1. Mothers are too strict and need to listen to their children.
Mothers always want the best for their children. In this pursuit, they often impose values
and practices that the children might find conflicting with the contextual dynamics. In addition, if
mothers are too strict, children might find themselves in mentally scarring situations. This
argumentative essay focuses on justifying the statement "Mothers are too strict and need to listen
to their children", drawing references from three specific pieces of literature namely 'Double face'
(Amy Tan), 'Fish cheeks' (Amy Tan), and 'My mother, the Crazy African' (Chimamanda Ngozi
Adichie). The essay will first provide evidence from the mentioned literature and then present a
counter-claim to justify the arguments further.
In the short story, 'My mother, the Crazy African', the protagonist states, "I still say I am
from Philadelphia when Mother is not there" and "I call myself Lin when Mother isn't there."
These statements refer to the fact that the values and practices imposed by the protagonist's Mother
are somewhat unacceptable. The Mother (originally from Nigeria), who is very proud of her roots
and culture, wants her daughter to nurture the same values. The Mother wants her daughter to own
her ancestral culture and abide by the associated norms even after living under completely different
societal circumstances in America. The daughter finds herself conflicted and decides to construct
a convenient identity, which could help her blend in, by overcoming the obvious accentual
inhibitions. Moreover, the protagonist's Mother often behaves rudely in front of American guests,
which makes the protagonist's pursuit of blending in that much harder. Even the punishments that
the Mother executes are too extreme in regards to the contemporary context. Under such
circumstances, the protagonist finds herself confined to a set of rules that prevents her from
exploring herself. These restrictions might have worked well in Nigeria, but having moved to
America, these are deemed unnecessary and inhibiting.
In 'Fish Cheeks', the fourteen-year-old girl, who desperately seeks approval from the person
she admires, feels embarrassed because of the cultural differences. The protagonist wants her
American 'crush' to like her, but the eccentric Chinese traditions obstruct her from reaching that
goal. The Mother could have aided in this pursuit by conforming to American customs and
manners but decided to stick to Chinese ones, which at that moment were unacceptable to the
daughter. The girl felt mortified to the point that she wished to have disappeared.
In 'Double Face,' the daughter finds it fashionable to be Chinese. The Mother's lifelong
pursuit of incorporating Chinese values were overwhelmed by the American Attitude. And now
the daughter feels alienated by her own people because she doesn't carry the expected qualities.
On the other hand, in 'Fish cheeks' even though it was embarrassing for the daughter when her
Mother served Chinese dishes to American guests, the main purpose of such a menu was to provide
the favorite dishes for the daughter. These indicate that even though the mothers' actions might
seem to inhibit, for the time being, they are usually directed towards the greater good. However,
every individual should be allowed to make their own choices. Imposing values and norms and
dictating choices are likely to create resentment in children's minds for their parents. This is
because everybody has the urge to be independent, explore their preferences, and make their own
choices. If anybody is forced to make a choice, then the outcomes are likely to do more harm than
good.
Being a strict parent is not ideal because it often strips individuals of their free will and
independence. The notion behind being strict is understandable, but strictness should not
undermine children's mental health and the friendly relationship between parents and their
offspring. Usually, children trust their mothers the most. To facilitate and build this trust, mothers
should be mindful of the effects that their decisions have on their children. Suppose mothers'
decisions are counterproductive, embarrassing, and inhibiting; along with mental trauma, the
children might grow up to be resentful, making them more disruptive, going against all the notions
of strictness. However, if mothers can establish an understanding, there will be no need for
strictness. The children could easily get on board with the decisions if the logic and the notion
could be effectively communicated to them.