WEBVTT
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I think it's time so let's go ahead and welcome people in and I'll
still talk as though we're letting them in a minute. early already I'm
going to start that webinar.
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Oh good Michelle and Kelly I like to make sure that we get the
webinar, live for people who are like everyone right now moving when
their computer dings at them will let people log in and have a moment
with us behind the scenes here, like the pregame
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the pre show great as you're logging in friends if you want to
introduce yourselves in the chat then we'll know that you're hearing
and seeing us okay.
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It's great as you're logging in friends if you want to introduce
yourselves in the chat then we'll know that you're hearing and seeing
us okay. Glad you're here. It's an important topic.
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Come on in.
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And if we were in person I'd invite everybody to kick the seat down
front.
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Hi Scott from deep south Texas, and Diane from Southern California.
Whoa, the scrolling of it.
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Feeling in there for Wendy. What did I miss. I saw New Zealand in
there. Oh, that's wonderful. Welcome. Oh gosh.
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Michelle and Kelly you've brought people from across the country and
around the globe. I'm excited to share the discussion with everyone.
That's great.
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Well it is teacher time so I'll move us right into our discussion and
welcome everybody, as, as people are logging in of course the first
thing that I always do if you've been in a webinar with me before you
know I like to take care of the housekeeping,
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and housekeeping question number one is always Will this be recorded
and Can I have the slides and, yes, we are educators working with and
for educators so of course the recording will be available, happy to
share slides with you and my team has done
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a great job recently of capturing the chat. So we'll also make the
chat log available to you which means you're going to get all of the
enrichment from your colleagues across the country and around the
globe.
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That tells me I want to make sure we encourage the use of the chat and
so let's do that by having an opening chat here, if you've already
introduced yourself and that you've shared where you are, that's fine
you can do it again, but I'd also love to ask
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everybody to move into the topic with me and an offer, whatever is on
your mind related to Sal. So take a moment now, open your chat if you
haven't, then while you're doing that take note when you are typing
down at the bottom you can send to all panelists,
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but actually you want to send to all panelists and attendees, because
if you send to just the panelists the rest of you joining will not be
able to see the comments so use the drop down send to all panelists,
and attendees, and that will make our conversation
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particularly rich in the chat today so we'll save the recording will
have slides and we'll have the chat box so do enjoy making
recommendations and sharing observations and examples in the chat log
today so looking forward to whatever is on your mind
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related to SEO, while you all are finishing that warm up chat. I will
say welcome officially you are here for SEO as a way of being, and I
can't think of a more important topic and education right now it is
really our well being.
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I will welcome everybody. You're not here to speak to me so let me
introduce the featured guests today.
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Glad you're here I'll let you introduce yourself a little bit more
through the course of our discussion. I'm also joined by Keely Keller,
Director of professional learning at learners edge, Kelly has worked
with Michelle's book called start with the heart
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and his created a three credit. Continuing Education course and so our
conversation today is about that content, and how to really consider
it as a practitioner, so I welcome both of you with heartfelt
excitement about about being here, Michelle Can I
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ask you to start first and share why this topic has become so
important to you, to the point of publishing a book about it.
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Absolutely. Thanks for asking Wendy and I'm so grateful to be here and
I just love seeing the attendees everybody from everywhere. This topic
is crucial today, it's always been important to me.
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And looking at it through the lens of a way of being, I think is more
important than anything because so many of us we know being in the
classroom, whether it be, you know, we say educator we're talking
about teachers, administrators counselors social
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workers librarians bus drivers, anybody
students and families within the school
need to be aware of our students social
of ours, it's got to start with us, and
striving to meet the needs of
community. We really not only
and emotional well being, but
we
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know if we've been in the trenches, we don't need more to do.
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People are overwhelmed, especially right now. So when we look at how
we be, and I know my grammar is off there.
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How do we be a bunch of educators, but it really it's about our state
of being. How do we be in the way that we interact with the world
around us, and with the humans around us.
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That's where social emotional learning starts. I can hear already have
your personal commitment to the discussion into the topic, Kelly you
were inspired by Michelle's book, can you talk a little bit about how
you take something as precious as her book
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and create a course around it very carefully. Well, I should say to
immediately when I broke open Michelle's book I connected. I was a
former Program Coordinator at a setting for and day treatment program
for for students who couldn't stay or be educated
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in their their mainstream school and that for me, it was just so
obvious that students needed that base of social emotional learning
social skills to even start to understand the academic components that
we're trying to teach them right and so at that
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point I just really connected with Michelle and then all everything in
the book is just so clickable it made writing the course very easy.
And I've always had an interest in teacher burnout or educator
wellness.
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And for me, the idea of adult
the interest that I've had in
teachers are focused on their
them is also focused on their
Sal just paired up so nicely with, with
the past, around making sure that
well being and that everybody around
well being because will
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both students and teachers need to have those basic needs met before
they can do their job and for the student that's learning
academically, and for the teacher that's teaching but but as you know
your bucket has to be full before you can feel the bucket
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of others and so that's, that's why I was really wanting to use
Michelle's text in. In, of course.
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I'm going to pause the screen sharing for just a moment so that we can
enjoy a conversation between the three of us, I'd love to hear a
little bit about how you all connected originally and what that
conversation was like can you share that with us.
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Yeah, so we typically try to reach out to the authors of the, of the
course text and so I reached out to Michelle and she immediately got
back to me and that I think we just became fast friends.
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She was so excited to hear about the fact that we were using the
course text and, you know, like I said, we have very similar
backgrounds, as it was professionally, and then just turn our ideas
lined up quite well.
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One of the things that that Michelle talks about in the book is the
word love, and love in school and how a lot of people feel like school
is not the place for love.
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But for me, seeing some of the challenges that the students that I had
worked with had gone through, in my mind, school sometimes is the
safest place a student can be in their day.
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And it may be the only place where they're experiencing love. And so,
you know, that was Michelle and I just connected very easily over that
idea and the idea of just the base of social emotional learning being
so important.
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Michelle would you add to that, well I just have to say when Keeley
reached out to me, she said I got right back to her and I did because
I was thrilled.
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And I was thrilled because I really.
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This book was born in my school, the school of which I was a
principal, and it was an alternative education High School, and we
built it on the foundation of family and of love and of second
chances, and all of that is born in social emotional learning
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or social emotional learning is born in those concepts. And so when QE
reached out to me. I just, I want to share with something works, and
whether the name is social emotional learning, whether we look at it
as social emotional well being.
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It is a timeless necessary way of being, regardless of what it's
called. And I knew as a principal and as a teacher, that it is
something that touched kids in the way that caused them to want to be
in school, to believe in themselves to want to achieve.
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So when she reached out and I realized that this is a way to share
this idea of social emotional learning with even more educators, I was
thrilled and feel humbled and blessed to be part of the project for
certain Michelle, can you tell us a little bit
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more about your background.
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Oh absolutely, I you know I have spent over 25 years as a teacher and
then as a principal, most of my career I spent in the realm of
alternative education so have always been drawn to finding
opportunities for students to be able to find success, and
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whatever that sex success looks like for them personally and
academically and alternative education was a way to do that we have to
think outside the box do things a little bit differently.
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Still with high expectations and high rigor and and that's how I lived
as an educator in the classroom and in school and it's how I live
today as an author and I do a great deal of professional learning
facilitation and a lot of speaking, you know, I
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really believe that if we can tune into the heart of our kids and our
colleagues and ourselves when we cannot neglect ourselves.
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Then, then we're going to be on the right path with helping kids to
achieve academically, I mean we know our schools are measured by, you
know, academics we want our kids to be successful academically, but
we've got to meet them here first.
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I'm grateful to hear that your focus on this topic has existed for a
long time because I've been concerned that people are just newly aware
of Sal considerations as we come out of really disrupted learning,
years, too.
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And so, so there's some relief I'm feeling here hearing about your
long standing commitment in your, in your work you have identified the
seven keys to connection.
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And I wonder if we can transition and have a discussion about some of
the specifics that you have there said that, why don't we start here.
Yeah, absolutely at you know as you as you say that Wendy I'm thinking
as educators are listening to this, oftentimes
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you hear the term SEO.
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And I think educators think curriculum, or they think you know well I
have these lesson plans I was given that I'm supposed to do with my
kids. And so as you jump into these keys to have Connect keys to
connection, I think it's important that we think
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of SEO as not only as a way of being, but let's just dip our toe into,
how do we practice and model, social emotional learning and what is
social emotional learning and really what it comes down to is
emotional and social connection.
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And that's where these keys are born.
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So can I just throw a question in the chat at inviting people to
consider, do you teach Sal or do you live.
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So we'll put that in the chat while you talk us through the seven keys
and in Kenya would love to hear how and if these are incorporated in
the course.
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Yeah, leave right away I grabbed on to this and the reason that I did
that is because I'm always looking for things that are just Uber
applicable to the practitioner, and these are things that anybody in
any role in a school can do.
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And so that's why I made it actually the first assignment in in the
course is to really think about the seven keys to connection and dig a
little bit deeper into them and then authentically figure out how are
you going to do this in your role.
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And so, you know, it was really easy to identify it as something, I
know that that I wanted to take out of the book and then have have
course participants actually work through and look at and figure out
how am I going to implement these things and and
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what's beautiful about these seven keys, is the fact that they're very
simple, but the tricky thing is, if you're looking at them. I mean,
oftentimes when we ask somebody how they're doing we're walking
directly past them.
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How are you, you're already past. So, um, you know, for me, it was all
about intentionality and really getting to okay stop, I actually have
to physically stop my body to have this conversation.
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And I want to and you have to start to be really intentional about how
you're connecting and then square up square your shoulders off
actually look at the person you know so I'll let Michelle talk through
that, but for me it was a good reminder that there's,
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there has to be intentionality behind these things, and it's okay to
stop and have a genuine connection moment, whether it be with a
student or a colleague, or someone else in your building, we have to
give ourselves permission to have those those moments.
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Yeah, Michelle.
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It is also very true that there are times that people don't have time
to stop. You're walking from point A to point B, if you don't have
time. Then don't ask the question, how are you as a great example.
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So if you just have to get to your classroom and you have to get there
fast. Then continue walking and say hi. Great to see you. Hope you
have a great day.
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But don't ask the How are you question. If you're going to ask the How
are you question, it is so important to stop, look a person in the
eye, ask the question How are you, or anything else.
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And then listen for the answer, because if we don't take time to stop
and listen. Then what we're demonstrating is that we don't care even
if we do, we know we're caring professionals and caring people.
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That's why we've chosen this vocation, but to actually be intentional
and thoughtful about taking time to stop, look, ask. And listen, and
when you ask how are you and you listen to the answer, ultimately that
student the next day when you say hey, how's
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your dad doing you know yesterday you were having a rough day because
he was having a rough day, and that kids going to say, oh my gosh she
remembered or she remembered.
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And then it's going to begin to build relationships which as we know,
is a social emotional learning skills so these are just little ways of
being within our everyday lives that we either are intentional about,
or we aren't, so stop, look, ask, and listen.
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Let's talk about smiling authentically though because this one and the
next one, are key in this time of. I want to call it post coven but we
are really in the midst of it still and challenges of the pandemic are
going to continue I think to stay with
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us. And so, the importance of smiling authentically is to part now.
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I used to say, we need to smile and smile from our heart so that it
comes through our actual smile and through our eyes.
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Today we have to remember that oftentimes, our mouth is covered. So,
we have to not always smile with joy from our hearts, when we address
someone or greet someone, but use their names and then be able to say,
you may not be able to tell because I'm wearing
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this mask but my heart and my mouth is smiling so big right now so
because I'm so grateful that you're here, or you're with me, so that
intentionality back to, we've got sometimes articulate what we're
doing if they can't actually see us.
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And keep in mind, you know, suck at it when we smile and and just look
at you when you're looking at your face. It helps me as I see you
smiling. I have a release of dopamine and serotonin, that makes me
feel better twice my leads contagious.
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There was a nice comment in here from Charlotte, who said, People tell
me that I smile with my eyes so Charlotte is winning the mask
situation.
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We do have to we have to push a little bit. I don't know if you can
get away with a with a serious face and I squint like a, like fake
when I think people are going to be able to sort those out, you know
from under the mask but it is true, a smile is
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something it's hard not to return and and smiling changes, what's
happening inside of us if we could start our day even the alarm goes
off instead of grounding first maybe we could make ourselves smile for
a moment.
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Yeah, we all look in the mirror, or most of the time right we look in
the mirror when we get up in the morning, why not help ourselves to
that, yes, that joy.
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Maybe just a posted on the mirror that the smile. I mean, you know,
that's some of these ideas are so simple and so easy but yet it does
again take that intentionality to actually do the thing or remind
yourself, until it becomes a habit, why not prompt
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ourselves. Yes, I can. You want me to go on Wendy because I get a
little bit more, we've got we've looked at five now we spend a moment
here on smiling, connecting kinesthetically.
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Let's go here. Yes, especially right now so I have always been a big
proponent of connecting kinesthetically and what am i mean by that,
shaking hands high fives fist bumps.
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Something that also releases not only dopamine and serotonin but
oxytocin and helps us to feel more more focused help us concentrate
better and helps kids to feel recognized seen and heard right.
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And today, maybe not responsible and not safe to actually shake hands.
And so we need to be careful about this kinesthetic connection, when
it's appropriate is important, and there's brain science connected to
it.
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But there are ways that we can connect emotionally and socially
without actually touching. I mean, if, if we use Kinect kinesthetic
connection as a handshake.
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Just think about a metaphorical handshake so we reach out to shake
someone's hand. Our hands are open, right. So if we think of that idea
of opening our hands.
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Our hearts our minds to one another. By using someone's name when it's
appropriate because it's not always looking them in the eye.
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Being able to get on I level with someone, especially if you're
working with younger kids to get down on a knee, even though you have
that physical distance just to say, I'm here, I want to be connected
with you even connecting with something that they
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are connected to. So if a kid is at a desk to be able to just place
your hand on the desk and look them in the eye and say, Johnny so glad
to see you today, and I missed you yesterday, and I'm glad you're in
my classroom today it just says connection
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is important.
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Michelle the chat is asking, what to do in a virtual environment we
certainly have a number of educational environments that will continue
to be hybrid or virtual for a while, and an answer also came in the
chat suggesting an air hug so if it can't be
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this, you know maybe here, grab a hug from me Kelly nice the air high
five. I'm a big one for making the heart on the screen when I do share
some love for other people, offering some shine so I think we have to
make the effort even in a virtual space
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Michelle is there anything else you would offer in that particular
context and virtual. Absolutely. Again, I think it goes back to the
importance of emotional and social connection one of the very first
things we can start doing is stop using the term
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social distancing.
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Want to socially Connect. So let's be intentional about saying,
although we have to be physically distance or although we're living in
this virtual classroom.
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This is still our class family, we still want to get to know each
other. You can ask very low risk questions about, you know, favorite,
I don't know favorite pastime something you enjoy doing after school,
just a little bit of sharing as a check in with
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each other using students names as a way to emotionally collect
connect it doesn't matter if you're virtual or not, but encouraging
kids to just participate and engage giving them opportunities, be it
through some limited choices you know do you like
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this or do you like this, but also being cognizant of your
demographics and your students and what are they bringing with them
into the classroom we need to be able to seek to understand what our
kids are living in in this moment there are so many students
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up against all odds, and when we show that we care, and we may be even
articulate, I might not understand what you all are going through, but
I want you to know I'm here.
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That is a way to emotionally connect. We can't pretend just see right
through that right, but to be able to say, I'm with you. I want to
understand so tell me more.
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That so those moments are not a waste of time it's an investment of
time.
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Carolyn in the chat was saying that she likes to start class with
roses and thorns and, sir, things that people want to celebrate or
things that might have been a little Auchi and gives gives people a
chance to share what's going on in their individual
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lives so, yeah.
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I love that it wasn't Carolyn you said Wendy. Yes, right.
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I love that activity and I also like taking it a step further to say
what might it take to turn that Thorn into a rose, you know, let's,
let's just think about that what might it take and.
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And what do we want to, what can we maybe tentatively look forward to.
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So, another peaches and pits lemons and lemonade work. Don't worry
when I meant it when I said you would get the chat so that that will
be captured and shared and we'll all have new vocabulary to help our
students understand that we care about what's
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happening to them and we want to be part of an environment where that
sharing is allowed. I love, I love, I love the the flipping like the
lemon and the lemonade it really helps I could see that even though
I'm struggling with something right now there
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are positives there are silver linings and if I flip my script of the
term I use a lot with my script, I might be able to move in a more
positive direction that way.
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I show true QA but I also think it's important that we remember that
some of our students and some of our colleagues, may be going through
things that we don't understand that we don't have any concept about.
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So when we begin to open up this sharing and create these connections.
We do have to be very careful to help and not harm to keep things, low
risk, and to be able also though to say, you know, would you hold
tight and talk with me after class because
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I want to pursue this further and then be able to maybe refer to a
counselor school social worker or somebody that might be able to help
guide that student or colleague, for that matter, through what they're
going through, maybe being a listening ear
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is is enough sometimes. Yes, you know less is more. My husband says it
all the time. If we listen more and talk less. That helps us to
connect as well.
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I'm going to go ahead Keeley, I'll say that when when students have
experienced some trauma and they're sharing those things with you that
one of the best things that you can say is just, I'm sorry that you
experienced that or I'm sorry that that occurred,
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and you don't necessarily have to go into the, you know, into the
counseling mode but just to let them hear that you're sorry that that
has occurred for them.
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Yeah.
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I started to say, Michelle that I was not going to allow you to not
talk because I want to hear about believing intentionally number seven
key number seven.
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This is huge and it's huge in so many different ways so I'm going to
let me focus on believing in our students and the importance of that
but then I also want to talk a little bit especially in this coven era
of believing in ourselves.
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And I don't know how many of you out there are familiar with and Wendy
and Keely if you're familiar with john had his work is his looked at a
variety of factors that impact student achievement or student
learning, and the leading influence on student
00:26:41.000 --> 00:26:56.000
leader, learning is something called collective teacher efficacy, and
I was changed that a little bit I hope john doesn't mind but I always
say teacher collective educator advocacy because I, I truly believe
we're all educators regardless of the role
00:26:56.000 --> 00:27:02.000
we serve within the educational community. And really what that means.
00:27:02.000 --> 00:27:12.000
Collective teacher or educator advocacy means it's our belief in our
students ability to achieve.
00:27:12.000 --> 00:27:24.000
And our belief in each other as a group collectively to make an impact
on their learning like we know that we can make a difference for them.
If we believe in them.
00:27:24.000 --> 00:27:37.000
And we believe in ourselves, they're going to achieve academically,
and that believing showing them that we believe really goes back to
some of this emotional and social connection.
00:27:37.000 --> 00:27:54.000
It's so important that we recognize their strengths, we not only tell
them, we believe in you, but why we believe in you, and you know in
my, my years in alternative education, I cannot tell you the number of
times I would set an expectation or my staff
00:27:54.000 --> 00:28:06.000
would say to a kid you're going to accomplish this and let's work on
this and they would say, No, I can't do it. I've tried a failed I've
been there. I've done that you don't understand T.
00:28:06.000 --> 00:28:17.000
I can't, you don't get it, I can't. And I would say to them or my
staff would say to them, you know what, you might not believe yet, but
we believe in you.
00:28:17.000 --> 00:28:23.000
So grab onto our belief belief for now, you can use ours, until you
get there too.
00:28:23.000 --> 00:28:44.000
You know, and they do they eventually do I, I can't drive Five, four
minutes to tell a quick story that connects this, we all appreciate
something that illustrates a concept, go shelf, so I with one of my
first group of students in this alternative education
00:28:44.000 --> 00:29:05.000
school, I really believed in service as a, as a way in which students
and adults find purpose to give back to others. And we created in our
community, a memorial mural there was a certain amount of time in our
community where a 25 young people from the
00:29:05.000 --> 00:29:12.000
ages of 11 to 25 had passed away in a very short period of time just a
few years.
00:29:12.000 --> 00:29:23.000
And many of these young people were friends or family members of my
students my students knew them. And so we created a memorial mural.
00:29:23.000 --> 00:29:40.000
This was back. Gosh, I want to say 2009 and it served the community
people visited all the time. We had symbols on the mural that
represented the various students that, you know, we wanted to remember
symbols so that other people could find peace and
00:29:40.000 --> 00:29:51.000
solace when they visited the mural and maybe identify with a butterfly
or dirt bike or whatever was on the mural. Well, we had to move the
mural.
00:29:51.000 --> 00:30:01.000
There was renovations, where we had it placed in our community and it
had to be moved. And I'm since retired but this is a heart service
project to me.
00:30:01.000 --> 00:30:13.000
And so I've been part of the new group of students who are moving it,
and I was out at the site and kind of along one of the main streets in
our community.
00:30:13.000 --> 00:30:26.000
And we're getting the mural back up and come walking, you know from
behind, is a big Hispanic kid that says, hey, t.
00:30:26.000 --> 00:30:39.000
He's almost 30 years old he was one of the students that contributed
to this project when he was in high school, and I said what do you do
in any said.
00:30:39.000 --> 00:30:44.000
Looks like you might need some help. We're family. Right.
00:30:44.000 --> 00:31:06.000
And this kid who at the time struggled with reading really struggled
graduating from high school. He has found purpose. She is responsible
now, for he got donated landscaping artifacts in fact after our time
together today I'm going to meet him, and I'm
00:31:06.000 --> 00:31:23.000
number of other adult human beings who are going to gather because
they came to believe they had something to give. In doing so, they
achieved academically, the majority of them were able to graduate with
a regular diploma, but they're also out in the
00:31:23.000 --> 00:31:37.000
world today doing good things, you know, it makes a difference. And
we've got to believe in ourselves, I just want to end on that this
unprecedented time of coven.
00:31:37.000 --> 00:31:49.000
We've all been challenged with experiences that we've never been
through before that's what unprecedented means we forget that we've
used the term so much it's lost its meaning.
00:31:49.000 --> 00:32:08.000
When we've never experienced something, then when we tackle it.
Sometimes we fail, believing in ourselves says it's okay to fail.
Let's give ourselves some grace, and then figure out a new way to
approach something, maybe using not only our colleagues,
00:32:08.000 --> 00:32:17.000
but our students and helping us problem solve, so that we can all find
success together.
00:32:17.000 --> 00:32:19.000
Yeah.
00:32:19.000 --> 00:32:33.000
Thank you for sharing that story we need a nice reminder, even as we
think about our students today and the moments that we get to spend
with them at this time in their life, they are still becoming and.
00:32:33.000 --> 00:32:46.000
And what we what we plan to now we will we will we will reap later.
Yes. Yes. Are we Wendy I always told my kids I'm trying every day to
improve myself to, you know, I'm trying to.
00:32:46.000 --> 00:33:04.000
So, and that the educators that are participating in that the chat,
I'm sure will it, identify with this. People often would ask me, How
do you know what you're doing works with your kids, you know, and I
would say, asked me in five years, you know as
00:33:04.000 --> 00:33:08.000
fan 10 years because you see it.
00:33:08.000 --> 00:33:20.000
I don't want to leave this seven keys without emphasizing their
purposefulness, and I think you were intentional and talking to us
about how these first four work together.
00:33:20.000 --> 00:33:27.000
What would you like for us to pin down as a takeaway from this message
Keely or Michelle you've both explored.
00:33:27.000 --> 00:33:39.000
He, you go ahead and tackle it first because I think as you read there
was a. There were a couple things that resonated with you what would
just be one beyond.
00:33:39.000 --> 00:33:55.000
For me, it's really and I know we've all we've all heard about this,
it's the idea of active listening and really being intentional I know
we've already said that but that whole idea of being an active
listener suspending judgment focused really focusing
00:33:55.000 --> 00:34:11.000
on whoever is speaking to you, whoever you're having a conversation
with, try to minimize disruptions whether it be technology disruptions
or, or what other other kinds of interruptions you know just really
work hard to be present in that moment, as you're
00:34:11.000 --> 00:34:19.000
working through these for these four pieces. And then the other thing
to do is really give people wait time.
00:34:19.000 --> 00:34:33.000
When you ask them a question, instead of just asking and then moving
on to the next thing. Not everybody processes at the same speed, you
know, and some of the students that we worked with in the past, it
really does take them a lot longer to process
00:34:33.000 --> 00:34:43.000
even the question before they can then process an answer and verbalize
it. And so I think the wait time is really important when you're when
you're face to face.
00:34:43.000 --> 00:34:58.000
And then, even more so when you're online or, you know, in a, in a
virtual space and in a zoom meeting or whatever it might be, that
really you have to give that way time, and a strategy I use this I'll
tell my team all the time.
00:34:58.000 --> 00:35:10.000
I'm practicing my wait time, and then they know that like, I'm
expecting you know that we're having this this moment of connection,
and then I'm waiting for you to give me some information then we're
going to go back and forth with this but the idea of
00:35:10.000 --> 00:35:25.000
giving people wait time is just important because we all process
things at a different speed. And so I think that's about really seeing
each person as an individual and and providing that offer opportunity
for everybody to be heard.
00:35:25.000 --> 00:35:39.000
Yeah, and maybe giving various ways for people to be heard as well
you're talking about a virtual classroom. I love giving an opportunity
for everyone to share in the chat and then be able to share verbally
as you feel comfortable, that's you know that's
00:35:39.000 --> 00:35:42.000
something that can be done.
00:35:42.000 --> 00:36:01.000
One thing that I would add to that Wendy maybe is depending upon your
personality but educators in general, tend to go a million miles an
hour and do 15 different things at the same time and you know i i tell
a little story in the book about my husband
00:36:01.000 --> 00:36:22.000
saying to me at one point, I can't even remember exactly what I was
focused on but it was definitely more than one thing and he could see
the, the frantic parts of my physical manifestation so I'm sure and he
said, Hey, you got to close your tabs, as
00:36:22.000 --> 00:36:29.000
well. What, what, what, and I was like defensive and what are you
telling me and I didn't even know what he meant what are you telling
me close my dad.
00:36:29.000 --> 00:36:43.000
I even know what he meant he said you know what you remind me of is
your computer, you have 25 tabs open you be bought from one to the
next without ever shut anything down.
00:36:43.000 --> 00:37:04.000
And it was like an epiphany. I was like you. You were right i mean he
was right but he really was right, it, you have to shut some things
down and we talked a lot about intentionality sometimes to be
intentional, to be connected intentionally have to
00:37:04.000 --> 00:37:13.000
be still. And that's really difficult for educators to do, but to slow
down and be still.
00:37:13.000 --> 00:37:25.000
Even when you feel like you don't have time to do so because you'll
find that you get the time back, you slow down enough to build
relationships as a, as a classroom teacher.
00:37:25.000 --> 00:37:39.000
Some of those behavior issues you were dealing with before kids not
showing up in a virtually setting virtual setting, you're going to
find that there are more connected in class, they're more engaged in
class and they might show up or turn on that camera
00:37:39.000 --> 00:37:44.000
if they haven't been because they know that you care.
00:37:44.000 --> 00:38:00.000
So I glommed on to that tabs being open because we don't get our team
that we can look at somebody's screen and there's 35 tabs open yeah we
all know that in our brains i mean it's it's crazy the number of
things we're thinking about at one time and,
00:38:00.000 --> 00:38:12.000
and that is one of the response questions in the course is what tabs
Do you have open that you maybe need to close and how, how does having
too many tabs open impact you.
00:38:12.000 --> 00:38:24.000
Your students, your family, your circle. And so, it's again about
intentionality but it was definitely one of the things I grabbed on to
from the text I was like, I have too many tabs open.
00:38:24.000 --> 00:38:43.000
And I know that that impacts other people, it just, it just you're not
you're not able to be present when you, when you have things going on.
I'm wondering if that resonates with any of our attendees and if
you're a tab open person, give us a thumbs up.
00:38:43.000 --> 00:38:48.000
274 open right now.
00:38:48.000 --> 00:39:02.000
Oh my gosh, I opal says that her grandmother used to say, you have to
have stopping sense. Oh nice, I like that I'd like to hear it in a
grandma's voice too because I'm sure there was wisdom that you can
either audible wisdom in it.
00:39:02.000 --> 00:39:14.000
yeah I know when to stop here that analogy sometimes we keep adding
plays to the playbook but we never take anything out like that feeling
of always being asked to do more but you never get to let go of
anything.
00:39:14.000 --> 00:39:31.000
Maybe we can decide right here and now as a community of educators
that we will positively recognize those moments and those gestures
when colleagues are saying you know I need to stop and instead of
whatever a regular muscle memory responds maybe maybe
00:39:31.000 --> 00:39:51.000
we can push ourselves a good. I'm glad and you know what, I will too.
And and allow that balance to be part of how we provide care for one
another. Yes, without a doubt, and sometimes he intentionally tension
ality in that some of us I know my brain needs
00:39:51.000 --> 00:40:03.000
to have those prompts. So if this is something that you're, you're
listening to and you're thinking, gosh, the sounds good, but you know
the reality is my world doesn't work that way.
00:40:03.000 --> 00:40:06.000
Say yourself three times a day.
00:40:06.000 --> 00:40:13.000
Right. And when that timer goes off, Take one intentional breath in
through your nose.
00:40:13.000 --> 00:40:26.000
Hold it out through your mouth. That's, that's a starting place that's
dipping your toe in to say, I'm going to be more intentional, I don't
know which tab I'm going to close.
00:40:26.000 --> 00:40:38.000
I don't know if I'm going to be able to really practice all seven keys
to connection, but that's one intentional thing I'm going to start
with for me, so that I can be more connected with you.
00:40:38.000 --> 00:40:47.000
We're going to have to schedule an intervention for Lorraine, who was
commenting that we can actually make folders of open tabs. No.
00:40:47.000 --> 00:40:55.000
No problem. No, that's feeding the wrong beast.
00:40:55.000 --> 00:40:57.000
So funny.
00:40:57.000 --> 00:41:10.000
Michelle you had a beautiful quote in your text and I think Keeley
maybe you, you may have selected this one, let me bring it up on the
screen and share and let's talk about being conscientious about our
smile let me offer this one to the group here.
00:41:10.000 --> 00:41:16.000
Look at this niceness. Let's hear it in your voice Michelle.
00:41:16.000 --> 00:41:30.000
If you are conscientious about your smile, it will start in your heart
and shine through your eyes. Not only will you feel the difference,
but so will the person on the receiving end of your smile.
00:41:30.000 --> 00:41:45.000
And I believe that with all of my heart, and like I said I do believe
it's grounded in brain science, Sean acre has an amazing book called
The happiness advantage, and he talks about this a lot and you know we
can do.
00:41:45.000 --> 00:41:58.000
And don't get me wrong, there are many moments over this last year and
a half, that you may feel like you've got nothing to smile about so
I'm not asking you to smile in a way that is false.
00:41:58.000 --> 00:42:01.000
But all of us have something in our life.
00:42:01.000 --> 00:42:21.000
That causes us to feel joy or love that we can reflect upon or, you
know, set our eyes on I'm in my office and I've got pictures of my
family around me, set our eyes on something to feel that joy or think
about something that causes that joy so that when
00:42:21.000 --> 00:42:41.000
we smile, it is authentic. And there's this activity that Sean acre
talks about his in his book and I've done it with hundreds of people
at conferences where you you stand about three to four I'm going to
say six or more in our coven area, era, feet apart,
00:42:41.000 --> 00:42:43.000
and one person.
00:42:43.000 --> 00:42:49.000
You both look down at your feet and when the facilitator Cisco.
00:42:49.000 --> 00:43:09.000
The a row, their job is to show no effect on their face, that is the
expectation. The other row the B row. Their job is to smile from their
heart to think about that thing that causes joy, smile from their
heart so that it comes through their eyes, and
00:43:09.000 --> 00:43:21.000
without a doubt. When you say go 98% of the people that were asked to
show no effect. Can't help but smile.
00:43:21.000 --> 00:43:31.000
And those who don't we talk about a process and afterwards, those that
don't smile, they really wanted to but they just are so darn
competitive they weren't going to let it happen.
00:43:31.000 --> 00:43:34.000
I know.
00:43:34.000 --> 00:43:37.000
Yeah, Yeah, it's really nice.
00:43:37.000 --> 00:43:52.000
And we've talked a little bit about verbally expressing when you're
smiling and offering the kinds of interaction that reflect our
feelings, Kelly. Is this making you think of any particular
assignments in your course I think that they're referred to
00:43:52.000 --> 00:44:05.000
as applications because you're always applying the knowledge and the
learners edge course but are you thinking about any assignments or
applications. So because this is part of the seven keys to connection
that's my authentically it is, it's embedded
00:44:05.000 --> 00:44:19.000
within that assignment, but I did have some other thoughts about it.
Just because I you know I think it sets the tone for the day, right,
for yourself when you get up and there's your post it and you smile.
00:44:19.000 --> 00:44:34.000
And then when you even go into your classroom and you're greet your
kids at the door. And there they know if you're being authentic, about
your smile or your greeting with them and so you know for me it's just
really about kind of thinking about how can
00:44:34.000 --> 00:44:37.000
I smile a little bit more every day.
00:44:37.000 --> 00:44:50.000
You know, even if that's just thinking about, you know, whether it be
a flower that's popping up in the garden or, you know, my kids, or the
fact that it's sunny out in Minnesota, which is a rarity.
00:44:50.000 --> 00:45:06.000
You know, so I just started to think about things that bring me little
pieces of joy, and then I try to share that with, with the other
people that I'm interacting with, you know, students or colleagues, so
that they can just also figure out oh, you know,
00:45:06.000 --> 00:45:10.000
maybe I need to also connect and smile a little bit more.
00:45:10.000 --> 00:45:16.000
And instead of maybe saying, Why are you smiling or wire, you know,
why are you always looking for down.
00:45:16.000 --> 00:45:25.000
Maybe just give them some ideas of ways to focus on positive things or
be more grateful for things in their life.
00:45:25.000 --> 00:45:44.000
You know it's easier to focus on positive emotions than it is to focus
on negative emotions, but it is important to recognize our emotions
regardless, and know that they aren't good or bad, their emotions they
just are, but recognizing joy recognizing
00:45:44.000 --> 00:46:00.000
emotions associated with love. Those are easier for some people to
grab on to so it is a good place to start to then lead people to be
able to recognize other emotions because when your shoulders are like
this and your fists or like this, and your body
00:46:00.000 --> 00:46:16.000
saying, I'm frustrated or I'm angry or I'm confused or I'm scared. But
you don't articulate it. That can lead you down a path where then, it
hurts relationships or, it helps you to be less productive.
00:46:16.000 --> 00:46:29.000
And so, smiling focusing on joy, those are ways to step into that
whole idea of how do we recognize our emotions or feelings or our
moods because they're all different.
00:46:29.000 --> 00:46:32.000
But they're all important.
00:46:32.000 --> 00:46:49.000
Charlotte made it mentioned in the chat about body language seems to
be a topic people only focus on in job interviews, but certainly is a
topic for us to be aware of how we present ourselves and how we
encourage others to present themselves and creating
00:46:49.000 --> 00:47:02.000
a space where Sal is more and more present on our minds we allow
ourselves to be more conscious about our behaviors and our
interactions.
00:47:02.000 --> 00:47:12.000
Kelly, I like to invite you to talk a little bit more about your
course. And then I watch the time sneak up on us. Yeah.
00:47:12.000 --> 00:47:24.000
So, um, as indicated before I did use Michelle's book start with heart
to create is the primary resource in the course, its course number 52
or three.
00:47:24.000 --> 00:47:45.000
It is a CL starts with you, social and emotional learning starts with
you because there has over the past few years, been a major focus on
SEO for students and for kids, but really research is now saying,
Well, it's important that adults, understand where
00:47:45.000 --> 00:47:58.000
they are, with SEO and what their competencies are in relation to even
castles five different competencies right and so Michelle's last
chapter in her book is about SEO adult SEO.
00:47:58.000 --> 00:48:16.000
And so I tried to incorporate in the course, a number of opportunities
for the practitioner to really look intrinsically and reflect on where
I am I with this competency social awareness or or, you know,
relationship skills, and then actually apply content
00:48:16.000 --> 00:48:31.000
from Michelle's book, and from some other resources that we've
gathered for the course, apply that in their role, and so they can a
see where they are on the competency and then be work a little bit to
improve it, even if it's just a tiny little jump
00:48:31.000 --> 00:48:49.000
or boost, and then the more that the adult knows about SEO and
recognizes where they are themselves, the easier it will be for them
to understand SEO as a way of being, and then also use those
strategies and those skills modeling them explaining them.
00:48:49.000 --> 00:49:07.000
Thinking Out Loud about them in front of the students so that they
start to really grasp the idea of SEO. So the course is have three
credit graduate level continuing ed course, it's approximately 45
hours of work, lots of opportunities for reflection,
00:49:07.000 --> 00:49:11.000
many opportunities to apply learning to your role.
00:49:11.000 --> 00:49:22.000
And so we're, we're just really excited about the course especially
with a focus on CL starting with you as the adult.
00:49:22.000 --> 00:49:30.000
Michelle, what would you like to see happen as a result of this book
in this course. Oh so much.
00:49:30.000 --> 00:49:49.000
You know, it really comes down for me to educators, understanding, and
then being able to practice and model, social emotional learning
skills which I would consider to be social, emotional well being to
nurture their own, because we cannot integrate
00:49:49.000 --> 00:50:04.000
it into school culture, nor can we explicitly teach it to our
students. If we don't understand it practice and model it ourselves
and, you know, when I, when I wrote this book and chose the title and
I do have to say in this slide it is start with the
00:50:04.000 --> 00:50:05.000
heart.
00:50:05.000 --> 00:50:22.000
Start with the heart, it really, that's what it's about. For me it's
looking, looking at the inside. It's really trying to see people for
who they are as human beings, We often talk about seeing the story
behind the student.
00:50:22.000 --> 00:50:39.000
So I really want educators to have an opportunity to experience the
value that can be found in focusing on social emotional learning, and
I'm so grateful that Kelly is the one that created it because she
values, starting with the adults.
00:50:39.000 --> 00:50:47.000
And that really is. There's no other way to do it. If we just teach it
without understanding it are practicing in ourselves.
00:50:47.000 --> 00:51:00.000
It will not be as authentic so that's perfect. I'm going to invite us
to to close with an invitation to all our guests who have joined all
the attendees.
00:51:00.000 --> 00:51:13.000
If there is a takeaway that you are bringing with you from this
conversation if you are inspired in some way. Please will you offer it
into the chat, there may be some things that we can continue to offer
to one another.
00:51:13.000 --> 00:51:23.000
So we'll take one more moment with the chat open to allow a capture of
a little bit more exchange of great ideas, there were specific
examples that were recommendations.
00:51:23.000 --> 00:51:40.000
There was support and appreciation for this topic that matters more
than anything. Content Area knowledge will come but the space has to
be right and the the individual needs to be ready and open for, for
all of the learning that comes afterwards, Michelle
00:51:40.000 --> 00:51:57.000
Trujillo thank you for being here Keely Keller thank you for being
here I'm grateful to both of you for leading a lovely discussion. And
a reminder that we have a similar topic, focused a little bit more for
school administrators so if this topic has
00:51:57.000 --> 00:52:27.000
meaning to you personally as a teacher, and you'd like to see it at
the next level in your program, please invite your school
administrators or other school leaders or colleagues Everyone is
welcome to the conversation, please do join us in June, will