ART BEAT
Emily Ball Cicchini
1812 Pasadena Drive
Austin, TX 78757
(512) 454-3264
emily@zachscott.com
brotherwindchimes@earthlink.net
© by Cicchini
11/24/00
Developed in conjunction with Frontera@Hyde Park Theater
and the TCG/NEA Playwright Residency Program.
Selected as "Best of FronteraFest, 1999"
CHARACTERS:
TOM--An investor. 38. Well built.
TRIXIE--An architect. 40. Thin.
MERCE--Enough said.
(It’s 6:00 PM. TOM walks in, wearing rich casual, puts down his briefcase and
cell phone, in quite-the-perfect open living area/kitchen. Free, lighthearted verbal
sparring throughout:)
TOM
Honey? You home yet? Hmm.
(He goes to the fridge and pulls out a bottle and some strawberries dipped in
creamy brown, pulls out a towel to cover the cork. He puts on some romantic
music and does a little victory dance. TRIXIE enters in expensive work out
clothes. She sneaks up behind him as he pulls the cork...)
TRIXIE
Gottcha!
ART BEAT - 1
1
TOM
(as cork pops)
Whoah! You startled me...
TRIXIE
Consider how boring life would be without a little startle in it.
TOM
Come on. Give me a kiss...Were you working out?
TRIXIE
Dancing...
TOM
Didn’t the doctor tell you to cut back?
TRIXIE
I can’t help it. It makes me feel too good...
TOM
Mmm... And you look good, too... I’ve got news...
TRIXIE
Oh, the Dom...What are you doing? You know I don’t like to get woozy on weekdays...
TOM
I know, I know. But I couldn’t help it. Have a glass...
TRIXIE
No....
TOM
Come on. Just one...
TRIXIE
No, Tom...good news...?
TOM
Sure, good news.
TRIXIE
Okay, okay. Just one. (pause) Well. What is it?
TOM
And look (re: strawberries) Low fat, even...
ART BEAT - 2
2
TRIXIE
No, no no... (he makes her eat one) Mmmm. Must be something profitable.
TOM
What’s for dinner, anyway?
TRIXIE
John Cage. (changes music by remote to Cage)
TOM
I’m serious...
TRIXIE
We’ll just call up the moon and order a delux cheese spread...
TOM
I’ll call Hong’s. They deliver. (dials) Hello, this is Tom Warner, yes, right. How are you?
Fine, fine. Give me, two mushu pork, and an order, no, make that two orders of spring rolls.
(TRIXIE protests) We’re kinda, celebrating, thanks. (hangs up) I closed today. Quite a big deal.
TRIXIE
Oh, the merger, right? They’re going to get you with the capitol gains...
TOM
Well, that’s true...
TRIXIE
Too bad you can’t do something better than give it to the IRS...
TOM
Oh, I get it. You want something.
TRIXIE
Ah, how well you know me...
TOM
Well, just as long as it doesn’t involve one of your long lost causes...
TRIXIE
Why do you say that?
TOM
You know, like that theatre group back in Seattle. What a black hole...
TRIXIE
Actually, I was thinking more about a Jacuzzi. I just know it would help me relax. You know
what a hard time I have relaxing...
ART BEAT - 3
3
TOM
Hey, hey, That’s my job...
TRIXIE
And there was this amazing set of silverware in the Times Magazine...With handles like heavy
metal chains...
TOM
Didn’t we just buy silverware last spring...
TRIXIE
Oh, it wasn’t that expensive, something trendy, like, Calvin Kline, you know, for guests...
TOM
Calvin Kline doesn’t make silverware...
TRIXIE
Or Liz Claiborne, someone. I’ll get Pheobe to look it up. I should probably brush up on this
Martha Stewart stuff. But it just bores me to no end--I’m only interested in the building. Our
interior designer says I’m hopeless...But she’s a total victim of Santa Fe Style...I mean, it seems
like its my duty since we moved West to introduce these people to real culture...Well. Listen to
me talk about me, me, me. Now what about you?
TOM
Naw. I’ve got everything a man could want...
TRIXIE
Come on. There must be something...
TOM
Naw, not really. Hey. Didn’t you have an appointment today...
TRIXIE
Come on! I’ve seen the way you’ve been eyeing those BMW’s...
TOM
I know, I know. It doesn’t seem like me. I was always a Jag man,
TRIXIE
What!
TOM
You know, LandRover, be sensible...the mechanics...I mean, forget it.
TRIXIE
You were brainwashed. (She exits behind dressing divider)
ART BEAT - 4
4
TOM
I just loved that ad campaign. A woman drives through flooded streets, dodging big cruise ships
with a pounding beat and low, low horns. She
comes to a stop, looks up, there’s an old man fishing from the facade of a 30’s or 40’s office
building, Chicago, maybe, Cleveland. She winks. She turns left in front of a huge ocean liner,
arrives at some kind of theater with spotlights and huge crowds, and on the curb is a huge, red
number five. For the new BMW Five. I mean, that is a real work of art.
TRIXIE
(off)
It’s a commercial.
TOM
Yeah, but a good one. I can’t figure out why that stopped it so...cold. It ran incessantly for two
weeks, than vanished. Saturation, then cut off. I guess that makes you want it even more...
(TRIXIE enters in a sexy Victoria’s Secret lounging outfit)
TRIXIE
I like a message a little more complex than buy a BMW.
TOM
So you think I should buy a BMW?
TRIXIE
Of course I do, if it makes you happy. So. That pretty much takes it all, right?
TOM
Yeah. Except for the other, let’s see, 70 for the BMW, 5 for the Jacuzzi, installed, silverware,
what two grand? That leaves about 1.5 mil.
TRIXIE
1.5....
TOM
Yep. Less the...
TRIXIE
Capitol Gains...oh, baby! (she kisses him) That is a deal! I had no idea!
TOM
I mean, 40 percent. That’s well, incorrigible. Makes you think about the tea party and seceding
and all...
TRIXIE
Oh, you. We are in a time of total abundance, the sky is our only limit...
ART BEAT - 5
5
TOM
If we don’t run out of stamina first.
TRIXIE
Life is not about stamina. That's so rustic. It is about love and devotion to what you are doing.
That’s what it means to be a real artist.
TOM
You be whatever you want to be. (He changes music back to romantic, convinces her to dance.
They do. After a beat) How was work today?
TRIXIE
Same old, same old. Drew a little, talked a lot, sent some e-mail, faxed something, had lunch
with Tony from the winery, and confirmed the date to Melbourne.
TOM
Yeah, great, a whole two weeks...
TRIXIE
It’s not too late for you to come with me. I’m gonna be dying surrounded by architects when
what I really want to do is shoot some kangaroos. With my camera, of course...
TOM
No, I can’t. Not now. Too many details to wrap up. These guys were very good to me. I don’t
want to mess things up for them.
TRIXIE
Oh, you’re so generous. There’s still time to make reservations...
TOM
I don’t want to go. I don’t want you to go, either.
TRIXIE
I have to, Tom. I just have too...
TOM
Alright. Alright. (beat) What did the doctor say? It was today, right?
TRIXIE
Nothing.
TOM
He’s your third specialist. He has to have said something...
TRIXIE
They just, they don’t know...
ART BEAT - 6
6
TOM
Wasn’t there some new hormone treatment...
TRIXIE
I don’t know. I don’t know. (beat) I didn’t go. Okay? I just didn’t...feel like...bringing the
whole thing up again...
TOM
You just didn’t feel like it.
TRIXIE
No. Can’t you just leave it at that? (pause. She puts away the strawberries and the champagne)
I'll go. Next week. I promise. Can you come with me to that dinner on the ninth--for the dance
company?
TOM
What?
TRIXIE
Can you come with me to that dinner on the ninth--for the dance company?
TOM
Oh, well, I’ll have to check my calendar...
TRIXIE
It’s important. Deacon will be there, and he just absolutely adores you, you know...He thinks
you’re his long lost son. We need him to do a table for the Cactus Gala. We’re trying to bring in
Merce...
TOM
Who? Merce Cunningham? I thought he was dead...
TRIXIE
Oh no. He still has his company...
TOM
He must be older than...time itself...
TRIXIE
Oh, no. He’s still a vital contributor to the field. He doesn't rely on a manipulative story with a
climax. It’s like abstract painting, where movement, sound, light is in and of itself expressive.
(beat) They’re talking about a residency. He’s actually going to work with our dancers...
TOM
Oh, that’s interesting.
ART BEAT - 7
7
TRIXIE
Commission a whole new piece. Wherever it travels, it will say our name...”Desert Dance
Theatre...”
TOM
What’s with the ‘our...’
TRIXIE
It’s so exciting...
TOM
You just got on the board a few months ago. You’re not even President...Treasurer, even…
TRIXIE
They want me to be...I’m an officer...Acting Secretary....
TOM
But aren’t you doing that whole complex for the heart hospital...
TRIXIE
I know, I know...
TOM
I mean, Trix, you gotta look at your priorities here...what does the most good for the most
people...I mean, we don’t have unlimited time...
TRIXIE
Another cardiac wing. So people will have a snappy place to recover from years of smoking and
eating too much red meat. I’ll just have to resign from the hospital committee, that’s all...
TOM
What has gotten into you...
TRIXIE
Look, honey. Those old boys can take care of it themselves. They’ve got it under control, they
don’t need me. They’re not interested in being beautiful or innovative, just in function and the
bottom line...Life’s so short. I want to do something that makes people feel better, more alive.
The arts do that, don’t you think?
TOM
Maybe. When I’m awake.
TRIXIE
You’re terrible.
ART BEAT - 8
8
TOM
I’m serious. I’m tired of being scolded and mystified by what they’re calling art these days. Like
the last time we were in Houston, the Wilson Hamlet, I mean, what was that...I mean, he’s too
old to play Hamlet, isn’t he? And then he played all the other parts! And why did he keep
repeating the same things, over and over... To be to be to be to be to be…
TRIXIE
It was a tour de force, it was a deconstruction...
TOM
Well, it was boring. It made me want to get to the lobby for a big fat martini...
TRIXIE
But the images...the statements about ritual and relativity...
TOM
Images. If I want images, I’ll go to the movies. They’re more honest, more real.
TRIXIE
Movies aren’t real. They’re linear fabrications. Theatre has the logic of the soul.
TOM
Where did you hear that?
TRIXIE
It’s all in the eye of the observer. Stay here. I want to show you something.
(She exits. He picks up the remote and turns on the television: a ball
game.
Cheering crowds. TRIXIE enters with something under a napkin. She sets it on the table in
front of him. She lifts off the cloth to reveal a winged, pastel washed piece of pottery)
TOM
What is it?
TRIXIE
What do you think it is?
TOM
Did you make this?
TRIXIE
Yes I did, down at Judy’s. She has a huge kiln. But that’s not the point...
TOM
Pretty colors...
ART BEAT - 9
9
TRIXIE
Thank you. But what do you think it is?
TOM
Um... a flower?
TRIXIE
Oh come on now.
TOM
What?
TRIXIE
That’s really what you think it looks like?
TOM
Yeah, an orchid or something, like Georgia O’Keffe...
TRIXIE
Well. Right. I can accept that. I’m actually very flattered...
TOM
But...
TRIXIE
But, it was supposed to be an eagle.
TOM
Of course, of course...I was going to say, eagle...
TRIXIE
It was ‘supposed to represent freedom.
TOM
I’m sorry, I see what you mean now...
TRIXIE
No, no. That’s the whole point, I mean, that’s what I’m saying. Art is what you want it to be...
TOM
But you wanted it to be an eagle...
TRIXIE
That doesn’t matter, that doesn’t matter...
TOM
But you’re disappointed...
ART BEAT - 10
10
TRIXIE
No, no. You have a right to respond how you want to...the true artist pays attention only to the
calling of her vision, regardless of how it is received...
TOM
Good try. (gets more champagne) I’d rather have something you can really put something in.
Functional. Useful. Something you could sell. I mean, it’s all well and good to follow your
vision, or whatever, put people have to want to see the world your way, they have to want what
you make.
TRIXIE
You can’t think about marketing when you’re making art...
TOM
Why not? Things done for commercial reasons are more—American...
TRIXIE
How can you say that? You’re the authority on what’s American...?
TOM
Well, my darling, I’m playing the game, and I’m winning...
TRIXIE
So artists are just not playing the game...
TOM
They haven’t taken the time to find out what the game is. You have to contribute something;
give up your ego, read a little Dale Carnegie...
TRIXIE
Don’t you think they’re a little busy rehearsing for hours and hours and struggling with poverty
so they can create performances that we consume? That’s why we have to support them...we, in
particular, have a responsibility...
TOM
Aw, I don’t mind giving a little start up capital. But renewing contributions year after year--it’s
like rewarding them for breaking the rules.
TRIXIE
That’s not fair. In this economy, they need subsidies to survive...
TOM
Don’t we all...? And I tell you, sometimes, they just give me the creeps, it’s like you can’t trust
ART BEAT - 11
11
them. They act like they’re all interested in your life and what you do, but really, all
they want is your money, and then they don’t want you to have any part of how they use it...
TRIXIE
We can’t censor...
TOM
It’s not censorship. I’m completely tolerant. They can go ahead and be profane, tasteless,
boring, indecent. It’s not like we’re going to put them in jail for it. I believe in free speech.
They can do whatever they want. Just not with my money.
TRIXIE
But, dissonance is vital to culture, it’s what makes us grow...we’re just shells of our true potential
unless we challenge our boundaries...
TOM
Honey, art is only valuable because people like you make it so. If I want dissonance, I’ll watch
Crossfire or Larry King. What’s that one foundation, always on NPR--art in everyday lives?
Doesn’t that just make it--craft? Anybody can do it. So, what’s the point in elevating certain
individuals to the status of near god-hood?
TRIXIE
Honey...
TOM
I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I work hard. Art is play. It just pisses me off that artists feel so,
entitled...isn’t it supposed to be show business? I mean, Broadway doesn’t take handouts...Hollywood either...why does everyplace else have to…
TRIXIE
It's because of the numbers honey. It's so we can have this knock out view when we come home
from a show. So...I guess now would be a bad time to ask for money for Merce...
TOM
What do you think.
TRIXIE
I’m going to put some in especially for this residency, and I thought maybe you could match it...
TOM
I think I’ll stay out of it this time. Besides. I’m thinking about investing in the basketball team.
TRIXIE
What! Like that’s any better...
TOM
It’s just, more sensible...A pro team could bring a lot to this area...
ART BEAT - 12
12
TRIXIE
You’ll pay someone to run up and down the court, but not to dance across a stage...
TOM
Hey, there's a chance I'll get my money back. A slim chance…
TRIXIE
But we'll get so much more back by creating a work of art that could last for years and years, tour
around the country, identify a new star dancer…
TOM
Don’t take it personally, Trix. It’s a matter of preference, personal tastes...
TRIXIE
For artists, it’s a matter of survival...
TOM
Come on. Merce isn’t hurting any.
TRIXIE
But the company, our company...We need this residency. It could open up all kinds of doors for
us. Tom, I'm trying to be financially responsible, and it’s not really looking very good...
TOM
What do you mean, financially responsible? My god, Trixie, did you sign anything without
consulting Pete first...
TRIXIE
Of course not, I just mean, ethically. Please??? (beat) A pledge…
TOM
How much.
TRIXIE
Not much.
TOM
How much?
TRIXIE
50. Thousand.
TOM
My god! I can’t believe...I'm not that liquid right now. All my cash went to the contractors to
finish the house the way you wanted...
ART BEAT - 13
13
TRIXIE
I've got money, too, honey. But we still need a match. I’ve tried all my heavy hitters, and I just
can’t make them bite... We need the leverage for a foundation grant...plus, there's a little from the
NEA…
TOM
My tax dollars...Let’s not even go there. It’s simple economics. If there isn’t the need, it should
stop.
TRIXIE
Stop. You think the company should just stop.
TOM
I said, if it can’t EARN it’s income...
TRIXIE
And you, sponsoring some sport team, or investing, it that EARNED?
TOM
They make a profit!
TRIXIE
I didn’t say profit. I said, what did they do to earn it, baby? Throw a ball through a hoop and
advertise? How does that enrich our lives...
TOM
They make me relax! They don’t make me question my life! Life is hard enough with out all the
negativity and doubting...
TRIXIE
So, art does impact you...
TOM
I said, they have every right...
TRIXIE
You don’t like how it impacts you, so you want to kill it...
TOM
Don’t go overboard, here...
TRIXIE
What are you so afraid of?
TOM
I’m trying to put some sanity in my life! I don’t want to know what those damn artists think
about my choices. If I want to change my life I’ll go to a therapist. If I want humanity, I’ll go to
ART BEAT - 14
14
a fucking church. You and I are supposed to be creating things that last...buildings and
trusts, homes and babies...
TRIXIE
Nothing lasts forever, Tom...all we really have is right now, in right here. This very moment.
This is all we really have. Things are always changing. Why can’t you?
TOM
I’m not listening anymore. Here. Have the last strawberry. I’m going up to bed. (starts for
stairs. Beat)
TRIXIE
For the last time. Please. Help me out with Merce.
TOM
You know, I’ve waited a long time for a break like this. Thought we could celebrate, you know,
for once, together...
TRIXIE
We still can. (beat: offstage) All right. You can come out now...
(A man, very tall, very thin, enters. He might actually be MERCE. He wears a black
turtleneck and dance pants. His hair is curly and tight. He moves very gracefully, puts his
arm into hers)
TRIXIE
I'm sorry to keep you waiting back there. He's just not being reasonable.
MERCE
Did you tell him that we're a 501 (c) 3 tax-exempt charitable and educational corporation?
TRIXIE
That's right, Tom, it is tax-deductible!
MERCE
Actually, you'd have to consult your tax specialist for full eligibility.
TOM
Who are you? A professional fund raiser? Do you have a license for that?
TRIXIE
Come on, then, let's go back to the hotel… Shall we?
(Brings MERCE with her to get her purse)
TOM
Trixie, please--you’re not even dressed!
ART BEAT - 15
15
MERCE
What’s up with him?
TRIXIE
(as they exit, To MERCE)
Don’t worry, darling. There are still a few stones to turn over. We'll try again in the morning.
And, thanks so much for the private lesson...
MERCE
It was my pleasure. One does not have to study in order to dance. It is given to all of us—but not
for free.
TRIXIE
Goodbye, Tom. Don't wait up.
TOM
Hold on just a minute! What are you doing? Where are you going? Who are you?
(They exit. A beat.)
TOM (Cont.)
Fucking MERCE?!?
(Quick blackout. End)