AUGUST 19, 2021 BY DEEWINI
The War on Drugs,
The Truth about
Addiction!
In memory of my big brother
6 months since we said
Goodbye
So many people ask questions like Why
did Damien feel depressed? Was it the
drugs? Was it the alcohol? Damien had
what I called Damo Depression. He had
the ability to be depressed about a
situation but didn’t allow that depression
to seep into other areas of his life. He was able to section his emotions and deal with
what needed to be dealt with at the time. He also had a huge understanding of his
emotions, why he felt the way he did, where they stemmed from, and where they
needed to be placed in his life. He didn’t dwell on things from the past although some
may think that is the root cause of his depression. I asked him one day. I asked him
how he felt about the hang-ups he had growing up. He told me that he gets it. He
expected to be treated a certain way as a child and our parents, going off what they
knew, treated him a different way. He loved them unconditionally and never laid
blame, and always said that he is the man he is today because of everything he has
ever been through good and bad. And let me just say, the man that he was, the man
that I was looking at was a man who never laid a finger on his children despite how
he was brought up, a man who tried his utmost hardest to be the best man he could
be when his marriage ended. The man who made a decision right there that his
children would be the only number one focus in his life from that point on. He took all
his trials and tribulations as lessons and grew from them. He grew into an amazing
man who went out of his way to show people how important it was to be yourself, be
true to yourself, stare diversity in the face and embrace it – don’t shy away from it
and approach all situations with love at the core. “It’s all about love,” he would say.
He is a reflection of the energy he has inside of him, as well as the energy that was
around him his whole life. He just figured out his way of communicating that in his
own time, but he got there.
However, there was a side to Damien that was of a dark nature. Like something or
someone that wasn’t from here and conforming was not an easy task, at any point in
his life. The lowest I’ve ever seen him was in fact way back in the late ’90s when he
was literally lost. He was stuck. In every
meaning of the word, he was stuck. He felt
like he was in a straight jacket and chained
to his surroundings and so isolated. He
loved us, I know that even back then, but he
didn’t belong with us and where we were at
that time. His soul needed to be fed and it
was starving being stuck in the west with
nothing.
NB: Kids let this be a lesson to you, the only way out of where you are is money. If you
want to sow your oats then you will need money. Getting a job is a really good way of
getting those funds that will enable you to move about and find what it is you are
looking for. As painless as possible. Money = freedom. If you don’t want to get a job,
fair enough. My advice then would be to find what you are good at, perfect that talent
then find a way to make money off it. Either way, money is what you need to keep on
moving. Don’t hate it. Love it, respect it and accept it.
Anyway, back to the main character… So for
Damien, this was his biggest problem. He
didn’t have any money. Working was not his
strong point in his early days. It was hard for
him to accept that working mundane and
meaningless jobs was a part of his life. Money
wasn’t a huge concern for him. Neither were
designer clothes or fancy cars. Materialistic
possessions were not important to him
however freedom was and understanding and
then accepting that money was how you found
freedom was his biggest hurdle. He did not
accept it. This may have been what caused so
much struggle for him or it may have been, in
the end, how he came to learn so much about
himself. He was never jaded with shiny things.
His mind was never preoccupied with toys and
gimmicks.
When he was in his early adult years – the Flushcombe Road days, he decided to
move out with his friends and try this independence thing. This was a couple of years
since his friends graduated. In 1998 I’m pretty sure, Antonio, Maurice, Luke and
latecomer Damien moved into an old fibro house on Flushcombe road. Damien had
the front room which faced Flushcombe Road, Antonio and Maurice had a bedroom
each at the back of the house – maybe one was under the house from memory and
Luke had a room that was equivalent to that of a walk-in wardrobe. He was the
neatest one there. He had a job. He had instructions from his mum on how to live like
an adult and did everything he could to follow those instructions. The other guys
made sure that they challenged those instructions making things very confronting for
Luke. I mean they weren’t high school kids anymore, they were young adults learning
how to tackle this big world they had heard so much about. Staying up really late, and
not eating right just didn’t seem like the kind of path they should be travelling.
Needless to say, Luke was the first one to go
back home. Antonio, who also had a job and
a degree was not far behind Luke and
headed home for some structure and
grounding – good thing he did. His discipline
in his career saw him win the Telstra Aria
Music Teacher of the Year Award in 2019. A
proud moment for all of us to see. Maurice
stuck it out as long as he could but I would
imagine not having any food ever or money
was starting to take its toll, except for the
trooper of all troopers, Damo. He managed
to get a few people here and there to move
in with him and share the rent. He dabbled in selling some ecstasy pills, some kind
gentlemen gave them to him on credit and wondered where the money was a week
later. He soon found out, Damo + Drugs + credit = BIG DEBT. Regardless, he was
there right up until the last day of the lease which was only a six-month lease and
also the day before the house was being demolished (officially). He came home after
that to a granny flat that my parents built for him for his 21st birthday. This was his
taste of independence which was supposed to help show him slowly how to be a
responsible adult but that didn’t come for at least
another 6 to 8 years when he became a Dad!
That’s when the process started anyway (hehe).
He stepped up eventually, got the job, bought
into the property with Nicole and did the best he
could. He did it his way, albeit not the way our
fathers did, but he did it. That was the
compromise. There was still one hang-up. One
that he conquered each and every time it
became impactful on his life, but it kept creeping
up somewhere…. Addiction.
Some would say that he had an addictive
personality which used to bug me so much.
I found that using the term “addictive personality” was an easy way out and
prevented anyone from going deeper to find the root cause of the addiction. The
addictive personality was the diagnosis but it was a surface diagnosis. Nowhere near
what was needed to fully understand Damien.
Damo and drugs, or rather, Damo and addiction. This is what needs to be spoken
about more than anything else. I’ve nursed him back from so many very low points,
I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve done it over the years. When I was 18 and he
was 20, I drove him all over the place one Saturday afternoon while he struggled to
find somewhere he felt at peace. I drove him to friends' places and to family’s places
and he was just so lost, wired and tired and just needed to rest but everywhere we
went he just felt disconnected from us. In the end, we came home and we spoke to
mum and dad and they asked him if he would like to go to Brisbane and spend some
time with family friends up there and have some time out. He said yes. He was so
tired and just wanted somewhere peaceful to rest. This was one of those moments
when I thought I was going to lose my brother. The angst that he felt that day was
painful to watch. I didn’t quite understand what was going on with him but I knew that
I couldn’t leave him and just needed to be wherever he was to make sure he felt
loved. He always felt so troubled. Like he needed to break free and I found it so
confusing back then because we had pretty lenient parents who gave us plenty of
room to be who we wanted to be. I didn’t realise for Damien that it was more than
that. He didn’t take well to such micromanaged society and judgments. That’s what
made him feel so alienated out here in the west. He stood out too much in his eyes,
he felt everyone was always watching him and waiting to pounce on him with
judgement and ridicule. The drugs were the first way he found he was able to quieten
the noise in his head. This and music, however, the noise managed to creep in even
when it came to his music. He just didn’t belong out here, he felt.
Recently, I watched a Ted talk about addiction and it was the best explanation that I
had heard in relation to the cause of the addiction, and ultimately why addiction sticks
around. I thought for the purpose of self-educating it couldn’t hurt if I reiterate the Ted
Talk bit by bit and show how it relates to those that we have witnessed battle
addiction. Maybe we could all learn something so that history never repeats itself and
this could be an area where we can evolve. If we as a whole could expand our minds
to see this grey area a little clearer, it could mean the world of difference for so many.
It could be life-changing on a scale that we have only ever dreamed of.
The Ted talk was conducted by Johann Hari, a British-Swiss
writer and journalist. He was very informative and very
thorough with his research. I have gone back and looked up
his references and found so much more astounding
statistics. Focusing though on this particular talk, I’d like to
share what I learned. I learned that what we have been
taught is not accurate at all. What we know about drugs and
alcohol and addiction are tales that have been told to us over the generations. For
example, We are taught that it only takes one time using heroin to become addicted
to it. This is also said about Ice. But let’s just stick to heroin for a moment. We are
taught that it’s the drug that will take you whole and once it has you, it will never let
you go. Poems have been written and dramatised to really get this point across. Now
here’s something to think about, what about those who are in hospital with legitimate
medical needs and need to be sedated or kept in a comfortable pain-free state in
order for their ailment to subside. What is the main drug that is used for this purpose,
Morphine right? How many of us have had morphine given to us (some of us on tap)
and have come out as heroin addicts? I would say none! Morphine would be the
purest form of heroin, an uncut grade-A drug. Yet we aren’t all itching and scratching
and fidgeting or crying in pain because we are withdrawing. So what’s the difference?
When we come home from the hospital, for the majority of us, we come home to
loving family and friends who are there showing us love and support. We are fulfilled.
Almost instantly. What happens to those who don’t have that to come home to. I can
say as a first-hand witness when that reception is the kind one would hope for and
they don’t receive it, the alternative is finding comfort elsewhere. They look for the
option that comforts them and indulge in that for that constant feeling of comfort.
Pending the choice of comfort, some suffer overdoses as a result. The comfort is
drugs, generally.
There have been experiments conducted on mice and humans to study this theory.
For instance, the study on mice was:
Study #1 – A mouse in a cage with two bottles of water. One bottle was plain water
and the other was water laced with heroin. The mouse was alone and almost 99% of
the time chose the bottle laced with heroin. Why?
Study #2 – Professor Bruce Alexander, who
created the initial experiment, went further by
creating “Rat Park”. This place had lots of
cheese and coloured balls to play with and other
mice to play with and mate with etc. This place
had both plain water and drug water. The
interesting thing is that almost none of them used
the drug water exclusively. They may have a
taste every now and then but didn’t opt for it on a
regular basis. The stats went from 100%
overdose when the mouse was isolated to 0%
overdose when they are within the community and are connected to others. Living
happy connected lives.
Luckily for us, we don’t have to compare ourselves to rats or mice for too long,
because a human study was conducted also and we have all witnessed the results.
The big experiment took place during the Vietnam war. In Vietnam, 20% of all
American troops were using enormous amounts of heroin. Now when the war was
over these soldiers were followed home. The end result – of those who were heavy
users of heroin, once returned to their families, simply just stopped. 95% of them just
stopped. This was studied by the Archives of General Psychology. “They didn’t go to
rehab, they didn’t have withdrawals – they simply just stopped”.
These studies have basically proven that chemical
hooks and what we are told causes addiction is not
entirely accurate. Perhaps we should be looking at this
from a different perspective, which we should’ve been
doing in the first place considering addiction comes in all
shapes and sizes such as gambling, shopping, eating,
devices, etc… Is it a chemical that everyone is getting
addicted to or is it something else? Is it perhaps,
bonding? According to Professor Peter Cohen from the
Netherlands, Human Beings have a natural and innate
need to bond. When we are happy and life is going
according to plan, we will bond and connect with each
other. But what about those who can’t do that? What
happens to those who are socially challenged for a
variety of reasons such as traumatised, isolated or life has just gotten a hold of you in
the most negative of ways and being in a mindset to bond is not possible, at that
moment in time? This is where addiction is born. When those people find something
that gives them some sort of relief. Cooking, gambling, porn and drugs, whatever it is,
they will bond with it and then there forms a relationship/friendship that others can’t
quite understand.
For those who can relate, you get it!
For those of you who are not addicted to something that has caused a problem in
your life, I think you will find if you look at your life objectively, you have bonds and
ties that you want to be present for right? You may have jobs that you love or
activities you are a part of that you look forward to and you have a reason to want to
be present because your life is rewarding. Those who find themselves addicted to
something generally don’t want to be present in their lives. For whatever reason that
is, their life is not offering rewards or fulfilment, they don’t seem to fit themselves in
anywhere to form the bonds or create ties that they need to be attached to.
This is where society comes along. We don’t realise just how much we impact the
lives of addicts through our justice system and through society. Above anything else,
we need to remember and acknowledge that addiction is an illness.
What is drug addiction? Addiction is defined as a chronic, relapsing disorder
characterised by compulsive drug seeking, continued use despite harmful
consequences, and long-lasting changes in the brain.
https://www.drugabuse.gov/publications/media-guide/science-drug-use-addiction-basics
We also need to remember and acknowledge that addiction doesn’t just refer to
drugs and that it comes in all shapes and sizes.
A person with an addiction uses a substance, or engages in a behaviour, for which the
rewarding effects provide a compelling incentive to repeat the activity, despite
detrimental consequences….
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/addiction
The sad thing is, in most countries, there is only one addiction that is treated in the
criminal court while all other addictions can be treated through healthcare services.
Why is it that drug addicts are treated this way? It isn’t productive or solution-based.
Except in the eyes of the justice system which in turn
is the government and their objective on a small
scale is to help but the main objective as a whole is
punishment.
For instance, if you are an addict in Australia and are caught with drugs in your
possession, depending on the quantity of drugs you have in your possession, there
are two options straight up. If the quantity is under a certain amount you are offered
the option of having your matter dealt with in Drug Court, separate from the Criminal
Court. Your option after that is a place at a rehab facility. Essentially, you are offered
help. On the other hand, If you are caught with an amount that is indictable then you
are automatically charged as a supplier and your matter will start in the local court but
once a plea is entered and the matter is committed either for trial or for sentencing,
your matter will be moved into the District Criminal Court. Regardless of whether you
are a supplier or not. The said amount in possession could well be what one may
have as a personal supply. Some people have addictions that stem further than the
drug itself. The legislation in the state of NSW says that you ARE a supplier,
therefore, you are not able to go to rehab, that offer doesn’t exist and instead, you
are tried and committed in the criminal court and your option for rehab is jail. You may
receive an Intensive Corrections Order (ICO) where you are able to serve your
sentence amongst the community under strict conditions. You will have a conviction
against your name, you will be supervised by Community Corrections which is like
Correction officers on the outside, and you are basically looking at a life of isolation
anyway. It will be difficult to get a job. There are many insurance policies that become
unavailable to you, and you are restricted from doing and living the way your
neighbour lives. In reality, a supplier is generally just a user who is offloading some of
their shares in order to support their habits. In order to buy more basically. It
generates a community of others in the same boat. It keeps scammers and thieves
out of the circle but only dealing with their own and this is in itself how all the
disconnected, connect really. This is a general description and I am sure there is an
exception. The point is, they are not criminals and treating them as such is only
breaking them more.
Let’s take away the justice system for a moment. Let’s focus on everyday living.
Times have changed in the workforce somewhat over the past 10 years. We now
have drug testing at work, job sites and on the road. In the World Drug Report 2020,
it was recorded that around 269 million people used drugs worldwide. You would be
surprised at how many of those people you rubbed shoulders with on a regular basis.
From lawyers to doctors, to kindergarten teachers and nurses. Police officers,
security officers, court officers, CEOs of companies, you name it – a large portion of
the population is or has been on drugs. That’s a concern within itself but that is
addressed later on. What is more of a concern is what happens to these high
functioning people who have remained under the radar with their drug use, fail their
drug tests and lose their job or lose their licence and then lose their job? Yes, they
could clean up and get another job, but in reality, it’s more likely that they would
recluse into isolation and let their addiction take over them. This is depending of
course on the level of their addiction. In saying the blow that comes with such high
impact results as losing your job (what most would think) is social ridicule. “What are
people going to say”? “What answers can be given”? Do you hide the truth or own it?
“What are the repercussions now that it’s out”? These 3-4 questions are enough to
force anyone into isolation where they now don’t want to be present in their lives.
What was a controlled perhaps even recreational activity will now become an
addiction. We could treat drugs like alcohol. If anything, from what I’ve seen and in
my opinion, drugs are a better choice over alcohol. I’ve seen the effects of both on a
number of people and hands down those people on drugs as opposed to alcohol
were 10 times better.
Alcohol addiction is a disease that changes the way the brain works. It causes
negative emotions, impulsive behaviour, cravings and withdrawal symptoms.
https://www.drugrehab.com/addiction/alcohol/
People are not ostracised for drinking alcohol unless they turn up to work drunk or try
to drive a car after drinking. Drinking impairs your judgement, no questions. Of
course, I do too, but like alcohol, it is manageable if consumed responsibly, wisely
and taken in moderation. Obviously, you wouldn’t want to munch on some dried
magic mushrooms before going to work in a pre-school with 100 screaming kids or
even in an office where you have to function because that wouldn’t work out very
well. For some people, it’s like Ritalin and it balances them, and for others, it could be
how they manage pain. Whatever the reason may be. It’s their personal choice if they
choose drugs as their vice. It shouldn’t be an invitation to treat them as second class
citizens. My point with this is if we look at addiction from a different perspective, we
have the ability to therefore remove a very damaging stigma that sits around drug
addiction and contributes to ongoing damage. If someone has a bender weekend on
alcohol and word gets out, it’s labelled a bender. So what? No big deal. They’ll sleep
it off and all will be well. When in fact, there would be so many signs that probably
should be addressed but are not. If someone decides to have a bender on pills one
weekend and goes dancing for two nights and gets caught sneaking into the house at
lunchtime in the same clothes they left in two nights before, it becomes a serious
matter. The questions start, “How long has it been going on”? “Who were you with”?
“Are they on drugs“? “How long have you been on drugs”? Why can’t that person
just sleep it off and be on their merry way in the morning? Too much attention and
finger-pointing cause social ridicule and one to feel complexed about their behaviour.
Unnecessary angst is caused. Perhaps the word addiction wouldn’t be used so often
or used sparingly if it was accepted the way alcohol is socially accepted with people
at liberty to have a drink or two when they wish. Without being labelled, judged or
frowned upon. By doing that we have an opportunity to eliminate possible isolation
and instead let people get on with their lives whichever way they choose. Like
alcohol, if they decide they need help and want to stop then they can go down that
road.
The war on drugs is the worst idea the world ever had. It has been the biggest cause
of stigmatisation and isolation over anything else. There are some countries however
that took a different approach to the war and how they were going to battle it. Take
Portugal. Under the advice of Dr Joao Goulao, who led an advisory panel that was
asked to review all the evidence on the increase of drug addiction that they were
witnessing and to provide recommendations as to how their government should
handle this. Their advice was to completely legalise all drugs. So they did. This came
with a list of recommendations which they also took on board. They took the money
that they used to spend on convicting drug addicts and they put that money back into
the community as a way of support, helping them have a life of substance and not
just a life full of A substance. They took that money and created jobs and microloans
for addicts. For instance, they offered any trade if they were to take on an addict as
an apprentice the government would pay half their wages. The “goal was to make
sure that every addict had something to get out of bed for” and be in a position to
reconnect to society as a whole. All the addicts needed to do was rediscover purpose
which in turn showed them how to rediscover bonds and connections with the wider
society. You see addicts tend to hang around other addicts of course (Like attracts
like – you can’t escape the Universe). They needed to see that they had the ability to
form bonds outside of those circles that they were so used to being in and be able to
open their eyes and see a wider horizon. It’s been 15 years since Portugal did this.
To this day the census is: injecting drug users are down by 50%, Overdoses, HIV and
addiction in all aspects and studies are significantly down and the drug-related crime
rate is almost non-existent.
The scary part of this Ted talk was the
end when he dissected our current
society which can be called the most
‘connected’ society of all because we
have the ability to connect with anyone
and anything at our fingertips, but
really, how connected are we? We
think we are by the number of followers
we have or the number of people that
comment on our posts etc. But when
you face a crisis, who turns up to offer you physical support? Your physical
connections, and your flesh and blood. It’ll be the ones you have known forever that
will be there for you. A study showed the number of people an American would call
when in a crisis has been steadily dropping since the late 1950s, and the amount of
floor space an American has, has increased steadily since the 1950s. We have
traded friends for floor space and connections for stuff and in reality, we are one of
the loneliest societies that have ever been. Hence why a good portion of the
population is on drugs or addicted to something… disconnect = addiction.
In relation to addiction – we should be talking about individual recovery as that is
important for each person’s journey, however as this ted talk explains, we need to be
talking about social recovery. As a group, something has gone wrong where life for a
lot of us looks a lot like that cage and less like Rat Park. We can’t change society in
one click of a finger, of course not. However, we can change how we interact with the
ones we love. How do we help them or how do we change so that they are able to
get better? It isn’t easy loving an addict. That is something that takes a lot of patience
and discipline and commitment. Old ways like Interventions are not in any way
positive unless the message changes. It used to be “we love you and we don’t want
to see you hurt yourself, please stop all drugs otherwise we are going to have to cut
you off.” I’m not saying that my family ever said that to anyone but I know that the
isolation was definitely there. Without intention, it was still there. Not being able to
relate to anyone anymore, or so one would think, therefore you isolate. It’s that
simple. You cut yourself off before anyone else can. This is because there is an
unwritten rule that basically says “you have to be like us and act the way we want you
to or our relationships are not going to work” – pressure on the behaviour of an
addict and all the connections the addict has. That is currently how addicts are
dealt with. If we all adopt a bit of Portugal and follow in their footsteps by taking a
different approach like telling the addicts in your life that you love them and if they
need you they can call you and you will sit with them for as long as it takes until they
feel that love and that connection again. REBUILD CONNECTIONS, genuine
connections so that isolation is a thing of the past. Not define them by their addictions
or their mental health or whatever is causing them to go down this road. Offer them
the support they need so that they are able to feel those connections again and start
to get a feel for life again. Rather than creating a war on drugs, we should be singing
love songs to the addicts. “We love you and you are not alone” should be the core
message on every level from personal to political and social. It is a disease and has
no place in the criminal court. There are people who are addicted to drugs for pain
management and are isolated from society because of that. There are some who
face time in jail for their addiction where they will get no treatment for their pain.
They’ll spend time with others hard done by addicts who are in jail also. This is
generally how you make a criminal. It’s been drilled into their head now to the point
where they are now in jail, you can be guaranteed when they come out that’s what
they’ll be. The alternative would be to listen to that person explain what he/she is
going through, how the drugs help and find out if they really are helping or is it the
bond that they have formed when they felt they had no one else? Is it an illusion that
the drugs are taking the pain away? Is the pain only there as a manifestation of the
emotions that are running deep which are the feelings of loneliness and isolation from
those you love? The drugs fill that void, hence taking away the pain and also causing
a wider spread between you and your loved ones.
Love and support – create and recreate connections with those you love, with the
addicts in your life. Stop seeing them as addicts and see them as family or friends,
but see them as people who need those connections in order to feel alive again. That
is our job here on earth is to make as many people as we can feel loved and
connected to something. Because those who don’t feel a deep connection to this
world and this life, are the ones that leave us so quickly. Less judging and more
support that’s all we need to do. As a whole, we could change the world!!
#changeiscoming
“The opposite to addiction is not sobriety, the opposite to
addiction is connection”
Johann Hari
Be Inspired, Be Mindful, Be You!
Dee Wini