STYLE WORKSHOP
Improving Style: Avoiding Vague Pronouns and Passive Voice
Name _________________________________________________________________ Period _______
1. Nwoye learns new beliefs from the Christian missionaries, and
it helps him transform his life.
To what is “it” supposed to refer? __________________________
Replace “it” with a more specific noun: __________________________
2. Okonkwo ultimately gives up, and this reveals some universal insights for the reader.
This what? ________________________ Add a specific noun after “this,” so “this becomes an adjective rather
than a vague pronoun.
3. In the early years of television, it was said that people would not buy TV’s because they simply did not have
enough time to watch it.
“It was said…” By whom? Add a subject: _____________ suggests that people would not….
What is a more specific noun you could use instead of the last “it”? ________________________
4. Even though Okonkwo tries to courageously defend his people’s culture, it does not justify his vicious
actions.
To what does “it” refer? _____________________________
Replace “it” with a more specific noun: ______________________
5. With this information, it is revealed that a solution must be pursued aggressively and immediately.
“…it is revealed…” By whom? Add a subject: ______________ reveals that …
“…a solution must be pursued…” By whom? Add a subject: ___________ must aggressively and immediately
pursue a solution.
Syntax and Diction Variety
1. Underline or highlight the first 4 words of every sentence of your research paper (including quotes
pulled from research).
 Look for repetitive phrasing (ie, too many S-V openings, repeated wording, etc.)
 Aim to VARY your sentence openings:
o Open some sentences with dependent/subordinate clauses; remember your trigger
words (Because, When, While, If, Until, Although, Since, etc.).
o Open some sentences with phrases (prepositional, participial, infinitive, etc.)
 Aim to VARY sentence types:
o Simple, Compound, Complex, Compound/Complex
2. Circle your main verbs.
 When possible, use active verbs.
 Keep state of being verbs to a minimum: is, are, was, were, be, being, been