Practice Essay Task - Poetry ABOUT YOUR EXAM You will be required to select ONE poem or song from a range of texts which you have not analysed or discussed in class. You will choose this poem/song from a collection of 4 poems (one related to each theme/topic in the anthology – love, war, death and social issues) and 2 songs (related to two of the themes/topics in the anthology). You will have 15 minutes of perusal time, during which you may use highlighters on the task sheet and selected poem/song. It is recommended that you develop a “colourcode” for highlighting and use your perusal time wisely. The length of the essay should be 500 words, not counting quotations or line references. You will have 90 minutes of working time, during which you may access a dictionary, thesaurus and/or first language dictionary (provided these texts are not electronic) You will not have sufficient time to write a draft in the examination; it is recommended that you write a detailed plan (you may wish to use a table to plan, as shown in Modules 2.2 and 2.3) and then write your essay in your examination booklet. If you have planned effectively, you should not need to make major revisions to your essay. Try to leave sufficient time at the end of the examination to edit and proofread your essay. The examination task will be very similar to the following practice essay task. It is recommended that you complete as many practice essays as possible (each essay should analyse ONE poem or song from the anthology studied this term). When writing a practice essay, try to replicate the conditions of the Term 4 examination: Allow 15 minutes for reading the poem/song and using highlighters on this text Allow about 10 minutes to thoroughly plan the essay Allow about 70 minutes to write the essay Allow about 10 minutes to revise, edit and proofread the essay PRACTICE ESSAY TASK Write an analytical exposition to deconstruct ONE poem or song, in response to ONE of the options below: Option 1 How does the poet promote particular ideas, attitudes and values through utilising aesthetic features and constructing representations? Option 2 How does the poet utilise aesthetic features and promote particular ideas, attitudes and values to represent a theme or topic in a particular way? Note: When writing a practice essay you can analyse any poem or song in the Term 4 Anthology. Analysing a Poem or Song Lyrics Both context and text are important when analysing a poem or song lyrics; they work together to engage an audience and promote a particular perspective. The context of a text can often provide additional insight into the ideas, attitudes and values of a poet or lyricist/performer. This information can also reveal why a poet or lyricist/performer may have represented a theme or topic in a particular way. The context is anything beyond the poem or song that may contribute to its meaning. This could include: Biographical information about the poet or lyricist/performer Cultural information about the religion, values and language choices of the poet or lyricist/performer Historical and political information about the time when the poem or song was composed Other information such as the intended purpose and audience of the poem or song (as evidenced by information from letters, interviews or other non-fiction sources) The decisions the poet or lyricist/performer makes about form and use of poetic devices shape the text of the poem or song. They reveal the perspective of the poet or lyricist/performer by representing the theme or topic in a particular way and promoting specific ideas, attitudes and values. Activities Each time you respond to a poem or song lyrics, complete the following activities: 1. Spend five minutes using Google to research the context of the poem/song. Note down anything you believe may have influenced the way the theme or topic has been represented by the poet or lyricist/performer. 2. Who or what is represented in the poem/song? Examples: War Love People in love Indigenous Australians 3. Write bullet points to outline key representations in the poem/song. Examples: Death is represented as something which should not be feared Grief is represented as a devastating emotion There is a negative representation of non-Indigenous Australians because it is suggested they don’t respect the culture or rights of Indigenous Australians 4. Write bullet points to identify ideas which are promoted in the poem (what the poet or lyricist/performer believes about the theme or topic). Examples: People in love experience extreme highs and extreme lows of emotion People should not fear death War is wrong because it leads to the death of many soldiers 5. Write bullet points to sum up the overall attitude of the poet or lyricist/performer in relation to aspects of the theme or topic. Examples: The poet has a critical attitude towards people in love because he thinks they are foolish The lyricist has a positive attitude towards soldiers because she believes they are bravely defending their nation The poet has a sympathetic attitude towards people who are mourning because he believes they are emotionally devastated by the loss of a loved one 6. Write bullet points to identify the values promoted in the poem or song (what the poet or lyricist/performer thinks is very important and/or should be prioritised). If there is something the poet or lyricist/performer clearly does NOT value, identify this too. Examples: The poet values nature and Indigenous Australian culture The poet values honesty but does not value love, which he perceives as an illusion 7. Explain how the poet has influenced the audience through employment of the following aesthetic features: (a) Choice of poetic form (b) Use of sound devices (refer to the effects of specific poetic devices) (c) Use of imagery (refer to the effects of specific poetic devices) (d) Other poetic devices (refer to the effects of specific poetic devices) Quotations and Vocabulary NOTES All quotations on this document are from W. H. Auden’s poem Stop All the Clocks, Cut Off the Telephone (Auden, 1996) Quote = a verb, “to state the words of others”. Example: it is important to quote lines from Auden’s poem. Quotation = a noun, “the words of others” Example: This is evident in the quotation, “Let aeroplanes circle moaning overhead” (line 5). Abbreviations must never be used in formal academic writing (such as essays). Therefore “quote” must never be used as an abbreviation of “quotation”. USING QUOTATIONS When using quotations in an essay, it is important to keep in mind that: Quotations are “someone else’s words” therefore they are not counted in word length A quotation cannot “make” your point for you. You need to write at least one sentence to explain the significance of the quotation (how it is relevant to the point in a paragraph and/or the essay’s controlling idea). It is not always necessary to use a quotation to support a statement. Sometimes it is more effective to use your own words to sum up aspects of a poem or song which construct a representation or express ideas, attitudes and values (refer to examples in Modules 2.4, 2.5 and 3.1). A quotation should be compiled of those words and phrases which best support a statement. It is not always necessary to quote entire lines. When using a quotation to identify an aesthetic feature, it is necessary to show that you truly understand the aesthetic feature. This can be achieved by embedding the quotation in a sentence and/or using underlining. o Example 1: Alliteration of the “n” sound is evident in the words “nothing now” (line 16). o Example 2: Personification of an aeroplane is evident in the way it is described as “moaning” (line 5) and “scribbling” (line 6) Basic guidelines for using quotations are: Do not use quotations that are longer than two lines in length Use ... to delete words which are not needed to make your point o Example: “He was… my noon, my midnight, my talk, my song” (lines 9-11) Use [ ] to add letters or words to ensure quotations “fit” in the context of your essay and are easy for the reader to understand. Essay readers know that letters and words between [ ] are those of the writer of the essay. o Example 1: The idea that the poet’s grief prevents him from appreciating nature’s beauty is conveyed in his desire to “put out every one [of the stars]” (line 13). o Example 2: Grief is represented as so overwhelming that it makes the sufferer wish to destroy anything of beauty. By “pour[ing] away the ocean” (line 15) and “sweep[ing] up the wood” (line 15), sufferers of grief reject anything that could make them find peace or beauty. This representation conveys the destructive nature of grief. Use quotations marks to format quotations (“ “) Acknowledge all quotations with line numbers Embed quotations within sentences and paragraphs ANALYSE important elements of quotations – how and why do they prove the point you are trying to prove in a paragraph (connected to the controlling idea of the essay)? USEFUL WORDS AND PHRASES: Vocabulary related to analysis of a text (colour coding is used to group words and phrases that have similar meanings): represents, representation, is represented when, is represented by constructs, is constructed by, the construction of shapes, is shaped by invites, is invited when, is invited in the way, thus invites, hence invites influences, influencing, the audience is influenced to believe, the audience is influenced to accept, the audience is influenced to perceive positions, positioning, is positioned to accept aesthetic features - imagery (simile, metaphor, personification, symbolism, hyperbole), sound devices (rhyme, rhythm, alliteration, assonance, onomatopoeia), other poetic devices (repetition, irony, oxymoron, paradox, pun) promotes the idea that, conveys the idea that, reflects the idea that, reveals the poet’s idea that suggests that the poet believes, implies that the poet believes, reflects the poet’s perspective that, promotes the poet’s perspective of reflects a negative attitude about, implies the poet has a sympathetic attitude towards, reflects the poet’s positive attitude regarding, suggests that the poet has a critical attitude towards, conveys the poet’s judgemental attitude regarding reflects the poet’s values, indicates that the poet values, conveys the way the poet values, promote the value of promotes the importance of, shows that the poet places importance on, conveys the way [insert something specific] is considered to be important General analytical vocabulary includes: is evidenced when, is evidenced by, exemplifies, as exemplified when, as exemplified in the way illustrates, displays, depicts, is depicted as, is depicted by, presents, conveys emphasises, highlights, establishes, further develops, signals, promotes suggests, implies, reveals reflects, mirrors, is consistent with opposes, challenges, contrasts with Cohesive ties to link “lists”: in addition also another further, furthermore moreover Cohesive ties to link points regarding comparisons (similarities and differences): Similarities – similarly, alike Differences – however, in contrast, unlike, on the other hand, while, despite this Additional cohesive ties: Initially Later in the poem Consequently As a result Subsequently ACTIVITY Write an analytical exposition about the way W.H. Auden represents grief in his poem Stop All the Clocks, Cut Off the Telephone. Ensure you use all the guidelines provided in Modules 2.2, 2.4, 3.1 and 3.2. Bibliography Auden, W. H. (1996). Stop All the Clocks, Cut Off the Telephone. In P. McFarlane, & L. Temple (Eds.), Blue Light, Clear Atoms (p. 174). South Yarra: Macmillan Education Australia Pty Ltd. Analytical Exposition Genre DEFINITION AND PURPOSE An analytical exposition is an extended text that develops and proves the writer’s thesis (controlling idea), supported by formal analysis of a particular text. Analytical expositions are more commonly called “essays”. The purpose of an analytical exposition is to convince readers of the validity of the analysis presented and thereby prove the writer’s thesis (controlling idea). OVERALL STRUCTURE The structure of an analytical exposition is as follows: Introduction – one paragraph Body – three or four paragraphs Conclusion – one paragraph Introduction: The purpose of an introduction is to give readers an overview of the essay, making them aware of what the writer will analyse/prove. No analysis of a text should be included in the introduction; all analysis belongs in body paragraphs. Features of a well-written introduction are: Title and “author” (in this case a poet) Relevant contextual information (1-2 sentences that can be connected to the controlling idea) Echo of task question/statement (use of key words in the task question) Thesis (controlling idea which relates to the task question/statement) Preview of body paragraphs Example: Task Question: How does Carol Ann Duffy promote ideas, attitudes and values about love in her poem Valentine? Introduction: Carol Ann Duffy wrote Valentine after a radio producer asked her to write a poem to celebrate Valentine’s Day, the annual celebration of romantic love. However, instead of celebrating the romantic ideal of love, Duffy uses her free verse poem to promote ideas, attitudes and values about what she perceives to be the reality of love. This is evident through Duffy’s representation of the positive and negative “realities” of love. Duffy’s use of aesthetic features, especially imagery and sound devices, also convey her perspective about the nature of love. ACTIVITY Use coloured text highlighters to identify the different features of the introduction. Conclusion: The purpose of a conclusion is to remind readers of the main information presented in the essay to prove the thesis (controlling idea). No new information should be included in the conclusion, although the last sentence could leave readers with a “final thought” related to controlling idea or the overall quality/power of the text analysed. Features of a well-written conclusion are: Cohesive tie signalling the end of the essay eg “overall”, “in conclusion” or “it is evident that” Title and “author” (in this case a poet) Echo of task question/statement (expressed differently from words used in the introduction) Thesis (controlling idea which relates to the task question/statement, again avoid repeating a sentence already used in the essay) Summary of body paragraphs (three or four sentences) Optional – final thought (eg a comment about the overall quality or relevance of the text OR reflecting on the representations/ideas/attitudes/values promoted in the text) Example: Task Question: How does Carol Ann Duffy promote ideas, attitudes and values about love in her poem Valentine? Conclusion: There can be no doubt that Carol Ann Duffy has constructed Valentine to promote both positive and negative ideas, attitudes and values about love. She represents love as something that can be long lasting and bring happiness but also highlights the way love can cause pain and distress. Imagery is constructed through the use of metaphors and similes which convey Duffy’s ideas about the positive and negative aspects of love. Assonance and alliteration are other aesthetic features used in the poem; these sound devices are designed to draw attention to Duffy’s contrasting attitudes about the reality of love. Overall, Duffy’s poem influences the audience to question the idealised image of romantic love usually promoted on Valentine’s Day and become more realistic about the dual nature of love. ACTIVITY Use coloured text highlighters to identify the different features of the conclusion. Body Paragraphs: The purpose of body paragraphs is to develop (and establish the validity of) the controlling idea identified in the essay’s introduction. Each body paragraph should: Focus on a different point (argument) which is clearly identified in a topic sentence Prove the point through providing evidence, including relevant quotations which are explained and analysed Include cohesive ties which connect sentences in the paragraph Include a concluding sentence which sums up how the paragraph relates to the controlling idea and connects to the next body paragraph All paragraphs should have the components identified on the previous page. However, paragraphs can have slightly different structures. The following examples may be appropriate for your essay. STRUCTURE CONTENT EXAMPLE PEEL P – point (topic sentence) E – evidence E – explain L – link (concluding sentence) Duffy represents some positive aspects of love. This is evident in her reference to the way love “promises light” (lines 4-5) and can be “faithful” (line 15). By metaphorically comparing love to moonlight, Duffy constructs a romantic image of love, conveying the idea that love can bring happiness and romance. She also points out that love can be long lasting and therefore “faithful”. In these ways, Duffy promotes a positive attitude towards love but her poem also represents negative aspects of love. TS SQE x2 CS Topic sentence S – state the point Q – quotation or other evidence E – explain Repeat SQE to make a different (but related) point Concluding sentence Duffy represents love in a way that reflects her idea about its dual nature. On some lines the poem constructs love positively. For example, Duffy creates the image of lovers undressing by moonlight in a way that “promises light” (lines 4-5). This conveys her idea that love can be connected to a type of romantic tenderness which brings happiness. However, in many lines Duffy represents love negatively. This is particularly evident in stanza two, which emphasises the pain and “tears” (line 7) which can result from love. This representation promotes Duffy’s idea that love can cause despair and grief. Duffy’s contrasting representations of love, enhanced by imagery, are designed to influence the audience to accept that there are both positive and negative aspects of love. TS SQEQE CS Topic sentence S – state the point Q – quotation or other evidence E – explain Q – different quotation or evidence E – explain Concluding sentence Imagery is an aesthetic feature Duffy uses to influence her audience to accept her perspective of love. In particular, Duffy makes extensive use of metaphors to convey her ideas about love. One example is on lines 13-14: “I give you an onion. Its fierce kiss will stay on your lips”. This metaphor compares a possessive kiss between lovers with the way the smell and taste of an onion remains on a person’s skin. As people generally do not like the smell and lingering taste of an onion, the metaphor conveys Duffy’s idea that love can be long lasting but that its effects are not always positive. Another significant metaphor is contained within the simile “it will blind you with tears like a lover” (lines 7-8). The metaphor “blind you with tears” compares having vision forcibly removed with the way an onion can make someone unable to see because of tears caused by the onion’s biological composition. Within the bigger context of the simile “like a lover”, the metaphor therefore conveys Duffy’s negative attitude towards love. She is clearly trying to influence the audience to accept the idea that love can make someone “blind” to reality - such as the faults of a lover or a lover’s ability to cause pain. Imagery, along with sound devices, are definitely designed to encourage the audience to perceive Duffy ‘s idea of the “reality” of love. Planning Your Essay Topic and concluding sentences are vitally important in correctly structuring a paragraph and creating a cohesive essay. Topic sentences should identify the point of the paragraph. Concluding sentences should sum up how the paragraph relates to the controlling idea and connect to the next body paragraph. Once you have carefully planned topic and concluding sentences, it is much easier to draft an essay. Consider the example below: Task Question: How does Carol Ann Duffy promote ideas, attitudes and values about love in her poem Valentine? Essay Carol Ann Duffy wrote Valentine after a radio producer asked her to write a poem to celebrate Valentine’s Day, the annual celebration of romantic love. However, instead of celebrating the romantic ideal of love, Duffy uses her free verse poem to promote ideas, attitudes and values about what she perceives to be the reality of love. This is evident through Duffy’s representation of the positive and negative “realities” of love. Duffy’s use of aesthetic features, especially imagery and sound devices, also convey her perspective about the nature of love. Planning for Body Paragraphs Paragraph 1 – Representations (Positive) Topic Sentence Duffy represents some positive aspects of love. Concluding Sentence Although these aspects of the poem represent love positively, a negative representation is much more evident. Paragraph 2 – Representations (Negative) Topic Sentence Throughout her poem, Duffy influences the audience to perceive what she considers to be the harsh reality of love. Concluding Sentence This negative representation of love is enhanced by imagery, which Duffy employs throughout the poem to promote her ideas, attitudes and values. Paragraph 3 – Imagery Topic Sentence Metaphor and simile are the main poetic devices Duffy utilises to influence her audience through imagery. Concluding Sentence Imagery, in conjunction with sound devices, is designed to influence the audience to accept the idea that the reality of love involves pain as well as joy. Paragraph 4 – Sound Devices Topic Sentence Sound devices such as assonance and alliteration draw attention to lines which promote Duffy’s ideas and attitudes about the “reality” of love. Concluding Sentence Duffy’s expert use of assonance and alliteration definitely encourage the audience to accept her ideas about love. There can be no doubt that Carol Ann Duffy has constructed Valentine to promote both positive and negative ideas, attitudes and values about love. She represents love as something that can be long lasting and bring happiness but also highlights the way love can cause pain and distress. Imagery is constructed through the use of metaphors and similes which convey Duffy’s ideas about the positive and negative aspects of love. Assonance and alliteration are other aesthetic features used in the poem; these sound devices are designed to draw attention to Duffy’s contrasting attitudes about the reality of love. Overall, Duffy’s poem influences the audience to question the idealised image of romantic love usually promoted on Valentine’s Day and become more realistic about the dual nature of love. GUIDELINES When writing an analytical exposition, there are some general guidelines: DO ☑ Create a controlling idea that is directly related to a task question/statement ☑ Ensure all body paragraphs are designed to prove the controlling idea ☑ Sequence body paragraphs in the same order they were “previewed” in the introduction ☑ Provide quotations to support statements and analyse how those quotations prove the controlling idea ☑ Embed quotations in sentences and paragraphs (using connecting sentences and cohesive ties) ☑ Write a topic sentence for each body paragraph – clearly identifying the focus of the paragraph, without providing any analysis ☑ Write a concluding sentence for each body paragraph – summing up how the paragraph connects to the controlling idea and linking to the next body paragraph ☑ Use cohesive ties to link sentences within paragraphs ☑ Use present tense ☑ Underline the title of the poem or song (to correctly punctuate the title) ☑ Refer to the poet by his or her whole name OR surname (for example Jack Davis or Davis) ☑ Refer to the lyricists as well as the performer when analysing a song, as the lyricists are the ones responsible for constructing representations, using aesthetic features and promoting ideas, attitudes and values ☑ Maintain a formal, analytical and objective tone (do not use emotive or biased word choices) DO NOT ☒ Include unnecessary contextual information not related to the controlling idea ☒ Write so much about contextual information that you do not have time to include sufficient analysis of the poem or song (most of your 500 words should be spent analysing the selected text) ☒ Include analysis in the introduction (it belongs in body paragraphs) ☒ Include new details or evidence in the conclusion (it belongs in body paragraphs) ☒ Summarise subject matter or make general comments that do not relate to the task question/statement ☒ Include quotations or line numbers when “counting word length” ☒ Use informal language ☒ Use abbreviations ☒ Use personal pronouns (eg “you”, “we”, “our”, “my”) ☒ Refer to the poet by his or her first name (eg Jack) ☒ Use headings Scaffolded Analysis - Representations Complete the tables below to analyse any poem or song from the anthology provided. This document is designed to scaffold an essay with a controlling idea about representations. SUBJECT MATTER FOR THE ESSAY’S INTRODUCTION Title of Poem or Song Poet or Lyricist/Performer What poetic form has been used to represent the theme or topic? Who or what is most represented in the poem or song and will be the main focus of the essay? (What is the theme or topic?) (For example: love, death, war, women’s rights, people in love, mourners, nature, non-Indigenous Australians, Indigenous Australians, racism) Context of Poem or Song Identify any aspects of the context of the poem or song which may have influenced the way the poet/lyricist/performer represented the theme or topic, such as: Life experiences of the poet/lyricist/performer The religion or culture of the poet/lyricist/performer The time and place in which the poem or song was written Known information about the intended audience and purpose of the poem or song Controlling Idea (1 sentence which sums up how the theme or topic is represented in the poem or song, as evident in the following table) Continued next page… SUBJECT MATTER FOR THE BODY OF THE ESSAY Focus Area of Body Paragraph Ideas, Attitudes and Values Ideas: What does the poet/lyricist/performer believe about the theme or topic represented in the poem or song? Attitudes: Sum up the overall attitude of the poet/lyricist/performer in relation to aspects of the theme or topic represented in the poem or song? Values: What does the representation of the theme or topic reveal about the values of the poet/lyricist/performer? (What is perceived to be important? What is perceived to be unimportant?) Poetic Devices: Sound Devices How have two or more of the following sound devices been used to influence the audience about the theme or topic? Rhyme Rhythm Alliteration Assonance Onomatopoeia Note: It is only necessary to compose 2 body paragraphs about poetic devices. You should write about the two groups of poetic devices which most influence the audience to accept the representation in the selected poem or song. Continued next page… Analysis (A Focus Area of Body Paragraph Poetic Devices: Imagery How have two or more of the following poetic devices been used create imagery designed to influence the audience about the theme or topic? Simile Metaphor Personification Symbolism Hyperbole Note: It is only necessary to compose 2 body paragraphs about poetic devices. You should write about the two groups of poetic devices which most influence the audience to accept the representation in the selected poem or song. Other Poetic Devices: How have two or more of the following poetic devices been used to influence the audience about the theme or topic? Repetition Irony Oxymoron Paradox Pun Note: It is only necessary to compose 2 body paragraphs about poetic devices. You should write about the two groups of poetic devices which most influence the audience to accept the representation in the selected poem or song. Continued next page… Analysis (A SUBJECT MATTER FOR THE ESSAY’S CONCLUSION Title of Poem or Song Poet or Lyricist/Performer Write 1 sentence to comment on the overall representation of the theme or topic (eg positive, negative, critical, sympathetic, powerful) Restate the controlling idea, using slightly different wording from that used in the introduction Write 1 sentence to sum up body paragraph 1, reflecting on how the poet/lyricist/performer has represented the theme or topic to promote particular ideas, attitudes and values Write 1-2 sentences to sum up how a range of poetic devices have been used to influence the reader to accept the representation of the theme or topic (to sum up body paragraphs) 2.3 Scaffolded Analysis – Ideas, Attitudes and Values Complete the tables below to analyse any poem or song from the anthology provided. This document is designed to scaffold an essay with a controlling idea about ideas, attitudes and values. SUBJECT MATTER FOR THE ESSAY’S INTRODUCTION Title of Poem or Song Poet or Lyricist/Performer What poetic form has been used to promote the ideas, attitudes and values of the poet/lyricist/performer? What is the theme or topic about which the poet/lyricist/performer is conveying ideas, attitudes and values? (For example: love, death, war, women’s rights, people in love, mourners, nature, non-Indigenous Australians, Indigenous Australians, racism) Context of Poem or Song Identify any aspects of the context of the poem or song which may have influenced the poet’s perspective in relation to the theme or topic, such as: Life experiences of the poet/lyricist/performer which may have affected ideas, attitudes and values The religion or culture of the poet/lyricist/performer The time and place in which the poem or song was written Known information about the intended audience and purpose of the poem or song Controlling Idea (1 sentence which sums up the ideas, attitudes and values promoted about the theme or topic, as evident in the following table) Continued next page… SUBJECT MATTER FOR THE BODY OF THE ESSAY Focus Area of Body Paragraph Representations How does the poet/lyricist/performer represent people or places to influence the audience to accept particular ideas, attitudes and/or values? How does the poet represent events and/or concepts (such as war, love, death, justice, racism) to influence the audience to accept particular ideas, attitudes and/or values? Note: It may be necessary to write more than one paragraph, if there is more than one significant representation. Poetic Devices: Sound Devices How have two or more of the following sound devices been used to influence the audience to accept particular ideas, attitudes and values? Rhyme Rhythm Alliteration Assonance Onomatopoeia Note: It is only necessary to compose 2 body paragraphs about poetic devices. You should write about the two groups of poetic devices which most influence the audience by promoting particular ideas, attitudes and values in the selected poem or song. Continued next page… Analysis (A Focus Area of Body Paragraph Poetic Devices: Imagery How have two or more of the following poetic devices been used create imagery designed to influence the audience to accept particular ideas, attitudes and values? Simile Metaphor Personification Symbolism Hyperbole Note: It is only necessary to compose 2 body paragraphs about poetic devices. You should write about the two groups of poetic devices which most influence the audience by promoting particular ideas, attitudes and values in the selected poem or song. Other Poetic Devices: How have two or more of the following poetic devices been used to influence the audience to accept particular ideas, attitudes and values? Repetition Irony Oxymoron Paradox Pun Note: It is only necessary to compose 2 body paragraphs about poetic devices. You should write about the two groups of poetic devices which most influence the audience by promoting particular ideas, attitudes and values in the selected poem or song. Continued next page… Analysis (A SUBJECT MATTER FOR THE ESSAY’S CONCLUSION Title of Poem or Song Poet or Lyricist/Performer Write 1 sentence to comment on the overall perspective promoted in the poem or song, in relation to the theme or topic (eg positive, negative, critical, sympathetic, powerful) Restate the controlling idea, using slightly different wording from that used in the introduction Write 1-3 sentences to sum up the body paragraphs, reflecting on how the poet/lyricist/performer has promoted particular ideas, attitudes and values through: representations and poetic devices Student’s Name Feedback Sheet – Analytical Exposition (Essay) The purpose of this document is to provide feedback regarding the extent to which your practice analytical exposition fulfils known requirements of the upcoming examination. Teachers may also offer verbal feedback not recorded here. The essay produced in examination conditions must analyse an unseen poem or song, in response to an unseen question; the practice essay should not be viewed as a “draft”. Senior English criteria and standards are assessed across three dimensions: Dimension 1 – Understanding and Responding to Contexts Dimension 2 – Understanding and Controlling Textual Features Dimension 3 – Creating and Evaluating Meaning (in this task only ‘Evaluating Meaning’ will be assessed) Task Element The essay demonstrates knowledge and understanding of: The selected poem or song The way the poet or lyricist/performer has influenced an audience The introduction of the essay includes: The title of the poem or song (correctly punctuated) and poet or lyricist/performer The form of the poem/song Relevant information about the context of the poem/song (no longer than two sentences) One sentence stating the controlling idea (identifying the representation OR summing up the ideas, attitudes and values promoted) 1-2 sentences previewing the body paragraphs (identifying the focus of each body paragraph, in order) Dimension Feedback 1, 3 1 Good Satisfactory Needs improvement – limited (or only superficial) knowledge of the poem/song has been demonstrated Needs improvement – the essay summarises or reflects on aspects of subject matter (instead of analysing representations OR ideas/attitudes/values) Serious problem area Good Satisfactory Needs Improvement (refer to details below) Serious Problem (refer to details below) Specific Feedback: Could be developed with more depth and/or sophistication Contains irrelevant subject matter Too much detail is provided (some subject matter should be deleted or moved to the body of the essay) The controlling idea is unclear and/or not related to the task question Does not contain all required elements (refer to details identified in column 1) Revision of sentence structure, word choices and/or punctuation is required The body of the essay is comprised of 3 or 4 body paragraphs which develop the controlling idea in response to one task question: The ideas, attitudes and values promoted in the poem/song (ONLY if the selected question relates to representations) Representations in the poem/song (ONLY if the selected question relates to ideas, attitudes and values) The author’s use of at least two of the following categories of aesthetic features: - Imagery (simile, metaphor, personification, symbolism, hyperbole) - Sound devices (rhyme, rhythm, alliteration, assonance, onomatopoeia) - Other devices (repetition, irony, oxymoron, paradox, pun) Body paragraphs are effectively structured: Ideas are effectively grouped and sequenced There is only one main idea for each paragraph There is a topic sentence signalling the main idea (the critical literacy concept that will be analysed, connected to the controlling idea) Elaboration and supporting evidence are provided There is a concluding sentence connecting the content of the paragraph to the controlling idea and (if appropriate) linking to the next body paragraph 1, 3 Specific Feedback: Needs to demonstrate increased depth of insight into the poem/song (refer to details identified in column 1) Insufficient understanding of aesthetic features has been demonstrated Contains irrelevant subject matter Contains subject matter that is not clearly connected to the controlling idea Does not contain sufficient evidence The selected quotations do not effectively support statements The selected quotations are not sufficiently analysed The quotations are too long and need to be reduced (so the significant words are quoted and embedded in the analysis) At times there is a focus on summarising subject matter, instead of analysing the way the poem/song is designed to influence readers by constructing a specific representation or promoting particular ideas, attitudes and values Revision of sentence structure, word choices and/or punctuation is required 1, 2 1 Good Satisfactory Needs Improvement (refer to details below) Serious Problem (refer to details below) Specific Feedback: Contains irrelevant subject matter There is repetition or “overlapping” of content Sequencing of paragraphs requires revision Paragraphs contain more than one main idea Cohesive ties (linking) need refinement Topic sentences are missing or require revision Concluding sentences are missing or require revision There is insufficient or ineffective elaboration and supporting evidence The conclusion of the essay: Refers to the title and poet/lyricist/performer Re-states the controlling idea Sums up the main points of the essay – how the “body” paragraphs have “proved” the controlling idea (no more than 3 sentences) Optional – includes a “final thought” (related to the controlling idea; designed to influence readers of the essay by evoking thought about the selected poem/song or the poet/lyricist/performer) Good Satisfactory Needs Improvement (refer to details below) Serious Problem (refer to details below) Good Satisfactory Needs improvement – could be developed with more depth and/or sophistication Needs improvement – contains irrelevant subject matter or “new” subject matter not developed in the body of the essay Needs improvement – too much detail is provided (some subject matter should be moved to the body of the essay) Needs improvement – the controlling idea is unclear and/or not related to the task question Needs improvement – is too similar to the introduction and doesn’t “signal” the end of the essay Needs improvement – does not contain all required elements (refer to details identified in column 1) Needs improvement – revision of sentence structure, word choices and/or punctuation is required Serious problem area Control of textual features is evident in vocabulary choices: Formal academic word choices are employed throughout the essay A range of sophisticated vocabulary has been used to influence the reader to accept the controlling idea Terminology related to poetic devices is utilised correctly throughout the essay No abbreviations have been used There are no first person pronouns (eg “I”, “my”, “our”, “we”) 2 Specific Feedback: There is insufficient reference to specific poetic devices There are lapses in the use of formal academic language Words don’t always “fit” in the context of sentences Includes abbreviations Includes first person pronouns Sentences demonstrate control of textual features: There is effective use of a range of sentence structures Written expression is articulate and fluent Grammatical accuracy is sustained throughout the essay 2 2 There is sufficient length to meet task requirements 1, 3 Good Satisfactory Satisfactory but greater range and sophistication of sentence structures would enhance the essay Needs Improvement (refer to details below) Serious Problem (refer to details below) Specific Feedback: There are some run-on sentences that should be revised into separate sentences Some sentences are “fragmented” (incomplete) There are lapses in written expression (the way points are expressed) Errors in written expression make it difficult for readers to clearly understand points There are lapses in the use of pronouns (eg “he” and “it”) which lead to ambiguity There are lapses in grammar There is too much repetition of some sentence structures Includes abbreviations Includes first person pronouns There is accurate use of: Punctuation Spelling Good Satisfactory Satisfactory but you could enhance the quality of the essay by increasing the sophistication of word choices Needs Improvement (refer to details below) Serious Problem (refer to details below) Yes Needs improvement - punctuation is accurate but some lapses in spelling are evident Needs improvement - spelling is accurate but some lapses in punctuation are evident Needs improvement - there are lapses in both spelling and punctuation No – punctuation is a serious problem No – spelling is a serious problem No – both punctuation and spelling are serious problems Yes Yes but you should consider revising to reduce length Yes but further development of some points would enhance the essay Yes but there is insufficient relevant subject matter No - it’s too short No – it’s too short because most of the essay is comprised of quotations No - it’s too long