Assertive Communication
Directions: Use the steps below to effectively assert your needs. Take notes where needed.
Directly describe the situation.
Describe the hard facts about the situation that is causing you to need to communicate.
Express your feelings and accountability.
Take accountability for your role in the situation. Use expressive “I” statements, not “you are/do/can’t”
statements.
Assert your needs in a respectful way.
Assert your point of view and your needs. Stand up for yourself and what you are expressing.
Reinforce what you have expressed and your perspective in the situation.
Express how you have been affected by the situation in a non-accusatory way.
Mindful thinking and reacting is key.
When disagreeing with someone, tensions will rise. Stay in control of your emotions. Remember the goal
is resolution. Approach controversy from a calm and mindful place.
Appear to be confident.
Nobody will be confident in your perspective if you are not confident in your perspective yourself. Be
sure to reflect on what you want to communicate before you begin the discussion.
Negotiate
The goal is not to get your way. The goal is to find compromise, where you are met halfway.
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