. In fact, I actually wrote an article called “Possession is 9/10ths of the
Law” about taking 100% responsibility.
Instead of pointing the finger and complaining, or victimizing ourselves over
it, once we see we have it and are willing to own it, then we can get rid of it – in
that order.
Joe:
Yes, and another good title would be, “100% Possession of the Problem
Leads to 100% Healing of It.”
Gregory:
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Is listening to a recording of Ho’oponopono as effective as saying it out
loud, or thinking it?
Joe:
The short answer is no, it’s not going to be as effective. However, I don’t
want people to dismiss it completely because it’s still useful to listen to a
recording, whether it’s your voice, my voice, or somebody else’s.
I have recordings for myself like this. For example, Pat O’Bryan and I
created “clearing” audios – some subliminal and some audible – that have
statements on them. They do help, but it’s more powerful when you do it yourself,
either out loud, or internally, with focus and intention dedicated to doing the
process and making a clearing.
Gregory:
Why is Ho’oponopono so effective? Is it because, when we use our own
voice, we’re confessing and validating that we’re 100% responsible?
Joe:
Yes, you’re taking 100% responsibility, and you’re also 100% involved
when it’s your voice, your chant, your thinking, your meditation, and your process.
Again, I’m not dismissing the idea of listening to someone else doing it in
the background, but if you want the full impact, 100% results, like I do, than you
need to do it yourself. That’s where real transformation is.
Gregory:
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Do you have anything to say about the order in which the phrases are said?
I’ve had some students say, “I just feel like the natural progression, or flow, should
be this other way.”
Joe:
I asked Dr. Hew Len, the man who taught me this method and who coauthored Zero Limits with me, about this. He said to say it in the order that feels
right to you. It doesn’t matter, regardless of how others do it. It needs to be in the
order that you feel the flow with.
I tend to say, “I’m sorry, please forgive me” as the opening statements. In
this sense, I’m saying, “I’m sorry that I was unconscious to whatever it was that
pulled the experience into my life; please forgive me for being unaware.” I’m
beginning with an admission of, “I was off the mark, I wasn’t quite aware, I was
sleepwalking, I wasn’t conscious.”
Then I move into “Thank you” because I’m acknowledging gratitude.
Gratitude is the single most powerful thing you can do to transform yourself in any
moment, no matter where you’re at. When I say thank you, it’s an
acknowledgement to the Divine for taking care of the problem. I end with the
phrase “I love you” because it moves me into the highest vibration I can think of –
one that will transmute anything going on that I perceived as a problem.
Gregory:
So there are four steps to the equation:
 Accepting 100% responsibility – I’m sorry.
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 Asking for forgiveness – Please forgive me.
 Expressing gratitude – Thank you.
 Expressing love – I love you.
Joe:
Yes, that’s the combination code that works for me, but find the one that
works for you.
Somebody else may want to start with “I love you” to jump right into the
space of unconditional appreciation, and then move into the other phrases. It’s up
to you and what you’re feeling in the moment, which can change from time to
time. There’s no one right order.
Gregory:
What if someone’s moving into a new phase and wants more enlightenment
and abundance, but none of the clearing methods are working?
Joe:
The thing to remember is they are working, even if you don’t see the
immediate, visible result that you’re focused on.
Often there’s a trust issue going on, especially when somebody’s saying,
“Look, I’m doing these exercises, but they don’t seem to be working so I want to
stop. I don’t see the end result so I doubt the whole thing. I no longer have trust in
this process.” In other words, we’re trying to attract a specific result and when we
don’t see it in front of us, we get upset and think, “This doesn’t work.”
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I asked Dr. Hew Len about this, and he said if you could see the layers of
belief and programming being erased as you do this process, you would never
question it or stop doing it.
In this moment, what you have is a reflection of your past thoughts, feelings,
beliefs, decisions, and actions. You manifested this moment, so own it and
appreciate it. When you do, you won’t be looking around going, “Oh, I want a
better moment.” Instead, you’ll be saying, “This moment is great, I love this
moment, and I’m going to keep cleaning to make my next moments even better.”
Gregory:
So, like Wayne Dyer says, you’ve got to believe it before you see it, rather
than the other way around.
Joe:
Yes, because the miracle you’re looking for is right here, in this moment.
Just find something to be grateful for. I can look around and see any number
of things, even the floor I’m standing on. Thank goodness I’ve got one here
because I’m on the second floor of the building, and I would be collapsing or
falling if it wasn’t here. Anybody can look around in their moment and find
something, anything, to be grateful for – a pet, a person, their refrigerator, their
phone, or a phone call.
When you move into the experience of being grateful now, you realize
you’re already in the miracle. This is the miracle. When you start waiting for
something else to come into your life – and then you’ll be grateful – that’s selfwww.miraclescoaching.com
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sabotage. You’ve tricked yourself into not appreciating the miracle that’s already
at your feet.
Almost everybody falls for the idea that, “When I get the better job, more
income, the relationship, better health, a bigger house – then I’ll be happy.” But
that’s a trick of the mind. As soon as you do get that bigger house, the person, or
the income – whatever it was you were looking for – for a moment you’ll feel the
elation, and then you’ll be looking down the street for more money, another
relationship, or a bigger house. You’ll just fall into the mental trap again.
Just be here in this moment, appreciating it. Keep cleaning and clearing as
you proceed to create your future moments. And whatever you do, don’t fall for
the mental trap that says, “This moment isn’t so great. Clearing must not be
working, and everything I’m doing must not be working, because nothing’s
changed.”
Everything is changing. Everything is in constant motion. Right now as
we’re speaking everything in the world is changing. True, we can’t see it all. Our
conscious mind can barely perceive anything going on in any one minute anyway.
It’s our unconscious mind that’s collecting all the data and that’s where we’re
doing all the cleaning. Trust – because it is working.
Gregory:
You always encourage people to move up levels in their social status.
Can you give us ideas for meeting people of like mind and goals, or moving
into a higher socioeconomic group?
Joe:
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I’ve written about it in some of my early books, and recently wrote about it
again in my new book, Instant Manifestation.
It can be as simple as rearranging your office. In other words, where you’re
sitting, and what you have around you, is influencing your mental thought
processes right now. When I look around in my office, I see success literature all
around me – I still read it. I have books like Napoleon Hill’s classic, Think and
Grow Rich, and brand new authors. I’m also reading about the neurosciences and
neuroplasticity, and new concepts in changing our brain. We’re not our brain –
we’re a power that can actually use our brain and change it.
I continue to read, listen to audios, and use coaches to raise my own levels of
success. A year ago I was not a musician – I had not written or sung a single song.
Yet as of today, I have two CD’s on the market, and my first singing, songwriting
CD being duplicated. How did I raise my status from being a non-musician to
being a musician? First, I stated a clear intention to do it. Second, I told people I
was a musician, even though at that point, I was just toying around on the guitar.
Third, I started to surround myself with musicians, asking around and
putting the word out that I wanted to sing and learn to play the guitar. Who could
teach me these things?
You can do the same thing in the business world. I’d say to join some of the
networking clubs, like Rotary, or even a church group. You can start by looking
online for networking groups in your area. Meetup.com is a great resource for
groups like this. Attend a few and see if they’re for you.
Here’s a million dollar tip, something that worked for me when I was a
complete unknown living in Houston a few decades ago: I became a speaker who
spoke for free. I started with the Rotary Clubs and business networking groups,
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offering to teach them how to write and publish books, which is what I could do at
that time. It’s a great way to raise your level, because, when you stand in front of
people as a speaker, they see you as a peer and an expert. And, guess what? They
want to hang around you.
But remember, you can begin at home with the things you surround yourself
with. What are you reading and listening to? Try some audio programs from
Nightingale Conant. Read success literature – self-help and pop psychology. A lot
of excellent material has been around since the 1800s, and is still in print. Some of
it’s free online, or you can go to Amazon and browse. And I’m not just talking
about my books – there are lots of books that might fall into that category.
As you change your mind, declare new intentions, and start taking action,
you’ll begin to attract and meet other people. Consider putting yourself out there as
a speaker, and, at the very least, attend some networking groups. They’re in every
city and meet for breakfast, lunch, or dinner. See which ones appeal to you and
have the status you want to belong to.
Gregory:
When you were starting out, did the way that people’s perceptions of you as
a speaker have an effect on the way that you perceived yourself? Did it increase
your confidence at all?
Joe:
Yes, in fact, I remember the first speech I gave in Houston. I spoke to all six
people in it – and shook so bad I thought I was going to pass out and slide to the
ground. I really had to work on myself.
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At first, you’re uncomfortable with everything you do for the most part, but
as you keep doing it, it gets easier.
Gregory:
You also talk about benestrophe in Instant Manifestation. Can you tell us
more about that?
Joe:
It’s a newly coined word and is the opposite of catastrophe. It means a lot of
great things happening at once.
We all know about catastrophes, the disasters because the media is
constantly reporting on them. But what about a benestrophe? It’s a language
change, and language influences everything we think and do. It’s important for
people to become aware of how they’re using it.
The mindset of most people is focused on the negative – our thoughts are
critical and doubting. It would almost appear it’s the natural current for our brain to
go in, if only because we’ve been doing it for so long. In Miracles Coaching™, and
in all my material, the goal is to help people start thinking positive. If they do,
they’ll lead a more positive life. They’ll act positive and get positive results.
When people think in terms of catastrophes, or negativity, their energy
plummets. They don’t feel optimistic about life and don’t feel like doing anything.
But you can change your energy by thinking thoughts like, “Wow, there is magic
and miracles in the world! What if it all works out? What if everything I want to
try actually will work? What if this cleaning process I’m doing is actually making
a difference?”
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Playing with language is one of the things we can do to make a difference in
our life and attract miracles. Benestrophe is just one way to do it. It’s a fun word,
and I love it!
Gregory:
Affirmations help with that, too, which some of your audios include.
For example, there’s an affirmation in an audio you did with Pat O’Bryan
called “Clearing for Money” about not spending your money before you have it.
Could you please explain what you mean by that and what is the underlying
principle?
Joe:
It’s not as complicated as it might seem. If you don’t have money, don’t
spend it. In other words, don’t rely on your credit cards, and don’t get into debt.
Debt is not wealth to me and can get you in trouble financially and mentally.
It happened to me. After being homeless, I was in poverty for a while, but
managed to get a credit card. I would tell myself, “It’s okay to go out to eat
because I deserve it.” I did all kinds of wonderful things when I didn’t have the
money – I’d just put it on my credit card.
When you start using credit cards and mounting debt, it gets difficult to keep
up because these companies charge 18 to 30% interest. Paying off that $50 dinner
suddenly becomes a $300 debt. Some people suggest it’s okay to leverage your
debt, but it’s easy to deceive yourself and say, “I don’t have the money to buy this
jacket, but I have a credit card so put it on that.” The fact is if you don’t have the
money in your pocket or bank account, you shouldn’t buy it.
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In my book, Attract Money Now, I talk about prosperous purchasing, and
one of the seven steps is to stay away from debt when buying something. If you
want prosperity and to feel prosperous, you may have to do it in baby steps until
your consciousness and self-worth expands. If you work with someone, like a
Miracles Coach, it’ll get easier and more prosperity will come to you.
Gregory:
Is it safe to visualize yourself enjoying receiving and spending money in the
future before the money actually comes to you?
Joe:
Absolutely, I do that today.
I’m always expanding my own wealth consciousness, reaching for higher
levels. For example, I visualize that when my new CD comes out, I’m going to
take ads out in Rolling Stone® magazine, and hire publicists and marketing people.
I’m not there yet, but I do it to increase my wealth level.
Gregory:
So it’s safe to see yourself spending the money in your visualization, but not
safe to spend it in terms of going into debt.
Joe:
Yes, go ahead and be King Tut in your mind. Have a field day – because it’ll
help you create it in reality. Then, when it’s in your reality, have fun, spend it, and
invest it.
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Gregory:
What if someone feels guilty about doing that?
For example, what if they feel their mission is selfish, or not good enough
because, rather than dare something worthy, what they really want is to travel the
world and have fun while they’re here on planet earth?
Joe:
I would say they’re trying to dodge responsibility.
Saying you just want to travel and have fun is a cop out. There is a way to
travel and have fun and still make a contribution to the world. It’s about being
more creative and innovative. Maybe you could start your own travel agency, or
create fun tour groups. You’d be traveling and having fun, but doing it in such a
way that it helps other people.
When we’re totally focused on ourselves and don’t want to make a
difference, that is being selfish. It’s like saying you want to be a teenager all your
life. If you really want miracles in your life, help other people because the things
you want come through people. Notice I said through, not from. Even my book,
Attract Money Now, which I give away for free at www.attractmoneynow.com, has a 7step formula for attracting money that includes helping your community and your
world.
I’m all for traveling and having fun. I do all that and still want to make a
difference. So when people say that, I don’t think they’re being honest with
themselves about what it is they really want to do – but are afraid to do. There’s
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nothing wrong with pursuing fun and travel, but there’s something incomplete
about it in and of itself. I would look deeper. Who knows? It could be a hint of
your life’s calling.
I’d also like to know what they mean by fun. Maybe there’s an
entrepreneurial aspect they could apply to it, like traveling around and hosting
sporting events at donkey basketball games. Obviously I’m making this up, but the
point is we are here to help each other. Yes, we’re here to learn and have miracles.
We’re here to have a ball – while helping others.
Relationships, money, all the things we want in life, are going to come
through other people. So you’ve got to make a contribution, and there isn’t any
way around this. In fact, the more contribution you make while still having fun, the
more you can profit. A great example of this is Derek Sivers, who created CD
Baby and recently sold it for $20 million. He said that the key to creating a
business is in sharing. Share whatever it is you would normally – sell as a way to
help people. His whole focus is on helping people.
So find a way to help people in some way related to travel and fun, or those
things you want to do. It’s a more complete path.
Gregory:
Are people just afraid of the responsibility of making a difference? And, if
so, what would be the underlying root?
Joe:
I’ve found that the number one thing people resist is taking full
responsibility for their lives. They don’t want it. They want problems to be
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someone else’s fault, and they want things to just drop in their lap from somebody
else.
Taking 100% responsibility means everything comes from within yourself,
and when you take that kind of responsibility, it’s a great freeing moment. It’s as
though you pulled the legendary sword out of the stone and now you have super
powers. You no longer give the power away to anybody else. You have it.
Gregory:
I once made a really, really dumb decision that cost me not only a huge
chunk of money – $160,000 – but a promise I made to my wife that I would never
borrow against our family home. I’ve learned to say this without shame or regret,
taking full responsibility for my mistake, and owning my junk. I have nothing to
hide. Being able to say it, to hear it from my own voice and to own it has made
such a big difference in my life.
Joe:
That’s great, because most people are afraid to make mistakes and, if they
do, often don’t get past them.
Years ago I ran into a billionaire who had said he had failed numerous times
before he hit a winning streak and actually started making a lot of money. He told
me he’d learned something profound from failure – that nothing bad happens to
you. And knowing nothing bad ever happens to you takes away the fear. It’s
priceless.
People will have an idea for a business or product and think, “I’m afraid.
What if I do attempt it and it fails?” Just remember the billionaire’s story – nothing
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bad happens to you. The world forgives, the world forgets, it keeps on clocking
along, and isn’t going to think about you at all.
Most of the time we beat ourselves up far more than anybody else would
even get close to doing. As you pointed out in your own wonderful story of losing
$160,000, you learned from it, and that’s the whole point. Lots of things I’ve tried
didn’t work out. I don’t even call them failures. I just say, “Well, that didn’t work.”
That’s it, it simply didn’t work. Then I either try something else or revise
what I did. I don’t even talk about most of the things I try that don’t work because
there’s not all that much to share. That’s why some people might look at me and
think, “Oh, you’ve got a constant winning streak.” No, I just don’t talk about the
times I went up to bat and missed.
Gregory:
So not dwelling on it is an important principle.
What about when other people are involved with you? Do you agree with
what Abraham says, that one person in the vortex is mightier than a whole village?
For example, one of my students teamed up with four other investors to do
his first buy, fix, and sell project. But due to unforeseen obstructions, they had to
postpone selling. Now they’re at the point where they have to sell within the next
month to avoid double holding costs. He’s been struggling with the group’s
energy, but knows he has to manifest his reality no matter who he's involved with.
Is there a way he can manifest a quick sale with the perfect buyer, even
when there’s a lot of resistance in the group?
Joe:
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I agree with the Abraham quote – one person can be the strongest. I’m not
being flippant, or saying to just dismiss everybody else in the group. They may be
having a lot of fear, but if you’re all invested, everyone’s going for a common
goal, so you want to work this out.
If this were me, I’d Nevillize this, which is Step 4 in my book, The Attractor
Factor. I created the term Nevillize after Neville Goddard, a well-known
metaphysical teacher and author in the 40s and 50s. He used to say, “Go to the end
result of what it is that you want to attract.” In other words, whatever it is you want
to manifest and see, act as if it’s already over. Imagine what you would do then,
something that feels right, appropriate, and believable to you.
For example, your student could imagine that one week from now he’s
celebrating and going out to dinner with the people involved. Everyone’s happy,
smiling, clinking champagne glasses together because the deal is done. He found
the seller, everything was perfect, the money exchanged hands, and all is well. He
feels it. It’s over, and he’s thinking, “Wow, that was a lot easier than what I
thought.”
Nevillelizing is different than visualizing. In visualizing, you might see
yourself finding the right person, they write the check, you close the deal, and
everything’s okay. That’s fine, and it does work, but I find it more powerful to
Nevillize the end result, to go past it.
In other words, you’re not thinking about manifesting in the future. It’s done
now, and you step into the end result in your mind. You visualize as though you’re
at that dinner, the deal is done, and the group is letting out a sigh of relief. They
might even be looking at you saying, “Congratulations, you’re the one that pulled
it out of the fire.”
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Gregory:
Would you also do Ho’oponopono?
Joe:
Absolutely, and that’s the deeper level to all of this, because the people you
encounter represent your own belief system – no matter how hard it may be to
accept this idea at first.
As huge and heavy as it is, this is the way I live my life. It’s the reality of my
world. Anybody that’s showing up in my world is actually me – whether they’re in
conflict and not in alignment with me, or negative towards me, or if I’m part of a
group that’s anxious and not on the same page as me. It doesn’t matter what it is,
they represent some aspect of me that still believes what they’re articulating.
This is why Ho’oponopono is so powerful – because you’re taking 100%
responsibility and saying, “Okay, it isn’t my spouse, it isn’t my employer, it isn’t
these people investing with me, it isn’t anybody on the outside. They’re mirrors of
what’s in me.”
You take it to the Divine, or God, and say, “I’m sorry, I don’t know what
kind of program is in me that attracted these kinds of people, but they’re here. So
please forgive me for being unconscious to my own inner beliefs, as I can see
they’re being unconscious. Please forgive me.”
Then you move into thank you by saying, “Thank you for taking care of
this, thank you for resolving the issue, thank you for handling the negativity within
me that I see in others because I know it’s only a perception.”
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The fourth phrase (although as I mentioned before you can say them in any
order) is, “I love you.” This is where you move back into the space of gratitude and
unconditional love.
“I’m sorry, please forgive me, thank you, I love you.” This is how you can
take care of everything going on in your life on a spiritual, core level.
Gregory:
This is one of the joys of being a Miracles Coach, being able to share these
principles and techniques with our students, so they can achieve greater abundance,
and see miracles in their own life.
Before we say good-bye, is there anything you’d like to add?
Joe:
I’d just like to remind people that everything you’re looking for is right here.
You may not believe it because you keep thinking, “Oh, but I want something
else.” Trust me, the something else will come faster when you’re in this moment –
and grateful.
Years ago, this is one of the biggest lessons I had to learn. Before I would
think, “I’ll be grateful when I get my job, when I get my first book published,
when I get my first success….” But that’s not how this works.
You have to be genuinely grateful – in this moment – appreciating anything
that you can see. Feel it now, and it will cause the miracles you’re looking for to
speed up. The next moment will get better and better. It will put you in a state of
awe, and you’ll live a life of magic and miracles – but it starts right now, be
grateful now.
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Gregory:
It’s been my pleasure to talk with you, Joe. We’re so grateful and appreciate
your time.
Joe:
Thank you, Gregory, and God speed to everybody.
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Secret Session #3
Joe Vitale with Michelle Minzghor
Michelle:
Joe, welcome!
I’d like to start out today with a quote written by Cicero, a Roman
statesman, orator, and writer, “The grateful heart is not only the greatest virtue but
the parent of all others.” How would you interpret that?
Joe:
To me it means that a grateful heart is what transforms your life.
When I was in my struggle for years – homeless for a while, and in poverty
for a very long time – I wasn’t happy or grateful. I didn’t look at the positive, and I
didn’t have a giving mindset. Mostly, I was after what I could get for me. This
attitude of an ungrateful heart kept me in survival, and as long as I had it, I stayed
there.
Having a grateful heart means you open your heart for the ability to give, as
well as for the ability to receive – and as soon as I started to move in that direction,
my life began to shift. I didn’t do it instantly, so I didn’t have an instantaneous
result. I was resistant, just putting my little toe in the water to see if this gratefulheart-kind-of-mentality actually made a difference. And it did.
I discovered that the more grateful I could be, the more giving and generous
I became in whatever way was available to me, and the more I began to receive. I
became able to receive joy, love, material goods, spiritual nourishment, and
inspiration.
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That’s the power of a grateful heart – Cicero was right.
Michelle:
As we become grateful and allow ourselves to recognize the blessings and
gifts that are given to us, it’s like receiving a light into our soul – which then
allows us to be more compassionate, humble, helpful, and kind.
I can’t imagine somebody that has a grateful heart not having those other
virtues.
Joe:
It begins there, but I can relate to people who are resistant to this idea
because I had that mindset, too. I thought, “Sure, I’ll be grateful when I have
something to be grateful for.”
It took a long time for me to soften, and realize that when I could be grateful
now for whatever was in my moment, my heart opened up. I was then able to see
the joy and gifts that were all around me, and open myself to receive more joy and
gifts. And, at that point, I was able to attract these to me.
Michelle:
So you went from a negative, scarcity mindset to saying, “I have to change
my heart in order to be willing to receive.”
What allowed you to make that shift?
Joe:
I think it’s different for everybody, including Cicero.
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When I heard about the grateful heart, this idea of giving and being
generous, I was suspicious. I had to test it by giving something I had a lot of,
something I felt I could always attract into my life – books.
In other words, I was having trouble bringing in money and keeping it, so
the idea of releasing money by giving it away wasn’t something I could do. To be
blunt, I was too scared, too suspicious. So I looked around and thought, “Well, I
always seem to have books around me. Let me start giving away books and see
what happens.”
Most of the books I had were from people who wanted me to review or
promote them, not because I purchased them. Yes, I bought some, but I wasn’t a
wealthy man and couldn’t buy a lot of things like that. So, as these books came
into my life, I started reflecting on where I could share them. If someone
mentioned an area of interest, I’d give them a book related to that, if I had one.
This was my way of testing the idea of generosity, by simply giving something that
was easy for me to give.
We’re told through many religions and spiritual teachings that the more
money you give to wherever you receive spiritual nourishment, the more money
you will receive. But I couldn’t do that with money because I was too stubborn,
resistant, and suspicious. That’s why I chose books.
What happened is quite astonishing, really. More and more books showed up
in my life – even to the point where I got my first book published, and then my
second book. I entered a wealth publishing stream, where books were coming into
my life, and my own books were being published and going out into the world. I’d
get copies of my own book, distribute those to people, and other authors that I
admired began sending me their books.
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It all started with me testing with something I felt I could do. After that I
said, “If it worked for books, maybe it’ll work for money,” which is what we’re
told all along. That was the next level, experimenting with the grateful heart in
giving money, even when, at first, it felt like, “Oh, I can’t give more than a dime, I
can’t give more than a dollar.” That’s where I started.
Over time I kept increasing the level of giving, and noting my level of
discomfort as I stretched my comfort zone. It still bothered me to give money
because I was so attached to survival. I wanted to eat, pay rent, and pay for the
clunker car I owned that kept breaking down. But even though I resisted giving
money, I continued because of what I had seen in the book world. And as I started
to give a little bit of money, more money started coming in, sometimes from
unexpected places.
For example, after years of struggling to get my writing published, it started
to change. I had some things published and got paid for that. Keep in mind this was
well before the internet, and it was a long process for me. I had to save up money
for postage and manila envelopes, then send articles off and wait six weeks to six
months before any response.
I never stretched to the point where I was breaking the bank, though. In
other words, I didn’t write a check for everything I had, only for what I felt was
doable, yet still felt like a stretch. More and more opportunities continued coming
my way. The more I gave money, the more money would come in. Today I feel
like a member of the “Lifestyle of the Rich and Famous,” and money still comes in
unexpected ways – all because I’m giving and sharing and living Cicero’s grateful
heart.
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Michelle:
You stretched yourself when you didn’t think it was possible and it
happened, which is similar to the idea we talk about in Miracles Coaching™ –
daring something worthy.
Joe:
Yes, it’s all about stretching. It’s about doing what we really want to do
anyway, pushing ourselves past our own doubt and inner resistance.
For example, that’s what I’m doing with my music. A year ago, I had not
written a song, or ever sang in public, let alone in a recording studio. I couldn’t
keep a beat and only knew a handful of guitar chords – yet here I am today,
promoting my own CDs.
There was a latent desire for me to be a musician, but I didn’t have
everything together. I made a decision, though, a choice, and said, “I am going to
do this.” I set my intention, gathered my coaches and team, and started taking
action – in spite of feeling like, “Wow, I don’t know that I can actually do this. I
don’t know that I can pull this off.” But I just kept stretching.
Every time those doubts came up, I would work with a coach to question and
release them. I kept daring something worthy, and now I’m able to look at a copy
of my own CD and feel proud. I’m like a little kid inside thinking, “I did it! I did
it!”
All of us have some sort of parallel where we want to do something, but
we’ve got to stretch for it, whether that’s giving with the grateful heart, or pursuing
a dream of ours. It gets down to facing those fears – and using that fear as energy –
to get the dream created.
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Michelle:
We suggest students get into a positive mindset by using a gratitude journal
– making lists and literally counting their blessings, naming them one by one. It’s a
helpful process for the mind to see what we can be grateful for, and from there,
transition into giving.
Giving is one of the ways we actually show our gratitude, and it’s a
phenomenal way to move from where we used to be, to where we’d like to be. We
start by recognizing our blessings and what we’ve been given, and then stretch
ourselves into giving – even when we don’t think we have anything to give.
Joe:
Yes, and we always have something to give.
I was interviewed about this subject, and asked, “Some people don’t have
money. Is it okay if they give of their time, energy, experience, or skills?” I said,
“Of course it’s okay to give of whatever they have, however, that’s often a cop out
– something they do instead of giving money.”
People often say they’re having trouble attracting money, earning money,
finding unexpected income, or getting more sales. I’ll ask them, “Are you giving
money to wherever you receive spiritual nourishment, whether that’s your church
or your bus driver?” Most of them say no, and, when I ask why, it’s because
they’re afraid.
Think about this – what kind of message are you giving to yourself if you
hold back on your giving? Aren’t you confirming that you believe in scarcity?
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Aren’t you confirming that you don’t believe in yourself, or in the giving
principle?
When you do give, you’re saying, “I live in an abundant universe. I trust, I
believe, I’m grateful, I’m generous, and I know this is coming back.” You feel
better. When you don’t give, when you don’t have a grateful heart, you feel a down
energy. Your whole body droops – you won’t have that little spring in your step.
But when you start to believe in yourself and take positive actions towards
giving in a variety of ways, you affirm life. You’re in the flow and you can feel it
in your body as your heart opens. You can feel the gusto in your life moving you
along, and things begin to happen more rapidly.
So I tell people, “Don’t deceive yourself, you can also give money.” We’ve
all got it. We may have different degrees of it, but you can give a tiny percentage
of it. Ten percent is the general rule of thumb – more than that and you’ll probably
feel a little uncomfortable. This will help you get into Cicero’s grateful heart
experience, and also realize you attract what you want by doing it.
Michelle:
The scriptures talk about it, too, for example, “Give and it shall be given
unto you.” And it doesn’t say to wait until you have enough, or wait until your
children are grown.
There’s another quote I like, from Cynthia Christy, who we interviewed this
month on “Learning for Leaders.” She said, “Giving is like electricity, it works
every time.” She went on to say, “Money is a flow, it flows through our life. If we
hold onto it, it blocks the flow of more money flowing.”
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She’s an amazing woman who has statistics and facts on what physically
happens in our body when we choose to give. She mentioned that some doctors are
now prescribing “giving” to their patients – because it helps the healing process in
the body.
Joe:
Finally prescriptions we don’t have to go to the drugstore for.
Michelle:
Yes, and she told us the story of her friend, who began experiencing extreme
pain in her hands, and then suddenly her eyes wouldn’t focus. When she went to
the doctor, he diagnosed MS as rapidly debilitating her body. She called Christy,
who advised, “Don’t focus on your pain. You need to stop thinking about
yourself.” The woman answered, “What do you mean? I don’t have anything else
to focus on. Look at me, I’m an utter mess.”
Christy responded, “You’re feeling your disease. I’m going to give you a
challenge. I challenge you to give away 29 gifts in 29 days. You can give anything
– a phone call, a word, a thought, a prayer. The key thing, though, is you must give
with an open heart, not expecting anything in return, and be grateful for what you
have.” Her friend decided, “Okay, I’ll take the challenge.”
The first day she called another friend of hers that had MS to give
encouragement. After just one week of doing seven encouraging things, giving
seven gifts, she said that she felt more positive. Two weeks later, she began
walking without her cane, and on day 29, she and her husband actually walked an
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entire mile together. She had enthusiasm for her life again, and knew she had
something to give in spite of what had been taken from her.
Joe:
Stories like this reinforce what we’re talking about. In fact there’s a book
about it called 29 Gifts: How a Month of Giving Can Change Your Life. Anyone
can do this for 29 days – and see how their life changes.
I have a quote in front of me by Anne Frank that says, “No one has ever
become poor by giving,” and another from Einstein, “It is every man’s obligation
to put back into the world at least the equivalent of what he takes out of it. The
value of a man resides in what he gives and not in what he is capable of receiving.”
Michelle:
A few years ago, we had a student who was struggling in his business and in
financial despair. Two weeks after we started coaching, he said, “Somehow my
father got wind of my financial struggles and wrote me a check for $1,700.”
I said, “That’s a miracle, and now I’m going to challenge you to do
something – give 10% of that away to the charity of your choice or ask God to
direct you to where that 10% belongs to.” Within a month after that, his business
took off and he began to receive more orders. He received so much from that one
financial gift that he said, “I do the books for my company every two weeks, and I
cannot wait to see what our profits are so I know how big that check is I get to
write.”
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Have you heard of the movie, Forever Strong? It’s the true story of Rugby
coach Larry Gelwix, and the team he coached for over 35 years. He’s a speaker
now, and whenever he talks, he offers his audience two challenges.
His first challenge is to find someone you don’t need anything from – maybe
don’t even know – and do something for them without any expectation in return.
The second challenge is to seek out a job that you would normally say, “That’s not
my job,” and do it anyway. He challenges people to do this for seven days with the
promise that, if you keep it up and journal or share those experiences with a
partner, you will be a changed person at the end of seven days.
Joe:
That’s an amazing idea.
Michelle:
I also like what Robert Allen and Mark Victor Hanson have to say in their
book, The One Minute Millionaire, that sharing is having more.
They say that if you go behind the scenes of the most grateful fortunes,
you’ll find a common pattern – the more they gave, the more they got. Here’s a
quote from the book:
…giving expands money. How? Just as water exists in three forms, ice,
liquid and vapor, we find it useful to think that money exists in three
dimensions: the frozen state (material), the liquid state (mental), and the
ethereal or spiritual state. If you give money from an attitude of gratitude
and abundance, it thrusts you from the material state into ethereal or
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spiritual dimension. Sir John Marks Templeton, founder of the successful
Templeton Funds, once said that, “Tithing gives you the greatest return on
your investment.”
Joe:
Dan Kennedy once told me that the window in your life where you receive
money is made bigger by how much you give.
It’s all psychological. If you’re receiving a little bit, you have a little window
of receiving. The way to expand and make your window bigger, so you can receive
more, is by giving. When people don’t give, they’ve closed down their
understanding of life itself, coming from a viewpoint that says, “There isn’t
enough. I’m not going to get my share, so I better hold onto what I have.”
Holding is the thing that causes the restriction around receiving. When you
let go and start to give, you put yourself in the flow of life – and the flow of money
as circulation. You build that bigger window to receive more.
Then, as you start receiving, you give more and make the window even
bigger. You can see this with tycoons like Rockefeller who started giving and kept
increasing it – it’s no wonder they became so wealthy. It wasn’t so much a matter
of what they were doing in their businesses, although obviously that’s part of it.
It’s what they were doing internally, how they felt about themselves and the world,
and about giving and receiving.
Whatever it is that you want to receive in the world, give that – and the more
you give of that, the more you will receive that. This is powerful stuff, especially
when I think back to the stubborn, close-minded Joe Vitale, giving away books,
and being startled by all the books that showed up in his life. And then doing it
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again with money and watching money start to come in – when, for decades, if not
most of my life, it wasn’t there or it just trickled in.
Michelle:
Yes, it is truly powerful, and it happened in my own life.
There was a period of time when I was in real estate and nothing was going
right. I said, “Okay, you’ve got to get back to being a tithe-paying woman.” I
reminded myself of the promise in the Bible that says “the windows of heaven will
be opened unto you so much that you won’t have room to receive it.”
I started paying tithe again and within just a few months, clients and deals
began falling into my lap – and I didn’t have time enough in a day to work for
them.
Joe:
You mentioned keeping a journal, and, I agree, it’s important to write down
what’s going on because we become so much more aware when we start writing
things down. If we don’t document, we tend not to remember or anchor our lives –
it’s too easy to gloss over and forget. Journaling can be life changing, a
transformative tool all by itself.
I suggest that you give, and note what you’re giving, even though you want
to give without any sense of needing the money to come back from that source.
Also note what you’re receiving – keep a tally. Write down, “I gave so and so ____
amount of money today.”
After you do this, list what you’re grateful for that day. Maybe you’re
grateful for your cup of coffee or a safe commute to work. You might be grateful
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for your Miracles Coach, a pet, clothes, roof, phone, or computer – whatever it is,
make a list.
So it’s not only a gratitude journal. It’s an inventory of what you’re giving,
and a way to notice over time how everything’s changing. My guess is you’ll
discover that you’re giving even more, and that wonderful things are showing up,
very often unexpectedly.
Michelle:
In my journal, I always express gratitude for what I have been given, and I
also pray about my own physical To-Do list, the things I know I need Divine help
accomplishing that day.
At the end of the day, I go back over the list to see what I’ve accomplished,
and what the universe helped me to accomplish. When we take note of it, writing it
down regularly, it’s amazing to see how much we’ve accomplished and, therefore,
have to feel grateful for. It invigorates the soul.
Joe:
When you go back and re-read some of your journals, it will startle you. It’s
so easy to get caught up in day-to-day living and future pacing, always thinking
about what’s next.
So make it an intention journal, and a gratitude journal, and document all the
giving and receiving. This isn’t work. Make it fun, like a scientific experiment, see
what the results are and then report back.
Michelle:
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There’s a great article called “Why Giving Matters ” by Arthur Brooks
[http://speeches.byu.edu/?act=viewitem&id=1826], an economist and researcher,
who wanted to find statistical facts about the power of giving.
In the article, he discusses the happy results of giving, saying, “The more I
ran the numbers, the more I kept getting this crazy result. I kept getting the same
thing over and over and over. Rockefeller was right, but I still refused to believe
it.”
In complete disbelief and desperation, he decided to take it up with a fellow
colleague who “specialized in the psychology of charitable giving.” His friend
asked him why he didn’t believe that the results could be true, and suggested if he
was a Christian, he should. Brooks said, “…But I’m a social scientist. We’re not
supposed to believe those things. I need a more earthbound explanation.”
So his friend gave him one that, he said, psychology had been onto for 30
years: “We haven’t just been talking about money. You economists – you worry
about money all the time, and money is boring. We worry about something that
people really care about – the currency by which we really spend our days—and
that’s happiness. We’ve known for 30 years that people who give get happier as a
result. Can you use that?”
Joe:
That’s an amazing story, and I agree with it.
I’ve given away a lot of things in the last few years, everything from cars to
money to iPads, but there’s one thing I’ll never forget because of the feeling of
giving that came from it.
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I had bought an older Porsche, a 1989 Porsche S4 that had once belonged to
a friend of mine – in fact, he was the original owner. I poured a lot of money and
time into it, and kept thinking, “When this thing is all done and like new again, I’m
going to give it to my friend.” There was no rational reason for it. Although my
friend knew I’d bought the car, he didn’t ask for it, or even know I was working on
it.
When it was finished, I went over to their house, where I found out it was
his and his wife’s wedding anniversary. I said, “Well, I have a wedding present for
you.” I gave him the keys and the title. His wife started crying and he got redfaced. He didn’t know what to say.
I knew he had wanted it but couldn’t afford to buy it, let alone fix it up. And
as thrilled as they were to get it, I felt incredibly charged by doing it. I felt so good
and loving – it was the most wonderful feeling. It’s hard to express the joy I felt
inside giving him that car.
Jim Rohn once said, “Giving is better than receiving because giving starts
the receiving process.” When I gave that car, I wasn’t thinking of receiving – only
giving. But I tell you that, ever since then, I have received even more cars and
money. Wonderful things keep happening in my life, and I believe it’s a direct
result of the giving I’ve been able to do. I love being generous.
It’s probably no coincidence that we’re talking about this with Christmas
here for those of us who observe it – a time of giving and receiving. What a joyful
experience, and for that, Christmas should be every day.
Michelle:
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It seems that gratitude and giving go hand in hand, and that we can only
become a giving people if we learn to express gratitude – in that order. So if we
can learn to be grateful, we can learn to be a more giving people, with all the
amazing results that brings.
The article I quoted also mentions that one of the fringe benefits of giving is
it builds good leadership within us, citing a study done at the University of Kent in
Southern England.
Researchers divided people into groups, gave them money, and asked them
to donate all of it to a common fund. This fund was then matched, doubled, and
divided equally among all the participants.
In the next round, they were instructed to give whatever amount they
wanted, which would be matched, as well. That fund would, again, be divided
equally among everyone. Obviously, the best thing for everyone would be to put
all their money in, which some did. The crafty ones, however, kept their money
while others added theirs, so when it was divided they received a portion of that –
plus their own money.
At first, it seemed to work out for the stingy ones. But as Brooks went on to
say, “There was a second phase in which people in the game were asked to break
into teams and elect leaders. They found that in 82% of the cases, the leaders who
were elected were the biggest givers from the first phase.”
Joe:
And there’s the punch line.
Michelle:
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There are so many side benefits of giving we don’t know about, and often go
unrecognized – benefits that grow within us by giving.
Joe:
Elbert Hubbard said, “Love grows by giving. The love we give away is the
only love we keep. The only way to retain love is to give it away.”
I know that, in my case, giving changed my life. It allowed me to release
qualities like stubbornness, resistance, suspicion, and doubt, as well as
homelessness and poverty – all negative patterns of thinking and behavior.
Michelle:
What better time of year to put the law of the tithing and the law of giving
into action – even when we feel we don’t have anything to give? There are so
many gifts we can give in addition to money.
I am grateful for the opportunity to talk about this important topic. Thank
you, Joe, for sharing your time and knowledge with us.
Joe:
Thank you for choosing to make this conversation about giving, which is, of
itself, a giving thing to do. God speed, everyone.
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Secret Session #4
Joe Vitale with Adam Mortimer
Adam:
Joe, welcome! Thanks for being here to teach us how to take our lives to the
next level of success.
Joe:
Thank you, Adam. It's always great to be here.
To get started, would you mind doing what you're famous for and bring us
all into the moment with a gratitude exercise or meditation?
Adam:
Absolutely…I’ll just begin with what comes to mind.
I'm so grateful for this new day. I'm grateful for the wonderful mountains
outside my window and the fresh mountain air. I am grateful for the snow,
the beautiful scenery, and the opportunity I have to help free people from
their psychological chains. I'm grateful for the wonderful mysteries of the
universe that have been revealed to me. I'm grateful for the ability that I
have to relax completely and to let go of my limiting beliefs. I am grateful
for the freedom that this program has given me. I'm grateful for my
wonderful wife and family, my faith and my belief, and for the miracles that I
see each day. I am grateful for life.
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Joe:
I'm grateful for what you just said, and I'm grateful for this moment. I'm
grateful for you and everybody in Miracles Coaching™. There is much to be
grateful for. It feels good.
What can I offer today?
Adam:
Let’s talk about the idea of “Fake it ‘till you make it.” How would apply that
to someone with a food allergy?
For example, I had a student ask, “How do I fake it with a food allergy? I'm
allergic to chicken and eggs, so do I tell myself I’m not allergic? I’m always
having to do things like ask the restaurant if the food has anything in it, checking
packages to see if anything is written on it before buying, and explaining when I'm
invited somewhere why I'm not able to eat something.”
Can a person with allergies reprogram their mind that way?
Joe:
I think everybody can relate to this on some level, whether it's a food allergy
or something else.
First, you have to remind yourself that's your “current” reality because, as I
wrote about in The Attractor Factor, your current reality will change. It's going to
change on its own, but you can accelerate the change and help move it in the
direction you want it to go.
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The question this person asks presupposes they’re not going to change.
They’re saying, “Well, I have this food allergy and I'm always going to, so how the
heck do I get around having this food allergy and pretend that I don't have it?”
Your mind set is determining what you have, so you want to project yourself
into the future where you don't have the food allergy. Maybe you went on a fast,
found some herbs, or an alternative healer. Somehow, you got rid of the food
allergies, which is entirely possible. People get rid of food allergies all the time –
it's not something your DNA is programmed to have for eternity.
So, project yourself into a future time when you don't have the food
allergies. What is your life like then? What are you ordering for meals? You’d be
consciously choosing whatever feels good to you and your body in that moment,
without worry or stress because, in this future, you’re past that.
What you're doing now is pretending you’re already that future you, where
your mindset is, “Oh, this is resolved, I feel great. I have no allergies at this point.
I'm totally healthy and well. I eat what I want, I enjoy what I want, and all is well.”
Some of it’s a mind game because, yes, in this present moment, you might
have to be aware of your food sensitivities or food allergies, but you realize a
miracle is about to take place and you won't have those food sensitivities or
allergies anymore. That's the mindset to pretend you're in.
When I say, “Act as if,” I mean to act as if you're already there. Act as if
you've already attracted the very being you want to be, or the physical body that
you want to be in.
Adam:
It’s a question of which reality you want to believe in.
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Do you want to be in the one where you're stuck or would you rather bridge
the gap between the present and future? The only way to do that is with faith, but it
sounds like there's a lot of doubt and fear in this person’s question, as though they
don’t believe they're ever going to be able to overcome it. I've never seen a miracle
with someone full of doubt and fear, so you have to say, “You know what? I can
take my life to the next level if I simply bridge the gap through faith.” That’s when
it can happen, although bringing that future to the present is sometimes the hardest
part.
How do you get over a belief when current reality seems so real? You've got
to reject the current reality and go for the future you want, and you do that with
faith.
Joe:
It's interesting you use the word “faith,” because later this year I have a new
book coming out with that exact title – Faith.
Adam:
That's exciting news!
Joe:
Yes, and it ties in to what you just said, that faith is the answer.
Are you giving your power to this moment of negativity and the things you
don't want, or are you giving your power to what you're creating and what you do
want? It's a mind shift – but you can do it, and faith is at the core of it.
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Adam:
We definitely live in a faith and belief driven universe, so if we can't believe,
then we cannot activate the forces of the universe to bring about a miracle.
Joe:
I do want to mention that, as a side note, if someone’s interested in learning
more about food allergies and sensitivities, my partner, Nerissa, specializes in this
area. She's got a website dedicated to resolving issues once and for all, which you
can visit at www.FoodPowers.com
This site gives free information, leads, and direction on overcoming food
allergies and food sensitivities naturally, easily, quickly.
Adam:
What can someone do who is struggling with their health and wants to see it
improve faster?
One student said they’ve been meditating, but it didn’t seem to be helping.
Are they just stuck with being ill?
Joe:
No, they’re not stuck with an illness.
What’s happening is their impatience is coming to the forefront of their
awareness, the key issue in why it’s not resolved right now. He’s implying, “This
isn't working fast enough for me. What do I need to do to make it work faster? I'm
meditating and doing whatever else I'm doing here, but it hasn't happened yet. How
do I make it happen now?”
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The subtext communicated through the question reveals a level of
impatience. Where's the impatience coming from? Most likely from a belief that
says, “I don't really believe this stuff works. I don't really believe meditation
works. I'm not so sure anything I'm doing or trying is ever going to work. I might
actually be destined to having this problem forever.”
Remember, everything we're getting comes to us because of our beliefs, but
most of the time, 95% or more, those beliefs are totally unconscious. We're
oblivious to it, and this is why we end up asking questions like, “I'm doing
meditation, how come I'm still sick?”
The meditation is obviously working by bringing to the surface the thing
that's bothering you the most, which is your impatience, held in the thought, “It's
not happening for me yet.” So explore why the impatience is there.
Relying on your Miracles Coach and sharing what's going on is important.
You can reveal the beliefs, release, and erase them, and then you'll say, “Oh, I don't
even remember being sick.” The health issue will be gone and you won't even have
a memory of it. That's when you know it's totally resolved.
Adam:
It goes back to a lack of faith in the healing process, and learning to focus on
the right things versus focusing on what you don't want.
Sometimes that's the big issue in helping students. How do you get them to
stop focusing on what they don't want in order to create a new reality they want?
That may be the most important thing we do.
Joe:
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There's a 5-step formula in The Attractor Factor and the first step is: Know
What You Don't Want.
When people say, “I'm still sick,” or “People at work are bothering me,” it's
okay to say it. This might seem odd, but you need to know what you don't want.
Just don't stay there.
The second step is: Declare What You Do Want. Take what you don't want
and state it in the 180-degree opposite. If you're tired of meditation not making you
heal instantly, turn it around and say, “What I want is to be healed as quickly and
easily as possible in the fastest way possible,” which could through meditation, or
something else that comes along to you.
Whatever it is that you don't want, acknowledge it just enough to be able to
restate your intention. Now you’ll be going in the direction of manifesting it
because you attract whatever it is you focus on. As long as you focus on what you
don't want, you're going to be stuck in that energy. You'll keep complaining about
it and questioning it – it’s a downward cycle. The bottom line is you'll keep
yourself there.
As you start to go in the direction of the new intention, you'll think, act, and
feel differently. New experiences, people, and solutions will come to you almost
magically. You'll just stumble across them. Somebody will mention something to
you and it will be the exact thing at the right moment. But the way you start is by
taking your attention off what you don't want and putting it on what you do want.
Adam:
You’ve mentioned before that you can’t change anybody. Does clearing
force people to change or does it give them the opportunity to change?
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And, if the Divine allows people to make their own decisions, how exactly
does clearing the energy within me clear the energy in others?
Joe:
Clearing doesn't change anybody else. In Ho’oponopono, the Hawaiian
healing method I wrote about in my book, Zero Limits, there are actually no other
people in the outer world. They are projections of what's in you.
Interestingly, Hawaiian philosophy doesn't use the word “projection.” They
say that when you see a problem, or you have a problem with somebody, it isn't the
other person. The other person in many ways doesn't exist. They're essentially a
projection or illusion, mirroring what's in you.
The fundamental turning point is when you realize that everything you
experience is in you, and you understand that, when you change you, it will appear
that other people have changed. But they didn't change at all. You changed and so
your perception has changed.
Dr. Hew Len, my co-author, was the therapist who worked with the group of
mentality ill criminals at the Hawaii state hospital. He didn't go around changing
patients, nor did he work one on one with them. He worked the system, looking at
their files and noting what he felt inside himself.
As he cleared what he felt inside, those patients who appeared to be on the
outside got better. This is why that ward had such a success rate of helping people
who were essentially thrown away and considered hopeless, with no way to heal
them. He was able to make that change – but he didn't change them, he changed
himself.
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Whenever you look “out there” and see your family, friends, co-workers, or
your spouse, ask yourself, “Where do I experience the problem?” You experience it
in you – the problem is not outside. It's inside because there’s nothing on the
outside. This is so important to understand to have a better life that I wrote a song
about the nature of projection called Strut, which is on one of my recent CDs.
If you want to change anybody, which is not even an accurate way of saying
it, don't look at them, look at you. Dr. Hew Len used to ask the question, “Have
you ever noticed when there's a problem, you are there?” It's because you are the
one experiencing the problem.
In order to get rid of any problem, whether you consider it coming from the
outside or not, you don't change the outside. Change the inside, change you. So use
clearing for yourself, not for changing someone else.
Adam:
My next question is about work. What do you suggest when people at work
are rude and disrespectful to someone, or overly controlling and difficult?
Joe:
I've been there, and there are at least two ways to think about this.
One is that you train people how to respond or react to you through your
own behavior, which stems from your thoughts about yourself. You’re teaching
people how to treat you, which is hard for some people to hear. They think, “Well,
they're beating me up and I'm not training them to do that.” But, in some way, you
are. You're sending out a signal and inviting that in on an unconscious level.
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This is what makes Miracles Coaching™ somewhat priceless, because we’re
exploring deeper issues we can't always see by ourselves. It’s serving us on this
unseen, unconscious, belief-driven level.
All we see is the end result and then we blame others for it. We blame the
people at work. We blame our coworkers, bosses, supervisors, or whoever it
happens to be, but blame isn't going to help you because it’s coming from being a
victim.
In The Awakening Course, I talk about four stages. The first stage is the
level of this kind of question, and isn't actually a stage of awakening at all because
you’re being a victim – you're asleep. Victim mentality isn’t going to help you. If
anything, it's going to make you feel bad, and keep you from growing or attracting
miracles.
So look at this idea that you’re training people how to treat you. Start to love
yourself so much that it exudes from you. They’ll begin to feel that energy, and
turn around and love you. It’s not about changing other people. You can't change
them, but you can inspire them. You can be a model for them.
The vibe you're sending out is causing what you're seeing, so change the
vibe inside yourself.
Adam:
It really boils down to the way you view yourself – it's all about your selfimage.
You send out messages based upon what you believe subconsciously, and
that energy comes through to other people. Ninety-five percent of communication
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is your body language and tonality, all based on the thoughts you're thinking about
yourself.
Think highly of yourself and others will think more highly of you. It's a
universal law. It has always worked this way, and it will continue. Raise your own
vibration, and other people will mirror that.
This gets us into the Law of Attraction. Can you tell us how much of this is
in your mind, and how much of it is the universe?
Joe:
There's no difference.
That’s like saying, “How much of the law of gravity is in your mind and
how much is out there in the universe?” It's one and the same. You are the
universe. The mind is the universe. There's no division or differential.
Adam:
People get into trouble trying to separate themselves and universe, because
we’re connected and part of the whole. We’re one with it.
Joe:
A spiritual teacher, Jacquelyn Small, said, “A way to understand is to spell
the word universe – y-o-u-n-i-v-e-r-s-e – that way you can see that you (y-o-u) is in
universe.
You are the universe.
Adam:
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What is the nature of the energy we send out to the universe? Is it light
waves or sound waves, some type of energy waves?
Joe:
I'm not a quantum physicist or a scientist, so I can’t answer it in specifics.
As a metaphysician, coach, author, and speaker, I see it as an invisible energy.
Studies show that even when we are thinking 2,000 miles away, we can
influence an object in another state, or on the other side of the continent. What is
that? A light vibration? Sound? Pure thought? I don't really know, I just know it's
energy. You can feel it, use it, bend it, will it, and experience it. All of it.
Adam:
It's debatable among scientists, too. We just know it exists.
It’s like a car. You don't need to know exactly how a catalytic converter
works in order to drive. You know how to open the door, turn the wheel, and start
the car. You’ve got a gas pedal and brakes.
You just need to know the basics. Beyond that, you don't need to get into the
technicalities.
Joe:
That’s a great analogy because I just bought an all-electric car and feel like
I'm driving a 5,000 pound computer. I'm used to cars with transmissions and gear
shifts, and this doesn't have those. It has a steering wheel, which I know about, and
a pedal, but it's not a gas pedal because there's no gas.
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When I want to drive, all I do is hit a button marked "D" for drive and
suddenly it's ready to move, but I have no idea how or why. If somebody asked me,
“How does the energy conversion work?” I would have to say, “I have no idea. All
I know is I'm going to the store, and going to hit 'D.' I'll see you in fifteen
minutes.” That's it! I can use it but I can't explain it.
Adam:
We could say to people, “Don't worry about it – just push the 'D' button
already.”
Joe:
Just push the "D" button – I love it.
Focus on what you want and take inspired action on the opportunities that
show up in your mind or on the outside, that’s the equivalent of pushing the "D"
button.
Adam:
What would you say is the best way to have peace in your soul?
Joe:
The best way I know is to realize it’s already there.
Your soul isn't restless; it's the mind that's restless. Sometimes the body has
all kinds of stresses accumulated in it, but the soul is peace – you are peace. All
that’s required is to recognize it's there, and the best way is probably through some
form of meditation and relaxation. In simply breathing and following your breath,
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you can separate your awareness from the thoughts flying, and from whatever your
body is trying to do to adjust and feel more at ease.
Behind the thoughts, emotions, and body – all that’s buzzing around – is
what some teachers refer to as “the witness.” Call it the soul, the essence of life, or
your connection to God, it’s the heart of peace. The core of you is at peace, and it’s
our duty, challenge, or opportunity, depending on how you look at it, to feel that
peace. Since it's already here, we can quiet ourselves to actually feel it and
experience it.
In fact, I'm doing this as I'm talking. My experience is, “Wow, this moment
is pretty incredible. I love these questions. I love Adam's energy and his responses
and the additions he's giving.” As I feel that this moment is fantastic, a miracle, my
soul is at rest right here in this moment. It's when we wander off with our thoughts
and get carried away with the monkey mind that we say, “How do I find peace?
How do I get peace?” And all the time, it's here.
Adam:
The soul's balance state is peace.
When we're at balance, we're at peace. I coach many students into this place
quite rapidly, and it's sometimes shocking to them because they haven't felt it in so
long. It's not abnormal to feel peace – it's abnormal not to feel peace.
Joe:
Yes, that's the natural state, and it's available for each of us now.
Adam:
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Is it true that emotions activate the Law of Attraction, and is there a way to
increase our emotions? For example, can we Nevellize for this?
Joe:
Yes, emotions are the leverage. They’re like a gas pedal, and the way to
increase them is by focusing on the love, passion, and joy in whatever it is that
you're trying to attract or achieve.
Nevelle Goddard, who I wrote about in The Attractor Factor and some of
my other books, encouraged people to focus on the end result. He said to imagine
you've already attracted the miracle you're longing for, to experience it in your
mind and in your body as though it's already here.
When you do, notice those aren't feelings of unhappiness, heaviness, or
sadness, but rather feelings of bliss, joy, passion, and love – and you increase them
by focusing on them. As you associate those emotions with the thing that you’re
attracting, and imagine you've already attracted it, you continue to up the wattage.
In other words, you can push the "D" button, and get there even faster.
Adam:
NLP (Neuro-Lingistic Programing) can help turn up the emotional response,
too. For example, you can make images bigger, brighter, and closer, and you can
add sounds, increase the volume, or speed everything up.
Another basic of the Law of Attraction seems to be that we live in a thinking
universe – it is us. Would you say all things are made up of thought substance or
intelligence, and that we’re inherently connected through this universal thought
substance that fills the universe?
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Joe:
Yes, we are the cells and the planets – and we are thinking it is thinking.
Adam:
It's definitely easier to understand how the Law of Attraction works when
you break everything down to energy,
I’ve noticed in coaching that some students struggle with staying positive.
One person said, “I feel like the older I get, the less time I have to think. It makes it
harder to stay balanced.” Do you have any suggestions for staying positive more
consistently?
Joe:
Sometimes thinking is the booby prize.
You can overthink, and the truth is, you don’t need to understand everything.
I don't know that anybody who can actually explain the universe so that a thinking
person, or all thinking people, can agree on what it is. Everyone seems to think
differently.
When you trust your connection to life, to God, or the universe – it overrides
thinking. Thinking is actually supposed to serve our connection to the universe,
and lead us into Divine feelings, which then direct us to where miracles will hatch
for us.
We do this by tuning in to our connection through a quieting of the mind, so
we feel the peace of our soul. From there, we can feel the nudge to do what is next
for us.
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I'm not dismissing thinking because I enjoy thinking. I’m a thinker and read
a lot. But, while I may speculate on different things, I am much more in favor of
feeling my connection to the Divine, and following the orders it's giving me.
Adam:
There’s a great trick in NLP that works like magic for things like this.
Any time you catch a limiting belief such as, “I don’t have time to think,” try
saying it in a falsetto voice, like Mickey Mouse. Usually you'll start chuckling and
laughing, which helps to reframe it, "Wait a minute, I don't have time to think,
really? You know, that’s pretty silly. I do have time to think.”
You can eliminate a limiting belief just by saying it differently.
Joe:
Yes, contrast helps, especially when someone is confused whether a thought
is a limiting belief or an inspiration because they’re not detached enough.
Writing it down is one way to separate yourself from the thought so that you
can see the difference, and saying it out loud helps you hear it – especially if you
do it in a Mickey Mouse voice. That’s a great idea.
Adam:
What would you say to someone who wants to stay positive and in the
moment, but has kids or family that is constantly getting on their nerves, and feels
that the only time they find peace is when they’re alone – which they never seem
to have?
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Joe:
Like we talked about earlier, there’s nobody on the outside.
When you blame your family or friends – something outside yourself – for
your disturbance, you’re in a victim state of mind, throwing your power to nothing.
When you come from empowerment, you realize you’re attracting this for
unconscious reasons, and you go inside to find and release them.
As I said before, you teach people how to respond to you. If they’re getting a
reaction by being noisy or interrupting, then you’ve attracted it. In fact, on some
level, you probably want it. For example, could it be you’re looking for an excuse
not to do your work? You have to look at all of the belief dynamics going on.
When you’re empowered, you’re better able to love and appreciate all the
people in your life, even if they’re making a ruckus and you can't get a particular
job done. The point is you've got a family, so, by God, love them. This will
transmute what's going on within you, and, on a practical level, allow you to set
boundaries. You may decide to create an office in your home or somewhere else
where you can have quiet time.
While there are different levels for doing this, I’ve found the most powerful
one is examining beliefs about your work, yourself, and your family. When you
resolve those, you'll find that you can work and have peace anywhere.
There are plenty of people who manage to work and write in places like
coffee shops, or the airport, even with all the possible distractions of other people
wandering around, talking on their phones, typing on their computers, playing
videos games, and ordering food. Somehow they get work done.
Adam:
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It boils down to making time, creating a set time where you're going to
meditate or have quiet time. You don't just wish for it to magically appear because
it won't. You've got to make it happen.
Joe:
Yes, and make sure you're focusing on what you want to have come into
your life.
What do you want to have, do, or be? Focusing on that is going to bring it to
you. Remember – just push the "D" button.
Adam:
I love it. Thanks so much for being here, Joe. Our conversations are always
intellectually stimulating.
Joe:
Thank you, Adam, and God speed.
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Secret Session #5
Joe Vitale with Janeen Detrick
Janeen:
Joe, thank you for being here today.
Joe:
I always love gathering together with people who are going for magic and
miracles in their lives. We’re doing wonderful things. What a wonderful time to be
alive!
Would you lead us through a brief meditation, or gratitude moment, to let go
of any stresses or distractions, so we’re all centered and here in this moment where
the point of power is?
Janeen:
Yes, I’d be happy to.
I noticed the stress on the word brief, do you think I can do that?
Joe:
We don’t want any stress at all, so you can do brief or long, however you
want to do it.
Janeen:
Bless your heart, that’s precious. You’re so conscious.
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For this gratitude moment, anchoring meditation, I am choosing a beautiful
pottery bowl I have beside me, because I like to select something in my immediate
surroundings to offer gratitude for, to raise my vibration in gratitude.
Thank you, bowl, for being in my life and for being present in this
corner of my desk to brighten and beautify this corner of my life. I am so
deeply appreciative of your rich red, which reminds me of manifestation and
the root chakra. I appreciate your red color, beautiful little pottery bowl.
Thank you for reminding me how connected to the earth we are as I
think about the clay, which the potter utilized to mold and shape you,
beautiful pottery bowl.
Thank you for holding these healing gemstones and rocks that
resonate with vibration, which I so appreciate, enjoy, and feel. I am very
appreciative that you are here in my life, little pottery bowl.
Thank you to the potter. Thank you for adding your energy to this
bowl so that I can have this pottery bowl beautifying the corner of my desk.
I appreciate you for crafting this with love and for bringing that love into my
life every day as I look at this beautiful pottery bowl. Thank you. Thank you
for this moment and how I feel my vibration rise to that of gratitude as I hold
you in my awareness.
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
Joe:
You do that so well. I feel really centered in this moment.
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Janeen:
The gratitude moment, anchoring meditation is one of my favorite things to
do to bring myself back to this moment.
Joe:
Gratitude is the single most powerful thing you can do in any moment to
transform yourself and your surroundings. And it’s so simple.
Just look for anything in the moment like you did with the bowl, anything
that you can sincerely begin to feel gratitude for. As you explore and deepen it,
you’ll feel your whole body, mind, outlook, perspective, and paradigm change.
Your next moments will then be even more beautiful because now you’re going to
be attracting more things, more experiences, more moments to be grateful for.
It all stems from gratitude and you can do that at any moment, it’s free.
Janeen:
That is a wonderful reminder to us all, to take a deep breath, and settle into
the gratitude.
Let’s talk about guilt, something many of our students struggle with because
they can’t think of something “worthy enough” to be their life’s mission. Do you
think it’s selfish for someone’s life’s mission to be about enjoying their life rather
than, say, saving the whales?
In other words, isn’t spending money automatically blessing other people
and giving? After all, it blesses the people you buy things from and it creates jobs.
Joe:
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I don’t think you need to save the whales; you just need to do what the
passion is in you to do. As you do your passion you will enjoy your life and you
will contribute your piece of the puzzle to the universe at large.
Decades ago I gave a talk in Houston and at the beginning I passed out a
jigsaw puzzle. I asked everybody to take just one piece of the puzzle. When the
box came back to me, it was empty and I said, “Look at the piece of the puzzle you
have in your hand. Do you know what that is contributing to? Do you know what
the end result is going to be by adding your piece to all the other pieces?”
They had no clue because they couldn’t see the cover of the box. I still had
the cover of the box. Life is like that. When you contribute your piece of the puzzle
and I contribute my piece of the puzzle, we all make this wonderful masterpiece
we call a world that works.
For some people, it’ll be their piece of the puzzle to save the whales and for
others, their piece of the puzzle will be to be a good mom and raise their kids in a
loving, conscious, aware, and healing way. For somebody else, their piece of the
puzzle will be to write a cookbook.
Everybody has a piece of the puzzle. You might call it your calling, you
might call it your life passion, you might call it your life work, or you might feel
like you’re on a mission from God. It doesn’t mean necessarily you’re going to end
world poverty or go to Africa and make the economy work, or clean up the
Mississippi River. You just do what’s right for you to do and as you do it you will
enjoy your life.
As I’m writing songs these days for my next CD, I am feeling that this is my
calling. Obviously I’m still an author – I speak, I travel, I do calls like this, but I
also feel that when I write a song, I’m putting into it all of my life, my passion, my
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energy, everything. I feel called to do it and as I do it, I could end up changing
some people because of a three minute song.
So whatever it is that’s coming up from you in your life, you don’t need to
judge it as not being grand enough because it’s as not a save-the-whales kind of a
concept. It doesn’t need to be that. You just do your piece of the puzzle – whatever
that happens to be. It might be taking care of your family, your friends, or doing
something at your church community. I don’t know what it is, but you probably do.
As far as spending money, yes, you are absolutely already blessing people.
Money needs to be in circulation, so when you’re spending money, you’re helping
it to circulate. As it circulates, it’s going to be touching different lives, giving jobs,
helping entrepreneurs, and keeping business going. When you spend money,
you’re doing wonderful things for yourself and the world. That’s great, and God’s
speed to you, but don’t forget to give. Sometimes people see the blessing from
spending, but not from giving.
I’ve written entire books on this. My book, The Greatest Money-Making
Secret in History! was all about giving in order to help the world and, ultimately,
for you to receive. In Attract Money Now, I also talk about it being one of the
seven steps for attracting money.
You can’t overlook giving. When you don’t give, you actually shut down
your ability to receive the wonders and the magic and the miracles that the
universe is trying to give to you.
A friend of mine often says that the window you create in your life to
receive through is made bigger by how much you give, and this means the more
you give of money. You can give time, energy, services, and all that’s great, too,
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but a lot of people try to dodge this idea of giving money, and I want to make sure
that nobody’s skipping out on this because it’s a reality in the laws of the universe.
It’s like a Divine law that the more you give the more you open up yourself
to receive. Spending is good, so spend it wisely and consciously. It helps
everybody, including yourself – but also give money. Wherever you get your
spiritual nourishment and inspiration, give money there, whether that’s your
church or minister, a waiter or bus driver, an author or speaker, or even a Miracles
Coach.
Janeen:
People contribute to making the world a wonderful place by doing whatever
is their passion.
So it’s actually unselfish to do that?
Joe:
Yes, you’re supposed to do your passion and your passion is that piece of the
puzzle.
You’re not here to save the planet. You’re here to save whatever it is that
your passion says. Maybe you love being a waiter or waitress. Do the best job
humanly possible and enjoy it if that’s your passion. That’s your calling. That’s
what you’re doing for now. If that’s not it, look within yourself or talk to your
Miracles Coach to get clarity about what you really want to do.
One way is to look at the idea of what would you do if you weren’t afraid.
What would you do if you weren’t afraid of what people thought? What would you
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do if you weren’t afraid about money? What would you do if you weren’t afraid
about the future or failure or repercussions?
That’s going to take you in the direction of what’s fun for you, what your
passion is, and what your life calling is. Maybe for some people it’s save the
whales and God speed to them if that’s the case. But, for you, it could be
something really different and unique…but it’s yours.
Janeen:
It’s almost as if you alleviated the pressure to perform for and on behalf of
other people, or only thinking about other people.
Joe:
No one should be motivated by guilt.
Your motivation should be love and passion, so that when you look within
yourself, you’re not asking, “What should I do?” which comes more from a guilt
mindset. Instead, the question you want to ask is, “What would I love to do? What
am I excited to do? What would I do whether I was paid or not? What do I
actually feel like it’s my calling to do?”
These are the kind of questions that’ll lead you in the right direction. You’ll
feel the glow of life, the gusto, and you’ll have a spring in your step because
you’re doing what’s right for you.
Janeen:
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So your encouragement to all of us to dare something worthy does not mean
that you have to put yourself under some kind of obligation to do something you
don’t love for or on behalf of other people. It’s just you doing what you love.
Joe:
Yes, daring something worthy simply means to stretch yourself. It means,
“What would you do if you weren’t afraid of all these other things that come up in
your consciousness?”
It doesn’t mean go and conquer another planet. It doesn’t even mean doing
something that scares you or doesn’t feel right at all. A big goal might make you a
little bit jittery, but it’ll make you more excited than anything else. That’s the
direction you want to go in.
Dare something worthy means doing what it is for you to do here – follow
your calling, do it with love, do it with passion and raise the bar. Do it better than
anybody else has ever done it, but do it as it pertains to you, not anybody else.
Janeen:
Do it because you love it, not because you feel obligated.
When it comes to giving, you hear in many spiritual traditions that it has to
be 10%. Is that a universal number or should the amount you give be based on
what you feel you want to give?
Joe:
10% shows up in all kinds of spiritual traditions and books, so I’d go with
that.
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You can give more and some people do, but I would caution people that, if
you give less than 10%, it seems to me you would be telling yourself negative,
limiting, poverty-oriented statements.
For example, you might be saying, “Well, I don’t have enough money this
week, so I’ll only give five percent, but I’ll make up for it next week.” Or, “I’m
worried about my job, so I want to put more in savings, rather than give ten percent
away.” You have to look really closely at these statements because they could be
self-deception.
As best as humanly possible, go with the 10% rule. That doesn’t mean you
have to give it all to one place. You can break it up into giving two percent to
somebody who inspired you, and 8% to somebody else or some organization,
anything like that. This is a sensitive subject because I don’t know that anything’s
written in stone, but looking at all the different traditions, they all seem to come
down to that 10%, so use it as a rule of thumb.
You still have to weigh all of this with what feels right to you and what is
appropriate to you and your family, but on my end, I’m going to hold you to the
fire a little bit and say do the 10%. It’ll open you and you’ll get the experience
better. The money will come back faster, but you have to do what’s right for you.
It’s not a law and you don’t have to do it.”
Janeen:
So challenge why you’d be unwilling to give 10%.
Joe:
Yes, you want to look at that.
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I was interviewed recently and they said, “What about people who don’t
have much money, is it okay for them to give their services? Can they go and
volunteer someplace?” I said, “Yes, you can give your services. Yes, you can
donate your time, but it’s a cop out to think you can’t give money, too.”
You always have money. If it’s a dollar, give a dime. It’s so easy for us to
con ourselves. In fact, we con ourselves sooner than anybody else because we do it
on this unconscious level. We don’t even see we’re doing it. We rationalize what
we’re doing and we say, “I don’t have the money so I’m going to keep my five
dollars to myself.” No, no, no, you really have to awaken. I believe that’s the goal
of life – to awaken to our Divinity and power – and one way to do it is to watch
what we’re telling ourselves.
Watch what you’re doing in your actions and make sure that this is coming
from the highest spiritual, most loving place. If somebody has a dollar and they say
they can’t give it away, they’re lying to themselves because they could give 10%
of it. They can afford the dime.
Again, it’s all up to you. I’m asking you to look at your thoughts, beliefs,
and behavior. The good news is if you do this with a Miracles Coach, you’ve got
leverage. You can get clear.
Janeen:
So it’s about your power, something we work on at Miracles Coaching™.
One of our students asked, “The ego lies to me and tells me I’m powerless,
then I feel weak. I choose to feel powerful, however, I don’t feel it when I simply
say, ‘I am powerful.’ How can I start feeling it? I can’t Nevillize if I can’t feel.”
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Do you have any ideas on how a person can overcome powerlessness and
begin to feel powerful?
Joe:
If you notice the language in that question, they’re talking about a voice
that’s talking to them and they’re listening to it, which suggests they’re separate
from the voice.
In other words, when that person says, “My ego tells me I am powerless,”
the “I” that she’s referring to is her power source – and she’s saying, “My ego tells
me.” No, the “me” in that sentence is your power source and you have choice. You
can listen to whatever you’re calling your ego and what it’s telling you – or you
can just say, “Oh, there’s that old programming still chattering. I’ll have to talk to
my Miracles Coach about the best way to delete that.” Then you’re separate from
it.
The key here is that we all have these little voices in our head, or subpersonalities, according to psychology. You might call one of those subpersonalities your ego, one of them a complainer, another your cheerleader even,
but who’s the person who experiences all of the sub-personalities? That’s your
core, what some traditions call the “witness” that is your source of power.
The more you can identify with this witness, this source of power, the more
you’ll realize that these voices you hear are just programs that came throughout
your life. You were born and as you started to hear your parents, maybe they said
you were powerless. Or perhaps you heard it in school. Somewhere you heard it
and started to believe it. You created a sub-personality, but that’s not you. You are
still separate from it.
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As a type of meditation, sit quietly and, as you’re listening to those voices
going on in your head, at a certain point you’ll realize you are not your voices, you
are not your thoughts, you are not your feelings. In fact, you’re not even your
body. You are in all of this and experiencing all of this. You identify and realize
that you’re the witness, the core, or the background to all of this.
In some traditions, they say thoughts are like clouds that go by in your
awareness, but your awareness is the sky. When you start to realize you’re the sky
behind all of this, now you’re closer to feeling and being one with that source of
power. Instead of wrestling with the voices, just realize, “Oh, they’re just kids
mouthing off and I don’t have to take that.”
Janeen:
So we’re empowered to simply make a choice, not to listen to that voice.
Joe:
Yes, and, in fact, you can create a cheerleader if you want.
Many of us have critical voices that say things like, “You can’t do that,
you’re dumb, you’re powerless,” or, “That’s dumb.” We all hate that. We’ve all
heard that, but you can turn it off.
In my own case, I either turned it off or got rid of it because I now have a
voice that says, “You can do that, go for it, Joe, you can learn anything.” A year
ago I didn’t play guitar, I didn’t write songs – and now I’ve got three CDs and a
fourth one coming out. How’d I do this? It’s because I have a cheerleader that is
urging me on. If there’s any negativity, I take a glance at it and say, “Oh, you’re
not welcome here,” and let it go.
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Treat it as a meditation. Don’t be hard on yourself. Just relax, breathe, and
gently experience whatever you’re thinking, feeling, and believing. Notice that
you’re experiencing all of them, but you aren’t them. You’re separate from it. This
is a tremendously freeing insight. It empowers you. You are free when you realize
that you are not those thoughts, or that it’s your ego.
Janeen:
So we can simply disassociate from those voices, rather than all the other
processes we go through to try and tame the voices in our heads. This seems so
much easier.
Joe:
As I wrote in The Awakening Course, we want to get to the point where we
realize we are this Divinity.
You’re actually spirit or source – the witness. You’re not the thoughts you
think. You’re separate from them. You observe them for a reason. You observe
them because you’re not them.
Janeen:
That’s very freeing.
Can we apply this to health? We have a student who has a chronic health
issue going on and has asked for ideas on how to heal their arthritis.
Joe:
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The basis of everything I do and teach is the five steps in The Attractor
Factor.
The first step is to know what you don’t want. That’s useful information. In
this case you’d say, “I have arthritis, I don’t want it.” The second step is to declare
your intention. Turn your first step, what you said you don’t want, 180 degrees
around and declare a very clear intention. “I want to be able to walk without pain,”
or “I want to be able to be healthy and happy and doing whatever it is that I feel
like doing at any particular moment.”
You want to state it in the positive, so stay away from the word arthritis,
which can be loaded for people. You don’t want to say, “I want to get rid of my
arthritis,” because then you’re still dealing with a negative statement. You want to
make a very clear statement about radiant health, happiness, freedom of
movement, or whatever the phrase is. The intention is what that person needs to
declare, and it needs to be something that resonates with him or her.
As soon as you declare that intention, heaven and earth will begin to move to
help you achieve it. You’ll run into people, books, courses, doctors, therapists, or a
certain therapy, or maybe you’ll discover something on the internet. The point is
that something will come along that’ll help you resolve the issue. Your new
intention will take you in the direction of fulfilling it.
But, if you keep thinking about arthritis, you’re going to keep pulling in
experiences that reinforce what you’re thinking about. That’s the nature of the Law
of Attraction. So in step two, declare your intention.
The third step is to get clear, which means getting clear of any beliefs that
may come up. Because, once you declare something new, you’ll have thoughts
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like, “Oh, that’s not possible. There’s no cure for arthritis. It’ll never happen for
me. I’m too old. I’m too fat. I’m too thin. I’m too whatever.”
All of those are limiting negative beliefs. Sometimes releasing them is as
easy as saying, “Do I really believe that that’s not possible? Do I really believe it’s
not possible to heal myself of arthritis?” You might answer, “No, I actually believe
it’s possible,” and you’re done. If it seems to hang on, talk to your Miracles Coach.
You have an ally here, somebody to help you get through this.
The fourth step is Nevillize your goal. Visualize yourself already walking
and moving. Do your intention as if it’s already come to pass. It’s not in the future,
it’s now. You are healed, you are walking, you’re dancing, singing, whatever it is
that you want to do that shows you no longer have arthritis.
In the fifth step, it’s all about letting go and taking inspired action. You have
to let go of any addiction, attachment, or feeling of dependence regarding this
intention, or needing it to work out right now, this minute.
Trust and have faith. Big words, I know. Trust and have faith that you’re in
the process of the healing, and then take inspired action on any intuitions or
opportunities that come to you. If you get inspired to go on Google and type in
arthritis or arthritic cure, do it. You might find there’s something there that’ll be
particularly useful to you.
By following these five steps, and especially working with your Miracles
Coach at the same time, you can be lead to the very remedy that you’re looking
for. In fact, you might even be the person that actually comes up with a remedy.
With your intention and clearing, you might actually create or generate some sort
of way to heal it. You could become an entrepreneur who’s selling that very same
cure to others. Just know there’s always a way.
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Janeen:
They could find the remedy and get rich.
Joe:
Why not? It’s possible.
Janeen:
So looking for the solution can be potentially profitable – even a part of
what helps them to accomplish their life goals.
Joe:
The experience they have with arthritis could be one of the greatest gifts
they’ve ever experienced.
Janeen:
That’s a beautiful way to think of it because then you’re not against it.
You’re not angry that you have arthritis.
Joe:
Right, you don’t want to argue with your reality.
Arguing with your reality just creates a friction. No matter what the issue,
whether it’s money, health, or romance, you don’t want to argue with it. You face
current reality, and then ask yourself, “How would I like it to be?” From there you
can start to move in the direction of creating your new reality, but fighting with the
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current one will just put you in stress, make you unhappy, generate really low
feelings, and your energy will drop.
The Law of Attraction will still kick in and you’ll attract moments more of
what you don’t want. You want to attract the moments of magic and miracles. So
focus on, “How do I want it to be? I know what this reality is, how do I want it to
be?” and start to move in that new direction.
Janeen:
Focusing on what you currently have – arthritis – and being mad about it
will only create more anger and more arthritis.
Joe:
It might even be worth asking, “What’s the gift in this? What is the great gift
that I haven’t acknowledged?”
Janeen:
The emotional body manifests whatever it’s holding onto in our physical
bodies, so if the emotional body is holding any kind of rigidity, then it would
manifest as rigid joints.
Joe:
That’s a very good point.
Janeen:
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As a coach, I would ask them, “Are you holding on to one right way to be,
some kind of rigidity in your life?” Maybe they may have an unforgiving attitude
towards someone.
In Hinduism, there is a thought process that says grace that is unearned, or
undeserved favor of the universe, flows through the parents. Your health flows
from the mother’s line and your finances flow from the father’s line. Following
that line of thinking, someone with arthritis could ask, “How do I feel toward my
mother and everyone on my mother’s side of the family?” See if there’s anything
they’re holding onto that would keep their joints rigid.
Joe:
Anything that helps people explore their inner world is going to be priceless.
You mentioned forgiveness. I believe it was Wayne Dyer who said, “If there
is a lack anywhere in your life, it is due to a lack of forgiveness.” Forgiveness isn’t
just about forgiving others – more powerfully, it’s usually forgiving yourself.
When you forgive yourself for any perceived wrongdoing or wrong thinking,
you can expand your life and get the flow going. That’s when things open up, any
and all areas, whether it’s romance, health, physical well-being, or finances. So ask
yourself, “Where in my life am I still holding on to a grudge against myself or
another person?”
I was reading a book on the cure for cancer by a Chinese medical doctor,
who says that people would actually cure cancer in themselves if they faced their
life and admitted where they had not forgiven themselves or others. He said this is
where there’ve been healings, cures, and transformations. But people who held on
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and didn’t want to forgive, let go, or say, “I’m sorry,” often just maintained their
illness right through death. This is how powerful forgiveness is.
Janeen:
And when you’re willing to offer that forgiveness, it doesn’t matter how the
other person responds.
You get the grace, that undeserved, unearned favor, simply because you let
go of that toward them. The energy inside you is the issue.
Joe:
It’s all about how you’re feeling.
When you release that feeling, it doesn’t matter if the other person is saying,
“I forgive you,” “I acknowledge you,” or “Thank you.” What matters is what
you’re doing to release your energy in you. That’s it.
Janeen:
That’s wherein the healing lies.
Joe, thank you so much for teaching us these beautiful principles, and for
joining us here today.
Joe:
Thank you, Janeen, and God speed to all of you.
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Secret Session #6
Joe Vitale with Gregory Downey
Gregory:
Joe, welcome.
Joe:
Thank you, Gregory. Would you like to get started with a moment of
gratitude?
Gregory:
That would be perfect.
Tonight I’m feeling especially grateful for my wife. I’ve had the
privilege of caring for her today as she’s been ill, and helping out with my
children. Without my wife, I would be less than the individual that I am. I’m
grateful for her smile. I’m grateful for her radiance and her patience. I’m
grateful for her personality, her love, and her compassion. I’m grateful for
her belief and her support.
I’m grateful for moments of silence, moments of conversation, and
moments of laughter. I’m grateful for the way she looks at me when she
wants to give me the signal that I’m out of line, and the way she looks at me
when she wants me to know that she’s absolutely madly and deeply in love
with me. I’m grateful for the way she nurtures our children, the way she
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educates them, and the way she is the glue for our entire family. I’m grateful
for my wonderful wife.
Joe:
We can all look inside and around ourselves at any time to find something to
feel grateful for. Pick anything. For example, it could be the bottle of water I’m
seeing in this moment, a reminder of how vital water is to me. Humans are about
70% water, and most of the planet is water, so I need to hydrate and keep fluids in
my body. I’m grateful I have this water available for health. It’s a great reminder of
life, Divinity, and everything to be grateful for.
Anyone can do this right now. Just look around. It could be for your own
life. Maybe it’s for Miracles Coaching™, or a pet wandering around in your
vicinity. Perhaps you’re grateful for the weather.
I don’t know what it is for you, but gratitude is powerful. It will transform
your entire life, and bring you right here, into the moment. This is the big secret –
that this moment is all there is. When you’re in this moment with gratitude, you
experience the very miracle you’ve been looking for. It’s right here, not in the past
and not in the future. It’s in this moment, and gratitude brings you to it.
Gregory:
And when we’re in tune with this moment, that’s when we can receive
inspiration.
How can someone tell the difference between Divine inspiration and their
“human” self? Janeen, one of the Miracles Coaches, has said that our ego voice is
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an exterior pressure to do something, whereas the Divine voice is something you
want that wells up inside you. Is that a good description?
Joe:
Yes, and I’d take it a step further.
Everything is inside you, the entire experience of your life, including
everything that comes into your experience – other people, commercials,
advertisements, TV, work, home – everything. You experience it in you.
Looking at it from a unity, psycho-spiritual aspect, there isn’t anything on
the outside of you. Everything you see on the outside is a projection of what’s
inside of you.
Internally, things will bubble up within you, calling you to act on them, or
you may have what appears to be things showing up on the outside beckoning you
to go in their direction. How do you know what to do? Dr. Hew Len, the co-author
of Zero Limits who taught me Ho’oponopono, said, “You don’t always know the
difference. It’s very easy to be confused or swayed in one direction or another.”
He said to clean, clear, or pray on any impulse that shows up, whether you
think it’s from the ego or the Divine. He uses the Ho’oponopono clearing process,
repeating the phrases, “I’m sorry, please forgive me, thank you, I love you.” If the
impulse remains after some undetermined amount of time (it could be three times,
it could be three days), he assumes it’s coming from inspiration, the Divine.
I do something similar when I get an impulse to do something, such as
record another CD, write a book, or do a seminar. If these things knock at my inner
door, I ask, “Is this coming from my ego wanting to brag about having another
book or is this coming from the Divine, inspiring me with another book idea?” I sit
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with it and I try to sense if this coming from my heart or from my head. It’s an
important distinction.
We can all do this. It’s just a matter of turning off your phone, getting quiet,
slowing down your breathing, relaxing a little bit, maybe walking off into the
woods and sitting on a tree stump. Sit with the impulse from that place inside
yourself and see if you can feel the impulse in your body. Try to identify where it’s
located. Is it coming from your head? Does it seem to be around your brain or
behind your eyes? Or does it seem to be coming from something deeper and lower,
like in your heart, chest, or even lower in my stomach?
In some martial arts, and in Chinese philosophy, they say the center of your
mind is actually about where your belly button is. We confuse the center of our
mind with where our brain is, so it can be helpful and valuable to get a sense of
how the impulse relates to your body.
When I use this technique, I want it to come from my belly or heart area,
which is more in tune with the earth and Divinity. If it’s coming from my head, it’s
not right or wrong, but suggests it may be coming more from ego than inspiration.
So I check in, “Here’s the feeling. I don’t know if it’s inspiration or ego.” Then,
like Dr. Hew Len, I’ll clear on it, “I love you, I’m sorry, please forgive me, thank
you.” After the dust settles, I’m usually pretty clear which way to go.
Essentially, you’re learning to fine tune your sensitivity. If you’re in
Miracles Coaching™, bounce these ideas off your coach, because getting objective
feedback can help you decide if this is the way to go.
Gregory:
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So if something is Divine, it’ll stay. In other words, if you’re trying to clear
on something that is actually positive or meant for you, and it’s a good feeling, you
won’t clear it.
Joe:
If I’m cleaning and clearing and the impulse is still there, then that’s the way
to go, and I’ll say, “Okay, that’s the one to do, that’s what to do next.”
Gregory:
Can you describe a few different ways for alleviating physical pain?
Joe:
The first thing is go to the doctor if you need to.
So many people dismiss the obvious because they’re looking for a magic
bullet, but I know that if I’m in extreme pain, and depending on what is happening
or how extreme it is, I’m either going to the emergency room or to a family
physician. It’s wisdom to use resources available for us. I don’t want to dismiss
them thinking, “Oh, I should be using my brain power, or my spirit power, or I
should be praying my way out of this.” Yes, I may do those, too, but sometimes an
answer to a prayer is a doctor. Medicine is there for a reason.
That being said, outside of an emergency, I like to experiment with healing
techniques I’ve learned to do before going to a doctor. I’ve rid myself of a lot of
pain through some of these, which I discuss in my audios and books, like The Key.
For example, if I have a headache, I use a technique I learned decades ago
that has always worked for me. In fact, I first used this technique to help my wife,
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who has since passed away. She would get terrible headaches, and you could tell
just by looking at her face. I would ask her two rounds of the questions, which took
about two minutes, and by the third time, she’d smile and said, “It’s gone, it’s
gone.”
The technique is simple. Using your imagination, the first thing is to ask
questions, either out loud to someone, or in your mind:
 What color is it? Red, yellow, gray, black, blue, or something else?
 How much does it weigh? How heavy is my headache?
 If I could measure it with a ruler, how wide, long, and deep is it?
 If I could smell the headache, what does it smell like?
Circulate through those questions, and any other questions that keep you
focused on the headache. While it sounds like it would make your headache worse,
it actually makes it go away, according to a theory that pain is simply trying to get
your attention. Once you give it that, the pain begins to evaporate and disappear.
There are all kinds of techniques that involve paying attention to what’s
bothering you, because what’s bothering you is actually trying to tell you
something. It wants your attention.
You can also directly ask why the pain is there to begin with, and ask it to
reveal its lesson to you.
Gregory:
I’m sure it has many different applications. You could probably apply this to
stress or to anxiety, as well – as long as it’s not something life threatening.
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Are there different ways to alleviate emotional pain, or would they be the
same?
Joe:
They’re the same to me.
An emotional pain is another energy field in your body that’s asking you to
pay attention to it. The great lesson in all of this, whether you’re dealing with
emotional or physical pain, is that there are messages trying to be delivered. Most
of the time, we don’t listen – so the pain gets worse. It gets stronger, louder, and
more persistent because it’s trying to get our attention. When we give it attention,
it starts to go away.
Recently I was reading about cancer patients who had seen therapists as a
last resort, after trying natural methods and chemotherapy. The therapist would ask
them to focus on their pain, or on the cancer, and actually talk to it. Again, this
involves using your imagination. It may not verbally say anything, but you’ll get
some sort of impression of a message.
A lot of the messages had to do with love and forgiveness, letting go of
resentment, grief or aggravation. The more people moved towards totally forgiving
themselves, which is always the biggie, and then forgiving anybody else for
perceived misjudgments, the pain would start to alleviate. This included emotional
pain, as well. So pay attention to the messages.
Gregory:
Forgiving ourselves definitely frees up a lot of energy.
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Let’s shift gears and talk about money. Lately, I’ve had a lot of students ask,
“How do I Nevillize when I know I’m dead broke and feel panicked?” Could you
describe how a person can feel like they have money when they’re clearly broke?
Joe:
It’s far easier than you think.
When you’re stuck in the energy of the feeling of being broke, you have to
look past it. Of course, it feels like you can’t do it because you’re really stuck in
the muck in that moment. I suggest reading wealth-oriented magazines and
biographies of wealthy people, as well as watching documentary movies like that,
to help you take on the feeling of already having wealth.
The most important thing to remind yourself is that whatever is going on
right now is temporary. No matter what experience you’re having in this moment,
it’s going to pass. Remind yourself that this is current reality and current reality
will change. It always does – that’s the nature of life – and it’s going to change by
itself. Can you accelerate it? Yes, and that’s what Miracles Coaching™ is designed
to do.
So when somebody says, “I am broke. I can’t imagine being wealthy,”
they’ve got to pause and say, “Is it always going to be like this? No, it’s not. In
fact, it’s impossible for it to always be like this because the nature of life is always
to change. It is going to change.” You shake loose those little handcuffs on your
mind that say, “I’m broke and I’m always going to be broke,” and begin to realize,
“Well, of course it’s not always going to be like this. It’s going to get better. I may
not know how and I may not know when, but it will get better.”
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Begin imagining the time when it is better. Maybe you imagine yourself
talking to a wealthy person you’ve read about, or perhaps you’re featured in one of
the wealth magazines. You could begin acting like someone you admired in a
documentary, or imagine yourself walking around in a great suit or dress you saw
in a high end catalogue.
After you’ve shaken off the mental cement of thinking, “Oh, this is where I
am and it’s always going to be that way,” this is when you begin Nevillizing. If
you do everything being asked of you in Miracles Coaching™ and you talk to your
Miracles Coach, you’re going to accelerate the process. You’ll go in the correct
direction.
So remind yourself, “It’s not going to stay like this.”
Gregory:
When I have a student struggling with this, I’ll ask, “Let’s say you have the
money, what does that look like? Are you buying a new house or car? Can you see
yourself waking up in the morning and putting your feet down on the custom floor
you’ve picked out? Can you see yourself walking down the stairs into the custom
kitchen you’ve designed? What does it look like for you? Describe it in detail.”
As they begin to draw that picture in words, they think, “Okay, this is it,”
and start feeling it.
Joe:
That’s a great exercise and demonstrates how easy it is to expand your mind
about wealth consciousness.
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Also, for people who are wrestling with money or feeling broke, I’ve got a
free book called Attract Money Now, which you can download at
www.attractmoneynow.com.
Gregory:
What if someone’s running into a lot of obstacles in their life?
For example, one of my students is having trouble getting his web business
up and running. He said, “I’ve been positive in believing, but everything seems to
be going wrong. The website designer isn’t coming through. The e-mail campaign
didn’t produce anything. My bank held a check too long and bounced my account.
I’m going crazy with all these problems. What am I doing wrong?”
Joe:
He’s not doing anything wrong.
When you start to pursue your dreams, anything that’s in the way of it is
going to bubble to the surface. This is good news, because it means that if you
have any negative beliefs, if you have any doubts, if you have any fears, they’re
going to show up. They’re showing up because they’re ready to be erased and
removed, cleaned and cleared, and just taken out of your life.
Every single business person I’ve ever met, talked to, or read about,
including myself, have all made attempts just like this person is describing.
Sometimes it feels like, “That didn’t work and I didn’t get the results I wanted. It’s
beginning to feel like everything’s stacked against me and it’s never going to
work.” The secret to their success is they went on and did the next thing anyway.
They learned from what was going on.
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For example, when that person said they did an e-mail campaign and there
was nothing, that’s not true. They got priceless feedback. Maybe the feedback said
they need to tailor, change, or remold what they’re selling, or that particular e-mail
approach didn’t work and you have to try something different. There is no such
thing as failure. It’s all feedback. I know it feels like failure sometimes, but take a
deep breath and say, “What did I learn from this?”
Let me give you a concrete example. I was reminiscing with my music
producer recently about how we met six years ago, when a mutual friend
volunteered his band to play at a publicity event I put on.
As it turned out, the event did not go as well as I wanted in terms of people,
media, or books sold. You could say, “Well, that was a failure,” but I never called
it that. I learned from it and said, “I have to do it on a different day, send out a
different press release, and do such and such.” It looked like a failure, but I saw it
as feedback.
Yet something even bigger took place, although I didn’t see it until five
years later when I ran into my friend, the lead singer from the band. We decided to
go to lunch, and that’s when he shared his new business with me where he trains
people how to be musicians in a year-long program, helping them with their songs,
singing, and producing their first CD.
He didn’t know I wanted that exact service, and I didn’t know that he was
going to provide it when we met for lunch. We were there to reminisce, share, be
friends, and catch up. The seed, though, had been planted five years before at an
event that I could have perceived as a failure.
You have no idea exactly what happens when you go and take some effort in
the direction of making your dreams come true. Part of what happens is any
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negative beliefs come to the surface. Great, that’s a chance for you to erase them.
Another part of it is that you get direct feedback on a business model that may
need to be changed, adapted, or rewritten. The last part is you may be making
connections, or planting seeds, and you won’t see the fruit of it for a year or two,
or in my case, five or six years later.
There is so much that’s happening, you can’t say nothing happened or it all
failed. That is not accurate.
Gregory:
What if someone is feeling a lot of anxiety? Is it just a case of being out of
the moment – and, if so, how can they get back in the moment and stop worrying
all the time?
Joe:
The first thing is remind yourself you’re not worrying all the time. If you
were, you’d be walking into walls. You wouldn’t be able to function.
It’s so easy to deceive ourselves and go into self-sabotage, thinking that
because you’re worrying about something, you’re “worrying all the time.” True,
there might be some moments where fear kicks in and you’re wondering, “What’s
going to work out? How are things going to get paid? When am I going to get a
particular phone call?” But that’s just the human mind – it works in that kind of
survival-oriented way, trying to protect you. One way around it is to remind
yourself you’re totally fine.
Here’s the major key: Look in this moment, get back to this moment. Touch
your desk. If you’re driving, touch the dashboard, or touch the phone. Physical
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touching helps bring you back in the moment. The more you can be in this moment
and relax, the more you’re going to disconnect the worrying mind. Then start to
focus your mind on gratitude. You can begin anywhere.
I talk about this in the movie called The Compass, where I hold up a pencil.
At first, I’m not really grateful and making it up, but by the time I’ve explored all
the reasons to be grateful for a pencil, I’m truly in gratitude, which means I’m back
in the moment.
Reminding yourself that all is well, that you have things to be grateful for,
and you’re in this moment doing the right things – being in Miracles Coaching™,
taking action, going in the direction of your dreams – all of these things can help
disconnect that hardwired worrying system.
Gregory:
And the amazing thing is it only takes two or three minutes of focusing on
your breath to get back in the moment and be mindful of where you are. Just
experiencing your breath and being human is a wonderful way to decompress,
realign, and refocus.
I also sometimes recommend to students that they take some time to listen to
your album, Aligning to Zero. Most of those tracks are between four and six
minutes, and it’s a great way to do some clearing and be reminded of the moment.
What about relationships? Do you offer any resources for meeting better
friends? One of my students said, “I need new friends. I am upper middle class
now, but all my friends have been poor or broke people. I love them, but I feel like
I need a group that’s a step up on the socioeconomic ladder from me.”
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Joe:
This question surprises me because there are so many opportunities and
ways to meet people today – the internet, church groups, civic groups, Rotary
Clubs, Kiwanis Clubs, school meetings.
Take some time to reflect on what you love to do, your hobbies, your
experiences, and education. No matter what it is, you’ll find groups everywhere on
the internet. You name it, there’s a group for it. And, of course, Facebook is
famous for connecting people.
If you want to do it in or near your hometown, start looking at civic
communities or church groups there, or other functions. You could even volunteer
at some shelters and meet people making a difference. Wealthy people often show
up there because they want to give back, contribute, and volunteer.
Gregory:
There’s a wonderful website called www.meetup.com in just about every
community. In fact, they have a Law of Attraction meet-up group that meets
regularly where I live. It’s a wonderful resource.
They could also join a local professional networking group, or look online
for mastermind groups
Joe:
Bill Hibbler and I wrote a book together called Meet and Grow Rich, which
explains how to build your own mastermind group – how to find and attract the
people to get into it, and how to run it. It’s a complete, definitive book – the only
one I know about how to put together your own mastermind group.
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Gregory:
What would you say to someone who doesn’t understand their role or
responsibility in creating a relationship that doesn’t work?
For example, what if someone feels like, “I just can’t understand how I’m
responsible for my creepy ex-wife taking all my money and divorcing me. I loved
her and did everything for her. I know that I’m in victimhood, but I can’t seem to
get out of it because I can’t comprehend how I am responsible for that.”
Joe:
There’s a key distinction between blame and responsibility, and people often
confuse them. They end up blaming themselves and feeling guilty for what took
place, but when you do that, you’re torturing yourself unnecessarily. It’s not
helpful, or going to shed any light on the situation.
Responsibility is different. It’s a clear awareness that in some way, shape or
form, unconsciously, you participated in a dance in that relationship. I’m purposely
stressing the word unconsciously because, as we’re discovering in the field of
neuroscience and neuroplasticity, we know very little about our own behavior.
Ninety nine percent of what we do and think, and how we behave, is driven
by our unconscious mind. Our conscious mind is the tip of the iceberg – even
though we think it’s running the show of our life. It’s not, and why it’s so
important to realize that whatever is going on in your life – good, bad or indifferent
– is probably stemming from beliefs in your unconscious mind.
So when you’re in a relationship that doesn’t end in such a happy-go-lucky
way, it’s not a matter of blaming yourself, blaming him, her, or anybody else. It’s a
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matter of realizing you had some beliefs in your unconscious mind that attracted
the situation.
We can learn from it, release those beliefs, and go on to a happier
relationship. When you look at it in this neutral way, it’s a healthier way to part
and grow. If you look at it like, “I did this to myself. What kind of an idiot am I? I
feel guilty and stupid,” you’re not going to learn anything. In fact, you’ll stay the
victim.
If you want to get out of victimhood you’ve got to look at responsibility as
an awareness tool. That’s the best way to get out of it and make sure it doesn’t
happen again.
Gregory:
One of the things I encourage people to do to help them get realigned and
find balance is to make a “bucket list.” It doesn’t have to be anything that’s
expensive or elaborate.
Just write down things you’ve always wanted to do that could bring balance
into your life. I’ve even suggested going out and feeding the ducks. I’ll ask, “When
was the last time you fed the ducks or camped out overnight and watched the stars?
When was the last time you had a weenie roast?”
It seems that when we’re trying to attract money and work a regular job, we
have all these things going and get so caught up in what it is we’re chasing, we
forget to be in the moment.
If you were to make a summer bucket list, what are some things that you
would put on the list?
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Joe:
That’s a juicy question, and my first answer is, “I’m already doing it.”
I’m pursuing music, which was on my bucket list for the longest time. I’ve
put three CDs out in one year, a fourth one I’m working on, and I’m having a blast.
Next up is performing. Even though I’ve been on stage a lot, and played
harmonica on the stage, I’ve never sang my own songs, or played the guitar, except
for a couple of friends. That’s on the bucket list and I will be doing it, guaranteed.
I’ll also be announcing a Hypnotic Marketing Secret Retreat in my area
probably later this year, which I haven’t done in ten years, where I’ll reveal all my
marketing and copywriting secrets, things I’ve been doing in my business for
decades.
On a more playful note, I’ve never gone hot air ballooning, and I think that
would be cool. I’ve never done the zip line, either, and we’ve got one five miles
from where I live. I’d also like to go to a drive-in theater. I don’t remember the last
time I did that, except as a kid. I don’t even know if they’re still around. Speaking
of theaters, there are theaters that offer full course meals and drinks while you
watch a movie, and I’ve never done that.
Gregory:
My sons and I recently had an experience that was on our bucket list –
learning about bee keeping. We put on the whole bee suit so we could watch while
they opened the hives, then we expelled honey, chewed on fresh honeycomb, and
separated the honey from the wax with our mouth.
It was a wonderful way to forget about everything that needed to be done,
and just focus on something we’ve wanted to do – experience that part of nature to
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better understand where food comes from. It felt abundant to observe everything
and the complexity of the life of a bee.
I tell students that if they’re going to have a bucket list, also keep a gratitude
journal and write down how they felt – what the moment was like. And I remind
them that now is the time to do things that you’ve never thought you could do
before. We hear so much about the economy – but there is no better time than right
now to start a business, to start doing the things you’ve always wanted to do.
Joe:
That’s the cool thing about a bucket list, putting all this fun stuff on it so you
can experience more of life, the juice. It opens you up internally and energetically,
puts you more in contact with the world, and probably relieves a whole bunch of
stress. What a great gift to give yourself.
Gregory:
Thank you, Joe, for your time here today.
Joe:
Thank you, Gregory, and God speed to everyone.
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Secret Session #7
Joe Vitale with Michelle Minzghor
Michelle:
Joe, welcome. We’re glad to have you with us.
The question we’ll be addressing in this conversation centers around, “How
do I set my intention, create an action list, set the intention of the universe, and let
go of the how?”
Joe:
Thank you, Michelle, that’s a great question – and really, it’s the secret to
attracting, creating, manifesting miracles in your life.
In reality, we don’t know precisely how to accomplish anything. We trick
ourselves into thinking we know, and convince ourselves of that. On one level,
that’s fine, but in order to accomplish some of the bigger things that we want in our
life, we have to have this state of letting go.
As many of you know, I’ve become a musician, yet just a short time ago I
did not call myself that. I was interested in music, but had never written a song or
performed in public, and couldn’t carry a tune. I might have known three cords on
the guitar. I did play a little harmonica and from time to time, but that’s a campfire
instrument and an easy thing to play.
A year and a half ago I was looking at my life and what I wanted to do next,
and realized I had a latent desire for music. I’d been buying guitars over the years,
but they were more like works of art to look at. I didn’t really play them. So I set
the intention that I wanted to create music, be a musician, and record an album.
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As I said it, I didn’t know where to start or how to get to the end result, so
the first thing I did was start doing a little research. I went to Amazon and typed in
musician, how to play the guitar, or how to write a song. I began gathering
information, which kept leading me to another book or another product. I came
across the software program called “Master Writer” that a lot of musicians use to
write their songs. Then, a couple of famous musicians I know endorsed it, so I
bought it.
Take a moment to consider all this. When I said I wanted to be a musician, I
didn’t know that there was something called “Master Writer.” I didn’t know what
the different books were or which books would be the right ones to get me where I
wanted to go.
The important thing is I took steps once I set the intention to be a musician,
and I did whatever seemed like the obvious next step. Obviously it’s not the final
step, or even the step that’s going to make me a musician. It’s a step along the
way. It’s like picking up breadcrumbs. I go to Amazon. I buy some books. I buy
some audios. I poke around on the internet. I start asking people who teaches
guitar, who does this, who does that.
Along the way, someone who helped me out with a publicity project six
years ago shows up in my life. Out of the blue he sends me an e-mail about getting
together for lunch. This wasn’t orchestrated. It wasn’t something I knew to do or
part of my “how to become a musician.” It was something that came out of the
universe as a result of me saying, “I want to be a musician.”
It turned out that he had just started a business where he helps people write,
produce, record, and create their first album. There’s no way I could have
projected or predicted that. It simply came out of declaring my intention, and then
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following the breadcrumbs, saying “yes” to different leads, including lunch with
this guy, who turns out to be somebody who can actually hold my hand through the
process.
When we got together for that lunch, neither he nor I knew what the other
was up to. He didn’t know I had an interest in music, or had set an intention. I
didn’t know he had just started a business. This demonstrates why we don’t need to
know the specifics on how to get something done – by taking action it evolves and
unfolds.
At this point I’ve got multiple CDs produced, and have been on the cover of
magazines with them. I’ve been in Rolling Stone® magazine. In a couple of weeks
I’m going into the studio to create my next singer-songwriter CD. I did all of this
without knowing how to do it.
Michelle:
That’s amazing.
Does it work for everything, for example, on a community level?
Joe:
Yes, and in fact, in my book, Attract Money Now, Step 7 is to do something
big for your community.
I started working on that level, too, when a few years ago I decided I wanted
to do something for my country. I had been homeless at one point in my life, and
kept thinking, “I want to do something for people who are either homeless or about
to be.” I got this wild idea to start Operation Yes, a movement to end homelessness
in United States. The “yes” stands for “Your Economic Solution.”
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Think about this. Again, I’m going to do something that has never been done
before, daring something worthy. I’m thinking to myself, “Okay, I want to end
homelessness, but I don’t know how.” I have a goal, and I know to do a couple of
things. I put up a website at www.operationyes.com, and started researching to see
what’s already been done on ending poverty, stopping foreclosures, and how the
system handled people who are homeless. I knew to do a few basic steps, but I
didn’t know how to get to the point where I could actually pull off something like
this, so I go about my business.
One day I was at the airport wandering around a bookstore, one of my
favorite things to do, and see a book on the shelf at eye-to-eye level, written by a
guy who is ending poverty. I thought, “Oh, my God. This is perfect.” I bought the
book and devoured it on the plane. As soon as I landed, I reached out to the writer,
Scott Miller, who is president of an organization called Move the Mountain
[www.movethemountain.org]. He’s been working in this area for years, and has
developed a tested system and program for ending poverty.
As I began networking with him, I thought, “Okay, I want to do something
really big. I have an idea for a 3-step program that could effectively end
homelessness in one day, if I can get those three elements across.”
The first element is helping people with their self-esteem, because I know
that homeless people feel hopeless. The second is to help them have an
entrepreneurial mindset, which moves them out of being a victim. Finally, the third
is to teach them how to do internet marketing – because I think anybody can get to
a computer.
Even homeless people can get access to a computer through the library or
schools, and if I do it right, I can find computers to be donated to different people.
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So as this continues coming together, all the while I don’t know how to end
homelessness. I just keep going through the process of following leads, buying a
book, making a phone call, sending an e-mail, and checking out the website. I
meditate, pray, reflect, and keep taking action.
It all began with me saying, “I want to end homelessness,” without having a
clue how to go about something like that. What I did know, though, is that having a
dream, a vision, an inspiration, or an intention, begins the process.
Michelle:
I read a book called Drawing on the Powers of Heaven, by Grant Von
Harrison, that says we have to have pure motive. In other words, we need to center
intentions to the universe. We need to create it spiritually first.
Everything has to be created internally before it can be created physically,
and setting an intention is how we do that. I set my intention and speak to the
universe about what I desire, and then use my own common sense, which God
gave me, to try to come with the how. I make an action list and start doing those
little steps. I like to use the phrase “creating it physically” – referring to my part in
getting it to fruition.
As the universe witnesses our actions, contacts come into flow and books
come into evidence with us. All sorts of things happen to keep that ball rolling.
Joe:
That’s really how it works, although we all want the security of having a
roadmap in front of us that says, “Do A, then B, then C, then D, and then you’ll
end up at Z.”
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But the reality of life is not like this, and why how-to books don’t work for
everybody. Everybody is different, every situation is different, and every moment
changes. What worked in 1935 may not work right now, so we have to have trust
and faith when we establish our inspiration and intention. You say, “This is what I
want. This is what I want to attract, achieve, manifest. This is the difference I want
to make.” That’s the seed. After you’ve planted your seed, you begin taking
whatever actions you’re inspired to take around it.
As you take those actions, new actions and opportunities, unfold – but you
won’t see those actions down the road until you begin the trek. It’s like if I get in
my car and there’s an accident down the road, a detour, or a new road being built,
I’ll discover it in the process of driving. So we want to have an intention and start
taking action knowing what our end result is – the goal, intention, inspiration, or
miracle we want.
The bigger the goal, like when I stated that I wanted to end homelessness,
the cloudier how to get there will be, but the clouds part, the sun shines, and the
skies get clearer as you start moving towards it.
Michelle:
How would we have the opportunity to learn and grow, or refine ourselves,
if the roadmap said, “Go a hundred miles, turn left, go twenty miles, and turn
right?” We wouldn’t learn to trust and have faith in a higher power, whether you
call it the universe, God, or the Divine.
Joe:
It’s more fun this way – it has a sense of surprise.
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I still remember the moment in the airport bookstore when I saw that book
on ending poverty right at my eye level. I was jarred in the most exquisitely
wonderful way. Part of me was even confused because I thought, “I already did a
search on Amazon. How come this book didn’t show up?” And then another part
of me said, “The Divine put this book here.”
Why not? After all, there aren’t that many books in an airport bookstore; it’s
not like Amazon. What are the chances an airport bookstore would have a book on
ending poverty, which I happened to see at eye level? If it had been at knee level I
might not have seen it.
So that’s what I mean by a sense of surprise – and that surprise tells me I’m
on the right path. It’s a sign or clue that the universe is watching my back, that God
is saying, “Hey, this is the next breadcrumb. Pick this book up. Read this book. Get
whatever value is in it and then reach out to the author.”
I followed each step as it presented itself, and not only did Scott and I
become friends, we ended up doing a workshop together – none of which I could
have foreseen.
Michelle:
Both setting your intent to the universe and taking inspired action has to
coexist together for us to be able to create what we want out of life.
In the book I mentioned earlier, Drawing on the Powers of Heaven, the
author says that, “Dedication alone is not sufficient. You must request the
blessing.” Inviting that higher power into our goal is part of creating it spiritually,
and, when we do this, that higher power – God, the universe, the Divine – sees our
dedication and effort, and does its part in moving things along, one after the other.
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A couple of years ago, a speaker was addressing a group of husbands and
wives and said, “If you want to increase your strength in your marriage, then the
person who desires it has to invite the universe, or God, into that goal – and then
you alone need to come up with an action list of what you know you can do
differently to get that relationship where you want it. Maybe you need to quit
nagging, or say, ‘I love you,’ more often. Maybe you need to tell them how much
you’re appreciative of all that they do.”
This is a list that anyone can create on their own, which is all we have to do.
From there, God or the universe can further inspire us or the other person in a
relationship. It’s always something inside of us that’s preventing us from reaching
a goal or intention, so it has to start there. When we get out of the way, the
universe can do its part.
Joe:
I’m a big believer in taking action because life is a co-created experience.
Yes, I look outside and see trees growing; I see that God, the universe, the Divine,
is supporting life. It’s keeping us going, keeping things alive.
Still, I have to take action to show the universe that I am willing to do
whatever it takes to create whatever it is that I’ve established. So when I say that I
want to be a musician, I take the steps to become a musician. Even though I don’t
know all the steps, or how to get to the end result of holding a CD I’ve created in
my hand, I do know the first steps, like doing some research and reading available
books.
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As I do that, the universe watches and says, “This person really does want to
do this. They’re already co-creating that manifestation. Let’s chime in and help
out. I’ll give him the next clue, and best tools.”
It comes from the doing. If I just sit here and say, “I want to end
homelessness,” but never do anything, I would never accomplish anything. It’s in
the taking of action that the way becomes clear. The road is actually being paved in
front of me as I take action, even though I don’t know how to get to the end.
I keep repeating this because you have to take action on what you know to
do, trusting that you’re going to be supported along the way, and keeping your
eyes open for the signs, clues, next steps, and opportunities. Continue to take
action and seize those moments when they’re handed to you.
This joint partnership of you and the Divine – you taking your action, and
the Divine giving you more support – is the way you’ll get to the end result. You
don’t need to know how to get there. Just follow the steps and keep working
towards it.
Michelle:
When I’m working with my students, I teach them to have Divine centered
intentions. I ask, “What is the motive behind wanting to make this extra money, or
this abundance? What are you going to do with the abundance when you receive
it?”
For example, one of my students used Ho'oponopono to co-create
manifesting a contract in her business. She is a healer, and uses both Reiki and art
therapy. She wanted to take her art therapy to a different level, and reach out to
geriatric patients, which was a Divine motive.
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She decided to start sending out a packet of information about her work to
retirement and assisted living centers in her area, one a day, five days a week. She
did this week after week, but wasn’t getting the results she wanted, even though
she followed up with phone calls. She kept getting turned down, until one day, a
retirement center said, “Yes, we are interested in learning more as to what you can
do for our residents.”
She met with them and they were delighted with what she wanted to do.
They told her, “We would love to sign your contract right now, but it’s contingent
upon a government grant coming through for our facility. So we’ll be in touch with
you within a week to let you know whether that grant has come through.”
We continued our coaching calls together, and the next week she got a
phone call from the facility saying that their government grant had been declined,
and the money wasn’t going to be available. As you can imagine, she was
somewhat disgruntled and said, “Maybe I shouldn’t even continue this avenue.
Maybe it’s not going to get me anywhere.”
I said, “Wait a minute. There is an opportunity to do some Ho’oponopono
work here. You could be clearing on behalf of the government agency that makes
these financial decisions that affect the elderly, sending love, even though we don’t
know who these people are.
“You can send love to the government agency, to those individuals that
make up the decisions for this care center, clearing on their lack of awareness of
the mental stimulation and needs the elderly have. You can also send love to the
end recipients, which would be the residents of this care center.”
She did this for weeks. In the meantime, we let that conversation go and
continued our calls, focusing our attention on other areas she was making progress
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in. Not long after, it was time for another coaching call, so I sat down to read a precall form we have people fill out before every session. It was all negative, and I
remember thinking, “Oh, goodness, I have some work to do for her.”
When we got on the call, I said, “Hello, how are you?” fully expecting a
negative voice. Instead, she said, “Oh, Michelle, I’m doing great! After I filled out
that pre-call form two hours ago, I got a phone call. The senior care center called
and said the grant had been reissued, and they were ready to sign my contract.
They want the first corridor of the building painted by May 1st because the
secretary of state was coming to their facility.”
That’s all about the power of co-creating, believing, and doing, even though
she lost a little hope towards the end. I told her, “In a sense, you were right on the
verge of success. Yes, you started downhill when that final trial came your way,
but you did take action and the success came.”
We celebrated together when she signed the contract, and then I said, “You
still have work to do. You should continue cleaning and sending love to the
government agency and the recipients, but also do clearing for yourself because
you failed to stay positive. Ask forgiveness from the universe for your last couple
of hours, for spiraling downhill.” She completely agreed and wanted to stay on
track.
Overall, it was a beautiful experience for her that gave her a monetary
benefit, as well, even though she didn’t actually clear and clean on behalf of
getting the job for herself. She cleared and cleaned on behalf of the end recipients.
This had nothing to do with her. In the end, though, she received a signed contract
worth $20,000.
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Joe:
That’s a great punch line.
Michelle:
Yes, it shows pure motive, making sure our intentions are Divine.
Joe:
I’d point out, too, that she didn’t know how it was going to unravel, or
resolve itself. In fact, at one point, it looked like that particular door was closed.
Even when you don’t know how, you have to trust. You still have to clean,
clear, and work with your coach, doing all of the different things that come to
mind. Stay the course, stay at peace, and stay in serenity as you move forward
because you don’t know what’s going to happen next.
Like a mantra, you need to meditate every day and say, “I don’t know. I
trust, I’m taking action, but I don’t know what’s going to evolve.” “No” doesn’t
matter because it can continue evolving and end up being a “Yes,” or, as in her
case, $20,000.
You mentioned having goals be of a Divine, generous, compassionate
nature. A spiritual teacher, Jose Silva, used to say that the goal should benefit you
and at least three other people. I’ve always loved that as a rule of thumb. Whenever
you’re setting a goal, ask yourself, “How can this goal help three other people
besides me?” The universe notices when you expand yourself to include others in
an open-hearted way. Now it’s not just about you.
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It’s totally fine to do things for yourself – take care of, love, and appreciate
yourself. You deserve it, but you can get things faster and results more quickly
when you include others.
Michelle:
One way to know whether our intention or goal is coming from the Divine,
or ego, is to ask, “Does it just benefit me, or does it benefit me as well as others?”
I have another story related to cleaning and clearing, especially on one’s
past. A student of mine has been working towards the state of zero, which you
wrote about in Zero Limits, where we’re functioning out of love and manifestation
becomes so much easier.
After just a couple of weeks of doing this, she called me and said, “I have to
tell you what just manifested in my life. There’s a situation in my past where I’d
been holding onto anger and resentment towards some friends of mine for years
because they had not repaid a large sum of money they borrowed from me. I’ve
long since lost contact with them. I knew it was time to clean on it, and release
myself from those feelings.
“Sunday night I started using Ho'oponopono, clearing, cleaning, and sending
love to this couple, asking the universe to let them know that I forgave them. I kept
doing it for the last two days. Then, an hour ago you will never guess who knocked
at my door.”
That couple came to her in humility and apologized for avoiding their debt
to her all these years. They wanted to start a payment plan and offered their first
$500. She was awestruck, and she told them that she forgave them, not only of the
length of time, but also the debt. She said, “I don’t want your money. I just want
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you to know I forgive you of this debt, and I forgive you for all the years of nonpayment. I also want you to know I no longer have any anger or animosity.”
The couple said, “There must be something we can do for you.” When she
told them she’d love to plant some trees in her front yard, and they reached in their
pocket and gave her a $100.00 bill to buy them.
Going back to letting go of “the how,” she had no idea of how this would
unfold, or how she was going to be released of the anger and resentment. She just
knew that if she started the ball rolling and withdrew her anger, animosity, and
resentment, that God or the universe would do its part.
Joe:
That’s the power of forgiveness, and a great example of how it can
transform in the most unexpected ways.
Many spiritual teachers have said that the #1 thing you can do to unblock
your energy so you can attract more of the big dreams you want is to forgive
anybody for anything throughout your entire life – and, most importantly, to
forgive yourself.
Michelle:
It’s a strong lesson for all of us, and demonstrates that it starts within us.
There’s always something within us that is preventing us from manifesting our
desire, and, for her, it was the anger and animosity.
Imagine if she would have chosen to forgive 10 years ago?
Joe:
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Things would have manifested sooner.
Whenever you hold onto anger or any sort of emotion like that, the only
energy system you burn up is our own. The other people involved don’t have any
idea what’s going on. Even if you were in front of them being angry, you’re the
one burning up your own physiological and psychological system.
The sooner we let go of any of those feelings or stuck emotions, by forgiving
ourselves and others, releasing that energy, the better we feel. We return to a state
of balance and alignment with the universe, and we’ll have all of the energy that
has been wound up within us going forward to attract and manifest the miracles
that we’re longing for.
Michelle:
Along the idea of setting goals in harmony with the Divine, I like this quote
from Drawing on the Powers of Heaven:
Goals, or our desires, of course, need to be something you are not
currently achieving or something that will require a certain amount of
mental exertion. Otherwise, you will not be required to use faith as a
principle of power. You need to realize that the desire may not be easy to
achieve, but you must maintain the faith that if you make a determined effort,
that God or the universe will prepare a way for your righteous goals to be
accomplished. Your success in achieving the goal will be in direct
proportion to your faith and efforts, not your circumstances. Remember that
the power of faith has power, dominion and authority over all things.
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This is a great book, and literally tells you every step you need to manifest.
It supports everything we’ve talked about here, that it’s our level of belief, if you
want to use the word belief, or faith, in what we’re trying to accomplish, as well as
faith in the universe or God, that allows us to manifest the desires.
Joe:
As we speak, I’m ordering the book – and that’s what I mean about taking
action.
I don’t know where this book is going to lead me, but because it came up in
this conversation, I’m buying it, and that’s the answer to your original question.
You don’t know. I don’t know but I’m taking the action. When the book arrives,
I’ll read it and see what’s next in that moment.
Michelle:
That’s a great example of inspired action.
The author also says that our goals or intentions should be a means, not an
end. How often do we reach a goal and then suddenly stop? He says, “No matter
how many goals we may achieve during a lifetime, you must look ahead to a new
goal, otherwise you will experience a letdown every time you achieve a major
goal. The achievement of goals should be an ongoing process – not the culmination
of an effort that does not lead to a sustained effort to achieve additional goals.”
Joe:
I’ve discovered I always have an inspired goal, kind of dangling before me,
so that, as I’m finishing the one at hand, I have an eye down the road. It’s like
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saying, “Okay, I’m making a stop here as I’m driving down the road of life
because I’m accomplishing something.”
At the same time, I’m thinking, “This is where I’m going next.” I may not
know how to get to it, but it keeps me energized. As a result, I feel curious, and I
have a spring in my step. I’m taking action, continuing in the flow of life – and
there’s an exhilaration that comes from having that.
Michelle:
The thought that comes to mind is we need to emulate the grand creation we
live in.
Even though there’s chaos in the world and in our lives which brings
uneasiness, that chaos actually allows opportunity for creativity and growth. If you
are experiencing challenges in your life, or your life is in a state of flux, you can
use that chaos to channel creativity and move forward.
No matter where we find chaos in the world, or uneasiness – a lack of the
“hows” – we can turn our thinking towards the grand creation, allowing that chaos
to be able to redirect it. We can turn it into something good. We can find a solution
to the “hows” by living on faith, letting go of the urgency, learning from our
mistakes, and learning from our failures. This is what it means to emulate the
grand creation, and it’s a beautiful way to direct our lives.
Joe:
Yes, you have to trust the process.
Set your goals, and work on those that are coming from inspiration. Ask
yourself, “How many other people does this goal help besides me?” By doing this,
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your goal will produce a more benevolent outcome. Then, take action – in spite of
not seeing the entire picture much of the time.
You just have to trust that all the actions you’re taking will lead to new
actions, decisions, and opportunities. Seize them, and, before you know it, you will
arrive at your goal. The key principles are trust, action, keeping love in front of all
of it, and coming from love throughout it.
Michelle:
That’s like what your book, Zero Limits, talks about.
One of my elderly students has been a holistic practitioner for years, but her
practice wasn’t going the way she wanted it to. I had her work with visualization
and she said, “It just wasn’t coming to me. I was having a difficult time doing the
visualization.” Then, a thought came to her, “There’s an easier way, and that easier
way is Ho'oponopono, co-creating.” When she shared that with me I thought,
“You’re right, that is the easiest way.”
Of all the hundreds and hundreds of clearing techniques there are, the most
powerful one is Ho'oponopono, because it’s co-creating what we want – love. It’s
co-creating with the universe.
Joe:
Let’s leave that as the thought today, “There’s got to be an easier way.”
In fact, there is always an easier way. There is always a way, and there’s
always an easier way, are great things to keep in mind.
Michelle:
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Thank you for donating your time, Joe, and for sharing your wisdom.
Joe:
Thank you, Michelle. God speed to everybody.
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Secret Session #8
Joe Vitale with Adam Mortimer
Adam:
Welcome, Joe.
Joe:
Thank you, Adam. I’m glad to be here today.
Adam:
I’d like to get started with something that’s on everybody’s mind these days
– money. Recently, one of my students asked, “How do I overcome the block that I
cannot receive money?”
Can you talk about common blocks people have relating to this?
Joe:
It’s interesting, because when we use the word block, we actually set up a
block.
The only thing that’s preventing us from receiving the things we want are
beliefs, so when we call it a block, we make it seem more difficult than it is. The
word block just means a belief – and a belief is simply a thought. Beliefs are
thoughts you bought into and kept repeating, until that belief seemed like it was
reality. In my book, Attract Money Now, I talk about the most common ones.
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For example, many people believe money is the root of all evil – and, of
course, it’s not. In fact, as George Bernard Shaw said, “It’s the lack of money that
is the root of all evil.” I’ve always liked that perspective.
Whoever asked the question needs to work with their Miracles Coach and
explore what they believe about money, because something in them is keeping it
from coming into their life in greater amounts, or as much as they’d like.
It’s important to realize that you do have money. Money is coming into your
life, you’re already receiving. You already allow money to come in at a certain
level. Yes, you want to widen and upgrade it so you can allow more money to
come in, but the first thing is to realize you already have money coming in – you’re
not blocking money.
If you’re in Miracles Coaching™, paying for rent, food, and utilities, you are
receiving money. The question might become, “I’m frustrated, why am I not
receiving more money?” If so, that’s what you want to explore with your Miracles
Coach – why you feel frustrated. This will unveil the particular belief you have
around that.
Not everyone will have the same belief that’s stopping more money from
coming in, but there are some fairly common ones. For example, “There’s never
enough to go around.” People believe in scarcity, but it’s not a fact, it’s a belief.
When you question your beliefs, you loosen their hold, and then you can receive
even more.
It all begins with gratitude for this moment, for what’s going on in this
moment. When you say, “I want more money,” and forget you’re actually
attracting money right now, you need to pause and say, “I’m really grateful for
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what I’m attracting now, and I thank God, and myself, for allowing this much
money in.”
As you begin to realize that you are receiving money, and the more you can
move into that state of gratitude for it, the more you can allow money to come in at
even greater levels.
Adam:
If you believe you have a block there, you probably do. I know I had to clear
my own belief around that and my inability to receive. Once I did, good things
started happening.
To help them understand, I sometimes ask my students, “When someone
pays you a compliment, can you receive it?” I can’t tell you how many people are
blocked in something as simple as that, and a compliment does carry over to
money. There’s no real difference.
Joe:
A therapist said to me a long time ago, “How good can you stand it?” Most
of us have an unconscious barometer that keeps us from being a little too happy or
a little too wealthy. Some of it has to do with a sense of deserving.
For example, “I don’t deserve to have millions of dollars,” could be
somebody’s belief, but they feel okay with having a few thousand dollars or a few
hundred dollars. What’s the difference? Nothing – only their comfort level with
wealth, or their sense of deserving it. This kind of material is often best explored
with a Miracles Coach – that’s what they’re there for. They’re your ally and
support, an objective partner to help shine a light on what you may be seeing.
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So the good news is this isn’t a big deal. These aren’t irremovable blocks –
they’re ghostly beliefs that will go with the wind once you take a look at them.
Stop worrying about it and just focus on the fact that you are already receiving
money. There is no block. You are only expanding the stream.
Adam:
So you’re reminding everyone that the idea is to recognize and be grateful
for the wealth you already have in this moment.
Joe:
Yes, and I keep coming back to this because everything you’re looking for is
in this moment, yet we keep pushing this moment aside and being critical of it.
We’re always grading this moment and saying, “Yeah, yeah, yeah, that’s cool, but
this isn’t what I want, I want something else.” But that’s not how the world works.
When you can be in this moment with incredible gratitude, then that
gratitude expands to make the next moments coming into your life even more
enriched. So don’t look to the future and say, “I’m going to be happy when I have
more money,” or, “I’m going to be happy when I have all this other stuff.”
You want to be happy now, and you do that by feeling gratitude for what
you have now. As you move forward, you’ll be enriching yourself, pulling in more
and more of the things you long for – but dismissing this moment doesn’t help you
attract what you want.
Adam:
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Would you say this is a part of the Law of Attraction? And are there other
ways to make the Law of Attraction effortless and natural?
Joe:
Yes, definitely, and the first thought that comes to mind is, “Quit worrying
about it.”
The very desire to wrestle with it, or to think that it’s not already natural, is
what makes it feel unnatural. It’s similar to the idea that there are no blocks. The
more we can realize that the Law of Attraction is already operating, that you’re
already in it, using and living it, the more you realize, “Oh, it’s already in my
nature. It’s already here.” You want to learn to fine tune the process: Get clearer
about what you want; focus on where you want to go rather than where you’ve
been; and, focus on what you would desire to have rather than on what you’ve
been complaining about having or not having.
The more you get into a flow that says, “I’m grateful for everything I’ve
already attracted, and I have faith that I’m going to attract even more as I go
forward,” the more you stop wrestling with life. The flow is already here, so it’s
just a matter of stepping into it, so to speak.
This is the irony of it. You’re already in the flow and you don’t know it –
because you’re fighting with it. You’re thinking, “The Law of Attraction would
work better for me if I had a more natural approach to it.” It’s already working for
you! It’s already effortless, it’s already natural, if you’ll just relax into it.
How do you merge with the flow that’s going on in life? First, you stop
arguing with it. You find reasons to be grateful for it as it is, and as you’re grateful
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it will expand. Second, as you have faith, that faith gives you the energy to move
forward to do new things. The key words here are gratitude and faith.
It may sound like I’m oversimplifying it – but this is the million dollar
secret. Relax into this moment, which you attracted, you’re already in this
wonderful moment that you attracted. As you relax into it, you put yourself into a
place where you can receive inspired ideas and take inspired action, which leads to
more greatly enriched future moments. Remember, you’ve already got the Law of
Attraction working – and, best of all, it’s working on your side.
Adam:
It’s interesting how things work out very naturally and effortlessly when you
learn to let go and get into the flow, although this can be challenging sometimes.
What are some good tools to overcome the fear of doing something new?
Joe:
The one I like to suggest first is doing a mental rehearsal. Visualize yourself
taking the action on whatever it is that you’re attempting to do because the more
you can rehearse it in your mind, the more comfortable you’ll get.
When you’re about to do something new, usually you’re outside your
comfort zone, so you may have a little bit of insecurity and discomfort. The more
you mentally rehearse it – see yourself doing whatever that new thing is to the best
of your ability –the physical action becomes that much easier.
Another way to look at this is to imagine it not working out, where the
actions you take don’t work out the way you want, then ask yourself, “Am I still
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okay, am I still alive, do I still love and appreciate myself, can I still take actions
on the next idea, or the next steps?” And, of course, the answers are “Yes.”
Imagining a worst case scenario and realizing you’d still be okay after it,
takes the fear out of it so you can move forward and take action. You don’t have to
do the giant things first. The more you take baby steps in the direction of doing
something new, the more you build that muscle of self-confidence. As you do, you
gain more and more internal strength for when you’re ready to do something
bigger.
Adam:
If you ask someone, “How do you know you can tie your shoe?” they’ll say,
“Because I’ve done it a thousand times.”
It’s the same thing you’re talking about. Visualization works because the
subconscious doesn’t know the difference between fact and fiction. So if you
visualize something over and over, your subconscious eventually accepts it as real,
as really happening. And it’s a great way to build confidence easily and naturally,
without trying to build it. You simply do it in the mind first, and the mind accepts
it as if it’s already done physically.
Could you use this, or other sales tools, to increase your income or sales?
Joe:
Just about anything you would use for any other goal would be applicable to
that, as well, but having very concrete money goals is a good idea.
For example, if you’re already making a certain amount of money, you
might say you want to increase it by 15% in 30 days. It’s okay if you don’t know
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how to do it, as long as it’s believable to you. It could be 50%, if you believe that’s
possible, or at least probable.
The next step is to write out, “This is my intention. I’m going to increase
my sales by 15%.” Then state it aloud. I also believe in having visual reminders, so
I suggest putting it on the mirrors in your house or bathroom to see it every day,
like mini vision boards. Sometimes I’ll use an index card or other visual
representation of the end result of what I want.
When I look in the mirror I’m going to see myself and that card or imagery.
It’s a perfect time to do some self-programming, too – a pep talk or affirmation.
This sends a signal into my unconscious mind, “Here’s what I want, here’s where I
want to go.”
I’d also break it down further and say something like, “I’m going to make 20
phone calls in the morning.” Say whatever is believable that you intend to do.
These types of smaller goals are benchmarks that continually build inner strength
because, if you say you’re going to make five calls in an hour and you make those
five calls, you feel good about yourself. Then, when you say you’re going to
increase it and make 20 calls a day and follow through on that, you’re building
even more momentum within yourself.
Keep in mind you still want to maintain the proper mindset of feeling
gratitude. Feeling grateful for the sales you already have is going to help you
increase the attraction level for even more sales. So as you go through the day
making calls, some people buying and others not, you’re still grateful for all of
them.
Coming from a sense of service matters, too, because love is at the heart of
service. When you make your calls in person, by phone, or e-mail, you want to
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express, “I love my job, I love this product and service, and I love the people I talk
to, whether they buy or not.”
The more you can come from that spirit of love, the more they’re going to
feel it – and you just never know. If someone doesn’t buy from you right now, they
may call back to buy it another time, or they may tell someone who could end up
being your biggest sale of the month or year.
I truly believe in having this heartfelt approach and it’s at the core of my
own selling – love everybody you’re talking to. So first get your heart right, and
then add on visualization, seeing things working out the way you want. Have
concrete goals, whether it’s for the day, week, month, or year, and put little
reminders on the mirror. All of this keeps your energy up and you moving forward.
So if I had to reduce it to just one thing, it would be to love whatever
product or service that you’re offering. If you don’t, why are you selling it? And
love the people you talk to because you’re serving them, and they’ll feel it if you
come from love.
Adam:
I’d also add to clear any negativity you have around the product. Make sure
you’re in alignment with it, and that your desire and life calling lines up with the
product. That’s vital for love to come through.
Our CEO expresses it this way, “Your net hope is your belief minus your
doubts.”
Joe:
That’s worth writing down.
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Adam:
Just as we increase our net worth by paying down any liabilities, getting rid
of doubts increases your net hope and makes it stronger. You’ll get those sales and
definitely be using the Law of Attraction.
What about the importance of self-image? Is there a way to improve the way
a person views themselves?
Joe:
Yes, and it’s the same answer I gave in an interview recently on attracting a
soulmate – it’s all about loving yourself first. How well do you love yourself? This
is a key to building up your self-image, so you feel better and feel stronger about
yourself.
Look in the mirror – it’s one of the best things you can do. It’s the mirror
again, but this time you focus on finding all the things you like about yourself. It
can be anything about you. For example, you can say, “I really love your eyes. I
love the color of your eyes. I like the setting of your eyes. I like your eyebrows. I
really, really love your eyes.”
As I confessed in that interview, in the early days I was trying to build my
self-esteem, while coming out of homelessness and poverty. I felt worthless about
myself and like a victim. I didn’t have any self-confidence. I had no self-image
outside of someone who was poor and unhappy. That’s when I learned about this
technique. I’d stand in front of the mirror and say, “Okay, what is there that I can
begin to appreciate?”
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At first I didn’t like what I saw. I wasn’t happy with myself. I didn’t feel
proud. I’d think, “Come on, there’s something here. Keep looking.” It occurred to
me that, throughout my life, I’d always been complimented on the dimples in my
cheeks, so I said, “Well, everybody seems to love my dimples, so let’s start there.”
It’s funny now, but I had to start somewhere.
So I acknowledged I have great dimples that seemed to warm people and
cause them to smile and notice me. It was something I could see, “Okay, this
seems to be working.”
This is where you start. You look in the mirror, and in your life, and you find
something you’re proud of, content with, or happy with, and start with that – even
if they’re moments in childhood. We all have them. Maybe you got an “A” on a
paper. You won a spelling bee contest. Somebody complimented you on your
handwriting, or an art piece. Whatever it happens to be, focus on that as the
beginning point to rebuild and re-boost your self-image.
It’s similar to the gratitude technique where you start with something small
in the moment and expand your appreciation from that thing to everything around
you. You then realize it was always there, but you didn’t see it because of your
limited perception that was feeling down.
So look for something in your life, something in the mirror, to begin
focusing on and say, “Okay, this is what I’m grateful for, this is what I’m good at,
this is what I feel strong about.” That’s how you build your self-image. This isn’t
hard and it doesn’t have to take a long time.
Adam:
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Another technique is writing a script of what you’d like to become and who
you’d like to be, then visualizing yourself as if you’re already that person.
When you first do it, it may seem a little odd because it’s different and
doesn’t fit yet. It’s just like a pair of new shoes that you have to break in – after a
few weeks of wearing them, they feel comfortable. Your new self-image will get
comfortable, too, as your belief grows. It usually takes about a 21-day period of
visualizing it – really seeing it and believing that’s who you are.
As you’ve suggested, the use of mirrors is powerful, and it’s the perfect
segue to bring up the subject of “mirroring” someone else. Can you explain more
about this as a technique, and whether or not it works in gaining rapport with
someone?
Joe:
Mirroring is a Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) technique of matching
another person’s breathing pattern, rate of speech, and body movements in an
attempt to create an unconscious rapport with them. It definitely works, although at
first it can feel very awkward.
The missing secret that often goes unnoticed is that when you’re talking to
somebody about something you’re both excited about, you naturally do this. You’ll
automatically lean towards each other, gesture with your hands, and probably talk
at the same rate of speed. These are all things that would be called mirroring.
As a technique, mirroring or matching somebody is done consciously when
you want to create rapport with people. If people are interested in knowing more, I
would recommend reading some of the NLP books available. In fact, I’m reading
one now worth mentioning called The User’s Guide to Slight of Mouth: How to
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Unleash the Magic of Language to Persuade Anyone, Anytime, Anywhere by Doug
O’Brien.
Adam:
Mirroring is definitely a powerful tool with practice – you wouldn’t want to
copy someone to the point that it’s obvious. It’s got to be somewhat covert if you
want it to work properly and not appear clunky.
Joe:
Yes, that would negate the whole idea.
Adam:
Beyond creating rapport, what if someone wants to attract the relationship of
their dreams? Is there a way to let go of needing it – especially when you feel like
you do?
Joe:
I’ve been there. I know what it’s like to want to attract your soulmate, and to
experience that desperate feeling of need.
The first thing to do is look at what’s causing it – what’s the belief behind
it? Most of the time, it’s a belief that says, “I’m never going to find anybody.”
And, under that is a belief that says, “All the good people are taken.” But how can
that be? With seven billion people on the planet, surely all the good ones haven’t
been taken.
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Another belief is the idea that your time period is short, that you have to do
it now or it’ll never happen, or that you’re going to be alone. People have thoughts
like, “I’m alone at night and I’ll be alone in the future. What if I die alone? What if
I never have a family or kids?” That’s just your mind racing in negative beliefs and
limitations. They’re not reality. And here’s the secret to all that: The more you can
be content with yourself, by yourself, the more you’ll become desirable to other
people.
Nobody likes needy or desperate people. We want to be around happy,
content, secure people. So the more you can be secure and content with yourself,
being able to say, “I’m home alone tonight, but you know what? I’m going to
watch whatever I want on TV. Maybe I’ll write the great American novel or
compose a song.”
Regardless of what you choose to do, the more you’re happy about doing it
while feeling content with yourself, the more you up the odds that your phone is
going to ring. The key is to love, appreciate, and enjoy yourself first, and when you
do that, other people pick up the scent and come looking for you.
Adam:
You’re saying to let it go and let the universe bring it to you.
What if someone finds it hard to accept the idea that everything is a
projection of their mind? Will it hurt their ability to attract things?
Joe:
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No, because you’re attracting things right now – it’s already working. The
thing you’ll miss, however, is the sense of power that comes from having and
accepting full responsibility.
When people first hear about this, they often think, “Oh, my God, I’m not
responsible for the entire world and everything that’s going on,” but that’s not the
kind of responsibility I’m talking about. What I’m referring to is taking
responsibility for your experience of the world and everything going on around
you.
When you look out and see something you don’t like, it’s a reflection of
your belief system. The more you realize that everything going on around you is
your interpretation of reality, and own it, along with understanding and working
with your own beliefs, the better you can create the reality you want – the way you
want it.
If you want to think that the world is not a projection of yourself and disown
any sort of relationship to it, that’s fine, but it puts you in the position of playing
victim where you have no sense of control. And, it will make you feel separated
from the world – because you think the world’s “out there” and you’re “over here.”
When you move in the direction of thinking, “The world is a projection of
what’s inside of me, a mirror reflection,” then you can use it as a wake-up call.
You’re going in the direction of empowerment and conscious responsibility, which
has awareness attached to it, rather than guilt or blame. This acceptance of full
responsibility encourages you to become aware of your beliefs.
When you take responsibility for everything you see, in essence you’re
simply revealing your own beliefs. That’s powerful. And, as a result, you’ll be able
to attract more of what you prefer, and probably faster.
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Adam:
Could you suggest specific ways to clear beliefs if you’re a kinesthetic
learner?
Joe:
Kinesthetic people generally act on how things feel to them, and, although
any of the techniques I talk about would work, EFT (Emotional Freedom
Technique), might be highly effective. There’s a lot of information available online
about it, including the documentary movie I’m featured in called The Tapping
Solution.
EFT is like psychological acupuncture, but is done physically. You tap with
one hand on different parts of your body – your other hand, chest, forehead, face –
while saying certain clearing statements. Having said this, I don’t want people to
think they only have one learning style. We have all of them, so anyone who’s
kinesthetic is also visual and auditory. We might prefer one over the other, but any
of the clearing techniques are going to work.
Adam:
When I first heard about EFT, I had my doubts about it, but it works as a
powerful clearing method.
What about vision boards? They involve both visual and kinesthetic because
you’re physically putting it together like art. Do you have any best practices for
doing this relating to size or color? Should you have more than one?
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Joe:
It’s a personal issue. You should have whatever vision board turns you on.
Years ago, after the movie, “The Secret,” came out, Oprah did a show with
Lisa Nichols about making vision boards. Lisa was bold enough to bring her own
on TV for everyone to see, which was somewhat embarrassing for her. She had a
big white poster board with clip art, photos and statements representing what she
wanted pasted on this vision board. For example, she had a photo of the man of her
dreams she wanted to attract, and a photo of the slenderized person she wanted to
be.
There’s no right way to make a vision board, although they’re often done on
white poster board. You can clip pictures of things you’d like to attract from
magazines or books, or even draw them – images like the car of your dreams, a
romantic relationship, or a money sign.
Recently I was at Nexersys, a company that’s created a fun, interactive
martial arts sparring machine that I wanted for my gym. While I was there, I
noticed that every office had a vision board. When I commented on it, they said,
“Oh, we don’t usually show those to people.” Each person had been encouraged to
put up a poster board that included the sales quota they wanted to hit, with photos
of celebrities and other people they wanted to sell their product to.
The whole point is to make it fun and colorful. It should feel emotional and
energetic, in whatever way, shape, or form is easiest for you, so that it gets into
your subconscious mind. Put it some place in your home where you’ll see it often –
by your desk and computer, in the bedroom, or bathroom.
When I was in my teenage years I thought I was going to be the heavyweight
boxing champion of the world, which, 50 years later, sounds funny because I don’t
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even know who the heavyweight boxing champion is anymore. I cut out photos of
the boxers I admired and taped them on my bedroom wall.
At night, I’d begin dozing off while looking at Floyd Patterson or
Muhammad Ali, imagining I was one of the heavyweight boxing champions of the
world, beating these guys. Before I fell asleep, I’d raise my hand in the air like I
had been pronounced the winner. During this time, I got in the best shape and had
some of the proudest athletic moments of my life.
Vision boards are fun, powerful – and anything goes. Just make it thrilling
for you personally. The images are powerful because that’s the language of your
unconscious mind, like a software code. It talks in images,
Adam:
A vision board doesn’t necessarily need to be pictures on a board. It could
also be actual physical objects.
For example, one of my students who worked at a movie theater used
different things there to symbolize what she wanted to attract – the movie screen,
projector, even the podium where she took tickets. Each had a meaning to her, so it
became a 3-D vision board of her goals.
Joe:
You could also take a photo of your board and make it the screen saver on
your iPhone or Blackberry.
Adam:
Maybe that’s a good app idea.
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That’s about all the time we have for today – is there anything else you’d
like to add?
Joe:
This would be a great time to share with everyone what I’ve been up to.
First, my new book, Faith, will be out in October, and The Remembering
Process, which I co-authored, will be out in February. Then, for the last four days,
I’ve been in the recording studio with some of the greatest rock and roll musicians
of all time, recording new songs for my fourth album.
Some of these songs are so powerful and mesmerizing, I believe people can
be transformed just by listening to them, raising them to new heights of ecstasy.
I’ve only been doing this for two years, yet here I am coming out of the gate with
three Grammy winners on this fourth CD.
Adam:
Aligning to Zero puts me in a trance, such a blissful state of happiness and
joy. If this next CD is anything like that, we’re in for a real treat.
Joe:
They seem to get better and better, so I’m very excited and wanted to share
the news.
More importantly, all I’m doing is following my inspiration, and when my
inspiration whispered, “You always wanted to be a musician, why don’t you go do
it now?” I took action.
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Often when I take action, I’m nervous, reluctant, and insecure, like everyone
else. I didn’t have singing or songwriting experience. I knew three chords on the
guitar and no music theory. I’d never worked with professional musicians. I’m
learning new things, stretching myself, and daring something worthy – but the
bottom line is I’m following my inspiration.
Your miracle is right now – and from right now you can follow the
inspiration for the next ones. This is what it’s all about – the magic and miracle
you seek is right now.
Adam:
Joe, thank you so much. It’s been a real blessing to hear from you today.
God bless.
Joe:
Adam, I can’t thank you enough, and love you all. God speed to everybody.
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Secret Session #9
Joe Vitale with Janeen Detrick
Janeen:
Welcome, Joe!
Joe:
Thank you, I’m grateful to be here.
Janeen:
I’ve been hearing a lot lately from students who have entered a relationship
– romantic and business – where their finances are intertwined. So not only are
their lives intertwined through whatever endeavors they have undertaken, but their
finances are now intertwined.
What do you do when that significant other, or business partner, has beliefs
and energy that is not positive or high vibrational in nature and, in fact, is
negative? Can you discuss how a partner’s limiting beliefs affect us?
Joe:
That’s an in-depth question, in the sense that it can help reveal the dynamics
of what’s going on in life.
Basically, the other person in your relationship is a mirror to what is in you.
You’ve attracted them into your life unconsciously. There’s no right or wrong, no
guilt or blame here. In fact, you can celebrate the fact that you are such a powerful
attractor you’ve attracted this other person. When you look at them and see that
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they seem to have limiting beliefs, those limiting beliefs aren’t in them. They’re in
you. This is very powerful to grasp, and we need to so that we can experience an
awakening in life.
The vast majority of people blame others. They say, “I see you have
negativity, and limiting beliefs about money. That’s affecting me.” No, it’s not
affecting you unless you come from a victim mentality. But to be a victor and own
your own power, you have to release all blame, all shirking of responsibility.
So the good news is, first, that you’re a powerful attractor. You attracted this
other person into your life – for business or romance. Second, you can be thankful
that they’re demonstrating to you, out loud and in living color, your own beliefs.
Of course, you might be thinking, “Oh, I don’t have those beliefs. I believe in
prosperity. I believe in positivity.” Maybe consciously you do, but unconsciously
you may not, and this is where the real work has to be done.
This is why I created Miracles Coaching™, to make it easier for people to
sort out these things between their conscious and unconscious minds. Until they
actually deal with what’s in their unconscious mind, they may not fully attract and
keep what they really want.
So whoever you’re in a relationship with, you attracted them. That’s great –
you’re powerful. The other person is a mirror of what’s going on in you, and that’s
great, too, because they’re making your work even easier. Instead of you trying to
explore, “Oh, what do I believe about money?” all you have to do is look at the
other person and listen to what they believe about money, business, romance, or
relationships. They’re vocalizing what you believe at an unconscious level –
otherwise you would not have attracted them into your life. They’re a match to
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what’s going on in your being, what’s going on in the way that you walk through
life.
This is empowerment, taking your power. Not blaming, not being a victim,
but realizing, “Wow, I’m incredibly powerful to attract this partner to reveal my
own programming.” There’s no power in being a victim, no joy, and certainly no
freedom. It’s a dead-end street.
In fact, I had breakfast with Lou Ferrigno, the famous actor who played the
Hulk, and he talked about power and negativity. I said, “In my experience when
people start feeling negative, thinking negative, talking negative, or acting
negative, they lose all power completely. They pull the plug on their very existence
because they become a victim.
Lou looked at me and said, “I have never heard anybody put it that way, but
that is absolutely right. When you start to go into being a victim, and thinking and
acting negative, you lose your power.”
Janeen:
Do you think people are afraid of someone else’s negative belief because
they want to believe in the positive things, and, unconsciously, are afraid of being
what they see in their partner?
Could this be why they attracted a partner who could mirror it for them?
Joe:
Absolutely, we tend to attract what we love and what we fear because
they’re two incredibly powerful emotions. Any thoughts that have that much
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feeling to them get propelled into the universe and we start attracting based on that.
So when you really love something – you attract that thing to you.
For example, I’m loving creating music, singing, my guitars, musicians I’m
playing with – and I’m attracting more music into my life. In fact, I was just voted
the # 9 singer/songwriter in Austin, Texas, which blew my mind because I wasn’t
even trying for it, but here I am. Things like this fall in my lap because I’m loving
music.
The same thing happens when you fear something, because fear has
incredible energy, a deep fire that will attract something to match it. It’s so
important to dissolve your fears, get clear about what you love, and focus on that.
You want to come from love virtually all the time, as much as you can humanly, or
divinely, do.
Janeen:
I often hear from students that when they want to attract the love of their
life, they write these big, long lists of what they want. I can’t help but think, “My
goodness, who but God would qualify?”
The details are so specific and minute that it almost gets to the point where
you wonder if anybody fits these criteria. Given they’re being so nitpicky, could it
be that, underneath, they’re afraid they’re that way themselves? So they write the
opposite traits on their lists?
Joe:
That’s interesting, because what’s really important when it comes to
attracting somebody else is self-love.
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Loving yourself is the number one thing, yet a lot of people come from
desperation. They think, “I have to have somebody. I’m getting older and past my
prime. I don’t want to be alone. I have to have a certain person. And I have to have
them very quickly.” These are just some of the beliefs people have. They make a
long list because of their desperation. I usually suggest that people counteract this
by making a list of all their own positive traits. For example:
o What are reasons for you to love you?
o What is positive about you?
o What do you consider to be your strengths?
o What are your strong points?
You want to be at a point where you are totally okay being alone. This is
powerful. When you can truly love yourself, appreciate and feel grateful for
yourself, and be by yourself – that’s what makes you desirable.
Most people looking for another partner are wounded in some way. They
haven’t made themselves whole yet, so they end up attracting the unconscious
counterpart of the very thing they don’t like in themselves. This is why I suggest
finding what you love in yourself first.
A powerful technique is looking yourself in the eye, in the mirror, and
giving yourself a pep talk. Go over your features and find what you like. Begin
with whatever’s obvious for you and say, “I really love my eyes,” or “I really love
the color of my eyes,” or “I really love my skin.”
Look at your life in the same way, and think about all those cherished
moments when you were at your best and in the flow, moments you felt proud and
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really loved yourself. This is one way of moving towards being grateful for you.
When you’re grateful for you, and you love and appreciate you, you make yourself
whole. From that place, you won’t even have to make a list of what you’re looking
for because you will be embodying the traits of love, care, wisdom, and warmth
that people find attractive. People will just flow into your life until you find the
person that you believe is “the one.”
So rather than making a list of what you want in other people, have a list of
what’s good about you, so that you as the individual feel whole and complete by
yourself.
Janeen:
If you’re whole and complete by yourself, you’ll also attract a person who is
whole and complete.
Joe:
That’s right, and the other person will feel it.
Instead of two desperate people, it will be two whole people who want to
share, which is much more exquisite. It’s the Divine embrace at that point – souls
coming together participating in their own awakening, two people who can be on
the same level.
But when victims get together, they won’t have the most pleasant time, and
the relationship, in all likelihood, won’t last. I’m not saying that it can’t be
resolved because healing and awakening always happen. But using our analogy
here, if wounded people get together, they’re probably going to maintain their
wound, and not heal from it until they heal themselves.
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Janeen:
It’s significant that you said, “Be okay with being alone,” not, “Focus on
being alone.” Your energy isn’t going to create aloneness.
Joe:
That’s a valuable distinction because, you’re right, we’re not attracting
aloneness, or saying that’s the goal or the focus at all.
Being alone simply means being comfortable with yourself. When it’s
Saturday night, for example, and you’re sitting at home eating a TV dinner and
watching a movie, you’re enjoying it because you’re okay with you. You’re totally
at peace being by yourself. Soon enough, you know you’ll be with somebody –
because you’re okay with you.
Janeen:
In your Awakening Course, you offer an interesting perspective about the
ego actually being of service to us, assisting in moving our life forward.
Can you talk more about that?
Joe:
I’d be glad to because I wrestled with the ego for the longest time.
When I was homeless and in poverty, I was also studying and going to the
library (sometimes living at the library to get my shelter), really absorbing all these
different ideas – spiritual teachings, philosophies, metaphysics, psychologies,
slants, theories and theologies – trying to understand it all. A lot of them put down
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the ego, and I’d wrestle with my own, thinking, “Okay, how do you kill off the ego
and live without it?”
Yet, what was I doing? I was coming from ego – while trying to destroy or
control ego.
As humans, most of us go through those periods. It’s a disturbing place to
be, especially when you’re struggling physically and financially to survive, like I
was, and also dealing with the mindset of, “Okay, what’s true about spirituality?”
Trying to kill off your ego is a little bit like playing chess with yourself. It’s your
ego trying to kill the ego, and it knows what you’re up to. It knows every single
maneuver you would try to pull to kill it – and it’s not going to happen.
Ultimately what I realized is that the ego needs to be in service of Divinity.
The unconscious mind is our power center and our conscious mind is basically
where the ego is. The problem is when you let ego try to steer the ship. It’s like the
tip of an iceberg. You can barely see out the window to see water on the horizon,
let alone see the whole ocean, or planet. The ego cannot see the totality of the
universe. The Divine can.
But when the ego says, “I’m looking out the window and see where I want
to go, so I’m going to steer the boat – I’m going to steer your life in this direction,”
that’s problematic. In reality, you’re only looking through a peephole, so you can’t
possibly know how to steer that boat, or your life. The unconscious mind is more
connected to Divinity, and that’s what you want to direct your life, and to
surrender to.
Two years ago, I got a whisper in my ear to start playing music, which I felt
was coming from the Divine. At first, my ego said, “I can’t do that. I’m not a
musician. I love guitars. I have guitars, but I don’t know how to play them. I can’t
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sing. I can’t write songs. I can’t perform. I can’t make an album.” My ego was on
its hind legs, fighting, but the Divine said, “No, it’s time for you to be a musician
and to actually express Divinity and some of your messages through music.”
Once I remembered that my ego is supposed to serve the Divine, it became a
matter of, “Okay, I don’t know how I’m going to do this, but, yes, show me the
way.” I’m led to a music producer who wants to have lunch with me, although I
don’t know that he’s a music producer, and he doesn’t know I want to create an
album when we set it up. We were just reconnecting after a six-year absence.
This is how the Divine orchestrates everything when you let ego serve the
Divine. So when people talk about transcending the ego, they’re not saying, “Kill
the ego. Murder the ego. Squelch the ego. Erase the ego.” They’re saying, “Come
from a higher perspective.” In other words, transcend it.
Transcending the ego means you come from the Divine, that higher place in
you. When you do, the Divine can ask the ego to create music, open your own
restaurant, or write a cookbook – whatever it happens to be for each individual. It’s
different for everyone, but the Divine will inspire you, and this leads to inspired
action.
If I had only listened to my ego, I wouldn’t be where I am now. I wouldn’t
have these books or audios. I wouldn’t have the music or be traveling. I wouldn’t
be interviewed on TV. None of these things would be going on.
So listen to Divinity and let ego serve it. That’s how you transcend the ego –
by letting Divinity lead the way.
Janeen:
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Some traditions suggest that if we kill the ego all together, we’ll dissolve
into nothingness, like we’re not here anymore
Joe:
You need the ego to navigate traffic, drive your car, balance your
checkbook, get through the day, and not walk into walls – but the Divine gives you
the moment-by-moment inspiration to bring all those wonderful miracles you’ve
been longing for, and to help you stay on track for your calling.
When you follow your life path, your God-driven, God-given gift of life
here, then life tends to work. I know that in my own life, when I was fighting
inspiration, the nudging coming from the Divine, my life sucked. It was hard.
That’s when it was difficult and I stayed in poverty.
When I started to surrender the control of my ego, I said, “Okay, Divine. I’m
not making out very well all by myself. Help me out. Show me the way and I will
do it.” That’s when I found the escalator through life, and I’ve been riding it ever
since.
Janeen:
And bringing a lot of us with you.
Can you share more about ways we can quiet the ego so we can receive and
perceive Divine inspirations?
Joe:
My favorite method is Ho’oponopono, which I wrote about in Zero Limits. I
love cleaning and clearing, and do it all the time. It’s the simplest, easiest thing for
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any of us to do. How hard is it to think, “I love you, I’m sorry, please forgive me,
thank you” and just keep it going? It’s designed to erase programs, and by
programs, I mean your beliefs, the software in your mind, so to speak.
This is the magic formula, the combination lock, or “Open sesame” that gets
in there and starts scrubbing the unconscious mind of limiting beliefs. It works
even if you don’t know they’re there because it’s working at the unconscious level.
You don’t have to be able to articulate the beliefs for them to be worked out with
Ho’oponopono.
Clearing the unconscious of limiting beliefs affects the conscious mind –
because thoughts in your conscious mind bubble up from the unconscious. Imagine
a big bathtub with suds floating on the surface. Those suds came from within the
water below, but first someone had to put soap in, add hot water, and stir it. Like
this, the unconscious mind has all these elements creating and bubbling up. Your
thoughts, your ego, are the suds.
Ho’oponopono is a cleansing and rewiring process that removes limiting and
negative programs you’ve gathered as you grew up in the world – even the ones
that Dr. Hew Len says came from our ancestors and are part of our DNA. All of
that is in our system, although we’re not aware of it consciously. If somebody
pulled a DNA sample from you and diagnosed it, they’d probably say, “Oh, yes,
here are elements from your great-great grandmother.” It’s in our lineage.
So when you do Ho’oponopono, that’s what you’re cleaning and clearing.
The great goal is to be so clear that when Divinity speaks through you, you don’t
think, hesitate, or second guess about a call to take action. You just do it because
there’s no interference from the conscious mind thinking, “Oh, should I do it? Am
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I the one? Do I have the money? Do I have the experience? Do I have the time?
What do my neighbors think? What do my parents think?”
Those thoughts are simply the suds bubbling up from that bathtub of
consciousness, programmed in the unconscious mind. Ho’oponopono deprograms
all of that. Dr. Hew Len said if you knew how much cleaning is done when you do
Ho’oponopono, you would never stop. That’s how powerful it is.
Janeen:
I know you have many testimonials about how well Ho’oponopono has
worked.
Does Ho’oponopono give the person the new perspectives, epiphanies, or
“aha” moments that set them free? Or, is it just neutralizing and clearing the old
junk, paving the way so that we can receive edicts?
Joe:
It’s the latter.
Ho’oponopono is clearing and wiping away the suds. It’s cleaning the
windows, pulling down all the spider webs in the mind. It cleans and clears
whatever is blocking us from hearing the voice of God, Divinity, life, or nature,
whatever phrase is most comfortable to use. It’s not giving us a statement or belief.
If anything, it’s the opposite. It’s taking away the beliefs so we can hear reality.
We can hear truth, the rawness of life, where the magic and miracles are. That’s
why I think it's so wonderful.
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It’s a simple, easy technique that I’m doing even as we’re talking, “I love
you. I’m sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you.” I’m cleaning the windows in my
mind so I can see the miracles everywhere around me right now.
Janeen:
It’s quieting the mind chatter and erasing it, so that we get to zero point then.
I feel that’s what we’re doing in Miracles Coaching™, too. We help people
gain a perspective that can open them up to an epiphany.
Joe:
Absolutely, we need Miracles Coaching™ because we need an ally,
somebody objective who’s in our corner.
We need a partner, somebody to reflect back our beliefs and question them,
and encourage us to question them. We need to be reminded to keep doing the very
techniques we know to do. We all need this. I believe that coaching is essential,
and I have my own coaches. In fact, my life didn’t dramatically change until I got a
coach on my side. So, yes, do Ho’oponopono, and do everything you are inspired
to do, but use and rely on your Miracles Coach to accelerate your process.
You’re always going to make progress doing things like Ho’oponopono, but
you’re going to turn on the afterburners and turbocharge your life down the road
when you have a Miracles Coach on your side.
Janeen:
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Sometimes, even when we’ve been at this for a while, there’s a tendency to
worry about things like money. Students have a tendency to get hung up and ask,
“How do I not worry about how I will be provided for?”
Joe:
This is a biggie, and I understand that feeling, but there’s a perception shift
we’ve got to make.
I can remember points in my life where I thought, “I understand everybody
is saying that I’m supposed to trust and the grass grows by itself, but where’s the
money and how’s it going to get to me?”
When you’re feeling desperate, or getting caught up in the “how,” such as,
“How am I going to pay my bills? How am I going to find my romance? How am I
going to heal myself? How am I going to get my new car and my new house? How
am I going to do all these things?” it’s a sign there’s something going on
underneath the surface. What you’re really saying is that you have a fear it’s not
going to work out, or, maybe more specifically, not going to work out for you.
These fears need to be addressed and nipped in the bud because you attract what
you love and what you fear. If you keep on fearing desperation and not attracting
what you want, you will tend to attract more of that in your life.
If you look out your window right now, wherever you are in the world, you
can see God. It may look like trees, buildings, cars, and people walking around. It
may look like puppies and kitties playing. Regardless of what you see, it’s the
miracle of the universe before your eyes. Whatever is out there, a life force keeps it
going. Trees will keep growing, people moving around will keep moving, and dogs
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and cats playing will keep playing. Even the building has a force within it – people
in it working. Wherever you look out the window, life is there.
Then, in this moment, stop and recognize that this same life force is in you.
It’s pumping your heart, moving cells and blood throughout your body, and
keeping your brain alive. You’re reading this. You’re taking in everything. Your
conscious and unconscious mind is working, taking care of you right now. You are
being taken care of right now. Pause and let that sink in.
Of course, at this point, most people think, “Sure, I know my body is taking
care of me, but how is my life being taken care of? How are my bills being taken
care of?” The same force that’s animating everything you see outside your
window, animating your body right now, will take care of your bills as long as you
dissolve your limiting beliefs. The only thing stopping the flow of money, or
romance, or whatever it is that you’re looking for are your beliefs about it.
As you clear those beliefs, the same force that keeps you and everything out
your window alive will allow whatever you’re looking for to come into your life.
You’ll be able to hear the whisperings of the Divine telling you what to do, and
take inspired action towards it.
Although you may not understand this right now, allow it to sink in.
You are already being taken care of.
Your life is a gift.
This moment is a miracle.
All the things you long for will be given to you the more you are grateful for
what you already have, and the more you release negativity, or limiting beliefs and
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programs, in your unconscious mind. The faster you release, the faster you will
attract what you want. The bottom line is, we’re being taken care of already, but
we don’t always know it, or at least acknowledge it.
Janeen:
You’re saying to appreciate what is, and this will alleviate the feeling of
desperation.
Joe:
That’s a great synopsis.
The whole of my message is that when you can appreciate the moment you
have and your being in it, your whole life will transform. But what most people do,
and I’ve done it, too, is look at their life and say, “I appreciate some things. I don’t
appreciate all things. And I really want it to change.” It doesn’t work that way.
You have to be grateful for, and fully present in, this moment – which
includes you, your partner, and whatever you see out the window and around you.
Out of that totality of gratitude, you can then say, “Wouldn’t it be cool if, in my
next moments, I attracted more income, a better job, this relationship, this health,
this home?” Being in the moment with gratitude is the fundamental miracle, and
allows you to more easily attract what you want. But it starts in this moment –
that’s the miracle.
Janeen:
So when we have desperation, we’re looking at what we think we don’t
have. We’re looking at what we’re not, rather than appreciating what is.
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I’ve heard you say many times that the more you see, the more you will see.
Does this work with money? Is that why you encourage us to keep a success
journal?
Joe:
It ties into what we’ve been talking about – that you tend to attract what
you’re already focused on.
If you’re looking out the window, complaining about what you see, you’re
probably going to have moments like that coming up. On the other hand, if you’re
looking out the window and say, “Oh, yes. I do see the tree is beautiful, and that
person walking is wonderful. I see this bird flying. It’s amazing,” you will tend to
see more of that. You simply tend to attract and notice what you’re already
noticing, and this has everything to do with money.
If you see that you have less than the money that you want, you’re going to
tend to notice that from that point on. But if you can look and say, “Thank
goodness I have this much money. It’s more than a lot of people – and some don’t
have any. This amount of money is perfect for me, right here in this moment and
this time,” then that’s what you’ll see more of.
You’ll see more money coming to you because you’re noticing the reality
with gratitude. It’s simply a matter of you receiving more of what you focus on.
So start to refocus on these things:
What you’re grateful for
What’s good
What’s positive
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What you love
What you want to see
Where you want to go
Janeen:
The Science Channel recently had a show about how our eyeballs actually
see, and it’s similar to what you’re saying.
The unconscious mind projects upon the visual cortex, radiates it through the
optic nerve, and bounces it off the lens in our eyeballs so that – literally – our past
memories are being projected onto our future.
In other words, we see what we expect to see. And this, of course, is why
Ho’oponopono is needed – to erase those memories.
Joe:
It’s mindboggling, but that’s the reality of what’s happening.
Consciously we don’t know what’s going on. We can’t steer our ship or
even see where we’re going. Yet that’s what’s going on in our world, in real time,
and how our unconscious processes what’s happening out there. We simply have to
get clear because consciously we don’t have a clue.
Janeen:
All we’re seeing is the past, projected onto the future.
Joe:
Yes, and that’s a dangerous driver.
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Janeen:
A lot of our students have expressed an interest in ways to elevate societal
consciousness. Are there any think tanks, mastermind groups, or things like that
which they could participate in?
Joe:
Yes, a phenomenal amount.
There are movements, organizations, and individuals everywhere doing
wonderful things to heal, awaken, help, and bring wholeness to the planet. To find
them, I’d recommend the book, The Practical Visionary, which lists people and
movements working in many areas of life. I believe it’s available on both Amazon
Kindle and in printed form.
In the area of green energy, for example, people are trying to make solarpowered and water-powered cars. They’re also working with greenhouses and food
production trying to make wholesome, natural food. For example, grains grown
today aren’t like the ones my grandmother used to make pasta when I was a kid.
Our food has changed, and there are people doing something about that.
Water supply is a big issue, as well, especially in foreign countries like
Africa. Actors like Matt Damon put forth time, effort, and money to increase the
water supply and give it to places that need it.
Then there are people working with mass consciousness, which is something
I’ve focused on. If you’ve followed my emails a while, you know there’ve been
several times over the years when I’ve asked my entire list to focus on a result, like
during the fires in Texas with thousands of people were losing their homes. I sent
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out an email asking everyone to focus on rain – and that very day it started to rain.
We received more rain over the next couple of months, and the fires were put out.
Many people in the entertainment industry are working to make movies that
elevate and awaken people. Next month I’ll be attending a meeting for the
Transformative Leadership Council, where hundreds of evolved people, movers
and shakers on the planet, are doing something unique to make a difference,
including the author of The Practical Visionary.
So do some research, read the book, Google different ideas online, and get
educated – but also make quiet time and ask Divinity. Pray for guidance, “What
role would you like me to participate in?”
In a personal example, I’m creating Operation Yes, a movement to end
homelessness in this country. I work with people and make contributions to
different families. While I feel guided to do this, but that doesn’t mean you should
work on homelessness, too.
Just check within yourself and ask, “What do I really care about? What
could I make a difference in?” And you can make it a win-win by asking, “How
can I help the planet and help myself in the process?”
Again, the book, The Practical Visionary, can be inspiring and a great
brainstorming tool.
Janeen:
Can you tell us more about the Transformative Leadership Council?
Joe:
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It’s a group that Jack Canfield (co-author of Chicken Soup for the Soul) and
others started years ago. They’re self-help, personal growth, and highly evolved
spiritual teachers, people you’ve seen on TV or read. We get together to rest and
relax, exchange notes, and talk about what we’re doing.
For example, a year ago I taught everybody Ho’oponopono, and now they’re
sharing it with other people. It’s a way to share information so it goes downstream,
and a great organization.
Janeen:
Joe, it’s been absolutely luscious being here with you. Thank you.
Joe:
You’re welcome, Janeen.
Remember to stay the course because magic and miracles are here now –
just open your eyes, look out the window, and there they are. God speed to all of
you.
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Secret Session #10
Joe Vitale with Gregory Downey
Gregory:
Without further ado – welcome, Joe.
Joe:
Thank you. It’s great to be here. I always look forward to getting together to
share our stories, insights, and wisdom – so let’s share the love.
Gregory:
Absolutely, the floor is yours.
Joe:
Well, let’s start dancing.
First, I’d like to get everybody on the same page and be here now. So take a
deep breath, let it out slowly, and realize that, in this moment, there’s nothing else
for you to do, nowhere else for you to go.
Focus on something you feel grateful for right here, right now. It could be
the fact that you’re sitting or standing or laying wherever you’re at. Just find
something you’re genuinely grateful for and get into the feeling of gratitude.
Let that expand through your body, feeling grateful for this moment. You are
in this moment. There’s nothing for you to do right now. Whatever was going on is
gone for the moment. You are here, and you are feeling grateful for whatever item
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or experience you’ve chosen. Gratitude is the single most powerful thing you can
do to transform yourself in any moment, and you can do it right now.
I’m inviting you to be here in this moment, and to take in what we’re about
to share.
Gregory:
I’m thankful for the early snow we’ve gotten the past couple of days because
we didn’t get much moisture during the summer. The changing of the seasons is
here, and the snow is letting us know that winter is upon us and we can look
forward to more moisture.
I’m grateful for this time of year as we move into the holiday season. It’s a
time for family and friends, sharing and celebration. Regardless of what holidays
are observed this season, it’s a time when we reflect on, and are grateful for, the
world around us.
And speaking of the holidays, what are some things people can do to deal
with all the overspending, or crazy holiday schedules and activities?
Joe:
First, remind yourself that you’re the one in control of your schedule, and
you don’t have to do everything. For example, I get invited to lots of events, but
often prefer to be by myself at home. I’m very picky about where I go, and don’t
want to overstress myself.
As far as overspending, refuse to do it. It’s not worth getting into a place
where you’re feeling desperate or tapping out credit cards. Sometimes the greatest
gifts are the ones you don’t buy, and create yourself.
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For example, about forty years ago, when I was in college and had next to no
money, I wanted to give my father something for his birthday, so I wrote a letter by
hand and mailed it. He still has that letter, and it astonishes me that he repeatedly
talks about it. It meant more to him than anything I ever bought for him, or
anything I could have bought for him.
So, rather than a spending spree, why not go on a creativity spree? I’ve had
people make me a scarf by hand, cookies, and other gifts. So I’d be thinking more
in terms of what would be fun that you could create. Maybe write a poem or short
story for a friend – or make lasagna.
The point is you don’t need to spend a lot of money, go into debt, or tap out
credit cards, and you certainly don’t need to be feeling stressed. That’s not the
purpose of the holidays. I would focus on feeling love and gratitude, and find ways
to express that through some sort of free, or almost free, creative expression.
Gregory:
It could be writing a song, playing guitar, and serenading your loved one.
I have six children ranging from ages one to thirteen, and my wife
established a tradition in our family that each of our children make, find, or create
something for each other at Christmas. So we’ll go on a nature walk as a family,
and the kids are encouraged to find something they think would be fascinating or
interesting to one of their siblings. There’s energy in that – energy that may not be
transferred when buy a DVD player, for example.
It’s like the letter you wrote your dad. When you put your pen to the paper, a
part of you goes into that.
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Joe:
Yes, that’s one of the greatest gifts.
Gregory:
In terms of getting stressed with schedules and the amount of activities, like
you said, you learn where to say no, set up boundaries, and invite people to come
to your place sometimes. Don’t feel like you have to go to everybody else’s house
and fit their schedule. You’re not going to make everybody happy all of the time.
Given that some of the events around holidays often involve more family
time, how can people manage their energy and thoughts around negative family
members?
Joe:
First, keep in mind that these other people, the ones you’re calling negative,
represent a part of you that you’re not owning in the moment. Reality, as you
perceive it, is a mirror reflection of your unconscious beliefs and thoughts.
When you come across people that appear negative, the reason it’s bothering
you is that the negativity is in you. The problem isn’t that the other person is
voicing negativity or complaining, but that it’s pushing a button in you. Rather
than blame them, simply acknowledge to yourself that they’re doing you a
wonderful service by showing you where you have work to do.
Once you have that understanding, you can look at them far more detached,
almost like a curiosity, and not get caught up in whatever they’re saying. You’ll be
unperturbed. This is one of my favorite words – imperturbability, which means
you’re not bothered by outside circumstances.
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This is where the internal work of looking at your own belief system will
really make a difference for you. It goes back to paying attention to any negative
thoughts, and noticing and separating yourself from them. You can even make a
game of it with other people. When you’re at work, or a family gathering over a
holiday, and people start talking about negativity, take control and change the
subject, or find something more positive to talk about.
For example, Lou Ferrigno, the actor who played the Hulk, recently visited
me. I noticed he kept asking questions, such as, “What time of the morning do you
get up? What do you do next, and after that what do you do, and after you have
your coffee what do you do?”
He also asked me about my relationship. “How long have you known
Nerissa? How long have you been married?” Then, we discovered we had a mutual
interest in a famous bodybuilder, Steve Reeves, and he asked me about that. He
controlled the conversation, but he did it out of genuine, loving curiosity. It made
me feel important, and it kept the conversation on positive ground.
You can do this with anybody by showing positive interest in them. You
don’t have to talk about whatever negative thing they might bring up – just find
something positive to talk about.
As a last resort, you can walk away – and I’ve done it. I’ve been at family
gatherings where I’ve used all of my techniques, and at a certain point had to say to
myself internally, “I guess I have some work to do on myself yet. I don’t know
where else to take the conversation, so I’m going for a walk.”
There’s nothing wrong with this. It’s not about blaming anybody, or
thinking they’re wrong or negative – it’s about realizing they represent a part of
you, and using it as a personal development exercise.
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Gregory:
Sometimes people struggle with their family, so it’s a good opportunity to
grow.
For example, a student told me she went to a family reunion and saw people
she hadn’t seen in years. During that interim, she’d made positive life changes, and
even written a book. She said, “The energy was really weird. A lot of these people
had an impression of me from 10 years ago. When I was around them, I started
questioning myself. It made me wonder, ‘Am I really who or what I think I am?
Am I really great at what I do?’”
Her impression was that she was picking up energy from them that was
clouding her collective thought energy field. She said, “It’s no wonder I distance
myself from these individuals.” She ended up leaving, feeling that what she was
picking up was a reflection of the fact that she had progressed and they had not.
What do we do, though, if we live or work with negative people and can’t
get away from them? How do we handle the negativity?
Joe:
We’ve got to remember that these people are actually helping us, and that
takes a giant leap in total responsibility.
I know how easy it is to say, “Hell, no, they’re not helping me; they’re
bringing me down, like poison to my wellbeing,” but the truth of the matter is
they’re showing you where you have some work to do. I think it was Ram Dass,
one of the great spiritual teachers and authors, who said, “If you really want to
know if you’re enlightened or not, go back and visit your family.”
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Your family knows your hot buttons and how to push them. They know how
you think, your behavior, and your patterns. But when you’ve cleaned and cleared
yourself – healed yourself – you can go back to those situations and not be
perturbed at all. It’s simply your belief system that gets triggered by people who
know how to trigger it. So it’s you that needs to be changed, not other people, and
this is why we’re all in Miracles Coaching™ working on ourselves. We’re
dismantling the software in our brain that has that kind of wiring.
I’ve worked on myself so much that when I go back to family gatherings
now, usually nothing happens – no buttons get pushed, and I can be totally at bliss.
If a conversation is going in a way I don’t care to indulge in, I walk away and don’t
participate. People can be in victimhood, and I’ll be detached from it. I can sit
there and do Ho'oponopono inside myself saying, “I love you. I’m sorry. Please
forgive me. Thank you.” I’ll work on myself in the hopes that it will help them, but
I’m not getting my buttons pushed. That’s the lesson.
The real work is when you’re around people that you call negative.
Remember, you only perceive them as negative because they’re pushing your
buttons, and, really, it’s a great gift. It’s an opportunity to talk with your Miracles
Coach and say, “Help me dismantle the wire, the button in me, so I can go back
and visit my brother, my sister, my parents, my friends, high school people, and
not be perturbed – in fact, maybe even think it’s funny.”
Gregory:
It’s easier to forgive somebody if you look at what you’ve gained, and how
you’ve grown as an individual as a result of your interaction.
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Rather than assign meaning and judgment to their behaviors, or to how
you’ve been affected, the key is to see who you are as a result of that relationship,
and learning to be grateful for the ways in which you’ve grown.
I went through this with my own father. He was an extremely negative
individual and we had a terribly challenged relationship. I would use it as a way of
excusing my lack of progress in my life and being a victim. One of the ways I
overcame that was to recognize that having him as a father, and being raised in that
household, helped me learn to pick myself up. When the chips are down, I take the
opposite role and refuse to be a victim. My father was who he was so I could be
who I am today.
Joe:
Yes, we get thrown into these families, but who knows who set it up? Maybe
we chose it before we were born so that it would help us build our strength. We
don’t know. The bottom line is it ends up being something good for us, and I love
that.
Gregory:
Yes, rather than looking at it from a victim stance, I see the many ways that
people have helped me by being who they are.
Sometimes when I’m saying Ho'oponopono, in the back of my mind I’m
thinking, “I am so sorry that you have to endure the suffering that you’re enduring
so that I can learn to become who I need to be, who I’m supposed to be, in this
life.” And, at the same time, I’m grateful. I believe we’re all connected, and
gratitude is the gateway to forgiveness.
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Joe:
Yes, I believe gratitude is the most powerful thing you can do – and you can
do it anywhere, anytime.
Even in situations that seem negative or desperate, just pause, take a deep
breath, and find something in that moment to be grateful for and focus on it. It
could be for the turkey drumstick on the table, or a kitty cat walking by. There’s
always something, and focusing on it and feeling grateful will expand the energy in
you so that you start to feel grateful all the way through your body. Your
perception will completely change.
Gregory:
It’s interesting you mentioned the turkey drumstick.
I’ve been reading the book, Messages from Water and the Universe, about
the concept of blessing and giving gratitude for your food. My take on that is it
changes the physical and emotional relationship that you have with your food. As a
result, your food affects you differently, which is amazing, especially if you’re
someone who has struggled with weight, like I have.
Over the years I have learned to change my emotional relationship with food
through gratitude, and my body was able to release the excess weight I was holding
onto.
Joe:
That same thing can happen with your relationship with people.
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Just as you experienced your relationship with food changing because of
having gratitude towards food, your relationship to other people changes when you
have gratitude for other people. It’s the same formula in another dimension.
Gratitude works on all levels and in all situations. I don’t care what the
problem is – feel grateful for it, and include the people you originally perceived as
negative. Find something to be grateful for in them and, at that moment, you will
transform yourself, as well as them.
Gregory:
I agree 100% that how we respond to other individuals gives them an
opportunity to change and to grow, and to expand themselves.
It’s especially important, as we go into the holidays, because we increase our
contact with people, whether we’re shopping or in the bank. It’s a time of year to
be more cognizant and empathetic toward people, and to show extra appreciation
and gratitude for what they may be going through.
Is there something we can do on a consistent basis to manage our thinking
throughout the day and stay more present – a way to train our mind and keep it
from going down negative thought paths?
Joe:
If you’re thinking negatively, it’s because of your past training. You’ve
learned how to think that way largely because you overheard other people talking,
which reflected their thoughts, and you concluded this is how the world thinks.
And, for most of us, it’s usually in a line of negativity. We’re critical of ourselves,
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we’re critical of others. We look from a “What if it all goes wrong?” kind of
scenario more often than not.
So the first thing to do is pay attention to it. Notice how you’re thinking and,
as you’re noticing it, you’ll start to become aware that you’re suffering from your
thinking – and that’s a big, powerful clue as to what to do about it.
In other words, there’s your thinking, and then there’s your observing of
your thinking. Some part of you is separate from your thoughts. You’ve got
thoughts going on in your head, but you’re also the observer, the witness, to those
thoughts. This gives you great control because now you can start to realize, “Oh,
I’m not my thinking. I’m actually observing my thinking.”
Next, begin to train yourself to think in a more positive way. Part of it will
happen naturally because, as you notice your thoughts, you’ll begin to realize, “I
don’t really care for those thoughts that are coming by, the negative ones, so let me
just let those slide on by, and start creating new thoughts.” This is all within your
control.
I’ve talked many times about a favorite process of mine called “What if up?”
It’s from the book, What If It All Goes Right? by Mindy Audlin. The idea is to start
thinking along the lines of, “What if it all goes right? What if this all works out?
What if my day is fantastic? What if the next few moments are the ones that really
open up my heart and change the course of my life? What if the miracles are right
here and they’re also coming around the corner?”
In contrast, most of us have “What if down?” thoughts such as, “What if it
doesn’t go right?” When you have thoughts like this that pull you down, you can’t
help but feel it because your energy drops. You’re not as happy, or confident about
what’s going to be happening next.
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You can take control of your thoughts and ride them like a horse in a new
direction. Instead of dropping the energy, you raise the energy when you have
thoughts like, “What if it goes right? What if this works out? What if I get the
deal? What if I get the raise? What if I get the car? What if I get the romance?
What if I get healthy?” You can “What if” yourself in a positive direction to raise
your vibration.
So right off the bat, I’d say be aware of your thoughts. Realize that you are
separate from your thoughts, and start to train yourself to have more positive ones.
If you catch a negative one, say something to the effect of, “Hey, thanks for
sharing. See you around,” and then replace it with a thought you prefer having.
Gregory:
Students are often skeptical and will say things like, “The odds are this
whole thing is going fall apart,” so we work with them to reverse that skepticism.
Humans have a natural tendency towards skepticism, and you can use this to
be skeptical of a negative outcome. You can say to yourself, “You know, the odds
are it’s not going to fall apart, or go badly. The odds are this person isn’t going to
leave me” or whatever the natural skepticism might be.
Joe:
That’s a brilliant technique, and when you do that, it demonstrates that you
have control.
Most of our thinking is so habitual, we don’t question it, but here we’re
saying, “Hey, let’s question it. Let’s redirect it, move it in a new direction, and
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show it who’s boss.” You’re the person observing the thoughts, and the opening is
in being aware you’re not them. You do have choice.
Gregory:
A lot of people condemn themselves because of their thoughts, as though it’s
part of their identity.
I tell my students, “Not only are you not your thoughts, you’re not your
actions or your behavior. You don’t have to identify yourself by something that
you did in the past, as long as you’re not doing that thing anymore.”
Joe:
Exactly, and I’ll take it a bit further.
When I decided to be a songwriter two years ago, I took a workshop with
Ray Wylie Hubbard, a well-known singer-songwriter. He talked about thoughts
that will show up in your mind, thoughts I was having, like, “I’m not a songwriter
or singer. I can’t do that.”
The way he handles it is by asking himself, “Where’s the proof? Where’s the
proof that you can’t do that?” When he said that, I thought, “My God, he’s right. I
have no evidence whatsoever that I can’t sing, play the guitar, record music, or
write my own song. There’s no evidence.” And I did, in fact, prove myself wrong.
I have four CDs out now, and am about to record a fifth.
By questioning those thoughts and realizing, “Those are thoughts and that’s
not reality,” I could actually “What if up?” and say, “What if I do write songs that
are really great? What if I do start singing and it turns out to be profound?” That
felt better and enabled me to get into the studio.
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It’s all a matter of paying attention to your thoughts and not believing them.
You are separate from them. Choose the ones that empower you and let them help
you get to where you want to go.
Gregory:
Is there any truth to the concept that we become what we think about most
of the time so, therefore, we need to learn to control or guide our thinking? Or, is
the concept of controlling and guiding your thinking a form of resistance?
For example, let’s say I’m trying to think more on purpose, and decide to
carry a 3 x 5 card with bullet points from my vision statement, or I write down
things I’m grateful for. Then, while I’m pumping gas, I pull out the card because I
don’t want my mind to wander off. I want to direct it towards things I want. Is that
a little forced and contrived, or is that a good principle?
Joe:
It’s outstanding and, in fact, I’d make it even simpler.
You don’t even have to pull the card out and read it – just reach into your
pocket and touch it. That’s all you need to do to remind yourself of your goals.
You’ve already read them and written them down, so subconsciously, you already
know what they are. You’re just reminding yourself of them. Also, numerous
books and teachers talk about writing your goals and putting them everywhere – on
your mirror and computer, the back of your phone, or in a software program that’ll
pop up on your phone or computer.
Any of these are useful techniques to learn to control your mind. At first, it
might seem a little contrived because, generally, we like to float through life. And
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certainly there’s nothing wrong with floating through life if you’re already thinking
positive, feeling grateful, and realizing miracles – already happy, healthy, and at
peace. However, most of us aren’t.
We’re still in the struggling stages of trying to leave victimhood and become
more empowered and awakened, so having all the tools available is wise. They
help you get to where you want to go – even something as simple as having a card
with the word grateful on it, and throughout the day touching it to remind yourself
to find gratitude in the moment. Whatever keeps you focused in the right direction
is useful, until one day you’ll wake up and realize that your mind’s already there.
For example, it’s incredibly rare for me these days to have to do anything
with my mind in terms of redirecting thoughts because they’re all going in a
positive direction. But when I was homeless and in poverty, I felt melancholy and
miserable – even suicidal. People would see me and say, “You look depressed and
unhappy.”
This never happens today because of all the work I did and all the tools I
use, including putting the card in my pocket. I’d put pictures on the mirror, create
vision boards, read positive books, listen to positive audios, and tune into the right
programs. I didn’t have Miracles Coaching™ then, otherwise I would have
enrolled in it myself just to help me turbocharge and accelerate the process of
transformation.
Gregory:
A lot of students get confused in the beginning about the idea of controlling
their thinking. They’ll say, “If you’re trying to control your thinking, doesn’t that
take you out of flow?”
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It’s counterintuitive, but current habits require you to do something else
enough times that those become habitual, replacing the old, and now you’re in a
new flow.
Joe:
Yes, that’s the whole point.
When I was in college and unhappy, I remember a friend of mine saying I
was “naturally pessimistic.” Yet, today, people say, “Joe, you’re naturally
optimistic.” But wait a minute, which is it? Am I naturally pessimistic or am I
naturally optimistic? Forty years ago, I was naturally pessimistic because that was
my flow based on my thought patterns at that time. As I worked on it, took control
and changed it, a new flow took place. Now I am naturally optimistic.
There’s a clue here. If everything’s working fine for you, you’re happy,
getting the results you want, everything is blissful, and you’re experiencing
gratitude and miracles, then, hey, stay in that flow. If, however, you’re having
struggles, bumps in the road, and moments of despair, struggle, or uncertainty,
with no miracles, happiness, or health – then you need to do something about that.
Take control, redirect your mind, your energy, your vibration, until it becomes the
new flow. When it’s the new flow, let go and enjoy.
Gregory:
It’s like when you hear someone say, “Oh, he’s a natural born salesman.”
Joe:
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People tell me, “Joe, you’re a natural born writer,” and I think, “Maybe it
looks like that now.”
I can remember when I was in high school putting myself through a selfstudy program, walking to the library a mile and a half away. I’d stay in there all
day writing books and articles, most of which were not very good. In reality, they
may have even been atrocious, but I was practicing writing. I kept doing it because
I was learning the new flow, creating a habit that was teaching me a new skill.
Now fifty years later, it looks like, “Oh, he was born writing.” Well, no, I
wasn’t.
Gregory:
They’re not seeing the journey.
Joe:
Or the struggle.
Gregory:
Hearing experiences like this definitely helps me take things to heart,
because sometimes it can seem like there are too many outside factors to have any
obvious influence over our life.
For example, how do we change our beliefs about our ability to earn more at
our job? What if someone’s earning potential is restricted to receiving a raise or
getting a promotion?
Joe:
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I remember working for a big oil company in Houston decades ago, at a time
when I was reading prosperity books. I’d read about having money and riches
beyond my reach, more than I ever imagined in my life, and think, “How? I’m
earning a particular salary. There’s a ceiling on how much I can earn. How can
more money come to me?”
The thing to realize is that we’re stuck in a one dimensional thought pattern
when we think money can only come from that particular source. I think it’s Bob
Proctor who says, “Money doesn’t come to you from the company that you work
for. It comes to you through them. It’s one means of receiving more.”
When I first heard that I thought, “Well, that’s a mind expanding thought,
but I still don’t get it because I’m working for this company. Money’s coming
through them and there must be money available elsewhere, but how do I attract it?
How do I receive it?” As I did more work, I was able to realize I was only seeing a
tiny sliver of a gigantic pie, thinking that the only possible way in the entire
universe for me to receive money was through my position at that job.
It took me a while to expand my mind and say, “Wait a minute. What if I did
something else instead of that job, or in addition to that job?” That’s when I wrote
my first book, which gave me another avenue of money. Then I started speaking
about that book, and that gave me yet another avenue. And it didn’t stop there
because I went on to do consulting around that topic, bringing in more money. All
of this happened while I still worked for the oil company – that’s the punch line.
So instead of thinking, “I’m stuck at this job, and the only money I can get,
or the ceiling on the amount of money I can get, is what the company is giving me
and has determined that I will receive,” expand that and say, “Well, right now, I
am working for that company, but that’s not all that’s available to me. What else
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would I like to do?” In my case, it was writing a book, speaking, and then
consulting, which created other streams of income.
The world has so many possibilities it would stagger the conscious mind. All
you have to do is recognize that it can come to you in other ways, not just from
your vocation – although, remember, your company can always change, too, and
offer you more. They can change their rules, increase the pay, or give you some
sort of bonus. There are all sorts of possibilities just in that realm.
However, you can expand further and say, “Wait a minute, the universe
could surprise me by somehow giving me money from some place I can’t even
imagine.” The whole point is that it’s possible, once you realize it’s an unlimited
universe, and who you are in it.
Gregory:
In 1958, in his book, The Strangest Secret, Earl Nightingale taught that we
just have to focus on giving value in all the areas we can, whether that’s at our job,
or simply to people we come into contact through kind words.
He said that most of the time the wealth and abundance you receive will
come to you through sources other than the individual that you’re directly serving
– that you could give service to one person, but the compensation, or reward,
would come from a completely different source that the universe has determined
for you.
Joe:
That’s a wonderful point and I’m glad you brought it up.
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Trust is definitely involved here, along with faith and creativity. You have to
get out of a limited mindset because the world of possibilities is right there waiting
for you. Opening your mind, taking action on your dreams, and following your
passion are all clues to that extra wealth that you seek.
Gregory:
I tell students that if they want to receive more from the universe, it requires
a trade or exchange – even if they’re not sure the action they’re taking is the right
one, or going to result in anything. The universe will recognize it.
The universe looks at merit and will reward an individual because of their
intention and their willingness to sacrifice time, energy, and effort toward a worthy
goal. As long as they’re doing something, taking action, and moving forward,
that’s the key. Let go of the attachment to outcome and just put forth an effort.
Joe:
Yes, serve more and give more – those are the mantras.
Gregory:
You’ve been doing that a long time through both your Hypnotic Marketing
ideas, and teaching other internet marketers how to use the Law of Attraction in
their online marketing efforts. You’ve helped individuals make millions of dollars
online – literally, millions upon millions.
Joe:
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Thank you for acknowledging that – a lot of people who know me from the
spiritual, Law of Attraction side don’t know that I’m also an internet marketer.
I was doing that first, before “The Secret” came along, and after I was in that
movie, I was blown into outer space, so to speak.
Gregory:
That brought you out of the online marketing underground, so now you’re
known among people in all kinds of other industries.
In fact, a lot of our Miracles Coaching™ students are building a business,
either online or offline, and they come to us because we also offer a wonderful
coaching program that deals with Hypnotic Marketing, alongside using the Law of
Attraction in marketing. We can address so many needs for people, from the
deeper spiritual side to the nuts and bolts of an online business.
For example, one of our students wanted to know why your e-mails appear
in small columns. He asked, “Is this a Hypnotic Marketing technique, or is this just
the way that it looks in my e-mail?”
Joe:
I do it on purpose because my e-mails are going to hundreds of thousands of
people all over the world, each using different devices to read the e-mail – iPhone,
iPad, Mac, PC, Samsung – you name it.
I wrote one of the first books on internet marketing in 1995, so I’ve been
doing this a long time. I’ve learned that the most common denominator is to use a
column-like approach in my e-mail, so that when you open it, you can read it easily
and effortlessly. Without that, the e-mail can appear broken up, which makes it
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difficult to read. I’ve seen e-mails that are like magazine articles, where the text
runs all the way across the screen and it gets broken up. People end up struggling
to read it and often don’t get past the first couple of lines.
So I do it for ease – it makes the writing and reading much breezier.
Gregory:
I also understand that, from a marketing standpoint, if an e-mail looks
convoluted and has long sentences, people automatically don’t want to read it.
Joe:
Yes, that’s right.
Gregory:
We’re getting close to the end of our time together today, and on that note,
I’d like to ask a powerful question that came from one of our students, “I know
intellectually that there is no such thing as deservingness, but can you help me get
that into my feelings? I do Ho'oponopono, but I still feel that I must earn universal
favor.”
Joe:
I believe there is such a thing as deservingness, but I also believe it’s your
birthright.
In other words, because you’re here, because you’ve been given this gift of
life – the most majestic miraculous indescribable gift of the cosmos – you deserve
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everything that life offers. You’ve won the great lottery of life, and, as a result, you
get to have all of the gifts. The deservingness is built in.
When people try to establish some sort of criteria for deservingness, for
example, when they say, “I want a new car, but I don’t deserve it because I haven’t
earned it, or I haven’t done the right thing,” or whatever, that’s a fabrication of the
mind. It’s simply a thought system that’s twisting things around, keeping us down
or in misery.
This moment is the miracle we’re all seeking. The very fact that you’re here
in this moment is part of the gift of life. You deserve everything that you desire
and dream automatically. There are no pre-qualifications in the Divine life. God
isn’t asking you to fill out an application before you get your car, or anything else.
Nobody is saying you have to take a test before you can get your new car, home,
job, or whatever it is that you want.
Your mind can do that, however, and this is where you want to shine the
light and pay attention. That’s a form of negative, limiting programming that you
want to, and can, release. Once you realize that you can have what you want
simply because you want it, you’ve made a very powerful statement. I’m going to
even repeat it.
You can have what you want simply because you want it.
No other rationalizations are needed. No other testing, qualifications,
evidence, or proof. This is empowering.
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Whatever qualifiers your mind might throw out, you’ve got to tell yourself
that it’s your mind saying that. You don’t have to justify anything to anybody. You
are here. That’s the great gift. That is the miracle. You deserve it all.
So the dreams that bubble up from inside you, whether you call it your
intuition or your gut – however you think of it – those heartfelt experiences are for
you, that is your birthright. That’s part of the gift, part of deservingness. No kind of
pre-qualification is necessary.
Gregory:
What a wonderful principle.
Joe, thank you so much for joining me here to sharing this beautiful wisdom
with everyone.
Joe:
Thank you, I’m grateful for being here. God speed to all of you.
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Secret Session #11
Joe Vitale with Gregory Downey
Gregory:
Joe, we just had a two-day Awakening Prosperity Bootcamp attended by a
group of Miracles Coaching™ students from all over the United States and
Canada, even Ireland. It was an amazing experience – people bonded, forged new
relationships, and awakened old ones.
In the feedback we’ve received, many students said they came in as one
person and left as an entirely new individual. The Miracles Coaching™ program
makes many of these awakenings possible for our students.
We’re grateful for both our students and you, and the material you provide.
Joe:
That’s thrilling to hear, so thank you for sharing this.
I like to start these sessions with gratitude, even a meditation, because that’s
the single most powerful thing any of us can do to have an awakening right now.
Almost all of us are seeking something, and when we’re doing that, we’re out of
this moment. We’re looking down the road to the next thing, overlooking the
power, magic, and miracle of the moment right now.
It’s good to pause and take inventory, like you did in sharing about the
event, where we can talk about, or relive it, in a sense, that’s a moment for
gratitude we can all experience.
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So just for a moment, let’s take a deep breath, let it out, and realize there’s
nowhere else to go. Focus on this moment. Look around the room and see things
you can be grateful for – a physical object, like a phone or computer, or for
something that happened today. It could be for the fact that you have a roof over
your head, or for what you ate today. Maybe somebody smiled at you today or said
something nice…whatever it happens to be.
It’s by honing in to – and locking in on – this moment that awakenings can
take place. That’s what it’s all about.
Gregory:
One of the things I am grateful for is nature, particularly at this time of year
when I can get out, decompress, and feel my connection with the universe. I
especially appreciate the energy of the water I love to fish in. It gives me the
opportunity to get out of the daily grind and to be at one with my thoughts and my
intentions.
I am reminded of this as I look at a piece of art given to me by a friend,
which has a poem inscribed on it:
“Big fish swim in this river, foraging on a bed of gravel, in a rippling
blanket of water. We’ve sought them and we’ve caught them. As I stand on
the rocky bank, I become mesmerized by the sounds and vision of the river,
and the land it travels through. I look to the west as the trout rise against the
setting of the sun, the clouds roll over the ridge into the valley, and I sense
in the periphery of my thoughts that we are heading home without filling our
limits, only because we do not have any.”
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When I look at that I am constantly grateful for nature, good friends, and for
those things we share and bring us together. On days when I feel trapped and pent
up in the daily grind, I am grateful I have this release and outlet. I can go out and
be one with nature, expressing gratitude for the creation around me.
Joe:
I love nature, too.
I just bought the two acres adjacent to my property after wanting it for the
longest time. I’m grateful to be able to have that property, so I can continue my
experience of communion with nature. I didn’t want anybody to build on it or cut
down trees. I wanted to be able to enjoy it, to respect the land and trees, and the life
within them.
Gregory:
Speaking of nature and getting out, I understand you’ve been traveling.
Joe:
Yes, usually I’m in my studio working, so this is a change.
I have two new books coming out next year, and, more importantly, I’ve
been working on my music. I have four albums out now. The fourth was released a
few weeks ago, so I traveled to Nashville and had a Grammy award-winning
engineer master those songs on the CD. I had a blast doing music and checking out
guitar stores.
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Then I flew out to Los Angeles, where an early morning CBS television
news show interviewed me about my book, Attract Money Now. While there, I had
another Grammy award-winning engineer mix the music on my most recent CD.
Gregory:
Are you talking about the album you did with the drummer, Joe Vitale?
Joe:
Yes. I did two CDs with him, and he’s also on the most recent CD called
“The Healing Song.” [You can listen to all 11 sample tracks at
www.thehealingsong.com].
Joe Vitale is a world famous drummer who happens to have the same name
as me. He’s been a gift from the gods. This man has 40 or 50 years of experience
in rock and roll. He’s Neil Young’s drummer, Sammy Hagar’s drummer, he’s
played for every rock and roll legend – and he’s on my CD!
We’ve become great friends and it’s been a joyous experience. He doesn’t
just play the drums. He can play the keyboard, he knows about engineering, he has
suggestions on different things you can do with the music, and he’s a nice guy to
boot. He offered all kinds of ideas and contributions. It was phenomenal.
Later I went to New York, where there were two giant internet marketing
conventions going on at the same hotel. That’s when I realized I’ve been living in
the woods for a very long time – that many people in New York City overwhelmed
me. New York alone is overwhelming, but the hotel was just swamped with people
and activity. One morning when I called, they said it would be three and a half
hours for room service!
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Then I was in Canada to give a presentation to my peers, the
Transformational Leadership Council. I was invited to speak about one of my
books coming out next year called The Remembering Process. That was the first
time I have given that presentation anywhere on the planet. My wife, Nerissa,
recorded it so you can watch it on YouTube or my website.
Gregory:
That’s awesome, because it means more people can hear your message and
take advantage of Miracles Coaching™.
Joe:
It’s an exciting time to be alive.
Gregory:
I have a series of questions from our coaching students, so let’s jump into
them.
First, how do you deal with self-doubt?
So many people don’t believe they can be successful, start a business, or live
a fulfilling life – yet they desperately want these things in their lives.
Joe:
The key word here is desperately – and that’s where you want to look first.
When people are feeling desperate, they send off energy that things aren’t
going to work out. In fact, they don’t believe anything is going to work out – and
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that’s why they’re feeling desperate. It’s signaling that deep inside they suspect
success might be out there for other people, but not for them.
Drop desperation from your energy field and, instead, come from a feeling
of love, trust, and faith. I believe that faith is such an important aspect, I recently
wrote an entire book about it. (Faith, released February 2013).
So before anything, watch your language because it reveals what’s going on
in your inner state. Part of the reason you’re feeling desperate is because you’re
saying it. As you start to change your language, you’ll start to change your
experience.
You can neutralize those overpowering energies and relax into the moment
by focusing on gratitude. This brings you back into the now where everything is
entirely fine. From here, you can look around and tell yourself, “Oh, I am actually
doing just fine. I’m okay, I’m living and breathing, everything is going fine. I’m in
Miracles Coaching™, focused on my dreams. I’m going forward and I’m going to
make miracles.” When you do this, you dilute the feeling of desperation.
The next thing to realize is that you’re already a success. Sometimes this is
tough for people to get, but regardless of who you are, or where you are, if you’ll
stop and reflect over the course of your life, you’ll see that you have already done
more, accomplished more, and succeeded in more things than many other people.
I recently met with a celebrity who’s been in the world doing some fantastic
things for over 12 years, but as he sat in my office, he said he felt like a failure.
When I asked him how he could feel that way, he pointed out that he had not yet
achieved what he really wants.
Look at the dynamics here. This man is already a success in people’s eyes,
mine included, yet he was dismissing all of his background, his years of
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experience, everything he’s already accomplished. He was only focusing on where
he wanted to go.
That’s a mental torture trap. Not only will you hurt yourself, you’ll find it
difficult to move forward and achieve what you want because you’ve locked
yourself up. Your energy is in desperation and, coming from that feeling, nothing
is going to work out.
I shared a favorite phrase with him that I got from a woman in Maui years
ago. She said, “I’m totally satisfied, I just want more.”
When you come from that kind of mentality, you can sit right where you are,
no matter who you are, look at your life and say, “I’ve been a success. I went to
school, I have a job, and I’ve managed to grow in whatever position I am at in
life.”
Do you realize how many people don’t have jobs, or haven’t gone to school,
and still want to? They want some of the experiences and education that you
already have and are taking for granted. This is why it’s so important to realize
you’re already a success. You’ve succeeded in getting to where you are.
Yes, you may want more – and there’s nothing wrong with wanting more.
That’s what keeps us growing and moving ahead. But you want to strike a balance,
realizing you’ve already achieved a tremendous amount.
Gregory:
It’s interesting you mention language because I often have students who say,
“I really don’t want …I don’t want …I don’t want ….”
Like you’ve said, we have to clearly identify what we don’t want, but that
doesn’t mean we have to give it energy. We just have to call it out.
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So one of the things I help them do is say, “I am grateful I have this, this,
and this, but I would rather ….” It helps them get out of the “I don’t want” or the “I
need” mode. They might say, “I’m grateful for the car I have, but I would rather be
driving a Porsche, especially for that trip.”
Joe:
I’d refine that just a bit. Instead of the word but, substitute the word and.
For example, “I like the car I’m driving now and I would really love to have
this thing,” whatever it is for that person. The word but sometimes clips people in
their thought process by dismissing the thought that went before it. It’s not wrong,
it’s just better to be able to say, like in my case, “I love the property I’m at, and I
would really love to have the two acres that are beside me.”
Gregory:
That makes sense.
The word but is dismissive. It’s like saying, “I really like you, but ….” It
makes you wonder what’s coming next.
Joe:
Right, and that’s the thing to be aware of. We have to be careful about how
we’re speaking because it’s reflecting our energy field and what we’re giving out.
At the same time, I want to assure everybody of one thing: I don’t care who
you are, where you are, what your bank account is, what your education is, or what
your experience is, success at the level you want is entirely possible and doable.
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I read a book called Cheating the Impossible, by Philippe Petit. The author
actually performed a tightrope wire act between the twin towers when they were
still standing in New York City, walking across a thin wire eight times. He did it
illegally and on his own, simply because he regarded it as impossible. My palms
were sweating when I read it because I imagined being that high in the air.
There are so many stories of people who have come to this country with
nothing, less than two dollars in their pocket and no connections. Some couldn’t
even speak the English, yet they went on to create what the rest of us call
enormous success.
That’s why I say that the success you want is entirely possible, doable, and
achievable, for everybody, and I don’t care who you are. This is the whole point of
Miracles Coaching™ – we’re going for miracles here. So you want to believe in
yourself, know what’s possible, and absolutely keep going forward.
Gregory:
That’s a beautiful piece of advice.
Another question we’ve received is “How can I improve my relationship
with my wife? I’m doing everything I can think of but I can’t seem to open her
heart. At this point she hates me. I do Ho’oponopono all the time, so please don’t
say that.”
Joe:
When I hear questions like this, I’m always listening for a deeper level than
the actual words being expressed.
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This person is, essentially, saying that his wife doesn’t have enough of an
open heart, that her heart is closed. Really, though, it sounds like he has the closed
heart, because he’s judging his wife and not accepting her as she is. Can you see
this?
Let me illustrate it in another way, using the property next to mine as an
example. Before I bought it, the owners were going to build. I got aggravated about
it and grumbled to Nerissa, “My serenity is going to be gone. I won’t be able to sit
out on my porch and see the trees, have a cigar, and just relax. I’m going to be
listening to construction for six months to a year, and then have neighbors beyond
that.”
My imagination started running away with me. I told her, “You know, if I
was enlightened I’d put a stop to them. I’d find a way to turn off all the power tools
and use superpowers to stop the construction.” Then I paused and thought, “Wait a
minute. If I were enlightened, it wouldn’t bother me at all.” Do you see the
difference?
When you come from a base human level, your ego is involved and you
want to change everybody else around you. We’re all human so there’s nothing
wrong with that – it’s part of our learning experience, part of our awakening. But
when you think it shouldn’t be some way, now you’re arguing with reality, and
that’s not where the miracles are. Miracles happen when you accept the people
around you.
Finally I got to that point, and said, “Well, I’m a spiritual teacher, I teach
self-help. I know all this stuff, I write all this stuff, so why am I allowing my
neighbors building on that property to bother me?” Once I made peace with it, I
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decided that, “If they actually build, I’m cool with that. That’s the next step and
what needs to happen.”
When I became okay with it, that’s when I got the insight on how to create a
win-win-win. I ended up with the property, and they built on another piece of
property that was bigger and better. But I couldn’t see that opportunity when I was
tied up in the thought, “I’ve got to change those people.”
So this man doesn’t need to change his wife – he actually has more work to
do on himself. When he can look at his own heart and say, “I love her just the way
she is,” she will feel that. Right now she’s probably feeling the judgment
energetically, and that doesn’t feel good to anybody.
If you are out in the world, say at lunch or dinner with someone, or a
meeting, and you sense someone is judging you, doesn’t like you, or wants you to
change you in some way –you can feel it. And you won’t like it. This woman is
feeling that.
Gregory:
Isn’t it generally the case that what we see in other people is a reflection of
what is going on in ourselves?
Joe:
Yes, it isn’t about the woman opening her heart.
Virtually 100% of the time, what you say about the other person you should
be saying about yourself because that person is a reflection, a mirror. What you see
in the other person, you can see in yourself – if you’ll look.
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Gregory:
So if you see something you don’t like in someone and think, “I really wish
they’d change that,” you should rephrase that and say, “I really wish I would
change that,” and change it in yourself first.
Joe:
Yes, that’s the nature of relationships – the great mirror fun house.
Everywhere you look you see yourself, but you don’t know it. You took this
ticket to ride in the fun house, to experience a room of mirrors. In every mirror you
look it’s you, but you don’t know it because you think it’s the other people. And
while it’s not about anyone else, it’s tempting to think that way, and the vast
majority of people do.
This kind of understanding can trigger an awakening, if you accept it in a
loving way. This is what Miracles Coaching™ is about, elevating your
consciousness so you can have an awakening. You have miracles happen by doing
the work on yourself, not doing the work on other people.
Gregory:
Is it possible to want money too much? I had a student say, “I think I might
be too attached to it.” How would they overcome that?
Joe:
When I hear this, it sounds like that person has the whisper of a possible fear
– not even a real fear – because they say, “I think I may be too attracted to it.”
They don’t say, “I know,” or “I’m positive…I’m certain…I’m obsessed.” This tells
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me that they’re just questioning it, and there’s nothing wrong with questioning
your beliefs or motives. This person sounds like they’re actually doing the right
thing – going after money because they want money.
If you were obsessed with it and doing nothing than that 100% of the time,
focusing on money while forgetting everything else – like your relationships,
health, walking the dog, feeding your family – then I would probably say “Yes, I
think you are out of balance.”
All we really want to do with money is appreciate it. Money goes where it’s
appreciated. I often use the quote, “The sole purpose of money is to express
appreciation.” As long as we come from a place of “Money is cool, money is a
nice tool, money is useful, money helps me get the end result of some things I
want, money is a nice scorecard that tells me I am doing well in business,” there’s
a neutrality there. You’re not focused on it too much at all, and it’s okay to have it.
So I would invite anybody thinking about money to simply appreciate
money. I’m doing all these different things, not because they make money – travel,
music, and books – I’m doing it because my passion is doing it. I’m doing it
because my life calling, my mission, my marching orders from God, if you will,
tell me to do it.
As I’m doing it, I know I’m living in the real world, and so my eye is on,
“Does it make money? What is making money?” That’s not an obsession with
money – it’s about knowing that if the money comes in, I get to keep pursuing my
passion. Walt Disney once said, “I want to make money from my movies so I can
continue making movies.” That’s a pure and innocent motive.
I encourage people to let money be a nice tool, not your master, and be at
peace with it.
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Gregory:
You often talk about Nevillizing as a process for manifesting, but how do
you balance Nevillizing with not being attached to an outcome?
Joe:
Hopefully your passion is the outcome because in the Nevillizing process –
the way Neville describes it – you go past the end result.
For example, if you want a raise at your job by Friday, most people would
sit and visualize receiving a raise by Friday.
Visualization is powerful, but Neville would go to the point where it’s
already happened. It’s over. It’s Saturday morning, you’re having breakfast with
friends, and tell them, “You know what happened yesterday? I got a raise at work
and it happened in the most spectacular, unexpected way. I didn’t even see it
coming. Sure, I wanted it to happen. I announced that I wanted it, and here it is. It
just showed up.”
So it’s more or less joyfully imagining it as having happened, but not
focusing on the end result with any sort of desperation.
Sometimes people are concerned with questions like, “How do I focus on the
end result and not worry about it? How do I Nevillize because, instead of it being
fun, I’m worrying. How do I stop the worry and concern?” This goes back to
having trust, faith, and gratitude, and living in this moment. Another idea, which I
write about in The Attractor Factor, is to go ahead and state whatever your
intention is, but end it with the phrase “this or something better.”
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Most people focus on an end result and lock in on it. They must have the
raise by 5:00 on Friday and it must be $100 more a week. They must have a certain
car, they must have it at a certain time, and it must be a certain make and model.
This is when worry and desperation settle in, because you’ve locked out all
other possibilities. I’ve found that the way to attract miracles is to focus on what
you want, but allow something better to come to you. I like something a friend of
mine shared with me. He’ll say, “Wouldn’t it be cool if...?” and you just fill in the
blank. That’s the attitude you want to have.
For example, in my case, I said, “Wouldn’t it be cool if I got the property
next door in some kind of way that was a win for me, a win for the people who
own the property currently, and a win for the realtor?”
If you wanted a raise, you could say, “Wouldn’t it be cool if I got the raise
on Friday?” Want a car? Say, “Wouldn’t it be cool if I got the car that I’m
imagining next month?”
That language, that phraseology, frees you to be playful.
Gregory:
Nevillizing comes down to what life looks like as a result of getting what
you want. That way, you don’t have to think about the outcome because you’re
thinking about what life looks like as a result.
Joe:
So again, take the energy off desperation, worry, or fear, and come from
trust, faith, love, and passion. Those more positive words are going to carry you in
the direction of a blissful journey of miracles.
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Gregory:
In The Attractor Factor, you mention yagnas. Can you talk about that?
Joe:
A yagna is a ritual done in India to clear negativity and beliefs within you.
I’ve been doing them for at least 10 years. I have people in India that
perform the rituals, chanting in Sanskrit for me. They have my intentions written
down and in their mind as they do this on my behalf.
The service I use can be found at www.Yagnas.by-choice.org. There are others,
but I can’t tell you the differences, or what’s better or worse. I continue to use
them because it’s helped me, and is helping me.
Gregory:
Is that like asking somebody to do Ho’oponopono on your behalf?
Joe:
Yes, it is.
While I think we should be doing everything on our own, I’m also enough of
an open-minded scout and experimenter that I want to try everything avaiable. If
there are services that say they can help do something for me, I’m going to try
them.
Gregory:
I’m a “just in case” kind of guy myself.
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Joe:
You could say I’m stacking the deck in my favor.
I’m also a scout. When I do these things for myself and find what’s working,
I turn around and tell everybody else. I put it in my books, on my blog, and I tell
the people at Miracles Coaching™, much like I’m doing right now.
Gregory:
That’s the story of your book, Zero Limits.
You heard about Dr. Hew Len, found him, and wrote about it, which
became, in my opinion, one of the best self-help books of all time.
Joe:
I’m hoping it will be a movie, and in fact, let’s position it this way:
Wouldn’t it be cool if Zero Limits was transformed into an award-winning, lifechanging movie that had as much power, if not more, than “The Secret” did when
it came out five or six years ago?
Gregory:
That would be cool if it happens.
Joe:
I’d say, “That will be cool when it happens.”
Gregory:
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Right, when it happens…
Why don’t you tell us about the Law of Creation, exactly what it is?
Joe:
I can tell you that the big secret about it is action – and I cover this
thoroughly in my audio program, The Abundance Paradigm.
Action is how you move from the Law of Attraction into the Law of
Creation. I make this distinction because a lot of people know about the Law of
Attraction. They’ve watched the movie, “The Secret,” read it in one of my books,
or heard it from other teachers. That’s one law, but not the only one.
Without all the other laws, without taking action, for example, their results
are fairly impotent. You can still get results with the Law of Attraction, but I want
people to get miracles. That’s why this is called Miracles Coaching™.
I always tell people, “Expect miracles.” Why? Because I think that’s what
we can experience. I don’t think anything is impossible in the world at all. I think
all limits are self-imposed. I don’t know any physical or psychological barriers
actually out there. We keep discovering new planets, new systems, new science,
and it just keeps going on and on.
I’m coming from the space that miracles are entirely possible for us as long
as we go for them, and going for them means taking action. That’s when we start
to create.
The real secret, the inner nugget inside the Law of Creation – is taking
action, and for me that means following your passion, following your inspiration.
Those are very high energy tools that come through you. This is not just you
egotistically doing things – it’s what the mind is trying to do through you.
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When you follow your passion and inspiration, you start to co-create with
God, if you will – with the Divine, or the Universe, and that’s where creation is
taking place. You create through co-creation, using the Law of Attraction and the
Law of Right Action. It’s all about action, creating what you want.
Gregory:
Have you ever had an experience where, as you start to give basic shape to a
project, say a book, the project takes on an intelligence of its own, saying, “This is
the direction I want you to take me,” and you feel it writing itself?
Joe:
Yes, yes, yes, yes, and YES! And I love that experience and can give you
two examples.
The book, Zero Limits, wrote itself. I completed it in two weeks, which is
profoundly unusual. People usually take years to write books. In contrast, I gave
six months of research and six months of writing to my book on P.T. Barnum, an
entire year.
With Zero Limits, I remember sitting down in December a few years ago,
and as I started to move my hand, it became like taking dictation. It led me through
that book and it became alive. And here’s the truth: I have written 50-something
books, but when I read Zero Limits, it’s like somebody else wrote it, yet it was
clearly me. I love that book, I love that process, and I love Dr. Hew Len, so when I
had the opportunity, I sat down and joyfully began it – but the book led me.
I have another example of something mystical and miraculous occurring,
which has to do with a song on my new music CD, “Ghost Train.” I have a guitar
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made by Huss and Dalton, and one day I was strumming and fooling around with
no real direction, when suddenly my hand started to do an unusual strumming
pattern that I’d never done before. I’ve heard so much music in my life that I can’t
say I hadn’t heard it before, but it was an unusual strum pattern.
The next thing I knew moaning began coming out of me. I’d strum this
unusual pattern a little, followed by this moaning sound. Then it turned into lyrics,
as I started visualizing a couple waiting for a train. I didn’t know what was
happening. I, Joe Vitale, holding the guitar, was being a puppet – and my strings
were being pulled.
That song, “Ghost Train,” is now on the CD as the first track. You can hear a
sample of it if you go to www.thehealingsong.com. I swear that song is haunting.
There’s a message in it about stopping war, and I don’t go around talking about
war, I don’t put my focus on that.
Something – either my unconscious mind or Divinity – came through and
lead that song through me. I am as in awe as anybody. I’m proud because the song
came through me. Yet if that song or CD wins some sort of Grammy, I’ll be
embarrassed, because a part of me will go, “You know, I just received it, I didn’t
really write it.”
So to answer your question, I’ve had that experience and I don’t believe it’s
unique to me. Ideas and inspiration come to all of us, but most people block it.
They say things like, “I don’t have the time, I don’t have the experience, I don’t
have the money, I don’t have the education, I don’t know where this is going, I am
embarrassed by this,” or, “I’m not a singer, I’m not a writer, I’m not an author, I’m
not a musician.” We dismiss it and that’s where we block the flow of creation and
the flow of miracles.
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I invite people to realize that inspiration knocks at your door all the time, so
the next time it knocks, listen, take notes, and, as soon as you can, take action.
That’s how you create.
Gregory:
Yes, the universe demands immediacy.
Can you tell us about the picture on the cover of your CD? Is that your
studio with your library and guitar in the picture?
Joe:
Yes, it was taken in what’s called my “man cave” to some people, my studio
and home office to other people, or corporate headquarters to others, depending on
who’s asking.
In the picture, I’m holding my healing guitar, which was made especially for
me. It’s one of a kind. The fret board has the phrases, “I love you, I’m sorry, please
forgive me, and thank you” on them, so I dubbed it “the healing guitar.” I play it
for a lot of the tracks I do, including my instrumental CD, Aligning to Zero, which
I did with my guitar teacher, Matthew Dixon. I used it for all but one song, #6, on
that particular CD.
Gregory:
That’s an awesome album.
Joe:
Yes, it’s very popular and people love it.
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If anyone wants to check it out, it’s available at www.aligningtozero.info.
Gregory:
Once you find a great technique that works for you, such as Ho’oponopono,
EFT, or something else, is there any benefit to continuing to search?
In other words, why do people keep searching when they have found the
one? Is it boredom, ego, are they just looking for something in addition? Is there a
way to maintain trust in the thing that’s working for them?
Joe:
The simple answer is that life continues to grow and we continue to learn.
We’re always discovering something new. We’ve not come to a full stop and
I don’t know that we ever will. I’m not even sure that when we die it’s a full stop
with nothing else to happen.
For example, I discovered Ho’oponopono, and promote and tell the world
about it. Have I stopped? No, absolutely not. I’m still looking for other techniques.
In fact, I found another healer I’ve worked with a couple of times and I’m going to
bring him to Austin so I can work with him in person. He appears to help people
burn off their karma, although I don’t know how to describe his technique because
I’ve never seen it in person.
If this is true and it works, I’m going to bring a small group of people
together, close friends of mine, to experience it with me. Then, if we all agree that
this is something phenomenal, I’ll put it in my bag of tricks – my toolkit, so to
speak.
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So should I stop because I’ve discovered Ho’oponopono? No. Should I
continue using Ho’oponopono? Yes. Will I discover something that is as good, or
maybe even better? Well, that’s why the quest is there. Yes, it’s very possible
because the fat lady hasn’t sung, as they say in opera, and the show is not over. We
continue to learn, explore, and discover – and I absolutely love the quest. I love
seeking new ways to create miracles and new ways to help people, so it behooves
me to keep learning.
When I find a new healing technique or method that can actually make
profound changes quickly, I pass it on to everybody in Miracles Coaching™
because I don’t want people to take the slow route. I’m always looking for the fast
track. Curiosity is probably leading the way, but I can’t help but suspect that the
Divine itself, God if you will, is leading us, through us, to find all these different
ways. Life’s a glorious adventure! We’re not done.
Gregory:
My experience, especially as a coach, has been that we learn things as we
can handle them. We’ll learn something that we can accept, use it, and then, as we
develop faith and trust, we’re ready to take another step.
Joe:
Yes, you get them as you’re ready for them.
If I had learned about Ho’oponopono 20 or 30 years ago, I wouldn’t have
been ready to hear it. I would have ridiculed and dismissed it. In fact, the original
EST training, which was wildly popular back in the 70s and 80s, came out when I
was in college. It was all over the news, celebrities were using it, and it was the
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first big self-help seminar. As such, it was very controversial. I could have been
open to it, but I was not. I was not ready.
Today, some of my friends are the founders and promoters of EST, who’ve
gone on to do spinoffs from it, and now, of course, I’m fascinated by it. In many
ways I miss that I could have done it when it was new and out there, but I wasn’t
ready. That’s the bottom line.
Gregory:
Can you expound on level 5 of the Awakening? Have you had any new
insights or experience?
Joe:
That’s a wonderful question. I talk about different levels of awakening in
both “The Abundance Paradigm” and “The Awakening Course” programs, and
also in The Awakening Course book itself.
Most people out in the world act like victims. It’s not really a stage of
awakening, but it’s a stage. If we’re lucky, we go into empowerment, which is the
second stage. Movies like “The Secret” and books like mine help people to get into
that second stage. The third stage is surrender, and that’s when you discover
something like Ho’oponopono.
You have to be ready for all these different stages because if you learn about
Ho’oponopono when you’re in the first stage feeling like a victim, you aren’t going
to hear it. You’re going to make fun of it, ignore it, and be repulsed by it, maybe
even angered by it.
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Often in life we come up against something that we can’t explain.
Sometimes it’s an illness, accident, or death, and we realize we aren’t as
empowered as we thought. We seem to have limits, and that’s when we start to
surrender to a higher power, to God, to the Divine. That’s the third stage.
The fourth stage I call the awakening, or enlightenment, and while I don’t
know any way to make that happen, I know you can prepare for it. You can do it a
number of ways: being in Miracles Coaching™, doing work on your beliefs to find
limiting beliefs and releasing them, and meditating.
Meditation and gratitude, or any of the tools, help quiet you, allowing you to
be more sensitive and in tune with God or the Divine. And, as we talked about
earlier, it can also help you feel more at one with nature. All these prepare you to
actually have the experience of the fourth stage – awakening or enlightenment.
Some people go on into the fifth stage where you become the walking
enlightened, which I’m still learning about. I’m not in that stage, although I have
had glimpses of it during a satori – an experience where your awareness pops for a
moment and you see the totality of all of life. You experience that awakening
moment of enlightenment.
I have no way to trigger that with the knowledge and experience I have right
now, or know how to make it a permanent awareness. All I know is how to prepare
for it.
Gregory:
How do you approach overcoming guilt and forgiveness of self for past
errors and mistakes?
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Joe:
I think Wayne Dyer said that if there’s any lack of joy, wealth, and
prosperity in your life, it’s because of a lack of self-forgiveness.
Forgiving yourself for anything that has already been done in the past and
releasing the guilt will unleash all the positive energy that’s within you. It allows
you to create, attract, and manifest the miracles you’re longing for. It’s that
important.
In many ways, and in many cultures, they believe that forgiving yourself is
the only thing you really have to do because, once you’ve done this, you open
yourself to the miracles.
The real punch line is no one’s punishing you. There is no Divine being
saying, “You’re under my thumb because you’ve done something in the past so
I’m punishing you.” Nobody is doing that to you but you, so you have to ask
yourself, “Okay, can I stop punishing myself now?” When you say yes and feel the
pressure taken off your chest, or the monkey off your back, you are free. But you
have to do it, it’s an inside job.
Talking to your Miracles Coach, reflecting on forgiveness, love, and
appreciation of yourself, these are all tools to help you forgive yourself. There’s no
reason not to love, appreciate, reward, release, and completely set yourself free
from guilt and punishment – it’s all psychological. It’s over, the past is over. It’s
done. You can’t change it, but you can release it.
You can reframe it in many ways and have an experience that you changed
it. The point is to be able to say, “It’s over, I did what I did when I did it because
that was the level of consciousness I had. I wasn’t at a higher level of
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consciousness, or an expanded level of consciousness. I am now loving,
appreciating, and freeing myself.”
You deserve to be free because you deserve miracles. Let go of the guilt, let
go of the past, forgive yourself, and move forward.
Gregory:
Thank you, Joe. It’s always such a pleasure to visit with you.
Joe:
Thank you, Gregory, for doing this. God speed to everyone. Expect
miracles.
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Secret Session #12
Joe Vitale with Janeen Detrick
Janeen:
It’s a privilege to have you here, Joe.
Joe:
Thank you, Janeen.
I know you feel gratitude all the time, and I’d love to have you do a short
gratitude meditation so that we’re all cleaned, clear, centered, happy, loving,
loveable – and present in this moment.
Janeen:
I’m delighted to do that for everyone.
Begin this Gratitude Moment Anchoring meditation by closing your eyes
right now wherever you are sitting. Take a deep breath in through your nose, and
on the exhale say, “Thank you, thank you, thank you.”
Inhale again, and allow your shoulders to sink down into your chair a little
deeper, allowing the energy to flow into your heart. Feel the gratitude of the
words, “Thank you, thank you, thank you,” as you think them.
Choose something in your immediate surroundings and offer gratitude for it,
exhausting it with every ounce of gratitude you can find for that particular object.
The object is what anchors you to this moment and helps you be here now.
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The object I choose right now is a wool throw I’m sitting on. I sit on a wool
throw because it grounds me and brings me into balance. That’s healthy for me
and good for balancing my energies. As I go through this meditation, I am offering
gratitude and appreciation for this wool throw on my office chair.
Thank you, wool blanket, for being in my life. Thank you for letting me rub
you between my fingers and feel your soft fibers. It feels good to my touch and is
grounding for me. I appreciate you, little blanket.
Thank you to the person who added their energy to this blanket that grounds
me so lovingly every day, as it allows me to sit upon it in my office chair. Thank
you weaver, whoever you are and wherever you are in this world. Maybe you are
in India, maybe you are in Pakistan. I don’t know where you are, but wherever you
are, thank you for lovingly weaving this wool throw so that I could have it here
with me now.
Thank you for the attention to detail that you lovingly wove through this
throw, the beautiful black, red, green and orange threads, and that gorgeous
indigo. Thank you that you chose the colors of the chakra system so that I can feel
the energies flowing through my chakra system, throughout my entire body, every
time I touch this little blanket.
Thank you to the sheep. Oh, how I appreciate your part in the cycle of life
and the energy that you have added to the cycle of life, wonderful little sheep
friend, wherever you are, wherever you graze. Thank you for adding your energy
and growing this beautiful wool for me, so that I could enjoy it today. I feel
anchored, grounded, and connected to the earth. I appreciate you, wonderful
sheep.
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Thank you to the farmer who lovingly cares for you. May you be blessed and
feel this appreciation being sent to you right now, wherever you are, however long
ago you were part of feeding the sheep that made this wool fiber for my little
blanket. I hope that you are feeling the gratitude, and that energy is flowing
through you in a new and abundant way, just like I feel it, as I think about you and
this little wool blanket.
Thank you wool blanket for reminding me how we are all connected.
Thank you, thank you, thank you. It is done.
Joe:
That was beautiful, thank you for doing that.
Janeen:
I’m honored to do it.
Let’s begin with something that happened recently – the 11th anniversary of
the September 11th trauma. How can we understand disasters? Did all of those
people attract that stuff?
I’ve even had students ask me, “Did God do it to them?”
Joe:
That’s a big question, and I tend to view it from a higher perception of
circumstances.
When we see accidents and disasters so big they’re hard to comprehend,
with multitudes of people injured or lost, and we look at it face to face, it’s
overwhelming. It doesn’t make sense. It hurts. We feel the pain and confusion.
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On the human level of looking at it, I can relate to how confusing it is. I can
remember that moment of 9/11, as I’m sure everyone else does, too. But when you
look from a higher perspective, you start to wonder, “Hey, what could be going
on?”
The way I look at things, we all have unconscious programs going on. In
Zero Limits, Dr. Hew Len and I talk about how our unconscious mind is full of
beliefs and programming we’re not aware of – what he calls data. Some experts
suggest we’re aware of less than 10% of what’s actually going on, which means
that the vast majority of our actions, behaviors, and what we see in the world is all
bubbling up from a very murky unconscious.
This is our unconscious, our collective unconscious, if you will. It’s our
personal unconscious and all of its programs acting out, and, in this sense, those
people – and all the rest of us – attracted these events.
We can’t blame ourselves and we can’t blame them. It has nothing to do
with blame or feeling guilty, but it is about awakening. That’s the whole point of
my work these days, and Miracles Coaching™ is for us to awaken to what has
been unconsciously driving us.
The reason that we don’t get everything we want is that, in our unconscious
mind, we have beliefs, or data, which says we don’t really want it. We’re keeping
it away from ourselves in order to keep us safe for some reason that makes sense in
the unconscious mind.
It’s the same way on the outside with all of these events. There may be a
higher level other than that reason going on. I don’t have a direct connection to
know what that is, but in order for me to make sense of events like this, I can look
at it and say, “This is an example that we’re not clear.”
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We have darkness within ourselves. Collectively, we attract other people
with the same kind of darkness, and we can collectively attract an event out of that
darkness. This is why it’s so important to work on ourselves, clean and clear all the
programming, negativity, and limiting beliefs, data we’re not aware of.
There are many ways to do this and Miracles Coaching™ is one of them.
The fundamental essence of this coaching is to take care of those inner beliefs.
In Zero Limits, I wrote about Ho’oponopono, and everyday I am reminded
of how powerful and simple it is, using just these four phrases, referred to as
“cleaning”:
I love you
I’m sorry
Please forgive me
Thank you
If we really want to make a difference in our lives, as well as the lives of
others, we’ve got to work on ourselves inside. The more we do, the more we clean
and clear, then the more we can reduce those things that take place in the world,
those things we read about in the newspaper and feel squeamish about.
So, yes, in human terms these are disasters, but I see them also as a wake-up
call. The waking up has to come from you and me, and I view it as a very personal
thing. We have to look within to find what in us might be contributing to these
outer events because, on another level, they’re not really” outer.” They’re
projections of what’s going on in us.
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We’re the ones attracting these things and we’re the ones to do something
about it. I know this is a huge thing to comprehend, so meditate on it, ask for
guidance, pray over it, and talk to your coach about it.
Do whatever it takes to understand it. Clearly, being upset about these events
won’t help you, but being awakened because of them will – and I think that’s the
real point.
Janeen:
If we eliminate our own darkness – inside – by doing the cleaning and the
clearing, we reduce the projections of the collective consciousness that creates
disasters of this kind.
Joe:
That’s exactly right, and you said it more simply and directly than me.
Everything we see on the outside is a mirror reflection of what’s inside of us,
which is hard to accept. It’s easier to say, “That wasn’t me, that was a terrorist, or
that was the bad guy or bad woman” or whoever you want to blame it on.
However, if you own that you might unconsciously – and, again, I stress
unconsciously because nobody is consciously doing this – have beliefs and data as
an operating system in your brain or in your mind, then you start to realize that you
can do something about it. That’s when you start doing the cleaning, clearing, and
coaching to lighten what’s in you, to brighten what you are seeing on the outside.
Janeen:
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I love the realization that we have all created it together. It eliminates the
blame and victimhood.
Joe:
It really does.
I saw the ending of a movie with Robert Redford recently where someone
was mauled by a bear. People captured it and put the bear in a cage. Some wanted
to kill it, but the person who was mauled recovered, and during his healing, he did
a lot of meditating. He told his friend, “I want you to release the bear. I want you to
let him go. The bear was simply being a bear. He didn’t do anything evil or
wrong.”
In fact, the bear had misjudged this fellow. He thought the man was going to
take his food, so the bear naturally did what he was inclined to do – he protected
himself and hit the person. It was all about forgiveness, letting go of the perception
of the bear. In effect, the person said, “No, the bear is not bad.” They ended up
letting the bear go, freeing him out of total love and peace.
I think that’s what these outside events are – reminders to look inside
ourselves and find inner peace, even when it looks like, “Here’s a great opportunity
to be unhappy.”
Janeen:
That helps us create collective peace.
You’ve said before that everything is energy, and sometimes people have a
hard time getting their head around that principle. Can you explain why things look
solid?
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Have you written a book on this topic – or know a resource for learning
more?
Joe:
I haven’t written a book about it because that’s more in the realm of science,
whether it’s quantum physics or just plain physics. There are plenty of books on
the subject, though, including one called Quantum Physics for Dummies, so we can
start at whatever level we want.
What’s exciting is that, somehow, our brain is a part of all this. There are
new sciences that study how the brain works, and their studies have shown that our
eyes don’t see everything around us – and the brain will actually fill in missing
information. You might say it plays tricks on us by filling in the gaps in the
universe. In other words, there’s a lot more going on in the universe than we
actually perceive.
For example, when I’m looking at my giant roll-top desk and touching it, it
feels pretty darn hard to me. If I hit it with my head or leg, it’s going to hurt. But
it’s my understanding that this looks hard because the molecular structure is
moving so slowly. If it actually sped up it would almost disappear.
Everything is made up of energy – your whole body, the car you drive – all
moving at various speeds, and depending on the speed, it’s going to appear hard.
Even emotion is energy.
Janeen:
The fact that our emotions are energy probably has something to do with
why we’re so often challenged in relationships and attracting love.
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One of my students asked for ideas because his wife left him a few years ago
and he wants to be in love again. He said his friends encourage him to join dating
sites, but he doesn’t want to. He thinks that’s an artificial way to meet.
What if someone has been Nevillizing about attracting the love of their life,
but it hasn’t shown up yet?
Joe:
Several things come to mind.
First, you have to be at peace with the person who has left you, in this case,
his wife, because as long as you feel a grudge or resentment, or even a fear that it
could happen again, you’re going to push love away. I have a sneaking suspicion
that’s what’s happening here because his friends are telling him to join a dating site
and he’s dismissing it. It could be they’re getting a signal from the universe that,
“Here’s a way to go find your special person.”
There’s nothing wrong with dating sites. I found Nerissa on a dating site, the
person I have been with for the last 13 years, and I know many people who have
found their partners on dating sites. I even know people who run dating sites and
their success record has been astonishing. There’s nothing artificial about it,
although you can make it artificial by lying and doing all kinds of crazy things to
not have it work the way you want it to work.
It sounds like a belief issue – saying that dating sites are artificial is a belief.
It is not a fact because we can’t all say it’s artificial and we can’t all prove it. That
makes it somebody’s opinion, or belief.
Why would a person believe that? Well, it would keep them from finding the
love of their life. Why would they not want to find the love of their life? Because
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they’ve been wounded and don’t want to be hurt again. This is how our mental
processes work, and why it’s important to be in Miracles Coaching™ where you
have somebody to hear you. They can feed back to you what you may not realize
you’re saying – let alone believing.
In this case, I would tell that person, “Look, there’s nothing wrong with
dating sites, but before you join one make peace with your ex-wife or the person
that left you. Make sure that you can love that person even though they left you.
Make sure you can love yourself even though somebody left you. Make sure that
you’re in love with yourself and life right now because as soon as you start to fall
in love with yourself right now, other people will sense it.”
If you do this, you’ll be sending out a beacon of energy, and your perfect
love has got to pick up on it. They may or may not come through a dating site.
They might just show up giving out brochures at your house one day.
The point is, and this is the essence to almost every question I ever hear, is
that it’s not about whether it’s right or wrong to do a particular action. What’s
important is that you’re clear with the past and clear about what you want in the
future, and you’re at peace in this moment.
When you clear the past and are at peace with this moment, and you know
where you would love to go in the future, you’re now in alignment for things to
work out.
So in a case like this, I would strongly recommend this person look at the
past, that old story of the person who left them, make peace with it, and fall in love
right now.
Janeen:
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That’s beautiful. I can’t wait to see you write a book on relationships.
Joe:
I’m actually working on an audio program with someone who’s very famous
in the relationship arena, and we’ll be releasing it soon.
Janeen:
There’ll be great demand for that.
What about gay relationships? One of my students said he’s been in one for
20 years and still feels badly around his parents. Apparently, even though they’re
nice about it, his parents still think they shouldn’t be married, only friends.
He said, “It’s now affecting my health. My first and second chakras often
cause me problems. I don’t know how to gain a new perspective and forgive the
world for being so small minded. I’ve been doing Ho’oponopono for three years,
but I need something else, like a paradigm shift.”
Joe:
I admire this person for asking this – 20 years is a long time to be in any sort
of relationship, and that’s wonderful.
In Ho’oponopono, Dr. Hew Len says it is working even when you haven’t
yet seen the result that you’re demanding from the universe. Even though you’re
cleaning and it’s being erased, there can be so much belief and unconscious
programming, or what he calls data, that it can take longer than a three year period.
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It’s like trying to clean Donald Trump’s mansion. You’re not done in a few
hours. There’s so much cleaning to do it’s going to take longer. You don’t just do
it in the evening and then, by the time you go to bed, everything is resolved.
This is not that kind of methodology – it’s not superficial. We’re going
deeper than that. We’re looking for the miracle, a deep transformation, and that
might take longer.
When you do Ho’oponopono, things are cleaning and clearing. Just trust the
process. It’s so easy that no one should think anything about continuing to do it
anyway. Our part is simply, “I love you, I’m sorry, please forgive me, thank you.”
It’s about your connection to the Divine as you’re considering whatever it is you’re
feeling.
Another thing to notice is this person’s reference to “the world of small
minded people,” but there aren’t any small minded people out there. The world
isn’t small minded, the person thinking it is small minded.
The dilemma isn’t, “How I can change my entire family?” but rather, “How
do I just change myself?” It’s not about looking at the world and saying, “I would
be so much happier and loving, and life would be so much breezier, if my family
changed.” That’s not how this works.
All you have to do is look in the mirror and fall in love with yourself – no
matter what the rest of the world says. You fall in love with yourself and say, “I’ve
been in a 20-year relationship and that’s a marriage in any culture. It’s not just a
friendship – it’s way beyond that.”
You don’t have to convince anybody else. No one is holding court. You
don’t need a judge and an attorney to represent you. It’s something you tell
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yourself, “I am in a long-term relationship that’s both friendship and marriage.”
You don’t have to tell anybody else that – you’re the only one that has to know it.
It’s your own belief system that’s creating the filter so that, when you look
out, it looks like you’re seeing small-minded-beliefs people with these systems. In
reality it’s your own belief in your own head. It’s your own small minded
perception.
Janeen:
It sounds like this person is attracting judgment from his parents – and
what’s he doing when he says that the world is small minded? Judging.
When you judge somebody else, that’s what you get back.
Joe:
When somebody says the world is judging them, what they’re actually doing
is judging the world. The problem is they don’t usually hear it unless someone like
a Miracles Coach points it out and says, “The only way you can be judged by
people is if you’re doing it.” That’s the wake-up call, and where the real work is –
within.
Celebrate 20 years, celebrate your marriage, celebrate your friends, celebrate
your love, and celebrate a family that has been there for you all this time.
Janeen:
So it’s about looking at what there is to appreciate and have gratitude for,
instead of looking for what isn’t.
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Joe:
Gratitude answers everything.
If you sit in gratitude first and look for what you can appreciate in what
you’re tempted to complain about, you probably wouldn’t even have a question. It
will dissolve in love, coming from that source of gratitude which is there waiting
for us to discover it right now.
Janeen:
Can you comment on clearing “emotional junk?”
I had one student suggest that, while there seems to be all kinds of inspired
methods, the only reason any of them work is that the person is making a choice to
do something other than think a negative thought.
Joe:
That’s not how all systems work.
Even with Ho’oponopono, you’re not asked to change your thought. You’re
asked to say, “I love you, I’m sorry, please forgive me, thank you” to whatever the
thought or feeling is. It’s not an issue of changing a thought.
Changing thoughts is wonderful. I definitely prefer having positive thoughts
over negative thoughts. I like to do the “what if up” game and think things like,
“What if it all works out?” It beats the “what if down” game where you’re
constantly thinking, “What if it doesn’t work out?” I always prefer to have a
choice about a thought, but not all the clearing techniques focus on that.
For example, I talk about the emotional freedom technique (EFT) in the
movie, The Tapping Solution. When you do EFT, you take whatever comes up for
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you – a negative thought, a limiting belief, or a feeling in your body – and you tap
it away. You’re not consciously changing a thought. So while the person is partly
correct, because many methods do involve that, it’s not a sweeping or correct
analysis of all clearing and cleaning techniques.
The larger question is probably, “Why are they even asking? Why does it
even matter?” I say do whatever works for you because there are a bundle of
techniques – and more coming. Just say thank you. I know I can use all the magic I
can get. I want all of the different transformational tools, and, when I find one, I’m
still open to something else. I often use EFT – and Ho’oponopono non-stop.
We need anything that works at shifting the unconscious programming. Pick
one and do it.
Janeen:
Is there a good way to release guilt and embarrassment surrounding things
you’ve done in the past?
For example, one student said, “A part of me wants to fall in love, and a part
of me doesn’t, because I don’t want to have to disclose how many times I’ve been
married, or how many times I’ve filed bankruptcy, because of my stupid choices
and my desire for instant money. I believe the anxiousness about money has now
subsided so I don’t need money anymore in order to be happy, but this anxiety
about telling a prospective love is so embarrassing.”
Is there a way for them to stop feeling scared of rejection or being laughed
at?
Joe:
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I admire this person for stepping up and being so open about their past and
their heart and their question. It takes a lot of courage to do that.
My answer is, “Change your story.” I don’t mean change the facts or lie
about the facts, but rather, change your story about the facts. Right now that person
is saying, “I’m embarrassed that I’ve been married so many times, and I refuse to
fall in love because of it.” This isn’t positive, nurturing, or loving to you.
You need to take care of you. Get to the place where you can be in love, you
can love yourself, and you can welcome love in your heart and in your life again.
You deserve it. This is all true.
If the stumbling block is looking at your past and saying, “I was married 12
times,” and you feel embarrassed to say it, reframe it. Right now you’re saying it’s
bad. Your story is that you’re a failure because you tried 12 times, or 7 times, or
whatever it was, and it didn’t work. Just change it and have fun with it.
For example, you could say, “I was married 12 times and you know what
that means? I’m great at beginning relationships! What I’ve learned is that I’m
going to begin this relationship and the new me is going to complete the
relationship.” The point is for you to make up your own empowering story, the
story that owns your past in a positive way.
Here’s another example from something that happened years ago when I was
in a movie. The filmmaker had lost his left arm in a mountain climbing accident
and, at first, he didn’t talk about it. I felt really uncomfortable because I didn’t
know how to act, and I was also dealing with the adrenaline rush of being filmed.
One day he started to talk about his arm, saying he had lost it in a mountain
climbing accident and was embarrassed about it. Then he said, “But, I have my
right arm and you know what that means? I’m always right.” And he continued to
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make these jokes, turning what could have been a negative limitation,
uncomfortable and embarrassing, into something that we joined hearts over.
What a positive way to look at what happened. I’m sure he was unhappy and
wrestled with it. He probably had to go through a dark night of the soul and come
out the other side, but he did, and now he owns it. He’s saying, “Yes, I lost my
arm. I was clumsy and I fell. Okay, well, now I’m always right because I’ve got
my right arm.”
The story we tell ourselves about the past can limit us or empower us. Most
of us tell it in a negative way. We say, “I did such and such and wasn’t that dumb?
I’m a dumb person so I’m not going to take any chances anymore because I might
screw up again.” Instead, why not say, “I’ve made some mistakes before but I
learned from them. I was married a few times and now I know the ins and outs of
marriage, so I’m not getting married until I know for sure this one’s going to
work.”
Change your story, not the facts. You’re not lying, you’re not fibbing.
You’re changing your story and reframing it in a positive way – have fun with it.
As soon as you do, you’ll have people saying, “Yes, I want that person
because they’ve been around the block and knows what marriage is all about. If
I’m getting married, I’m going with that person. I don’t want to go with someone
who’s never been married because I don’t know what I’m getting into. This person
does.”
The same concept applies to someone who has filed bankruptcy more than
once because of stupid choices.
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Janeen:
The first thing that crosses my mind is to reframe it as, “There’s no such
thing as failure. Look what I learned every time.”
Joe:
Yes, I filed bankruptcy decades ago in Houston.
In the beginning I was embarrassed, until I realized it solved a lot of
problems. It was one of the smartest things I ever did because, once I told the bill
collectors I’d filed bankruptcy, they said, “Okay, thanks, have a great day,” and
quit bothering me. It was like magic.
I’m not encouraging bankruptcy. I’m saying that, whether it’s a marriage,
bankruptcy, accident, or something else, anything in your past can be reframed in a
positive light.
Janeen:
I tell people who have negative energy towards themselves and are freaking
out that bankruptcy is rooted in the Old Testament, in the Judeo-Christian ethic.
They called it the Year of Jubilee and it happened every seventh year.
So if you think of that Old Testament God as being God, then really, God’s
the one who instituted bankruptcy, that’s where it started. Every seventh year all
debts were forgiven and everyone had a clean slate – so the year of Jubilee, throw a
party!
This idea can teach us a whole new level of forgiveness, because the
principle being taught in the Old Testament is that, once you let go of thinking
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someone owes you something, energetically you posture the universe to be your
debtor, and the universe gives back from many sources.
Joe:
That’s right.
Janeen:
Speaking of letting go, how would someone set goals but also be detached
from them? In other words, if I’m supposed to hold them in my awareness so I can
Nevillize them, how do I simultaneously detach? It seems incongruent.
Joe:
It does seem that way, but the answer is how you perceive things – the same
answer I give when I’m asked, “How do I let go and take inspired action?”
Letting go is a psychological state. When you’re dependent, addicted, or
attached to particular results, you’re not letting go. Letting go means it’s okay if
you get the results and okay if you don’t. There’s a mental juggling act going on.
For example, say your goal is to write a report for a class by Friday, and
you’re taking action toward it. At the same time, you have to be okay that if
something surfaces and you get the report done on Thursday, before Friday, that’s
okay, and if you get the report done on Saturday, that’s okay. You have to be okay.
There’s a spirit of trust involved here, and you treat goals as sign posts down
the road. We look down the road and say things like, “I want to have this house, I
want to have this relationship, I want to create this music CD, I want to write this
book, I want to open this business, I want to increase sales.”
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All of these are sign posts down the road, things you’d like to achieve as
you’re driving through life – but don’t forget to smell the roses right now. Look to
the left, look to the right, see the wonderful structures here. As you move towards
these different goals, you might see a sign ahead that says “Better book ahead, turn
right,” or “Better business ahead, turn left.”
Be flexible, that’s the key word here. Be flexible in going for any goal by
ending it with the phrase, “This or something better.” It’s a loophole that allows
you to change your goal for something better as you move towards it. You may not
know what the better goal is until you start taking action – now – towards the goal
that you said you want. It’s all play, a game.
People often put too much stress on goals and achievement – the old type-A
heart attack way of “I’m going to do this no matter what.” They end up sacrificing
their health, family, friends, and marriage in the name of the almighty goal. That’s
not right – having a goal is an energy generator.
For example, I currently have four CDs on the market. At a recent music
session, my producer and I started talking about making another one. When we
first met, I didn’t have the goal for another CD, but, as we started talking, I
thought, “I do have more songs in me and really love this. I could do another CD in
a few months.”
Suddenly this energy bubbled up and I got excited because I threw a goal out
there. As I move toward that goal – by taking action – it may change. I may decide
it isn’t going to be an album, it’s going to be a three-act play, or a musical book, I
don’t know. The point is I’m not married to it in any negative way. I have fun with
it, while being open to changing it. That’s the letting go part.
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In the process of taking action, something better, more inspired, and refined
might come to me that could surprise or delight me – or feel like a miracle. So yes,
let go and take action, but don’t be attached or addicted to it. Your survival doesn’t
depend on that goal.
Have fun, be in this moment, enjoy what’s going on, go for your goals, and
open yourself to something better showing up.
Janeen:
That’s beautiful, especially the part about not being so fixated on the goal
that you forget to be flexible with it, or allow it to morph into something else if you
feel so inspired.
A lot of students think that if they allow it to turn into something different, it
means they’re quitting on their goal, but redirecting is not the same as quitting.
Joe:
If I’m going to Dallas because I want to go to a particular Indian restaurant
in town, and on the drive hear there’s a new one that just opened up in Waco, I’m
not quitting if I turn and go to the Waco restaurant. I’m still going, but something
better showed up. For example, Waco could be closer and easier to get to than my
original goal.
That’s why the phrase, “This or something better,” is so important. It’s not
quitting the goal – it’s paying attention to what might be better than the goal,
which is a new goal.
Janeen:
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That feels light and wonderful, and a great way to set goals.
Joe:
It’s a great way to go through life, and that takes us back to feeling gratitude
right now.
Feel gratitude and inspiration for what to do, and out of that place take
action. This will lead to more to be grateful for, more action to take, and new
discoveries along the way. That’s the process of miracles.
Janeen:
Joe, thank you so much for sharing all this.
Joe:
Thank you, Janeen. I love and appreciate you.
God speed everybody.
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About the Author
Dr. Joe Vitale is the author of way too many bestselling books to mention
here. Some of them include The Attractor Factor, Life's Missing Instruction
Manual, The Key, Zero Limits Attract Money Now and his most recent release to
date, Faith. Dr. Vitale also has two new books set to be released in 2013.
He's also recorded many Nightingale-Conant audio programs, to name a
few, “The Awakening Course,” “The Missing Secret,” “The Secret to Attracting
Money,” "The Abundance Paradigm" and his latest, "The Ultimate Law of
Attraction Library."
Joe has also been in several movies, including the blockbuster “The Secret.”
He's been on the following TV shows: Larry King Live, Donny Deutsch's "The Big
Idea," CNN, CNBC, CBS, ABC, Fox News: "Fox & Friends" and Extra TV. He's
also been featured in The New York Times and Newsweek.
His latest accomplishment includes being the world's first self-help singersongwriter as seen in 2012's Rolling Stone® magazine. In 2012 alone, he has
released four music CDs with his fifth album just released in 2013!
He created a Miracles Coaching™ program and helps people achieve their
dreams by understanding the deeper aspects of the law of attraction and the law of
right action. This man was once homeless but today is a bestselling author who
believes in magic and miracles.
For more information on Joe Vitale, go to: www.mrfire.com
To contact the author of this book, please e-mail Suzanne@mrfire.com
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