Chapter 7
Marriage Relationships
Individual Motivations for Marriage
People get married for a variety of reasons.
• Love
– Is this a mandatory requisite in the U.S?
• Personal fulfillment
– What the heck?
• Companionship
– Obviously… think about lonely nights….
• Parenthood
– Can’t you raise children alone?
• Economic security
– Do we do this consciously?
Societal Functions of Marriage
Important functions of marriage:
• Binds couple together who will reproduce
• Provides physical care for dependent young
• Socializes children into society
• Regulates sexual behavior
• Provides companionship
Marriage as Commitment
Commitment: the intent to maintain a
relationship
• Marriage is a person-to-person commitment.
• Marriage is a family-to-family commitment.
• Marriage is a couple-to-state commitment.
Social policy directs marriage, divorce, and
child support.
Marriage as a Rite of Passage
• Rite of passage: an event
that marks the transition
from one status to another.
• Families cooperate to
produce the wedding.
• Brides often wear
traditional artifacts—
concrete symbols that
reflect a phenomenon).
Changes After Marriage
• While laws vary by state,
partners typically become
part owner of the other’s
income and assets.
• New spouses often develop
increased self-confidence
and adopt new values and
behaviors.
• Marriage affects
relationships with friends.
Changes After Marriage
• The couple’s relationship often changes to
disenchantment—transition from a state of
newness and high expectation to a state of the
mundane tempered by reality.
• Partners shift their focus from each other to
work or children.
Changes After Marriage
Couples also experience (Pg. 137):
•
•
•
•
•
Loss of freedom
More responsibility
Less alone time
Changes in how money is spent
Discovering that one’s mate is different from one’s
date
• Sexual changes
• Power changes
Changes After Marriage
• Marriage affects relationships with parents.
• Only a minority of spouses report that they do
not get along with their in-laws.
• Time spent with extended family rapidly
increases after children are born.
Changes After Marriage
• Marriage involves the need for spouses to
discuss and negotiate how they are going to
get and spend money.
• Debt tends to strain relationships.
Diversity in Marriage
May-December marriage:
age-discrepant marriage.
• Typically the man is older
than the woman.
• Research finds no
difference in reported
marital satisfaction
between age-discrepant
and age-similar marriages.
• Such marriages tend to
benefit men more than
women.
Diversity
Interracial marriages
• About 15% of all marriages in the U.S. are
racially mixed.
• Interracial partners sometimes experience
negative reactions.
– Do the self assessment
• Interracial marriages
are more likely to
dissolve.
Diversity
Interreligious Marriages
• Over one third of marriages in the U.S. are
interreligious.
• The impact of a mixed religious marriage may
depend on the devoutness of the spouses.
• Those who are religious tend to be more
satisfied with their marriages.
Diversity
Cross-national marriages
• Cross-national marriages are becoming more
common.
• Much of the stress of these marriages is
related to society’s intolerance of crossnational marriages.
Diversity
Military marriages
• About 60% of U.S. military personnel are married
and/or have children.
• Military contract marriage: marriage in which a
military person and a civilian participate to get
more money and benefits from the government
• Military marriages are
particularly difficult for
women.
Diversity
Challenges for military marriages:
• Traditional gender roles are challenged.
• Loss of control over deployment
• Infidelity: length of separation increases the
chances of infidelity
• Frequent moves and separations
• Lower marital satisfaction and higher divorce
rates
• Employment problems
Marital Success
Characteristics of couples in happy, stable
relationships
• Personal and emotional commitment
• Common interests/positive self-concepts
• Good communication/effective use of humor
• Religiosity
• Trust
• Not materialistic
Marital Success
Characteristics of couples in happy, stable
marriages
• Positive role models in their parents
• Sexual desire
• Equitable relationships
• Absence of negative attributions
• Forgiveness
• Health
Marital Success
• The Healthy Marriage Initiative is a program
of the U.S. Department of Health and Human
Services.
• Research confirmed the positive effects of
education and support for marriages and
families.