Improving Affective Statements Using NVC
Typical Response
Affective Statement
Example
NVC Version
Stop calling Sandy a pig.
You made me uncomfortable
when you called Sandy a
pig.
When I heard you call Sandy a name I felt worried
because I value respect. Would you be willing to tell
me what was going on?
You shouldn’t do that.
I feel sad when you are
disrupting my class.
Sit down and be quiet in my
class.
You make me angry when
you talk in my class.
I don’t want to see you
fighting him.
I was shocked that you hurt
him while fighting.
Talking during class is not
allowed.
I am frustrated that you are
not listening.
You never turn in your
homework on time.
I am angry that you don’t
think this class is important.