CD, Section VII: Parent Interview page SECTION 1 VII Parent Interview Introduction This section offers a structured interview protocol that contains the essential information that should be obtained from the parent interviews in each custody evaluation. In reviewing evaluations, it is often useful to consider (a) whether this information is included in the report of the evaluation, and also (b) how the information was obtained by the evaluator. Evaluators can adapt this interview protocol for their own use by adding the appropriate contact information. As I noted in the text, this is not a psychological test; it is simply a more organized way to collect and record information. Before meeting with each parent, evaluators should insert any additional questions that are needed in order to explore areas of difficulty suggested by the completed Parent Questionnaire. If a question has been answered fully by the Parent Questionnaire, simply remove it or indicate that it was already answered in the Parent Questionnaire. (“PQ” works well for this purpose.) Leaving the completed topic in the Parent Interview form has the advantage of providing a list of all completed topics in one location. o Domestic Violence. The Parent Interview contains a series of questions pertaining to domestic violence. (See pages 14-21 of the Parent Interview.) If you are sure that this is not an issue, you can delete that portion of the questionnaire or simply skip over those questions during your interview. Many of these questions focus on the management of conflict within the couple, however, which is important information even when domestic violence is not present. For this reason, it is better to ask these questions in a matterof-fact manner with all parents. CD, Section VII: Parent Interview page 2 o Substance Abuse. The Parent Interview contains a series of questions designed to screen for abuse of alcohol and drugs. (See pages 5-8 of the Parent Interview). If this is an issue in the family you are evaluating, you will need to employ additional methods for assessing substance abuse. See Chapter 22 for a discussion of this issue. CD, Section VII: Parent Interview page PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION, page 1 3 [Name of evaluator] PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION [ ] Warning of limited confidentiality administered Interview Date:________ Name of parent:_____________________________________________ DOB:_____________Age:_______________SSN___________________ [Check for inclusion in responses to Parent Questionnaire.] Family Background: [Additional questions, beyond Parent Questionnaire or to explore responses on PQ.] Town growing up: Parents: What kind of person was/is your mother? What kind of person was/is your father? How did your parents get along with each other when you were growing up? Medical problems in family of origin: How did the family medical problems affect you as a child? Special issues in family of origin: Physical abuse Sexual abuse Alcoholism CD, Section VII: Parent Interview PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION, page 2 Substance abuse Mental Illness DSS involvement page [Name of evaluator] Are members of your extended family involved with your children? Who, and in what way? Education: [Additional questions, beyond Parent Questionnaire] How would people who knew you in high school describe you? How would people who knew you in college/technical school describe you? Did you have any disciplinary problems in school? Any behavioral problems with students or teachers? Did you have a job when you were in high school? Did you have a job during college/technical training? 4 CD, Section VII: Parent Interview page PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION, page 3 5 [Name of evaluator] Employment history: [Additional questions, beyond Parent Questionnaire] Do you like your current job? Why, or why not? Do you plan to stay in your current job? What would your current boss say about you? Have you ever been fired from a job? When and why? If you are not working outside the home right now, are you planning to do so in the future? If yes, when? Why? What kind of work/job would you like to do? Health: (Get release forms for medical providers.) Do you have any major health problems? How do these affect your parenting? Alcohol Use: [Expands on questions asked in PQ.] 1. During the last year have you had a feeling of guilt or remorse about your drinking? Y N 2. During the last year has a friend or family member ever told you about things you said or did while you were drinking that you could not remember? Y N 3. During the last year have you failed to do what was normally expected from you because of drinking? Y N CD, Section VII: Parent Interview page PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION, page 4 6 [Name of evaluator] 4. Do you sometimes take a drink in the morning when you first get up? Y N ****************************************************************************************************************************************************** 5. During the last year have you had five or more drinks on at least one occasion? Y N 6. During the last year did you drink as often as once a month? Y N ****************************************************************************************************************************************************** 7. Have you ever felt you should cut down on your drinking? Y N 8. Have other people annoyed you by criticizing your drinking? Y N ****************************************************************************************************************************************************** 9. Have you ever been in an alcohol-related car accident or been charged with OUI? Y N 10. Have you ever been in a fight or been arrested because of your drinking? Y N 11. Have you ever attended a self-help program like AA or SMART? Do you attend a regular group? When and where? Y N What is the name of your sponsor? How often do you attend AA? 12. Have you ever participated in a treatment program for your drinking? When? Where? Y N 13. Does anyone in your family abuse alcohol? Who? What is their drinking pattern? Y N Drug Use: [Expands on questions asked in PQ.] Have you ever used drugs, other than medication prescribed for you? What type? How frequently? How much? (Include number of bags, grams, joints, pills) What age were you when you first tried drugs? How much then? What kind? CD, Section VII: Parent Interview page PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION, page 5 7 [Name of evaluator] Has your drug use changed in the past year? Have you ever felt that you ought to cut down on your drug use? When? Have other people criticized your drug use? Have you ever felt bad or guilty about your drug use? Have you ever taken a drug first thing in the morning to steady your nerves or to get rid of a hangover? Have you ever found that you could not remember what you did while you were taking drugs? When was the last time? Has your drug use ever interfered with your family life or your work? Have you ever been in a drug-related car accident or been charged with DUI? Have you ever been in a fight or been arrested because of your drug use? Have you ever attended a self-help program for your drug use, like NA or AA? Why? When and where? Do you attend a regular group? What is the name of your sponsor? When and where? CD, Section VII: Parent Interview page PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION, page 6 8 [Name of evaluator] How often do you attend ? Have you ever participated in a drug treatment program? When? Where? Was it helpful? How? Does anyone in your family use drugs? What is their pattern of drug use? Who? Are you required to have drug testing of any kind right now? Mental Health: [Get release forms. The questions expand on the ones in the PQ. Check for consistency.] Do you take any medications? Which ones, and how much, how often? Have you ever been given a psychiatric diagnosis? Have you ever been hospitalized for psychiatric reasons? Have you ever been in psychotherapy? Legal Involvement [Elaborate on answers from PQ, except for charges related to current custody dispute, which are covered later in interview].] I see from your Parent Questionnaire that you were arrested in ……. tell me more about this incident. Please CD, Section VII: Parent Interview page PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION, page 7 9 [Name of evaluator] Religion: [Questions not in PQ] Did you attend church/synagogue as a child? Did you attend church/synagogue during your marriage/relationship? Did your partner/spouse attend with you? Do you attend church/synagogue now? How often? Which one? Do you take the children with you? Is religious practice an area of agreement or dispute with your partner/spouse? Living Situation: [Only if needed to expand on responses to PQ.] Previous Relationships: [Only previous marriages are in PQ, not other children. Check for consistency.] #1 - Name of partner _______________________ Dates (your age)________ Children: Name(s) and ages_______________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ Where do the children live now?___________________________________________ CD, Section VII: Parent Interview PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION, page 8 page 10 [Name of evaluator] Why did the relationship end? #2 - Name of partner _______________________ Dates (your age)________ Children: Name(s) and ages_______________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ Where do the children live now?___________________________________________ Why did the relationship end? #3 - Name of partner _______________________ Dates (your age)________ Children: Name(s) and ages_______________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ Where do the children live now?__________________________________________ Why did the relationship end? #4 - Name of partner _______________________ Dates (your age)________ Children: Name(s) and ages_______________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ Where do the children live now?__________________________________________ Relationship in current custody dispute: see next page CD, Section VII: Parent Interview PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION, page 9 page 11 [Name of evaluator] RELATIONSHIP IN CUSTODY DISPUTE/PARENTING EVALUATION [Detailed information, not included in PQ.] Beginning of relationship: How did you meet? What attracted you to him/her? How did the relationship develop? What was the best period of the relationship? Why was it the best? Outside relationships: Friends Did you have good friends, and if so, how often did you see them? Did your partner have good friends, and how often did they see them? Family Did your family live nearby, and how often did you se them? Did your partner’s family live nearby and how often did they see them? Did either of you stand in the way of the other seeing or visiting with friends or family? How did that affect your seeing them? Leisure Time What did you and your partner do for fun? Could you and your partner enjoy relaxing activities or hobbies without conflict? What were some of them? CD, Section VII: Parent Interview PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION, page 10 page 12 [Name of evaluator] Employment and Finances Who worked while you and your partner were together? Who paid the bills and managed the family finances? Did either of you have more say in financial decisions (buying TV, car, house, etc.)? What amount of money could either of you spend without first checking with the other? Has either of you stood in the way of the other taking a certain job or pursuing further education? If so, how and with what outcome? Childcare: Did one of you stay home with the children when they were young? Who got up with the children in the night for feedings, nightmares, etc? How did your children get to school? Who took your children to the doctor? Who helped the children with their homework? What did you do with your children? What was your favorite thing to do with them? What did your partner do with the children? What was their favorite thing to do with them? CD, Section VII: Parent Interview PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION, page 11 page 13 [Name of evaluator] Couple decision-making style When it came to important decisions in your relationship, how were they made? Family “chores” (Who decided who did what at home?) Children’s issues o How did you and your partner handle discipline? o What forms of consequences or punishments did you use? Did you use physical punishment (spanking, etc.)? If so, in what manner? o Have you or your partner ever hurt the children physically? Conflict Management in Couple If you or your partner/spouse started an argument or a “fight,” what was that like? o If I were a fly on the wall, what would I see or hear? Who started most of the arguments? o Did the other person argue back? How often did you argue? What were the issues you argued most about? o Did you raise your voice? If so, how much? o Did your partner raise his/her voice? If so, how much? What kind of language might you and your partner use? CD, Section VII: Parent Interview PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION, page 12 page [Name of evaluator] o What words did you use that would hurt your partner the most? How often did you use them? What words did your partner use that hurt you the most? How often did they use them? If there were verbal insults: How did this affect you? Your partner? Has your partner ever insulted you or put you down in public? If yes, describe. Have you ever insulted or put down your partner in public? If yes, describe. Are there any other kinds of “buttons” your partner has that you can push to upset them? Have your fights ever gone beyond words or yelling? If yes, please describe. 1. In an argument, have either of you ever: Thrown things? Broken things that belonged to your partner? Punched walls? Slammed doors? Left the other in a place where you have driven together? Kept the other up at night to “talk,” so that they were sleep-deprived? 14 CD, Section VII: Parent Interview PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION, page 13 page [Name of evaluator] 2. Has your partner ever gotten “physical” with you? If so, when and how? Was it more than once? If so, please describe the first time. Please describe the last time. Please describe the worst time. What made it the worst time? Has your partner ever used a weapon (object, knife, gun?) What did you do when this happened? What triggered these incidents? How did the violence affect you? Were either of you drinking or using drugs during these incidents? Has it ever happened to you in other relationships? 15 CD, Section VII: Parent Interview PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION, page 14 page [Name of evaluator] 3. Have you ever become “physical” with your partner? If so, when and how? Was it more than once? If so, please describe the first time. Please describe the last time. Please describe the worst time. What made it the worst time? Have you ever used a weapon (object, knife, or gun?) What did your partner do when this happened? What triggered these incidents? Were either of you drinking or using drugs during these incidents? How did the violence affect your partner? 4. Have either one of you ever been harmed or injured in any of these encounters? If so, how? Did either of you tell anyone, such as: friend family member 16 CD, Section VII: Parent Interview PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION, page 15 counselor minister/priest/rabbi police page [Name of evaluator] (Include date and location; get release form) Did either of you seek medical attention? o Where? (Include date and name of facility; get release form) o What was the outcome? Pets Did you have any pets? How were they treated? Were they ever abused or mistreated? Sex (In your sexual relationship with ___...) Have you ever been coerced or forced into sexual activity you did not want, that is had sexual relations when you truly did not want to? Were you ever forced to perform sexual acts you did not want to do? If so, describe. Have you ever coerced your partner into that? If so, how did you coerce him/her? 17 CD, Section VII: Parent Interview PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION, page 16 page [Name of evaluator] Have you ever been forced to view pornography despite your refusal? Have either of you ever refused sexual relations with the other as a means of getting what you want, other than occasionally when angry? 5. Were you ever afraid of your partner? If so, what were you afraid of? Did you ever obtain a Restraining Order against them? (Include time and location, get release form.) Are you still afraid? Were they ever afraid of you? What do you think they were afraid of? Did they ever obtain a Restraining Order against you? (Include time and location; get release form.) Are they still afraid? 6. Have you or your partner ever threatened divorce [or separation] in an argument? 7. Have you or your partner ever threatened suicide in an argument? 18 CD, Section VII: Parent Interview PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION, page 17 page 19 [Name of evaluator] Have either of you ever attempted suicide? Did that person receive medical treatment? (Include date & Name of facility; complete release form) 8. Have you or your partner ever threatened to take the kids, or to get them in a custody battle? Has your partner ever told you will never see the kids again if you leave the partner? Have you ever told your partner this? 9. Is there any pattern to these physical fights and confrontations? 10. Where were the children during these times? If they were up, --what did they see? --what did they do? (try to intervene, run and hide, etc?) If they were asleep, what might they have heard if they were awake? CD, Section VII: Parent Interview PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION, page 18 What do you think has been the effect on them? Have you noticed any changes in their behaviors? (With either of you, each other, friends, or at school) page [Name of evaluator] 20 CD, Section VII: Parent Interview page PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION, page 19 CHILDREN IN EVALUATION 21 [Name of evaluator] [Elaborates on information in PQ; check for inconsistencies.] Please describe each of your children. Child #1 (oldest): Name________________________ DOB_________ Age______ Personality/temperament Health (Get release form for pediatrician.) Activities Friends School (Get release form) School Grade Teacher Abilities/Strengths Weaknesses/Special Needs Favorite things to do with you Understanding and reaction to the separation/divorce What have you told them about the separation/divorce? How have they reacted to the separation/divorce? CD, Section VII: Parent Interview PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION, page 20 How do you reassure them about the separation/divorce? Psychotherapy (Get release form. Explain privilege issues.) Is [child #1] in counseling or psychotherapy? Who do they see? (Name, contact information) When did they start therapy? Why? Has the therapy been useful? How? Other important information about child #1 page [Name of evaluator] 22 CD, Section VII: Parent Interview PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION, page 21 page [Name of evaluator] Child #2: Name________________________ DOB_________ Age______ Personality/temperament Health (Get release form for pediatrician.) Activities Friends School (Get release form) School Grade Teacher Abilities/Strengths Weaknesses/Special Needs Favorite things to do with you Understanding and reaction to the separation/divorce What have you told them about the separation/divorce? How have they reacted to the separation/divorce? 23 CD, Section VII: Parent Interview PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION, page 22 How do you reassure them about the separation/divorce? Psychotherapy (Get release form. Explain privilege issues.) Is [child #2 in counseling or psychotherapy? Who do they see? (Name, contact information) When did they start therapy? Why? Has the therapy been useful? How? Other important information about child #2 page [Name of evaluator] 24 CD, Section VII: Parent Interview PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION, page 23 page [Name of evaluator] Child #3: Name________________________ DOB_________ Age______ Personality/temperament Health (Get release form for pediatrician.) Activities Friends School (Get release form) School Grade Teacher Abilities/Strengths Weaknesses/Special Needs Favorite things to do with you Understanding and reaction to the separation/divorce What have you told them about the separation/divorce? How have they reacted to the separation/divorce? 25 CD, Section VII: Parent Interview PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION, page 24 How do you reassure them about the separation/divorce? Psychotherapy (Get release form. Explain privilege issues.) Is [child #3 in counseling or psychotherapy? Who do they see? (Name, contact information) When did they start therapy? Why? Has the therapy been useful? How? Other important information about child #3 page [Name of evaluator] 26 CD, Section VII: Parent Interview PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION, page 25 page [Name of evaluator] Child #4: Name________________________ DOB_________ Age______ Personality/temperament Health (Get release form for pediatrician.) Activities Friends School (Get release form) School Grade Teacher Abilities/Strengths Weaknesses/Special Needs Favorite things to do with you Understanding and reaction to the separation/divorce What have you told them about the separation/divorce? How have they reacted to the separation/divorce? 27 CD, Section VII: Parent Interview PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION, page 26 How do you reassure them about the separation/divorce? Psychotherapy (Get release form. Explain privilege issues.) Is [child #4 in counseling or psychotherapy? Who do they see? (Name, contact information) When did they start therapy? Why? Has the therapy been useful? How? Other important information about child #4 page [Name of evaluator] 28 CD, Section VII: Parent Interview PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION, page 27 Parenting Abilities [Not in PQ] 1. What are your strengths as a parent? 2. What are your weaknesses as a parent? 3. How would your ex-spouse/partner describe you as a parent? 4. What are your ex-spouse’s strengths as a parent? 5. What are their weaknesses as a parent? 6. How do the two of you work together as parents? page [Name of evaluator] 29 CD, Section VII: Parent Interview page PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION, page 28 HISTORY OF CUSTODY DISPUTE [Not in PQ] [Name of evaluator] 30 CD, Section VII: Parent Interview page PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION, page 29 CURRENT CONCERNS/DESIRES re. custody [Name of evaluator] [Expands on questions in PQ] I see from your questionnaire that you want your children to live ……… Why would that be the best arrangement for the children? What kind of parenting time should the non-custodial parent have? Why would that be best for the children? I see from your questionnaire that you think decisions about your children should be made (jointly with the other parent; by yourself; by the other parent). Why do you think this would be best for the children? Can you and your ex-partner make decisions together about the children? What areas can you agree about? Would you need professional help in decision-making? (Need for Parent Coordinator) 31 CD, Section VII: Parent Interview PARENT INTERVIEW – CHILD CUSTODY EVALUATION, page 30 ADDITIONAL ISSUES/CONCERNS page [Name of evaluator] 32